/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.11126089]

>Hey bud, what can I get you?

[Anonymous No.11126093]

>>11126089
an Americano

[Anonymous No.11126097]

A cortado to go

[Anonymous No.11126099]

"Sup. Could I have one regular cappuccino with almond milk, no chocolate or cinnamon, thanks vro"

[Anonymous No.11126101]

>>11126089
a steamy black cuban with extra cream ;)

[Anonymous No.11126102]

>>11126089
one latte with almond milk

[Anonymous No.11126103]

>>11126089
Cafe espresso por favorrrr

[Anonymous No.11126104]

>>11126099
I'd like to imagine that after hours of perfectly shaving his chest, he got to his pubes and said, "Fuck it, I'm done for today."

[Anonymous No.11126106]

>>11126104
His chest isn't even shaved.

[Anonymous No.11126111]

>drinking the caffeinated jew

It's 2018 man

[Anonymous No.11126115]

>>11126106
It was, probably a week before the picture was taken.

It's impossible that his chest and stomach hair is naturally that short compared to his facial hair. And it also looks like he shaved his arm hair, and possible armpits.

This is a weird, weird photo.

[Anonymous No.11126123]

Low fat cappuccino and a croissant.

Or a nontraditional iced Americano.

[Anonymous No.11126124]

>>11126089
Good morning, I'll have have a coffee with milk and sugar to go please

[Anonymous No.11126157]

>>11126124
Sorry bud, your gonna have to tell me what kind of coffee *Turns back to the cute barista girl, shakes his head and they both laugh at you* well what will it be bud? Dont have all day

[Anonymous No.11126166]

>>11126157
I usally have a nigger deal with these autistic situations for me.

[Anonymous No.11126172]

>>11126157
You know what? I thought I was walking into a mom and pop coffee house, but it appears that this is some sort of hipster hangout where the unemployed and neurotic loiter all day. I'll just go to dunkin, thanks

[Anonymous No.11126175]

Large breakfast tea, good luck fucking that up.

[Anonymous No.11126184]

>>11126157
>Not assuming he means drip and asking to clarify
>Possibly kicking off a round of 20 questions while the line builds up
>Willing to risk making an easy customer into a loud and bitchy one

This is how you drive yourself insane working a retail job.

[Anonymous No.11126189]

>>11126089
honey latte, thanks champ

[Anonymous No.11126346]

"Coffee, Black."

[Anonymous No.11126349]

>>11126089

Iced Americano. Black.

[Anonymous No.11126370]

Short black, half a raw sugar. Thank.

[Anonymous No.11126373]

Its hot out here. 12 oz Iced Coffee please.

[Anonymous No.11126402]

>>11126089
Can I get a double cortadito, but made cubano shots? If it's hot, whole or half and half or soy is fine, no need for you to steam some more, but please no almond or skim and god no rice or hemp. Thanks dude.

[Anonymous No.11126409]

I wish I knew what amazing coffee tasted like so I knew how it compared to my French press.

I just want an amazing cup of coffee that I can sit back on my porch and sip in the early morning sun. Is that too much to ask?!

[Anonymous No.11126434]

>>11126409

You gotta go out and get some good beans rather than some Folgers.

[Anonymous No.11126458]

>>11126089
A double shot of espresso poured into a mug of orange peko. Put it onto the counter and slam my face into it six or seven times. Drag me against the shards and knee me in the crotch from behind while I do a line of matcha powder off the cute baristas tits.

Literally the only way I can wake up these days

[Anonymous No.11126461]

a-a date would be nice...

[Anonymous No.11126488]

Aussie rules latte or cappuccino.

[Anonymous No.11126507]

>>11126434
I despise folgers.
In terms of beans I have a feeling that the ones I buy have some type of flavoring that stays stable over time. I don't have a grinder yet (cardinal sin, I know) so I do it at the store. When I make coffee from it the next month it still has flavor. I do keep it in an airtight jar that was made specifically for storing coffee but I don't think it would do much for ground beans.
>>11126458
>Drag me against the shards
Does that include your balls for a mile just so you can hear her fart through a walkie talkie?

