/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.11597394]

Do they taste of anything? I'm not Catholic or raised religious at all so I never got a chance to try them.

[Anonymous No.11597405]

No, if anything Styrofoam

[Anonymous No.11597409]

>>11597394
The sweat of the priest's balls I imagine. I heard they always rub each wafer under their nuts to please god.

[Anonymous No.11597416]

>>11597409
you just know they fuck with the sacrament when giving it to little kids

[Anonymous No.11598011]

>>11597394
tasteless. It dissolves in 10 seconds. don't chew it or it will bleed.

[Anonymous No.11598028]

>>11597394
Tastes like raw pork

[Anonymous No.11598031]

>>11598011
I crack it into four equal sized pieces with my tongue, and the let it dissolve in my mouth. I do it for two reasons. The first is respect. The second is that as long as it is still in my mouth, I spend that time meditating and praying. If I don’t, I find my mind wandering, which is the last thing I want to do when I should be devoting my attention to taking God in my mouth.

[Anonymous No.11598077]

>>11597394
they are really disgusting, the first time i tried it as a kid, it had me retching right in front of the priest. Especially if they have you dip in in to wine it becomes vile, because one side will be some sloppy sog, bitter and sour from the wine and the other side is tasteless at best and cardboard at worst, and still firm. They usually deisolve rather quick , but if you try to roll it around in your mouth, it will stick where ever, just shove it in and don't try to taste it, retching in front of the priest and the church is pretty lame

[Anonymous No.11598106]

>>11598077
you must be possessed

[Anonymous No.11598107]

>>11598077
are you retarded? It literally melts in 30 seconds when you leave it on your tongue or push it onto the roof of your mouth

[Anonymous No.11598137]

>>11597394
tastes pretty bland, not really offensive or anything
>>11598077
retard

[Anonymous No.11598140]

>>11598106
i still that that shit in church, but it is just to be nice to be honest, because they always have me tearing up and gagging. An eating in church is pretty messed up because i associate church with dead people and the cracker has dead mother fucking Jesus printed on it.

when school brought us to church on some event when i was a kid, i puked up the food they served in the Church.

Also remember some green napkins with angels parents had when i was a kid, ruined my favorite food and it took several years before i was able to eat taco again

[Anonymous No.11598188]

They are so thin that by the time they reach your tongue the wine has already dissolved most of it. Only poor places use those wafers. Legit places use actual freshly baked bread.

[Anonymous No.11598201]

>>11597394
Taste like cardboard. The kind of cardboard fast food drink carries are made of

[Anonymous No.11598202]

>>11598140
I'm sorry, I didn't realize you were legitimately retarded.

[Anonymous No.11598208]

>>11598140
yup definitely possessed.

[Anonymous No.11598209]

>>11597405
>>11598011
>>11598137
Shouldn't these things taste like Jesus?

[Anonymous No.11598211]

>>11597394
The secret ingredient to my altar bread is acid

[Anonymous No.11598294]

>>11597394
they tase like shit, but its not the point...as the catholic position is literal transubstantiation, the wine and brea are the literal body and blood and quite sacred then....this meant the church had to tackle the crumb issue becuase you cant have jesus crubs hanging around so the host wafers were designed to be the way they are to minimize this(amongst other practical/spiritual considerations)

fun fact, what crubs and wine are left ovr are collected and eventualy deposited in a special sink churches have which is consecrated and just goes straight down into the ground so the sacrement isnt eding up in the sewer

[Anonymous No.11598333]

>>11598294
>catholic churches literally have a hole in the ground full of what they think is actually literally Jesus
As if worshiping idols wasn't enough....

[Anonymous No.11598361]

>>11598294
>consecrated sink
How do they consecrate it tho?

[Anonymous No.11598371]

>>11598294
>>11598361
Please don't tell me there are sacred plumbers. Catholics just seem to make shit up as they go along.

[Anonymous No.11598381]

>>11598333
Its funny when sects that are almost exactly the same as another sect make fun of eachother

[Anonymous No.11598386]

>>11598381
It's as if they don't even bother with the teachings of Jesus and rather become prideful of their branch rather than practice the teachings.

