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Thread for webms of food and cooking
>>14364007This one always makes me smile a bit
I got full on videos if anybody is interested ;3https://volafile.org/r/bwekfast
>>14363827>first recipe uses 3>third uses 6>fourth uses 4>fifth uses 7
>>14366342turks aren't arabs though
>>14363831Interesting but also retarded
>>14363825I would eat but why make a desert that looks like a burger? Just give me a normal desert so my brain doesn't get confused
>>14366549>Just give me a normal desert so my brain doesn't get confusedImagine having so low IQ you get confused by desserts
>>14366549Some michelin star restaurants do this specifically to confuse the tastebuds momentarily, subverting one's expectation for the sake of "cerebral theatre”.https://youtu.be/PGoert85Yho
>>14363825Thanks for this, OP. I really like this idea for a thread and am already enjoying the content so far.
>>14366598I'm retarded. https://youtu.be/g4HFu_bkUak
>>143658025+3+6+4+7 = 2525/5=5
>>14366549Because it's an april fool's joke. It's not an actual food item.
>>14366648Common Core as fuck
>>14366975/the fuck is hotdog juice
>>14363831have a little fun before you use the helium tank for what you bought it for
>>14366980god i hate americans so much
>>14367037Don't get the pasta water meme
>>14367059Contains starches from cooking the pasta.
>>14364230kek, I like to think this dudes neck isn't all fat but instead a pouch like a pelican where all the fluids get deposited from his many mighty chugs
>>14366342Inb4 that troll who always tries to convince the newbies that it's some kind of trick done with hot sand.
>>14366666Checked.I bet people saw that advert and tried to order the fucking thing.
>>14363849egg is criminally overcooked
>>14367010Why not just have the legs on it all the time?
>>14363855thats Terry isnt it. what a chad. getting in on the buffet before the hordes of chinese clean it out.
>>14364230>nobody ever got fat behind their own back- ricky gervais
>>14367771Chinese mokou is worse than wojack.
>>14367769Maybe I'm not enough of an oldfag to get the reference.Or maybe you, for some reason, think only oldfags know what an exit bag is.
>>14367844I would never do something like this with popcorn of all things, but I sometimes mess around with colourings when I hang out with my cousin's daughter. (She's seven so it's "hanging out" and definitely NOT "babysitting")I don't care much for adults doing stuff like that to celebrate the fact that their lives revolve entirely around sexual preference.I don't have any pics, sorry. We mostly do it with doughs and batters and rice. Works with small potatoes too. They look really cool when you cut them afterwards.
Link as it has audio. This is how I picture most /ck/ postershttps://i.4cdn.org/gif/1594234368196.webm
>>14364007that looked good
>>14368385pretty fucking bougie for bbqi'm guessing this is one of the californian attempts?
>>14368385Price seems fair
>>14366989God I wish.
>>14366681What the fuck
>>14368479Plenty of faggy BBQ joints in TX
>>14368923It looks like an obtuse way of introducing algebra before teaching variables.
>>14368963It;s actually designed to hold bright kids back so all students learn at the same speed.Common Core math is fucked up
>>14368973Eating with spoons out of a shared bowl is fucking disgusting.
>>14366681>>14368923>>14368963>>14368973the language is wrong it should be 'while' not 'when'
>>14366995looks dry as fuck
>>14368479Franklin's in Austin, TXIt's pretty pretentious but tastes really good. Not worth the wait usually though
>>14367059Starch leftover from cooking the pasta is great and helping emulsify sauces and making them generally thicker, especially since it's something you're going to have on hand anyway might as well use it.
>>14366980>those fat hands
>>14369503Its goddamn 1 and if you answer differently you're goddamn wrong
>>14369503Do americans even learn pedmas or is american math class just eating cupcakes covered in cheese for an hour?
>>14369590Its PEMDAS you eurotrash
>>14369596It's the same thing though
>>14367068top tier recipe, I don't make many of the ones I see here but this was simple and excellent.
>>14369608You moment you see someone reference PEMDAS or BODMAS or whatever the fuck is how you tell in an instant that they know nothing whatsoever about numbers.
>>14367027I would honestly just skip the whole sandwich part, shred the pork up in the stew and just have it like that, maybe broil the cheese on top French onion style
>>14368385I would absolutely pay like 100 bucks for the whole platter with all the sides and a pitcher of beer and I would tip the waitress good
>>14367605that poor hen
So many of these webm's need to be sped up
>>14367748it's a grocery store
>>14369831mmm, chicken mcnuggets.
>>14369831The sound is vital to the enjoyment of this webm. Without it it's kinda sad, with it it's hilarious. Massive amounts of chirping, a sudden grinding noise, then silence.
