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/ck/ - Food & Cooking


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File: 2.87 MB, 920x516, CHiP.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14538784 No.14538784 [Reply] [Original]

Essential Kitchen Accessories Edition.

>> No.14538788

a unitasker for baking cookies that probably costs $500. i really despise rich people

>> No.14538794
File: 1.73 MB, 400x225, 1596840869305.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14538794

>>14538784
>TL;DR SCIENCE
This is indistinguishable from an actual ironic 4chan shitpost full of contempt but it is played completely straight and I'm sure the copy writer doesn't even know where the meme came from or that they sound like a retard

>> No.14538795

>>14538788
Truly rich people don't buy this sort of trash. It's middle class people still trapped in the "gotta' get more shit!" mindset. More on the California Highway Patrol device; if it needs a program on your phone to work, it's not worth buying. No matter the cost.

>> No.14538803

consoooooooom

>> No.14538837

>>14538784
Those cookies don't even look good.

>> No.14538847
File: 2.48 MB, 1280x720, Jack111.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14538847

>> No.14538852
File: 2.34 MB, 488x270, steak americano.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14538852

>>14538784

>> No.14538853

>>14538852
radiates strong latinx energy

>> No.14538855

>>14538852
Why would you do this WHY

>> No.14538857

>>14538847
This thread has been ja/ck/'d

>> No.14538858

>>14538852
Like I know she ruined the meat beyond imagination but she also fucked up the potatoes to an alarming degree in at least five different respects

>> No.14538861

>>14538852
I want to run a set on this fat spic broad with a pair of those oven mitts, then put her to sleep with a right uppercut.

>> No.14538869

>>14538852
is this a drag queen

>> No.14538874

>>14538861
Dude I found the video, she's a bong traveler lmaooo

>> No.14538876

>>14538852
A cow died for this

>> No.14538879

Anyone got the .webm of the one-armed indian shaping bread with his armpit?

>> No.14538880
File: 2.92 MB, 1280x720, jack2(1).webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14538880

>> No.14538884

>>14538852
who

WHO

THE FUCK

dices ...DICES POTATOES LIKE THAT then and only then oven blanches them for 2 minutes and and then CRUSHES THEM into a skillet for a few seconds in no oil and calls them chips

I am FUCKING LOSING IT

>> No.14538889
File: 312 KB, 358x358, file.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14538889

>>14538852
Looks good to me!

>> No.14538890
File: 2.87 MB, 360x360, 1596195792991.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14538890

>> No.14538892

>>14538890
fucking why

>> No.14538899

>>14538880
Considering the shit I've seen from Jack, this is rather inoffensive. Even that chicken has potential to be pretty good.

>> No.14538900

>>14538892
To waste resources in an ostentatious and unhealthy display. i.e. to make money via ad revenue.

>> No.14538902

>>14538899
it's more his inability to do something as simple as browning a tortilla in a pan

>> No.14538923
File: 2.87 MB, 640x636, 1595691817530.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14538923

>> No.14538925

>>14538923
i find this remarkably offensive

>> No.14538928
File: 2.81 MB, 480x480, funfetti_milkshake.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14538928

Found this last night.

>> No.14538932

>>14538923
I don't dislike the food or concept at all, though I'm sure it's way too expensive. What I do hate is that bitch's flailing and shaking. It's like she's fucking epileptic!

>> No.14538937

>>14538928
>black hands
>frosting on the outside of glass
>sugar everywhere
NOOOOO YOUR PEOPLE GET DIABETES SO EASILY STOPPPPP

>> No.14538938

>>14538928
I pity the fool that has to clean those glasses.

>> No.14538939

>>14538928
nice finally a quick easy way to get both drunk and diabetic

>> No.14538942

>>14538928
>cake vodka
do ruskies really

>> No.14538950

>>14538937
That webm spares you the guy screaming loudly about how to make that abomination.

>> No.14538965
File: 2.96 MB, 710x712, 1595713548616.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14538965

>> No.14538977

>>14538890
>that meal reveal at the end
what the fuck

>> No.14538980
File: 2.71 MB, 844x446, d70573c5fe6ac9c42ac62e431782b0724df1076f37c7e6403feb7255c234cbd5.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14538980

>> No.14538993

>>14538884
They're just wedges. It's normal. I mean what she does with them is not normal but the shape is fine.

>> No.14538997

>>14538965
I feel indifference.

>> No.14539014

>>14538965
i'd eat it

>> No.14539020

>>14538861
>I want to run a set
What does that mean?

>> No.14539022

>>14538993
No. Perfectly squared tubed rhomboids are not a good chip shape. I have made ever kind of potato in every possible way and that is the worst shit I have ever seen, start to finish

>> No.14539051
File: 2.94 MB, 640x360, Perfect scrambled eggs.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14539051

>>14538965
There's better ways to do eggs.

