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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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11226301 No.11226301 [Reply] [Original]

If I want to fuck a bitch what do I cook her?

>> No.11226306

>>11226301
Take her to Denny's and fuck a waiter.

>> No.11226309

Applebee’s is the best place if you want a gay experience.

>> No.11226320

>>11226309
I am gay by the way

>> No.11226319

>>11226301
Kibbles and Bits

>> No.11226322

>>11226309
last time i went my server was really smug and british

>> No.11226340

>>11226322
You missed your gay experience.

>> No.11226380

>>11226301
Who is this cutiepie?

>> No.11226384

chicken piccata (chicken prick)

>> No.11226405

>>11226301
for you?

rohypnol.

>> No.11227037

>>11226301
First, change your attitude about women.

They are not "bitches" you "fuck"

She is your partner.

>> No.11227067

>>11227037
t. roastie

>> No.11227073

>>11226380


>>11226380
Not op, but Oshima Yuko. Ex AKB48 member.

>> No.11227393

>>11226301
Just make sure it's nothing gassy, the last thing you need is her farting and shitting up a storm when you are railing her.

>> No.11227417
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11227417

>>11227067
sounds more like a jordan p*ters*n disciple trying, unsuccessfully, to satirize how non-incels talk, based entirely on memes because he has no experience talking to normies

>> No.11227418

>>11227037
Fucking incels I swear.

>> No.11227428

>>11226301
dog food

>> No.11227439

i made chicken cordon bleu for the last woman i successfully bedded, but like a fancy version with high quality ham and cheese, deep fried on the stove in a dutch oven

>> No.11227450

>>11227417
Imagine being such a mysoginist who doesn't get why women don't like him. God, incels and jp followers are so hilarious.

>> No.11227479
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11227479

>>11227393
But farts are my fetish

>> No.11227620

>>11226301
>didi mou! didi mou!

>> No.11227684

>>11226301
cook that bitch some spaghetti carbonara. bitches love spaghetti carbonara.

>> No.11227694

>>11227393
>give her something gassy
>would be allowed to be a terrible lay because she would be the self-conscious one
you're a genius

>> No.11227713

>>11227684
can confirm

>> No.11227806

>>11226301
Shrimps and prime rib

>> No.11227927

feed that bitch your dick

>> No.11227931

>>11226301
step one: cut hole in pizzabox

>> No.11227947

>>11226306
/thread

>> No.11227955

>>11227684
confirmed, am bitch

>> No.11228168

>>11226301
salmon with a side of asparagus or green beans. also get a nice loaf of bread or do some kind of risotto or wild rice. all of these things are difficult to fuck up but come together to make a nice meal.

>> No.11228255

Saute some diced onion on medium-low or medium until softish, then throw in some sliced and peeled zucchini. When the zucchini is soft, throw some minced garlic until fragrant. Then throw in some diced tomato. On the side, cook some gnocchi or short pasta. While that's cooking, put a little bit of the pasta water in with your veggie sauce. When the gnocchi is done, scoop it all up and put it in the sauce. It should be a little bit thick but not too much. Toss it all together.

It's easy and it seems fancy as fuck. It'll make you seem more interesting and more attractive than you really are.

>> No.11229864

italian food gets bitches

>> No.11229897

>>11228168
asparagus is bad because the pee will smell weird
beans will give you the braps

>> No.11229960

Osso buco

>> No.11230856

linguinile with clams

>> No.11230948

>>11228255
DON'T do it it makes mustard gas

>> No.11231440

>>11226301
pour 1 cup mustard into a bowl and microwave for 10 minutes

>> No.11231466

A romantic salad. Don't waste gas until you know she puts out.

>> No.11231497

>>11226301
>If I want to fuck a bitch what do I cook her?
I recommend fucking her as much as possible before cooking her. They're really only good for one go after that. Reheated is terrible. Cold is even worse.

>> No.11231506

anything as long as its laced with roofies

>> No.11231629

>>11226309
I haven't been to Applebees in years, but I went a few times this past month with friends, and 2/3 times our waiters were gay.

>> No.11231879

>>11226301
Nothing. Go out for drinks instead. Cooking for a girl at home makes you look kinda femmy unless you're a
Lready uber chad, and no one really wants to fuck immediately after a large meal. If you must cook, make pancakes. With orange juice coffee/tea and bacon maybe.

>> No.11231893

>>11229864
Pizza would probably be the best bet. Everyone likes pizza, it's fucking easy to make as long as you can prep and it's not hard to make pizza better than you can buy.

>> No.11231901

>>11228255
This is the best recommendation here.
It's going to taste great and gnocchi/pasta is an effective feel-good ingredient that leads to wanting sex, in addition to everything he said.