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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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15758778 No.15758778 [Reply] [Original]

i cant fucking understand why there are 100 different coffee drinks. some of these are retarded, like cafe americano and lungo. why would you want to dilute your espresso with plain water? why not just order a non-espresso coffee? what the fuck? look at this chart. there are four different drinks which are just espresso diluted with varying amounts of water. kill yourself if you actually order a ""palazzo""

>> No.15758790

Because the guy you're ordering from has an espresso machine, not a "non-espresso coffee" machine

>> No.15758797
File: 35 KB, 670x480, 361.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15758797

>>15758778
>NOOOO NOT MY HECKIN COFFERINOOOO NOOO YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO DRINK IT LIKE THAT MWA MWA

>> No.15758818

>>15758778
Why is there hot water in the simple espresso?

>> No.15758821

>>15758790
ok cool so make a fucking espresso and then put milk and shit in it as you want. nobody, at least no fatass american is going to ever be able to truly taste a difference between an espresso shot, a ristretto shot, a doppio, a long shot, an anal shot, and whatever other faggy hipster faggot types of shots there are. It’s fucking ground up beans that are soaked in water. There is no need for all of these names for very specific preparations.
ive never even seen most of these things, who puts lemon in their espresso that sounds disgusting

>> No.15758825

>>15758821
i dont know why im cursing so much, i think im really tired, sorry to the person i was replying to

>> No.15758829

>>15758778
The best is missing: caffè corretto

>> No.15758839

>>15758778
OP I think the real problem is that infographic was made by an idiot.

>> No.15758840

Imagine being this triggered by variety

>> No.15758841

>>15758818

obviously, espresso is made from espresso and water 1:1
duh

>> No.15758917

>>15758778
>Turkish coffee
>instant
Why would you make an infographic if you have no idea what you're talking about?

>> No.15758918

>>15758778
>turkish coffee
>hot water
>instant coffee
Is this a throll chart or do americans really?

>> No.15758924

Italians can't into coffee, that's why they queued for miles when Starbucks arrived in their country. They finally got the chance to taste some quality coffee.

>> No.15758937
File: 471 KB, 2062x2646, 3AC85F20-4DCA-4F47-82E6-629DEDFCE987.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15758937

>>15758917
>>15758918
i dont know why you care about turkish coffee so much but heres a different one

fuck turkish coffee btw im never gonna order that shit ever whats the point

>> No.15758940

>>15758924
true dat

>> No.15758944

>>15758778
>why would people create new variations of coffee
>why don't you just stick to one simple basic thing
>why do civilizations and societies create things unique to themselves
>Why do people have to be different
boggles the mind anon

>> No.15758949

>>15758944
xd boggles the mind when im clearly referring to the needless names for very specific types of coffee. obviously everyone likes their coffee differently and coming up with new types of drinks is cool but “espresso” versus “doppio” should bot be a thing. doppio should just be called what it is. two shots of espresso. no one is going to taste the fucking difference anyway. no go boggle off back to redd!t

>> No.15758968
File: 16 KB, 200x356, AIEEEEEEEEEEE I KNEEL.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15758968

>think coffeefags are just snobbish hipsters
>try sinfully expensive specialty beans or whatever the fuck it is
>it actually tastes like chocolate, apple, blackcurrent and all the other shit they print on the bags
>understand what the complexity they're always blabbering about is
Coffeechads... I KNEEL

>> No.15758970

>>15758949
Anon stop being triggered by names I know your autistic reject brain is rotten and gets hysterical at everything but try to control yourself. Doppio literally me as double in Italian, do you get it now anon? Do you get why Italians would just say 'double' instead of 'two shots of expresso'
Please get a vasectomy before you spread your autistic to genes please

>> No.15758976

>>15758970
I meant espresso lmao but anyway you get it

>> No.15758977

>>15758778
Who even cares for that shit? Black coffee or espresso is all you need unless you're a child.

>> No.15758992

>>15758977
t. I CONSOOM THEREFORE I REAL MAN

>> No.15758995

>>15758937
lmao wtf is that chart

>> No.15759004

>>15758840
I'm triggered by what my espresso machine and I just fucked up / conspired to create.

I didn't tighten the filter back up quite tight enough, and I must have knocked my grinder over a notch at some point. I was going for a half-assed cuban (demerara on top of the coffee in the head), but what I wound up with is vaguely turkish, with a bullseye pattern from where the basket was clogging and releasing. It's pretty alright. Does such a thing already exist or am I off to look up Italian terms for archery, darts, and cockroaches?

>> No.15759098

>>15758970
>>15758976
if you’re speaking english then why would you say doppio instead of just “double espresso” its dumb and pretentious
>lmao
leave.

>> No.15759107

>>15759098
If you're speaking English, you could order a "Double". It's implied that you're asking for espresso.

>> No.15759134

>>15758778
Americanos are amazing. They have a different flavor than normal coffee. Fucking tastelet

>> No.15759153

>>15759098
Doppio is universally understood by baristas and shorter to say than 'two shots of espresso'. Lmao.

>> No.15759154

>>15759098
>WE SPEAK AMERICAN HERE
kek

>> No.15759159

>>15759098
>pretentious
You really don’t know what that word means.

