/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.13971538]

>bell pepper
>doesn't ring

[Anonymous No.13971546]

>ghost pepper
>perfectly visible

[Anonymous No.13971561]

>banana pepper
>not banana

[Anonymous No.13971571]

>Florina pepper
>is from Brazil

[Anonymous No.13971573]

>heirloom tomato
>hasn't been passed down

[Anonymous No.13971577]

>Scotch Bonnet pepper
>alcohol free and hatless

[Anonymous No.13971578]

>American
>can't

[Anonymous No.13971584]

>elephant garlic
>It's not that big

[Anonymous No.13971585]

>black pepper

[Anonymous No.13971589]

>black people
>not people

[Anonymous No.13971600]

>Canada Dry
>quite wet

[Anonymous No.13971669]

>>13971589
baste

[Anonymous No.13971683]

>/ck/
>doesn't really cook

[Anonymous No.13971728]

>>13971683

[Anonymous No.13971749]

>>13971538
>Cherokee purple tomato
>not Indian

[Anonymous No.13971809]

>>13971577
kek

[Anonymous No.13972222]

>>13971538
Anyone have the problem with these squeaking too much when eating them?

[Anonymous No.13972228]

>try this
>I'm still gay

[Anonymous No.13972254]

>marshmallow
>found in the grocery store and not a wetland

[Anonymous No.13972301]

>>13972222
you have to kill them before you eat them dummy

[Anonymous No.13972502]

>>13972228
Then stop taking them Ben

[Anonymous No.13972511]

>>13971589
Hello, based department?

[Anonymous No.13972622]

>hard seltzer
>it's a liquid

[Anonymous No.13972657]

>>13971538
I've got a phone here. It has a little ring.

[Anonymous No.13972682]

>mountain dew
>not dew
>not from a mountain

[Anonymous No.13972907]

>sparkling water
>it ain't shiny

[Anonymous No.13972965]

>Dr. Pepper
>Not a doctor
>No peppers
> mfw

[Anonymous No.13973004]

>>13971538
>mushroom
>now i have to buy a new house

[Anonymous No.13973039]

>>13973004
lol

[Anonymous No.13973166]

>ramen
>there are no men of ra
>Just fucking noodles

[Anonymous No.13973185]

>>13971538
>OP
>sucks cocks

[Anonymous No.13973319]

>grilled cheese
>it's not grilled
>it isn't cheese

[Anonymous No.13973938]

>>13972907
nice

[Anonymous No.13973961]

>eggplant
>no egg
>Flour
>Doesn't bloom

[Anonymous No.13973982]

>leek
>water isn't being spilled

[Anonymous No.13973999]

>medium steak
>dead don't speak through it, in fact is dead itself

[Anonymous No.13974008]

>granny smith apple
>apple isnt even that old

[Anonymous No.13974011]

>>13972254
>city slicker never went marshmallow hunting in the swamp

[Anonymous No.13974015]

>maize
>consists of nothing but straight rows

[Anonymous No.13974042]

>>13971538
>lethal hardcore
>no-one dies

[Anonymous No.13974048]

>>13971538
reddit shit thread for faggots

[Anonymous No.13974062]

>thread not for faggots
>this guy still posts in it >>13974048

[Anonymous No.13974070]

>>13974042
>hardcore creampie
Wtf grandma

[Anonymous No.13974142]

>head cheese
>has no cheese in it

[Anonymous No.13974147]

>eggs Benedict
>i live alone
>i'm not Benedict

[Anonymous No.13974187]

[Anonymous No.13974192]

>>13971600
>in a bottle

[Anonymous No.13974198]

>cheeseburger
>doesn't come from cheeseburg

[Anonymous No.13974418]

>shrimp fried rice
>not rice fried by an actual shrimp

[Anonymous No.13974492]

>>13971538
>clams casino
Lost all my money

[Anonymous No.13974517]

>sharp cheddar
>Can't cut anything

[Anonymous No.13974541]

>>13971571
Maybe it's in reference to Florianopolis, which is in Brazil.

[Anonymous No.13974558]

>Allspice
>Is not actually all spices

[Anonymous No.13974584]

>cumin
>No coom, and difficult to coom in container

[Anonymous No.13974593]

>>13974558
>Allspice
>Doesn't meant to be used on all foods

[Anonymous No.13974668]

>>13971538
>ladyfingers
>not a lady's fingers

[Anonymous No.13974937]

>>13971578
>American
>Doesn't really

>Kosher salt
>Isn't jewish

[Anonymous No.13974949]

>>13974517
>Sharp cheddar
>Isn't a semitone higher than normal cheddar

[Anonymous No.13974988]

>>13974048
well, it is now that you're here

[Anonymous No.13975006]

>>13971573
>heirloom tomato
>due to quarantine we have to take it down from the frame and eat it. Can't understand why hipsters pay $8 a pound for these

[Anonymous No.13975024]

>well-done steaks
>they're actually done quite poorly

[Anonymous No.13975082]

>>13973166
>ramen
>they're all wearing condoms

[Anonymous No.13975093]

>>13973999
>order medium steak
>waiter brings a tall

[Anonymous No.13975115]

>chili
>is served warm

[Anonymous No.13975142]

>>13975093
>rare steak
>there's a lot of them

[Anonymous No.13975149]

>whiskey on the rocks
>I'm sitting on a chair

[Anonymous No.13975181]

>>13975149
>Cock-a-leekie
>at least i dont have diarrhea anymore

[Anonymous No.13975199]

>angel's food cake
>sucks compared to devil's food

[Anonymous No.13975214]

>cactus cooler
>Tastes like pineapple.

