/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.10762814]

ITT: things that aren't food that you've eaten.

When I was a kid I accidentally ate a gem.

[Anonymous No.10762818]

my uncle reginald ate a retired U.S. navy single prop plane from the 1940s, piece by piece, over a period of 8 years

[Anonymous No.10762819]

Fast food burgers

[Anonymous No.10762835]

>>10762818

rustic american cuisine

[Anonymous No.10762842]

My grandfather had a golf ball farm.
I'll never forget the way they screamed when he killed them.

[Anonymous No.10762844]

Golf balls are made of raw tuna?

[Anonymous No.10762848]

my sister ate a bath seltzer when she was like 9
when I was like 3 or 4 I stuck a cheerio up my nose and couldn't get it out. mom had to get the tweezers up in there. did the same thing with a dime a couple months later.

[Anonymous No.10762876]

Took a bite out of soap when I was a kid. Wouldn't recommend, taste is severely worse than smell.

[Anonymous No.10762910]

>>10762848
i put a bead from a necklace up my nose when i was 3, had to go to a hospital to get it removed. my parents told me that when he took it out i screamed at them to put it back in

[Anonymous No.10762926]

>>10762910
im a girl by the way, if that matters at all

[Anonymous No.10762957]

>>10762926
im not a girl by the way, if that matters at all

[Anonymous No.10762960]

>>10762910
>>10762926
Do you still like putting beads inside yourself?

[Anonymous No.10762962]

>>10762910

same happened here with a colouring pen cap while chewing it when I was around 7. Except I didnt scream to get it back, was rather happy when the doctors vacuumed it out of my throat.
Also ate some silica gel from a shoe but nothing bad happened.
One of my cousins used to enjoy dipping sticks through gutter drain grills ( though not in the city, countryside so I guess its less hardcore ), and licking them afterwards when she was a kid. She probably has the immune system of an average chinese labrador now.

[Anonymous No.10762963]

I would eat a gem too tbhfamalam

[Anonymous No.10762990]

>>10762814
>he only just found out golfballs are made of fish

[Anonymous No.10763006]

Drank nail polish remover when I was an toddler. I guess I liked that lemony scent they add to it. Threw it up shortly afterwards.

[Anonymous No.10763036]

>>10762814
I ate some pale green soap that was shaped like a dinosaur once. I got it in an Easter basket one year so I figured it was chocolate. Who the fuck gives a kid soap for Easter?

[Anonymous No.10763038]

>>10763036
Someone who wanted you to eat it.

[Anonymous No.10763041]

I used to like eating toothpaste and sand a lot as a kid. Don't know why.

[Anonymous No.10763043]

>>10762818
Did he died?

[Anonymous No.10763049]

>>10762818
I believe the story but only because his name is Reginald. Reggies are real crazy fuckers.

[Anonymous No.10763051]

>>10762926
can i put my penis inside your body

[Anonymous No.10763055]

>>10762963
Phos is a girl and nothing you can say will change that for me.

[Anonymous No.10763056]

Is gum food? At any rate my mother used to buy me these delicious red gums with an incredible texture from the gas station down the road. I would chew them until the flavor went away and then swallow them. My memory says I did that for many years but for all I know it could've been only six months that I was doing that. When I was around 6 I stopped doing it because someone told me you aren't supposed to swallow gum or it'll clog up your organs. I used to envision something like a tendon with gum wrapped around it and that was sufficiently scary enough to make me stop. I wonder how long I actually did that for and if it had any real effect.

[Anonymous No.10763067]

>>10763055
>draw a girl
>have it voiced by a girl
>give it the hips of a girl
>have it wear girls clothing
>call it a sexless rock
gemiko IS a girl

[Anonymous No.10763068]

>>10762818
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michel_Lotito

[Anonymous No.10763072]

>>10762960
sorry to burst that bubble, but nah, not a big fan

[Anonymous No.10763081]

>>10763068
>He was awarded a brass plaque by the Guinness Book to commemorate his abilities. He consumed it as well.
>He consumed it as well.
dedication

[Anonymous No.10763084]

>>10762848
When I was 3 or 4 I shoved a ball of tinfoil in my nose, and it was stuck for 2 weeks(?). It eventually hurt so bad that my mother took me to the hospital, and apparently took 4 nurses to hold me down as the doctor got tweezers to pull it out

