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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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11362229 No.11362229 [Reply] [Original]

Are there any Jewish dishes that aren’t fucking disgusting?

>> No.11362234
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11362234

lox
bagels
rye bread
also they make a kickass beef stew

>> No.11362235

All the good ones were stolen from Polish/Eastern European cuisine.

>> No.11362241

>>11362234
those are ingredients of dishes and don’t count you fuckwink.

>> No.11362247

>>11362229
Nope.

There's a reason why, well, you know.

>> No.11362253 [DELETED] 

>>11362229
Jews have no sense of taste

>> No.11362269

>>11362229
matzo ball soup?
latkes?
corned beef & pastrami?

>> No.11362274

>>11362229
Not really.

>> No.11362280

>>11362234
>bagels
>bread with the center stolen
Yup thats jewish all right

>> No.11362293

>>11362229
Personally I like

Blintzes, Latkes, Salt beef sandwiches, Albert Einstein, Marcus Goldman, Lawrence Summers, Kenneth Arrow.

And dislike

Knishes, Bagels with lox and cream cheese, Lox, Matzo ball soup, George Soros, Karl Marx, Herbert Marcuse, Paul Wolfowitz.

>> No.11362314 [DELETED] 
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11362314

Npc antisemites so mad

>> No.11362339 [DELETED] 
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11362339

>>11362314
What a shitty edit you've got there, lmao

Given the original premise of the joke, a more appropriate kike-themed redux might be:
>Antisemite huh?
>You must secretly want to fuck Jews

>> No.11362348

>>11362229
Matzoh. Not the shit you can buy in stores before Passover, because for some reason I don't know that stuff always tastes stale. Home made matzoh is both the easiest dish in the world (water + flower + salt), and delicious. It's basically really high quality crackers.

>> No.11362349

>>11362229
Is brisket jewish, or do jews just eat a lot of it?

Pastrami is good, but that was only marketed first by a jew that bought the recipe from someone else.

>> No.11362353

>>11362241
>stew is an ingredient

>> No.11362355

>>11362241
>beef stew is an ingredient, not a dish
wat?

>> No.11362359

>>11362229
Big Jew Tiddies

>> No.11362365

>>11362359
The proper yiddish term is "Jewbs".

>> No.11362373

Hamentaschen is fucking incredible.

>> No.11362384

>>11362229
Shakshouka (however the fuck its spelled, goddamn yids) isn't terrible. Makes a decent breakfast when served with toast.

>> No.11362394 [DELETED] 

>>11362339
wew, you posted it so fast, I guess your anus must be pretty sore

>> No.11362401

You know what's funny. I get vegan, GF, peanut allergy, even Halal requests, but I never had a Kosher request. I know Kosher is very complicated so Jewish people probably don't just go to ANY restaurant.

Where do these people dine?

>> No.11362407 [DELETED] 
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11362407

>>11362339
I edited the joke that way it is actualy funny and reflects real life reactions of antisemite NPCs, so get fucked, bruh

>> No.11362417

>>11362401
Check the packaging on your ingredients. A fuckton of stuff is Kosher and you wouldn't even know it.

>> No.11362423 [DELETED] 
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11362423

>>11362417
Even the president of the u*a!

>> No.11362433

>>11362417

my point was that I never even heard for a request for Kosher, like with GF or vegan

>> No.11362445
File: 193 KB, 599x414, Netanyahu-shoe-dinner-may-2018-instagram.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
11362445

these are the chocolates you eat in jerusalem

>> No.11362450

rugelach, sufganiya, babka, bourekas

bourekas for main entree and babka for dessert is the best possible meal

t. jew

>> No.11362466
File: 2.83 MB, 3548x2592, Matzo.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
11362466

>>11362229
Kugel
lox n bagels

>> No.11362470

>>11362365
that's a big 10-4 good buddy

>> No.11362488

My god everything is so damn starchy

>> No.11362501

>>11362401
>>11362433

If you're serious about kosher then you're gonna go out of your way to look for kosher certified restaurants and markets

>> No.11362528

>>11362401
>>11362433
Ummm Anon, where do I submit my GF request?????

>> No.11362541

>>11362501

Yeah that's what I mean.

Why can't vegans and GF eaters also go out of their way to find establishments that cater to them.

>>11362528

In the off chance that you're serious, GF is gluten free, but you probably know that.

>> No.11362575
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11362575

>>11362423
Russian conspiracy!

>> No.11362584

>>11362541
>In the off chance that you're serious, GF is gluten free, but you probably know that.
Oh I'm very serious, I'm looking for a long-term relationship - maybe even marriage if it feels right. The GF of my dreams isn't gluten free, but I think I could make do. Are you going to introduce me?

>> No.11362585

infant children must taste great the way jews go through them, or maybe it's just the dicks.

