/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.11255699]

I've never been to a bar and I genuinely don't understand how they work. If I walk up to the bartender and say "1 beer please", will he just give me some random brand of beer, or will he ask me what kind of beer? In movies you always see people paying bartenders in cash for their drinks (without even asking the price). Are you just supposed to know exactly how much each drink costs? And are the prices always easy amounts, like $5, so they don't have to make change?

[Anonymous No.11255710]

>>11255699
I am gay.

[Anonymous No.11255711]

>>11255699
Also I never talked to people outside my home before. Are you supposed to say "hello" to the bartender or do you just act cool and say "1 beer please"??

[Anonymous No.11255717]

>>11255699
to blend in and seem like a normal person just walk up to the bar and ask for the usual. if they ask what that is or seem confused just repeat yourself until they bring out your usual

[Anonymous No.11255719]

>>11255699
if you want a beer on tap, a lot of bars will have a menu or a chalkboard or something showing what is currently available. if not, you can just look at the tap handles to see what there is. if you want something in a bottle/can, just ask what they have. they will then tell you how much the drink is. you can pay cash right then or give them a credit card to open up a tab. usually the prices are in round number increments so you're only getting bills and possibly quarters back as change. tip $1 per drink at most bars unless it is a really fancy place.

[Anonymous No.11255724]

If this is a bit, it’s great. If not , you actually have a brain disease/disorder.

Bring money for alcohol stupid. Walk up , go I’ll have a bud, coors, strawberry daiquiri whatever the fuck. Then the bartender will hand you your drink and say “that’ll be ‘$X’ thanks” . Then you take your drink and fuck off loser

[Anonymous No.11255725]

yeah they'd ask you what kind of beer, you see people just giving money because they aren't sure how much it costs and the rest is a tip. What I would do is, give me a beer whatever is (darkest, cheapest, lightest, foreign) on tap.

[Anonymous No.11255736]

>>11255724
Also you always have to give the bartender a firm handshake. That always works.

[Anonymous No.11255765]

>>11255699
I like to think that instead of paying the barkeep a cash tip I'm brightening his day with quality conversation.

>>11255736
I bet all the cyclists who are in a hurry really fucking appreciate those cocksuckers.

[Anonymous No.11255797]

behind the bar tender there are beer taps with names of beers on them. You ask the bartender for one of those beers. They also might have a selection of bottled beers under the counter.

[Anonymous No.11255827]

1. Approach bar
2. Attract barkeeps attention
3. Ask about popular beers/ales/ciders/alco-pops/spirits.
4. Choose.
5. Acquire alcohol sceptical.
6. Pay the man
7. Drink.
8. Repeat steps 1-7 until you're asleep.

[Anonymous No.11255859]

Just act casual and say in a low voice 'can I have a pint of Guiness and a straw, please', look the barkeep straight in the eye for a second or two. Enjoy your beer, anon.

[Anonymous No.11255862]

>>11255827
>Attract barkeeps attention
Thats just a sign the bartender isn't paying attention. If you walk up to a bar and sit down in an empty seat, barkeep should come to you within a reasonable amount of time. If they're making drinks or attending other customers, its almost a standard that they should look at you and acknowledge your existence and say something along the lines of "I'll be with you in a minute".

Look for specials somewhere, either a drink menu nearby, sometimes shits written on the wall or near the drinks selection, or happy hour specials.

Bars are expensive, OP. Expect $5 for a pint if its an "average joe" bar, and if you're at a higher end place or a place that is always busy due to its location (like a hotel) expect to pay $8-10. Double those prices for mixed drinks.

[Anonymous No.11255868]

>>11255765
Nobody likes bicyclists. They use an entire lane, fuck up traffic, and with those cucksticks hanging off the side, motorcycles and other bicyclists can't even get by them.

Most cyclists are just jackasses out for recreation or exercise. How about we leave roads for, wait for it, transportation?

[Anonymous No.11255870]

>>11255699
If you have a gun or a knife, try waving it around a bit to get the barmans attention.

[Anonymous No.11255872]

>>11255862
t. flyover who has never been to a busy bar

[Anonymous No.11255882]

>>11255699
People usually tip (in movies) so theres no change. There's usually the prices visible somewhere.

[Anonymous No.11255950]

>>11255868
yeah, how about we leave roads for, wait for it, transportation?

