/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.14063178]

Why do female baristas have no problem pulling a good espresso shot (at least 85% as good as a male barista) but they CONSISTENTLY fuck up the pourovers? Bitch just dribble some hot water on the grounds in a circular motion taking care to avoid hitting the paper once you notice there's no standing water visible, how hard is that?

>but hurr hurr baristas r dumb

They can work a register and that's significantly harder, most of them are in college which is more than I can say about you, what's the problem here?

[Anonymous No.14063184]

*brap*
*sniff*
*belch*

[Anonymous No.14063213]

This Jezebel is really activating my almonds

[Anonymous No.14063215]

>>14063178
Why would anyone use paper filter anything when full metal french presses exist?
No I mean really, I'm curious.
I'm by no means a coffee snob, but I have been using a full metal french press for years for the convinience of it and can't even fathom any other method to make coffee.
Exept traditional coffee pot coffee.

[Anonymous No.14063224]

Barista? You mean a fucking waitress? Speak English Frenchie bitch.

[Anonymous No.14063240]

>>14063215
French press is shit though
If I want aggressive oils I’ll take espresso

[Anonymous No.14063263]

>coffee general: ignored
>bait coomer picture: checked
>shitty stupid thread: checked
>buzzwords: checked

Back to >>>/r/eddit and mass report this idiot

[Anonymous No.14063268]

>>14063240
>is shit
could you maybe elaborate a little bit, because it was quite a spesific and relatively easy question
please

[Anonymous No.14063295]

>>14063268
he literally explained why

[Anonymous No.14063338]

>>14063295
What does aggressive oil taste like?

[Anonymous No.14063354]

>>14063178
That is disgusting and unsanitary.
Where's the slut patrol when you need it?
Thirsty fucking simps need to be beaten until they stop showing these pigs attention.

[Anonymous No.14063355]

>>14063178
>bikini baristas
this must be the most disappointing experience as a customer. see sexy baristas on instagram. go to local place and catch a 5 second glimpse of the barista through the drive-thru before tipping on an ipad. pass me on that weak shit

[Anonymous No.14063363]

>>14063338
I can't tell you what things taste "like" to you. Presumably you accept that there are perceptible differences between a mesh metal filter and a paper filter, yes? Since you did express a preference for one over the other? Or is it going to be "even EXPERTS can't tell the difference" while pretending first hand experience is too anti-science?

[Anonymous No.14063368]

>>14063355
>drive-through coffee shops
Do they really do that in the land of the free?

[Anonymous No.14063377]

>>14063368
A common practice because people are trying to get to work and this is more expedient than parking, getting out, waiting in line, ordering, etc

[Anonymous No.14063382]

>>14063377
Get in the cagie, wagie!

[Anonymous No.14063386]

>>14063363
Well yes. I said that I use the french press mainly for convinience because maintaining it is easier than maintaining a traditional drip coffee maker. 99% of the time the regular coffe makers are maintained so poorly that they make terrible coffee.
French press coffee tastes less bitter when comparing the two, but I have no idea or even a reference point on what less oily coffee would taste like.

[Anonymous No.14063390]

>>14063178
I once ordered a venti cold brew from Starbucks and it was filled all the way to the top with ice. I probably got 8 or 10 ounces of coffee.

Just fill it about a 1/4 or even 1/3 with ice it’s so ez

[Anonymous No.14063400]

>>14063390
You realize that's how corporate tells them to do it, right?

[Anonymous No.14063402]

>>14063386
What are you talking about? French press has way more shit that absorbs stale odors and grows mold

>every 2 weeks unscrew a retaining bolt, disassemble multiple layers of springs, bushings, meshes, and grills
>boil it all in sodium laureth sulfate and sodium carbonate
>air dry and reassemble

vs.

>discard filter
>wipe with a wet sponge
>drip dry
>once a year boil in baking soda

I don't think you really understand why your coffee sucks

[Anonymous No.14063403]

>>14063400
Yeah. I usually ask for little ice

[Anonymous No.14063425]

>>14063215
Dude. A good paper filter is tasteless and offers the right amount of resistance for the liquid to pour at the right duration to extract only the most readily available chemicals/flavors of the grounds. It’s a completely different cup of coffee than french press, which is going to be more bitter and you’re going to have a harder time determining the unique qualities of the bean. Of course if you just drink darker roasts, pour over is a waste a time. There’s no way to execute a good lighter roast in a french press. It will aways over extract.

[Anonymous No.14063441]

>>14063402
My coffee is fucking great and I never claimed otherwise.
I’ve been using this same thing for about 3 years basically every day.
I just think this method is less of a hassle than maintaining a machine.