>> No.11362606

>>11362401
Culturally Jewish people only care about 4 things (unless it's Passover), pork, shellfish, blood, and meat/milk and it's pretty easy to tell if that stuff is in a dish

>> No.11362610

>>11362247
Tell me what us jews know

>> No.11362625

>>11362407
moron

>> No.11362629
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11362629

>>11362407
>I edited the joke that way it is actualy funny

>> No.11362646

>>11362606

>Culturally Jewish
>Pretty easy to tell if that stuff is in a dish

I'm talking about actual Kosher. And real kosher is not simply a matter of omitting non Kosher ingredients.

http://www.jewfaq.org/m/kashrut.htm

I used to do corporate catering that primarily served Orthodox Jews. I would not be comfortable serving Kosher (even with Kosher slaughtered meats) in a regular kitchen.

On the other hand, preparing Halal is much easier for me provided that I have Halal slaughtered meat.

>> No.11362663 [DELETED] 

>>11362575
>he is also a jew
who cares?

didnt cheeto elvis say how much he hates globalism but loves globalist jews? realy makes you go hmmmmmmm

>>11362625
buttblasted

>> No.11362679

>>11362646
there are not many orthodox jews in america and any there are live in New York so it's kind of pointless to bring up strict kosher practices in a general discussion about kosher laws. They don't even eat cauliflower because it could have bugs in the folds. You're lucky if you even meet jews that smash their plates every year, much less a Hasid

>> No.11362682

>>11362646
real kosher is insane. one of my chefs ran a bagel place for a while that did the best new york style bagels in northern california; when his restaurant closed, he sold the recipe to a bakery owned by an orthodox jew, and was hired to adapt it to kosher rules; it was already a complex, chemistry-heavy recipe to begin with, and he said it was almost impossible to execute to his standards with the addition of the equipment and timing restrictions from kosher. and we're just talking about a classic bagel recipe.

>> No.11362702
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11362702

>lox

>> No.11362938

>>11362247
>There's a reason why, well, you know.
No, do tell.

>> No.11362941

>>11362702
when will they bring it back bro, even though the latest episodes werent as funny, it wasn't bad like south park and family guy. peole just dont understand the fucking humor

>> No.11362944
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11362944

Hey everyone,

please don't buy kosher products, don't buy from (((them))).

Thanks for making the world a better place!

:)

>> No.11362960

>>11362682
Shabbos rules are nuts too. I used to help out my neighbors by turning on their lights and they couldn't pay me for it directly so they occasionally gave me Cubs tickets and way overpaid me for babysitting

Then they moved into a house they built which had two kitchens to make sure meat and milk never came into contact with each other. Crazy bastards I tell ya

>> No.11362973
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11362973

>ctrl+F
>challah
>0 results

The fuck is wrong with you people?

>> No.11362980

>>11362973
stolen from the French, German or Poles, "challah" is simply not "jewish" at all. It is a regular bread everyone in Europe has made before the kikes and better too...

There are no "jewish recipes". Everything (((they))) claim was stolen or appropriated from their host cultures. Fucking kike parasites

>> No.11362984

>>11362234
>lox
Scandinavian
>bagels
Viennese invention
>rye bread
Literally every Central and Eastern European country has that

>> No.11362997

>>11362980
>stolen from the French, German or Poles

And what they all simultaneously invented bread and didn't steal it from somewhere else?

>> No.11363006
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11363006

>>11362997
France, Germany and Poland simply don't go around claiming it is theirs!

>> No.11363015

>>11363006
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_breads

Except they all have

>> No.11363028

>>11362944
Not all kosher things are made buy / at all connected to Jewish people. It just means they're allowed to eat it, if a brand includes "kosher" on their packaging it's just marketing like "gluten free".

>> No.11363033

How jewish are reubens, on a scale of the US senate to a NYC dollar sale?

>> No.11363050

>>11362679

Well that would be the reason why I never have "kosher" requests, because it's nearly impossible to execute.

Gluten free is also technically non executable in any kitchen that handles flour, because of the possibility of cross contamination with "airborne gluten."

https://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/2018/04/03/598990638/when-going-gluten-free-is-not-enough-new-tests-detect-hidden-exposure

>When Thompson reported the study on her Facebook page, which has over 17,000 followers, worried comments spooled out, ranging from concerns about airborne gluten from the bakery section of supermarkets

At least strict observing Jews don't go demanding for accommodations in restaurants.

>> No.11363112

>>11362229
Carciofi alla giudia. Even though the rabbi of Milan argued that the high risk of tiny parasiteshiding in the artichoke's leaves made it non-kosher, ironically enough.

>> No.11363284

>>11362234
lox is basically just yiddish for salmon

>> No.11363321

Jews will swarm this thread posting anything they can think of to try and claim it as their own.
They are tasteless non-humans and have never been able to create their own dishes.

>> No.11363409

>>11362229
ridiculous question, ottolenghi is a hyped cook for a reason

>> No.11363607

>>11363015
n-no they don't you stupid k-kike

>> No.11363768

>>11362606
Man, Culturally Jewish people don't even care about that shit. A large majority of Jews don't keep kosher. It's too much work and we really just don't care enough. There are small enclaves of Jews that care, but they go to restaurants owned by other Jews who care, so it's all good.

