/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.13273495]

I just made a martini for the first time and it's basically just watered down gin? what the fuck am i missing here

[Anonymous No.13273505]

>>13273495
Well, how did you make it?

[Anonymous No.13273506]

>>13273505
2 parts gin 1 part lemonade

[Anonymous No.13273508]

>>13273505
i tried 2.5oz gin / .5 oz vermouth
then i tried 2/.5

[Anonymous No.13273512]

>>13273495
Do Americans really do this?

[Anonymous No.13273515]

>>13273512
post your recipe faggot

[Anonymous No.13273516]

>>13273495
As always, alter proportions to taste. Play with sweet vermouth vs dry vermouth.
In the last century it was a big meme to go through elaborate rituals to omit the vermouth while still using it: some rinsed the glass with vermouth, some held a bottle of vermouth up to a light and shone the light over a glass of gin, still others simple tipped a glass of gin in the vague direction of France.

If you like neat gin, good for you.

[Anonymous No.13273539]

>>13273515
Why don't you Google one yourself, and post it?

[Anonymous No.13273556]

>>13273506
I'm pretty sure that's not a martini.

[turbovirgin No.13273559]

>>13273539
its this faggot again

kys

[Anonymous No.13273560]

>>13273506
KEK

[Anonymous No.13273836]

Your testicles

[Anonymous No.13273850]

>>13273506
That's not a Martini

[Anonymous No.13273852]

>>13273495
>vodka martini
>5 parts 60% vodka, 1 part vermouth
Drink of the gods.

[Anonymous No.13273889]

>>13273495
My standard drink at cocktail bars and the like is a vodka martini. I can confirm that, indeed, a good martini is just really cold watered down liquor.

[Anonymous No.13274258]

>>13273516
Is... Is this my new copypasta?

[Anonymous No.13274272]

>>13273495
Dirty martinis are superior

[Anonymous No.13274291]

>>13273508
Way too much vermouth. 5:2 ratio works for a Manhattan but in a martini you want like 25:2.

[Anonymous No.13274503]

>>13274291

if the bartender just says the word "Vermouth" while shaking the gin chiller, that' plenty

and vodka does not make a martini
gin and only gin

[Anonymous No.13274538]

>>13274503
>hay guise, what's a vodka martini?

[Anonymous No.13274554]

>>13273852
If by gods you mean sorority THOTs, then yeah.

[Anonymous No.13274559]

>>13274503
>if the bartender just says the word "Vermouth" while shaking the gin chiller, that' plenty
Yes, I know there are about a hundred of these. If the bartender just points the bottle of gin at Italy...etc.

[Anonymous No.13274566]

>>13274503
I like to call that the Dean Martini. In the fall I'll add a twist of pepperoncini to it instead of olive to warm up the guts a bit more.

[Anonymous No.13274567]

>>13274538
A faggot's and pleb's """drink""".
The only acceptable Martini is with gin.

[Anonymous No.13274576]

In ounces, how much gin vs how much vermouth should I try?
Keep it in oz., not this fagspeak of ratios and parts please.

[Anonymous No.13274585]

>>13274567

[Anonymous No.13274591]

>>13274559
I took an eye-dropper into a bar where I have an occasional martini and they use 3 drops of Vermouth, which is pushing it

[Anonymous No.13274599]

>>13274576
5:1 is a good ratio, which is to say 5 parts gin and 1 part vermouth

[Anonymous No.13274612]

>>13274585
It being popular doesn't make it a real drink, stupid

[Anonymous No.13274615]

>>13274591
ugh, old-school slim looks terrible these days. it's like it was achieved with 0 exercise

[Anonymous No.13274633]

For me it's the manhattan.

[Anonymous No.13274638]

>>13274567
I bondburgered your sister, tastelet.

[Anonymous No.13274658]

>>13274612
So they make a drink but it's not "real" because some douche canoe on the chinz says so? Okay, bub, crawl out of your own ass.

[Anonymous No.13274664]

>>13274503
>>13274567
>>13274612
ahh, gatekeeping, the surest sign of an adult child.

