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>>15459511The surly egg man will be forever surly.
these threads are always chock-full of redditorsgod i wish we could reclaim this website back...im so fucking sick of shit like this being posted but the second i make roasted duck for my cute boyfriend (im trans) people bombard the thread with transphobic comments
>>15459525Fuck off tranny
>>15459511how does he get out?
>>15459511How does he get out of there without breaking the eggs?
>>15459648>>15459664He has to cook ALL the eggs
>>15459511How many egg sammies he made in his life /ck/? I'd wager in the 10s of thousands
>>15459556This gentlemen, is what a whore looks like, and god forbid anyone suggest to her that she should wear something else.
>>15459763>10s of thousandsAt least!
I was going to post OC in this thread, but you decided to start it with le fucking meme egg man, so now I won't.
>>15459556Yeah, I want to eat that
>>15460292cool i dont care i just wanted to post the egg man it doesnt matter to me at all what you do or dont do
>>15459923Looks like mandatory uniform.
>>15459511i've always wondered what it's like to have a job like this. the only food related job i've had is when i was a glazer at honey baked ham for a couple of months during the holidays. it was neat, it makes me want to do something else cooking related but all of my job experience is industrial and i'll probably be forever relegated to being a welder because nobody wants to hire you for a job unless you have experience in that job.
>>15460199conceptualize the aroma
>>15459511There he is. There he goes again. Look, everyone! He posted it once again! Isn't he just the funniest guy around?! Oh my God.I can almost see your pathetic overweight frame glowing in the dark, lit by your computer screen which is the only source of light in your room, giggling like a like girl as you once again type your little Egg Fort thread up and fill in the captcha. Or maybe you don't even fill in the captcha. Maybe you're such a disgusting NEET that you actually paid for a 4chan pass, so you just choose the webm. Oh, and we all know the picture. The "epic" Surly King guy, isn't it? I imagine you little shit laughing so hard as you click it that you drop your greasy egg sandwich on the floor, but it's ok, your mother will clean it up in the morning. Oh, that's right. Did I fail to mention? You live with your mother. You are a fat fucking fuckup, she's probably so sick of you already. So sick of having to do everything for you all goddamn day, every day, for a grown man who spends all his time on 4chan posting about eggs. Just imagine this. She had you, and then she thought you were gonna be a scientist or an astronaut or something grand, and then you became a NEET. A pathetic Eggfag NEET. She probably cries herself to sleep everyday thinking about how bad it is and how she wishes she could just disappear. She can't even try to talk with you because all you say is "HOW DOES HE GET OUT WITHOUT BREAKING THE EGGS?" You've become a parody of your own self. And that's all you are. A sad little man laughing in the dark by himself as he prepares to indulge in the same old dance that he's done a million times now. And that's all you'll ever be.
>>15459923she's free to fress however she wants
anyone has that webm of the hot girl cooking
>>15460942Whores will be whores, that's true.
>>15459511i think about the surly egg king a lot whenever he's posted. how do you think he would react knowing a bunch of fat virgins were posting about him on a Chinese cartoon image board? what is he doing these days assuming he's not already dead from the rona? why is he so upset?
>>15460981>why is he so upset?You would be upset too if you were stuck at work trying to cook all the eggs so you can go home, only to be paid under minimum wage
>>15460977stop being an incel and go out sometimes
>>15459923Dude she works at a footlocker Isn't that punishment enough?
>>15460199smells like puke
>>15462001it looks like a weeping scab
>>15462007Finger removing tutorial.
>>15462007She's going to cut herself horribly
>>15462046that knife is probably duller than a butter knife.
>>15459511All my food related webm's are from Africa and Asia and involve cannabalism, infantcide, puppers, etc.
>>15462144i've never made meatloaf before but i'm pretty sure you're supposed to mix the egg with the meat while it's all raw, and if you want a crust you should make an actual dough for the crust like you do with beef wellington and then cook the whole thing together from raw to cooked in the oven
>>154595110:04 watch as he selects the perfect egg
>>15459664Are you fucking retarded?