[Anonymous No.11255962]

>>11255699
"beer": miller, bud, etc.
"cheap beer": pbr, rolling rock, etc.
"your best beer": usually blue moon if they don't have much selection, otherwise craft

[Anonymous No.11255979]

>>11255699
nervously glance around and order the first brand you recognize as quickly as possible so everyone stops watching you

[Anonymous No.11255991]

>>11255699
You get a $20 and fold it casually longways. Then go lean on the bar, crossing one of your legs up so your toes are the only part of your shoe touching the ground. Then you make eye contact with the ‘tender and gently tap your 20 at them while giving an occasional wink and click of the tongue. When they come over you say “been a tough day, wife on my ass, kids raising hell.”

[Anonymous No.11256004]

You walk in, shout "my round", and slap down a wad of cash. When the bartender's done, you say "and one for yourself".

[Anonymous No.11256093]

>>11255699
I only turned 21 this year but I still haven't been to a bar for this same reason. I'm a social autist so I just get nervous about this kind of shit. I'm sure I just have to go once and it'll all calm down and be easy but going to a bar alone seems like a waste too.

[Anonymous No.11256104]

>go into bar
>squint at pumps if I don't know what I want already
>if I'm stumped ask if they've got owt good in
>pay with card if i can, cash if I can't
>if I'm with mates we typically do rounds for convenience
>chat with barman usually develops if I'm on my own and it's quiet
simple as

[Anonymous No.11256133]

Lmao I worry about the same things. People in movies and on TV start to act really weird at bars which makes me not sure what I’m supposed to do. They never just use normal language to describe what they want and there never seems to be a price for anything, I genuinely don’t understand what you’re supposed to do at a bar to get your drink.

What does “on tap” mean? What do all those drink names mean? How do you know how much your drink costs? What’s a tab? Why are bartenders venerated but people that take your order at fast food restaurants looked down on? Am I missing something? Is it just extreme autism?

[Anonymous No.11256147]

>>11256104
>squint at pumps
The fuck are "pumps," is this some kind of gay slang?

[Anonymous No.11256153]

>>11256147
how do they get beer out of barrels in the cellar in your country, suck really hard?

[Anonymous No.11256154]

>>11256133
On tap means they have a barrel with a tap in it. This is as opposed to just a bottle of the brew, which doesn't taste as good.
There are different genres of beer, in the same way that white and red wine are different. The only way to know which you'll like is to try them.
Bars have prices, but honestly if you're looking at them that hard you're not doing it right. Either the bar focuses on cheap beer and has really obvious specials or it's focused on craft beers and you're gonna spend $20 on a couple of them.
A tab is a running debt. You give the bartender your card at the start of the night, and they wait to swipe it at the end of your time there.
How exactly the bartender came to be venerated, I couldn't tell you, but I know that at the nice places, when it's slow and quiet, they're good listeners and that's at least part of the equation.

[Anonymous No.11256163]

>>11256154
How does the bartender know how many drinks you’ve had over the course of a night? How does he even know who you are?

[Anonymous No.11256165]

just dont drink
thats literally the better option

[Anonymous No.11256176]

>>11256163
Either they know you personally or you tell them your name every time you get another drink

[Anonymous No.11256181]

>>11256176
I usually wear a name tag.
It helps with my condition as well.

[Anonymous No.11256183]

>>11255719
>tip $1 per drink
That's a Y*kes from me

[Anonymous No.11256187]

>>11256183
This, I definitely tip more than that

[Anonymous No.11256190]

>>11256187
Don't tip, you fucking American

[Anonymous No.11256193]

>>11256183
>>11256187
>tipping per drink and not at the end of the night

[Anonymous No.11256205]

>>11256193
If you do running tips there's a chance the barkeep will give you some of the drinks free, cheap, or with extra boose in them because he likes you.
If you tip at the end he'll go the whole night assuming you don't tip at all.

I live in a non-tipping country but even I could figure that out.

[Anonymous No.11256210]

>>11256205
everybody tips at the end of the night m8

[Anonymous No.11256212]

>>11256193
You tip throughout the night at a busy bar so you keep getting service.

[Anonymous No.11256214]

>>11256205
I am an attractive person I don't have to bribe my bar tenders

[Anonymous No.11256216]

>>11256214
I'm friends with my bartenders, I don't have to be attractive

[Anonymous No.11256238]

>>11255868
I use my bike entirely for transportation. I may be poor but I can stay lean and don’t have to pay for gas. Pretty sweet

[Anonymous No.11256250]

>>11255991
Kek

[Anonymous No.11256262]

>>11255699
I've never been ashamed to ask what's on tap or just ask for what they recommend if I don't recognize anything

I live in a big beer town though, so your mileage may vary

[Anonymous No.11256912]

>>11256093
Been to the bar a few times. It's a waste of time most places. Only reason to go is to a nice place with the ol lady. Gotta wait for the tender. People around you are next to worthless, beers more expensive than at home. The only redeeming quality is the food is almost always pretty dam good. I go in, order to go, and have a Miller draft while I wait for it to be ready.

