/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>9964409
Ass, but I always chicken out

>genitals.jpg

>>9964409
This is an interesting way to declare war on canada

Hornbill, but they probably taste bad like other predatory birds.

>>9964409
Human bone marrow.

Would love to try to eat alligator or turtle. I'm also curious about iguanas and other reptiles. I live in northern Europe so that's probably never going to happen.

>>9964427
pusy

>>9964939
Delete this. That's not a snapping turtle thus it doesn't deserve that.

>>9964409
Ass

>>9964409
I've eaten that. I guess it would be good if it was properly prepared but I found it to be very chewy and there was no taste at all. Keep in mind that this was my vegetarian mom who cooked it many years ago.

>>9964939
I've had gator before. It was a burger. It was kind of dry and didn't taste like much. I'd like to try it again as something else. Like a sausage or something.

>>9964409
goose is nice, had it for Christmas. Like turkey but less dry
>inb4 you don't cook your turkey properly
no shit, but I found goose easier to work with

>>9964423
haha xD i do that

>>9964409
Geese are the niggers of the sky.

They can fly but choose to walk across the street.

So many people run them over in Michigan they made it a $300 fine IF they can't prove you intentionally ran them over (in which case its a low misdemeanor animal cruelty).

Fuck geese

>>9964409
Just go shoot one. The federal stamps are like 20 dollars and state license are usually less. They're overpopulated here on the East coast so the state lets us unplug our guns and raises the bag limit to 10 during the Septemeber special season. The flavor is distinct yet mild and there's enough meat on them for a family dinner.

>>9964409
If you want to eat a canadian bird, just hit up a brothel in toronto. Aaaayyyy

I found a recipe for one in a 19th century cookbook too

I’m not even memeing. I want to eat all domesticated animals at some point in my life. If I ever get the chance, I’d eat a cat and post it here for jokes.

>>9964939
fried gator legs are taste like a chicken wing

>>9964939
Turtles are fishy and have this kind of strange gamey chicken-y taste. They make for good soup and it's apparently "good" for you according to the chinks.

>>9966191
Horse is pretty good. Super lean though. Cats don't taste good though since they're strictly carnivores.

>>9964409
One of those fuckers hissed at me at the park once. I got too close I guess. The balls on that fucker.

>>9966191
>eating a living mousetrap

>>9966140
They're 90% feather and bone, what's the point?

Is it tough and chewy?

>>9966273
Nah, look at how plump it is, i bet it's delicious. Have you had quail? That shit is amazing. Having a tiny roasted bird carcass to yourself to pick at is dope.

the recipe i found said it was good too

>>9966289
a little, but in a quite pleasant way if it's been cooked well

>>9964409
Lembas

>>9966310
it's just elf poops

>>9966244
>>9966213
No, I get that. I didn’t say i wanted to eat it for the culinary experience. I just hate cats and the people who deify them.
I’ve eaten dog accidentally already and it wasn’t bad at all. I would suck some dick for the chance to eat a cat.

>>9966289
I've had it in "broodjes" repeatedly. If it's braised thoroughly it will be tender as hell. If it's not, you'd better not have a cap or crown on your canines.

>>9966234
They're a goddamned menace in parts of the US. They don't migrate if the environment agrees with them and they shit xenomorph acid across lawns, parks, and sports-fields. They're over-aggressive as shit and I had to punt them on two separate occasions when they chased me clear into resort cabin and a business office.

I wouldn't weep if they went extinct.

winona ryder . . . if yeah know what i mean ;)

>>9966323
Yeah but you would suck a dick for leisure too, so that's not really that much of a commitment.

>>9964471
I've heard from an ornithological taxidermist that toucan is pleasantly fruity. It seems like they have similar diets to hornbills.

it wouldn't be hard. i could probably find some at some store within an hour.

but i'm so lazy and cheap.

reindeer
I heard its like venison but spicier

>>9966341
lol. youre definitely right about how they defile parks and fields. basically turned this beautiful park into a no-walk zone. every spot was covered in shit.

some kind of deep fried insect, like crickets or larvae.

>>9964409
Goose is just a tougher and drier version of duck. Duck is easy to find.