>>15462428at least it all stayed in one piece. i don't think i could flip a piece of fish that big without it looking clumsy like that
>>15462455Breh, just use the full length of the tongs, grab and flip. It's not difficult
>>15462464i guess you could do that but my assumption is that since the tongs are so narrow compared to the rest of the steak, the sides would be unsupported and it could break in half lengthwise.
>>15462482If youre going to flip it a la retarded Jack at least leave the tongs open a bit for more surface area support.
>>15462007Now I get why there's no sharp knives in the Scalfani's house.
>>15459511Post the virgin no customer guy next to him
>>15463075A dull knife is more dangerous than a sharp knife. You can still cut yourself with all but the dullest dull knife but with a dull knife you're going to be trying harder to cut things so you'll be putting more force behind the blade which makes it more likely to slip and cut yourself.
>>15459511this man revolutionized my breakfast routine
>>15462424I wish there were lots of women like this. I don't have enough value to compete for this rare form of womanhood as a wife.
>>15460199I've been to this pizzeria and it's actually very good
>>15463096>the dead arm flailing
>>15463330That was before the stroke
>>15463334Its clearly post-stroke. You can see how its just hanging there awkwardly before he does it
>>15459544how does he get in?
>>15459511The Surly King and the team are back in action on friday vs /n/ in the winter cup at ca.17:40 UTC!
>>15463423>Discord CupGo back to your containment board.
>>15462424I want to be that tomato
>>15463424what the fuck that's disgusting
>>15462523>>15463330>>15463334>>15463336Does he even attend physical therapy?
>>15463436not surebut he mostly does "prayer therapy"
>>15463436No, he's a lazy moron. Physiotherapy would probably allow him to use his arm, but I bet he uses that to bother his wife with his videos and get sympathy views.
>>15463436Yes. It's called prayer.
>>15463326What did the pizza smell like?
>>15461988i've eaten this beforeit is not ground beef, it's finely shredded and full of arteries and stuff
>>15463424yeah baby slap it again
>>15463470what is that? fuck off with that shit
>>15460199Me sniffing my gf's feet&ass
>>15463661This is fine, but don't carefully rinse out the cavity first because that spreads germs.
>>15463563god i wish that were me
>>15462424>She looks like a goddess. That combination of beauty and strength is very thrilling.
>>15461988that is the stuff they give out at food banks, I have some, its actually not bad.
>>15462172yeah no shit sherlock there is a reason why this webm was posted
>>15463431>>15463553Its called a geoduck, lives in the ocean or some shit. Also, Chinese bugmen being bugmen.
>>15463431>>15463553its a garloid
>>15464524That wouldn't explain why she's still standing though
>>15463436He did at first but quit after a few weeks because he's cheap and lazy
>>15464140These are so cool, I want to know more
>>15465138this is taken from the 4Chn cup a simulated PES tournament where teams representing the boards face each other.check https://implyingrigged.info/wiki/FAQfor more info and https://implyingrigged.info/wiki//ck/for info on our team.on friday and sunday this weekend /ck/ has matches in the winter elite cup you can find out where it is streamed on the wiki page
>>15459620Is he enforcing the eating of mcdonalds or did this person steal soda?I cannot tell.
>>15459525You know this post is autistic when you complain about redditors, pretend you're a oldfag and then for no fucking reason feel the need to flex about your "boyfriend" and say you're trans. Redditors are literally more accepting of you mentally fucked retards than 4chan ever will be, we know your degenerates, we know you're mentally fucked people and we hate you because of shit like this.Fuck off our cooking board you fucking waste of human life.
>>15459525i love 4chan (i'm trans) and I have a boyfriend (i'm trans btw) but I hate all these newfags (trans here)
>>15465220epic transguin of death xDDDD i am so queeer
>>15465180They need to include ja/ck/
>>15463330he was one of the most badass characters in final fantasy
>>15463563that's how she aborts her babies too.
>>15461988give tushonka a try if you are ever at a russian store, can be kinda tasty
>>15463436Excuse me, but do you even believe in the love of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ?