[Anonymous No.14063448]

Why did this literal retard say working a register was hard?
>STOMP STOMP CLAP

[Anonymous No.14063469]

>>14063425
Maybe I should try a pour over sometime. I just don't have a pot or a thing to do that in and I think I'm done with machines, they're always such a hassle.
Is it okay to just pour boiling water straight out of a pot in a pour over or do you need to fiddle with the temperature or something? Is straight boiling okay?

[Anonymous No.14063485]

>>14063441
How in the fuck is a solid block of glazed ceramic MORE hassle than that nightmare mess?

[Anonymous No.14063508]

>>14063485
This is a drip coffee maker.

[Anonymous No.14063511]

>>14063469
>Is it okay to just pour boiling water straight out of a pot in a pour over or do you need to fiddle with the temperature or something?
Look up Hoffman’s v60 method in jewtube. You’ll get all info you need there.
>Is straight boiling okay?
The lighter the roast the hotter thenwater should be for extraction

[Anonymous No.14063520]

>>14063508
You asked why anyone would use a pourover, not why anyone would use an auto drip. In any case as the other guy noted, if you're drinking dark roast none of this matters anyway because all you're tasting is ashes.

[Anonymous No.14063522]

>>14063485
Would you have difficulty assembling that consistently or what gives?

[Anonymous No.14063525]

>>14063522
I'm not the one bitching about how complicated a piece of ceramic is compared to a french press

[Anonymous No.14063544]

>>14063520
I just wanted to know what difference a filter makes because I see it as pointless having used what I have. And funnily enough even more of a hassle because I have to make sure that I actually have the filters.
And the other guy was actually nice enough that he explained it clearly and didn't pull this riddler act like somebody else.
I use a light roast though. I let it sit in the pot for 4 minutes and then push the press down.
Perfect every time

[Anonymous No.14063549]

>>14063525
I already told you many times that I'm talking about a drip coffe maker so you are now pulling this what is it call a strawman?
I bet you don't know in what order those parts go in haha :D

[Anonymous No.14063555]

>>14063549
>>14063544
It's funny because it's clear which posts are yours but you seem to be getting confused over which ones are mine, while also pretending to not have posted things you definitely did post.

[Anonymous No.14063560]

>>14063178
Because if she does something correctly, she'll be expected to do it again. And nothing terrifies women more than responsibility.

[Anonymous No.14063577]

>>14063555
What's funny about that?
Anon, you're not psychoanalyzing me trought these posts are you?
>while also pretending
I started talking about coffe makers at the very beginning even if my initial question was concerning just filters. You are the one that insisted that we are spesifically talking about pour overs.

[Anonymous No.14063710]

>>14063178
What type of shitty cafe serves pourovers? That's like going to a restaurant and getting a TV dinner.

[Anonymous No.14063719]

>>14063710
>$27 for a bag of coffee vs $4 for a cup
It's a good way to try small batch guest coffees without committing to a whole bag.
>b-but it's cheaper at home!
Sure, so is taking caffeine pills

[Anonymous No.14063805]

>>14063178

[Anonymous No.14063832]

>>14063355
>tip cash, get flashed
they also will point out which of their coworkers fucks for cash/drugs.

[Anonymous No.14063842]

>>14063832
How do you initiate that conversation without making things awkward?

[Anonymous No.14063860]

>>14063577
>>14063555
samefag

[Anonymous No.14063910]

>>14063842
>asking to pay for sex from strangers
>without making things awkward
grow a spine, show up when it ain't busy, don't directly proposition the person you're speaking with, ask them if they know anyone on the roster who is open to it or brags about it.

[Anonymous No.14063935]

>>14063910
When you say "it" are we talking like, "does anyone here have sex for money" in those exact words?

Should I lick my lips before or after I ask?

[Anonymous No.14064665]

>>14063935
>>14063910
pls respond

[Anonymous No.14064671]

>>14063402
just say soap you colossal bitchnozzle

[Anonymous No.14064676]

>>14063935
only lick your lips if you still have semen on them

[Anonymous No.14064677]

>>14064665
What you want to do
>walk up
>glance around a few times
>lean over the counter
>do you know where, uh, where... i cpuld get some (jerking off hand motion) "hot coffee" around here?

[Anonymous No.14064679]

>>14064665
just be yourself

[Anonymous No.14064746]

>>14063178
imagine the vinegary espresso shits

[Anonymous No.14064778]

>>14063215
>Exept traditional coffee pot coffee.
So with filters then

[Anonymous No.14064811]

>>14063544
To answer your question, filters actually make cleanup LOADS easier. You just dump the shit into the trash. With a french press, even though you're not spending money on single use filters, you still have to scoop all the grounds out of the bottom, shake the plunger clean, and then rinse everything. And that's only if you're deliberately not cleaning it thoroughly.
Also making sure that you actually have filters is easy if you have a box of hundreds of them and you remember to add it to your shopping list whenever you get low. In that regard it's not more of a hassle than buying toilet paper.

