/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.16435028]

Do fancy cheeses scare anyone else?
I walked by this cheese place and I wanted to get something but it all looked weird and intimidating.

[Anonymous No.16435035]

It's been hard during the pandemic when you can't grab a piece and smell it

[Anonymous No.16435052]

>>16435028
No because I know what I like and what I don't. >Washed rind- Good
>Natural rind- Eh, it's alright but it depends on the aging
>Bloomy rind- No good
>Bloomy rind plus veins- Absolutely vile

[Anonymous No.16435456]

>>16435028
Buy one cheese
Buy some crackers and apples
Try the cheese

Repeat

[Anonymous No.16435457]

>>16435456
What kind of crackers and cheese?

[Anonymous No.16435464]

>>16435052
you like a stinky washed rind but don't like a creamy brie? huh

[Anonymous No.16435809]

>>16435028
the "grey owl" cheese is freaking me out

[Anonymous No.16435827]

>>16435028
Talk to the people behind the counter! Tell them what you like and they can make a good recommendation for a starting point.

>>16435809
Grey Owl is the shit. Try some if you have the chance.

[Anonymous No.16435843]

>>16435464
I don't like mold on my cheese, I think it ruins the cheese. I've eaten brie before but it's not something I would buy personally.

[Anonymous No.16435846]

>>16435456
Good advice.

[Anonymous No.16435871]

>>16435028
Just remind yourself that what you call "fancy cheese" is boring basic-ass cheese for some French guys, and they just eat it as a random snack at 1am.
So no reason to be intimidated.

[Anonymous No.16435885]

>>16435028
I love fancy cheeses. Really wish it wasn't so expensive to have a few slices, and I wish my friends were capable of appreciating it with me.

[Anonymous No.16436081]

>>16435028
>Have cheese carts pull up three times a week
>Just go to one of them
>"Today I like something mild/spicy/with herbs/soft/hard/Mediterranean/Bavarian/Swiss"
>They offer me a few things
>I try some small pieces
>"I don't like this, but I like this."
>I buy something I like
>I leave
It's not that hard, Anon

[Anonymous No.16436226]

>>16435028
The cheese doesn't scare me but the place does and it's because of the proprietor. They will instantly approach you and start talking about XYZ and you will feel stupid and inferior for not knowing a lot about cheese. Even if that isn't their intention, it's how you feel. Kind of like walking into a Gucci store or something like that and you know you're not the kind of person that can regularly shop at these stores and you feel like everyone can tell you don't belong there.

[Anonymous No.16436234]

>>16435028
where did you take this photograph?

[Anonymous No.16436406]

>>16436081
This. Not certain you have to wheel in a cart unless you plan to buy half the place, but just tell them you'd like to try something new, say if you prefer hard/soft/creamy, etc.; tell them what your favorites are, and they'll be glad to make a recommendation. Don't be afraid to say you don't know alot.
Remember, they wouldn't be running a cheese shop if they didn't love cheese and recommending some to others.

[Anonymous No.16436445]

>>16435028
Just tell them you don't know what the fuck you're doing and they'll let you try some and offer recommendations. That's what they're there for.

[Anonymous No.16436499]

>>16435457
any kind. look at the cheese, smell it, if it seems interesting buy a small piece (a lot of places will have a cheap bin with small pieces). blues will often go well with sweet fruits/honey/preserves, hard cheeses with some cured meat or mustard, but these aren't hard and fast rules. the best way to figure this out is to buy random shit every once in a while and see what's good

best of luck, op. cheese can be intimidating like wine, but the whole point of both is just to follow what tastes good to you, so just start eating

[Anonymous No.16436508]

The cheese doesn't, but the price does.

[Anonymous No.16436524]

>>16435457
Develop a theory. Ex: I think a blue cheese might go well with hearty whole grain crackers and a sweet apple (eg honeycrisp). Test your theory. Or: I think this stinky semi-soft washed rind cheese might go well with some lighter, more delicate cracker and some cured meat. Or maybe something might go with marmalade or honey or both and pear or granny smith apples or black pepper or whatever. If you approach it from a first-principles way, you’ll get an intuitive understanding. Then when you read other people’s pairings, you can spot genius ideas while ignoring 90% of the internet. For example, I stumbled across an aged manchego, cherry, pistachio salad idea with 10 year balsamic and sherry vinegar and because I’d fumbled around with aged manchego, I thought “fucking brilliant” and it turned out to be. But for every one of those there is 99 of some faggot just dumping manchego of some “family” recipe from NJ.