>>14367268>garlic clove>garlic powderbut why?
>>14370296Oh Bill is the only webm that actually requires sound
>>14363825maybe I'm just high but that looks good as fuck.
>>14368973why didn't they lift the seat
This thread is missing something... but what?
>>14370833>overcooked bottoms>smashes the egg yolks on their landingwhat's the fucking point
>>14370842You still have to eat all the eggs.
>>14370833can it be described as perfect if the yolks are all smashed?
>>14370853Fine, be that way.
>>14370855>fat free half-and-halfChrist almighty.
>>14370909>>14370914I'VE CONQUERED ALL THE CHIPPYSI'M NEVER GONNA STOPCHIPS AND PEAS AND GRAVYI'VE ATE THE FUCKING LOTPEPPERONI PIZZA AND CHICKEN VINDALOOI'M A BIG FAT BASTARDCOS I LOVE MY FUCKING FOODALLEZ ALLEZ ALLEZALLEZ ALLEZ ALLEZ
>>14363827What would be a good sub for sirachia for the zucchini one?
>>14370898Why do retards put cheese on fish, the two almost never go together.
>>14370924It's just chili sauce, crushed chili flakes are better
>>14370914Holy fuck do amerilards REALLY
>>14370950I don't think that's American
>>14370954The signs on the wall at the start are in english, so it's gotta be somewhere in north america or the british islands.
>>143695039. Bedmas. Brackets 1+2=3. Exponent (none) . Divide 6÷2=3. Multiply 3×3=9. Add (none left to add) subtract (none).
>>14370884>>14370004>>14370960A formula written in that format is the same as writing 6 / (2*(1+2)) in any context, and if you don't know this then you don't actually do any math for a living.
>>14370959It's the latter.
>>14370966>my solution works if I add brackets where there are nonesad
>>14370966I don't do math for a living. Just going by what my boomer teachers taught me in school 20 years ago. So the answer is 1?
>>14369590I don't think I was ever taught the acronym. I'm not sure how I was taught the order of operations. I just remember it.
>>14364007fuck you, i laughed
>>14370966People who do math for a living are giving out the troll answers
>>14366980look at those fat hands
>>14371011I would love to have those fat hands tickle my prostate.
>>14363831>helium is a finite resource vital for usage in medical science and various other fields of research>these assholes are wasting it on party favorsA N G E R Y
>>14371036Tell your congressman, not us
>>14371036Just get some more from the sun. The entire thing is pretty much helium.
>>14371036>helium is finite>second most common element in the universe>sun is 25% heliumDon't trust anything that the Jews say.
>>14371059>>14371052How do we harvest helium from the sun if the tube melts on the way there? Should we do it at night?
>>14371090Just mine during winter......
>>14371059Helium is rare on Earth because it's so much lighter than our atmosphere. You're right about how plentiful it is in the universe, though. I think God meant it as a metaphor for love. There is so much out there, but it's so hard to obtain.
>>14371090You harvest at night, dumbass
you fags need to shut up and post webms
>>14371119I meant solar night.
>>14370950Bruh, no one here does that fetid chip-shop shit run by Pakistanis. That's UK. Especially with fries like that, served with a brown sauce. No one does that it burgerland.
>>14371240That's curry sauce, it's like gravy with turmeric in it
>>14370966You added brackets, that changes it.
>>14371277Yeah changes it from one that uses the obelus which is inherently ambiguous to one that actually has a unique interpretation.That said if you ever use the obelus for anything at all without enough brackets to make it clear what you actually mean you don't do math for a living either.
>>14371125but how does it get out
>>14363831If I'm buying a helium tank, it's going to be for one thing and it ain't edible balloons.
>>14366555Wlhat is this show?
>>14367646I remember this commercial. Liked it as a kid. Hate it as an adult.
>>14367658never understoond egg purists>muh runny egg
>>14371565Overcooked eggs taste like rubber.
>>14369503There's multiple answers to this equation.
>>14370914me at 0:01
>>14371258God, Jack is an utter buffoon.
>>14371565Compare and contrast:Eggs done correctly: yolk is runny, perfect for dipping your toast in, and tastes appropriately custardy. Whites have good consistency and melt in your mouth.Vs overcooked egg: yolk has hardened and taken on a chalky texture. Whites have become rubbery and chewy.It's not even a contest.
>>14370959Id assume Canada because of the syrup. Nothing in the webm reminds me of Britain
>>14370370It's a fat, white woman making a "healthy" Mexican lasagna. You didn't expect it to make sense did you?
>>14369307Mom found the meatsock.