[Anonymous No.13274693]

>>13274567
Oh, wow. Big man here, big man. I bet you're a real star at the bar. You must make a point of audibly scoffing whenever you hear someone order something that isn't a "real drink", and then educating them on what they should actually be ordering.

[Anonymous No.13274733]

>>13274693
>>13274664
>>13274658
>>13274638
>>13274585
Seethe more, uncultured faggot redditors

[Anonymous No.13274790]

>>13274633
My man

[Anonymous No.13274798]

To be honest, the best martini I've had is the Vesper (from the Vesper bar in the Cosmo) and it has both gin and vodka. The bartender handed it to me saying "This is why James bond is an alcoholic" and sure enough two went down so quick and smooth I could see having 9 of them if I didn't drag myself away.
>>13274633
This is generally me as well, plus people don't argue about them as much.

[Anonymous No.13274836]

>>13273495
drinking martinis is a phase. you'll grow out of it.

[Anonymous No.13274850]

>>13274836
Disagree. Everyone can appreciate a simple, clean cocktail.
A privileged few ascend beyond humanity and come to enjoy the savory refreshment of a dirty martini.

[Anonymous No.13274857]

>>13273506
Don't listen to the plebs, that's exactly what James orders in Casino Royale. He called it a Vesper.

[Anonymous No.13274894]

>craig
>bond

[Anonymous No.13274931]

>not dirty
lol

[Anonymous No.13275004]

>>13274733
thanks for the ((you's)) kind stranger! upvoted whilst drinking a vodka martini.

[Anonymous No.13275009]

>>13273516
>>13274503
>>13274559
>>13274591
>>13274615
>>13274798
Cringe. Really hope this is just one person.

[Anonymous No.13275052]

Bartender here. The way people drink martinis now is just a fucking chilled gin shot.

[Anonymous No.13275057]

>>13275052
>now

You're not a very good bartender.

[Anonymous No.13275089]

>>13275057
Woah buddy I can make a martini, people seem to mostly order dry vodka martinis or dirty martinis with no vermouth. So either it's a chilled spirit in a glass or a chilled spirit with olive juice in a glass. I guess if you are drinking to get drunk this is pretty efficient.

[Anonymous No.13275095]

>>13275009
why would someone reply to their own posts? lmao

[Anonymous No.13275122]

Is it normal to add butter when you cook it?

[Anonymous No.13275153]

>>13275122
lol fuck, wrong thread. I can't wait for the inevitable
>do americans really put butter in their martinis?

[Anonymous No.13275165]

>>13275153
lmao, I was actually going to reply to your original and be like "did you mean hot buttered rum?" good save.

[Anonymous No.13275466]

>>13273505
Shaken, not stirred

[Anonymous No.13275496]

>>13273495
It shouldn't be watered down; you're only supposed to add a tiny dash of vermouth.

Regardless, a martini is essentially a polite way to, well, drink a whole glass of gin.

[Anonymous No.13275522]

>>13275496
That's a meme from WWII. The original martini was 2:1 gin to sweet vermouth.

[Anonymous No.13275533]

>>13274633
I made this, thought it just tasted like booze on booze

I liked an old fashioned better, wanna make a sazerac soon

[Anonymous No.13275573]

>>13274733
lol

[Anonymous No.13277006]

>>13275573
He's not wrong though.

[Anonymous No.13277018]

>>13274733

the meta post
always a favorite

[Anonymous No.13277025]

>>13274857
Then it's a Vesper, but not a Martini.

[Anonymous No.13277030]

>>13273506
top jej

[Anonymous No.13277062]

Okay fuck the rest of the gay shit in this thread. What are the best and worse cocktails you've made?

Best for me is what I call a Bloody Dutchman. Its a bloody mary with Brandy in place of Vodka, has a nice funk to it.

Worse was when I had gotten the bright idea to mix light, toasted coconut rum with milk. it was foul and made me want to vomit. Only finished it cause I had a box of milk duds to wash out the flavor as I drank it

[Anonymous No.13277121]

>>13273495
Reminder: James Bond's drink of choice is not a martini. It's actually a Vesper. The movie guys decided that was too obscure so they changed it for the moves to a martini.

