[ 3 / biz / cgl / ck / diy / fa / ic / jp / lit / sci / vr / vt ] [ index / top / reports ] [ become a patron ] [ status ]
2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/ck/ - Food & Cooking

View post   
File: 122 KB, 1300x865, 55560617-service-de-restauration-restaurant-serveuse-fille-avec-plateau-de-nourriture-à-l-événement-tir-authen.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13151086 No.13151086 [Reply] [Original]

>Welcome to Paris monsieur, we serve ze best cuisine in ze universe
>May I take your ordeure ?

>> No.13151095

Una hombre comsales por favor?

>> No.13151096

one snail please

>> No.13151098
File: 57 KB, 667x1024, 1537750029572.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13151098

I'll have the chicken tenderloins. Lightly fried, with a honey sweetened Dijon mustard sauce.

>> No.13151103

>>13151098
Fuuuuck i have those socks why you have to do this

>> No.13151107
File: 89 KB, 681x1023, depositphotos_8732299-stock-photo-waitress-girl-of-commercial-restaurant.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13151107

>>13151095
>je ne parle pas le macaque ibérique monsieur, ceci est un établissement de bon goût.

>> No.13151110

>>13151086
Yeah can I get
Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Burger
With no meat
No cheese
And no vegetable

>> No.13151113

>>13151086
Fish tacos extra fishy and a bottle of champers

>> No.13151116

>>13151086
un burger sans fromage... bitte

>> No.13151117

>>13151098
I’ll have his order but with barbecue instead of honey mustard

>> No.13151118
File: 58 KB, 550x412, chez-l-ami-louis.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13151118

>>13151096
>Voilà monsieur, that'll be 24 euros

>> No.13151148

Bring me some compte and a bottle conditioned jura beer
> svp

>> No.13151161

>>13151118
He said one snail. Uno comprehendo?

>> No.13151173

>>13151086
your sweety asshole haha
just a water to drink thanks

>> No.13151205
File: 70 KB, 400x398, Peste_Noire_L_Ordure_l_tat_Pur.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13151205

You can take my ordure, fucking waiter SCUM haha
Fuck I hate my life.

>> No.13151261
File: 28 KB, 660x440, Chloë des Lysses-Nathalie Boët.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13151261

>>13151086

A cheese burger and your most Frenchiest fries, por fa vor.

>> No.13151262

>takes your order
>never comes back
>charges you for tap water which has no ice

>> No.13151263

Yes I’ll have the steak burrito, add queso and avocado, side of rice and beans and a large horchata.

>> No.13151356

>>13151107
dame mis tendiss zoooorraaaaaaa RRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>> No.13151527

>>13151086
Yeah I'l take some donner n kebab. thanks mohammad.

>> No.13151532
File: 41 KB, 556x879, retard socks.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13151532

>>13151103
>I have autistic puzzle piece socks

>> No.13151535

>>13151262
Water is free by law in French restaurants.

>> No.13151555

>>13151532
Fuuuuuuuuuuck i though they were funny i wear those at work :(((

>> No.13151564
File: 145 KB, 266x300, serveimage.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13151564

I'll have the roast wild boar, please. I've always been curious to try it

>> No.13152080

>>13151116
Haha il a dit bite

>> No.13152133

>>13151086
I'll have what you're havin, about a day after you've already had it.

>> No.13152344

>>13151086
I’ll have a refugee. No aids please

>> No.13152406

I'll have your pussi for tonight please my dear
I might get something else to wash it down later, but for now your pussi will suffice

>> No.13152544

>>13151086
What about your pie?

>> No.13152557
File: 51 KB, 1000x1000, 1546878912918.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13152557

can you just order in english in restaurants across europe? I want to travel but don't want to spill my spaghetti

>> No.13152590
File: 287 KB, 1082x695, c3f.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13152590

>>13151098
Based

>>13151117
Based and redpilled. A true tendie connoisseur

>> No.13152697

>>13151555
They are funny, anon

>> No.13152731
File: 19 KB, 362x348, DEGI6tTUQAAg6sm.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13152731

>>13151086
Je prendrai les escargots en persillade en entrée suivis de la poularde farcie avec ses légumes bouillon et pommes aligot.
Puis le metton de lait de vache au vin jaune, votre sélection de fromages affinés, et enfin le millefeuille à la gousse de vanille et son sorbet au cidre pétillant.
Tout cela accompagné d'un magnum de Pessac Léognan 2004 bien sûr.

>> No.13152806

>>13152731
>frog poster posts frog gobbledygook
You can't make this shit up!

