/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.11427860]

hi /ck/ what sort of cooking-related injuries have you endured?

i've cut myself, learned not to cook greasy things naked, and gotten a few burns, but nothing notable.

[Anonymous No.11427867]

Air-flipped a pancake and it landed on my tummy instead of the pan.
Never air-flip the first one, lads.

[Anonymous No.11427884]

>>11427867
despite your outcome, i now feel the need to try to air-flip a pancake

[Anonymous No.11427911]

>>11427884
I should specify; when I say pancake I mean the kind you probably call a crepe.

[Anonymous No.11427926]

God i used to work in a kitchen so i have quite a few scare from burns along my arm. My hands have a ton of tiny nicks and cuts. With some the worst being cutting right into my thumb nail. Honestly i got out pretty good. Some of my coworkers had whole arms full of burns and cuts. The worst offender of kitchen related injuries was the pizza oven. Come in to quick or if not paying attention you bump your arm on the top or bottom and that is nasty little burn.

[Anonymous No.11427952]

>>11427860
I respond like Frankenstein to fire so I haven't gotten anything too bad just a couple grease burns

[Anonymous No.11427981]

Worked in kitchens for decades. I've cut off/burned almost every part of my hands, broke a toe, got electrocuted half a dozen times, slipped and dunked my hand in a fryer, etc. The worst gore I ever saw was a cook absentmindedly reach over the lid of a can he just opened to grab something. Cut him to the bone. Those lids (and broken china) will get you fierce

[Anonymous No.11428030]

>>11427860
>hi /ck/ what sort of cooking-related injuries have you endured?
Worst I have done is lost some eyebrows over a flash inside of a grill as I opened the lid.

[Anonymous No.11428035]

>>11427860
>burnt the back of my hand on the oven grills while making shepard's pie
>bf thinks I've been in a fight or something

[Anonymous No.11428130]

>>11428030
been there. being eyebrowless for a week sucked

[Anonymous No.11428157]

>>11428035
maybe if you we're some scrappy French Canadian bitch he wouldn't assume it.

[Anonymous No.11428170]

>>11428130
>been there. being eyebrowless for a week sucked
I wear saftey sunglasses, but some still stick over the top. They got cooked. I also keep short hair, so that was no issue. I always know better when the grill is putting out a good bit of smoke that IF I open it, it will flash. Sometimes I keep a spray bottle just to combat it quickly, other times I want to get some good burn on the food.

[Anonymous No.11428182]

Accidentally boiled my penis and ate it

[Anonymous No.11428183]

>>11427860
I used to be a chef like op, then I took an Arrow to the knee

[Anonymous No.11428189]

>>11427867
How do you get a pancake that hot

[Anonymous No.11428205]

>>11428157
Huh?

[Anonymous No.11428217]

I slipped on a wet floor, working in my Dad's restaurant, and broke my leg. Now I just lay down the sic beats while feeding my drug habit.

[Anonymous No.11428220]

>>11427860
I cut off a bit of my thumb with a mandolin.

[Anonymous No.11428236]

>>11427860
Here's my most recent, not my fault either, lesson is don't work with stupid people.

[Anonymous No.11428246]

>>11428182
how did it a taste and do you still have the recipe?

[Anonymous No.11428271]

>>11427867
trying to figure this one out. Did the crepe cling to you for a while?

[Anonymous No.11428277]

>>11428271
Seconds. It was quite hot and since it was the first in the batch there was more fat on it since the pan was freshly oiled.

[Anonymous No.11428280]

this is why don't cook very often
and when i do i usually just throw stuff in a crock pot and leave

[Anonymous No.11428294]

>>11428236
story?

[Anonymous No.11428308]

>>11428236
>don't work with stupid people
Why don't you have that bandaged up? Seems like you fit in there just fine.

[Anonymous No.11428335]

>>11428308
Looks like we have us a medical expert.
Why don't you explain to us all what bandaging it would accomplish?

[Anonymous No.11428336]

>>11427860
OP, is that your pic?