[Anonymous No.16436543]

>>16436406
I think they meant that the market they go to has a cheese vendors coming in 3 times a week selling out of a cart.

[Anonymous No.16437581]

>>16436406
I meant this >>16436543 desu
I never buy more than 400g since I live alone. They usually last for two weeks so no hurry.

[Anonymous No.16437660]

>>16435028
ask for a sample if you want to know without buying it first

[Anonymous No.16437681]

>>16435843
if you think brie is moldy you should try roquefort
strongest shit on the market

[Anonymous No.16437716]

>>16435028
Grey owl looks like my scale encrusted cum sock I kept on the floor next to my computer as a teen

[Anonymous No.16437722]

>>16435028
>Do fancy cheeses scare anyone else?
Not really. Once you understand that there are some basic themes and most cheese are variations on these themes. The vast number of different types can be overpowering but over the time you will learn they aren’t that different after all. The most known types are usually the best, hidden gems are rare.
What matters more is getting a good quality and understanding how to eat it properly. I.e., put it out of the fridge for some time, cut it in slices starting at the heart and going to the rind, serve it with bread some fruits and nuts.

[Anonymous No.16437731]

>>16437722
>hidden gems are rare.
I would disagree with that once you get up to speed. Perhaps the entire reason to do it in the first place is to stumble upon a certified gem out of nowhere and just be blown away.

[Anonymous No.16437776]

>>16437731
I am not disagreeing on gems existing and that they are worth to seek out. But that is the level of the advanced cheese connoisseur seeking out novelty. The main point is enjoying good cheese. In my eyes there is so much variation in more known cheeses you don’t even need to seek out new types, though it is fun. People sometimes get carried away and confuse obscurity with quality. Usually the point there cheese snobbism starts.

[Anonymous No.16437782]

>>16437776
fair point

[Anonymous No.16437795]

>>16437716
>lu lu le edgy and kewl
OxyContin should have wiped you out.

[Anonymous No.16437797]

>>16437681
I've also eaten roquefort before. The cheese itself is alright, nice aroma and texture but when I hit a vein or a piece of bloom, the mold/spicy flavor kinda turns me off. I don't hate it but it's too funky for my taste.

[Anonymous No.16437799]

>>16437795
Did someone touch you as a child anon?

[Anonymous No.16437804]

>>16437799
Quit projecting, cumsock.

[Anonymous No.16437887]

>>16435028
I've got some fancy dick cheese for you.

[Anonymous No.16437895]

>>16437804
I wish….

[Anonymous No.16437921]

>>16436081
>It's not that hard, Anon
Oh don't give that line.
It's like this whole fucking world just assumes that because you can hold a job and have the ability to go into stores, that it isn't a struggle to be understood. The process you just outlined is much worse than just not buying the cheese at all, or buying it and trying it at home.

I'm not a normie - my presence, gait, and stuttering speech generally makes people unsetttled. And that's after years of speech practice.
I also tend to speak in the same manner as I type, so I generally have to repeatedly explain the same idea with different wording several times to get the idea across, which tends to irritate others despite my clearly being amicable. The best way I've found to not waste people's time is to just point and say "that, please."

[Anonymous No.16438184]

Camembert is the first bloomy rind cheese I've tried.
I don't like on its own, but it goes great in a salad with some olive oil.

[Anonymous No.16438259]

>>16438184
your cheese looks over ripped
I'd never eat a camembert this yellow
Maybe it's the phone lens idk

[Anonymous No.16438266]

>>16435871
I'd rather not think about French people at all, thank you.

[Anonymous No.16438273]

>>16436226
Except with the cheese shop person, they really want to share the world of cheese with you. The Gucci wage slave just want to feel better than you.

[Anonymous No.16438690]

>>16438259
>smells sour
>tastes bitter
I think people should try Brie first.

[Anonymous No.16438817]

>>16437921
huh?

[Anonymous No.16438825]

>>16438817
What he describes as easy is only easy for normies.
Not necessarily a takedown on normies, more power to them, but assuming that on /ck/ is useless.

