[ 3 / biz / cgl / ck / diy / fa / ic / jp / lit / sci / vr / vt ] [ index / top / reports ] [ become a patron ] [ status ]
2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/ck/ - Food & Cooking

View post   
File: 15 KB, 882x758, 400.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17245041 No.17245041 [Reply] [Original]

>got promoted from dishwasher to line cook due to staffing shortages
>think my first week went well
>the other cooks start calling me Crock Pot
>cool, I have a nickname already
>feel proud and change my name tag to say Crock Pot
>later the other dishwasher said they call me Crock Pot because I'm a slow cooker

Jesus, a restaurant is really just high school 2.0

>> No.17245049

It's just banter bro. It was literally your first week. Chill out.

>> No.17245056

>>17245041
>getting outbantered by illegals and junkies
M8 you're not cut out for this life.

>> No.17245058

>>17245041
Step it up, Crockpot

>> No.17245068

>>17245041
You should legit quit. The bullying is only going to get worse.

>> No.17245074

Start cracking under the pressure and they might rename you pressure cooker.

>> No.17245080

Fuck, that's a good nickname. Why hasn't my team used that yet?

>> No.17245185

>>17245041
It's just banter man, they use it to deal with stress. People give each other shit all the time on the line. When it would happen to me my go to line was to say "guys don't hurt my feelings, you know I'm a sensitive boy. You're gonna make me cry, like this": then pretend to cry with a long and low pitched "aoooouuuuuuuuu" or any other general retarded or fucked up sounding cry

>> No.17245192

>>17245041
Why are you working for zog?

>> No.17245196

>>17245041
>because I'm a slow cooker
What's so bad about that unless it's a rush hour?

>> No.17245204

>>17245041
You're literally making friends. Guess you've never been a real man around men before. We insult eachother all day for fun. I say you handled it good and I'd respect you for it. I don't respect you now but I would've, that nametag shit is hilarious

>> No.17245212

>>17245041
Literally all of life is highschool, people don't change

>> No.17245213

we used to call the dishwasher "faggot" and "retard"

>> No.17245227

>>17245204
Stop defending toxic masculinity. Me and my friends never insult each other.

>> No.17245232

>>17245041
Show them how fast you can get some water boiling.

>> No.17245238

>>17245227
Nice b8 m8

>> No.17245241

>pastry chef yells my name and says she needs me immediately
>scream back IM COMING IM COMING
>she says COME ON MY TITS
>I freeze up
>she just laughs at me

I miss working in a restaurant

>> No.17245247

>>17245041
Just see what car they drive and follow them home after work eazypeezy

>> No.17245255

>>17245227
haha fags

>> No.17245256

>>17245247
Dude's having a cry because they called him Crock-pot, fuck is he going to do when he follows them home blow them?
Haha, then they could call him Cock-pot.

>> No.17245263

>>17245256
OHNONONO OP

>> No.17245267

>>17245263
Promoted from Dickwasher to Cock-pot

>> No.17245268

>>17245212
the final blackpill
nobody changes after they hit teenage years

>> No.17245281

>>17245241
>Pulling #10 cans of tomatoes off the dry goods shelf to pass down to the general manager.
>She's older than me and doesn't seem real strong so passing them one at a time. They come in a box of 4.
>She yells, "You're too damn slow, just set the box on my tits, I can slide to to the counter!"
>Grab a whole box and lower it onto her tits. She slides it down her chest to the counter.
>She gets back into position for the next one.
They weren't great tits, but they were huge and I guess they still got the job done.

>> No.17245289

>>17245204
Also one day just change it to Pol Pot and threaten to send your coworkers to “work camps”.

>> No.17245296

>>17245281
This is why I am here on /ck/. These stories.

>> No.17245299

>>17245281
haha did you get trapped in the walk in with her and have to bang for body warmth?

>> No.17245311

>>17245213
We throw "faggot" around like dollars bills at a midwest strip club. For some reason we've never picked up "retard"; cooks use it on occasion but it's not become commonplace.

>> No.17245313

>>17245241
Well, did she ever let you?

>> No.17245315

>>17245299
Yes, I had to use her massive tits to keep my cell phone warm enough so the signal had strength to pierce the insulation. To talk on the phone I was literally required to motorboat those tiddies, but it was for the express emergency purpose of communication, how dare you think anything else.

>> No.17245316

>>17245227
you and your friends are fags

>> No.17245323

>>17245041
HAHAHAHAHA
OP is a slow cooking chud

>> No.17245332

>>17245041
>Crock Pot
I'm in stitches

>> No.17245342

>>17245296
>Same GM is eating a poorly formed pastry and licking/sucking the pastry cream from it and her fingers.
pastry cream = crème pâtissière but I'm not a faggot.
>As she leaves the pastry shop devouring her treat a line cook observes how much she seems to like it.
>Smooth as silk she traps a just now arrive flamboyantly gay pastry cook against the front of the dish pit and says loudly -but right to him, "I'd suck pastry cream off of anything...
>We all laugh, he clocks in.

