/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.10563930]

>mfw I've been holding the knife wrong my whole life

[Anonymous No.10563934]

>>10563930
A knife is a crutch for a cook. Real chefs don't use them.

[Anonymous No.10564320]

>>10563934
I didn't know anyone still used those dangerous antiquated weapons for cooking. You can't even buy them where I live. Honestly owning one is just an accident waiting to happen, I don't see why anyone would even take such a risk for simple convenience. It's just plain irresponsible.

[Anonymous No.10564330]

The pinch grip does usually offer the best compromise between precise control and force. Other grips are just as legit though, like the hammer grip where you just grip the handle. Unlike the pinch grip this will let you use the full length of the blade. Or the thumb grip, which is like the hammer grip but you have your thumb on the spine of the blade, for maximum strength. Or the point grip, where you have the whole index finger resting on the spine off the blade, which gives you little strength but maximum control for stuff like tomatoes and sushi.

[Anonymous No.10564332]

>>10563934
>Real chefs don't use them
Yeah, they use their line cooks.

[Anonymous No.10564349]

>>10563930
>holding the knife wrong

https://youtu.be/z4lwLUO_SEs
https://youtu.be/L0bAc6mc5GM?t=3m16s

[Anonymous No.10564427]

I do always wonder how people cut themselves
I've been cooking for 10 years and I've never managed to cut myself with a knife

[Anonymous No.10564501]

>>10564427
microwaving hot pockets for 10 years doesn’t count as cooking

[Anonymous No.10564502]

For ultimate control.

[Anonymous No.10564621]

>>10564427
Not cutting yourself is easy if you only cook for yourself and have all the time in the world and never attempt to get faster by pushing the limits.

[Anonymous No.10564622]

>>10564502
I hope that was a joke ... ?

[Anonymous No.10564637]

>>10563934
I just use my teeth and spit the food out, no one knows if you are good enough cook

[Anonymous No.10564879]

>>10564622
I'm really not sure, the whole thread was a shitshow, but he seemed to be genuinely trying to make food.

[Anonymous No.10564925]

The pinch grip is great, but I've never seen a knife actually designed for it and I think that's strange. Why not extend the handle over the back of the blade a bit?

[Anonymous No.10565038]

Chef John taught me to use the pinch grip. It felt so natural after just a few minutes.

[Anonymous No.10565698]

>>10564330
>index finger on the spine of the blade
Oh, you mean the "i don't know how to cook" grip

[Anonymous No.10565706]

>>10564502
Handles are for pussies

[Anonymous No.10565807]

>>10564320
Get a life, bin that knife.

You don't need it for cooking. Help us continue to keep our crime rates low, putting American cities to shame with London's low scores.

[Anonymous No.10565821]

>>10564637
Someone posted a webm of a lady doing that in a food gore thread, and it is honestly the most disgusting thing I've seen on 4chan.

[Anonymous No.10565825]

>>10564427
If you have ever actually "cooked" something then you would have cut yourself many times over 10 years, and burned your self at least a few times.

[Anonymous No.10565906]

>>10564332
Fukken KEK'd

[Anonymous No.10565911]

>>10565825
Not everybody is a klutz like you seem to be.

[Anonymous No.10566206]

>>10565911
It's clear to others here that you never cook

It's like if you said you're an avid runner and have never experienced any sort of running-related injury

Or you write software and your software has no bugs

That isn't how the world works, take note next time you want to LARP as something other than a YouTube addicted NEET

[Anonymous No.10566228]

Pinch grip is for intermediate proficiency and if you do a lot of rock chopping.

When you start to get good and fast and do mostly tap chopping, a baseball bat grip with the thumb on the spine or first index finger on the spine works better

[Anonymous No.10566231]

>>10566206
The only cooking-related cut I've given myself did't even draw blood.

Now then I have cut myself plenty of times as a kid, learning to use a knife for woodcarving, as well as with other woodworking tools.

I've burned myself in the kitchen a handful of times but all were so minor that they're not worth mentioning.

Perhaps I got all the dumbass injuries out of my system well before I started cooking?

>>t's like if you said you're an avid runner and have never experienced any sort of running-related injury

There's a big fucking difference between claiming an incident vs "many times".