[Anonymous No.10763117]

i ate a thumbtack and a quarter when i was a baby and no harm came to me

but of course my poor mom had to check my poop to make sure it passed

[Anonymous No.10763119]

>>10763084
>Kids: the best birth control

[Anonymous No.10763124]

>>10762814
Boogers, baby powder, baby shampoo, marbles, wax fruit, rotting wood, a fly, a grasshopper, a piece of fabric, rope, tree branch, dirt, hair gel, crayons, pencil, paint (water based), paper, toilet paper, cardboard

[Anonymous No.10763155]

I unironically ate a Tide Pod thinking it was candy when I was nine, I instantly spat it out though

[Anonymous No.10763156]

>>10763124
>rope
I used to get long pieces of string, swallow them until I get about half or 3/4 down my throat, then slowly pull em out. I still do that with stretched out pieces of gum actually

[Anonymous No.10763173]

As a child I ate a wood chip

[Anonymous No.10763175]

>>10763155
>Tide Pod
>When I was nine

[Anonymous No.10763191]

>>10763156
Do you do it with penis?

[Anonymous No.10763195]

>>10763191
n-no

[Anonymous No.10763199]

I ate some thumbtacks as a kid
was completely fine

[Anonymous No.10763201]

Pussy. Also, semen.

[Anonymous No.10763218]

>>10763195
Oh. Ok.

[Anonymous No.10763285]

>>10762814

Only non-food things I've eaten were coins, and it was by accident. Happened multiple times and I still remember what swallowing a quarter feels like. Hurts a bit, but at least they went down.

[Anonymous No.10763287]

I've drank both mouthwash and hand sanitizer to avoid DTs.

[Anonymous No.10763303]

>>10763287
and how are you these days?

[Anonymous No.10763316]

>>10762814
your mom's pussy

[Anonymous No.10763317]

>>10763303
I don't fuck with alcohol anymore. I use other drugs but nothing I get so out of control with.

[Anonymous No.10763321]

>>10763317
im happy for you. alcoholism is worse than death.

[Anonymous No.10763369]

>>10763321
Thanks breh. Hope you get better if you're struggling. It's no picnic feeling straight up evicted from life.

[Anonymous No.10763371]

When I was a kid I ate a small lightbulb. Ended up just shitting shards of glas out but the medfag told mom she had to disect my shit to make sure it came out. Mom's are the absolute cucks of the world.

[Anonymous No.10763697]

>>10762814
Not quite the same, but

>Primary school, about 9 or 10
>Break time
>There's a display of Hindu stuff on some shelves
>"Hey, check /this/ out"
>Pretend to mime drinking from a long, thin, jug
>OG Absolute madman
>Lift it vertically while holding it to my mouth
>It's actually full of red dye powder
>Drops right down my throat
>Run over to the sink and frantically try to get it out
>Teacher walks by and panics because a kid's coughing up mouthfuls of red
>Explain what happened
>Tells me off for being an idiot

But the jokes on her, because I'm still an idiot. I get pretty bad panic attacks on Diwali though.

[Anonymous No.10763717]

>>10762835
underrated

[Anonymous No.10763723]

>>10763068
>>10763081
So he's like a more badass LA Beast?

[Anonymous No.10764027]

>>10763723
>badass
Is that how millenials say "retarded?"

[Anonymous No.10764295]

>>10762814
I eat a piece of Go whatever they're called

[Anonymous No.10764330]

>>10763124
I have always liked the look of rotting wood that's wet. Looks like it would be good sliced and sauteed like a mushroom. Honestly sounds like a new idea for Noma.

[Anonymous No.10764353]

I've eaten a penny and an earthworm if you don't count it as food.

[Anonymous No.10764605]

>>10763156
I do that with ramen noodles.

[Anonymous No.10764698]

I've eaten coins, nuts, bolts, BBs, crayons, ass, toothpaste, and some other random stuff.

[Anonymous No.10765238]

>>10763287

[Anonymous No.10765254]

>>10764330
I think there is a guy somewhere in france or germany who sells driftwood-oil, i.e. olive-oil with driftwood pieces for the flavor.

[Anonymous No.10765390]

ate mothball as a kid because I thought it was rock salt

[Anonymous No.10765408]

>>10764330
>sounds like a good idea for noma
You're an asshole of the highest caliber

[Anonymous No.10765422]

pulled the tab off a can of soda and dropped it into the drink when I was 7-8. Thought I was smart enough to not drink it but promptly swallowed the thing

[Anonymous No.10765443]

I shit you not- we visited DC a few years back and my daughter who was maybe 4 at the time went past the ropes ect and attempted to lick the fucking hope diamond.