>> No.14539054

>>14539051
one of the few things this faggot can do right

>> No.14539065

>>14539051
It's a kind of scramble but I like some chew to my egg personally

>> No.14539094

>>14538847
jack, i...

>> No.14539103

>>14539051
>he doesn't add cheese
megapleb

>> No.14539105

>>14539103
Scrambed eggs don't need cheese you fat fuck.

>> No.14539106

>>14539103
in the other video he adds mascarpone or ricotta i think

>> No.14539110

>>14538884
Specifically English people its not even the entire uk its just scum class english people that do that shit. Wouldn't see that in Wales northern Ireland or scotland absolutely no chance

>> No.14539116
File: 2.78 MB, 844x446, jack3(2).webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14539116

>> No.14539127

spending my sunday making ja/ck/ webms, a fine way to end the weekend

>> No.14539132

>>14539105
Yeah well it doesn't need butter either, retard, but that doesn't mean you don't add it for the gestalt effect

>> No.14539139

>>14538942
No just Americans

>> No.14539149

>>14539139
I've never in my life seen this, let alone seen someone consume it. But I guess someone has to, and if they buy it anywhere, they buy it here.

>> No.14539154

>>14539116
What is even happening here hahahaha

>> No.14539161

>>14539116
Is that a fucking stick of imitation crab he puts in there?

>> No.14539176

>>14538890
looks tasty. whats the problem?

>> No.14539178
File: 224 KB, 634x422, Sans titre.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14539178

>>14539116
Is... Is that supposed to be a boeuf bourguignon ? What the fuck

>> No.14539187
File: 572 KB, 600x580, 2ec.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14539187

>>14539178
>>14539116
>recipe called for 20 pearl onions
>just got 20 regular onions and called it a day

>> No.14539204

>>14539051
Sloppa shit

>> No.14539237

>>14539176
Nothing, I wanna try it

>> No.14539344
File: 2.40 MB, 844x446, chili(1).webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14539344

>> No.14539379

>>14539051
hummmmm, vomit on a plate

>> No.14539387

>>14538880
That looks edible, unlike half the shit jack makes

>> No.14539404

>>14538928
It was perfectly fine until he added the cake mix. Sure, it would have been obscenely sweet. But as a once-a-season dessert, that would have been fine.

>> No.14539427

>>14538965
Remove the egg and reduce the mozzarella and that doesn't look bad.

>> No.14539455

>>14538852
https://www.ladbible.com/entertainment/tv-and-film-viewers-horrified-at-womans-cooking-on-come-dine-with-me-20191116

It's a fucking Brit.

>> No.14539492
File: 1.21 MB, 1280x720, 8577e76bfeb57843d9f81d9b014e54d122e9786a18c2b3f2593cede00f84cc77.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14539492

>> No.14539498
File: 2.84 MB, 600x514, Meat Soup (Kjötsúpa).webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14539498

Iceland was a mistake

>> No.14539529

>>14539498
Could they not grow spices or something? This looks like hot ham water from Arrested Development

>> No.14539531

>>14539492
I havent seen this video but I guarantee you he blamed the iron and returned it to the store after this

>> No.14539532

>>14539116
>>14539178
it is supposed to be boeuf bourgignon. i just watched, i'm surprised he put in the amount of effort he did and didn't cut too many corners. it's actually decent by his standards.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rnQS8LPiefc

>> No.14539536
File: 2.78 MB, 640x360, 1596490767211.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14539536

>> No.14539537
File: 2.17 MB, 1280x720, weins.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14539537

>>14538847
jack it baby

>> No.14539556

>>14538928
Raw flour?! That'll taste very reminiscently of ass.

>> No.14539572

>>14539536
this is why China will usurp the US

>> No.14539582

>>14539572
That was in the Philippines, in front of a fuckin' Jollibee.

>> No.14539588

>>14539582
oh, they all look the same to me

>> No.14539606

>>14539572
Not with that illiteracy rate, you won't.
>Pangasinan, Philippines

>> No.14539615

>>14539536
He's just pretending for chrissakes

>> No.14539621

>>14539537
soijack as a person lol

>> No.14539627

>>14538980
Oil not even heated up at all lol.

>> No.14539652

>>14538890
I was fine with it until the burger.
Just eat the fried mac and cheese pucks. They're delicious enough as is.

>> No.14539659

>>14539020
it's an fgc term. basically to fight.

>> No.14539810

>>14539615

>> No.14539814

>>14538923
Even as a Californian who loves avocado, this makes me cringe hard.

>> No.14539855
File: 2.91 MB, 540x360, 1596062891016.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14539855

Delicious. Finally some good fuckin' food.

>> No.14539874
File: 2.87 MB, 852x480, CookiesNoAudio.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14539874

>> No.14539883

>>14538852
This is Come Dine With Me. Do Americans have that show or is this actually British?