>> No.17245345

>>17245041
Welcome to the real world, where high school never ended.

t.works for a hospital

>> No.17245349

>>17245342
S-sultry wench

>> No.17245352

>>17245342
No other stories I can remember. She took the gig as a favor to the owner and as soon as her husband got a new job she fucked off to do things she cared about, charities or some shit.

>> No.17245354

>>17245342
lay it on us
how fat is she?

>> No.17245356

>>17245041
Yeah that's why you find the bully and punch him in the dick. They think you're a bitch and this will only get worse if you don't address it.

>> No.17245357

>>17245313
Uh, no

>> No.17245388

>>17245299
No. She was one of the best bosses I ever had. Couldn't quite keep up with kitchen banter, but didn't hold it against us when she couldn't. She'd just go to FOH or the office and come back in an hour to bust nuts again. Had an unwritten policy that her solid cooks could take bottles of beer after a shift as long as we logged them. I finally got permission from her and the next day asked where the log sheet was. She said, "There's no fucking log, just don't drink me dry."
>>17245315
That dirty dick sucker isn't me. I hope no one fucks that retard.

>> No.17245407

>>17245354
I mean she had a belly, and huge tits but she was on her feet all day everyday. She'd bus tables, cook breakfast, she would run the dish pit if she had to but the chef had hell to pay if it came to that. She could've lost 30lbs or so, but she wasn't a landwhale. She was solid.

>> No.17245437

>>17245407
One thing she taught me, well, you can’t work while you’re horny, she’d say. And she would do what it took to make sure there were no horny men on her shift. I have low T so I’m rarely horny but on a few occasions, well…, she really, uh, helped me. Although I could probably have done without the prostrate exam…

>> No.17245453
File: 41 KB, 566x412, image040.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17245453

>>17245437
Take it to /lit/ you LARPing faggot.

>> No.17245460

>>17245437
Dude, you two don't even write in similar ways. You're not annoying nor amusing anyone, you're just showing that you have nothing original to add to the subject.

Nothing original to add, on 4Chan.

>> No.17245469

>later the other dishwasher said they call me Crock Pot because I'm a slow cooker
thats fucking hilarious lmfao

>> No.17245473

>>17245453
not even him, but it's obvious enough that it doesn't require explaining that it's not the same guy
cool the autism and just scroll past it

>> No.17245519

>>17245041
>>Crock Pot
i'm rekt..LOL

theres a hippy guy that works seasonally and he takes naps in the breakroom. someone sharpied a dot in the center of head and no one told him about it. it dyed his skin and now he has a purple stain on his head.. everyone calls him dot.

>> No.17245532

>sous chef makes a shit ton of lasagna or some shit
>drops it on the floor and screams

>> No.17245540

>>17245241
And then the pastries clapped

>> No.17245581

>>17245041
https://youtu.be/sHPHhsHz2c4?t=923

>> No.17245773

>>17245041
>Jesus, life is really just high school 2.0
fixed that for you

>> No.17245786

>>17245041
Are they mean to you otherwise? Because that's how nicknames work. They tend to be deprecating or exaggerated.

>> No.17245816
File: 31 KB, 660x574, 07a4da3f313f.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17245816

>>17245041
imagine being such an eager to please wagecuck that you get a promotion. if you "worked your way up" that means you're a huge brown nose.

>> No.17245819

>>17245786
psychos don't treat people like shit all of the time
i had an overweight coworker who had the nickname "bitchtits" by the warehouse guy and his own manager
this guy thought he was friends with the manager and even hung out and drank with him, none the wiser
when i pieced the bits together, i realized that normalfags are subhuman and can never be trusted
no matter how nice they seem to you, they'll be trashing and joking about you behind your back

>> No.17245884

>>17245041
Just remind them you get paid the same as them.

>> No.17245895

>>17245819
You were bitchtits, weren't you?

>> No.17245904

>>17245895
no, he was just one of the nicest guys ive ever met, and hearing how the older guys talked about him hurt my soul

>> No.17245910

>>17245884
That's a good one. Solid bants.
Seriously OP, learn to give and take. That really is what it's like to have male friends. You should understand this, because you post on 4chan which takes that joking hostility to extremes all the damn time.

>> No.17245914

>>17245904
I'm really sorry for you bitchtits.

>> No.17245921

>>17245904
I'm sorry to hear that. I'm presuming the guy wasn't aware he was being called this. People can be rude. I'm not clear what normalfags means in this context, or what you're generalizing it to, but I hope this didn't lead you to believe that everyone is talking about you behind your back.