[Anonymous No.11598395]

I used to love these things. At first yeah it tastes like dry wafer but eventually it starts to dissolve and just taste like a potato chip or bread. I kind of low key want to buy a box of them and just eat them like potato chips as a fucking joke snack.

[Anonymous No.11598398]

>>11597394
pretty good with toppings. peanut butter is easy mode, I step it up and put a round of thick sliced pepperoni and a chunk of colby jack.

[Anonymous No.11598404]

>>11598395
Just imagine dude. Communion wafers with some 'racha. Now you're askin for a good time!

[Anonymous No.11598407]

>>11597394
>Do they taste of anything?
Salty coins

[Anonymous No.11598418]

>>11598381
Ain't no fight like a Christian fight.

[Anonymous No.11598461]

>>11597394
Depends what vintage your priest is and when they last cleaned their hands.

[Anonymous No.11598462]

>>11598381
>protestants and catholics
>almost exactly the same

[Anonymous No.11598500]

>>11598294
so, is your stool sacred too? I mean,
you just digested Jesus....

[Anonymous No.11598512]

>>11598371
Making shit up as they go along has literally been the entire MO of the catholic church for the better part of the last 1500 years.

[Anonymous No.11598621]

>>11597394
The body of christ, sleek swimmer's body, all muscled up and toned

[Anonymous No.11598672]

>>11598031
>devoting my attention to taking God in my mouth

[Anonymous No.11598750]

>>11597394
If youve ever had unsalted water crackers thats basically what they are
Very bland, have a semi decent crispness when dry, but basically fall apart in your mouth very quickly. You can also buy unblessed wafers on amazon if you really care, just look up Communion Wafers

[Anonymous No.11598765]

>>11598750
Can one transubstantiate unblessed Catholic wafers into the holy material of another religion? Asking for a friend.

[Anonymous No.11599047]

>>11598209
They do, bland tasteless & unseasoned, literal whitefolk food.

[Anonymous No.11599050]

>>11598765
/x/ wizards would probably be able to guide you.

[Anonymous No.11599103]

>>11597394
tastes like nothing, the wine is nice though

[Anonymous No.11599493]

Post the picture of the guy eating communion wafers and boomer monster like cereal

[Anonymous No.11599513]

>>11598381
>cath*lics are like the rest of Christianity
somebody worships the pope

[Anonymous No.11599516]

>>11597405
This, it melts in your mouth. You're not supposed to chew on them either.

[Anonymous No.11599540]

>non-orthodox communion
Why would it be anything than bread?

[Anonymous No.11599545]

>>11599540
We used fresh bread at my protestant church when I was a kid.

[Anonymous No.11599546]

reminder that discussing alcohol is forbidden on /ck/ but religion threads are a-ok

[Anonymous No.11599556]

>>11599546
Want some cheese to go with that whine?

[Anonymous No.11599571]

They are almost tasteless. Could not even tell you what they resemble.

[Anonymous No.11599627]

>>11598765
There's ANOTHER religion retarded enough to have a concept similar to transubstantiation?

[Anonymous No.11599633]

>>11598209
>Not knowing that Jesus tastes like styrofoam.
Heretic.

[Anonymous No.11599648]

>>11597409
>>11597416
Fucking shitskins everywhere.

[Anonymous No.11599653]

>>11598294
I doubt this is true, I always see priests putting the crumbs in the wine goblet and drinking them along with the rest of the wine, so there's no waste.

[Anonymous No.11599668]

>>11597394
They taste the same way Hallmark Cards smell if that makes any sense..

[Anonymous No.11599690]

>>11598209
>not understanding how transubstantiation works
the incidental forms don't change, things like taste or texture
but the substance changes; that is the underlying reality of the thing

[Anonymous No.11599797]

>>11598140
>school took me to church
That's definitely several violations unless you don't live in burgerland

[Anonymous No.11599821]

>>11599797
fuck the government, they are inferior to the true authority

[Anonymous No.11599822]

>>11599821
Christfags are truly something else

[Anonymous No.11599829]

>>11599822
>nyyuuuuhh they did something positive for themselves that broke the rules, TEACCCHHEEER!
yeah dude you're not a faggot

[Anonymous No.11599845]

>>11598188
If they're heretics sure

[Anonymous No.11599852]

Any Jews here? What is this like?

