/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.17181203]

The ultimate breakfast

[Anonymous No.17181219]

>>17181203
Looks great. Can anyone describe it?

[Anonymous No.17181227]

>>17181203
Swap the ham for spinach or smoked salmon and yes, agreed.

[Anonymous No.17181231]

>>17181203
Made it yesterday for me n the missus... kinda... did a brown butter - green chili hollandaise, and used speck instead of proper ham

[Anonymous No.17181243]

>>17181203
is there anyway to keep poached eggs warm without overcooking them? i want to cook about 8, and don’t want to do it before and set them in ice

[Anonymous No.17181293]

>>17181243
Not really - not for any significant length of time. You're better off using more than one pan and trying to do them all simultaneously, or lightly poaching/softboiling, icing, and then finishing everything off under the broiler before the hollandaise goes on.

[Anonymous No.17181344]

>>17181219
Salty coins and milk

[Anonymous No.17181346]

>>17181227
>smoked salmon
You can't say that, I was gonna say that.

[Anonymous No.17181356]

>>17181203
I like mine with corned beef hash instead of ham

[Anonymous No.17181365]

>>17181243
Sue veed

[Anonymous No.17181416]

>>17181356
corned beef hash in general is just good

[Anonymous No.17181425]

>>17181203
>Hollandaise sauce
My ex ruined hollandaise for me because she said it’s similar to how my cum tastes.
I don’t feel like eating jizz.

[Anonymous No.17181431]

>>17181425
kys degenerate

[Anonymous No.17181437]

>>17181431
>degenerate
You don’t seem to quite understand what that word means.

[Anonymous No.17181444]

Hi everyone

[Anonymous No.17181449]

>>17181437
I know the term quite well. You're having premarital sex, and you misplaced the seed to which a child is to be made from, by placing it in a woman's mouth.

[Anonymous No.17181450]

>>17181203
You fucking failure, you forgot bacon.

[Anonymous No.17181461]

>>17181444
welcome, take a seat. Im about to begin.

[Anonymous No.17181471]

>>17181449
>assuming “ex” wasn’t referring to “ex wife”
>implying that giving his very essence in order to provide nourishment to another isn’t one of the most noble acts of selfless generosity a man can possibly undertake

[Anonymous No.17181516]

>>17181471
look at you backpedaling bro. you know, you could just change your ways and live in peace with the universe.

[Anonymous No.17181551]

>>17181516
I did change. Straightened my life out and converted to Shintoism.

[Anonymous No.17181563]

>>17181551
Post a pic of your kantana

[Anonymous No.17181572]

>>17181551
But you're still addicted to humiliating women, which is why your "wife" left.

[Anonymous No.17181574]

>>17181563
>kantana
Do you perhaps mean “kamidana”?

[Anonymous No.17181576]

>>17181574
No, but I did mean Katana.

[Anonymous No.17181622]

>>17181576
I don’t have one of those. I do have a nice nakiri though.

[Anonymous No.17181630]

>>17181622
but why are you so lonely

[Anonymous No.17181688]

>>17181630
No worries, I’m engaged, bro.
And this time to a woman who wants to be married to a husband instead of a career.

[Anonymous No.17181695]

>>17181425
you're disgusting
no one wants you to share that

[Anonymous No.17181697]

>>17181688
You're gonna make it bro, ganbatte

[Anonymous No.17181701]

>>17181697
Looks like Sarek

[Anonymous No.17181712]

>>17181688
It won't last cause you're still a degenerate that wants to humiliate women with your Shintoism/animalistic view of the world and fucking her mouth.

[Anonymous No.17181715]

>>17181243
keep in in a hot bowl of water and dry before serving, an egg holding tank, if you will

[Anonymous No.17181805]

>>17181712
I’m not sure where you’re pulling this fanfiction from, but it really doesn’t apply.

[Anonymous No.17181817]

>>17181805
It's from the information that you've provided of your being.

[Anonymous No.17181838]

>>17181697
ありがとう、ブロくん

[Anonymous No.17181883]

>>17181450
There`s a right way and a wrong way to do that. That`s the wrong way.