[Anonymous No.10765472]

Gasoline, unleaded 98.

People drink it in Africa. Spent some time in this shithole, eventually tried the "cou de pié", that is beer and gasoline, then the "ti camion", rum and gasoline, and eventually I started drinking it raw.

You wouldn't believe the farts that came out.

[Anonymous No.10765479]

>>10762814
when i was like 14 i picked up a small green pebble from a planter while waiting in line for Splash Mountain in orlando and held it in my hand wondering what it was. I continued to ponder all through the ride when I concluded that it was a Nerd about 20 seconds before the drop on the ride. It was fertilizer.

[Anonymous No.10765484]

Grass is actually quite tasty.

[Anonymous No.10765493]

>>10762814
Laundry soap

[Anonymous No.10765516]

>>10762926
Why would that matter? Fuck off.

[Anonymous No.10765672]

toothpaste and a cat food kibble once

[Anonymous No.10765680]

>>10762876
This is why man beasts smell horrid, Why do you think soap smells bad lmfao. soap is goat. Traps and femboys use it everyday w/ pummel stones so you're doing it wrong.

[Anonymous No.10765699]

>>10763316
Haha, you pranked me.

[Anonymous No.10765729]

>>10763175
How was your tenth birthday last month?

[Anonymous No.10765738]

>>10763055
so you'll suck her feminine rock hard penis?

[Anonymous No.10765739]

A bumblebee and a quarter and some nickles. Guess I can't be called worthless anymore

[Anonymous No.10765745]

>>10762814
Dirt

[Anonymous No.10765756]

>>10762990
That's pork anon

[Anonymous No.10765771]

when i was a kid and wanted a day off school i would eat a small bit of soap and throw up in the sink

[Anonymous No.10765807]

>>10765738
She has no genitals but if she did I would.

[Anonymous No.10765815]

>>10762818
Your uncle was a brave French indeed

[Anonymous No.10765852]

>>10762926
Post tits or gtfo

[Anonymous No.10765857]

>>10765852
This, unfortunately

[Anonymous No.10765948]

>>10762835

[Anonymous No.10766049]

>>10765680
What? Nobody said soap smells bad, just that it tastes terrible even if the smell is nice. Though there are some soaps that smell like absolute dogshit.

[Anonymous No.10766051]

>>10762814

[Anonymous No.10766056]

>>10763055
friendly reminder that the gender of the gems is up to the reader! I say she is a G I R L too

[Anonymous No.10766062]

>>10765390
>I thought it was rock salt
this just raises further questions!

[Anonymous No.10766075]

>>10765472
Do you sound like a car backfiring?

[Anonymous No.10766082]

>>10762814
>>10766051

[Anonymous No.10766086]

I ate a cigarette when I was 5

[Anonymous No.10766090]

>>10762814
>>10766082

[Anonymous No.10766098]

A tiny piece of my foot, I wish I were joking.

[Anonymous No.10766158]

A nice high plasma content crunchy wound scab.
2 weeks ago my dumb 28yo ass fell and wounded a knee and then a dumb nurse applied iodine right in the wound so it went wild, producing tons of blood glue. Was probably worth it.

[Anonymous No.10766188]

>>10762814
Is everyone just going to ignore whatever is inside that golf ball or wat

[Anonymous No.10766191]

>>10762926
>ywn scream at me to put it back in
;_;

[Anonymous No.10766193]

>>10766188
Why did no one tell me golf balls look so delicious inside?

[Anonymous No.10766204]

>>10762814
my own semen
used to have a friend in middle school who would eat all sorts of nasty shit from the yard though
>leaves
>flowers
>insects but he wouldn't swallow
>chewed on some bark once
fucker probably would have climbed a tree and taken a straight bite out of a bee's nest if he weren't fat but I still love the crazy guy

[Anonymous No.10766207]

The poz load at my last poz party.

[Anonymous No.10766315]

>>10765729
You are stupid, right?

[Anonymous No.10766408]

>>10763072
what kind of new faggotry is this fuck off roastie

[Anonymous No.10766453]

>>10762835
What's the joke here?

[Anonymous No.10766527]

>>10765408
Why? And I said new idea, not good.