>> No.14539902
File: 2.84 MB, 960x540, Burger King Dessert.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14539902

>>14538928
My pancreas hurts

>> No.14539944
File: 2.93 MB, 300x300, Tachin Joojeh.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14539944

>> No.14539952

>>14539902
What the fuck

>> No.14539954
File: 2.95 MB, 640x360, Average Mexican Drink.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14539954

>> No.14539958

>>14539944
that looks real good

>> No.14539967

>>14539537
i hope they bring him to justice

>> No.14539970

>>14539855
NO

>> No.14539987

>>14538784
I am irrationally angered over this webm.

"Cookies in ten minutes" you know what else bakes cookies in ten minutes? A fucking oven. I am absolutely seething

>> No.14539996

>>14538784
>using a special convection cooking technique

You mean a fan oven?

>> No.14540001

>>14539855
>that huge swath of butter tossed on the bun and then burger
fuck you

>> No.14540003

>>14539996
NO!
Special convection cooking technique!
It advanced science. You wouldn't understand!

>> No.14540007

>>14539987
Yeah, but does your oven require an app on your phone?
No? Fuck you, gib me 500 shekels.

>> No.14540043
File: 1.54 MB, 1920x1080, VillageFoodFactory.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540043

>>14539954
why is there always hair in the horchata?

>> No.14540080
File: 944 KB, 203x209, 1594049906432.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540080

>>14539532
>It's supposed to be Julia child's bourguignon
What a fucking failure of a man

>> No.14540093

>>14538965
waste of parmesan, long cooks kill it. ok otherwise.

>> No.14540105

>>14540080
>It's supposed to be Julia child's bourguignon
>>14539532
Jesus fuck that's even worse. I feel like got took his arm to stop his cooking

>> No.14540121

>>14539498
>>14539529
this isn't a good one. there's some good meat soup out there. it might be like $20 though, iceland is expensive

>> No.14540127
File: 2.85 MB, 360x360, Stuffed Fried Pickles.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540127

>> No.14540144

>>14539944
why wouldn't they dice the chicken before they marinated it?

>> No.14540195

>>14540144
Lack of planning

>> No.14540222

>>14540195
well now i'm just angry.
they planned enough to make a video

>> No.14540237

>>14540222
Trips confirm. Hoes mad.

>> No.14540310

>>14539051
This is not impressive

>> No.14540318

>>14540310
There's a room full of people nodding, it must be

>> No.14540322

>>14539536
I strongly dislike fat children

>> No.14540324
File: 2.88 MB, 300x300, Spicy Fried Cauliflower “Chicken”.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540324

>> No.14540342

>>14540144
because that would be less effort and also increase surface area for the marinade to interact with the chicken, aiding to an overall better tasting result

>> No.14540345

>>14539855
im almost certain this is Solly's in milwaukee.

butterburgers are great once every 3 years or so.

>> No.14540351

>>14540043
took me a minute to realize those were kraft singles hes trying to remove the plastic from

>> No.14540357
File: 2.89 MB, 300x300, Sea Bass In Puff Pastry.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540357

>> No.14540372
File: 69 KB, 1440x1496, daddy's back.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540372

>>14538928
>vanilla ice cream
>the tub clearly says caramel

>> No.14540376
File: 2.87 MB, 300x300, Truffled Chicken Pot Pie.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540376

>> No.14540388

>>14540357
this seemed legit until he did the cutsey pastry sculpting. Looks like something you'd do to get a 5 year old to eat fish

>> No.14540396
File: 2.89 MB, 300x300, Salmon With Pesto Veggie Noodles.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540396

>> No.14540400
File: 684 KB, 900x894, Screen Shot 2020-08-09 at 1.41.04 PM.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540400

>>14540372
Pretty sure it's Vanilla. You might get it mixed up as the label says "Deluxe Churned". However, if you were trying to meme, then I have no clue who the faggot in the pic you used is or how he acts.

>> No.14540407

>>14540357
>>14540376
>>14540396
He better be using some super elite quality ingredients because none of this is particularly extraordinary

>> No.14540411
File: 2.87 MB, 300x300, Cabernet-Braised Short Ribs.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540411

Last one

>> No.14540433

>>14538847
Did he start doing the tongue thing after his strokes?

>> No.14540439

>>14540433
No, he always gave his food cunnilingus

>> No.14540467

>>14539051
OFFA HEAT
BACK ONNA HEAT

>> No.14540482
File: 2.89 MB, 240x240, Pear Butter Chicken And Waffles By ReShawn Wilder.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540482

>> No.14540519
File: 2.91 MB, 640x640, One-Pot Bacon And Wild Mushroom Risotto.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540519

>> No.14540537
File: 2.87 MB, 480x480, Grape Juice Fruit Rollup.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540537

>> No.14540574
File: 2.89 MB, 300x300, Garlic And Herb Leg Of Lamb With Potatoes.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540574

>> No.14540583

>>14540519
That looks really good. I'll have to try that sometime.