>>9965471
Unless you wreck one in front of a cop no one will care. Everyone one around here hates them.

>>9964409
fwiw, c.goose tastes fucking awful in most preparations. Way too lean and gamey.

Musk ox
Beluga whale
>>9966680
I disagree

>>9966234

>>9967514
fucking modern dinosaurs fuck

>>9966672
>around here
I'd bet everyone hates those little shits in every place they congregate.
One of them bit me when I was a kid, we've been sworn enemies since.

>>9968372
I'm confused do you mean Doritos or rollie pollie ollie?

>>9968386
Doritos obviously. Why would I want to eat a Giant Isopod?

>>9967514
hahah

canada goose fucking with a zoo elephant:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6ZHvNDvHd8

if we dumped them in africa would they take over the continent?

>>9964409
dem bir rayciss

>>9966543
there's a few of them in the park by my house

>>9964409
Chicken Beans

I'd like to eat one panda, just for the cruelty of it. Human meat too, but it should be a vegan.

>>9965373
Canada geese are very different from the kind you had at Christmas. There's not much meat on them and they're quite lean.
They're still pretty good eating if you don't overcook them, but they're not the juicy roasted bird you're thinking of.
Better for pan frying than roasting in an oven if you want to try one.

>>9968702
THE EDGE

>>9968711
I know that's edgy, but that's the idea. It's a mix of morbid curiosity and edge.

>>9968702
You have to be 18 or older to post on this board

>>9968702
Wow that's edgy. Also how is eating a panda any more cruel than eating any other animal?

Ferret

They're quite long and a good shape so I imagine you could make a great sausage from one.

>>9970296
They make great FleshLights.

Bear. They're omnivores and apex predators, just like us. That said, I'd have to learn how to field strip a fucking behemoth of an animal to be able to eat one. Also getting the right hunting permit...

>>9970407
>field strip
You don't REALLY do much hunting, do you?

>>9968745
They’re dying out despite humans trying really hard to get them to bone more often and having literally no predators.

>>9968511
In case you didn't know, according to the Audubon Society's book on North American Birds, the Canadian Goose's call is described in the English context as follows: Honk-a-lonk.
So next time you hear em, call out to them.

Steller's sea cow, a sirenian species the size of a small whale

It was hunted to extinction in the 1700's less than 40 years after its initial discovery, apparently because it was 1. slow and easy to catch, and 2. fucking delicious, with meat described as being 'similar to corned beef'

>>9966289
I love octopus and calamari. Octopus cooked in the right way is divine, tender, and good in just about anything.

>>9966543
Literally just tastes like drier Beef

>>9964939
alligator is alright. nothing too special. if you never end up eating it, youre really not missing much. its very common in the american south; the only place worth visiting there is New Orleans, though.
>>9966191
like previous anon said, good but lean.
>>9966289
if its cooked well, no. very delicate, briny flavor. im a fan.
>>9966543
bison is good, its a gamey beef. worth the "effort".
>>9966609
had some of these in vietnam from some weird cart. they were fine, you get more of that grilled flavor than anything else.
>>9970407
bear is greasy and not very good. bear jerky is decent but dont expect a nice steak. also what >>9970409 said. assuming youre in america, you dont need a "special permit". it varies state by state, NYS says one bear per season per hunter, you dont even need tags.

for me, its the elephant. the most majestic and i assume most delicious of creatures.

>>9966289
Undercooked squid and octopus is tough and chewy. Overcooked squid and octopus is tough and chewy. When cooked properly, they're tender and delicious.

>>9966543
Ted's Montana Grill is one restaurant I know that incorporates bison into their menu, if you happen to live in a state with a location.

>>9967514
That's a virgin/chad webm right there.

>>9966356
oh I know what you mean anon. she's my jewfu

>>9966356
Fuckin oven dodger

>>9964939
Former Floridian here.

Gator tastes like a slightly alkaline, gamier chicken. It's a solid edible/10.

>>9964409
I saw two Canada gooses mount a swan once and you gotta believe that swan told her friends about it later.