[Anonymous No.13277135]

>>13277121
Also remember in the first book James was only chosen for the mission cause he was the best gambler of the organization and wanted him to make a russian operative lose literally all of his cash and be bankruptted into turn coating to escape his furious bosses, not anywhere close to their best spy.

Wish the movie bonds were like that, just a drunk gambler fucking over super villains and shit by conning them out of their fortunes at the casino table

[Anonymous No.13277141]

>>13277135
I mean the Daniel Craig bond is definitely not the best operative to be fair. He's very flawed.

[Anonymous No.13277168]

>>13277062
Around this time of year I do a caramel apple white Russian type drink. 50ml Stoli, 100ml vanilla cinnamon Bailey's, just a splash of caramel apple liqueur. It's fucking D to the A to the N to the K. Green Berets are cool too because they are so easy.

[Anonymous No.13277175]

>>13277062
Best is by far the classic White Russian. Worst is.... Irish car bomb.

[Anonymous No.13277281]

>>13277141
>He's very flawed.
But he gets the job done, god dammit.

[Anonymous No.13277295]

>>13274857
A vesper martini does NOT have lemonade. It's just a more alcoholic martini with some vodka in addition to the gin and vermouth.

>>13273495
OP, if you aren't putting orange bitters in your martini, don't even bother making one.

[Anonymous No.13278331]

>>13273495
>Complains about his Martini tasting like gin
>Posts a pic of a man enjoying a vodka martini.

[Anonymous No.13279836]

Martini is a great drink.

[Anonymous No.13279855]

>>13279836
Martini Rosso (sweet) is delicious

[Anonymous No.13280909]

W-What does vermouth taste like?

Also what are some basic things I can pick up at the supermarket to make cocktails? I know limes are one. What else? Apple juice?

[Anonymous No.13280923]

>>13280909
Vermouth is just a dry white wine with some herbs in it. Honestly it doesn't taste too different from dry white wines.

If you're going to the supermarket, you probably can't get liquor if you're in the US, but you can get angostura bitters, lime and lemon juice, grenadine, milk, cream, etc. My best advice is to get the stuff you'll use for other things also and then look up a couple popular cocktails to make and get those ingredients. Most cocktails require 2-3 different bottles of alcohol though so it can get expensive experimenting with different things.

[Anonymous No.13280937]

>>13280923
Not US so I can get liquor here, but I've never seen bitters before. Would I be very limited trying to make cocktails without them/other fancy ingredients like vermouth?
I already have whiskey at home, what additional liquors would give me the greatest variety in your opinion? I was thinking darker rum + gin.

[Anonymous No.13280945]

>vodka martini
>shaken, not stirred
>all women in the bar gush in their panties
this is what guys who order martinis imagine

[Anonymous No.13280967]

>>13280937
Gin is a must buy, I recommend Beefeater as a mid shelf that's pretty much the least polarizing gin. Whiskey is a popular base spirit, but also there are many cocktails that call for specifically bourbon or canadian whiskey so maybe get one of those. As for rum cocktails, many call for silver rum instead of dark rum, so look up some recipes and choose one of them for now. Brandy cocktails are also nice, and there are a few cheap brandies that are decent tasting (St. Remy in particular). Liqueurs and cordials are also pretty necessary for cocktails, particularly triple sec, St. Germaine, amaretto, curacao, etc. It all depends on your budget and how well stocked your grocery store is.

Overall, it's tough to build a decent bar without buying 20+ bottles and spending a lot of cash, so you might be better off going to bars and sampling cocktails to see what you want to make.

[Anonymous No.13280975]

>>13280937
>>13280967
Also I forgot to mention, angostura bitters is pretty important too, many cocktails call for it. Pic related. Every grocery store I've been to has it but I'm not sure where you live and it might be different there.

