/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.14572594]

Has he ever done any wrong? Alton is the only based chef you should ever listen to.

[Anonymous No.14572605]

Lots of chefs have a base

[Anonymous No.14572609]

>>14572594
alton is a rich piece of shit fuck him

[Anonymous No.14572640]

>>14572594
He's not a chef, never has been.
He's a tv presenter and producer.

[Anonymous No.14572651]

>>14572594
He's a right winger

[Anonymous No.14572752]

He does all these shows that make him seem like a wacky, lovable goof, but I get the vibe he's always on edge and about to explode into a Christian Bale-tier rant if someone does anything wrong.

[Anonymous No.14572872]

Pretty hard to be a real scientist if you are a born again Christian

[Anonymous No.14573046]

He’s really into watches guns literature and the finer things in general. Make of that what you will. In my book that’s based, but in someone else’s it may not be.

[Anonymous No.14573081]

>>14572872

There’s Christian scientists and scientist Christians. They aren’t always at odds. Religion can’t explain everything and neither can science.

[Anonymous No.14573099]

>>14572651
so even more based then

[Anonymous No.14573105]

>>14572594
What has Bobby Flat ever done wrong? He even banged qt Giata

[Anonymous No.14573128]

>>14572609
You have issues with your own income, I see. Work hard, take risks and make your own way in the world. He doesn't seem like someone who inherited his money or got it from luck to me.

>>14572640
>>>14572594 (OP)
>He's not a chef, never has been.
>He's a tv presenter and producer.
This. He did attend some sources, probably just to get grant money, but he was a cook from desire first. When I saw him in bookstores doing a read from his first couple of cookbooks, the entire audience was Applegeeks and film and camera people asking questions about his production tricks. He was pretty obviously annoyed with them, one by one the same topic, honestly, becuase he was trying on this cooking hat and there was no interest in the books nor their recipes. I loved his shows the first couple of years, all the great anthropologists, scientists and random people who showed up.

>>14572752
I'm sure you're right. In watching his Quarantine videos, I marveled at his nightly cocktail frequency and the awkward and strained interactions with his wife both. He always seemed a bit closeted squishy to me because of that simmering under the surface kind of scoffing, fashion sense, and almost mean spirited critical eye. I was sure during his skinny diet phase and professed diet of deenz and nothing delicious, that he had caught HIV or cancer related to it. He was hanging out with Jeffrey types and dressing a bit too southern dapper. I still like him immensely to this day and would love to dine with him or be his neighbor, but he acts literally seconds away from a frustrated temper tantrum most of the time, and must be tough on those who are actually in his circle. He couldn't have found a more patient partner.

[Anonymous No.14573147]

>>14572872
>Pretty hard to be a real scientist if you are a born again Christian
Most scientists have faith in God. If you worked at any University or had a research job, and befriended your colleagues, you'd see that was the case. The athiest types are just the most vocal about their opinions. Faith is a personal and private matter for most people. I don't know where you get your information from, but it goes without saying that being a scientist doesn't put you at odds with anything in religion or church. Sects and cults are a different story of course.
In fact the sheer lack of possible randonmess in science is one path that brings very educated people to their first inklings of exploring faith. Francis Collins is one famous example, and he grew up on an athiest commune no less.

[Anonymous No.14573167]

>>14572872
It's not just Christians, anyone who can think critically has problems with the university system for churning out unthinking sperglords who only repeat religious dogma and don't even understand the nature of their beliefs.

[Anonymous No.14573169]

>>14572594
I wanna fuck this man so bad

[Anonymous No.14573199]

>>14572594
A chef wearing a suit is silly since the costume has absolutely nothing to do with cooking.
You can't cook in a suit. You don't use it at work even if you're the ceo.

[Anonymous No.14573229]

hes pedantic

[Anonymous No.14573276]

>>14573128

I agree that he’s probably a closet homo but oddly enough I respect him more for it in this day and age of queers being loud and proud and everyone patting them on the shoulder for it. He knows it degenerate so he represses it. That’s admirable.

[Anonymous No.14573525]

>>14572594
>Has he ever done any wrong?
He shilled for Kimber's absolutely fucktarded 3" barrel 1911.