>>14367004This is the most fucking stupid thing I've ever seen
>>14366342pipes under sand
>>14367027wow I sure do love soggy bread.
>>14368038>putting BBs on tophuh?
>>14368312on the one hand I find that linked video kinda funny but I also am deeply saddened by it for some reason, maybe its because she sounds almost exactly like my niece.
>>14372488cupcake pearls, they taste like shit
>>14371740such a shame to do all that and not at least make your own bread.
>>14372540I know right, bet he didn't even slaughter his own pig either
>>14363849Why not cook the hash, sausage and egg in the fat of the bacon?
>>14366681As a parent that would make me explode on the spot.
>>14367008To what gain
>>14363855Based soup pirate
>>14371706I don't like his cooking either but his disability isn't really his fault. Except for eating like shit.
>>14367658>overcookedPerfect egg right there, actually I would prefer it not to have raw yolk whatsoever.
>>14371760Raw yolk and white is just gross. It takes like cum, especially the whites if they're left raw too.Cooked through yolk is creamy, and cooked whites are bouncy in texture. Crispy edges only enhances the egg.Fuck you and fuck off runny egg faggots, just go suck a cock if you want something warm and creamy in your mouth.
>>14372785Who's talking about raw?
>>14371333I don't care if your job requires you to know you use 2 patties on a mcdouble. No one does. Stop being wrong.
>>14370872needs some bacon and cream cheese i think
>>14368973>>14368963i think the point is poorly explained, but common core is how most people would do simple math in their heads. essentially, you're breaking down the numbers to make the calculations simpler in your head.for example 13+28, you can do 2+28 = 30, then 30+11 = 41
>>14372498lol this recipe fucking blows.
>>14373117What I don't understand is why anyone thought this was even necessary.
>>14370898this is so much worse than the first one. why are you making me look at this
>>14373117that's a retarded heuristic...10+20+3+8
>>14371752Japanese pizza is the worst
>>14368973why are germans so fucking scatalogical
>>1437327528+3+10 is how I would do it.
>>14370863This shit was never fucking funny
>>14366681>Tell how to make 10 when adding 8+5By using a base 13 system.
>>14373427Yes it is
>>14373438Based tredecimal system
>>14373339It really isn't. Pizza toast sucks, but that isn't the same thing (and that webm is basically a variation on pizza toast).
>>14371336>he thinks it can leave
>>14373422I would do it 10+20+10+1 I always just take all the extras away then add up the tens then while adding all the other numbers to make more tens
>>14363831The visual and concept is cool I guess, but it's just going to taste like simple syrup.
>>14370934Dumb statement. Different fish taste different, different cheeses taste different. Never the twain shall meet? lmao at your inexperience with flavor profiles.
>>14366523wheres the rest?
>>14372771His disability is a result of poor decisions with regards to exercise and diet over a long period of time. He has two brothers who are both reasonably fit and healthy so it's hard to say it was his upbringing or genetics alone.
>>14371569Wait a minute, how does he get out?
>>14373923Why would he eggscape?
>>14367060this is a relic from a better time, bless that loading symbol part way though
>>14363849>segregation of the juices what is this autism
>>14373422it's the same you want to minimize operations don't fucking mix subtracting and adding
>>14373438i swear if my child's teacher was like this i would show up and berate her (I already know it's a she, and my ma is a math wizard) until she cries
>>14363825Gay and nasty
>>14374058Just like ur mom
>>14366980The hands of a child
>>14374042Gay and shit.
>>14367898Anyone have the Forbidden Sip webm where the guy appears to be drinking mercury
>>14374222trips of BASED
>>14364007I want to ________ your milky meat pads
>>14373457You must be 18 to post here.
>>14363831>doesnt show anyone attempting to eat itkek
>>14374670Presumably you bite into it and it pops like a gum bubble
>>14373985Yes you are such a big boy because you don't like humor. Everyone here is very impressed with your intelligent comment.
>>14370898Europeens and their shitty avocados LMAO
>>14370914How much would this cost USD? That's gotta be 7 pounds of "food"
>>14366681lmao>everyday we stray further from God's light
>>14373911You can still have compassion for those in a shitty spot. I make fun of his awful, awful cooking instructions all the time but I still realize that must suck dick to have a limp arm
for the love of god somebody post it! we're running out of time!
>>14374042this is interesting only insofar as it is an absolute exemplary example of "reddit" type humor. what causes one to take this path in life? to find this humorous? the 4chan / reddit divide will never cease to amaze me, it's as though we inhabit entirely different universes.
>>14370370I was going to say texture until Karen put that shit in the blender
>>14374222Wouldn't he be fine as long as he didn't have an ulcer?