>> No.14540590

>>14540537
>this bakes at 150 degrees
>alcohol evaporates at 174 degrees
Do you think putting vodka in these before baking would work?

>> No.14540594
File: 2.90 MB, 300x300, Dutch-Oven Jalapeño Cheddar Bread.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540594

>> No.14540604

>>14540590
alcohol evaporates at room temperature dude

>> No.14540613
File: 2.92 MB, 300x300, Classic Coq Au Vin.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540613

>> No.14540614

>>14540590
>4-5 hour bake time
Sure as shit wont get you shitfaced, if that's what you're after, but feel free to try if it's just as a flavor experiment.

>> No.14540619

>>14538784
Speaking of cookies, how the fuck do I make them deliciously crispy without burning the chocolate?

>> No.14540626

>>14540590
Probably not.

>> No.14540634
File: 2.91 MB, 360x202, Classic Beef Stew.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540634

>> No.14540655
File: 2.84 MB, 360x360, Cajun Shrimp Bake.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540655

>> No.14540656

>>14538928
Should've used rhum instead.

>> No.14540659
File: 2.90 MB, 400x300, French Breakfast pt 1.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540659

>>14540656
igs

>> No.14540662
File: 2.90 MB, 400x300, French Breakfast pt 2.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540662

>>14540659

>> No.14540671

>>14540613
I don't really understand the point of getting that nice crispy skin on the chicken, and then cooking it in a sauce so that crisp isn't there any more. I'm sure it tastes good, but I'd rather have it with the crispy skin and then a sauce on the side

>> No.14540674

>>14539051
>that fag going wide eyed over the fucking garnish

>> No.14540679

>>14540671
You get the flavor of the maillard reaction but I agree with you on the texture.

>> No.14540702

>>14539537
People who make dumb as fuck faces like that deserve a beating

>> No.14540732

>>14540671
>I don't really understand the point of getting that nice crispy skin on the chicken, and then cooking it in a sauce so that crisp isn't there any more. I'm sure it tastes good, but I'd rather have it with the crispy skin and then a sauce on the side
That wasn't crisped, just browned on each side, a very common first step in making a chicken stew. It will render some of the fat and get a little "brown" flavor. It was still soft and floppy. Just try it both ways one day, and see for yourself. It improves the final stew's flavor and does a little bonus to the texture to the meat as well. The dark color you saw was just the red wine marinade staining the chicken.

I can understand a little annoyance in something deep fried, like buffalo wings, or orange chicken, that are then drenched in sauce

>> No.14540759
File: 2.89 MB, 532x300, Cheesy Volcano Fried Rice.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540759

Over 9000 hours in WebM for Bakas

>> No.14540806

>>14540732
I tried pan frying skinless, boneless chicken thighs. On advice of google I put them in and didn't touch them for 6 minutes. The golden crispy crust was so hard my knife couldn't cut it.

It was delicious though
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lf0tUnUB27I

>> No.14540845

>>14538784
does it have a marijuana mode for if I want to make edibles?

>> No.14540847

>>14540845
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL 420 BLAAAAAAAAAZE IT BRO

>> No.14540857

>>14538923
more annoying girl webms please

>> No.14540867

>>14538942
we are fucking stunned at how mutts flavor vodka and still dare to call it a vodka. The whole fucking point is that it has no taste!
t. russkie

>> No.14540874

>>14539855
>that cream pie close up at the end

>> No.14540894

>>14540537
I would take scissors and cut the wax paper with them to roll them up in it so nothing sticks

>> No.14540915

>>14540613
>classic coq au vin
>1st ingredient: chicken

>>14540671
coq a vin is rooster which is tougher than chicken normally is

>> No.14540958
File: 1.35 MB, 710x5303, Screenshot_2020-08-09 «Наши в городе » «Столичная» водка и её вариации в Америке(2).jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540958

>>14540867
Russian vodka autism is pretty fucking hilarious, but you outed yourself as a non-Russian by claiming vodka has no taste.

>> No.14540974

>>14540388
I agree it's dumb, but that's actually very common for fish puff pastry at least in america, I've never not seen it happen

>> No.14540978

>>14540958
anon your image clearly states there is nothing russian about this latvian export.

>> No.14540981

>>14538784
>chip bakes cookies in only ten minutes
you mean it bakes cookies in the same amount of time a regular oven does? wow, in fact its two minutes longer than an oven.

>> No.14540983

>>14540978
Yes, and?

>> No.14540984
File: 2.91 MB, 640x360, Russian Baked Beef.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14540984

>>14540978

>> No.14540994

>>14538847
Why does he have so much fear in his eyes?

