[ 3 / biz / cgl / ck / diy / fa / ic / jp / lit / sci / vr / vt ] [ index / top / reports ] [ become a patron ] [ status ]
2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/ck/ - Food & Cooking

View post   
File: 32 KB, 652x368, 1542181156382.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
11472657 No.11472657 [Reply] [Original]

>mom stops cooking altogether last year
>can't flip an egg without breaking yolks, can't flip anything in a pan without using too much force and sliding it out
>can't tell when any meat is done
>have been eating pic related and microwave meals for dinner for 6 months now
How the FUCK do I stop this shit? I feel like I'm fucking dying every damn day now.

>> No.11472659

>>11472657
>can't flip an egg without breaking yolks
Make scrambled eggs then.

>> No.11472667

>>11472657
>>can't flip an egg without breaking yolks
That's fine. Just continue to eat it as is. You're just cooking for yourself, aren't you?
>>can't flip anything in a pan without using too much force and sliding it out
That's fine. Use a spatula.
>>can't tell when any meat is done
Just cook it through then. Set a good time for it, let's say you're roasting chicken breasts in the oven. Start off at 30 minutes, half on each side. Turns out too tough? Reduce the total time by 5 minutes the next time. Still? Drop it down even further. Do it till you're happy with the result.
If not, you could just buy a meat probe.
Also, just follow recipes. Preferably video ones, if you don't have the technique. If it's too daunting for you, then just look for something simpler.

>> No.11472675

>>11472657
You fucking make some effort into learning how to cook instead of staying lazy and ignorant, just like you would for any other skill. It's really that simple.

>> No.11472676

>>11472657
tell her she'd never get grandkids in the future if she doesnt get her shit together as a woman

>> No.11472923

>>11472657
>feel like I'm fucking dying
that'd be the vitamin deficiencies

>> No.11472935

Learn how to do shit instead of relying on others. She's been cooking food for your entitled ass your whole life and you sound like an ungrateful piece of shit.

>> No.11473010

>>11472657
>white bread, peanuts, and sugar goop
>I feel like I'm fucking dying
can't imagine why

>> No.11473018

Instead of giving up you should keep on cooking and become actually half decent at it

Dont just give up and start eating microwave meals

>> No.11473112

>>11472676
She will never get grandkids because OP is a massive faggot.

>> No.11473234

>>11472935
>ungrateful
What the fuck are you talking about, I tried to cook and failed. It is a genetic, mental problem.

>> No.11473328

>>11473234
If you mentally or physically are only capable of producing PB&J sandwiches and microwaving frozen dinners, then that's all you deserve to have. Your mother has been too kind to you.

>> No.11473346

watch a bunch of youtube videos

>> No.11473372

>>11472657
Steam your eggs, put enough water to cover your pinky nail. Put on high, once boiling gently place eggs in, cover, and turn down to medium. After 7 minutes remove from heat and put pot under faucet and fill with cold water. After a few minutes egg will be cool to touch, crack eggs and "rinse" shells off. Dry and cut eggs and enjoy runny yolks.

Look up food wishes Soft Hard Boiled eggs.

>> No.11473397

>>11473234
Then just die.

>> No.11473593

>>11473234
>I tried to cook and failed. It is a genetic, mental problem.
It's a mental problem all right: you have a shit attitude. You just have to try again and again until you get it right. Obviously some people get it quicker then others, but unless you are a drooling retard, you can learn.

>> No.11473613
File: 774 KB, 720x533, 3.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
11473613

>>11473593
I tested 110 IQ yet I know literal third worlders who can make a stir fry or an entire family meal with no problem. This isn't fucking fair. I burned a few pieces of bacon and broke an egg yolk so I just figured I wasn't talented enough to cook and just stopped.

I fucking hate this. I'm 21 yet I feel like an 80 year old.

>> No.11473629

>>11473613
Anybody can cook, you can have a room temperature IQ and cook. Just start simple and learn basic techniques and understand you're going to fuck up sometimes. All your problems have solutions, but it sounds like you're impatient and get mad for no reason.

Make sure you use a non-stick pan for eggs which is in good condition and not scratched up. Let the eggs firm up a little so they hold together and be gentle when you slide the spatula under.

Use a spatula or spoon something to flip stuff and stir, don't try swinging the pan around like a TV chef.

Get an instant read meat thermometer.

>> No.11473632

>>11473613
Go eat a bag of dicks. Do you know why borderline retarded thirdworlders manage to learn how to cook? Because when they try to pull a 'Waaah cooking's hard, I'm not talented' their father/mother/slaveowner smacks them, then tells them that they'll starve to death. So they try until they get it right.
And as for your attitude: you'll never amount to anything if you only play to your strengths. Source: been there, done that.

>> No.11473643

>>11473613
Boy, my generation is fucking retarded. We are really screwed

>> No.11473645

>>11472657
Nigga, omelettes are cash. Just make cheese omelettes on toast with beans. I learned how at fucking 30, using YouTube, so you got no excuse.

>> No.11473651

>>11473234
>Muh genetics
>Muh mental problem

Fuck me you are a state, aren’t you? Just give up and die.

