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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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14062634 No.14062634 [Reply] [Original]

What would you like see your wife make for your post-morning cuddles bed-breakfast?

>> No.14062662
File: 163 KB, 1280x960, 1420677963057[1].jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14062662

>> No.14062679

>>14062634
Whatever her boyfriend is having.

>> No.14062704

>>14062634
>cuddles
men don't cuddle.
we wake up and piss.

>> No.14062709

>>14062679
not funny

>>14062704
what have for breakfast after piss

>> No.14062715

>>14062704
Hopefully you get out of bed first.

>> No.14062719

Lasagna and beer

>> No.14062728

>>14062634
Well, I've been with my wife for 10 years now. We met in high school, and I got her pregnant.
She is and always has been a lazy person and a shit cook. I wouldn't even mind eating shit food if she at least made it on time. But she rarely did.

We'd get into screaming arguments constantly about how lazy and worthless she was. I felt like an asshole for it, but goddamn she was a real piece of work. The only reason I dealt with all this was for the kids, and also because the sex is great.

But one night, I got fed up. Not only did she get drunk, neglect the kids, and made me top Ramen for dinner, but she decided to give me attitude too. She was being real fucking bitchy. So I told my grandparents to keep an eye on the kids and told my wife we were going to go out and have dinner together. I drove maybe 3 blocks to a quiet area (we live in Oregon, it's not hard to find a quiet field) and I got out of the car, went around like I was going to open her door for her and let her out, and I just beat the shit out of her while she was still seatbelted. After a few punches, I asked her if she wanted to go back to her parents. She started screaming and yelling and said yes, so I beat the shit out of her again. Then I asked her what she wanted to do. She finally got smart and said she wanted to go home. So I took her home and dared her to start trouble. I even handed her my cellphone and dialed her mom's number on the drive home. I made her talk to her mom, while daring her to fucking say something.

Before that incident, I had never laid a hand on her. But I had always threatened it. I told her "one of these days, if you don't straighten up, I'm going to lay hands on you."

All my meals have been on time, and she just recently tried to make a meatloaf. It was mediocre, but I was just thrilled that she tried.

Do with this information what you will

>> No.14062731
File: 67 KB, 870x565, egg_in_the_hole.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14062731

>>14062634
Egg in the hole

>> No.14062737

>>14062634
These days most chicks are way too lazy to be able to cook anything or think for themselves, that's why they're not marriage material.

>> No.14062740

>>14062728
Based as fuck anon

>> No.14062742

They're too used to just spreading their legs and expecting the world, they're pathetic. Marry one at your peril.

>> No.14062751

>>14062728
Based fuck women

>> No.14062756

>>14062728
nice pasta bro it's getting stale though

>> No.14062838

>>14062728
Nice LARP