[Anonymous No.10766546]

>>10763072
Leave you nasty whore no one cares that you're a girl. Fuck off

[Anonymous No.10766548]

>>10762926
Literally no body will ever care.

[Anonymous No.10766559]

>>10765516
>>10765852
>>10766548
>>10766546
>those 16 year old edgy boomers that reply to bait

[Anonymous No.10766585]

>>10762814
My sisters convinced me that soap was cheese when I was 3.

[Anonymous No.10766594]

>>10764027
yes

[Anonymous No.10766617]

when I was young there was woodchip wallpaper next to my bed and I picked off and ate all the woodchips.

[Anonymous No.10766705]

>>10766193
What's the point of coloring the rubber inside golf balls?

[Anonymous No.10766715]

Ate some cat food when I was like 6 because my cat liked to eat human food, so I thought his kibble tasted similar. It didn't.

I also used to put my mouth around one of the slats in my wooden dining chair until I was 6 or 7 because I liked the taste of the varnish.

Accidentally, I've probably eaten more paint/India ink/various other art supplies than is healthy. In an "that apple tasted odd...shit, I must have splattered paint on it" type of way. Oops.

[Anonymous No.10766721]

When I was a kid I used to eat shit.
My mother had a photo of me literally scooping out the shit from the toilet.

[Anonymous No.10766726]

>>10766705
I assume it's from a large batch and some the batch is used for something where the colour makes sense.
Or maybe it just makes it easier for the factory workers to tell the difference between different mixes.

[Anonymous No.10766730]

>>10766705
Different types of ball use different rubber, the coloring is tell them apart in production.

[Anonymous No.10766749]

>>10763697
>>10763697
>I get pretty bad panic attacks on Diwali though
Fucking kek

[Anonymous No.10766855]

>>10762814
what kind? i have an unpolished sapphire if you want to try again.

[Anonymous No.10766864]

>>10763068
>Lotito died of natural causes on June 25, 2007, ten days after his 57th birthday.[9] He is buried at Saint Roch Cemetery in Grenoble.
>natural causes
>57

[Anonymous No.10766872]

>>10766864
this is like saying "i'm a cigarette smoker and died of a heart attack in my sleep and i died of natural causes".

[Anonymous No.10766945]

>>10766527
That's just a really faggy thing to say. Assuming you have an idea that would be worth the chefs time at a place like that. It's not something the human body could even digest, you fucking retard. Go back to the salad line, you fucking brainlet.

[Anonymous No.10766950]

>>10762814
During a bout of severe vitamin deficiency I got a craving for chalk so strong, I broke down, got a pack, and gnawed them all like carrot sticks.

[Anonymous No.10767611]

>>10766950
That makes my teeth hurt to think about, fuck. I feel like pulling my fingernails off and my skin is crawling. Holy shit I dont know why thinking of eating chalk gives me that reaction but fuck that is repulsive. I dont have an image for my discomfort or horror.

[Anonymous No.10767727]

>>10763287
what is a DT?

[Anonymous No.10767737]

>>10767727
delirium tremens; severe alcohol withdrawals.

[Anonymous No.10767767]

>>10762814

a stick of fruit-flavored lipstick.

Turns out it doesn't taste like fruit if you take a whole bite of it.

[Anonymous No.10767892]

>>10762818
For some reason this made me so happy

[Anonymous No.10768054]

>>10766408
>>10766546

i dont even know what happened. im not a girl. some other guy replied to my original post and said im a girl, im not. i literally was framed

[Anonymous No.10768066]

>>10768054
Only a dick pic could prove this.

[Anonymous No.10768104]

>>10765422
I know that feeling
>at a shitty party in highschool
>someone is throwing around those tiny dice you get in travel sizes board games for some reason
>one lands in my drink
>don't want to stick my hand in to fish it out, don't want to waste it
>"I'll just drink around it"
>take a careful sip
>30 seconds later already forgotten
>down half the glass
>hgk
>die is gone

[Anonymous No.10768106]

>>10768066
eh they are out there already

[Anonymous No.10768116]

>>10762814
Stickers
Bubbles
A penny.

[Anonymous No.10768180]

>>10768066
>bizarro /ck/
>show balls or gtfo

[Anonymous No.10768243]

>>10763124
Mmm, grayons.

[Anonymous No.10768277]

>>10762814
for me, it was a coin

[Anonymous No.10768302]

Fleshlight full of macaroons

[Anonymous No.10768507]

>>10763317
potassium?