[Anonymous No.14064839]

>>14063368
yeah but they dont have drive through liquor stores, it's weird.

[Anonymous No.14064844]

Filters get rid of the sediment.

[Anonymous No.14064859]

>>14064844
>Plastic

[Anonymous No.14064875]

>>14064839
I've seen a few in Wisconsin my friend

[Anonymous No.14064887]

>>14064839
woah woah we have drive through tobacco stores and drive thru liquor stores.

[Anonymous No.14064932]

>>14063178
I know this girl. She's asexual.

[Anonymous No.14065011]

>>14064932
>le asexual sex worker has arrived

[Anonymous No.14065092]

>>14064932
NOTHING turns me on more than women who physically cannot derive pleasure from sex

this is how women should be, this is how god meant them to be

[Anonymous No.14065149]

>>14065092
Alhamdulillah brother

[Johnny Bravo No.14065160]

>>14065092
Sounds like a pretty weak-ass god if there are women who are a different way than it meant them to be.

[Anonymous No.14065202]

>>14064932
Extremely based. Liberated from sexuality to produce a good cup of espresso. That being said, she's just a model/cosplayer, right? Can't imagine a business having such slack safety standards when handling hot liquid regularly.

[Anonymous No.14065213]

>>14063178
I wish coomer posting was a bannable offense

[Anonymous No.14065225]

>>14065202
she could handle my hot liquid on her face if you understand the implications of my statement

[Anonymous No.14065231]

>>14063485
Because you have to hide it everytime it's not in use, otherwise guests will assume you are a retarded faggot for owning one.

[ϟϟSCHUTZSTAFFELϟϟ !JuN.8Ir9OE No.14065237]

>>14063363
This post is a dodge.

[Anonymous No.14065241]

>>14065225
Nah, that shit's just lukewarm.

[ϟϟSCHUTZSTAFFELϟϟ !JuN.8Ir9OE No.14065277]

>>14065092
>this is how god meant them to be
If that were true He wouldn't have given them clitorises or any major nerve tissue in the genitals. But He did.

[Anonymous No.14065287]

>>14065202
if I were as rich as Bezos I'd create a new genre of restos staffed by beautiful femoids whose sin has been biologically removed by the finest scientists on earth who would be paid handsome sums for their expertise. Obviously these new baristas would still have a way to poo and pee but for example no nipples, belly button, or vagina. And when I say no vag I mean no vag, not even a fold. Obviously, perfect A cups, but again no nipples. Tattoos would be impossible because their brains would be genetically engineered not to make mistakes like that. They would be grown in international waters and cultivated/trained for the sole purpose of making good espresso and pourovers the right way. Also they wouldn't have vocal cords and after work they'd be stored in boxes under the work area. A factory option would be to order one without a mouth. This would become a thing for people to factionalize over, much as people argue about if phones should have removable storage today.

While I wouldn't make it obvious, it would soon BECOME obvious that the original sin of femoids makes them unsuitable for life in a modern, future oriented society. Consumers would a new upgraded model in their home. At first it would be a fashionable luxury for the very well off but within a few years everyone would have a sinless femoid. And thus, legacy femoids would become as rare as, say, a beige tower with wires coming out of the back. Or a car that you have to work the steering wheel yourself.

[Anonymous No.14065308]

>>14065287
truly redpilled

[Anonymous No.14065313]

>>14065287
Just put the bitches in shopping carts and be done with it.

[ϟϟSCHUTZSTAFFELϟϟ !JuN.8Ir9OE No.14065352]

>>14065287
>no pussy
>no nipples
What a bore.

[Anonymous No.14065432]

>>14063178
It's because the average barista in America (they aren't proper baristi in the first place, they just serve coffee which is not the sole mansion of an actual Italian barista) has no idea how to operate espresso machines, they have no idea what espresso is supposed to taste like and they burn it by fucking up the pressure of the machine.
t. Italian who visited a few cities in America.

[Anonymous No.14065445]

>>14065313
MODS

[Anonymous No.14065479]

>>14063178
only women order coffee drinks so I wouldn't know

[Anonymous No.14065522]

>>14063178
They get good at that by sucking so much cock and being on casting couches.

[Anonymous No.14065529]

>>14065479
An Irish coffee once every four years or so isn't bad.

[Anonymous No.14065533]

>>14065479
>too many for espresso
Let me guess, only whisky for you?

[Anonymous No.14065539]

>>14065533
too manly to go to a coffee shop. It is absolutely fine to make an espresso for yourself, but to go pay some "baritsta" thats not becoming behavior of a man

[Anonymous No.14065545]

>>14065539
>making espresso at home
Are you trying to tell us that you're loaded, or that you don't know anything about coffee?