[Anonymous No.11428340]

>>11427860
sliced the tip of my ring finger pretty good a few years back, still feel it when I play guitar

[Anonymous No.11428371]

Was on a camping trip and being the only person that can cook a damn thing I was making breakfast
One impatient asshole decided the bacon was ready despite literally just putting it in the pan so a small tussle ensued and he grabbed the pan of hot oil and bacon and splashed it all over me. The other lady woke up from the audible pain and slapped the guy with the still hot pan
From there forward we agreed to never let that guy on out trips and for the rest of it he had to cook his own food and got mad that it tasted like shit
My dumb ass should have gotten medical assistance but thankfully a small river was nearby so I just cleaned off what I could in it

[Anonymous No.11428470]

>>11428236
>those blisters filled with pus
Are they still letting you handle food you walking contaminant?

[Anonymous No.11428520]

>>11427867
>using tummy as a man

[Anonymous No.11429011]

>>11428335
You have a moderate sized 2nd degree burn with a couple of large blisters. They're going to get ripped open working on a line. This is both, and hazard for you and a sanitary/body fluid issue for your employer. A burn this large would warrant a trip to the ER on your employer's dime.

[Anonymous No.11429027]

>>11427860
I've burned myself and cut myself before.
I've never actually known anyone to cook naked. I thought it was just a meme, but people actually do it?

[Anonymous No.11429036]

>>11428035
I want to climb her

[Anonymous No.11429039]

>>11429027
Yeah my bf loves my naked apron.

[Anonymous No.11429042]

>>11429011
You did not answer the question; what would bandaging do?
Bandaged arms aren't sanitary in a kitchen either, you know.
For that matter, what's an ER going to do? Don't fucking waste their time with that shit. Take some time off to heal up or do work that doesn't get you directly into contact with the food. Bandages would do absolutely no good here.

[Anonymous No.11429057]

>>11428520
>assuming someone's gender
It's almost 2019, you know.

[Anonymous No.11429189]

>>11429042
>Bandages would do absolutely no good here
The arm should be bandaged and covered with a long sleeve shirt (like a chef coat). The bandage keeps the bacteria away from your wound and collects the pus that comes out of the blisters that will eventually burst. The hospital would clean and dress the wounds and provide burn cream which would accelerate healing, prevent infection, and minimize scarring. All of this is covered under workman's comp., unless you're being paid under the table. Of course, Mr. Shekelstein wouldn't want you to cause his insurance to increase, so:
>Don't fucking waste their time with that shit. Take some time off to heal up

[Anonymous No.11429416]

I stabberd my leg with a serrated knife

[Anonymous No.11429515]

>>11429042
>>11429189
Most importantly, it keeps people from seeing your gross and fucked up arm. You look like a fucking leper with AIDS.

P.S. https://www.aafp.org/afp/2000/1101/p2029.html
>Cover the burn with a nonstick dressing (for example, Telfa) and hold it in place with gauze or tape.

[Anonymous No.11429568]

>>11428217

Must be nice to be born into a cushy life.

[Anonymous No.11429604]

>>11427911
yeah, a pancake. only fat ass yanks call them bulky shits pancakes

[Anonymous No.11429624]

>>11429057
thats not the belly of a female, thats for sure

[Anonymous No.11429646]

>>11427860
Random burns here and there, they always heal up. A stupid one was putting some frozen shit that still had a couple ice crystals on it into some hot oil and it spatterd on me giving me a little scar on my chest.
The worst was when running an oven at a really high temp then pulling stuff out from the top rack then pulling stuff from the bottom rack but the top rack got stuck and I nailed my forearm on the hot rack. That shit bubbled up my skin and took like three months to heal completely. It was all red and bubbly, a guy I worked for saw that and was like WTF dude? It all healed up, I don't see any bit of that wound, the memory is there and knowledge of what not to do again.

[Anonymous No.11429649]

>>11427926
It's a broth.

[Anonymous No.11429656]

>>11427860
not much, i once cut my own hand off but put it back but that was a scare. apart from that just the usual burns and stuff

[Anonymous No.11429681]

>>11429656
>cut my own hand off but put it back
story time

[Anonymous No.11429711]

>>11429656
What are you, a salamander?