>> No.15759171

>>15759159
its annoying* :)

>> No.15759174

>>15759134
This. Yuropoors like their coffee thicc just like they like black men's cum dripping from their wives.

>> No.15759180

>>15759171
Nobody finds it annoying other than autistic rejects like yourself anon

>> No.15759238
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15759238

>>15758778
I use this it's great, best drip I have used so far. Temp when tested was 202.5 center to outer 199.5 for the basket. Still tastes better but not as much as a jump from using shitty maxwell to grinding your own, ever a mr. Coffee can make a good cup with a burr grinder.

>> No.15759256

>>15759238
Fucking phone

>> No.15759614

>>15759180
yeah keep calling me an autistic reject because i dont order doppio companio americano starbuckinis with extra vanilla creme jizz on top like enlightened individuals such as yourself

>> No.15759626

>>15759174
>mutts law
Can’t help it can you?

>> No.15759648

>>15759614
suit yourself, my luddite clone... but seriously, you can just order a double.

>> No.15759662

>>15758778
>why would you want to dilute your espresso with plain water? why not just order a non-espresso coffee? what the fuck?
cafe americano dates to WWI, American soldiers would order espresso and put hot water in it because they didn't have regular drip coffee

>> No.15759704

>>15759098
>duuuuur why call it a tsunami just call it a BIG WAVE

>> No.15759799

>>15758778
By is the definition of espresso circular definable? That's not what Turkish coffee is. I want to murder the person who made this

>> No.15759826

>>15759614
I find funny how the word doppio sent you into such an autistic seething fit

>> No.15759831

>>15758778
Americano and Lungo is pure evil.

>> No.15760524

>>15758778
as far as I'm concerned, there's only two types of coffee. black coffee (for men) and gay coffee (for fags)

>> No.15760545

>>15758778
>hurr durr why dilute espresso with water
>hurr durr why dilute espresso with milk
>hurr durr why dilute X with Y
Fuck off retard

>> No.15760550

>>15759004
>a bullseye pattern
You just made the soyboy coin slot my dude

>> No.15760700

>>15759159
Well if you use a word from another language you're probably going to pronounce it wrong or sound like you're trying hard to pronounce it correctly, which does sound pretentious.

>> No.15760715

shot in the dark (red eye) is the king though I used to get it with too shots and it seems thats apparently a dark eye. If they dont french press your coffee then just shit on the floor when you leave imo

>> No.15761122

>>15760524
you know most of the coffee OP posted is black coffee prepared different ways right?

>> No.15761681

>>15759826
it didnt though. stop projecting holy shit.

>> No.15761973

>>15758778
>image made by someone who doesn't know how to make turkish coffee

>> No.15762012

>>15758778
I am usually a tea drinker...but if doing coffee, I like a candied-coffee like a mochaccino or an irish coffee.

>> No.15763408

>>15758918
>"turkish"
>"do americans really?"
the retardation

>> No.15763454

>>15759098
>t. literal retard

>> No.15763692

>>15758778
You're on a cooking board and you don't understand why people combine ingredients to produce something new?

>> No.15763714

>>15761681
>>15758825
Shut the fuck up you stupid faggot. Jesus Christ, honestly kill yourself you pathetic fucking loser.

>> No.15763993

>>15758968
underrated

>> No.15764292
File: 1.69 MB, 1500x934, file.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15764292

i cant fucking understand why there are 100,000 different chocolates. some of these are retarded, like butterfinger and white "chocolate" reeses. why would you want to dilute your chocolat with vanilla and a lack of chocolate? why not just purchase a hershey bar? what the fuck? look at this chart. there are six different chocolates which are just chocolate diluted with varying amounts of nougat. kill yourself if you actually buy a ""milky way""

>> No.15764824

>>15758778
>Irish coffee is coffee and whiskey
My sides

>> No.15764840

>>15758778
>i cant fucking understand
This does not surprise me.

>> No.15765525

>>15764292
it's almost like different people like different things. I know, your mind is probably blown.

>> No.15765551

>>15764292
10 is the patrician's choice

>> No.15765563

>>15758790
Six of the drinks depicted use non espresso coffee.

>> No.15765576

>>15758840
Variety is fucking horrible and unnecessary.
Ever bought someone a birthday card?

>> No.15765584

>>15765576
Fuck off commie

>> No.15765594

>>15764292
Cool straw man argument.

>> No.15765603

>>15763714
cry

>> No.15766036

>>15764292
For me, it's 1, 10 and 22.

>> No.15767223
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15767223

>>15758778
>shakeratto
What coffee would MS drink?

>> No.15767519

coffee tastes like fucking shit

>> No.15767557

>>15758841
so if espresso = espresso + water
then espresso = (espresso + water) + water
its recursive and approaches just water

>> No.15767595

>>15758937
based coffee chart with proto-germanic reconstructed language information

>> No.15768919

>>15763408
Are Americans really as dumb as this guy?

>> No.15768969

>>15767519
Fuck off to your gummy bear general or something, you toddler-palated dork.

>> No.15769366

>>15768919
Yes, they are. It's unfortunate really but some day they're just going to have to be put down.