/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.11659996]

Alright nerds, it's the holidays so it's time to talk about what really matters, which is what you and your dumb white trash families put in chex mix. There's a right and a wrong way to do this, and like life in general, I see a lot of you are doing it the wrong way. Let me break it down so simple even your senile granny can figure it out:

God tier
>goldfish crackers, just the regular cheese ones, let's not get cute
>redskin peanuts
>pretzel rings or the small square ones (or pretzel goldfish for extra credit)

Don't put granny in the home quite yet tier
>cheez its, which while good are too large for the mix
>smallish croutons (mom's mom does this)
>the dried lo mein noodles you get to put on salads (dad's mom does this)
>mixed nuts as long as you get your retarded little brother to pick all the cashews out and there are no brazil nuts the size of my dick in there
>oyster crackers

Trailer park tier
>cheetos or worse yet cheese balls, this is a holiday party not a viewing of wrestlemania you spliced off your neighbor's cable
>crispix, does that shit look square to you? count six sides with your six fingers you inbred hick
>giant coagulated balls of worcestershire sauce and seasoning salt because you're too fucking lazy to mix your shit properly
>anything sweet at all, the desserts are over there next to the air fryer jackass

Put your head in the oven instead of the chex mix tier
>pretzel sticks or full-size pretzels, what the fuck are you thinking
>popcorn
>any shit you see on a food mom blog like freeze-dried strawberries or candy corn, why are you looking up chex mix recipes on the internet you mongoloid, the ingredients are in the name
>motherfucking goddamn cheerios
>buying the store chex mix and putting it in a bowl like my wife's family did tonight, I can't believe I married into this (even though I did eat half the bowl)

[Shadow the Edgehog (Frost) No.11660005]

>>11659996

>...like life in general, I see a lot of you are doing it the wrong way.

I already know precisely what sort of person you are.

[Anonymous No.11660012]

>>11659996
Eating Chex mix at all is trash. Trying to pretend there are distinctions is like trying to make the case that some above ground pools are somehow not trashy.

[Anonymous No.11660032]

All of the options you listed sound fucking terrible. Try again jackass.

[Anonymous No.11660271]

>any kind of pretzels in god tier

Fucking why? The entire point of making Chex Mix at home is to eliminate the garbage filler that’s in the commercial mix.

[Anonymous No.11660408]

>>11659996
>chex mix
that's for rich people.