>>9966543
A lot of the bison you find in markets is actually Beefalo, hybridized bison/cattle meat. But it's still breddy gud.
Wild bison is really lean and very tough if not prepared right.

>>9971055
Plenty of places in Louisiana worth visiting for food other than New Orleans. It's difficult to find any decent authentic Cajun food in NOLA being that it's a cesspool for criminals and lost all it's culture after Hurricane Katrina when hipster soyboys looking for cheap real estate forced the best places out. Go to Avoyelles Parish for food then come back with an qualified opinion.

>>9965471
just googled "running over a goose in michigan" you niggas hard as fuck

>>9966356
I'm dating a man now.

>>9964433
Not our bird anymore

>>9966191
>for jokes
Kill yourself.

>>9971027
>five Americans in profile.png

>>9972727
>see lapras in intro
>does not show up in first season
>only first season had been syndicated at that time

>>9972745
Yes it does...an NPC gives you one, you tard.

>>9972749
He's talking about the anime, newfag.

>>9972758
How does that at all make me a newfag for misunderstanding what he meant? Retard.

>>9972763
The term "season" is never used in reference to video games unless you were born in the 00's and grew up with season passes and episodic video games. Your not knowing the first season intro is further indication toward this. Since we are living in the year 2018 of our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ, you must be a newfag, unless you are willing to admit you've been (and maybe still are) posting here underage.

>>9972749
>season

>>9972768
It's 5 in the morning and I haven't slept in almost 4 days. I don't give a shit what you have to say right now.

>>9968702
>>9970482

>>9972772
Nice reasoning, enjoy your ban.

>>9972780

>>9970482
>>9972773

https://pastebin.com/rdPRfZ8J

already comes with leek

>>9966543
Im from the western side of the U.S and bison is super common here if you know where to look. Its basically beef but a bit more gamey, so you have to know what to pair it with to make it something special. People usually mix their bison with blue cheese so if you hate blue cheese you might be S.O.L if you dont wanna make it yourself.

>>9966140
I'd fucking shoot you

>>9972854
Farfetchd is the Hatsune Miku of Pokémon I guess

>>9965517
I've never gone hunting before but have always wanted to. What's a good gun for goose hunting? The only long arm I have right now is a rossi r92 in .357

>>9964409
I can order some pastirma from camel meat but I'm not sure if I should

>>9966289
>>9971039
I'm cooking octopus tonight, actually. I was told to boil it for like two or three hours before putting it in the pan. Is that the right way?

>>9968702
This, but unironically. If I could try any one meat in the world, no questions asked, no consequences, it would be human.

I like trying as many different animals as possible. If there's a meat I've never tried on a menu, that's what I get no question. I don't travel or explore enough to have had anything really exotic yet though.

>>9972771
Sorry. The first cour

>>9972622
yeah, no shit. theres plenty of places in the american southeast that are well worth visiting for food; if youre an american, its not terribly inconvenient. but if im flying 10+ hours (anon is north euro) just to get to america, i sure as shit am not driving another 6+ hours just to get to beauregards shrimp shack.

>>9973218
test after 1.5 hours. ive heard 1-2hrs, so just keep an eye on it. im sure itll be fine.

>>9966209
According to the chinks everything that is not normal food makes your dick stronger

Where in US could you even find it?

>>9966356
Oven dodger

>>9973208
best bet is gonna be a 12 gauge. youll probably use like 3 inch waterfowl loads. read up on your regulations b4 though

>>9966292
look up kiwi anatomy
more than half their body is built to hold their eggs

>>9964409
I've eaten on they taste like trash don't bother.
Now goose and duck on the other hand.

>>9976226
OP posted a goose dude.

>>9966323
Come to Canada the fucking cats are everywhere as the shit head owners let them loose and they wreck the local squirrel and bird pop.

>>9966371
>soy boy hipster beer drinker baby cat owner.

>>9968380
Imagine being such a pussy a Canadian bird that shits all day is enough to scare modern soy boi.
Oh laffing.

>>9970407
Found the wanna be tough guy right here.
Black bear are pussies and grizzly is easy to kill.
You don't field strip a quarry you clean it.