[Anonymous No.11599860]

>>11598765
Yes. Until they're transubstantiated they're literally just bread and you can do whatever you want with them.

[Anonymous No.11599863]

>>11599852
sweet, airy, delicious.

Also makes the best french toast

[Anonymous No.11599864]

>>11599860
Could you transubstantiate something else, like a piece of steak?

[Anonymous No.11599875]

>>11599864
No, according to the DMG the material components for the spell "transubstantiation" are bread and wine specifically.

[Anonymous No.11599880]

Catholicism is so pathetic

[Anonymous No.11599887]

>>11599829
>my opinion says it's a good thing so it must be good and it must be forced upon others

I could use your argument to force another religion down kids' throats and you'd throw a shitfit guaranteed

In fact, all schoolchildren should worship Satania and offer her both little boy and little girl cummies before every meal

Checkmate Christians

[Anonymous No.11599894]

>>11599887
There is nothing wrong with this desu sempai

[Anonymous No.11599903]

>>11599887
can this be a thing??

[Anonymous No.11599921]

>>11599887
>>11599894
>>11599903
>worshiping worst girl
Baka

[Anonymous No.11599939]

>>11599829
>>11599887
>christfag got so irredeemably btfo he abandoned the thread and is literally shaking right now

Satania wins again baby!

[Anonymous No.11599968]

>>11599864
YOU can't, but the Christ obviously could.
He went with bread and wine since that's what people were eating and drinking back then.

[Anonymous No.11599979]

>>11599968
Would Christ do it for a nutrient shake or something from an aid package if there was a starving African church without bread. Special circumstance

[Anonymous No.11600116]

>>11599540
>>11599545
Its supposed to be a reenactment of the last supper which the bible states was for Passover. Leavened bread is not allowed for Passover because Passover itself is a reenactment of the Jewish exodus from Egypt and the eponymous Passover refers to the holy spirit passing over the houses of marked Jewish families so as not to kill their first borns along with the Egyptians. God knew that the Egyptians would be pretty peeved at the Jews that their God killed all the Egyptian children so he told His people to be prepared to gtfo therefore they wouldn't have time to wait for yeast to leaven their bread which they would need for the journey and they were also told eat a filling meal of sheep or goat and to use the blood to mark their house for Passover. As such, Jesus and his disciples who were practicing Jews would have been eating a meal consisting of unleavened bread on the night he was betrayed.

[Anonymous No.11600139]

>>11599648

[Anonymous No.11600182]

>>11600139
Is that you?

[Anonymous No.11600342]

>>11597405
They have this slightly burnt taste, can't really describe it. I guess it might vary a bit from region to region.

[Anonymous No.11600425]

Oblaty are much better.

[Anonymous No.11600489]

>>11597394
like yeast from Mary's pussy.

[Anonymous No.11600492]

>>11597394
here in Canada they taste like cum tbqh

[Anonymous No.11600503]

>>11599852
You know you can just buy it any any fucking grocery store right?

[Anonymous No.11600512]

>>11600425
Gotta cover it in honey though, or else you won’t have riches in the new year

[Anonymous No.11600519]

>>11599852
Very filling. It's a butter and egg dump

[Anonymous No.11600527]

>>11599887
>when the bait makes them samefag 8 times
going to be a good day

[Anonymous No.11601067]

>>11600489
The wafers are unleavened

[Anonymous No.11601081]

>>11597394
The Body of Christ wafers/crackers taste like rice paper. Or... like a piece of paper with some kind of glue or grain taste.

The wine tasted like rotten, sour, apples. Also its gross that everyone shares off of one cup.

[Anonymous No.11601148]

>>11599797
Not necessarily. Schools can provide bussing to religious institutions. I forget what court case it was but I'm pretty sure it had something to do with bussing jewish kids from school to temple.

[Anonymous No.11601163]

>>11597394
Only reason I went to church was for these. Tasted sweet to me.