>> No.14540997

>>14538847
There is a serious vibe I get from ja/ck/ that reminds me of my fil. God help me.

>> No.14541001

>>14540958
this garbage is only sold in the US. Just Cтoличнaя in general is a mutt meme. Most Russians who want a decent vodka drink Russian Standard or Beluga if you're fancy. You niggers flip out at the idea that vodka is supposed to be drunk ice-cold with a snack like a pickle or a piece of rye bread with salo on it. Instead you drink this gay flavored shit neat at room temperature.

>> No.14541005

>>14540958
the fucking Russian text there talks about how mutts are perverts who flavor their vodka. It's so ironic.

>> No.14541010

>>14541001
>this garbage is only sold in the US.
That's literally what the image says.
>>14541005
The last bit complains about Russian Standard being put beside "corn alcohol". If you're not some fucking gopnik, you understand that good vodka has a distinct taste. It's the retarded Ameircans who think "oh, vodka tastes like nothing, so let's make it flavoured!".

>> No.14541025

>>14541010
nobody calls the ethanol "taste" a taste in Russian. Taste in vodka means all the essential oils in cheap shit that didn't get filtered. We use the word "чиcтaя" or clean/clear to refer to it having no taste. Good vodka just tastes of ethanol and water, that's literally what good vodka is supposed to be.

>> No.14541030
File: 2.05 MB, 480x848, Forbidden Sipp.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14541030

>>14541025

>> No.14541033

>>14541025
Ask me how I know you're from Belarus.

>> No.14541038

>>14541033
You HAVE taken the Belarus-pill, RIGHT anon?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VLvpxm1VEGY

>> No.14541039

>>14541033
kek I'm not some potato-eating mustache-wearing faggot

>> No.14541091

>>14541030
That's ethanol, isn't it? Doesn't Brazil make their fuel from sugar canes turned into ethanol?

>> No.14541107

>>14540984
inauthentic, missing multiple litres of mayo.

>> No.14541147

>>14541091
Yeah, you can either get a gas-ethanol blend or what's effectively 190 proof cheap rum, since most mass-market vehicles can run on either.

>> No.14541167

>>14540984
maybe that's what charlie meant by "milk steak"

>> No.14541168

>>14538965
I want to see how burned those potatoes are

>> No.14541173
File: 2.90 MB, 540x390, Dollar Cheese Steak.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14541173

>> No.14541186

>>14538847
Not a real "big boy bite"

>> No.14541188

>>14541173
All that fucking steam. You just know that most of that "3.5oz" is injected water.

>> No.14541207
File: 2.94 MB, 640x360, dollar steak.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14541207

>>14541188
Nah it's high quality.

>> No.14541233

>>14541173
>>14541188
It could "purge", water from damaged cells caused by poor handling such and freezing and unfreezing.

Regardless, 1$ per 3.5 oz is still approaching 5 USD/lb for a lot of water and dangerous meat. You could go to a grocery story and shop through the beef for whatever is cheapest at the time and get something that isn't expired, and is less chewy, for that price. The cut is going to be random because its going to be whatever they want to get rid of.

>> No.14541240

>>14539127
god bless you and your work

>> No.14541276

>>14539855
I thought a butter burger is essentially when you make garlic bread out of the buns, not just slap literal butter on as a condiment

>> No.14541284

>>14538928
>raw flour
>vodka
>that much ice cream

STOP. What the fuck is wrong with people? Just make a goddamn milkshake if you want that much ice cream for fuck's sake.

>> No.14541311

>>14540324
Looks fucking pointless if the nuggets are that big

>> No.14541343

>>14540590
Don't ever waste alcohol on "alcohol edibles." This offends my religion, which is alcoholism

>> No.14541351

>>14540537
But how do you make the pants out of them?

>> No.14541364 [DELETED] 
File: 2.62 MB, 480x853, 1596738704920.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14541364

>>14540857

>> No.14541371

>>14538880
I'll admit I like my chicken burned like that.

>> No.14541374

>>14541343
preach brother. i would say a bloody marry counts as an edible though. that shit with soy, worcester, balsamico and capers is quite tasty.

>> No.14541390
File: 787 KB, 576x1024, 1595030820827.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14541390

>>14540857
That's all I save

>> No.14541416
File: 1.10 MB, 806x720, 1580138313424.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14541416

>>14541364
these are the people who will bash the fash...

>> No.14541427

>>14540894
They do that with the knife, you can see the paper on the rolls.

>> No.14541443

>>14541364
Cute retard

>> No.14541447

>>14541390
>girl

>> No.14541482

>>14540759
>wok style cooking in some tiny nonstick
WHY DOES EVERY WOMAN DO THIS
STOP DOING THIS, IT'S TERRIBLE FORM AND ACCOMPLISHES NOTHING BUT MUDDY FOOD

>> No.14541488

>>14540759
More like drowned rice

>> No.14541497

>>14538965
so am i the only one that notices that the egg went from poached to sunny when they depanned it?