>> No.13152909

>>13152731
>metton aprés le plat principal

>> No.13152922

>>13151086
An croc monsier sil voo play et an stella artooar

>> No.13153112
File: 68 KB, 537x600, 1435286803776.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13153112

>>13151086
Lemme get summa dat toe-cheese, ma-dame-muhweezel

>> No.13154255

Ah yes, I will 'ave ze uuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhh........

>> No.13154267

>>13151086
I’ll have two number 9s, a number 9 large, a number 6 with extra dip, a number 7, two number 45s, one with cheese, and a large soda.

>> No.13154277

>>13151086
Yeah, um... Gimme a...
uh....
a #7 with extra pickles, with a large fries and a large coke.
To go please. mercy boocoop.

>> No.13154355

>>13152557
no

>> No.13154381

>>13151086
can i... uh... how about... can i get... *points at item on menu * can i get this one?

>> No.13154388

>>13154381
Oui, one booster seat for monsieur.

>> No.13154444

>>13151086
>implying anyone there speaks English

>> No.13154482

my girlfriend is off the boat french and she laughs at me when i try to speak french. idk how this relates to /ck/ but she loves sushi and i eat fish too slurp

>> No.13154483

>>13154482
Your girlfriend is a rude bitch.

>> No.13154535

>>13154482
I bet her French sounds like pokemane's.

>> No.13154538
File: 46 KB, 271x243, french.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13154538

>>13151086
One order of your hairy French pusy to go sil vous plait

>> No.13155829

Mac n cheese please

>> No.13155840
File: 2 KB, 125x100, 1570464968802s.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13155840

le tendies

>> No.13155873

>>13152731
>Pessac Léognan 2004
Absolument basé.

>> No.13156478

>>13152731
Ça m'a donné faim.

>> No.13156658

>>13152557
Yes. I have never once bothered to learn y*ropoor language when traveling

>> No.13156675

>>13151086
One steak, well done, with ketchup, no sides and a diet coke please.

>> No.13156679

Get me the stinkiest cheese you have, dried bread and wine. Oh and several heads of garlic, raw

>> No.13156687
File: 104 KB, 1280x720, babish.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13156687

>>13151086
Cailles en Sarcophage, s'il vous plait.

>> No.13156730

boeuf bourguignon svp

>> No.13157473

For me, it's cassoulet, the best French dish.

>> No.13157865

>>13151086
>>13151107
>>13151261

>tfw no baugette gf that wants to have sex all the time

>> No.13157872

>>13151086
Une blowjob please.

>> No.13159064

>>13151086
may I take your hors d'oeuvres?

>> No.13159071

>>13152557
the french will despise you for it

>> No.13159082

>>13152557
in some places, yes, if they have a high presence of English-speaking tourists.

Otherwise, all you really need is when they come over, give an uhhhh and poorly attempt the words in whatever the language is. And at least a mumbled thank you in the local language too.

From my experiences traveling, they appreciate the effort, no matter how slight. This of course goes out the window if you're somewhere with weird symbols for words but then how do you know what you're ordering unless there are pictures?

>> No.13159087

>>13154482
I had a housemate who briefly had a French girlfriend. She found that we counted on our hands starting with the index finger and not sequentially from thumb just the weirdest shit.

She couldn't cook and was messy as shit, and also awful in bed if my buddy was to be believed. Not surprised she didn't last long.

>> No.13159094
File: 212 KB, 1400x700, whore devours.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13159094

>>13151086
NO! These are MY hour-devours...

>> No.13159104

>>13159071
The French will despise you regardless. Who cares what 3rd-worlders think? On that note, why would you ever willingly go to France?

>> No.13159143

>>13151086
Cette salope n'a jamais été à Rygel-Sept... Could I please get an order of gougères to start, followed by whatever soup you recommend, with a bottle of whatever wine you prefer, a snifter of whatever brandy you hate most, and a kiss on the cheek? Thanks love.

>> No.13159569

>>13152922
basé haha

>> No.13159608

>>13159082
This. When we were in Japan, a lot of the menus had pictures for some reason, even in mom and pop places, or a symbol showing most popular. Point works super well anywhere in the world.

>> No.13159667

>>13151086
Cotriade please.

>> No.13159691

>>13151086
Peana butter jelly.

>> No.13159709

>>13157865
>tfw had one but broke her heart
She was fun and I loved her but then she became a social justice warrior. It was hard to go out with her or talk to her because it seemed like it took over her personality.

>> No.13159739

>>13152557
Depends where you are.