[Anonymous No.11601189]

>>11599690
>Neoplatonism

Nice heresy you've got there. Communion wafers literally turn into the flesh of Jesus Christ as you consume them. Pic related: you.

[Anonymous No.11601255]

>>11601189
>heresy
>says the guy literally breaking the first commandant

[Anonymous No.11601269]

>>11601255
Yeah no.

[Anonymous No.11601277]

>>11601269
>praying to literal pagan gods
>taking the word of some guy in Rome as divine
Yeah

[Anonymous No.11601426]

>>11601277
>takes the word of some guys who wrote the books of the bible which were assembled and translated by catholics as divine
>splits from the true church and then splinters into as many factions opposing each other as stars in the sky
>b-but muh catholics are the antichrist
Protty dogs, everybody.

[Anonymous No.11601430]

>>11601426
This. Absolutely btfo that divisive demon lad.

[Anonymous No.11601447]

>>11601430
>child molesters backing each other up
thick as thieves

[Anonymous No.11601469]

>>11601447
Wow what an original shit post. Its like you have no theological leg to stand on so you gave up. Satan has corrupted you and the child molesters not mutually exclusive.

[Anonymous No.11601484]

>>11599852
Literally just brioche, there's no way any shtetl goblin actually invented this out of whole cloth.

They also like to pretend that hummus and baba ghanoush is Israeli cuisine when none of those coin clippers had so much as seen an eggplant prior to 1946.

[Anonymous No.11601486]

*nails shitpost to cathedral door*
*causes countless of religious conflicts*
*destroys any hope of a combined effort against Islam*
*shits all over europe*

The eternal g*rm just can't help himself, can he?

[Anonymous No.11601500]

>>11600116
That's interesting to me because I'm Orthodox and they use basically a baguette for their Eucharist. Am very curious as to how they decided to use that instead despite the fact that it's objectively much more delicious.

[Anonymous No.11601501]

>>11601484
It's worse than brioche because it doesn't contain butter or milk.

[Anonymous No.11601507]

What happens if a dog eats the wafers after they have been blessed and become flesh?

[Anonymous No.11601509]

>>11600503
Goyim who eat it are cursed.

[Anonymous No.11601513]

>>11601501
I helped a bunch of khazar milk cows make this once when I was in college and they definitely used milk

[Anonymous No.11601514]

>>11601486
>burn and drown people that don't want to be part of your church
>but they're the ones that are caused "countless religious conflict" when they attempted to fight back

[Anonymous No.11601532]

>>11601507
Priest goes to hell

[Anonymous No.11601534]

>>11601486
>eternal g*rm
Reformation was mainly catastrophic to the HRE, i.e. the German part of Europe. If anything it was the (Catholic) French that abused reformation to destabilize the HRE during the thirty years' war and it was the french that destroyed the effort of a combined effort against islam with the Franco-Ottoman alliance.

[Anonymous No.11601539]

>>11601501
>>11600519
hmmm

[Anonymous No.11601545]

>>11601469
don't shoot the messenger

[Anonymous No.11601566]

>>11601500
I don't know, I know early in the church's history there was a move to remove Jewish traditions as prerequisites (I.e. circumcision) it could have been part of that and some ancient patriarchs adopted it while others didn't. I'd never given it much thought I always assumed all Eucharist was unleavened despite denomination. There's probably an article out there somewhere that explains it.

[Anonymous No.11601656]

>>11599653
some times the host is ruined beyond use and its disolved in water and poured down the special sink, also they was the dish and chalice that the wine and bread are on and the water from the washing must go down the sink.....they also use the sink to dispose of consecrated water or oil, and any water used to was especialy sacred objects

and here, believe it
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Piscina

[Anonymous No.11601657]

>>11598333
btw, nice picture there, worth notting that many lutheren churches have this sink too...so do anglican and episcopal churches

[Anonymous No.11601680]

>>11598462
ever sit through a lutheran(old school), anglican/episopal, or catholic service?....theyre actualy quite similar and doctrineal difference often amounts to hair splitting and semantics.......lutheranism and anglicanism are actualy bourn more of problems with church polotics that massive doctrinal differences

[Anonymous No.11601731]

>>11601680
Why do you even do the eucharist if you don't believe in it?