>> No.14541558
File: 2.06 MB, 480x576, jack14.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14541558

>> No.14541563

>>14539054
No. Those eggs have the texture of barf and aren't as savory as they should be because of all the fucking dairy he's adding to them.

>> No.14541592

>>14540407
They make a million of them you stupid fuck.

>> No.14541639
File: 2.35 MB, 853x480, jack10.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14541639

>> No.14541642

>>14539065
I made eggs like this and came to the same conclusion. The solution was just to let them cook longer before adding anything to cool them down. They don't have to be that runny if you don't want them to be.

>> No.14541655
File: 473 KB, 1266x688, DontyouevertouchaweedGarrett.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14541655

>>14541558
>>14541639
Jack strikes again

>> No.14541664
File: 2.33 MB, 1280x720, jack06.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14541664

>>14541655
Jack's back

>> No.14541668
File: 1.91 MB, 1920x1080, jack16.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14541668

>> No.14541670

>>14538890
The second they poured it onto the baking pan, I was out. Why do these people feel the need to make a traditional dish, then fuck it up with some abortion of a continuing dish?

>> No.14541690
File: 2.74 MB, 640x360, jack04.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14541690

deliciouso

>> No.14541714

>>14539051
His scrambled eggs are so fucking vile

>> No.14541828

>>14541639
A tragedy in 3 parts

>> No.14541861

>>14541364
i would love to smash her head through the drywall

>> No.14541876
File: 2.92 MB, 640x360, jack09.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14541876

>>14541655
based, Jack teaches proper parenting
The looks on the faces of everyone else on that podcast was priceless

>> No.14541881

Guess who's back...
Back again...

>> No.14541885

>>14541876
ngl, that fucking pan slide was something I could never do and I have two fully functional arms

>> No.14541910
File: 2.84 MB, 640x360, jack02.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14541910

>>14541885
Just need a better pan, bro

>> No.14541984

>220 posts
>no eggfort

I'm surprised

>> No.14542015
File: 2.73 MB, 853x480, jack11.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14542015

>> No.14542056

>>14541427
I see it at the end now. It wasn't showing when they were rolling them up

>> No.14542066

>>14541188
I've had stuff like this before from a frozen steak place. it smells kinda fishy when you're cooking it up. I fed some to my dog but then felt bad so I threw everything away.

>> No.14542091
File: 2.90 MB, 640x354, 1595101687217.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14542091

>> No.14542099

>>14541690
ya guey

>> No.14542128

>>14538880
Pretty sure I saw some blood pouring down the tray

>> No.14542169

>>14542128
those were juices anon, not blood

>> No.14542180

>>14538784
>more than nine varieties
JUST FUCKING SAY TEN
WE ALL KNOW IT'S TEN
THIS ISN'T LIKE SAYING IT'S MORE THAN TWENTY OR MORE THAN A DOZEN
NINE IS NOT A FUCKING RANDOM NUMBER YOU PULL OUT UNLESS YOU ONLY HAVE TEN

>> No.14542227

>>14538965
Until 17 seconds in I thought it was one of those videos just designed to trigger people with OCD.
But I think I've seen a dish like this before. Some Mediterranean shit, right?

>> No.14542267

>>14539952
It was an April Fool's joke. Unfortunately.

>> No.14542281

>>14541670
Have you never had baked mac and cheese before?

>> No.14542469

>>14542281
What does this have to do with their question?

>> No.14542491

>>14541390
I don't get it. Is the implication his dick is in my mouth at the end of the video?

>> No.14542514

>>14538852
that's a 10/10 in britain, both the woman and the meal

>> No.14542515

>>14542491
I was just assuming you'd always be sucking dick so why would it be any different at the end of some video?

>> No.14542526

>>14542491
>Wow! You're not absolutely disgusted by me?

>> No.14542918

>>14539051
I can make the same looking thing in 30 seconds with a cast iron pan full of bacon fat.
Just scramble some eggs with butter cut into it.
Cook bacon.
Remove bacon.
Turn to high heat and wait till smoke.
Dump all eggs in and mix then remove when cooked.
It's gonna cook super fast.

I tried that GR way and it's pretty good but no way in hell am I gonna do it in the morning.

>> No.14542926

>>14539531
Sounds like the DSP of cooking.