>> No.11363804

Knishes are delishes

>> No.11363822

>>11363321
THIS

>> No.11363827

>>11363768
If they "keep kosher" that is what they pay attention to. Also no corn during Passover

>> No.11363837

>>11362980
A lot of Shabbat-related foods are original

>> No.11363843
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11363843

>>11362610
that we are set for life

>> No.11363859

>>11362229
Lox
The biggest contribution Jews have made to food and cooking is inadvertently creating soul food
If you say why you might get banned though

>> No.11363931

>>11362938
>No, do tell.
Oh....you know.

>> No.11363935

>>11363931
No, would you kindly explain?

>> No.11363966

>>11363837
no they're not, kike

>> No.11364549
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11364549

>>11363321
/thread

>> No.11365275

>>11363837
>Kike on full defense
Jews just steal dishes from whichever country they happen to be a parasite in.

>> No.11365598

>>11362229
>Are there any Jew....
Stopped reading there.

>> No.11365605

>>11365275
Sounds like every other culture literally ever. This is obviously just a /pol/ddit "le jews xD" thread, but if you seriously take a look at the evolution of cuisines across the world you'll notice a trend of adopting and just plain theft.

>> No.11365992
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11365992

>>11365605
Lol, we know we're just joshin'. Now, to show we're all friends get up next to my pizza oven door and help stoke it, heh, heh.

>> No.11366003
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11366003

>>11365605

>> No.11367113

>>11364549
>>11363822

this shit is on the same level as flat-earthers and anti-vaxx people lmao

>> No.11367153
File: 189 KB, 1600x900, charoset.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
11367153

My favorite holiday dish is charoset. It's not traditional, but I like to mix diced plum in with the apple.

>> No.11367164

>>11362610
U don't already know what you know?

>> No.11367172

>>11362241
>autism

>> No.11367174

>>11362466
Noodle Kugel is pretty good, but Potato Kugel is gross.

>> No.11367175

>>11362445
Looks like an absolute rip off.

>> No.11367177

>>11362417
The only thing that makes something kosher is the fact that a rabbi yodeled over it. Personally I think we should outlaw kosher certification. It's a goddamn scam.

>> No.11367179

>>11363859
>The biggest contribution Jews have made to food and cooking is inadvertently creating soul food
ebin

>> No.11367180

>>11362353
It is in pot pie. It also isn't exactly unique.

>> No.11367187

>>11364549
They did invent usury, anon. At least give them credit for that.

>> No.11367189
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11367189

>>11367174
Potato kugel is 100x better than noodle kugel when it's homemade.

>> No.11367196

>>11362944
Good luck avoiding it. When I found out what the kosher certs looked like and went to the grocery store for the first time afterwards it was like putting on those glasses from "They Live".

>> No.11367205

>>11367189
I had a Jew friend that ran a catering company. They made their stuff from scratch. Now I haven't had either in about 20 years, but that's what my memory tells me.

>> No.11367210

>>11367153
Not sure if that's a pudding or cat food. What's in it?

>> No.11367214

>>11367196
>Implying those certifications mean anything
Oftentimes a rabbi drives to the facility, puts one leg out to sign the form, and drives out. It's so fucking cheap to stamp kosher on shit and sell to them people do it. They shill to their own.

>> No.11367224

>>11362941
>when will they bring it back bro
I kind of hope they don't. I really lost interest in it after the Boost Mobile episode.

>> No.11367227

>>11363028
It means a kosher certification organization collected a tax from the product.

>> No.11367229

>>11367210
Traditionally it's made with only chopped walnuts, diced apple, red wine. Like an alcoholic fruit salad.

>> No.11367232

>>11362941
It's played out. That episode where the dog kept raping the fat hairy dude was hilarious tho.

>> No.11367239

>>11362234
You have to admit that rye bread is the worst bread. The French and Vietnamese beat everyone at bread. Yes, even the Romans.

>> No.11367241

>>11367229
You guys should steal some better desserts.

>> No.11367257

>>11362229
Welp, I guess we're done here. Jews: go steal some desserts from the Italians. You can thank me later. And quit eating that pickled fish shit. There's no need to punish yourself like some sort of cucked Swede.

>> No.11367359

I'll try two of these ITT. Thanx Jewish ppl.

>> No.11367485

>>11367113
Not an argument, shlomo

>> No.11367732
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11367732

>>11362229
Roasted duck/goose with šoulet (pearl barley with basically any legumes, marjoram and shitload of garlic). I don’t know how to translate it.

>> No.11367890

No because all of our cuisine is cuisine of wherever the particular jew family settled in + kosherifying changes.
t. israeli kyke

>> No.11367920

>>11364549
fuck off jew licker

>> No.11368068

Jachnun is a dish made mostly by yemenite Jews. It's a flaky butter roll usually eaten at breakfast with a side of grated tomatoes. Probably one of my favorite foods. It's worth checking out. Also Lahooh (לחוח) is a spongy bread that's great with spicy food, hummus, and tahini.

>> No.11368074

>>11362445
>he put a shoe on Netanyahu's plate
>got away with it and got out of the country alive by pretending he "didn't know"

absolute madman