>> No.17245936

>>17245921
i think a healthy skepticism of coworkers is good
high school never ends for 99% of people, so you should assume people are shittalking in some way about you

>> No.17245973

>>17245041
You need to get feared, time to dunk someone's head into the deep fryer

>> No.17246003

>>17245540
Must be American pastries

>> No.17246013

>>17245227
My buddies call me Rainforest, because I'm autistic and "smarter than Forest Gump, but not as smart as rain man," and it cracks me up every fucking time. It's just bants, mate. You just gotta roll with it.

>> No.17246022

>>17246013
bants only work with trust

>> No.17246096
File: 18 KB, 522x118, hr.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17246096

>>17245540
and then the reddit reddited

>> No.17246140

>>17245041
>Where's my order crockpot?

>> No.17246196

>>17246013
Kek your autistic

>> No.17246611

>>17246096
>hurr durr le reddit reddit
>knows his reddit memes
Why do redditfags always call out other redditfags? You're just drawing attention to yourself.

>> No.17247302
File: 60 KB, 720x480, 1641727335266.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17247302

>>17245041
Huge kek!
I worked at red lobster when I was 19 (21 years ago now)
This one Mexican (they were all Mexican) kept calling me La Parka (I had no idea what he was talking about)
(Apparently La Parka was some Mexican wrestler who dressed up as a skeleton)
I was young and skinny, white, and had a shaved head so I prob did look like a skeleton, lol
One day I called him out on the line (I literally went crazy) and told him I would beat the shit out of him if he kept calling me that, he never called me it again. (LOL I still remember the look in his eyes)
(Keep in mind I was never a big tough guy, I had just had enough, I was just trying to work like everyone else. I didn't need the stress of the kitchen while this dumbfuck tried to look big for his friends)
I never had a problem with him again.

People are dicks, call them out on it, they look for easy targets

>> No.17247307

>>17245192
Why does Israel need potstickers 15 minutes before we close?

>> No.17247314

>>17245041
>they call me Crock Pot because I'm a slow cooker
Apparently you're not just slow at cooking either.

>> No.17247315

>>17245049
fpbp
never worked in a kitchen but as a construction worker i can tell you that bantz is definitely a good sign

>> No.17247324
File: 9 KB, 250x250, 1578554251362.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17247324

>>17245041
Cock Pot lmao

>> No.17247336

>>17245185
are you autistic?

>> No.17247376

>>17247336
I don't think so. I mean these guys weren't strangers, I had been working and hanging out with them for almost 5 years. They knew I was fucking around

>> No.17247396

>>17245041
If you can't handle banter, you're not cut out for most forms of work.
Stop being such a faggot.

>> No.17247452

>>17246013
The people in highschool legit called me Jew because I look vaguely Jewish. They would throw change on the ground and tell me to pick it up. It was so constant and intense that I once referred to Jews as "my people" before catching myself. One of the teachers even asked me if I would be offended if we had Christmas stuff up in December.

>> No.17247467

>>17245227
The point of banter is to make each other emotionally strong
Guess you and your friends are not and that's sad

>> No.17247468

>>17247452
Post nose

>> No.17247476

>>17247468
No but when I was younger I was told I looked really similar to David Krumholtz, who was the actor that played Santa's very-Jewish right hand elf in the Santa Clause movie with Tim Allen.

>> No.17247489

>>17247452
kek is this a pasta or did you go to school in russia?

>> No.17247522

>>17245049
getting a banter nickname is better than just getting fired or getting the shit kicked out of you

>> No.17247536

>>17247489
Not pasta and not Russia, just an alternative high school in a based state. The craziest part was that the teachers never told them to stop.

>> No.17247565

>>17247476
I never realized he was a Kyke

>> No.17247572

>>17245041
That is some really mild banter.
I assume the other staff are white if that's their idea of spicy.

>> No.17247690

>>17245311
Colin Quinn of all people taught me a good one;
You can tear a dollar bill in half and fold it up a little and the stripper things she's getting a dollar when she's getting 50 cents.
But you can't go back to that place again.

>> No.17247729

>>17247572
Probably. Some dude at my job was jokingly talking about how he wanted to kill himself and he stopped himself mid-sentence and apologized to me because he thought I would get offended for some reason. Then there's that one dude who made an Holocaust joke and got fired shortly after. Crazy world we live in.

>> No.17247742

>>17247452
you should claim birthright and go on a holy mission to your homeland

>> No.17247754

>>17245074
kek you son of a bitch

>> No.17247764

>>17245041
t. crockpot
lmao

>> No.17247833

>>17245816
Unironically based, the only good thing about promotions is the extra dosh.

>> No.17247902

>>17245816
Biggest cope I've seen in quite a while.