[Anonymous No.16439354]

>>16437921
I was a weird autistic fuck too when I was 20 desu
Just gotta train a bit in real life, Anon. Stop giving a fuck and smile. The two most important things.

[Anonymous No.16439366]

>>16435028
I doubt it costs a lot of money to make cheese yet you can sell this stuff at a high price. I should get into the cheese making business and make bank.

[Anonymous No.16439374]

>>16437921
You know the answer.

[Anonymous No.16439436]

>>16438273
and then they ply their wares on you but you don't notice any of the subtleties they're talking about, it all just taste "like cheese" and you're not even sure if you like it or what to do with it if you buy it but you've come to far now so you buy something mild and some crackers and forget about it in your fridge for a month
rinse and repeat

[Anonymous No.16439454]

>>16435028
Why does the cheese look like an old man's scrotum?

[Anonymous No.16439513]

>>16439366
Some of that price is the shipping cost to import, or the cost to hold in inventory. What you want to look at is the price for the cheeses at your local farmer's market. And then see how many gallons of milk go into each pound of cheese.

[Anonymous No.16439518]

>>16435028
All those "specialty" cheeses are a meme and are all gross as af. Just go to the deli and get some gouda or chedder or something. Hell american slices are better.

[Anonymous No.16439531]

>>16435456
Get a baguette instead of crackers

[Anonymous No.16439534]

>>16437921
Can you repeat that please?

[Anonymous No.16440205]

>>16439354
>Stop giving a fuck and smile.
I have not smiled since I was at least 22, oddly enough.
I do not smile when I laugh, only when I am nervous.
Someone yelling in my face accusing me of things? Big ol' teethy smile.

I'll let you guess how that goes.

[Anonymous No.16440238]

imagine being scared of cheese lmao

[Anonymous No.16440366]

>>16438259
the camembert is fine

[Anonymous No.16440376]

>>16437921
You sound sincerely autistic.

[Anonymous No.16440380]

>>16440205
>Someone yelling in my face accusing me of things? Big ol' teethy smile.
Oh hey, me too.

[Anonymous No.16440398]

>>16435028
are amerimutts really frightened by real cheese

[Anonymous No.16440403]

>>16440376
I most likely am, though I am only diagnosed with ADD.
Doesn't really mitigate my point. Out of all places, people on /ck/ are not assumed to have at least a few screws loose?

[Anonymous No.16441311]

>>16437795
Who hurt you chud

[Anonymous No.16441321]

>>16436234
Definitely a whole foods

[Anonymous No.16441333]

>>16435028
yes OP I am scared of cheese as well

[Anonymous No.16441538]

>>16435028
Nah, it's the most overrated thing you can think of.

It's all just aged curds.

There's 7 layers of self-aggrandizing autism around it because "muh designation of origin" or because a silly european rotates the cheese 60 degrees instead of 30

There's only 4 categories of cheese: fresh, brie, bleu, and everything else (aka cheddar-like)

[Anonymous No.16441744]

>>16440205
>>16440380
That's unironically ape behavior

[Anonymous No.16442660]

>>16440403
>at least a few screws loose
From your posts it's clear you have no screws to even be loose bro
That being said... People at stores get paid precisely to put up with miserable sons of bitches like yourself. It's their problem, not yours

[Anonymous No.16442745]

>>16436234
looks like a kroger

[Anonymous No.16442931]

>>16437795
You mad, n*g?

[Anonymous No.16443695]

>>16435028
>intimidating.
i shy away but only because they're expensive and i don't want to waste $12 on something that sucks

[Anonymous No.16443731]

>>16439436
>but you don't notice any of the subtleties they're talking about, it all just taste "like cheese"

Maybe if you dont have a tongue this would be the case, but the world of cheese is too vast for everything to taste the same. the difference between a washed rind cheese and a bloomy rind is not subtle.

this isnt wine that we're talking about here, where all of the flavor differences are straight bullshit

[Anonymous No.16443789]

I don't even know what people do with the fancy cheese. Like how do you eat it?

[Anonymous No.16444463]

>>16443789
On crackers with some cured meats or fruits.

[Anonymous No.16444481]

>>16441538
Nice b8y m8y

[Anonymous No.16446097]

>>16437921
>>16440205
It's always the supposedly shy and awkward types that fucking go on and on about themselves in unrelated threads.