>>9973247
Beauregards shrimp shack sounds like a good place to get shot by a redneck anyways

>>9973208
I've heard of people successfulness hunting them by baiting them with vodka soaked grain like corn. Quote, "just walk up to them drunk on the ground and ring their necks." Super fucking illegal though.
Legally should be using some size of shot with a 12 guage. Punt gun if you're a mad man.

I've had goose jerky before. Pretty good really, much more tender than other types of jerky I've had.

>>9966543

Half the restaurants in my state have a bison burger on the menu.

>>9968649

Who knew the Canadian goose was the black man's natural predator?

>>9973208
They're not difficult to hunt. They're fearless, so sometimes you can just walk up to one and grab it.
If your aim is good you can probably hunt them with a .177 air rifle, although I wouldn't personally. A .22 LR into the head should be fine, though.
What little hunting I do is with a 55-lb recurve bow. You can definitely kill a goose with one of those, and the fearlessness I mentioned earlier makes it pretty easy to get close enough.

Shotguns should go without saying.

>>9976876
They're mean enough sober. I'm not sure I want to get one drunk.

>>9964939
That is a chicken turtle

>>9978599
>probably hunt them with a .177 air rifle
Yeah, I didn't hunt one with it but I shot one in the head who was being a destructive asshole and it killed it. Fwiw, body shots did nothing because I tried to warn him away with those and it was like water off his back. Those fuckers are tough assholes.

>>9973208
I have a Stoeger 3500 in 12ga for geese and duck. Federal law requires you use non toxic shot for waterfowl so anything smaller than 12ga is generally discouraged. Any good pump or auto 12ga shotgun is general is fine so long as you practice with with game loads.

>>9966323
>I just hate cats and the people who deify them
bugguy we know it's you

>>9978514
there was a big bison craze like ten-fifteen years ago, but it's mostly died down here (seattle) but still fairly common to see a bison burger on a menu and you can get the meat at Fred meyer

>>9965517
>using a plug
>ever

>>9981416
>breaking the law
>when the wood jews might be watching
I hate flying niggers as much as the next guy but I swear the gamewardens around here hide in the trees. It's not worth the risk.

>>9981433
I've hunted from 13 to current (32) and never once encountered DNR.

I rarely see them in their pickups, Like once a year. But they have never stopped me and I've never seen them in the woods.

I've never plugged any gun I own while hunting. I'll play dumb, But I won't play cuck.

I'll take the $80 dollar fine

>>9981451
Strange I see the forrest jews pretty much every time i go hunting. They like to camp out in the access lots and badger people coming back from hunts. They also like to pop out of the bushes seemingly at random.
Also, an unplugged gun is a misdemeanor in my state so it's not worth it for me. I'd eat the $50 fine for not having enough orange on or something but I don't want to go to court over an extra two rounds in the tube.

>>9972486
GOOSED.com

7>>9964415
just don't get with a filthy fucking girl
i've never been with one that wasn't cleaner than my dishes straight out of the dishwasher down there

>>9966323
If you ever end up in Lamezia, head to a mountain village called Acquafredda. Theres a shitton of feral cats and no one there will give a shit about you shooting during the day on the streets. Also, say high to Luigi and Ida, in the orange house on the way up.

Wolves
I do mind eating dogs
Even live in kor

But i would like to eat wolves
They are not friendly animals
But similar with doggos

>>9983002
I hope you come to this country and get devoured by a roving pack of wolves or wild dogs.

>>9970482
The Luke Skywalker of the animal world

>>9964409
They are supposed to be really tasty.

>>9984168
They were apparently so tasty that they weren't able to bring one back to England for like 100 years because sailors kept eating them in route.

>>9984174
Imagine you're stuck on a 90 foot long wooden ship for months with 70 people living off hardtack, canned meat, funky smelling rainwater, and diluted rum

I think you'd probably think human meat was tasty after a few weeks

>>9984185
There are probably only at most 1000 europeans and americans alive today who would be mentally and physically capable of manning a 19th century sailing ship under the same conditions as they did and rounding the Cape of Good Hope after departing London.

