/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.14548436]

Today we're gonna find out what happens when you vomit on the steak.
Before I vomited, I didn't eat anything for two days to empty my stomach, this is important because you need to concentrate the flavor.
Now I'm going to do what's called 'packing', where you eat the kind of flavors you want in the vomit to really bring out the flavor.
And I know that this doesn't look very appetizing, but there's nothing I won't do for a delicious steak.
Today I'm going to be eating three pounds of ground beef, and you know how I like my ground beef, it's 80/20.
That's 80% beef and 20% fat.
After consuming the beef I made this mixture. It's a glass of warm water mixed with a lot of table salt.
As always, exact amounts are in the description down below.
After throwing back the water as fast as I could and rushing to the steak table, I was rewarded with this enormous amount of projectile vomit.
Now, be careful to remove the chunks, you only want the liquid, which is partially infused with the ground beef to form nature's greatest beef stock.
And there's another advantage; since I only recently ate, the vomit is full of stomach acid, which will tenderize the steak.
Normally I'd season the steak first, but since it's going to be in the bath with liquid, we'll season it after removing it from the machine.
Now all that's left to do is to seal the liquid and the steak in a bag. and cook them at 135 degrees Fahrenheit for two and a half hours.

2 AND A HALF HOURS AT 135 DEGREES F (67 DEGREES C)

After removing the steak, ugh. The smell is dreadful.
But beyond the smell of the vomit, the steak smells okay, so I'm willing to go ahead with the experiment.
. . .
"So here is the beautiful steak! And everyone, the smell might not be that good, but the steak is super tender."
"Now what you need to do is pat it dry, to get a perfect crust on the steak."
"After this I'm going to season it with salt, pepper, and garlic powder."
"I know it doesn't look that good right now, but watch this!"

-montage-

[Anonymous No.14548437]

"Alright, what do you think, Angel?"
"Uh... To be honest it's looking kind of bad."
"Oh come on, Angel, you haven't even tried it yet, hahaha!"
"I'm sorry, Guga, I... I mean, I'll give it a try!"
"Yeah you will, Angel! That's right!"
-high-five-
"Okay, let's try the steak, cheers everybody!"
-eating steak-
-Angel looks revolted, but Guga looks pleasantly surprised-
"Oh my god, everybody, the steak is so juicy! I've never had anything like this, have you Angel?"
"I think I'm dying."
"Oh Angel likes to kid, but this steak is really delicious! It's not as good as a regular steak, but the tenderness, the juiciness, this is a completely different flavor!"
"Guga it tastes horrible!"
-Angel goes for another piece and wolfs it down-
"Oh my god, this is the worst thing I've ever eaten!"
"As you can see, Angel isn't a fan, and I must admit, it doesn't taste very good at all, but the /texture/ is-"
-As Guga was talking, Angel continue to eat the steak, on his fourth piece, he starts crying-
"Are you alright, Angel?"
"It's so horrible, but I'm so hungry!"
"Angel, stop!"
"I HAVE TO EAT!"
"NO, ANGEL!"
-camera cuts to Guga sitting alone-
"Anyway, guys, that was the vomit steak, I hope you guys enjoyed this video, if you do enjoy, be sure to give it a thumbs-up! If you're not a subscriber, be sure to subscribe to see future videos, and if you have any interest in any of the equipment I use, links are always in the description down below. Thank you so much for watching, and I'll see you guys in the next one, buh-bye!"

[Anonymous No.14548441]

>more e-celeb spam

[Anonymous No.14549086]

>>14548436
>didn't season with guga rub
Immersion broken

[Anonymous No.14549159]

>>14548441
The future of the world is on the internet. If you can't stand it start by stopping posting on 4chan and also stop crying in literally every thread.

[Anonymous No.14549418]

>>14548436
>>14548437
aaaaaaAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[Anonymous No.14549776]

>>14548436
>>14548437
This is by far, the most hilarious shit I've read here in the past weeks. Thanks.