[Anonymous No.16446148]

>>16437921
Try to go to a cheese store when it's quiet, so they have the time for you. They are there to give you advise.

[Anonymous No.16446178]

>>16438184
>>16438259
It looks good.
Camembert needs to be a bit liquid so you can spread it on a piece of bread.

[Anonymous No.16446186]

>>16435028
This nigger afraid of cheeze!

[Anonymous No.16446204]

>>16438259
Good Camembert is supposed to be running. Do you eat it straight out of the fridge?

[Anonymous No.16446362]

>>16446097
Because this is where they go to get some sense of socializing.
Annoying as it is, that's the best cope they have going for them.

[Anonymous No.16447111]

>>16435028
hello autist, here is what you do: face the person behind the counter and say "i want to try something new but there are so many cheeses i really don't know where to start", they will say something back, you are now having a conversation about cheese and will end up walking out of the cheese shoppe with some new cheese that you have never tried before. good luck!

[Anonymous No.16448068]

>>16446204
How do you catch it?

[Anonymous No.16449120]

>>16435028
Impressing the store clerk is the least of a well bred man's concerns. Just ask them what the perfect meal is for each cheese and then go for it.

[Anonymous No.16449136]

>>16437921
I didn't quite catch that. Would you mind?

[Anonymous No.16449238]

>>16438184
if i bit into that and didn't taste entenmens' bavarian cream i would barf for 30 minutes straight.

[Anonymous No.16449240]

>>16435871
maybe the whole stinky french thing had nothing to do with hygiene and was rancid cheese farts all along.

[Anonymous No.16449250]

>>16449238
Basically a pretty bitter and salty cheese with a stronger umami taste than what I find in most other cheeses, with a mildly runny texture at room temperature.
When I mix it into my salad with olive oil and let it sit 30min-1hr (all ingredients from fridge), the consistency is more like a dressing than a piece of cheese.

I don't particularly care for it on its own, actually, and it doesn't go good with meats/crackers.

[Anonymous No.16449251]

>>16441538
>he doesn't understand terroir

[Anonymous No.16449261]

>>16435035
fpbp, my nosebrother

[Anonymous No.16449285]

>>16446097
on an anonymous board, no less.

[Anonymous No.16449301]

>>16447111
trips of truth

[Anonymous No.16449307]

>>16449250
i was right! but i'll also remember that for when i ever prepare a salad an hour in advance.

[Anonymous No.16449349]

>>16444481
describe the cheddaring process

[Anonymous No.16449602]

>>16435035
Another man of culture, I see...

[Anonymous No.16449771]

>>16435843
No it doesn't ruin the cheese faggot. It imparts unique characteristics to it. You're just a pussy.

[Anonymous No.16450116]

>>16437921
you think people give a shit but really they dont.
also people likely understood you the first time, or if they didnt it's because you were speaking too softly.
the people being "unsettled" is cuz there's some fa/tg/guy that hasnt showered in a week repeating himself 3 or 4 times and not just shutting up and getting on with the transaction.

protip: you dont need to speak at all at the supermarket. just pretend you're deaf or foreign, or better yet just put headphones on.

grab cheese you want or buy one of those sample pack platter things.
throw it in the basket.
go to check-out
swipe your card and leave.

no autism required.

[Anonymous No.16450122]

>>16446097
this
>hey guys, cheese is pretty cool ey
>yeah man, i like X
>yeah Y is pretty bangin'
>Z is good, but with some honey drizzled on it
>WAAH TALKING TO PEOPLE IS HARD BECAUSE I HAVE BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH OFF TOPIC POST FUCK YOU
>the thread
autistic faggots need to realise that 99% of the time no-one fucking notices or cares, but they're so trapped inside their own heads and too busy writing scripts of what they're gunna say to the pizza guy that they're not living in the current moment.
they're too busy asking themselves "What if?"

[Anonymous No.16450126]

>>16446204
aussie here
it has to be kept in the fridge and eaten straight out of the fridge or else it's literally yellow water.

[Anonymous No.16450131]

>>16435028
is this america?
I thought you couldn't import european unpasteurised cheeses

[Anonymous No.16450244]

>>16450126
Quiet down, the adults are talking.

[Anonymous No.16450247]

>>16435809
Grey owl is really good