[Anonymous No.14573656]

>>14573525
>3" barrel 1911
Holy shit, this is hilarious. Who buys this crap?

[Anonymous No.14573685]

>>14572640
Yeah. That's probably why he's so much more informative. Celebrity chefs are more limited in their knowledge. They've only done a few things in a few restaurants, and have to pretend they have authority about other things. It doesn't occur to them to do research. If they were the reading type they wouldn't have become chefs.

[Anonymous No.14573689]

>>14573656
>Who buys this crap?
Alton Brown, apparently.

[Anonymous No.14573691]

>>14573656
>snubnose pistols literally do not work you fucking moron, you might as well learn kung foo to protect yourself.
ok babydick

[Anonymous No.14573705]

>>14573689
I mean, his taste in guns is usually good, if not all over the place.

>>14573691
It's a 45 with a 3" barrel. That's the most retarded thing ever.
>inb4 "but it also comes in 9mm!"
A "1911" with a 3" barrel in 9mm would be the second most retarded thing ever.

[Anonymous No.14573712]

>>14573705
baby dick

[Anonymous No.14573732]

>>14573276
I think I just more notice it as an explanation for underlying kind of cattiness and grumpiness. I agree with you. The only sad part is seeing people I really care for over the years having their life derailed, or kind of tricked by a double lifestyle spouse who didn't treat them quite right. Perceptive or codependents don't always understand that what isn't quite right in their relationship isn't fixable, they'll just take everything to heart as some problem with themself.

[Anonymous No.14573736]

>>14573712
Is this the peak noguns argument?

[Anonymous No.14573750]

I saw Alton at a grocery store in Los Angeles a few years ago. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything. He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying. The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter. When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly. Good Eats my ass.

[Anonymous No.14573762]

>>14573750
I can't remember who this pasta was originally about, but I've seen it with Guy Fieri before.

[Anonymous No.14573787]

>>14573147
>most science happens in countries converted to christianity by force in the past, and for most of the history of those countries not being christian made you an outcast or even got you jailed or killed

>"CHRISTIANITY DID SCIENCE GUYS ITS ALL US!"

Every time. Lying, subversive weasels

[Anonymous No.14573791]

>>14573762
Keanu Reeves

[Anonymous No.14573801]

>>14573736
No, it's just an amusing fact about gun nuts.

[Anonymous No.14573802]

>>14573128
>being poor means you aren't working hard enough

[Anonymous No.14573821]

>>14573801
I'm not usually one to judge, but do you always imagine what a man's penis looks like?

[Anonymous No.14573884]

No straight man is that snarky fashionable and meticulous about detail.

[Anonymous No.14573908]

>>14573821
No, it's just an amusing fact about homos.

[Anonymous No.14573911]

>>14573791
Nah. This pasta was around before everyone started sucking Keanu Reeves dick

[Anonymous No.14573915]

>>14573821
Noguns hate the ideas of responsibility and accountability, so they're constantly projecting

[Anonymous No.14573919]

>>14573787
That's a real shallow and ignorant take.
About what can be expected from certain people.

[Anonymous No.14573928]

>>14572594
he thinks the best philly cheese steak isn't from philly and while he's eating the sandwich says some shit like
>i respect this sandwich so much i'm not going to eat half of it right now
how can anyone take this clown seriously

[Anonymous No.14573932]

>>14573915
>hate the ideas of responsibility
Entire ideologies are built on this.

[Anonymous No.14573967]

>>14573908
If the mere mention of a gun makes you start thinking about men's penises, you might want to seek counselling.

[Anonymous No.14574034]

>>14573967

You know there’s feminine penis too right faggot

[Anonymous No.14574143]

Is he the anti-Alton Brown?

[Anonymous No.14574166]

>>14574143
No, he's just a fussy, anal-retentive guy who can't handle anything but mild, Americanized versions of actual good food.

[Anonymous No.14574206]

>>14574143

Why would you say that, because he called Alton gay?

[Anonymous No.14574568]

>>14572651
>he’s not a retarded adult baby

[Anonymous No.14574654]

>*blocks your path*

[Anonymous No.14574683]

>>14574166
I used to love this guy's show, but I always noticed I hated whatever brand their testers liked. Helped me understand most Americans like low flavor high sugar foods, and suddenly the popularity of shit brands began to make sense.