[Anonymous No.11429805]

>>11429656
Wtf does it still work fine?

[Anonymous No.11429942]

>>11428336
no it's one of [s4s]'s namefig's >>>/s4s/7287571

>>11429646
3 months? damn. The worst burn I ever had took maybe a month before it was just a scar.

[Anonymous No.11430589]

>>11428294
Working the stove next to the idiot working the wok. He knows it a lot less than I do, but they hired him for busy times. This pic was maybe an hour after it happened. He necklaced the oil in a wok and left it on for a while, then tossed in his proteins from the left side with me to his immediate right. I forget the name, but there's the effect in which a pan is heated enough to have any liquid floating above the surface. This was 2 weeks ago, this pic is today.
>>11428308
I shouldn't have to respond to this level of retardation, but here we go. It was bandaged both before and after the pic.
>>11428470
Don't worry, the biggest ones popped while I was home.

[Anonymous No.11431124]

>>11430589
>I forget the name, but there's the effect in which a pan is heated enough to have any liquid floating above the surface

[Anonymous No.11431171]

>>11431124
I think he means the Leidenfrost effect, where a surface is hot enough that a given liquid ends up hovering on a pocket of vapor instead of remaining in contact with surface.

For water and most pans that's like ~250-300 Celsius.

[Anonymous No.11431187]

>>11430589
I didn't read anything in this post or this thread, but it looks like you were laying in bed for 2 weeks straight, walked out your front door only to realize your legs weren't working, fell on the concrete and scraped your knee on the concrete, and then laid in bed for another 2 weeks without cleaning the "wound" and it's now infected and covered in bed sores. The same thing would probably happen to me if I weren't an alcoholic.

[Anonymous No.11431195]

>>11427860
Peeling a potato can suddenly become peeling your index finger if you're an idiot.
An hour and a quarter cup of salt later, I was able to finish peeling that fucking potato.
>what was the salt for anon?
Salt can be used as a vasoconstrictor, to cause capillaries to close and promote clotting. Google styptic blocks. If you remove a couple millimeters of finger skin though, it will involve small blood vessels and maybe even an arteriole being laid open, so a lot more salt is needed. It does work though, and the pain is quite minimal.

[Anonymous No.11431202]

>>11429042
Burns can be serious despite looking innocuous. Something that big, you should go to the hospital .I'm not a doctor, but in terms of what the ER could possibly do:
1. Recommend a dressing more advanced than vaseline + tefla (silver, honey, alginate, whatever is appropriate for the wound)
2. Give general wound care instructions and tell you what to watch out for
3. Possibly precautionary antibiotics or other advice/medication not directly related to wound care

[Anonymous No.11431213]

>>11430589
WTF are you doing to that burn wound, Jesus. Doesn't look well cared for.
>>11428470 is wrong, what's inside a fresh blister isn't going to be infected pus. You want it to stay closed if at all possible

[Anonymous No.11431218]

>>11431202
you can use ranch dressing in place of all of those. checkmate, big pharma

[Anonymous No.11431222]

>>11430589
Get Aquaphor and antibiotics on that wound, and cover it with Tagaderm dressings. You can leave it on for no more than two days between applications, partly because it breathes. (you will probably have at least half of a 10-pack left over.) A little extra help on that wound will ensure a good outcome.

[Anonymous No.11431225]

>>11427860
using a serrated knife to try and cut open a sealed pack of pastrami, dull point, being 12 at the time I tried to use centrifugal force and pivot the fulcrum, ended up cutting my thumb

[Anonymous No.11431325]

Didn't injure myself but I nearly burnt down the house trying to fry chicken a couple of weeks ago. Thought the oil fire would burn itself out, what with it being half a metre of flame, so I just gawped at it for a good minute or so. Eventually I put a frying pan over it.

