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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/ck/ - Food & Cooking


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10379410 No.10379410 [Reply] [Original]

>be me
>always write off binging with babish's shit as utter meme tier cooking until I watch his cookie video
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylxzfecackM
>get inspired
>Follow this hipster faggots cookie recipe down to a T
>went to store to get the ingredients I was missing
>browning butter all last night to get it perfect
>even refrigerate dough for around 18 hours
>pop in the oven at 350F
>cookies come out looking like a GODAMN ELDRITCH ABOMINATION

THIS IS EASLY THE WORST BATCH OF COOKIES IVE EVER MADE FUCK YOU BINGING WITH BABISH

>> No.10379418

how autistic are you that you fucked up cookies?

>> No.10379422

Does it at least taste good OP?

>> No.10379423
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10379423

Clearly you just suck at making cookies

>> No.10379424

>>10379410
are they edible

>> No.10379427

Damn, you must be a special case of retarded if you can't even make cookies.

>> No.10379430
File: 90 KB, 500x400, 1515438425044.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10379430

>>10379410
Nigga did he make your cookies? No, he didn't. Shut the fuck up. Babish is a good guy, I don't give a fuck what you neckbeard faggots think.

Eat a bag of dicks.

>> No.10379435

>>10379430
Babish is a 2 bit line chef that cant even make a fuckin burger

>> No.10379439

>>10379430
>a real person posted this

>> No.10379443

>>10379424
>>10379422
yeah they taste fine enough slightly salty

>> No.10379450
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10379450

>>10379435
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b3BN-qJzlHs
but he literally does. What, is his burgers not up to your special aspergerian standards?

>> No.10379452

>>10379410
Did you really crowd 8 cookies 1cm apart on a foiled lined cookie sheet and then underbake them? If those are browned butter, why do they look like they were made with shortening?

>> No.10379455

>>10379450
That shit looks like something out of an elemntary school cafeteria. Fuck outta here with that.

>> No.10379458

>>10379430
>t. babish
fuck off

>> No.10379459

>>10379455
Eat your dollar cheeseburgers from Micky D's while the big boys eat real burgers.

>> No.10379460

>did i get memed by following a recipe by a memer who doesn't know anything about cooking

>> No.10379472

>>10379410
Talbott>Babish
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=plZ086daSLA

>> No.10379480

>>10379410
>His cookies look decent
>yours look like shit
Seems like you just fucked up somehow desu

>> No.10379483

>>10379452
I swear to the lord almighty that I used browned butter

>> No.10379485
File: 681 KB, 2000x1333, TOLL-HOUSE-RECIPE.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10379485

>making anything other than the original Toll House recipe

The fuck is wrong with you guys?
Why do you look to some shitty youtuber before you even think about the tried and true classics?

>> No.10379498

You put too many on one sheet and you made them too big, idiot.

There's also a chance that a) your flour/baking soda were old which can contribute to a flat, spread out cookie too, or b) your oven temperature is uneven.

>> No.10379501

>>10379460
>a memer who doesn't know anything about cooking
Evidently he does know something about cooking. He’s not Gordon Ramsay, but you can learn a thing or two from him if you are a beginner in the kitchen

>> No.10379506

>>10379410
This
>>10379452
You either fucked up the recipe (let the dough get warm etc.) or your oven was too hot or too cold. Get an in-oven thermometer.

Just looking at the video for 15 sec, his dough consistency was good for CCCs, and with that recipe 350 F is the correct temp, even does well at 325, for the cookies to set and not flatten/fall when removed, and also set before spreading out.

If you put too much dough on the sheet, just do it "pizzookie" or griddle style - 375 for like 10 more min than the recipe calls for should be in the neighborhood, but you really have to watch that it sets.

Your batch looks like the CCCs fell so you either had too much dough and not enough time; or you cooked too hot (melts before sets), or you cooked too cool (spreads out before it sets).

TL;DR baking is a science, bitch

>> No.10379538
File: 174 KB, 1000x1334, 29831228_1709865869075046_1688265344_o.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10379538

op here how do I redeem my sins?

>> No.10379554

>>10379538
Blend with milk and drink

>> No.10379557

>dismiss Babish as a meme tier cook
>can't even make chocolate chip cookies right

People in glass houses, etc etc

>> No.10379562

>>10379410
>"hates" babish
>watches his latest videos
>even gets inspired
Give me a break. You get all moist from his voice, just admit it, hypocrite.

>> No.10379605

>>10379435
Are you the same moron who complained his burgers sucked, because "he didn't even grind the beef himself" in a reply to a burger video where he was literally grinding the beef himself?

