[ 3 / biz / cgl / ck / diy / fa / ic / jp / lit / sci / vr / vt ] [ index / top / reports ] [ become a patron ] [ status ]
2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/ck/ - Food & Cooking

View post   
File: 354 KB, 1888x968, eatthesquares.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16623474 No.16623474 [Reply] [Original]

You will consume the squares anon!

>> No.16623492

>>16623474
Double your weekly Pfizer booster and upgrade to a PREMIUM meal square once a week and extra hour of recreation time.

Brought to you by GoyTech.

>> No.16623522

>>16623474
I still have no idea why shit like this and soylent keeps getting crowd funded. Like isn't everyone trying to get away from the industrial "scientifically perfected" food, and back to just eating real food? Are people gonna crowdfund spam and wonder break knockoffs next?

>> No.16623537

Ah, the feeling of coming home to a good old fashioned squares thread on /ck/ is a suitable substitute for real companionship and happiness

>> No.16623542
File: 147 KB, 1024x680, Calorie_mate_012.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16623542

>>16623474
If these were Japanese you would be all over them.

>> No.16623552
File: 1.50 MB, 1920x2301, match 3 squares to get real food.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16623552

I'm actually intrigued. They are cheap enough I may get some and take one for the team.
I always wanted those foodcubes from THX1138.

>> No.16623559

>>16623474
Thanks anon, gonna pick some up as an alternative to my usual post workout shake

>> No.16623575

>>16623552
>beef looks like a pancake

>> No.16623578
File: 489 KB, 890x874, Paolo commands you to eat the squares.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16623578

It's all made by swarthy Italians. Why no pasta cube?

>>16623542
CalorieMate is what I think Elven Lembas bread is

>> No.16623584

>biscuits
l-:
>boullion cubes
l-:
>meal in a cube
D-:<

children. get over yourselves

>> No.16623595

>>16623584
and idiots think slippery slope is a fallacy
just take the next logical step and inject soylent into your veins you golem

>> No.16623601
File: 1.09 MB, 1920x1080, Our assistants will deliver cubes right to your door or office..png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16623601

They have a YT video and it's pretty terrifying.

https://youtu.be/lTOVnWdVF8M

I wish I could make webms

>> No.16623605

>>16623601
https://gitgud.io/nixx/WebMConverter

>> No.16623615
File: 1.33 MB, 1920x1080, I&#039;m so happy you took me out for squares anon! .png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16623615

>>16623605
ty anon

>> No.16623659

>>16623578
Even with half his head not showing I can still tell he's a massive faggot.

>> No.16623684
File: 211 KB, 960x1454, bio-robot-refrigerator-gel.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16623684

>>16623474
>You WILL stick your food in the goo!
It's been how many years and I'm still fucking waiting.

>> No.16623699

>>16623659
I can tell you are a massive faggot by your post alone.

>> No.16623700

>>16623684
What happens during a power outage? Does the goo and the foodstuffs just kind of splorge on the floor?

>> No.16623709
File: 166 KB, 1920x1080, image-asset.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16623709

Why the fuck isn't there just readily available human kibble yet, making a nutrionally balanced food pellet you can just eat a bowl of with or without water is really fucking easy, and the idiots who drink soy sludge only drink soy sludge anyways so it's not like they will have a problem with eating the same food over and over again

>> No.16623710

>>16623700
We may never know...

>> No.16623717

>>16623709
I thought about this, but consider how all the soyfood ads portray their customers as young, hip, active, and outgoing. I couldn't possibly stoop low enough to not be honest about what it is, and what major retailer would stock: "Depression Food: for when you don't feel like dying, but don't care about living"?
I'm just not Jewish enough to be rich...

>> No.16623730

>>16623474
I checked their website and it's full of simple spelling, punctuation, and grammatical mistakes. They were more excited about their weird gimmick than they were about presenting themselves as a professional company.

>> No.16623732
File: 71 KB, 1280x720, thx1138.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16623732

>>16623709
In my experience the closest thing to human kibble are instant mashed potatoes and boxed cereal.
There are some stories about human slaves and the like being feed actual dog kibble.
I'd be down for human chow just so it helps keep my teeth shiny and clean.
And long haul space strips are in our radar now, those people need to eat something with out getting space madness.

>> No.16623739
File: 36 KB, 512x384, Malk.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16623739

>>16623730
It really has this Juicero vibe to it, it's scary how they want to market straight to hospitals, institutions(prisons), and schools, the very people who have no say in whether the food is shit or not.

>> No.16623743
File: 36 KB, 1080x1080, IMG_7219-shortbread-cookies.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16623743

>>16623542
isn't that just shortbread?

>> No.16623745

>>16623717
Just give it a stupid name like total nutrion meal and claim it's a food alternative for people who don't enjoy eating

>> No.16623748

>heh! i bet /ck/ hasn't heard this one yet..

>> No.16623753

>>16623732
You can get most of the nutrients you need to keep people healthy with milk, oatmeal, and potatoes so instant mashed potato could be a bulk of what the preformed pellets are

>> No.16623754
File: 443 KB, 1920x1025, 1920px-Veggie_Loaf.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16623754

>>16623717
Honestly not a terrible product idea, lots of people with depression struggle to eat properly, and a nutritionally balanced, easy to eat meal could help solve that issue.

>>16623732
There's also nutraloaf, served to prisoners.

>> No.16623769

>>16623754
The attempted meal replacements I've seen have failed pretty hard to image, nobody wants to chug soylent because of soybois, nobody wants these food squares because they look pompous and pretentious, but kibble, that's depressing enough to sate the masses as long as they don't make it 90% soy and advertise it using male feminists

>> No.16623774
File: 109 KB, 1002x1424, 1589716140296.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16623774

>>16623754
yeh I was about to add nutriloaf, but it really is too cruel of a foodstuff designed by evil chefs to make people feel sad, or at least hate jail and never want to go back again.

>> No.16623802

>>16623474
Can a resident autist explain what it is about this that warrants screeching and constant reposting of this shit?

>> No.16623805

>>16623802
Is this your first time seeing a viral advertising campaign here?

>> No.16623831

>>16623802
no fuck you

>> No.16623868

>>16623802
It's the right wing culture warriors. They are miffed or pretend to be miffed because somebody eats something or tries to do business.

>> No.16623913

>>16623868
So what's a left wing culture warrior?

>> No.16623919

>>16623913
The Taliban.

>> No.16623965

>>16623601
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gl7MRPWSw_M
But you guys shit on Liquid Death because it does actually exist. Okay...

>> No.16623970

>>16623965
The only goofy jewrube ad we like here on /ck/ is for 6PM. Real man hours.

>> No.16624019

>>16623868
you sound like you have a soylent subscription

>> No.16624020

>>16623802
its the globohomo agenda to eliminate freethink bro. yesterday some fags came to my apartment and forced me to order this square meal shit at gunpoint. they also made me eat a fistful of grasshoppers and they injected me with estrogen.

>> No.16624030

>>16624020
Based Chinabro. All hail the people's PRC.

>> No.16624390
File: 126 KB, 1280x720, spacefood.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16624390

I signed up for a trial order, no immediate response tho :/, I want my cubes.

>> No.16624398

>>16624390
on a scale of 1 to 10 how much are you into marvel

>> No.16624404

>>16624398
0 go project somewhere else jannylet