[Anonymous No.13281005]

>>13280967
>>13280975
Thanks, really appreciated. I guess I can order the bitters off amazon worst case.
Can you tell me what the difference between these is? Why is the 0.1l variant more expensive than the 0.2l? They seem to be the same brand and the ingredient list is the exact same.

https://www.amazon.de/Angostura-Bitters-907200-Angostura-Aromatic-Bitter-1-x-0-2/dp/B0043AA10W/

https://www.amazon.de/Angostura-Bitters-WWO710103-Aromatic-Bitter/dp/B00576SHBQ/

[Anonymous No.13281014]

>>13281005
Yeah they are the exact same, the .2 L version is the one to get. I'm not sure why the .1 L is more expensive, maybe it's a discontinued version with lower stock or something. I've never seen one that small.

[Anonymous No.13281015]

>>13281005
Looks like the 200ml is being sold by an external vendor.

[Anonymous No.13281027]

>>13281014
Gotcha.
>>13281015
Nah it says that Amazon directly ships it.

[Anonymous No.13282440]

>>13277121
Jesus. Let's clear this up. The Vesper martini is named after the girl Bond fucks in Casino Royale.
It's 3 ounces Gordon's gin, 1 ounce vodka and a half ounce Lillet's dry vermouth, shaken, and served with a lemon peel. It's really good and ridiculously strong for a martini.

[Anonymous No.13282464]

>>13282440

I would drink the fuck out these until I ended up on the floor (down on the floor?)

[Anonymous No.13282471]

Very dirty. With lots of olives.

Shake/stirr I could not give a fuck.

[Anonymous No.13282503]

Best martini recipe coming through:

3 oz gin
.5 oz vermouth

Put the vermouth in a shaker with plenty of ice.
Shake vigorously for 15-30 seconds, then strain. The only vermouth that goes into the drink is what coats the ice.
Add gin to the same shaker, and stir to combine.
Pour and enjoy.

[Anonymous No.13282508]

>>13274894
BASED
A
S
E
D

[Anonymous No.13283248]

>>13282503

>dumping alcohol down the drain as part of a recipe

[Anonymous No.13283253]

>>13273495
multigenerational marketing

[Anonymous No.13283256]

>>13273495
You do realize that all cocktails are watered down spirits designed to maximize profit per bottle right?

[Anonymous No.13283455]

>>13283256
What kind of dystopian shithole do you live in? They charge by the alcohol: a shot of rum is the same price as a rum and coke.

[Anonymous No.13283564]

>>13282503
People hate, but I'm with you. I think vermouth ruins everything it touches so I try to use as little as possible.

[Anonymous No.13283590]

>>13277175
Dad?

[Anonymous No.13283606]

>>13277175
>Worst is.... Irish car bomb.
I have only ever had those when I was already too drunk to taste. I got this cherry liqueur that ruined everything I put it in but that was just me experimenting. I say the worst is any cocktail that includes that shitty cherry liqueur.

[Anonymous No.13283622]

>>13283455
>is the same price as a rum and coke
>morons actually believe this

top kek

[Anonymous No.13283636]

>>13277175

you are WRONG. adding liquor to beer results in many wonderful fucking drinks.

[Anonymous No.13283641]

>>13283622
Buying a rum and coke in the first place is all you need to know about his intellect.

[Anonymous No.13283750]

>>13283622
at dive bars this is usually true, at least the ones i frequent. they'll even give you soda for free if you just order it without alcohol

[Anonymous No.13283761]

>>13274272
based
that saltiness is addictive

[Anonymous No.13283769]

>>13283750
yes because they have to find some way to attract customers into their shithole,

[Anonymous No.13283867]

>>13283256
You realize we're talking about a cocktail that is nothing but booze, right?

[Anonymous No.13283940]

>>13274664
you can't provide any reason why gatekeeping is bad.

[Anonymous No.13284031]

>>13283940
In this case your gatekeeping is nothing more than a personal preference for heavily modifying a drink, to the point it no longer actually resembles a cocktail in any form other than there being alcohol in a glass.

[Anonymous No.13284113]

>>13283867
Yes, good goy pay the man to mix and put an olive in it lots of shekels

[Anonymous No.13284201]

>>13284113

Cool it with the anti-Semitic remarks please

[Anonymous No.13284214]

>>13283256
finally I understand

[Anonymous No.13284219]

>>13283256

And this is why a dry martini is the best alco to price drink. It's hard to gyp someone with less alcohol when you can see the exact amount in your glass and thick glasses are noticeable.