>> No.10379624

>>10379455
Ok then, hothead, show the kind of burger you deem acceptable. Let us have some fun. Although I'm expecting crickets..

>> No.10379629

>>10379430
Your post may have caused some >>>/r9k/ fatasses to blow an artery. Which is a good thing.

>> No.10379632
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10379632

>>10379624

>> No.10379721

>>10379538

Just eat the fucking cookies dummy they look fine.

>> No.10379911
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10379911

>>10379410
>can't even make cookies
Have some canele

>> No.10379944

who fucks up cookies?

>> No.10380165
File: 1.36 MB, 500x253, 037d5a2fe7e7dda43f718acf58e49e398cd73e23.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10380165

>guy puts effort and passion into sharing what he loves to do
>faggot tries and fails to make cookies once
>calls him a hack fraud

>> No.10380204

>>10380165
Hey fagish, make like a tree and fuck off

>> No.10380798

Honestly you're right OP - I tried his pizza dough recipe and it's fucking awful, the dough isn't workable at all.

His pasta recipes are pretty good though.

>> No.10380815

>>10379410
What are you talking about? you have 1 big cookie

>> No.10381682

>>10380798
yeah im convinced he's a total hack who happened to catch a lucky break

>> No.10382975

>>10379506
fucking love cooking, it's one of those few areas where when you get better you can obviously tell you are better, and depending on what you are making, you can rapidly iterate.

>> No.10382984

>>10379410

> browning butter all night

Takes like 10-15 minutes from cold pan to brown butter wtf is you saying nigga

>> No.10383022

>>10379472
In gay vibe, definitely.

>> No.10383081
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10383081

here my issues with the recipe

the butter was not browned, at all. also you need to replace some of the water lost through evaporation, an ice cube is fine since it will help cool it down.

while the butter cools you can mix the eggs and white sugar, you ALWAYS want to do both dark brown and white, this help with flavor and cookie consistency. then when the butter is cool enough but not solid add it with the brown sugar.

The ingredients must be weighted, in baking you do not fucking eye ingredients and maybe thats why OP recipe got fucked up. you always get exact weights and use a scale for it. he is completely right about not overmixing the flour so you add the chocolate while theres still some white in the dough.
I do not reccomend pre made chips at all given that they get coated with who knows what so they dont stick togheter so as he said 2 bars of 4oz semi sweet chocolate will do the trick.

last thing is that those things are way too fucking huge. i do agree with splitting them in half but they shouldnt be bigger than 1oz.

thats my 5 cents and these are some i did a while back.

chopping the chocolate help make those swirls on them as well.

>> No.10384494

>>10379506
bakind isn't a science retard. most bakers don't even use chemistry to their advantage when baking like using gluten free flour for crunchy cookies.

>> No.10384505

>>10379538
Just say they're cookie Brownies they look fine

>> No.10384511

>>10384494
Because who the fuck would want crunchy cookies you mongoloid?

>> No.10384513

>>10383081
T A S T Y

>> No.10384521

>>10379605
No, and if you think his burgers are even remotely acceptable you're the guy everybody hates at the BBQ.

>>10379624
Go to literally any gastropub. That's a perfectly acceptable burger.
Not this white-bread-bun, head-of-lettuce-to-one-smash-patty bullshit. DUHH ITS DA CLASSIC 50S BURGER THO!!@!
Yeah faggot and it's also completely impossible to fuck up, why else would he do it?

>> No.10384708

>>10384521
GAstropub burgers are invariably shit. Thick, tasteless, dry, over sweet, with a nasty piece of tomato and unmelted cheese, not to mention being way too fucking big to eat without it falling apart

>> No.10384720

>>10379410
>tinfoil instead of directly on a dark baking sheet
>followed down to a T
lol

>> No.10384850

>>10384521
>ITS DA CLASSIC 50S BURGER THO!!@!

No shit you goddamn idiot. This is an actual, legitimate type of burger. That's what he set out to make. In what reality is succeeding at exactly what you set out to do a fuckup?

>> No.10384967

>>10379410
you didn't even preheat your oven did you?

also wtf is browning butter?

>> No.10385008

>>10379562
>getting aroused from a redditors awkward jokes and meme voice
watch him interact with anyone, he's a total beta

>> No.10385028

I made Babish's TMNT pizza the other day, easily the worst pizza I have ever had. No flavor whatsoever

>> No.10385039
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10385039

>>10379410
>Im so superior in cooking and i know everything
>I get inspired by chip cookies recipe lol, like i dont know how to do them and stuff
>reeeee g-guys, it didn't work out, b-but its baldy fault, not my autism?