[Anonymous No.11256928]

>>11255699
you walk up to the bar and say
>"hey, nigger...give me a jigger"

[Anonymous No.11256948]

>>11255699
You could try a gaybar first. No problem with the birds there, guys are friendly and will probably buy you a few beers/drinks.

[Anonymous No.11256950]

>bars sucks
>they're expensive
>you don't wanna converse with strangers at them

The only time you should go is when a band you like is playing or something, otherwise they're a waste of time and money.

[Anonymous No.11256972]

Come to England where the bar scene is easy.

You go to the bar, order a drink, pay for it and don't have to worry about a tip.

[Anonymous No.11256973]

>>11255868
>Most cyclists are just jackasses out for recreation or exercise.
you're an insane person

[Anonymous No.11256979]

>>11256153
they're "taps" in english

[Anonymous No.11256998]

>>11256979
they call them pumps because traditional ales are pumped put of the barrel manually with these pumps
macro lagers are on tap like usual

[Anonymous No.11257042]

>>11255699
I sometimes have trouble in the supermarket too btw

[Anonymous No.11257055]

>>11256133
How is it possible to actually be this fucking stupid.

[Anonymous No.11257065]

>>11256973
What’s really funny is he thinks people doing things for recreation and exercise are bad people. Lmao.

[Anonymous No.11257069]

>>11256998
Is there any benefit to this or is it just tradition? From all I've heard manually pumping kegs is a pretty shitty way to go about it.

[Anonymous No.11257079]

>>11255699
>If I walk up to the bartender and say "1 beer please", will he just give me some random brand of beer, or will he ask me what kind of beer?
Depends on the bar. If you're in your typical large bar or pub in the US, UK or Australia they'll likely have 3 to 30 beers on tap so you'll have to specify what you want. If you're not sure what you should get, just ask "What's on special?" or ask for the bartender's recommendation. Just say you're new in town or whatever.
>In movies you always see people paying bartenders in cash for their drinks (without even asking the price).
Again depends on the bar. Some expect money up front (paying for each drink as you order), some just make a tab like you're at a restaurant and you pay when you're ready to leave. I pay by cash so I don't go full retard.
>Are you just supposed to know exactly how much each drink costs?
You know menus are a thing, right? They'll usually have big signs everywhere too advertising their specialty cocktails or beers on special.

>And are the prices always easy amounts, like $5.
Yea generally, in my bar our pricing is basically
$4 for the monthly special
$5 for highballs, wine
$6 for beer
$7 for cocktails

If you're in the US or Canada you'll have to worry about tipping too. That's it's whole own can of worms.

[Anonymous No.11257094]

>>11256163
>How does a guy who's given me all my drinks and watched me get drunk over the course of 5 or 6 hours know how many drinks I've had over the course of the night?

[Anonymous No.11257237]

>>11255699
>walk up to the bartender and say "1 beer please"
They do this in movies a lot, but I don't think people actually do it.

[Anonymous No.11257305]

>>11257069
I think beer engines give you a little more control over the pour compared to a pump, and they're visual evidence that it's not pressurised, but it's largely a trend.

[Anonymous No.11257596]

>>11257094
Well let’s say 50 people go up to get drinks over the course of the night, you think he’d remember that many different people?

[Anonymous No.11257618]

>>11255699
Not sure if bait or pure autism.

[Anonymous No.11257640]

>>11255699
Order a bottle of Triple Sec and proceed to drink it as fast as possible, preferably while maintaining eye contact with a potential mate.

[Anonymous No.11257663]

>>11257055
To be fair I’ve never gone to a bar even though ive been legal for a year. I just go to the liquor store and OP probably does too

[Anonymous No.11257666]

>>11255736
the ol' firm shake in the eye

[Anonymous No.11258293]

>>11255736
>>11255765
I want to say I've been cycling longer than any of them, and I hate this shit.

I'm not going to say they're all like this, but the ones pushing for some 1.5m distance that isn't built in to the road, and riding three abreast while casually chatting is never approprite.

Pair riding when both of those people are actually paying attention to what they're doing is fine, two people on a tight busy road having a chat deserve to be hit

[Anonymous No.11258298]

>>11257663
OP here. 23 years old and I don't drink.

[Anonymous No.11258301]

>>11255868
>They use an entire lane
Glad this isn't a thing in my country.
>How about we leave roads for, wait for it, transportation?
Sir, many people use their bikes for transportation over sport

[Anonymous No.11258303]

>>11257069
Yeah, from my experience its just a cute thing they can do. Theres no reason to use a pump over a tap beyond marketing