/ck/ - Food & Cooking

On toast with mayo

deenz is the lowest of forced memes in existence, give up

>skinless deboned sardines

>>9866687
Does everything have to be a meme? Can a man not share his appreciation for no longer being hungry, thanks to a humble little can of sardines?

>>9866707
Careful or you'll become a meme. Just let it meme away.

>>9866669
Out of the can without any changes. Extra spine.

>>9866669
Can you actually eat the bones?

>>9866778
Yeah it's like quail

>>9866761
this, the bones are the best part

>>9866778
you'd be amiss not to (calcium, bro)

>>9866807
gotta get all that mercury in the bones too

If you eat them whole out of a can I assume they don't remove the skin or innards. Doesn't that mean you're getting mouthfuls of sardine shit in every bite?

>>9866778
The spine is the best part and has a remarkable amount of nutrition. Lesser brands sometimes have prickly ribs though, edible but tickly.

>>9866817
Sardines have some of the lowest levels of commercial fish. They're towards the bottom of the food chain.
>>9866818
The innards are removed. The skin and bones remain, unless otherwise stated.

>>9866778
This is the only thing holding me back. I bought some on a whim... I forget what kind, but they have bones in them. Usually wouldn't bother me on some other animals, but canned sardines with little bones in them just turns me off for some reason. Other than that, I feel like I'd love these fuckers and eat them fairly often for a quick snack and for nutritional qualities that I usually wouldn't get. Any suggestions for good, boneless brands? Or is there usually a dropoff in quality if they're deboned?

>>9866693
Yea, you might as well just eat tuna.

>>9867411
They're not very noticeable. Even anchovy bones are more obtrusive. If the bones are a really big deterrent for you try the extra small versions. They're usually called "brisling" and their bones are even less noticeable, to the point you can hardly detect them. King Oscar (pic related) is a very reliable brand.

>>9867543
Thanks bud. I know once I try even the regular ones, the bones probably won't bother me. Just for some reason these little fuckers turn me off.

Pic related are the ones I bought on a whim at Dollar Tree. I figure they last a long time and are nutritious, so not bad to have a few of in my pantry, but wasn't sure about the brand. Anyone have an opinion on these? I'll try them tomorrow and see if I like them, but would be curious if they're known to be shitty or not relative to other brands.

I don't like the idea of eating cold or room temperature fish, any tips on cooking these?

king oscar sardines with jalapenos, aww yeah. i eat them with a couple of saltines. perfect.

http://mouth-full-of-sardines.blogspot.com/p/sardine-list.html

A good resource for people who both enjoy sardines and are slightly autistic.

Anyone know where to get cheap sardines? I hate beach cliff, bumble bee, chicken of the sea, it's all the same mushy trash. King Oscar and other actual sardines are amazing but $3 a can is fucking crazy.

>>9867638
>tfw you will never be as passionate about anything as this guy is about canned sardines

>>9867603
Just keep it simple. Cook them in a pan with a small amount of the oil they come packed in. Add some soy sauce, green onions and chili sauce. Serve over rice.

>>9867817
look for the 15 oz oval tins, should be under $2, you may have to go to an ethnic store, go asian, as the hispanic ones are dangerous

Give me some more quick recipes please

>>9866669
I like these much more for that specific reason.
Stick it on a burner for a few minutes and toss it on fresh rice, shits great.

>>9866669
I see your sardines and raise you sprats

>>9867817
Brunswick from Canada are good I think, we don't get many other brands in Australia

I like dipping them in brown mustard

>>9867411
I just open each one down the middle with my fingers, and pull out the spine. Comes out in one piece. I'm sure it's fine but it's a textural thing for me.

It's not too difficult to debone these anon, don't deprive yourself of sardine goodness

>>9867574
beach cliff is standard poor sardine fare but they're absolutely fine. I think King Oscar is by far the best, but usually Beach Cliff is where the wallet wants to be.

>>9866669
/ck/ how do I get into sardines if I don't like fish all that much I have a shit ton of them in the pantry

>>9868036
Eat with crackers and they're fine
They don't taste like fish at all they kinda taste like a less flavorful smoked oyster

>>9868042
I don't like oysters either, it's been a family tradition to eat them for years and I don't like them despite trying throughout my childhood and teenage years to enjoy them

Help

>>9868045
Have you tried sardines at all or are you just assuming they won't agree with you?

>>9868036
Honestly, I would try getting a taste for white fish first and then move onto oilier fish like sardines.