[Anonymous No.10768513]

>>10766193
what is happening?

[Anonymous No.10768547]

>>10762876
I brushed my teeth w/ hand soap instead of teethpaste a few weeks ago

[Anonymous No.10768557]

cockroach took a swim in my coffee and I realized too late.

[Anonymous No.10769446]

>>10762814
Accidentally ate one of my baby teeth when I was eating corn on the cob.

[Anonymous No.10769523]

>>10763156
my dad nearly choked to death before i was born to two pieces of boomer meat connected by a strand of fat/sinew, apparently went blue and shit, so this is terrifying to read ngl

[Anonymous No.10770114]

I used to eat chapstick when I was a kid.

[Anonymous No.10770138]

>>10762814
I had long-ish hair as a little kid and had a bad habit of chewing large pieces of it off, whatever I could get into my mouth, then spitting it out and throwing it away. I did this for a short while until one day Mom went into the bathroom after me at a Chinese restaurant and saw a bunch of my hair in the garbage can.

[Anonymous No.10770146]

>>10762814
A fucking gem? What the fuck.

[Anonymous No.10770260]

Dog food and treats.
Crayons
Chapstick
A cactus I found
The stuff inside glow sticks
A cigarette
Probably more

[Anonymous No.10770262]

i was so hungry once that I ate blistex chapstick. do not recommend.

[Anonymous No.10770379]

I unscrewed me entire coke flavoured chapsitck and ate it - didn't taste like it smelled.

In high school I had a friend who would say 'Dare me to eat this stink bug?'. He was one of those kids that was going to do it anyway, he just wanted you to 'dare' him. He ended up eating around 50 stinkbugs that year.

[Anonymous No.10770384]

>>10770379
>50
what the fuck
Did it taste good to that autist?

[Anonymous No.10770393]

>>10770384
He had a screw loose, I think he ended up in jail at some point after we finished.

[Anonymous No.10770400]

I ate the fluffy stuff that was inside a cigarette regularly for a while. Don't know any of the long term consequences of it though.

[Anonymous No.10770407]

>>10770400
Hopefully nothing, but depending on when maybe asbestos (you'd already be fucked though, so no use worrying).
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cigarette_filter
also checked

[Anonymous No.10770431]

>>10766193
looks like some kind of pate

[Anonymous No.10770487]

>>10762814
>>10762910
When I was in like 5th grade I ate several beads just cause. I wanted to be like weird or some shit, or cool idk.
I’d swallow them whole after asking kids if they would dare me.

[Anonymous No.10770513]

>>10763056
>gum stays stuck in you for 7 years
Who made this dumb shit up? Gum is plan matter. There are sticker things than gum that pass fine. Doesn't even stay in you longer than a week. Huge pain if it gets caught in your ass hair I bet.

[Anonymous No.10770520]

>>10770487
We had these https://www.theage.com.au/news/national/recall-for-toy-that-turns-into-drug/2007/11/06/1194329225773.html
Although I never played with them, I bet they tasted nice.

[Anonymous No.10770564]

I eat toothpicks after using one.

[Anonymous No.10770623]

>>10765680
>pummel stones
It's pumice stones, you mongoloid.

[Anonymous No.10770659]

>>10763155
>In 2012, Procter & Gamble relaunched a liquid tablet product as Tide Pods.
>2012
>9 years old
You are actually underage

[Anonymous No.10770682]

>>10762814
I bit off a small piece of a Superman action figure when I was little, it resulted in a permanent chip on the back corner of his hair.

[Anonymous No.10770702]

>>10770487
I recall snorting a bead and having it stuck in my nostril overnight when I was 4, my mother was pissed.

[Anonymous No.10770724]

>>10770702
Mixing inebriated parents and young children is always a mistake.

[Anonymous No.10770731]

>>10770659
>relaunched
>re
Not so smart now eh, mister big brain?

[Anonymous No.10770764]

>>10768054
show balls or gtfo

[Anonymous No.10770770]

>>10770764
That's very sexist, anon.

[Anonymous No.10770879]

>>10770520
Nah mine were regular beads for bracelets

[Anonymous No.10770907]

>>10762814
bathsalt. no idea why i even ate it pure.

[Anonymous No.10770911]

>>10763287
You fakin jackass. just buy some Vanilla extract/imitation and some milk. tastes like a white russian