You are at Jack level, congratulations.

>> No.10385416

>>10384850
>you goddamn idiot
If only he knew the unholy retribution his 'clever' little comment has brought about.

>> No.10385760

>>10379911
anon every time you post this you lose 1 day off your life

>> No.10385887

ITT:
>video evidence shows recipe obviously works
>bawww this shit tastes gross it must be babish's fault
>i'm not a bad cook, baka

>> No.10386538
File: 3.42 MB, 4032x3024, 20180210_003001.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10386538

>>10385887
What about mine? >>10385028 The pizza came out exactly as his video and it tastes like shit

>> No.10386629
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10386629

>>10379430
Babish is lowtier on the /ck/ husbando list. It goes something like this:
1. Steve
2. ReviewBrah
3. Brad+Vinny doubleteam
Do not lewd tier:
4. Francis the Dog
5. Townsends
6. Chef John

>> No.10386996

>>10386629
I can get behind this list

>> No.10388582

>>10379443
Then why do you care about them not being circles.

>> No.10388601

>>10386538
I don't know what that cunt was thinking when he called that slab of shit "New York style."

>> No.10388840

>>10379410
That's the risk you take with a cookie recipe with that much butter.

>> No.10388850

>>10383081
>not eyeballing dough
The second I graduated my autistic kitchen scale phase is the second I started baking on my own.
>my face when reading the perfect loaf autists

>> No.10389027
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10389027

>>10379410
lol, this nigga can't even make cookies. Back to the trash with you

>> No.10389042

>>10379410
who the fuck puts salt on their cookies at all, let alone this much fucking salt jesus christ.

>> No.10389047

>>10379562
>You get all moist from his voice
his voice sounds like he gargles soy for 8 hours a day every day.

>> No.10389049

>bingbing with babeesh

>> No.10389090

>>10379410
Much like his burger and a couple other recipes this is literally a Kenji recipe posted on serious eats a couple years ago.

>> No.10389352

>>10388850
>autistic kitchen scale phase
something that I never had, I make waffles from scratch from memory in just a pyrex measuring cup and they turn out okay every time

>> No.10389418

>>10379430
BWBIDF detected, he shilled the recipe and it's fucking shit, of course he is partially responsible for the things he creates, says and endorses.

>> No.10389432
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10389432

>>10389418
>shilled

>> No.10389433

>>10379410
Lmao is that a cookie or a new pokemon because it doesn't look like one

>> No.10389453

>Faggot crowded his cookies on the sheet.

This is literally your fault. You're the only meme here OP

>> No.10389458

>>10379538
Cheesecake? Parfait? Crumble?

>> No.10389482

>>10389418
>shilled
That word doesn't mean what you think it does, anon.

>> No.10389490

>>10384494
>bakind isn't a science retard
you tell 'em

>> No.10389817

Its got nothing to do with him. Baking is a science unlike the rest of cooking. If you follow baking instructions then your final products should be identical. Chances are you're like one of those moms who make posts on cooking sites like "It was terrible. I substituted cream cheese for butter and dog food for chocolate chips and it was nothing like what I expected!"

>> No.10389830
File: 317 KB, 623x379, cookies.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10389830

>>10389047
I'm gonna gargle soy for 8 hours a day now!

>> No.10389836

>>10388850
>"okay"

>> No.10389843

>>10386629
>husbando list
where is Jack?

>> No.10390081 [DELETED] 
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10390081

>> No.10390102

>>10379485
This. Those are undoubtedly the best chocolate chip cookies. You don't have to do anything out of the ordinary to make them, and you use basic baking ingredients for them.

>> No.10390120
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10390120

>>10389817
>then your final products should be identical
Different ovens, moisture/humidity, temperature, ingredients (quality, brands, composition), water
>identical

Sure.

>> No.10390152
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10390152

>>10386629
Chef John is pure and must be protected. We are all the Mussolini's of our Linguine.

>> No.10390235

>>10379538
>I made cookie bars!

>> No.10390247

>>10389843
Dead last.

>> No.10390300

>>10389027
but op clearly made a cookie

>> No.10390325

>>10379501
the most you could learn from him is how to mispronounce things in a unique fashion. Never heard someone say "per nod" or how he says orecchiette

>> No.10390396

Oh look, he stole the ATK cookie recipe. Guy is a hack

>> No.10390405

>>10379410
I followed it too, bar cinnamon (Because fuck cinnamon).