[Anonymous No.17181888]

>>17181817
There are two kinds of people in the world: Those who can correctly extrapolate from incomplete data sets,

[Anonymous No.17181930]

>>17181888
>Those who can correctly extrapolate from incomplete data sets,
>And those who pay a few dollars to some data science grad student to do it for them because fuck wasting time on that nerd shit imma head to the club and grind with some hotties just text me when you’re done with that extrapolizing bruh.
Nailed it.

[Anonymous No.17181931]

I know /ck/ shits on Ramsay, but I unironically like his eggs benedict vid.

https://youtu.be/gBJjRYk0yC0

[Anonymous No.17181939]

>>17181930
see, degenerate

[Anonymous No.17181945]

>>17181931
generally his videos are pretty good

[Anonymous No.17181959]

>>17181931
beautiful bacon mmmm posh crispy and beautiful in salads

[Anonymous No.17181967]

>>17181959
hahaha, fucking fish face looking thing.

[Anonymous No.17181995]

>>17181425
If your cum tastes like hollandaise you need to change your diet

[Anonymous No.17182000]

>>17181425
Sounds like you have some tasty jizz.

[Anonymous No.17182033]

>>17181930
I was going for something a little more succinct... something like "And stunned cunts like you," but it didn't matter what you came up with, the whole point of it is that you're wrong.

[Anonymous No.17182066]

>>17181203
Classic, savory breakfast flavors elevated with a slight bit of acidity from the lemon in the hollandaise sauce.

[Anonymous No.17182074]

>>17181450
low class

[Anonymous No.17182081]

>>17182066
Without the lemon, the egg, butter and ham would be far too rich - it's basically an open-faced cholesterol and fat sandwich. Cayenne, green onion, shallot, or even a little bit of hot mustard help cut the richness too. Smoked salmon and capers work nicely for much the same reasons.

[Anonymous No.17182096]

>>17182033
And what is the reason behind you having to prove that an anonymous person that doesn't know you is wrong?

[Anonymous No.17182157]

>>17181203
I'd like it with halloumi and smoked turkey slices

[Anonymous No.17182172]

>>17182096
I'm not supplying proof in the least. I just like singling out the chronically incorrect and telling them that they're wrong.

[Anonymous No.17182185]

>>17182172
keeping trying to convince me lonely chud

[Anonymous No.17182193]

>>17181471
There can be no ex-wives to an honest man, there can be late wives but no ex-wives. A philandering or deserted wife can repent and come back, to an honest husband she will remain his wife until she does.

What God has joined together, let no one separate

[Anonymous No.17182201]

>>17182185
I'm starting to think it might be a genetic disorder. Are your parents often steadfast in misguided beliefs? Do they hold to prejudices when presented contrary evidence?

[Anonymous No.17182292]

>>17181450
Based as fuck

[Anonymous No.17182609]

>>17181203
Ah hem

[Anonymous No.17182621]

>>17182201
Stop trying to convince me, a duderino, that you got your shit together. I aint' gay and won't fuck you. And you're bride to be ain't gonna like finding out that you're gay, and will divorce you.

[Anonymous No.17182627]

>>17181712
What's wrong with fucking some cute chick in her mouth? At least it shuts her up for a while.

[Anonymous No.17182630]

>>17181888
In fact there are three
The Good
The Bad
And The Ugly

[Anonymous No.17182633]

>>17182000
I read somewhere that to have tasty jizz you need to drink a bunch of pineapple juice.

[Anonymous No.17182639]

>>17182157
Nothing wrong with that except that it would be better on some rye or pumpernickel.

[Anonymous No.17182640]

>>17181243
Professional restaurants pre cook them and then store them in ice cold water. Just put them back in hot water for 30 seconds before serving.

[Anonymous No.17182647]

>>17182627
You can also get her to shut up, by satisfying her need to communicate, by actually engaging with her in meaningful conversation.

[Anonymous No.17182660]

>>17182647
Oh yeah, that sure works with cute chicks. That just makes them yammer more.