[Anonymous No.10566274]

>>10566231
>many times
Your words, and nobody else's

We're anonymous here, you don't need to lie to save face. It's ok. Cooking is not strictly necessary to survive.

[Anonymous No.10566282]

>>10566274
You're right bro, I'm just making shit up. In reality you're 100% right. Every person on earth is just as much a klutz as you are.

[Anonymous No.10566291]

>>10566282
Correct. People make mistakes, and nobody cooks for 10 years without the occasional cut. It follows therefore that you are full of shit, and don't cook.

Was that so hard? Now fuck off.

[Anonymous No.10566303]

>>10565825
Not really, I cook basically every day and the last time I cut myself was in I think 2006, and that was because I was drunk as a gourd. The vast majority of the time the edge of the knife isn't even aimed at any part of you.

[Anonymous No.10566320]

>>10566303
>I've only cooked drunk once in 12 years
Do you wait until everyone is sitting down with their backs straight and dad has said grace, or WTF? What kind of person never drinks when cooking?

[Anonymous No.10566339]

>>10564349
To be fair, I would have no idea how to open a coconut with my regular kitchen implements either. Although, to take away that fairness, I'm not opening a goddamn restaurant.

[Anonymous No.10566345]

>>10566320
I cook drunk all the time, I still don't cut myself. That's just the last time it happened.

[Anonymous No.10566371]

>>10563934
OK Jackie Chan you keep telling yourself karate chopping your carrots makes them taste better

[Anonymous No.10566427]

My last drunk cooking. My pad thai had more meat in it than expected.

[Anonymous No.10566494]

>>10566291
People are on a fucking bell curve. Most people cut themselves every once in a while. Some people cut themselves rarely if ever. Others are walking commercials for bandaids. Is it really so hard to understand that not everyone lies on the same part of the bell curve?

Belive me, I make plenty of fuckups. And I've had some scary close calls. But not cuts. Why is this so hard for you to grasp?

[Anonymous No.10566528]

>>10566494
What's more likely: that you're in the 99th percentile of people when it comes to cooking regularly and never cutting yourself? Or that you, in the grand tradition of /ck/, are LARPing as a Michelin star chef when the most complicated thing you've ever done was add an egg to your maruchan noodles?

Why are you so defensive about being found out?

[Anonymous No.10566551]

>>10566528
Apparently its more than 1%, because there's 21 (now) 22 posters ITT, and counting myself makes TWO people who never cut themselves.

[Anonymous No.10566558]

>>10566551
In the drunk driving thread last week we had multiple people claiming they drive better after a few beers. Really activates my almonds.

[Anonymous No.10566560]

>>10566528
What's the point of being "found out" on an anonyomous board? How could I possibly be lying to make myself look better when nobody knows who I am? That doesn't even make sense.

I'm not defensive about being "found out". I'm annoyed at not being taken seriously. What do I possibly have to gain from lying about it?

And who the fuck said anything about 99th %? Fuck , 70% is probably good enough not to get cuts worthy of mention. What I am claiming is neither rare nor bragworthy. It just is.

Now dropping dishes? I've got that shit down. Cutting myself? Nope.

[Anonymous No.10566562]

>>10566558
Are you suggesting that like a person who THINKS they drive better when drunk, that I've actually been cutting myself all the time without knowing it?

Are you a fucking retard?
Dunning-Kruger doesn't apply when you have a TANGIBLE METRIC like, "How often I cut myself".

[Anonymous No.10566568]

>>10566562
Just as tangible as "how much some anonymous shitposter cooks in real life" is verifiable.

If it would make you feel better though, I can tell you that I admire you for being such a skilled patrician superhuman with an everyday cooking habit that is definitely not pure fantasy on your part.

[Anonymous No.10566575]

>>10566560
Indeed, what is the point?

Also, if you're here for validation, you're on the wrong website. Try facebook. Except the problem is persistent identity, so it's a bit harder to not be found out.

[Anonymous No.10566578]

>>10566568
Bro, I'm not some kind of knife-wizard just because I've never cut myself.

I mean, its probably either that my knives are on the dull side, or I have some kinda cut-resistent skin.
Cuz what I HAVE done is touched myself with a blade and then thoght, "oooo, I thought that cut me"

Seriously tho, why you so butthurt about stupid shit?