>>9967514
The virgin cow
versus
The Chad goose

>>9966292
>>9966140
gibbe recipe pl0x

>>9964409
old dude i work with said he used to eat them, greasy like a duck, but edible

>>9976275
>t.neuhunt
Field dress a mammal or foul. You clean fish

>>9970407
You field strip your weapon anon, not your quarry

>>9986169
I field strip your mom before going to town on her hairy meatpie

>>9978599
You have never actually hunted a goose have you. You shot at a pest of a domesticated pet. Geese in the wild are not that fearless. They have eyes like hawks and readily avoid you if you are not well camouflaged. They will not land next to you without reason either. And good getting close to a group on the ground to shoot it with an air rifle. Again this goes for non pet Canada geese. The ones in the sewage drain behind your section 8 apartment complex don’t count Jamal.

>>9986178
I don’t imagine that’s a real good idea, she’s coming right up on 60

>>9986210
Let's just say I like my meat "wet aged" if you catch my drift

>>9973232
human flesh tastes like a mild pork. Or should I say that pork tastes like people? don't do it, it ruins the experience.

>>9976257
>t. guy who actually would suck a dick

>>9974356
Is that a finch? If so they're protected as songbirds in most states but I don't think anyone would mind if you popped one with pellet gun or something.

>>9971027
>hunted to extinction in 40 years

how many of them were there? 10?

>>9970407
My neighbor gave me bear sausage once. I wanted to try it, but it smelled foul. Like wet dog and blood.

>>9964409
I eat goose all the time. Best cooked on the grill wrapped in bacon

>>9986526
More than 10, but considering their size and diet, their environment couldn't have supported a large number.

>>9986537
Predator meat tends not to smell or taste that good. Bear is overrated imho.

I'll probably have it *eventually*, but there's an intriguing mutton recipe I found in a Czech cookbook, but I can't find goddamn mutton anywhere.

>>9964941
lol'd

>>9973152
Hahaha! :D

>>9964977
my brother

>>9986572
Now why is that exactly? I find that interesting since the fish we eat are predators.

>>9964423
>amouse bouche.jay peg

>>9976467
AUS HACKEPETER WIRD KACKE SPÄTER

>>9972773
o i am laffin

>>9967514
Does the goose have a legitimate forcefield?

>>9964415
I did it to my ex. She was a huge asshole, so it was hard to avoid. It took me a while to convince myself, but it was fun once I tried it.

>>9964939
>Would love to try to eat alligator or turtle. I'm also curious about iguanas and other reptiles. I live in northern Europe so that's probably never going to happen.

while fresh or homemade is always better, snapper soup can be had in a can..... this brand comes from a restaurant in philly, but i'm sure there are others out there

>>9964409
I've eaten a lot of canada goose. Its got a texture similar to beef. you have to cook it ultra rare or braise it. Works good in chili. Snow goose is vastly superior.

Dying to eat one of these mola-mola
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYUgduOeXuA

>>9964939
alligator is chicken but better, fuck these responses

>>9988730
Allegedly, they smell incredibly awful.

>>9988730
Boston needs to be nuked

>>9984577
Would the penis be the tail?

>>9984577
>hands marked as stew meat
Probably some of the most tender meat on a person. But I guess the edgy teenager who made this just half-assedly compared a picture of a person to one of a pig.

>>9964939
I tried alligator, it's disgusting. It basically tastes like a cross between fish and chicken. Imagine the taste of fish, but with the texture of chicken. It's gross.

>>9964415
When I was with my first proper girlfriend I was so into eating her out once that I just started violently licking and sticking my tongue into her ass and pushing my nose into her pussy without warning. It only happened once and she never talked to me about it, but after we broke up (and sort of stayed friends) our mutual friends would always make comments suggesting that they knew about it, so I'm guessing she talked to them about it.

>>9981604
>>9987860
>>9990027
I dunno lads, im hardly a germaphobe but perhaps some things are better left a fantasy. Sure, maybe if she had an enema and jumped straight out of the shower, but thats one way to kill the mood.

>>9964423
Don't let your dreams stay memes
Go to the store and get some, pair it with some bleach.