In the big cities, English is almost universally spoken, and has taken on a role as a sort of bridge language among the various peoples of Europe. Just earlier this year, I was in Milan, and heard people on the street speaking English to one another, with a mix of French, British, Italian, and German accents. If you're in a city, particularly if you're going to a fairly upscale restaurant, you'll be able to order in English without any difficulty, and may even be offered an English-language menu.

But if you end up in smaller towns that don't get many international visitors, menus will be in the local language, and you will probably have a hard time being understood if you don't learn some basic phrases.

>> No.13159763
File: 71 KB, 487x498, smug french pepe.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13159763

>tfw burger and speak broken French at the Québecois and Brunswickian McDonalds
>Bonjour! ja voodrey coefee a mcgridle siel voul play.
>unintelligible order confirmation
>mais oui!
>pull up to first window
>they're still speaking French
>give the money and primarily reply with très bien, très bien, ois!
>next window
>hand me the food, I smile.
>Au revoir!
Fool them every time. I see why the actual French look down on them. I don't think I could have gotten away with it in France.

>> No.13159769

>>13159104
As a frog, let me tell you that paris is not france.
thank you

>> No.13159776

>>13159763
>bonjour / s'il vous plait / au revoir
you wouldn't fool anyone in france, there's no way a french is this well behaved

>> No.13159785

>>13159763
>looking down on people for being convivial and accepting over being spiteful cunts

>> No.13159788
File: 183 KB, 1024x652, paree.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13159788

>>13151086
ja, wie will have wun paris bitte

>> No.13159857

>>13159785
I meant looking down on them linguistically. I've seen the threads here before and they say Quebec French sounds terrible.

>> No.13159956

>>13159763
I hate to break it to you but they obviously know you're English and don't care enough to switch

>> No.13160255

>>13159763
>the american trying to learn french is cute :)

>> No.13160264

>>13152909
C'est comme ça qu'ils le servent au Plaza Athénée, mon cher

>> No.13160274

I'll have the pusy please, medium rare

>> No.13160286

>>13160255
God I wish that were me

>> No.13160293
File: 6 KB, 200x200, me.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13160293

>>13160286
It is me.

>> No.13160295

>>13151086
I want your french pussy, madame ;)

>> No.13160314
File: 28 KB, 400x400, B_0ACsww_400x400.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13160314

>>13160293
You're cute.

>> No.13160524
File: 105 KB, 1200x700, MF.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13160524

>>13160295
Voici votre plat de moules marinières persillées accompagné de frites dorées à l'huile d'arachide , Monsieur Burger.
Bon appétit.

>> No.13160621

>>13160524
Arachnid oil? Ew!

>> No.13160693

>>13151086
One Royale with cheese, and make it snappy!

>> No.13160718

sorry i dont speak spanish amigo

>> No.13160720

>>13151086

Vôtre chatte, hand it over.

>> No.13160724

>>13151555
THAT is funny

>> No.13160727 [DELETED] 
File: 13 KB, 300x168, download.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13160727

>>13151086
I'll have your TWAT which I will then use to FAWK

>> No.13161519

>>13160693
D'accord mosuier

>> No.13162612

>>13160524
Kek

>> No.13162623

>>13151535
>They had to make it a law so frogs would stop charging for warm water.

>> No.13162659

>>13161519
>mosuier
oof

>> No.13162738

>>13162659
>oof
>>>/r/eddit

>> No.13162740

>>13162738
I was saying it ironically so it's fine.

>> No.13162752

>>13162740
Ironic shitposting is still shitposting

>> No.13162764

>>13162752
indeed

>> No.13162768

>>13151086
Oh I'll start off with some chili then, and a steak burrito however the chef most recommends. You did say best cuisine right? So you do serve tex mex right?

>> No.13162795

>>13151205
Based

>> No.13162848

>>13151205
Haha ordure.

>> No.13162889

>>13160524
Ce n'est pas tout à fait ce que j'ai commandé alors je suis déçu, mais merci quand même.

>> No.13162979

>>13151086
somthings wrong with her face

>> No.13163000

>>13162979
Those beady eyes betray her Anglo rape-baby heritage.
No amount of make up can hide it.

>> No.13163232

BIG CHUNK OF MEET

>> No.13163869

>>13151098
Incredible

>> No.13163883

voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir?

>> No.13163906

>>13151098
Absolutely based

>> No.13164223

>>13151107
Vete a tomar por culo maldita zorra. Te voy a romper el ano si sigues asi. Ahora dame tu mejor jamón ibérico.

>> No.13164230
File: 173 KB, 960x912, CCC4B898-E285-4FFB-96D7-23BC00CB9DF1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
13164230

Moa, deu in, ème lé çalop frensèz

>> No.13164277

>>13151086
No No No No No!!!!!!!!!!!!!