>>14371258>>14374880damn, how could you watch this guys vids and support this guy?https://downwithjackscalfani.wordpress.com/jack-scalfanis-atrocious-behaviour/
>>14374939Here you go anon.https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/mercury-and-health>Although mercury is poisonous (toxic), it usually only causes problems if you inhale large amounts of it. Very little mercury is absorbed by your body if you swallow a small amount of liquid mercury or get it on your skin for a short time. This is considered almost non-toxic and you'll probably have no symptoms.
>>14369781based monkey man
>>14375096true that. my parents talked abot playing with it as kids.that doesn't mean im drinking that shit tho
>>14374880He is also an awful person and hateful drama queen.>>14375009I don't support him.
>>14375171If you made that webm you need to learn to fucking edit.
>>14371125how have africans and brazilians not come up with the technology to make one of these to put a person inside of?
>>14367723why don't you stand all the time?
>>14375416Edgy teen alert. Watch out for this one boys, we have an expert anthropologist on our hands.
>>14375513How did his post offend you?
>>14375519Oh he's an expert at redirection too! Better be careful boys!
>>14368038I'm going to make these for my new gender announcement day.
PLEASE GOD POST THE SURLY KING
>>14373911*half brothersyou may not realize it but the half they ain't was a fat gluttonous retard
>>14368979The language isn't really wrong, "when" implies that it's during the action, the same as "while"."when driving, one must always remember to watch for merging traffic"People here are just retards and can't think outside of their ridgid boxes, so a simple logic question like this stumps them.
>>14375991damn those sushis look like shiti want to fuck her in her cornhole
>>14370934Cod au gratin, my man. Shit's great
>>14371752Holy fuck... nuke 'em again.
>>14371752Lmao triggering all the tomato pie faggots
>>14376021She is very fuckable
>>14376021i gotchu senpai
>>14374894Exactly this, and I feel the same about that stupid "vampire kryptonite" shit. I might do that when cooking with my 7yo nephew to make him laugh but fuck finding it funny as a 30yo.
Your thread has been high /jack/ed
>>14374894>>14376705Yes you are such big boys for not finding it funny. We are all so proud of how grown up you are, you are very mature.
>>14376738That's so much turmeric
>>14376740How can man this incompetent in everything live in a house that big and have such a wealth to maintain it.I'm starting to believe in whatever protestant pentecostal bullshit he believes in.
>>14376738>a ton of basil>a ton of turmeric>itty bitty shake of chili powderI can't imagine how fucked up that would taste.
>>14372785Raw yolk tastes a lot better than cum.
>>14372785Why not have my squishy eggs with some of my boyfriend's cum on top?
>>14376942Simpsons did it.
>>14375009>Jack Scalfani is a racist>Jack Scalfani is a misogynist>Jack Scalfani is a homophobe
>>14377197You conveniently forgot the part where he beats his kids and wife, even strangled his 9 year old until his nose bled, then kicked him out at 16 causing him to be homeless.
>>14377211How and why the fuck did he admit to this in a video about cooking?
>>14363831looks like used condoms
>>14377225Crazy people be crazy. Even with all that shit he still claims to be the nicest guy on YouTube. He's an insane retard.
>>14370847just put the egg on a rocket and shoot it into the sun
>>14370868omg im having a oh i have a jesus christ it's my eggrection
>>14371752>invent abortion of a food>call it "foreign country food"
>>14370868fuck that faggots face is irritating
>>14376728HE SLAM INTO TABLEI LAUGH
>>14374222rip grandpayour jokey jokes were the bestill miss u ;_;
>>14376297ah yes, the graywho doesn't love a gray in the morning?
>>14375009>Jack is a racist who called for genocide of the Middle East via napalmHoly fucking based.
>fat retarded redneck has retarded redneck opinionsI am shocked
>>14376738>how much turmeric, daddy?about ten clumps, son
>>14377289Yes very mature an intelligent post. You are right, big boys don't like this type of humor. Being picky and not liking things is what being an adult is all about.
>>14376740my fucking god, just follow the instructions
>>14367658Try and cook a perfect egg with a raging hangover
>>14377376Nice, I'm glad that you continue to show everyone here that you are a big boy. Very impressive!
>>14367027Do Americans really?
>>14377463This is a Portuguese dish. Are euros really illiterate?
>>14370879was that their first try? they really should have practiced a bit before recording that
>>14376937STOP IT JACK ITS ALREADY DEAD AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
>>14378289I've always though the way that red bell pepper (?) came out of the jar seemed absolutely foul.
>>14378655They're just roasted red bell peppers. They peel the skin and pack them in the jar in water. Probably the least offensive thing in the damn recipe.