>>9964939
Gator really is like rubbery chicken honestly, might be the kind I got through, some in a canned sampler with bear and rattlesnake meat and one other I don't remember
I just remembered the snake had fuck tons of bones to pick out like little fish bones but a thousand of them, was well seasoned once it was just the meat though

>>9966191
I know in Sweden they eat horse no issues
I have a recipe for horse tar tar that got me slapped by some horse rider chick at my old job

>>9966323
What exactly is preventing you from going to a pet store or ASPCA and making it a reality? If you aren't a retarded edgelord that can't do it without posting here for attention you easily could make it happen and have nobody find out about it, hell you can even control it's diet for a month or two to be sure the meat tastes as good as possible. Fact is you can't adopt at your age and you know even when you can you won't be able to resist posting here bragging about it and you would be arrested so you just fantasize

>>9966543
Leaner beef like buy 90/10 ground beef and that's the same experience and flavor

>>9986598
Mutton is damn good like goat a little fattier but has lots of flavor finding the meat in middle America is tough though

>>9992192
Can't fool me, you slimy Australian.

>>9964409

>>9973208
Just wear a hockey mask and long sleeves and take a big stick. Nothing like a good goose bash.

>>9986571

Not to mention it was at a time when whaling was at an all time high. It's not surprising that such a species didn't survive that.

swan

>>9964415
If she's clean it's amazing, especially if it's into it, but you really have to make sure she is pristine or things get ugly really quick

>>9973208
12 ga and some decoys and a goose call over a pond in the AM, or a field in the late morning. There is not much that is more satisfying than calling in a flock of geese and then blowing them the fuck out of the sky.

>>9986193
this. They are crafty little fuckers.

I hunt them in a field near my house with a compound bow. I can call them in and get them to come down to within 30 yards of the field to check out my dozen homemade plywood silhouette decoys, but they refuse to land.

So, I made a bunch of bludgeon tips on old arrows - i drilled holes in golf balls and then epoxy them to the tip of the arrow. The goose comes in to about 30 yards and starts to circle to decide if they are going to land. I set up along a riverbed that is also a wind tunnel - this creates my opportunity. they get hung up in the stiff breeze and are basically suspended in mid-air, perfectly still for about a second. just enough time to fire a golf-ball tipped arrow at them. If i miss, nothing happens and i go pick up the arrow. If i hit it, it's coming down, and then i have to stop on it's head.

barbaric, yes, but I used to shoot regular arrows into them and the goose would just fly away with my $5 arrow sticking out of it.

>>9989543
Not everyone from Boston is like that

>>9986193
>>9993247

>Again this goes for non pet Canada geese.
Are there really people who keep those things as pets?
Yes, I have hunted them and since I live in Denmark I've usually been limited to a bow.
Maybe some geese in some areas of the world are just more fearless than others? I mean, I've seen gulls that would walk right up to people and beg for food but I've also seen some that didn't go anywhere near people because they probably knew they were disliked.
It's a pretty big planet and Canada geese, despite the name, get around.
Might try that thing with the golf balls, though.

>>9987838
The slow horn penetrates the shield.

>>9994298
the golf ball thing works great, byt you will have to dial in the sights on your bow to adjust for the heavy ball. It's awesome when they hit. The goose drops like a stone and then does this cartwheel tumble. I'm shooting out of a high powered compound bow with an 80 lb draw.

>>9989736
>edgy teenager helped make the movie The Texas Chainsaw Massacre

>>9964409
Man, where I work has a ton of them. I see what they eat and swim in. I wouldn't want to eat that.

>>9967514
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PNAOORJlCZY

>>9994608
I guess you don't eat lobster either.
Or pork.

>>9964939
Alligator or crocodile is like really dense chicken, and I can get it at my local swedish supermarket so you probably haven't looked properly.

>>9966191
Horse tastes really nutty and I cant say that I recommend it, and if you want to eat cat go to Switzerland for Christmas, fried cat is a traditional Christmas meal there.

>>9972481
Bear isn't that special to be honest, nor is it's sea equivalent wale, which is dry as sawdust.

>>9973208
to hunt those monsters you need one of these!