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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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File: 152 KB, 1764x1169, hotsauce.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16089589 No.16089589 [Reply] [Original]

itt hot sauce stories
>Be me
>Get a super spicy hot sauce, pull out a toothpick and put it onto my tounge
>Ohshit.mp3
>Run outside and get a hose, spray it into my mouth and squirm around
>My neighbour thinks something serious has happened and calls 000
>They arive talk for a bit and realise nothing weird was going on
>My neighbour hates me for weeks and says im responsible because of her fine for her non emergency police call

>> No.16089607

What the fuck is wrong with you

>> No.16089612

>>16089589
Hello retarded Australian

>> No.16089626

Tried El Yucateco and it was underwhelming. It's hot but given their obnoxious label "XXXTRA HOT" I figured it would be a lot hotter. Flavor is pretty good, I like that it's not too vinegary.

>> No.16089629

>>16089589
I really like Sriracha, like I'm addicted to it. I started off with it on usual suspects like noodles & eggs and have been hooked ever since. I'll put it on anything savoury, even expensive cheeses or crisps (chips).

>> No.16089646

>>16089589
what do you even do with a hot sauce like that? kitchen decoration?

>> No.16090313

>>16089629
I love super spicy sauces,but sriracha remains a favorite.

>> No.16090619
File: 87 KB, 388x388, hotsoy36.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16090619

>>16089589
>be me
>wake up at heckin' 6 in the morningrino to let the heckin' good boi pupperino pooperino
>remember that I left my heckin' hot saucerino collectarino out last night
>enter the heckin' kitchenrino, heckin' hot saucerino is heckin' EVERYWHEREINO
>bottles of sriracharino, cholularino, heckin' varkerino all torn openrino
>follow saucerino trail to the bathroomrino
>heckin 'pupperino is laying in a HECKIN' MASSIVE puddle of diarrhino
>smells kinda like secret aardvarkerino
>mfw

>> No.16090823

>>16089589
>>16089589
This isn’t a hot sauce story but it’s close enough:

>be me
>mincing habaneros for a stir fry
>friend comes over so I take a break and we’re chilling on the couch
>conversation turns to girls and after a few minutes I notice he’s getting hard since he’s wearing basketball shorts
>he sees me looking and then pulls down his waistband and pops out his dick
>at this point I’m diamonds so I do the same
>he climbs on top of me and presses his dick against mine and starts grinding them together
>I grab both of our cocks together and start jerking them
>suddenly start to feel a painful burning sensation
>he feels it too
>oh fuck, the habaneros
>the pain keeps increasing but we don’t stop because it feels too good
>finally cum all over each other’s shafts in a mixture of pleasure and pain
>immediately run to the shower to run cold water over our cocks

Ever since then I always wear gloves when handling hot peppers

>> No.16090839

>>16089589
eating hot sauce is not a hobby

>> No.16090876
File: 1.94 MB, 1080x1080, 1495776196972.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16090876

>>16089589
>friends come over
>marvel at my hot sauce collection
>everyone gets a little tipsy
>friends keep asking to try it
>set up a "hot ones" lineup
>use tofu (I'm vegan) instead of wings
>no milk (I'm vegan), only almond milk
>they dare me to go first
>get nervous because I don't actually use my hottest sauces (they're just there for show)
>eat the first bite with Frank's Red Hot, starting to sweat
>move on to Tabasco - hype myself up and eat it
>almost die but I hang on
>next up is the meme sauce from the Hot Ones show
>feel brave and take a bite
>throat closes up and I can't breathe
>fall to the floor and all my friend's laughing
>feel my bowels give way, I begin to shit my pants with fiery-hot diarrhea
>friends stop laughing and just stare
>I'm still convulsing and shitting myself, just getting small gasps of air in between
>finally vomit and stop shitting
>friends leave and never talk to me again
>wash up and rearrange my hot sauce collection all nicely again
>they were just scared of some spice, unlike me, a real man

>> No.16090980

>>16089626
honestly all hotsauce should be more about the flavor than the heat

>> No.16090988

>>16090980
agreed. if you want heat, just add some peppers or pepper extract

>> No.16091016

>>16089589
man these threads are the worst.

>> No.16091062

>>16089589
Couldn't have she asked first, a little of concern?

>> No.16091090
File: 111 KB, 1024x878, 1612808063368.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16091090

>>16089589
the one on the left taste way to much like old garlic, i disposed of the rest.

>> No.16092472
File: 46 KB, 430x659, 1216__41829.1560486025.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
16092472

Not super hot, but this is it.

>> No.16092686

>>16090619
>>16090876
uhhhhh hello, based department? your gonna wanna see this...

>> No.16092700

>fined
>for calling the emergency number
What kind of shit-hole do you live in? In America they charge patients $2,000 to ride an ambulance but.i have never heard.ofngetting charged for calling 911.

>> No.16092707

>>16090823
Where can I find a friend like this?

>> No.16092733

>>16089589
>having female neighbors

>>16090619
Infuriating. Well done.

>>16090823
Disgusting and retarded.

>>16090876
Well meme’d friend.

>> No.16094154

>>16089589
Valentina is hella delicious