[Anonymous No.14574767]

>>14574206
>Massachusetts vs Georgia
>Lib vs Con
>Hair vs Bald
>Shave vs Beard
>Public Access vs Private Corporation

[Anonymous No.14574857]

>>14574143
>Is he the anti-Alton Brown?
Not at all,Kimball had an artsy magazine and some guest spots on TV shows going long before that "Test Kitchen" fakery on PBS that tied into his magazine. Kimball predates Alton by a couple of decades. Is he a chef? No, Kimball's degree is in "Primitive Art"..and his pride of the magazine was botanical sketches on the back cover.
I think they were making fun of Kimball on SNL before Good Eats was a thing.

[Anonymous No.14575226]

> Alton Brown

> Chef


Pick one.

A drama major and show producer that went to culinary school so he could make food shows, but has never actually worked in a kitchen.

[Anonymous No.14575234]

He kicked my dog.

[Anonymous No.14575238]

>>14575226
And that's a good thing. Real chefs have nothing to offer. That's why they're doing one of the shittiest jobs on the planet.

[Anonymous No.14575292]

>>14575238

Not true, Chef Micheal Smith. QED.

[Anonymous No.14576211]

>>14575226
What makes a person a chef? Do they have to have a culinary arts degree? How many years of restaurant experience? How much do they know behind the science of cooking?

Alton Brown is a chef. He has several bestselling cookbooks and has shown his wide range of knowledge on cooking pretty much anything and everything. He's proven to know more than a lot of "chefs" with degrees and even decades of restaurant experience. Plus his recipes are legit great.

[Anonymous No.14576334]

>>14572594
I love his egg nog.

[Anonymous No.14576362]

>>14572640
He has a science background and then got into cooking, which really seems to develop the best techniques. Too many culinary school fags just parrot off shit some guy too retarded to open his own restaurant and decided to teach told them, and never bother to challenge or test it.

[Anonymous No.14576365]

>>14576211
You could start by checking a dictionary. You should know such basic things before coming to a board like this. We're not here to complete your basic schooling for you.

[Anonymous No.14576386]

>>14576365
What are you getting at here pal? The origins of chef basically mean the person in charge of the kitchen, but then expansion and delegation of duties gave lesser workers a chef title. Some people think that it means that you have to have worked in a professional kitchen, but what about home chefs? There's no accrediting agency dispensing the title of chef, at least that anyone gives credence.

[Anonymous No.14576458]

>>14572594
the unitasker autism is kinda stupid and holy shit his wife is top 5 most annoying human beings I've ever witnessed
but his recpies are usually on point

[Anonymous No.14576471]

>>14576386
There's no such thing as a home chef. That's like calling the guy who will never finish his novel a professional writer.

[Anonymous No.14576476]

>>14576471

What if I’m in the kitchen shouting at and berating my wife and kids to bring me ingredients and shit

[Anonymous No.14576534]

>>14576471
In medieval France, even lesser nobles would have a chef in their kitchen. How is that any different than some richfag having a chef either live in or stop by for just preparing the family dinner.

[Anonymous No.14577021]

>>14573911
Think it was Bill Murray, but I saw it with Shaq too a long time ago I think.

[Anonymous No.14578444]

>>14573762
Ryan Gosling

[Anonymous No.14579162]

>>14573128
I don't think he's gay, I think his wife's forced fashion aesthetic (she's some kind of "designer") has rubbed off on him. It doesn't always seem like he's that happy with her antics. I always get a little suspicious when couples use phrases like "we like 'x'" or "we do it this way". That's fine for some things, but with them it comes off a little forced.

I stopped watching the Quarantine show simply because of her. He understands how to be on camera and how to maintain a certain mood. She has the tendency to drop some kind of bitch-bomb and ruin the mood. Then you can see him kind of scramble to get things back on track.

The other annoyance with her is that she has absolutely no interest in his work. I can't imagine being in a relationship where you weren't at least supportive of each other's interests and career.

[Anonymous No.14579436]

as bad as iron chef america was, Alton's commentary was the only redeeming part of it

[Anonymous No.14579632]

>>14576476
Then you’re based