[Anonymous No.11431348]

>>11427860
>hot oil on my stomach
i was cooking thick rice noodles in a wok without a shirt on. heated the oil for then plopped down the rice noodles and the oil splashed on me. that left a scar for a while.

[Anonymous No.11431475]

>>11427860
I had tiger stripes down my arm for a year - new kid swung a fry-basket across the aisle without looking or warning.

[Anonymous No.11431496]

Haha look at all these idiots hurting themselves while cooking, I have never once hurt myself while making food, all you have to do is be smart and careful while ordering at the drive thru and you won't get hurt like a dumbass.

[Anonymous No.11431497]

>>11431496
I hope you spill scalding coffee all over your wrinkly old vagina.

[Anonymous No.11431673]

>>11427926
>>11429649

[Anonymous No.11431698]

>>11429036
>her

[Anonymous No.11431700]

>>11431225
>trying to sound studious
You sound like a dumbass

[Anonymous No.11431701]

>>11427860
I'm obese

[Anonymous No.11431705]

>>11431325
>>11431348
Laziness and stupidity

[Anonymous No.11431713]

>>11431673
Define sauce.

[Anonymous No.11431730]

>>11431713
condiment you put on other food as an accompaniment because you think it makes it taste better

[Anonymous No.11432045]

>>11431187
>>11431213
>>11431222
Don't worry, I've been taking good care of it. Wrapping it in gauze, slathering on various prescription creams/gels, and giving it time for air as well. This is a pic a few days after it happened for comparison with the last pic which is current. It healed nicely for the most part, I'm just pissed off at the idiot who did it to me.

[Anonymous No.11432064]

>>11427860
Couple of burns from reaching into the oven and hitting the top while drunk

[Anonymous No.11432964]

>>11427860
I've only ever cut myself with utility knifes, never a kitchen knife.
But I'll be damned if I don't burn myself every fucking time I'm in the damn kitchen. Boiling sugar, molten cast iron, wet towels on hot pans and dishes, you name it I'm i'm always burning myself. Even with hot water.

[Anonymous No.11432981]

>>11427860
Tummy burns from frying spam with no shirt

[Anonymous No.11432998]

>>11431705
Do you honestly think they consider those to be random unavoidable accidents, Corky?

[Anonymous No.11433610]

>>11432998
>Thought the oil fire would burn itself out
and
>i was cooking thick rice noodles in a wok without a shirt on

>Corky
Ever see the episode where the fryer burns their restaurant down?

[Anonymous No.11433660]

>live alone
>buy can of corn with a lid opener
>just need to pull the lid back
>somehow manage to cut my little finger open like a tard
>bleeding everywhere what the fuck how deep is this
>heals in 2 weeks, still have the least manly scar in the world

[Anonymous No.11433678]

got a big burn on my hand from grabbing a pan without a glove while drunk cooking

it's healed and mostly faded, but it's still there a bit

[Anonymous No.11433701]

>>11433678
cooking over a campfire is the only time i've cooked drunk and it likewise resulted in the same injury.

>>11431713
>>>/r/ :^)

>>11431496
>all you have to do is be smart and careful while ordering at the drive thru
lole good post

[Anonymous No.11433835]

>>11427860
Lamb I didn't realize was frozen in the middle into a pan of screaming hot grease bukkaked my face with burns luckily it was an inch away from my right eye or I might be rocking the pirate look right now

[Anonymous No.11433860]

>>11428182
Nice little pass hor o' dourve I'll bet

[Anonymous No.11433983]

>>11431713
its a sauce, its nothing finished with cream/ milk

[Anonymous No.11434078]

Minced up habaneros once then rubbed my eyes like a retard.

[Anonymous No.11434238]

>>11431218
>American medicine

[Anonymous No.11434319]

>>11431673
Cereal with milk in it is a soup thus making the milk a broth

[Anonymous No.11434383]

>>11427860
It happened a bit over a year ago, but I managed to cut a part of my thumb off. Put it back on with a band-aid and now there's hardly even a scar.

[Anonymous No.11434476]

>>11433660
>still have the least manly scar in the world
I sat on the couch on top of some scissors

[Anonymous No.11434486]

>>11434078
I've had that happen hours after cutting habaneros and after multiple hand washings, haha.