>>9867974
>>9868026
thx babes

>>9868067
eat one with the bones in just to try it, I assure you the bones melt in your mouth, it is no big deal with tiny fish

>>9867574
Those are by far the shittiest brand. Also the cheapest

Does anyone like canned mackerel?

>>9867958
reported.

>>9866817
Sigh. You would have to be pregnant in the first 2 months and eating fish with every meal with an extra side of fish paste and drink only ocean water for several years before mercury in your food would even begin to effect you.

It was sensationalized in 2004 by a single article aimed directly at pregnant women and never lost traction. It's a made up fear essentially.

>>9867574
They're ok. Never tried with mustard sauce.. Alway got the ones packed in oil or water which I drain of and then fill with vinegar and hot sauce.

>>9868369
Yes made into patties and fried serviced with potato/corn/onion hash using ketchup as a dipping sauce because that's how mama used to make before she had worms crawling out of her pussy

Whoever invented these tomato sardines or whatever that trash is should be killed

>>9866669
I like to keep little tins of anchovies around for snacking.

I've been eating these awhile and never noticed the bones? I've had a bunch of different brands too

Do you eat the bones also?

>>9868787
Eat them with some pico on saltines

>>9866669
I usually just eat them right out of the can with a little salt. The chopped onion never occurred to me but I will def try that next time.

>>9867638
This dude has done the research.

>>9867636

This is the GOAT. Throw some spicy brown mustard on those bad boys and that is all you need.

>>9866669
>chopped onion
Why would you do that to your asshole?
Literally what is the appeal to ingesting tiny little chunks of undigestible plant matter? You might as well swallow a handful of birdshot. I fucking hate any restaurant that ruins food with little chunks of onions that way. Only thing worse is maybe seeds.

When I was a kid I used to just chomp through these like a cartoon but nowadays I find the bones are massive and I'm not sure if they're just bigger now or if my teeth were stronger.

Having to actually bone a sardine is a task I would only give to my enemies, so I haven't eaten them in years.

>>9870072
>You might as well swallow a handful of birdshot
>I doesn't eat birdshot as a colonic cleanser

Cityslicker detected.

>>9870072
Next time you have an onion try slicing it as thin as you humanly can. Choke up on your knife, put a lot of pressure and go very slowly, if you can see-through the slice then that's thin enough.

If you try tasting that you'll notice it's not so aggressive and is a little sweet.

>>9870088
It's not even that it's a case of having one painful shit, the issue is those little pieces of non-food tear through you only a couple at a time, so you're up the entire night running back and forth to the toilet not sure if just a single piece of onion is trying to come out or if a massive torrent of diarrhea is suddenly going to happen in response to those thousand little cuts of intestinal irritation. So you either are too conservative and straining over nothing or you're too lax and end up shitting the bed. Serving tiny little chunks of undigestible "food" like onions or seeds is possibly the cruelest thing you can do to another human being.

>>9870072
>Why would you do that to your asshole? Literally what is the appeal to ingesting tiny little chunks of undigestible plant matter? You might as well swallow a handful of birdshot. I fucking hate any restaurant that ruins food with little chunks of onions that way. Only thing worse is maybe seeds.
What ARE you??!

>>9870102
>not so aggressive and is a little sweet
There's nothing wrong with the flavor of onions, it's the way they totally do not get digested the way a normal food like turkey meat would. Which I guess is also something you could at least mitigate through extremely thin slicing, but I've tried excessively chewing stuff like onion in the past to try to break it down enough to get digested and it still doesn't work anywhere near well enough for me to ever try it again.

>>9870072
>He can't digest onion
what

>>9870105
wtf is wrong with your ass man

>Individuals sensitive to these antibacterial properties might have difficulty digesting onions
What kind of pansy, soy-fed asshole can't digest onions? Fucking hell.

>>9870112
I don't understand your question. Don't pretend like this isn't a real issue if that's what you're getting at, maybe you have some magic invulnerable GI tract that obfuscates all this trouble from you, but your intestines don't stay that way forever and that is a horrible food idea to serve to an older guy with diverticulitis.

>>9870128
>an older guy with diverticulitis.
There it is. You obviously understood well enough to give the answer. Here's what Livestrong says about your homosexually weak tract, gramps:

>Inlulin is a fiber present in onions. Inulin is a beneficial food source for the healthy bacteria in your intestines. Consuming inlulin allows your body to maintain healthy levels of good bacteria. The presence of good bacteria promotes regular bowel movements. The thiosulfinates in onions also have antibacterial properties that can cause harm to these same beneficial bacteria. Individuals sensitive to these antibacterial properties might have difficulty digesting foods after they eat onions, especially raw onions.