[Anonymous No.11601802]

>>11601680
This now a dunking on Pr*testantism thread

[Anonymous No.11601804]

>>11601802
>>11601680

[Anonymous No.11601807]

>>11601802

[Anonymous No.11601811]

>>11598294
I dont remember that. All the crumbs collected with the giant spatulas are dumped into a chalice and drank with water by the priest.

[Anonymous No.11601815]

>>11601802
dd

[Anonymous No.11601816]

>>11601802
Fuck it, let's include leftycaths in this as well

[Anonymous No.11601818]

>>11601802

[Anonymous No.11601819]

>>11601807
Nice, protty dogs reach their true pinnacle of worship, lol!

[Anonymous No.11601826]

>>11601802
. .

[Anonymous No.11601849]

>>11601534
>wahhhh its some ubermensch fault that i fucked everything up wahh
Stupid krauts.

[Anonymous No.11601902]

>>11597394
one time with a buddy we sneaked in our school's chapel and ate the bread and stole the cheese and wine.

good times. we're going to hell tho.

[Anonymous No.11601910]

>>11601426
>hurr durr the scripture isn't divine but some guy in a pointy hat is

[Anonymous No.11601911]

>>11601902
>stole the cheese and wine
>the cheese and wine
>the cheese

[Anonymous No.11601914]

>>11601911
Yeah man, what kind of backwards church did you go to without cheese?

[Anonymous No.11601917]

>>11601910
>hurr durr all you have to do is believe in jebus to go to heaven. rape, murder, suck as many dicks as your little mouth can handle, you'll still go to heaven if you believe in the jebus!

[Anonymous No.11601918]

>>11601911
>his church does not serve cheese to go with the wafers
sad

[Anonymous No.11601927]

>>11601804
>>11601807
>>11601819
>it's not REAL communion unless it's presented on a fuckhuge gold plate surrounded by graven images of totally not repurposed pagan gods and served by a child molester chanting a dead language
The absolute state of the catholicuck church..

[Anonymous No.11601940]

>>11601927
nice try dog I'm Orthodox

Also it kinda helps if you actually believe in the thing

[Anonymous No.11601947]

>>11601917
Yeah, you're right. How could I be so foolish? Accepting myself as impure and the word of God as ultimate truth and allowing myself to be cleansed by the blood sacrafice of the Son would never suffice.
The only REAL real way to get into heaven is to pay some guy living in a castle a week's salary for the dried lefty pinky of Saint Anglelines De Talmine the Dog Whipper of Belfast and pray to her to pray for me every night before I go to bed. That'll work.

[Anonymous No.11601955]

>>11601911
>his church didn't hand out cheese

[Anonymous No.11601967]

>>11601947
>citing practices from the 1500's that have long since been abolished to criticize the modern day catholic church
>i believe in jebus god will let me into heaven now *sings and claps*

[Anonymous No.11601990]

>>11601967
Oh so what you're saying is the catholic church is a fallible establishment of man that is subject to change with shifts in public opinion? Surely if these rituals were divinly mandated they wouldn't have been discontinued simply because they were unpopular. It almost sounds like this organization doesn't actually care about the word of God and the true message of Jesus' cleansing sacrafice but instead only about it's own self-perpetuation.

[Anonymous No.11602001]

>>11601486
>Hey guys I don't think we should have to pay to get into heaven. It doesn't have any basis in the bible.
>WTF why are you ruining Europe?!
This is your mind on repurposed paganism.

[Anonymous No.11602011]

>>11601990
>hurr durr anybody can make their own sect and rules and that's the word of god! i'll just follow which one is the easiest!

[Anonymous No.11602035]

>>11602011
>why are we listening to some Italian dude about what we have to do for our salvation? Shouldn't we just accept Jesus and study the Bible? It is God's divine infallible word, after all.
>No! You can't leave! It's not allowed! Only pointy hat man can read the Bible in his special way so he can tell you how to actually get into heaven! Now pay your tithe!