>>15465408we already do. he is a starting 11 player
>>15459525>>15465220i love bait and im trans too
>>15459511everytime I watch this I notice more technique. certified egg lord
>>15460199>pizza smellcracks me up everytime
>>15467057>throw eggs in pan>wait>Put on breadWow much skill. Instead of shit posting, how about we post some real egg techniques?
>>15467072>gordon ramsy's runny-ass "scrambled eggs"no thanks. if i wanted egg custard for breakfast, id have egg custard.
>>15467072That looks like slush
>>15465180who the fuck wrote all this shit in this website ? 4cup isn't supposed to be rigged and occupied by discord faggots ?
>>15467072there's a lot more going on. I won't explain it to a pleb like you
>>15467072>scrambled eggs, undercooked and slimy >just perfect
>>15462100I fail to see the issue
>>15466759where's my mark wiens player faggot
>>15459511Is this fucking real?
>>15463664Opiates, I think? Someone explained it's definitely some kind of hard drug that's common as a medication when used correctly? Dunno the name though
>>15459511INTO THE WOKOVER THE FIRE WITH NO REGARD FOR A THINGBUT THAT I'MTHE LORD OF THE EGGSI RULE SANDWICH MAKINGHOW DOES HE LEAVE WITHOUT BREAKING?
>>15460860>i've always wondered what it's like to have a job. the only food i've had is honey baked ham for a couple of months during the holidays. it was neat, it makes me want to do some related but job
>>15460860bro what? they hire any kind of retards in kitchens. if you actually have solid job experience and seem like you know how to follow directions literally anywhere that isn't a michelin star resto will take you as a cook
>>15459544wtf are those eggs real?
>>15459544this fucking rocks
>>15466759No seared bite guy?
>>15467233coming from a professional chef in fine dining, no there really isn't. ramsey is a fucking hack
>>15468973I agree, I was saying that with reference to the OP egg king webm. ramseys eggs just look undercooked and not delicious
>>15462424does she still wrestle?
>>15467238im sure it was a fucking nightmare when your parents made you, but look how you turned out :) don't hate the playa, hate the game my main man
>>15468065I AM THE GOD OF CHEAP BREAKFASTLORD OF THE EGG
This Friday 17:40 UTC [convert to your timezone at your own perril] /ck/ takes on /n/ in the group stage of the 4chn winter cup.check >>15465180 for more information and keep your eyes peled for a matchthread on the day
>>15470597Fuck off, faggot. There's a reason why your discord cup is spamfiltered on 99% of this website.
>>15459511i can't fucking stand how much "3rd world prepares disgusting street food with zero food storage or handling standards" videos are pushed on social media. this is absolute shit and you could not pay me to eat it.
>>15467970Why post an explanation if you admittedly don't have any idea?
>>15463454This pisses me off. My fundie step grandmother had a dying nerve in her leg and instead of getting surgery she prayed to Jesus, claiming he healed her. Retarded bitch can barely walk now.
>>15459511I really wish I knew how he got out of that eggfort.
>>15467072That one greasy faggot nodding his head the whole time for good boy points.
>>15459525Transpeople are mentally ill. They should be helped via modern medicine and therapy rather than hormones and surgery. Ignoring the issue and telling them they are perfectly normal is half the problem.
>>15462144what does the egg do?
>>15470661There is only one way.You have to eat all the eggs
>>15470693it dies alone and forgotten
>>15470699i mean is it used as a binder or something?
>>15470707thanks for your help
>>15463664Sleep tight nodder
>>15459525A woman you will never be,suicide likely at age forthy three
>>15470889needz more seasoning but YUM
>>15470889why do so many people use those shitty tfal pans
>>15460199imagine being a small local shop thinking you're getting a big break by "a big internet tv personality type guy or something" stopping by asking to do a profile on your place and this mayo lord waddles into your shop and puts his nose right against the crust of your pizzas you slaved over. fuck this country
>>15463096do you think he's imagining his weed selling son's head there instead of the pineapple
>>15463664she off them xans bruh xD
>>15470690This is what you feel must be right, but the science shows it is not merely mental. You should do more reading before making such naive proclamations.