[Anonymous No.11434521]

>>11434078
I've got stupid hot sauce, it embeds itself in other things, wiped my mouth, accidentally my dick once. burned for 10 minutes, i wanted to dunk it into milk

[Anonymous No.11434532]

I was making a pancake in the nude and my phone rang. Answered it while leaning against my stove. I bolted upright when I heard a sizzle.

I still have a scar on my ass.

[Anonymous No.11434585]

You fucks, that are cooking without clothes on, deserve everything that happens to you.

[Anonymous No.11434636]

>>11427867
post dick, you faggot

[Anonymous No.11435119]

>>11434532
>tfw manlets can't even accurately judge height above 6'
cope harder, /ck/ isn't that dumb

[Anonymous No.11435122]

>>11427981
How does one electrocute in a kitchen?

[Anonymous No.11435892]

>>11427981
>>11435122
Dick in the toaster, immersion blender in the ass.

[Anonymous No.11435899]

>>11431195
Next time use sugar so you’re not screaming bloody murder.
Salt is a retarded and frankly sadistic thing to do to yourself after cutting yourself

[Anonymous No.11437101]

>>11427860
Two weeks ago I was insufficiently cautious while draining a stock pot of excess oil while browning meat and splattered my neck and chin with boiling oil. I hadn’t shaved in two days which protected my skin mostly and while I scabbed up something fierce it didn’t scar. Be careful with oil kids.

[Anonymous No.11437133]

The stuff in this thread is funny on one hand and not on another, I hope we all remember this as lessons to not repeat. I've gotten serious burns before but those didn't hurt, they took time to heal. What hurts are stupid little paper cuts from knives not enough to draw blood, but enough so the nerve endings start fucking with me, little ones like that can be damn annoying.

[Anonymous No.11437144]

>>11437101
Yeah it's a good reason to not fry foods in hot oil wearing just underwear. I learned that the hard way.

[Anonymous No.11437149]

>>11437133
i'm just here because OP's image is ripa's meme

[Anonymous No.11437181]

>>11435122
Not that guy, but I've gotten some pretty nasty shocks from faulty dishwashing machines.

[Anonymous No.11437196]

>>11437181
I got one of those from a 22 volt battery when I was a little kid. I was like the 9 volt ones are no big deal so why not try a 22 volt one? They're the same size but the positive and negative are on opposite sides of the battery instead of next to each other. I connected a couple leads then put them each on my tounge and fuck, that shit was bizarre, it sizzled a bit, it was audable. Another thing to not repeat.

[Anonymous No.11437203]

>>11437196
"That which does not kill us makes us stronger"

[Anonymous No.11437326]

>>11437196
one wonders where one's parents were at said time

[Anonymous No.11437357]

>>11437196
I read this, then let what happened sink in, and then reread it with a lisp since that's how i imagine you talk after that.

[Anonymous No.11437421]

Cut my left index finger several times. Deep cut in thumb that need stiches. Uncountable burns.

[Anonymous No.11437437]

>>11428035
Homos are the worst

[Anonymous No.11438651]

>>11427860
I cut the living fuck out of my finger and messed up a nerve in the process. Now it feels like I'm getting rubbing alcohol in a small cut every so often on my finger.

[Anonymous No.11438654]

>>11428130
Try a lifetime

[Anonymous No.11438669]

>>11429656
https://youtu.be/v4nLrDtwBcs

[Anonymous No.11438678]

Tomato slicer and thumb. Rude ass boss would teach everyone to not use the hand guard it came with, and wouldn't buy gloves for it. Everyone would slice their thumb once and then refuse to use it.

[Anonymous No.11438742]

>>11428157
You say that like it's a bad thing.

[Anonymous No.11440226]

>>11427860
i often cut my fingers when im doing some drunk cooking

[Anonymous No.11440293]

>>11437357
No lisp but it's pretty funny looking back on the stupid stuff friends and I not only did but got away with when we were little kids.