>>9870139
Homosexuals eat vegetables all the time, learning to unnaturally tolerate a "food" that nets you fewer calories by passing through you undigested isn't something to be proud of.
http://www.gnolls.org/1444/does-meat-rot-in-your-colon-no-what-does-beans-grains-and-vegetables/

>>9870146
Been eating onions my whole life. Raw, in cooking, baked as rings... Dunno what to tell you. I just love them. I'm literally blown away by what I've learned about some people today.

>>9870139
>>9870146
http://roarofwolverine.com/archives/412
>Because I had such an extremely short bowel, my output was very high because no water absorption had taken place. I was fed and hydrated by infusion and could literally live without eating or drinking at all. Because of my excessive output, we had to make a rig that had a hose extending from the ostomy bag that drained into a one gallon jug. Often the hose would get clogged and my wife or sister would have to use a coat hanger wire to unplug it. Now if this vegan pseudoscience is right, we would suspect that the hose was being plugged by pieces of meat.
>Never once did we see any solid chunks of meat. I became so curious about this that I once swallowed the largest chunk of meat I could possibly get down without choking. Because of the shortness of my bowel, it only took about twenty minutes for my stomach to empty into the ostomy. Better than two hours later, there were no signs of any meat chunks. What was always clogging the ostomy tube were pieces of vegetables that were not fully chewed.
>Entire pieces of olive, lettuce, broccoli florets, grains and seeds were found. Yet, large pieces of fat were never witnessed. As a matter of fact, all the fat from the meat was already emulsified by the bile into solution within the duodenum. Over time, fat would coagulate on the side walls of the ostomy bag, but never were there any solid pieces observed. Certainly we are getting a lot more nutrition from our meat than from our vegetables – unless you can chew your cud several times like a ruminant.
Vegetables are not food, they're ways to try to trick you into thinking you ate when you didn't and only get promoted as "healthy" because that's how bad the obesity epidemic has gotten.

>>9870155
http://roarofwolverine.com/archives/412
>No mammal on earth have enzymes that can break down the cellulose from plant cells. Cellulose membranes can only be ruptured through the mechanics of repetitive grinding and the fermentation of bacteria. Human molars are not flat enough to grind plants very effectively and we don’t have the bacteria necessary for fermentation within our stomachs. Who here has never observed whole corn kernels or nuts in their poop? I raise cattle and even in spite of their large flat molars, the ability to chew their food multiple times, and a host of protozoa in their stomachs, I have seen whole corn kernels in their manure. So, how much can a human really get out of whole grains with ridged molars and a nearly sterile stomach?
You're lying if you're claiming to never once have had undigested vegetable matter in your shit. Even actual herbivores don't digest it completely.

>>9870163
Nearly laughed myself to exhaustion. I can't take this.

Well, evidently, some people just have trouble digesting vegetables. It actually seems to be a symptom of a number of disorders.

https://www.everydayhealth.com/specialists/digestive/babyatsky/qa/digesting-fresh-fruits-and-vegetables/index.aspx
>some patients have extreme sensitivity to roughage and cannot tolerate it. Reasons for fiber intolerance include nonulcer dyspepsia; some forms of irritable bowel syndrome, in which high fiber can increase gas production and a feeling of bloating; and a gastric-emptying disorder that prevents the stomach from processing food properly and can lead to feelings of fullness, indigestion, pain, and occasionally, reflux.
>[...] determine whether you have a gastric-emptying disorder that may be treatable with medication or other approaches.
>I recommend eating fruits and vegetables in small amounts to see whether this improves tolerance.

I really like these, but they're not cheap. It's about £1.50 a tin. They're damn good on a salad though.
If I want cheap fish, I'll get mackerel. I got sardines from Aldi once, and they tasted of nothing, and I bit into a spine. Aldi is normally great, but I'm not a fan of their canned goods. Their smoked fish is great though.

>>9870177
>You're lying if you're claiming to never once have had undigested vegetable matter in your shit.
never said anything of the sort. I said I eat onions regularly. As in, several times a week.

Veggies do not disrupt my bowels in any way. In fact, they keep me quite regular. I find it so hard to believe that there would be so many people out there who consume so little plant matter that their bodies literally gave up on producing the necessary digestive materials to help break it down.