>> No.11473665

>>11473613
>tried it a couple of times
>gave up
Is this how you handle everything else? Enjoy mediocrity.

>> No.11473675
File: 90 KB, 750x823, 1541605082151.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
11473675

>>11473613
Are you an actual fucking child. You don't just learn to cook instantly. Instead of giving up after screwing up a few times keep trying and learn from your mistakes. Maybe you'd be decent if you didn't have such a shit fucking attitude.

>> No.11473686

>>11472657
If you suck dick at cooking just boil everything and season it after. It is so easy to learn to cook proper but honestly, if you are here asking like this the boiling might already be complicated enough so that's that.

>> No.11473697
File: 64 KB, 433x433, 1525820883525.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
11473697

>>11472657
hey anon, I'm poor now and don't have money to go do stuff other than camping so I started taking the time to cook at home
some other anon just mentioned watching the Julia Child "The Way to Cook" video series last night and I found it on YouTube. I was so blown away by how helpful it is for a cooking retard like me that I watched the first 3 vids straight through. Going to buy some food and start cooking along on payday

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL__xTNgGCROORsc9zWVKBXIGLLr9qkb9q

>> No.11473733

Its ok everybody, OP is clearly on the spectrum

>> No.11473754

>>11472657
>can't flip an egg without breaking yolks
Use more oil, use a silicone spatula or a fish turner, and if nothing else, just make scrambled eggs.
>can't flip anything in a pan without using too much force and sliding it out
Flip with a tool and stop trying to be a boss bitch TV celebrity chef. You're not.
>can't tell when any meat is done
Use a thermometer. Wal-Mart sells a Thermapen knockoff for $10.
>How the FUCK do I stop this shit?
https://www.amazon.com/Wheres-Mom-Now-That-Need/dp/0961539011
Buy a used copy of this book for literally under a dollar and read it.

>> No.11473772

Your post reads as if your mother has suddenly forgotten how to do all of these things.

>> No.11473778

>>11473629
>room temperature IQ
Holy kek, is that in degrees Celsius or degrees Freedom?

>> No.11473860

>>11473613
>110 IQ
Dumb roastie, unironically too stupid to cook.

>> No.11473865

Why flip yo eggs tho?

>> No.11473872

>>11473860
>>11473613

There a restaurant near me where all the kitchen staff have down syndrome.

I havent tried it.

Also a cafe with the same setup called downies and brownies

>> No.11473882

>>11473234
>>11473613
Cooking's not some magical ability where you're either born as Julia Child or completely useless. You need to practice to get good, just like any other skill. If there's anything you're not sure about, the internet has guides and videos for just about everything.
Try starting with something simple, like marinara sauce: there's really not much to fuck up with it, assuming you can chop an onion without losing your fingers. Once you're confident that you can make it without setting your house on fire, there's plenty of room to deviate from the recipe (e.g. adding chopped mushrooms/ground beef with the onions, and olives with the bell pepper). If you're using canned tomatoes, check the label before adding any sugar: there's a good chance that they have it in already.
https://en.wikibooks.org/wiki/Cookbook:Marinara_Sauce

>> No.11474027

>>11473882
Wrong, cooking is so intuitive that you don't even need to practice.

>> No.11474122

>>11472657
Why the fuck would you flip an egg?

>> No.11474131

>>11472657
Your mother sucks.

>> No.11474202

>>11473772
Kek that’s how I read it

>> No.11474210

>>11473613
>I feel like an 80 year old.
Nah mate most 80 yr olds I know can cook as long as they don't have dementia.

>> No.11474214

>>11472657
Why did your mom stop cooking? If she is depressed or something maybe you should worry more about her than your stomach.

>> No.11474215

>>11473234
God you sound like the most worthless piece of shit. Go wallow in self pity somewhere else

>> No.11474280

>>11473882
>following directions is a skill
giving directions is a skill, get the right recipe

>> No.11474311

>>11474280
Following directions must be a skill because I know way to many people that can't or refuse to do it. They seem to have the attitude of why bother looking or trying myself when I can just have someone do it for me.

>> No.11474965

Start with really really simple things like egg sandwiches and upgrade from there. Move your egg onto a lightly buttered bagel and fry up a couple pieces of bacon and put that on top of a slice of cheddar cheese.

>> No.11475270

>>11473882
Wrong. Low IQ people will never grasp cooking no matter how much they practice. Room temps are genetically programmed to eat either berries theyve gathered or eat the meat they hunted and gave to homo superior to cook for the tribe. Just give up OP. Exit bag.

>> No.11475285

>>11472657
you have to try to cook to learn to cook. maybe watch a few youtube videos.

>> No.11475290

>>11475270
>homo superior
Are you,, the uhh...*snicker* homo *giggles* superior....*bahahahahhaahhaha*

>> No.11475311

>>11472657
>>mom stops cooking altogether last year
Why

>> No.11475360

>>11472657
Maybe look at why she stopped cooking?
More work so less time? Disease?

In any case if you not good at cooking maybe she can teach you how. I bet she would find it easier too start cooking again if someone helped her out in the kitchen. You could start with some way prep work and later she could tach you the more advanced stuff.