How'd you fuck it up so bad?

>> No.10390427

>>10385760
They are all different batches.

>> No.10390504
File: 621 KB, 200x189, 1340821059319.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10390504

>>10390405
>fuck cinnamon

>> No.10390535

>>10379410
You have the hands of a 12 year old.

>> No.10390677
File: 161 KB, 300x150, InfatuatedDecimalHapuka-max-1mb.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10390677

>>10390405
>fuck cinnamon

>> No.10390878
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10390878

>>10379410
Hey OP, look, it can't be a bad recipe, because according this anon >>10390396 he stole a famous one.

>> No.10391047

>>10379410
is it me or does this nigga make damn near everything he can get away with RAW

>> No.10391361

>>10379410
>he failed a cookie recipe
Kids do this shit you absolute loser.

>> No.10391424

>>10390677
i made hummus with a pinch of cinnamon today and it was fucking delicious.

the chickpeas were a little on the hard side and i had no blender. that sucked. but the almighty fork helped me. some salt, oil, paprika, garlic, too. i prefer less oil in my hummus, but it was still a whole lot.

>> No.10391622

>>10391361
OP is a kid

>> No.10391768

>>10379538
it's not that bad. I'd eat in a heartbeat, i love messy chocolate chip

>> No.10391777

>>10390247
>he doesn't want to be spooned to sleep by a big italian daddy
you must be gay

>> No.10391809

>>10379435
>line chef
he literally majored in film before this shit, he's researching the food part up as he goes along. His only skill is "good" presentation where he's completely outclassed by Jun .

>> No.10391934

>>10379410
I made these, they were really good. They turned into brownies, but that's exactly how I like them.
I think you're just retarded.
Did you let them sit in the fridge for a few days? I did, they were really good.

>> No.10391953
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10391953

>>10391934
>try to bake cookies
>they turn into brownies
>has the gall to call other people retarded
This board is absolutely hilarious. I'm literally howling right now.

>> No.10392162
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10392162

>>10391953
>Make an entire holidays meal for 7 people by myself with no profession cooking experience or education beyond Binging with Babish and Food Wishes
>Am poor, so I have to hand-mix bread, pie, and cookie dough
>Everything turns out perfect, except for the cookies
They were fucking delicious, the problem was that I put too many on the same pan because I didn't have time to autistically organize everything while entertaining guests.
I asked my girlfriend what she thought about the meal as a whole, and she told me that the cookies were her favorite.
And so, in conclusion, go fuck yourself. I like Binging with Babish, and I think that you're all being snobby cunts.

>> No.10392175

>>10391953
But the full moon is a couple nights past.

>> No.10392201

>>10379410
You are a fucking retard.

>> No.10392315
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10392315

>>10392162
>education beyond Binging with Babish and Food Wishes
>considers binging with babish an "education"
Stop, I can barely breathe.

>> No.10392442

>>10392315
>what is reading comprehension
I literally said "no professional cooking experience or education"
The "beyond" in that sentence implies that what education I do have in the subject isn't anything resembling real education.

>> No.10392445
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10392445

>>10392442
>damage control

>> No.10392520
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10392520

>>10392445
I had leftover dough from the batch that I baked on Easter. These are going to a few friends who weren't able to come.
When properly placed, the don't turn into brownies. I still don't know why they flattened out so much though.

>> No.10392537
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10392537

>>10392445
Also, do you think that you could offer constructive criticism or advice instead of being a dick?
I like how these taste, the problem is that they look awful.
This half of the dough got unlucky with the chocolate chips too, the first baking had most of the chunks because I was afraid of over mixing the dough.

>> No.10392545

>>10379472
those cookes like like shit

>> No.10392577
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10392577

>>10392537
Try more butter and less flour next time rofl

>> No.10392669

>>10392577
Thanks, I'll try it.
Personally, I thought I was using too much butter.
Also, would baking powder or soda make them puff up more? I like taller, softer cookies more than flat, crunchy ones.

>> No.10392679
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10392679

>>10392669
>puff up more
So you were aiming for brownies in the first place?

>> No.10392781

>>10392679
fuck off you nigger

>> No.10392815

>>10379410
His mad men french toast actually isn't terrible. that being said it's literally just french toast and whipped cream spiked with the right amount of dark rum so any retard can pull that off, but still tasty.

>> No.10392820

>>10386629
forgetting that 1. belongs to my boy jun

>> No.10392832

>>10379410
It took you all night to brown some butter and you want me to believe the fault lies with anyone but you?