[Anonymous No.11602040]

>>11598294
not a fact, that’s not that they do.

[Anonymous No.11602045]

>>11602035
>Catholics aren't allowed to disagree with or criticize the pope
>i purposely exaggerate things about other branches of the church to make my cakewalk "branch" seem legitimate

[Anonymous No.11602055]

>>11598077
i threw up in church once but it was bc i was a complete sperg as a kid. you’re a faggot if a shitty cracker made you puke

[Anonymous No.11602062]

>>11598188
no they don’t

[Anonymous No.11602076]

>>11597394
I spent a while in the seminary and had every kind of host imaginable traveling around to parishes. They’re usually either smooth and glossy with a barely discernible wondervread flavor or coarse and dusty with a barely discernible hint of what almost tastes like sourdough.

[Anonymous No.11602094]

>>11602035
>strawmanning this hard
None of this is anything close to what the Catholic Church actually teaches.
Tell me, if the Catholic Church is so wrong why do you have such a hard time coming up with legitimate criticisms of it? Why do you have to make up lies about it if the things it actually teaches are so manifestly false?

[Anonymous No.11602145]

>>11602062
Orthodox churches do, maybe he's confused?

[Anonymous No.11602288]

>>11598209
Being a Catholic tradition, shouldn't you be asking whether or not they should taste like infant genital flesh?

[Anonymous No.11602298]

>>11597394
>I'm not Catholic or raised religious at all so I never got a chance to try them.

You can buy them on amazon, retard.

[Anonymous No.11602343]

>>11602076
t. "Priest" from "Blood Meridian"

[Anonymous No.11602350]

so im confused...is the digested lord and savior still considerd sacred? should i be saving my toilet remnants the morning after church for consecration or proper burial?

[Anonymous No.11602364]

>>11602343
nah I dropped out before I became a priest

[Anonymous No.11602393]

>>11597394
the Sihks have all religions beat when it comes to holy food, I went to a temple once and the guy gives you handfuls of this wet dough stuff. it looks like absolute garbage but it actually tastes really good

[Anonymous No.11602418]

>>11602350
>so im confused
Strong start!

>is the digested lord and savior still considerd sacred? should i be saving my toilet remnants the morning after church for consecration or proper burial?

None of these church traditions have anything to do with what ideals and behaviors Christ suggested his acquaintances to live by. But I will give you my personal advice, friendo. Save your toilet remnants. Gather them up in a glass jar. Treasure them. Then slop them onto your dinner meals and eat your own shit.

[Anonymous No.11602434]

>>11599648
>he takes religion seriously
>in 2018

[Anonymous No.11602519]

funny thing, they make some in my city, but priests only buy the most perfect ones, so there's usually lot's of them discarded or selled pretty cheap, i use to eat them alone, or with condensed milk, like sweet chips, also low caloried

[Anonymous No.11602884]

>>11602434
Nope, literally no one really believes any religious muck, they just parrot it as a tribal virtue signal which is its real power. If people really believed and applied it, the current world order of mammon worship would collapse.

[Anonymous No.11603178]

>>11598209
It's called transubstantiation. The bread magically becomes the literal flesh of Jesus, but God makes it look, taste, and feel exactly the same as before. It's ritualistic cannibalism for Catholicucks, basically.

[Anonymous No.11603234]

>>11601917
Only protty dogs think like that. Catholicucks think you need deeds + faith.

[Anonymous No.11603260]

>>11601731
im agnostic, i just did religious studdies as a hobby...ive snuck communion a few times( learned the motions well enough to not be noticed)....im a fan of the anglican position, spiritual transubstansiation over a total pysical one....lets them get away with better bread ;)

[Anonymous No.11603262]

>>11601811
your mostly right, but when the cups are washed the water mut go down the special sink, also if the bread has been soe how soiled beyond use it gets disolved and poured down the special sink....aparently if you dispose of transformed wine you can be excomunicated or, if a priest, striped of office and layicized

[Anonymous No.11603294]

>>11601277
>>taking the word of some guy in Rome as divine
this is easy....christ ordained the apostles, peter esentialy starts the church and ordains followers to preach the gospel...its called apostolic sucession, it lends a continuity and preserved tradition along with authority grounded in a line stretching back to christ theoretically(as opposed to the protestants who have zero unity and no sense of authority outside of demagoguery

protestantism arguable opened up the faith to the total chaos of democracy

[Anonymous No.11603521]

>>11599852
it's delicious, a shame I only eat it a few times a year.