>> No.17247908

>>17245041
Crock Pot > Betty Crocker, nickname-wise

>> No.17247946

>>17245227
I'm a fag and even me and my fag friends insult each other lol

>> No.17248319

>>17245904
his name was Robert Paulson

>> No.17248687

>>17245041
Don't worry about it, focus on your work & you're gonna make it.

>> No.17248820

>>17245289
Might be too high brow for a kitchen.

>> No.17249027

>>17245041
Why don’t you just quit and get a better job? I’d be embarrassed about cooking food for a living lmao. Like, 50/hour jobs are everywhere and you’re making literally nothing like a loser.

>> No.17249031

>>17245204
You have no self respect and let your friends harass you and make fun of you because you bleed from your vagina like a fucking woman, pussy. Bend over.

>> No.17249042

>>17245041
Keep up the good work Crock Pot.

>> No.17249057

>>17245041
My journeymen at my first fitting job called me Sugar Tits. I wrote it on my gloves. Own the names people give you and they won't use them in malice.

Also as a former server, line cooks are a quick witted and banterly sort. Banter back, work on getting to speed, and people will learn to like you and depend on you. Don't sweat it so much.

>> No.17249061

>>17245074
lold

>> No.17249066

>>17249031
If you don't call your friends faggots, fat fucks, retards, and other such offensive terms you aren't a real man. You're a fucking woman. I'd go to a gun fight with a knife for my friends and I tell them they're fucking stupid day in and day out. Kys.

>> No.17249074

>>17249066
You're an infant. Australian, perchance? Your subhuman mentality would fit what I've seen of that region.

>> No.17249097

>, a restaurant is really just high school 2.0
At least highschool had decent hours and holidays

>> No.17249119

>>17249074
>I'm a very mature adult because I don't know how to banter with people
You're a fucking joke. No wonder you don't have any friends. Ever heard the phrase 'if I don't pick on you it means I don't like you?' Probably not. Because your capacity for human interaction is woefully limited. And no, I don't live on the prison continent.

>> No.17249148

>>17249119
I'm not very mature, I'm of normal adult maturity. I do know how to banter, and it's not calling "your friends faggots, fat fucks, retards, and other such offensive terms." That's witless apery.

>> No.17249173

>>17249148
You're a fucking pseud. A friendless social reject and a midwit. Fuck off.

>> No.17249522

>>17249148
>I do know how to banter
Yeah I can imagine it now
>Omg you’re such a silly boy!! Silly silly boy! :3

>> No.17249528

there are so many whiny little bitches on here, by christ. i wish i could line up all you piss weak bitches and just slap the living shit out of all of you. god you make me fucking sick

>> No.17249546

>>17249148
I can see your fedora from here

>> No.17249552

>>17245041
OP, listen. Crock Pots may be slow but at least they're reliable. You know what you're getting out of them pretty much every single time, and they can do things that not a lot of other cooking devices can do.
Wear that shit with pride.
Also bullies stop having fun with jokes when you show they don't bother you.

>> No.17249563

>>17247946
Fags can be guilty of toxic masculinity as well. The art ho I was fucking unironically told me that. Just rolled my eyes at that point

>> No.17249706

>>17246013
That's some doublemint dave tier shit ngl

>> No.17249798

I grew up with a kid that was born without arms, just kind of a flipper thing. His nickname was Norms (no arms)

>> No.17249888
File: 3.24 MB, 290x189, 1603594445970.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17249888

>>17245074

>> No.17249894

>>17245185
No wonder they rag you.

>> No.17249902
File: 39 KB, 390x500, 9def7317b7d5c18998cf628b75b1ed14.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17249902

>>17245068
>bullying

>> No.17249904

>>17245212
>>17245268
Ask me how I know you're a man-child.

>> No.17249913

take one of their hands and put it on the grill for a minute or 4 hours, slow cooker style.

>> No.17249918

>>17245041
>got promoted from dishwasher to line cook
lmao you got demoted hard. Enjoy 10x harder work and more stress for $0.75 more.

>> No.17249973

>>17247302
>blew up at your coworkers because they called you La Parka

are you okay anon? also La Parka is based as fuck

>> No.17250233

>>17245227
Here's your (you)

>> No.17250291

I went to Crock Pot's house and gave his mom a Dutch Oven

>> No.17250303

>>17247902
i became ceo of a medium sized company solely through disrespecting my superiors
it's called negging

>> No.17250320

>>17247302
>sperging out over a neat nickname

>> No.17250323

>>17250291
kek

>> No.17250328

>>17245041
Just banter.
Kitchen is happy to have you as long as you aren't a waste of space

>> No.17250383

>>17247302
>get based nickname
>"noooooooooooo i want to be big daddy cool Kevin KWAB Nash"