>>15459544Woah is that real?
>>15470905because they are not shitty
>>15459525here's your (you) tranny
>>15463909and it was then that I knew it was time for me to leave
>>15471147no copyright under AnCap, retard
>>15471963at first i thought it was the curtains exploded, but now i see the twit is turned on the faucet
>>15470760you got xtra protein, five dolla!
>>15462144This isnt a food webm, this is a mental illness webm
>>15460199God bless this man
>>15463664I hate that 2:30 feeling.
>>15463470Her nostrils look absolutely enormous when she tilts her head back because she has a filter on to make her eyes bigger, which affects the nostrils when they're high up on the screen.
>>15472685now that you mention it.never looked at them but yeah lmao
>>15467072i would walk off the set in the middle of that bullshit
>>154634254cc was happening before discord was even conceived you retarded newfag. I recommend hanging yourself before you say something even more idiotic.
>>15460887Everybody loves the eggman
>>15463767Don't question an artist
>>15459544How did they teach the cat to dance like that?
>>15459511Damn nigga, how many eggs do you need?
>>15471147fly your flags at half mast for those who have died protecting the thin yellow line
>>15462172thank you for reminding me that beef wellington existsanyone got any good recipes?
Post the retarded girl that drops all of the pancakes.
>>15471963Who the fuck doesnt know to drape a wet tea towl over the pot.
>>15473415i didn't but now i do. >thanks to you ;)
>>15463424>>15463470>>15465229>>15472699wtf is wrong with asian women?
>>15473659Some of them have zero respect for sea life.
>>15473683Chinamen have no respect for life of any kind.
>>15472699Secretly hate the penis..... terrible
>>15463909sick reference bro
>>15463454jacks dad is still alive? Wtf?
>>15459544how does the cat dance like that without breaking any eggs?
>>15472699>point it at myself instead off off to the side or downf*id moment
>>15472699me in front
>>15474005the eggs are cgi
>>15470661based miia poster
>>15473327>suddenlyit was suicide
>>15470634suck the bean gas out of my shit-hole
>>15460860Bruz, my dad went to jail more times than I've had hot breakfasts, didn't work an honest day in his life for 20 years and they still hired him in a kitchen.
>>15462433>That tattooHoly shit thats my fucking aunt
>>15475068wait, are you being serious
>>15475068She seeing anybody, pal?
>>15472719Wow great way to lose your tax break on holiday expenses retard.
>>15474278Omurice minus ketchup and rice
>>15470643This is why you don't get laid
>>15475737but anon that's not true. i both give and take
>>15467970Usually a benzodiazepine called Xanax.
>>15463322that's a man
>>15459544How is the media not talking about this!?!?
>>15460887Woah dude, relax lol
>>15470905Tfal pans are good.
>>15471963How can someone be so stupid. And the other girl just standing there laughing, probably. Even when I first got into cooking I never made a fucking fire.
>>15476739Oh plus the other person filming...
>>15467072I had these for breakfast at a fancy hotel restaurant in the south of France. It was literally a pile of egg flavored snot. Not saying they tasted bad but the texture was horrific.
>>15462496This looks disgusting but I would destroy it.
Anyone have the vegan egg webm?
>>15459525all the newfags replying lol
>>15461988I've used the canned beef and pork from Costco, you gotta drain that water off and if you add a ton of seasoning it's not that bad. However what they did with the water was fucking disgusting and I guarantee their whole kitchen smells like cat food now.
>>15462144was this "my way"?
>>15478947More of a "no way".
>>15461988This the shit they used to give us back when I was on welfare as a kid. The pork is better. And you need a power drill to stir the peanut butter.
>>15461106You're either a roastie or a guy that the closest thing he's had to sex is ogling sluts in yoga pants.
>>15463126That, and the jaggedness of the wound. I cut myself to the bone with a sharp ass nice and it was spurting blood with my heartbeat. Held it over my head, and squeezed a paper towel around it for ten minutes and it was basically healed.I still have a scar from a dull knife cut.