[Anonymous No.11603616]

>>11599648
4chan's that way pall

[Anonymous No.11603620]

>>11601849
they never really understand the irony do they.

[Anonymous No.11603642]

>>11603234
Kind of, but the "deed" can be a simple act of confession or a huge postmortem donation from your estate to the church.

[Anonymous No.11603660]

>>11597394
See for yourself. They don't check ID at the church door. You can even turn up late and nobody will stop you from going in. Just sit at the back, imitate everybody else to work out when you should stand up or sit down or kneel, move your lips wordlessly when everybody talks so it looks like you're saying something, and when everybody lines up in the aisle join the line. Watch the actions of the people in front of you to know what to do and where to walk afterwards. When you receive the Eucharist, say "Amen," in case you can't hear them.

Oh, and dip your finger in the holy water and make the sign of the cross before going in the church. Kneel to the altar whenever you walk across the aisle.

[Anonymous No.11604202]

>>11602045
is catholic actually a more difficult religion or is this just some NAMBLA cope?

[Anonymous No.11604379]

They taste better when paired with your favourite soft drink

[Anonymous No.11604462]

When the pope visited my country, the local church produced so many wafers for the pope's high that after the mass there were so many leftovers that the lay ministers shove 5 of them on our tongues for a few Sundays.

[Anonymous No.11604463]

>>11604462
*high mass

[Anonymous No.11604467]

>>11601819
Go lose another war pope blower

[Anonymous No.11604492]

>>11598333
Heh leave the Goddess (Mary) alone. We did right in crucifying that Galilean...
Signed: Roman

[Anonymous No.11604507]

>>11599968
Body and Blood are of OUR God Dionysus Who gave us bread and wine from Heaven. Galileans ripping off Pagan Rituals and Holidays such as Yule and Easter (Germanic Goddess of Spring) again...

[Anonymous No.11604606]

>>11604462
That's definitely false. Doing so would be a grave violation of church doctrine. You may only recieve communion once a day (twice if you're altar serving two masses).

[Anonymous No.11604648]

>>11598333
>>11598294
There's a reason why this belief has continued until the present day. We only need to look at what the early Church thought about this. This is from the writings of Ignatius, who learned from a disciple of St Peter and later became Bishop of Antioch. This writing was written 10 years after the apostle St John died.
Ignatius of Antioch
"I have no taste for corruptible food nor for the pleasures of this life. I desire the bread of God, WHICH IS THE FLESH OF JESUS CHRIST, who was of the seed of David; and for drink I desire his blood, which is love incorruptible" (Letter to the Romans 7:3 [A.D. 110]).

[Anonymous No.11604664]

>>11597409
what are you on about? they rub their balls on my lips and chin to please god

[Anonymous No.11604685]

>>11604648
Furthermore, the practice of the Eucharist is biblical. Let's examine an episode in John 6. Jesus talks about the Eucharist. In John 6:51-52, after Jesus talks about the Eucharist literally being His Body,
"‘I am the living bread which came down from heaven; if any one eats of this bread, he will live for ever; and the bread which I shall give for the life of the world is my flesh.’ The Jews then disputed among themselves, saying, ‘How can this man give us his flesh to eat?’". The Jews were shocked at this teaching. After Jesus clarified Himself, his listeners now understood what Jesus meant. He then repeated His words. There were no corrections or attempts to soften what He said. This is what happens in John 6:53-56, which states that, "Truly, truly, I say to you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of man and drink his blood, you have no life in you; he who eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day. For my flesh is food indeed, and my blood is drink indeed. He who eats my flesh and drinks my blood abides in me, and I in him". Jesus made NO attempt to correct misunderstandings, and his followers no longer speaking metaphorically. If they were right, then Jesus would have corrected them. He does this, as seen in Matthew 16:9-12,
(9 Do you still not understand? Don’t you remember the five loaves for the five thousand, and how many basketfuls you gathered? 10 Or the seven loaves for the four thousand, and how many basketfuls you gathered? 11 How is it you don’t understand that I was not talking to you about bread? But be on your guard against the yeast of the Pharisees and Sadducees.” 12 Then they understood that he was not telling them to guard against the yeast used in bread, but against the teaching of the Pharisees and Sadducees.). But He didn't. This was the biggest apostasy of His ministry (John 6:64). This is the only record we have of people falling away from Jesus for His teachings.