>> No.14542933

>>14540400
Niggers can't read cursive

>> No.14542953

>>14541351
>edible assless chaps
please dont encourage the gays

>> No.14542983

>>14541497
>>14538965
it's clearly another one of those fake 5-minute crafts or blossom( or whatever channel that company owns) recipes

>> No.14542988

>>14538847
>Moves head towards food in hand instead of moving hand towards mouth

The madman

>> No.14543017

>>14538890
was fine until they put a second macaroni thing on top of the burger. would work fine as an "open-faced" type of deal with just one macaroni thing and a burger on top

>> No.14543018

>>14540345
It's a very high probability

>> No.14543027

>>14540619
Cook them for longer on a lower temp, use white sugar and not brown, skip the egg

>> No.14543037

Remember this little gem?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-i0UugILBJg

>> No.14543091

>>14541311
You can easily just cut the florets smaller if you ever make this recipe yourself. Although the 5 minutes cook time on that is suspiciously short. I would expect fully cooked cauliflower closer to the 9 or 10 minute mark. Although I dont deep fry much, so I may be wrong.

>> No.14543184

>>14541343
>my religion
>which is alcoholism
It's a condition. Oh, wait...

>> No.14543220
File: 220 KB, 500x692, 1596351693092.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14543220

>>14539874
sauce me bro

>> No.14543295
File: 44 KB, 447x502, Eejm-6IWAAAbrxY.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14543295

>>14541639
why is he doing this ?

>> No.14543302

>>14538928
Fucking nigger idiot

>> No.14543315

>>14538928
HOLA MI GENTE

>> No.14543318

>>14538928
if he used plain sponge instead of cakemix that would be nice

>> No.14543336

>>14542015
that fucking stroke arm gets me every time

>> No.14543387

>>14538795
You probably have the help or w/e buy it on the rich's behalf or getting given it as a bullshit present by friends or brown-nosers.

>> No.14543393

>>14538869
> tfw now unsure whether an ugly woman is just an ugly woman or a tranny
The future is now.

>> No.14543398

>>14538923
> Aly Weisman
Imagine my shock.

>> No.14543416

>>14538852
>it's a British show
>steak americano
Based real life shitpost

>> No.14543520

>>14543091
No, it's pretty suspect. Something that size I'd assume they'd partially cook before frying or finish it off in an oven.

>> No.14543565

>>14538853
nah thats some british slag 100%

>> No.14543567
File: 2.97 MB, 900x506, 1474410556962.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14543567

>> No.14543568

>>14538880
that has to be the only decent thing jack ever made
im impressed

>> No.14543584

>>14541343
It's the complete opposite. Drinking straight alcohol is a shit tasting trash drug for normalfags and hobos. Food made with alcohol is food of the gods.

>> No.14543614

>>14539529
its wet cold island in the atalntic
they dont have any spices there naturally, and it was to expenisve to import them back in hte day the strongest thing for flavouring they have is fermented fish and salt

>> No.14543617

>>14539537
he molests poor thai children in his spare time

>> No.14543623

>>14543617
lets be fair here, its only the boys he molests.

>> No.14543625

>>14543623
what about the ladyboys though?

>> No.14543635
File: 184 KB, 1064x1072, 1595197776816.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14543635

>>14543625
two sexes.

>> No.14543640

>>14543635
yeah but does he molest them?
lady boys are boys but they look like girls and so i wonder if he molests them

>> No.14543645

>>14540519
Fuck that looks good, risotto is the one Italian dish I always mess up.

>> No.14543652

>>14543640
fuck man, you are staring awful deep into that abyss. thanks, but im fine with the view from here.

>> No.14543657

>>14543652
no but think about it
if he molests little boys it means that hes attracted to their masculine qualities, so it would mean hes not into ladyboys but on the other hand ladyboys still have dicks so he could still be attracted to feminized males, and since hes a fag it would make sense to be attracted to the degraded ladyboys

>> No.14543669

>>14543657
hey, maybe he subscribes to a hole being a hole. hell, maybe he just need his daily dose of boy milk and thats all that matters.

>> No.14543729

>>14539051
I like Ramsay but he is so fucking pretentious regarding scrambled eggs it's not even funny. Fuck his eggs.

>> No.14543762
File: 2.93 MB, 640x360, Cute_pancakes.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14543762

>> No.14544047

>>14540519
>sweet onion
que?

>> No.14544054

>>14544047
Means mild flavor/smell, like vidalia onions

>> No.14544088

>>14539536
>restaurant sends the boy chicken after hearing his story
>his story
What fucking story? A dumb, fat child was playing with a poster and the fucking media made it seem as if he was going through some horrific plight. This is a non-story, this is nothing, why was this covered to begin with? Why would they waste people's time with something so utterly fucking meaningless?

>> No.14544098

>>14540372
>pic
Is that the surly king of the egg fort I've been hearing so much about?

>> No.14544102

>>14544088
>This is a non-story, this is nothing, why was this covered to begin with? Why would they waste people's time with something so utterly fucking meaningless?
>what is a promotional fluff piece?
anon plz.

>> No.14544137

>>14544088
Most news media at this point unimportant and just a form of shilling.