[Anonymous No.13284230]

>>13284201

[Anonymous No.13284247]

>>13273495
>watered down gin
So you're missing vermouth and orange bitters.

[Anonymous No.13284249]

>>13274615
There were diet pills available over the counter then that you can’t even get on scrip now.

[Anonymous No.13284281]

>>13284247
>(orange) bitters
optional to the point of "nobody does that"

It does help out the gin though, especially if you bought one you're not really big on (which is a terrible idea for a martini, seeing as your ratio's probably going to be minimum 5 gin: 2 vermouth).

I obviously can't/won't get my hands on a bottle of Kina Lillet, but my favourite abuse of alcohol lately is a Vesper (martini) made with Lillet dry and a single fleck of cinchona bark:
>Three shots of Gordon's,
>one of Tito's,
>half-ish of Lillet Dry,
>one thin slice of lemon (peel removed for garnish),
>that cinchona piece,
>and 2/3 of a highball of ice,
>shaken ten times, given a swirl, and poured ideally into a champagne flute (I know, it's supposed to be a goblet, but I find the tighter nose keeps the lillet and quinine near the tip of the tongue where it belongs).

[Anonymous No.13284291]

>>13284281
>optional to the point of "nobody does that"
It's not optional. Without orange bitters it's not a Martini. Just like you can't make a Manhattan without Angostura bitters.

[Anonymous No.13284305]

>>13284291
For every martini recipe you can find me involving bitters of any kind, I'll show you ten without. As martinis became drier, the bitters dwindled and dropped. A "classic" martini (heavy on the vermouth, with a dash of bitters to round it out) would be almost unrecognizable to someone used to the modern "Wave the glass toward Europe and hand me my cold gin" Martini.

[Anonymous No.13284308]

>>13284291
Orange bitters isn't in a martini you fucking faggot. I would throw that shit in the eyes of my bartender if he ever gave me a "martini" with fucking orange bitters. I'd also kill the people next to me.

[Anonymous No.13284315]

>>13284308
With everything happening in the gin, you shouldn't notice the bitters, especially a relatively sweeter seville orange or key lime based bitters, and especially if you drink your martini with a garnish of any kind - olives, pickled onion (Gibson, I know), and lemon would all mask the bitters - You'd most likely only notice that the drinks are going down faster than usual.

[Anonymous No.13284317]

>>13274566
>In the fall I'll add a twist of pepperoncini to it instead of olive to warm up the guts a bit more.

Based. A great idea. I would like to seek more of your teachings.

[Anonymous No.13284321]

>>13284317
If you're going to use habanero, do not serve it as a garnish. Use very little and make sure it stays in the shaker. Garnish with lime.

[Anonymous No.13284343]

>>13284321
More

[Anonymous No.13284350]

>>13284343
I'm not even that guy, I've just dicked around with slightly spicy cocktails and made some horrible mistakes.

But, if you wish for more wisdom - try the gin you're making your martini with at room temperature with a splash of water, and see what flavours come to mind. Those are your garnishes. For instance, Hendricks works well with cucumber, sweet pepper, bay leaf and rosemary.

[Anonymous No.13284569]

What cocktails do you guys make regularly at home (not at bars)?

[Anonymous No.13284610]

>>13274733
>uncultured

[Anonymous No.13284621]

People water down gin?

[Anonymous No.13286163]

>>13284569
Old Fashioneds, Caipirissimas, Negronis, Martinis, Manhattans, White Russians, and I can usually whip something up if a guest asks for it.

[Anonymous No.13286262]

>>13284569
Negronis and espresso martinis. Bitches love espresso martinis.

Also fireball/fresh apple juice/a squeeze of lemon juice, but I have no idea what it's called.

[Anonymous No.13286276]

>>13286262
sounds like a revised applejack sour

[Anonymous No.13286372]

>>13282503
Some coat the glass with vermout and throw the excess away.
But I like your way also, really nice.

[Anonymous No.13286492]

>>13286372
I've never understood why people don't just add the amount of vermouth they want instead of wasting it.