[Anonymous No.11604702]

>>11597394
They taste like nothing and dissolve on your tongue.

t. Anglican Church boi who swung around a thurible during church for like 4 years before becoming a fedora tipping atheist.

[Anonymous No.11606665]

>>11597394
They're nice. I like them.

[Anonymous No.11606690]

Why don't Catholics eat bread during sacrament like us Mormons? I know we dont do wine so glass houses and all of that, but Jesus ate bread during the last supper, not some strange cracker thing.

[Anonymous No.11606713]

>>11598294
That seems pharisee af

[Anonymous No.11606731]

>>11601486
>Hey guys the catholic church is corrupt and you shouldnt need to pay to see god, also fuck the jews and their lies, okay? Praise jesus
>Autistic Amerimutt sitting sweaty in his basement
>"Fucking germans ruined europe"

[Anonymous No.11606735]

>>11606690
Already been answered here>>11600116
TL;DR Jesus was not eating leavened bread at the last supper, but would have ordinarily like at the wedding or the fish and loaves event.

[Anonymous No.11606739]

>>11601513
T-their own?

[Anonymous No.11606743]

>>11606731
> shouldn't need to pay to see God
Well are you gonna pay for my shrooms then?

[Anonymous No.11606744]

>>11606735
But it's not just unleavened. It's crispy.

[Anonymous No.11606754]

>>11606744
My friend what exactly do you think happens to flour and water if its baked without yeast farts built up inside? I'll answer: if its a chunk form its hard tack and only edible after soaking in liquid for a significant amount of time if its in a thin edible shape its a communion wafer.

[Anonymous No.11606824]

>>11606754
I do it all the time because I'm lazy and sometimes just want to fill my belly. It's dense, soft, and chewy. I know you can make hard tack like that, but nobody calls hard tack bread. Just like everybody refers to the communion wafer as a wafer.

[Anonymous No.11606851]

>>11606824
The wafers are a form of unleavened bread and the unleavened bread part is significant because it was Passover. It being Passover is significant because Jesus is the sacrificial lamb of the new covenant which is a role reversal from the original Passover and covenant where Jews would roast a lamb or goat as a sacrifice to God. God gave us His only son and sacrificed Him for the sins of the world on Passover. I'm not telling you to convert but you asked the question and the answer remains the same: because its unleavened bread.

[Anonymous No.11606923]

>>11597394
My dad always told me and my brother that we weren't allowed to partake in the communion because we weren't baptised. Whenever he was passed the big silver tray with the wafers or little silver cups full juice he would pass them to the kids beside me and my bro. I've always wondered if he was lying about that. We didn't go to church long enough to find out.

[Anonymous No.11606938]

feels pretty reddit in here, think i'm just going to leave.

[Anonymous No.11607008]

>>11601807
>gluten free communion kit
no idea why but this made me laugh my ass off

[Anonymous No.11607168]

>>11604606
>You may only recieve communion once a day (twice if you're altar serving two masses).
Wouldn't one serving of five pieces still count as only one communion?

[Anonymous No.11607207]

I remember when I first went to church with my mom and my autistic ass blurted out, "Ooooh a snack!" when they passed around communion. My autism really saved me there, since we stopped going after that and I was able to avoid being brainwashed.

[Anonymous No.11607376]

>>11597394

>Grew up in Calvinist Orthodox Presbyterian church.
>Passed Catechism, had Baptism, got Communion.

The wafer tasted of pure condensed salt, and the wine had to be the sweetest sugared red wine in existence.