>> No.14544533

>>14539051
just put a bit of milk into it before you dump it on the pan; fucks sake

>> No.14544537

>>14543762
how

>> No.14544539

>>14542988
His arm is dead

>> No.14544545

>>14543184
I just dropped in to see what condition my condition was in

>> No.14544557
File: 2.49 MB, 500x324, 1596681574397.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14544557

>>14543762
>tfw no cute pancake gf

>> No.14544571

>>14543584
So it's war then

>> No.14544573
File: 1.01 MB, 480x358, 1594781852321.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14544573

>>14541876
>hey that looks decent
>drowns it in shitty salsa

>> No.14544588
File: 46 KB, 1125x716, 1596928546090.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14544588

>>14543762
>some nigga is better at pancake drawring than you are at normal drawring

>> No.14544638

>>14544539
so is his brain. nothing can prevent jack from molesting food.

>> No.14544649
File: 289 KB, 320x564, [Unlimited Egg Works].webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14544649

>>14541984
I am the bone of my egg
Shell is my body
And yolk is my blood
I have created over a thousand eggy breads
Unknown to sanitation
Nor known to health inspectors
Have withstood heat to create many omelettes
Yet, those hands shall never leave the fort
So, as I pray: UNLIMITED EGG FORTS!

Here I come, Surly King of Heroes. Do you have enough eggs in stock?

>> No.14544670
File: 30 KB, 500x351, 235235252533-min.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14544670

>>14538853
The fuck is an latinx? We don't have hispanic extraterrestrials here.

>> No.14544675

>>14544670
its like a twink but fatter

>> No.14544677

>>14544670
It's a fake word made by "white people" (jews) designed to neuter our beautiful language

>> No.14544842

>>14541984
Thats a good thing though. The rate of newfags coming here make forced memes overstay their welcome

>> No.14544850

>>14541876
>starts sliding out of the pan lookong like a liquid
>starts folding in on itself and you think its just going to be a pile of slop
>it actually folds perfectly in half, a beautiful sight to behold
>proceeds to drizzle dry chunky salsa on the top

>> No.14544865

>>14544670
latino/latina
i dont know what one to use because i cant tell if its a tranny or an actual woman

>> No.14544877
File: 19 KB, 405x540, 1597035330144.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14544877

>>14544850

>> No.14545143

>>14540324
Why not call it what it is. A fucking deep fried cauliflower. Its not bad but TVP has more flavour if spiced correctly. Fuck vegans.

>> No.14545839
File: 2.87 MB, 400x400, Chinese-style ‘1-2-3-4-5-6’ One-pot Chinese Ribs.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14545839

>> No.14546139
File: 2.78 MB, 1920x1080, jack15.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14546139

>>14544850
He's a true connoisseur

>> No.14546186

>>14546139
>grating chocolate on vegetables
Excuse me?

>> No.14546198

honestly, it is likely that > 2 hours of my life has passed watching jack in webm threads

>> No.14546210

>>14546186
Chocolate is like salt, it brings out the flavor of other ingredients

>> No.14546234

>>14546186
>>14546210
That could work if done by someone who knows how to cook. Sweet is a generally underused taste in a lot of dishes.
I'm sure Jack fucked it up, though

>> No.14546362

>>14540043
I'm surprised they're using the right side of the knife to cut.

>> No.14546411

>>14538890
made me kek hard well done

>> No.14546443
File: 22 KB, 550x283, EP4LAkDVUAIOdjQ.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14546443

>>14538923
i hate this woman. i hate this woman. i hate her so fucking much. ooo christ i hate this annoying fucking woman. i would chimp out. i would tear her face off. i would rend the flesh from her bones. i would stick her in a stew--an avocado stew. i would watch her flail around like a lobotomite and i would hate her even more even though i know i am the cause. i hate her. i want to crush her with a mallet. i want the mallet to pound her into dust and echoes. i want to hold the world in my hands and pluck her from wherever she may be and fling her out into the cosmos, and she will flail, and i know she will flail, and i will hate her. hate.

>> No.14546467
File: 75 KB, 1242x1134, 1592134870495.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14546467

>>14543567

>> No.14546471

>>14540433
WHAT TONGUE THING HOMIE

>> No.14546583

>>14546471
newfag

>> No.14546764

How come nobodies posted Kays Good Cooking?

>> No.14546783

>>14546764
Because we've seen all of them a million fucking times? Why even have a thread if it's the same fucking reposts?

>> No.14546813

>>14546783
same applies to the Jack stuff....

>> No.14546834

>>14546813
Yes.

>> No.14546921

>>14539855
not much worse for you than putting mayo on a burger honestly

>> No.14546963

>>14546813
jack is sexier

>> No.14547127

>>14546764
Because she doesn't have the arrogance that Jack has. Kay actually tries and fails but admits it

>> No.14547551

>>14540127
i wana stick my dick in that pickle

>>
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