[Anonymous No.13975248]

>pineapple
>isn't an apple nor is it found in the woods

[Anonymous No.13975303]

>>13974147
>eggs Benedict
They've actually been quite pleasant lately.

[Anonymous No.13975776]

>strawberry
>can't use it to drink a liquid

[Anonymous No.13977222]

>>13972254
This one bothers me because the name marsh mallow really is a pretty accurate description of the plant that marshmallows were once made with. It's a kind of mallow that grows in marshes. No irony here.

[Anonymous No.13977237]

>buffalo wings
>buffalo dont got wings

[Anonymous No.13977241]

>american cheese
>not cheese

[Anonymous No.13977400]

>>13971600
You're a little mixed up buddy. It isn't wet at all, it just makes other things wet.

[Anonymous No.13977404]

>>13975082
kek

[Anonymous No.13977412]

>monk fruit
>not a monk

[Anonymous No.13977414]

>>13971538
>Carrots
>Car is still fresh

[Anonymous No.13977436]

>hot dog
>isn’t unseasonably warm
>isn’t a canine

[Anonymous No.13977910]

>>13973999
>well done
>actually the result of poor cooking

[Anonymous No.13979504]

>honeydew
>doesn't taste like honey.

[Anonymous No.13979570]

>Bulb of garlic
>kitchen is dark

[Anonymous No.13979583]

>cook frozen pizza
>tastes pretty good

[Anonymous No.13979647]

>>13971578
Retard
>>13974937
Based

[Anonymous No.13979669]

>>13972622
> he doesn't freeze his white claw

[Anonymous No.13979810]

>>13971538
green is my pepper

[Anonymous No.13979827]

>ginger ale
>2 liters down the gullet and still no buzz

[Anonymous No.13979952]

>root beer float
>fucker is sitting on the table right where I put it

[Anonymous No.13980006]

>>13971573
i thought that the seeds which turns into tomatoes do tho

[Anonymous No.13980031]

>whore pasta
>your Mom made it

[Anonymous No.13980210]

>jerusalem artichoke
>not from israel and doesn't have trouble breathing

[Anonymous No.13980218]

>angel hair pasta
>can't be harvested at the angel barber shop

[Anonymous No.13980227]

>ginger ail
>not a sick redhead

[Anonymous No.13980233]

>plank steak
>not made of wood

[Anonymous No.13980240]

>blue raspberries
>don't exist

[Anonymous No.13980241]

>buy from fruit stand
>robbed afterwards
>cherry taken
>still wizard

[Anonymous No.13980250]

>bread
>isn't red

[Anonymous No.13980252]

>>13977400
um buddy? The inside of the bottle is COMPLETELY SOAKED

[Anonymous No.13980264]

>red onion
>its purple

[Anonymous No.13980265]

>grape fruit
>is an orange

[Anonymous No.13980285]

>>13979952
>Doesn't root for you
>Isn't beer

[Anonymous No.13980293]

>>13971538
>Fruit punch
>perfectly non-violent

[Anonymous No.13980296]

>pine apple
>not wood; not an apple

[Anonymous No.13980314]

>>13980252
Somehow the soda is completely dry though. It's even on the label.

[Anonymous No.13980323]

>>13980241
>at crush's house
>take cherry from her fruit bowl
>put it in the microwave until it pops
so long, virgins

[Anonymous No.13980339]

>everything bagel
>doesn't have ingredients that don't belong in bread

[Anonymous No.13980352]

>almonds
>no activation instructions

[Anonymous No.13980495]

>French fries
>cooked in grease

[Anonymous No.13980540]

>>13975248
Is it Pine-apple or Pi-napple?

[Anonymous No.13980639]

>>13980540
Wtf is a napple?

[Anonymous No.13980682]

>>13980639
The milk nozzle on ur mammy's fat milkers

[Anonymous No.13980687]

>>13980682
I though that was the part between the vagoo and the milkers?

[Anonymous No.13980716]

>OP
>Is a faggot

[Anonymous No.13980863]

>>13972222
Slimy peps

[Anonymous No.13980865]

>>13980314
>>13977400
Water and other liquids are wet
wet is the state of being covered by liquid
all of the liquid in there, every atom, is surrounded by liquid

[Anonymous No.13980870]

>Fish Sauce
>Not even a nibble

[Anonymous No.13980879]

>>13980540
My encyclopedia of fruit says "pineapple"

[Anonymous No.13980893]

>>13972301
kek

[Anonymous No.13980914]

>anchovy paste
>doesn't bond things together

[Anonymous No.13980919]

>>13977400
Explain dry water

[Anonymous No.13980957]

>>13980265
So much this, why the fuck is called grape fruit?

[Anonymous No.13980982]

>hamburger
>is made with beef

[Anonymous No.13980984]

>banana
>monki

[Anonymous No.13981047]

>>13980639
the new product from Cinco

[Anonymous No.13981071]

>>13980865
It can't be surrounded by itself therefore it's not wet.

[Anonymous No.13981075]

>>13971538
>brown flour
>whiter than most ameicans

[Anonymous No.13981079]

>>13980919
It's just wet sand.

[Anonymous No.13981096]

>shrimp scampi
>shrimp stays on the plate

[Anonymous No.13982705]

>>13980879
No no, how do you pronounce it?

[Anonymous No.13982720]

>>13981071
>It can't be surrounded by itself
wrong

[Food Scientits No.13982751]

>>13981079
Explain dry ice

[Anonymous No.13983278]

>expresso
>takes kind of a long time