[Anonymous No.14065557]

>>14065545
its not that fucking expensive man, if it were something I was passionate about I would absolutely buy the equipment to do it at home

[Anonymous No.14065574]

>>14065557
> if it were something I was passionate about
Well obviously you are since you're too good to pay someone else to work a machine for you

Show us your setup, inb4 you post some 3.5 bar bullshit and a canister of lavazza

[Anonymous No.14065586]

>>14065574
stop going to coffee shops

[Anonymous No.14065591]

>>14065586
Don't really have much control over that right now

Post your setup

[Anonymous No.14065597]

>>14065591
I don't think I was ambiguous before, I am not passionate enough about it to buy the stuff, but if I truly cared I would

[Anonymous No.14065604]

>>14065597
Then why not just say "I don't drink espresso or care about it in any way"

[Anonymous No.14065619]

>>14065604
I mean like I think its good, I don't dislike it in any way

[Anonymous No.14065627]

>>14063178
I've always felt that if your appearance is the best thing about you, you are compensating for a lack of skill. You only have so much attention and energy and her attention and energy clearly gets spent on her looks.

[Anonymous No.14065633]

There isn't a single competent barista in my county. They all underexctact. The owners of the shops know better but they don't care.

[Anonymous No.14065648]

>>14063402
Soap with a touch of ammonia is all you need to cut through the oils that can cause problems in a french press and its parts. That's it. Blue Dawn and a sponge nigga. It's not hard.

[Anonymous No.14065678]

>>14065092
This bitch was raped or sexually abused as a child. Look at her hair, her face, and the cuck coddling her. The only women I know that don't enjoy sex all have the common theme of rape or sexual abuse being something they experienced at a young age. They either turn it off or they desperately try to pretend they are in control by fucking every guy they can.

[Anonymous No.14065689]

>>14065287
holy fucking C R I N G E, nigger.

[Anonymous No.14065698]

>>14065619
What you are saying in essence is that nobody should be allowed to just spend $3 once or twice a week, no they have to dedicate a four-figure sum up front and a significant amount of recurring costs to a home hobby setup that takes an hour to fire up and will literally NEVER pay for itself not in this lifetime and not in many lifetimes because the overhead of operating, maintaining, cleaning, and calibrating everything only makes sense in a high volume operation (note that even most michelin-starred restaurants don't bother with espresso machines). In other words, everyone should be so rich that they think home espresso is totally not an expensive hobby for autistic spergs where the longer you do it the WORSE the accounting looks compared to just doing the buyfag thing.

Or, more likely, you underestimate what it takes to make espresso because, as indicated, you don't know what you're talking about. Which is more consistent with someone who "thinks it's good and doesn't dislike it" (for the record I very much like it, which is why I know what it costs)

>>14065648
What you missed was the part where it sucks for reasons unrelated to cleaning. I was just responding to the tard who thinks a V60 is "too complicated"

[Anonymous No.14065821]

>>14065698
If you think French Press coffee sucks but like Espresso you're a liar. To yourself and to others. Simple as.

[Anonymous No.14065893]

>>14065821
No, I just happen to like coffee. Unlike people who drink terrible period fad coffee from "Friends" or "Party of Five" or whatever, for reasons unknown to me but I assume must be some kind of "ironic" gesture to express an adolescent disdan for everything

[Anonymous No.14065968]

>come into thinly veiled coom thread expecting sexy girl's and barista pusy
>there's actual coffee discussion going on
the fuck?

[Anonymous No.14066007]

>>14065287
>>14065092
based as fucking fuck

[Anonymous No.14066059]

>>14064932
In the off-chance you're not the one lying, then she is. She's pretending. Either because it's trendy to be some sexual deviant and she wants to be special too, or she just likes to play games. She just wants to grab as much attention as possible, but hides behind that stupid story so she can still act innocent.
An actual asexual person wouldn't go to those lengths to look as sexy as legally allowed, because they wouldn't care.

[Anonymous No.14066094]

>>14063485
don't have to buy filters

[Anonymous No.14066134]

>>14066059
Stop LARPing as a psychiatrist, you absolute child
A sex worker's job is to jiggle her butt cheeks for money, her job isn't to enjoy it and she'll do a better job if she doesn't

[Anonymous No.14066143]

>>14066094
You can't buy any less than 300 at a time on amazon. Since most people have and rotate several devices (aeropress, v60, kalitta, etc), that's at least a year's worth of drinking if not more

[Anonymous No.14066225]

>>14066134
Stop LARPing as a sex worker you huge fucking fag. A lot of sex workers chose that line of work.