>>15470659I mean, my grandmother can barely walk, and she's an atheist and a hypochondriac.Not religious, just saying.
>>15463664I can't believe the police murdered this innocent sandwich artist.
>>15467072That's not scrambled eggs, that's whipped protein porridge.
>>15473949sauce? Looks like something off the red green show
>>15459525gr8 b8 m8> ywnbaw
>>15479265I make them the "ramsay" way sometimes but I let them cook a little more and they are actually really good. I agree though everytime I see him make his they look too runny for me.
>>15462424>not crushing onion between thighs
>>15459525are you a bot or something? only the people who make transphobic comments aren't from reddit. Plenty of them are newfags though. probably from 9gag or other shit holes, but definately never reddit. Why would you complain about a classic like egg man and then go on to say insults on the website that popularized blackface and lazers and screaming nigger make you feel like this place is full of redditors?
>>15475068>recognizing a family member through their tattoo and not their faceDo you have prosopagnosia?
>>15470880nu.. noh. that. thats the % man, not the age. lurk more.
>>15473390Unironivally, Gordon Ramsey has a good one on his YT page.
>>15459511Can confirm that india is a /ck/ country.This guy is not an isolated example of badass/ghetto cooking, everywhere you go someone is making a living off their cooking skills.- every street corner has someone selling snacks if nothing else.The best part was seeing the highly ergonomic stations that are rigged up sometimes out of junk.FOH was some 10 year old elbowing his way through the packed passengers on a train while trying to avoid being too badly molested, OH+S was a rich guy who happened to be there at the time, wholesaler was a dude with a crate of something who yelled all day.Yet the food was still better than your average meal in the UK.
>>15462433Does anyone actually know what this is from, for like....reasons? But seriously I am actually curious, is it a bad b movie? Is it porn? Is it just a 30 minute video of that woman eating that entire log of cheese and loaf of bread that someone found in their creepy uncles garage? Why does it look like a 70s Italian movie while she for some reason gives me more modern vibes?
>>15462428the mistake was keeping the piece that big in the first place. Is one person really going to eat that?
>>15473429get it off the burner and cover it. if you don't think you can carry it safely just cover it.
>>15480092Holy shit you are so fucking new you might as well be a foetus.
tomorrow17:40 UTC/ck/ vs /n/ in the opening match off our winter cup campaign finally back at our home stadium which is now ported to the new PES
I love huffing but it ways makes me hungry. What are some good foods that pair well with paint bros?
>>15480862tell me more about how I'm a foetus redditor.
>>15463664Did they died?
>>15481831ngl that looks tasty
>all these ja/ck/ webms>nobody has posted the best one
posting a go from our last match against /biz/ in honor of $GME
>>15470760at first i thought this was disgusting, then I realized they are bees.
>>15482158If the bees want it that bad you know it's good, bees are super clean insects too so i dont mind them licking and beeing all over it
>>15480253It's porn. The actress is called Anna Nova
>>15481957What more is there to say about it?
>>15482814>beeing all over it
>>15482071Seeing that thumbnail is like reading the number 177013
>>15467072>5 eggs for one piece of toastit's supposed to be scrambled eggs not fucking egg cream
>>15483094I dunno, I figured you had at least a few cultural references to make, as a long time user of 4chins to my foetusness, I figured there was a lot you could choose to meme on me with. instead all you are doing is making it obvious you cannot meme in addition to not being able to spell. Ah right, I remember who can't meme. return to reddit at once.
Can someone post the webm with the boy selling eggs right next to the egg king's stand?
>>15467188It's the French technique, and it's delicious.
>>15475418>an omelet is just omelet-rice without ketchup or riceNooooooo, you don't say?
>>15463644Its warming my heart to knkw im not the only one
>>15474278beautiful french omlette
>>15480239I egg king was Mexican
>>15460199So the shitty(literally) water from NY makes the pizza taste better?
>>15470937you will never be a woman and you will always look like a man