[Anonymous No.11126518]

>>11126089
One of you coffee autists told me 3 shots of espresso in 16 oz of water, specifically. I tried it. It was pretty good, I'll keep getting it for a bit. Thanks anon.

[Anonymous No.11126535]

>>11126089
Just a water, please. No need to start my day with an addictive, psychoactive stimulant.

[Anonymous No.11126573]

>>11126089
a glass of activated almond milk please

[Anonymous No.11126578]

Wow, you're wearing a smock so you must really know what you're doing. Whatever you recommend sexy smock wearing fetish guy.

[Anonymous No.11126587]

>>11126089
One submissive mommy gf pls

[Anonymous No.11126604]

>>11126535
For me it's that morning coffee poop that is the enjoyable part.

[Anonymous No.11126611]

>>11126578
Do Americans really call aprons "smocks"?

[Anonymous No.11126647]

>>11126611
they are interchangeable.

[Anonymous No.11126691]

>>11126518
That's an Americano. Flavor of espresso but roughly the strength of drip.

[Anonymous No.11126720]

o-one espresso please

[Anonymous No.11126770]

>>11126611
Only the dumb ones.

Aprons don't have sleeves, smocks do.

[Anonymous No.11126795]

>>11126409
Coffee autist here. This is what you can do to improve your home brew stuff, from least to most work

>Figure out what “great coffee” means to you (no bitterness? a specific flavor?) and make that a target to shoot for
>Find a third wave roaster that you like and get your beans from them - bonus if they’re local or have an online ordering service so you can get the beans really fresh.
>Get a conical burr grinder so they’re freshly ground
>Buy/find the Ritual Brew Book and read the part on French Press. It tells you in simple terms exactly how to make great coffee at home.
>Get a weighing scale to measure exactly how many beans go into each pot.
>Experiment with tiny changes in the recipe until you get what you’re looking for.

This is basically what I did, and I can reliably make tasty coffee in a French Press without leaving my kitchen.

[Anonymous No.11126797]

>>11126089
I'm not your bud, guy

[Anonymous No.11126799]

Quad shot espresso over ice. A chocolate muffin too.

[Anonymous No.11126845]

Warm milk and Bosco, pls.
Where is the cape hanger?

[Anonymous No.11126868]

>college coffee shop has a bowl of condoms on the counter
anyone else experienced this?

[Anonymous No.11126898]

>>11126868
do you perhaps attend a (((public))) university?

[Anonymous No.11127045]

>>11126795
I have a scale and I know I need a conical style grinder. Anything else I should look for in a grinder?
As far as knowing what I like, that's tough. I guess the only solution is to try many different things. Definitely don't want a bitter cup. I want something smooth with a good flavor, "body" (which I think I understand now after switching from k-cups) and a clean finish.


>>11126868
Sounds like a liberal arts school.

[Anonymous No.11127080]

>looks him straight in the eye
>takes a sip of the bubble tea I got at the place across the street
>takes out an earbud
Yeah, you got a bathroom?

[Anonymous No.11127597]

>>11126089
Your number

[Anonymous No.11127667]

>>11127045
>Sounds like a liberal arts school.
what, people don't have sex in STEM schools?
hehehe just kidding OF COURSE THEY DONT

[Anonymous No.11127674]

>>11126898
Education should be free. Dont shit on free education, trustfund faggot

>inb4 not even public universities in burgerstan is free

t. yuropoor attending uni for free

[Anonymous No.11127716]

>>11126089
>Grande white chocolate mocha, de-caf non-fat, two pumps raspberry syrup, three pumps caramel, extra skimmed milk, and hold the ice please

[Anonymous No.11128034]

>>11126089
Nespresso. What else?

[Anonymous No.11128063]

>>11126089

A Gun

[Anonymous No.11128071]

>>11126157
>not just assuming he means regular drip

[Anonymous No.11128096]

Flat white please mate. Cheers lad

[Anonymous No.11128177]

>>11127674
>free

[Anonymous No.11128207]

I'll have JUST A REGULAR COFFEE none of that FANCY SHIT