[Anonymous No.10566591]

>>10566578
>I'm not defensive, YOU'RE defensive
It's ok, I already said I admire your patrician cooking skills and dedication to die kunts der la gastronomie. Pat yourself on the back for me please.

[Anonymous No.10566602]

>>10566575
>>Indeed, what is the point?
Correcting a mistake.

>>10565825 claimed that all cooks would have cut themselves "many times" over 10 years. I'm saying that's not necissarily true. It's no different than pointing out a spelling or grammatical error. See mistake. Correct mistake.

>>validation
How could anyone possibly be here for valiation unless they're posting pics and tripfagging? It's an anon board. Validation cannot be had here, the very concept is nonsensical.

[Anonymous No.10566610]

>>10566591
Man, I'm just telling you to relax. Not everything people say is some kind of attack or accusation.

[Anonymous No.10566621]

>>10566610
>>10566602
The fact that you can't even manage to consolidate all your replies into a single post tells me you're getting a little too worked up over this, but we already knew that, didn't we.

I'm off to watch DS9 reruns and then fall asleep, enjoy your LARPing, maybe I'll see you tomorrow.

[Anonymous No.10566641]

>>10566621
You're talking with two different people, foolio.

I still can't belive you can't get the concept of how different people have different skills into your head. When you see real outliers like pro athletes I wonder how your brain handles that?

[Anonymous No.10566650]

>>10566621
So now you're claiming samefaggotry?

I'd say this is the last gasp of someone getting btfo, but what the fuck is even the argument here?

[Anonymous No.10567493]

>>10565698
>the "i don't know how to cook" grip
I sai for tomatoes and sushi, it is legit for very soft stuff that needs to be sliced very precisely. But yes it is the mark of an incompetent cook for other stuff.

[Anonymous No.10567528]

>>10565821
sauce please

[Anonymous No.10567646]

>>10565821
Well c'mon faggot post it

[Anonymous No.10567692]

>>10567646
>twisting your testicles
>ever
Horrific. People die from testicular torsion.

[Anonymous No.10567977]

>>10566427
hehe nice.. That's basically why I stopped cooking drunk.A few months back I cut open two fingers, stopped the bleeding, got back to cooking and fucking cut open two other fingers on the same hand. I lost so much blood that I nearly fainted... Still can't feel anything with my left middle finger, probably cut a nerve or smth.

[Anonymous No.10567983]

>>10564502
>recipe called for three carrots
>i'm using four.

this man is a force of nature

[Anonymous No.10567985]

>>10567692
Have fun never impressing women with your penis puppetry.

[Anonymous No.10567997]

>>10566641
>hey /ck/ I'm a pro athlete tier cook why doesn't anyone believe me
And I'm the King of France
>>10566650
Repeatedly lying doesn't make a thing true

[Anonymous No.10568071]

>>10563930
OY mate stop right there, you got a permit for that blade???

[Anonymous No.10568183]

>>10564427
I never got how people seriously cut themselves (outside commercial settings), but small cuts are bound to happen if you're not careful, or use too much force.
>dicing onion
>those small edge bits where the surface is basically 45 degrees
>knife slips a little
>takes a chunk out of my index fingernail
>years later
>can still see the shape of the missing chunk
Not a real injury, but an example of how it can happen.

[Anonymous No.10568189]

>>10566551
>the amount of posters is the amount of people who participate in a thread
like, 90+% of the users of this site are fulltime lurkers.

[Anonymous No.10568198]

>cutting yourself
brainlets

[Anonymous No.10569545]

>>10567692
I actually had torsion a few months ago, unrelated to the hamburger

[Anonymous No.10569833]

>>10564320

unironically though most supermarkets sell pre diced common ingredients

[Anonymous No.10570197]

>>10569833
Sadly, yes. It is a vicious circle. Same with kitchen knives, the manufacturers make them thicker and thicker and they cut worse and worse because people are becoming too stupid, ignorant and careless to take proper care of them. Taking those extra 5 seconds to get a cleaver to cut through those bones would be too much of a bother, better just hammer my chef knife through with a mallet.