[Anonymous No.17182821]

>>17182033
>you’re wrong
I was clearly being facetious, anon. You really shouldn’t be taking that greentext so literally.

[Anonymous No.17182839]

>>17182660
And no penis length or amount of money or status will get that woman to yammer on more with you forever and not cheat or divorce you trying to get your attention. Have a conversation with her dude.

[Anonymous No.17182866]

>>17182193
Sure would be nice if that were how reality works.
But we live in an age where if you marry a woman who sees marriage as a simple matter of legal status rather than a covenant, she can and will rationalize ending it if she deems it an inconvenience.

[Anonymous No.17183461]

Holy shit would you faggots fuck off or get back to talking about eggs benedict

[Anonymous No.17183492]

Hollandaise should be sour.
Now I want some...

[Anonymous No.17183736]

>>17183461
Holy shit will you try talking about eggs benedict instead of crying about faggots?

[Anonymous No.17183780]

>>17182630
Good? Bad? I'm the one with the gun.
>You forgot 'Groovy!'

[Anonymous No.17183796]

>>17183461
What do you want to know, cutie? How hollandaise is better with a touch of horseradish and cayenne? How it's absolutely possible to fry the eggs in a ring and lid or softboil them? How the addition of spinach basically constitutes a Florentine (vs. Benedict). That the addition of a splash of lavender tea to a slightly over-lemoned hollandaise basically makes it a Benedict Arnold Palmer.

[Anonymous No.17184125]

>>17181203
The heat of the bun cooks the egg.

[Anonymous No.17184195]

I wish I wasn't so fucking bad at making hollandaise

[Anonymous No.17184204]

>>17183796
> fry the eggs in a ring

I like to do this with a mason jar lid. It gives you perfect mcdonalds style round eggs. Just make sure to break the yolks, squirt a little water into the pan, and cover. They're great in breakfast sandwiches and my family loved them on christmas morning :)

[Anonymous No.17184216]

>>17181227
>>17181346
Smoked salmon is a meme. It's not that good. A whitefish fritter is better, but it's the quality of the sauce that truly makes or breaks a benedict.

[Anonymous No.17184227]

>>17184204
>a mason jar lid
Based multitasker used through multiple generations.
Also makes a damn good biscuit-cutter.

[Anonymous No.17185259]

>>17184204
If you're performing an eggly benediction, keep the yolks intact, and (endlessly stating the obvious) make sure to grease everything.

>>17184216
what's in the sauce would depend on what's going into the fritter. Lake whitefish could use a little dill and shallot, Cod could probably use a bit of lime or grapefruit, and a bit of finely diced chili or some cayenne up top. Pollock could probably use a dollop of hot pepper jelly, or at least some capers. Straight Hollandaise with these fish is just going to seem overly rich. Straight Hollandaise with blackened bass, topped with dill takes a second, but eventually just blends into the eggs - that definitely needs something. Who wants fish that tastes like eggs?

[Anonymous No.17185374]

>>17182839
What real woman doesn't love to suck cock?

[Anonymous No.17185384]

Step aside plebs.

[Anonymous No.17185404]

>>17185374
your dad

[Anonymous No.17185432]

>>17181219
It's like warm apple pie

[Anonymous No.17186428]

>>17182633
can confirm, tastes way better

[Anonymous No.17186441]

>>17181203
>The ultimate breakfast
is pic related

[Anonymous No.17187787]

>>17181203
>>17185384
>>17186441
Breakfast are for wimps

[Anonymous No.17187803]

>>17181203
For me? It's eggs chesapeake

[Anonymous No.17187823]

>>17181344
based

[Anonymous No.17188519]

>>17182640
Oooo thanks for this. I wonder how long they will keep? I'm gunna make a huge bucket of poached eggs so I can just sploosh and flop them into boiling water. Maybe throw some of them at the neighbors.

[Anonymous No.17188614]

>>17185384
Holy fucking based, this anon fucks

[Anonymous No.17189195]

>>17187803
more like eggs cheapskate

[Anonymous No.17189258]

>>17181219
Poached eggs and back bacon on English muffins and drizzled with hollandaise sauce