/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.11905835]

How would you cook human meat?

[Anonymous No.11905837]

like all my lovers I would take it raw

[Anonymous No.11905839]

>>11905835
Since I've never had human meat I'd start very basic to get a feel for it. Just fry a couple of pieces and season with some salt and pepper.

[Anonymous No.11905856]

>>11905835
With a hot plate

[Anonymous No.11905862]

>>11905835
too old

[Anonymous No.11905883]

>>11905835
Depends on the age of the person it came from and the cut.
It can be quite tough if not from a child so I'd slow cook or even stew it.
You can use similar seasonings and side dishes as you would with pork. Just look for something to complement it's natural sweetness.

[Anonymous No.11905893]

would you eat the dick and balls?

[Anonymous No.11905899]

>>11905893
did it came from a virgin or chad?

[Anonymous No.11905902]

>>11905899
why does it matter?

[Anonymous No.11905908]

>>11905902
you are what you eat

[Anonymous No.11905909]

>>11905908
so you would eat a Chad dick to become a Chad?

[Anonymous No.11905911]

>>11905909

yes, anon. eat up.
>unzips dick

[Anonymous No.11905921]

>>11905893
Penis is too tough to eat, dogs like it though.
Testicles can be deep fried.

[Anonymous No.11905942]

>>11905835
Armin knows

https://realunexplainedmysteries.com/the-armin-meiwes-cannibalism-case

[Anonymous No.11905947]

>>11905835
Call me weird, but I've thought about this for a bit.
Firstly, the only human I'd eat outside of a life or death scenario is either a cute girl or a clone of myself. If I'm gonna be a cannibal, I want to either be wholly comfortable or aroused by the food.
As for prepping the corpse, I'll cut the head off. The brain is unedible, and the hair is a pain to deal with. I might cut out the tongue and eyeballs, out of curiosity of their taste.
I'll cut up the rest of the body to freeze since I can't finish an entire corpse in a day.
For my first day, I'll cut some fatty meat to fry, and some muscle to make a stew.
The frying is for an initial taste test, and the stew is because muscle is tough.
The rest of the meat will likely be used the same way. I'll braise the intestines and stomach, use half the liver for a pate, and the other half with minced meat for a meat sauce over pasta.
Not sure what the other organs could be used for, I'd have to experiment. I wonder if you could eat a womb and ovaries. Might need to google that.

[Anonymous No.11905961]

deep fry whole body and eat with ketchup and mayo.

[Anonymous No.11905976]

>>11905961
this

[Anonymous No.11905980]

>>11905835
>not gutted
have fun with your poop filled human sausage

[Anonymous No.11906084]

>>11905835
>extra lean
Gross

[Anonymous No.11906098]

>>11905835
Would there be that much meat on a grass fed human?

[Anonymous No.11906107]

>>11905856
just slap it on the radiator anon. barely cook it

[Anonymous No.11906116]

>>11905893
>he doesn't like rocky mountain oysters

[Anonymous No.11906245]

>>11905835
the majority of meat in a human would have to be slow cooked because of all the work they do. You wouldn't want lower legs or arms for example.
I'd take the bicep, give the neck muscles and the ass muscles a go first.

[Anonymous No.11906704]

>>11905835
>£5.99
That seems rather cheap.

[Anonymous No.11906716]

>>11906704
a nigger

[Anonymous No.11906720]

>>11906716
I mean, it's a nigger.

[Anonymous No.11906732]

>>11906245
What about neetmeat though?

[Anonymous No.11907037]

3 parts soy sauce
1 part five spice
1 part salt/sugar
1 part black/white pepper
1 part garlic
1 part shaoxing wine

marinate 4 hours plus

ass potato starch coating...


fry in ...some sort of animal fat.

low temp, then high temp

toss with garlic/red peppers
garnish with green onions

[Anonymous No.11907473]

Since human meat is tough this really makes me think about how Africans always make human stew when they butcher niggas. I've been thinking if human tounge might be one of the more tender cuts.

[Anonymous No.11907484]

>>11906084
Well, a "grass fed" human would get pretty fucking skinny.

[Anonymous No.11907555]

>>11905835
>first world human meat
Fucking no.
Even 3rd world isolated tribes of cannibals say we taste like shit
If I'm eating a human its gotta a youngen who has not been swamped in all the shit we eat in our food.

[Anonymous No.11907585]

>>11905835
>human meat with hair still on

???

[Anonymous No.11907707]

>>11905835
Would be funnier if it said "free range human"

[Anonymous No.11907711]

it's supposed to be like pork

[Anonymous No.11907715]

>>11905835
Like lean pork.

[Anonymous No.11907717]

>another vegan thread

[Anonymous No.11907718]

>>11905893
Anybody got that 19th century serial killer quote where the guy talked about eating a boy's "peewee" and "little monkeys"?

[Anonymous No.11907722]

>>11907718
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yrbZxtuUdsQ

[Herb No.11907728]

>>11907717
based pyjama poster

[Anonymous No.11907796]

>>11907585
That's to make it more (((relatable)))

[Anonymous No.11907842]

>>11907718
That's Albert Fish you're talking about.

He was a really crazy guy. He used to shove needles into his perineum.

[Anonymous No.11907876]

>>11905835
>slaughtered in the UK
I dont eat muslim

[Anonymous No.11907907]

>>11907876
>muslim
mu-slim sounds like a muesli breakfast cereal.

[Anonymous No.11907930]

>>11905835
>grass fed
this kills the human

[Anonymous No.11909092]

>>11905835
same as any pork roast

[Anonymous No.11909096]

[Anonymous No.11909200]

>>11907718
Fish claimed the following in a letter to his attorney:
I never ate any roast turkey that tasted half as good as his sweet fat little behind did. I ate every bit of the meat in about four days. His little monkey was as sweet as a nut, but his pee-wees I could not chew. Threw them in the toilet.

[Anonymous No.11909488]

[Anonymous No.11909590]

>>11905835
Just take recipes away from Hannibal desu, it's what I did with Soma.

[Anonymous No.11911049]

>>11905835
>Extra lean, grass fed
Lies. There's no way that's a north korean.

[Anonymous No.11911062]

>>11909488
that's stupid. gatorade is just sugar water. is everybody but me retarded?

[Anonymous No.11911068]

>>11911062
no, other way around

[Anonymous No.11912444]

>>11907796
Or the faggot vegan didn't want to dedicate himself enough to ruin his looks by shaving everything off his head