Now that I'm recalling... Isn't that exactly how people develop diverticulitis in the first place? By having consumed so little fiber in their lifetimes that their internal flora never developed a defense against it?

>>9867958
what's the difference?

>>9870072
but...onions are delicious

>>9867574
I buy these and the hot sauce ones. same brand. great

>>9870192
Nobody really digests vegetables, at best what you can do is have them sit in your colon and decompose if you have a good amount of the right bacteria to help you with it.
That's exactly why they're promoted as healthy, because they're low calorie AKA low in digestible content. You can't get many calories out of something you're not really digesting. This works OK I guess if you're already so morbidly obese that any calorie reduction will be a good thing for you, but if you haven't been eating at an extremely high caloric surplus for the past decade then the only real benefit vegetables have for you is maybe the potassium you can get out of a V8 drink. If you're not trying to lose weight there's no reason to subject yourself to that kind of intestinal abuse.
>>9870204
>Isn't that exactly how people develop diverticulitis in the first place?
No. Like with pretty much any other GI condition, nobody really knows what does or doesn't contribute to your likelihood of getting it, and you'll see lots of clickbait articles pushing contrarian opinions like "high fiber is actually somehow better for you if your intestines are getting torn up by undigested fiber because of some poorly executed one-off statistics study."
What can't be faked by clickbait popsci is the basic facts of what happens to meat vs. vegetables inside human intestines. If you end up with an ostomy bag one day you will no longer have the luxury of pretending there isn't a massive difference between how real food (meat) gets digested vs. how non-digestible plant matter (vegetables) don't get digested. No amount of papers written will change the basic fact plant matter just doesn't break down in that way inside a human GI tract, best case scenario is it'll rot in your colon effectively enough that you don't notice, maybe because you have an exceptionally great bacterial flora helping you out.

>>9870232
Caloric amounts don't come from fiber. Fiber is measured as a separate nutrient. Calories come from the measurable food energy in every other part of the vegetable (complex sugars, starches and so forth).

> Like with pretty much any other GI condition, nobody really knows what does or doesn't contribute to your likelihood of getting it
Well my sister had gotten it and what they told her was that she had a shitty diet not consisting of nearly enough dietary fiber.

>>9866669
munchies is full of annoying hipsters but this is pretty cool https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wKaARdTHaJY also RIP

>>9870246
It depends on the doctor and what meme they're buying into.
My grandpa got diverticulitis and they told him not to eat high fiber / high residue foods. Seeds are the stereotypical example they give you of what not to eat, though again, there are people who push the exact opposite idea and try to claim you need even more shrapnel to somehow get your intestines used to being torn up.

>>9870267
We'll have to leave this at disagreement but I can assure you, as someone who loves veggies, eats them regularly and far prefers them raw to cooked, that not everyone experiences digestive issues from eating them.

thanks to this thread i might have a gf.
>9:40 PM go out to the store for sardines (store closes at 10pm).
>all they have is king oscar sardines.
>buy at tin and the bitch before me pays with 100 dollar bill for milk and cheetos.
cute girl behind the register is pissed.
>pretend to pay with 100 bill for my sardines
>girl laughs and writes her number on my receipt.
help

>>9870840
nice

>>9870840
You must immediately call her and leave voicemail asking if bb wan sum fug. If you don’t she’ll see you as beta. Trust me. If she picks up hang up

>>9866669
I used to love sardines until I opened a can and took a mouthful of one that was something like 80% grainy roe

The whole of the powdery texture instead of tasty fish put me off for life

How do you gents deal with that?

>>9866669
When i would go on road trips with my grandpa he would make me eat sardines to "get you ready for pussy"

>>9870840
Text her tomorrow/today and ask her if she wants to meet up sometime for lunch. Think casual. It's not a "date" yet. You can do it!

i love sardines but only with rice. plain or on bread just doesnt do it for me.

>>9867574
I prefer the non-flavored version over the mustard.

Sometimes the fish are rather mushy and unpleasant to eat, but other times they are solid, firm and seem to taste better. Unfortunately, they are more likely to be mushy and wanting to fall apart.

I just eat them out of the can. Doing something with them would probably help, since the mushy version needs it.

>>9871764
never happened to me, but if you're concerned about it, I guess you could just inspect each fish for roe before you ate it?

>>9868369
Only you, Phil Collins

>>9866669
One day my dad brought home a full box of sardines in cans of this brand. I was skeptical at first since he told me that this shit was pretty expensive. And damn, I when I tried it, I was a different person. That shit was so fucking good, probably the best sardines I could ever taste.
Too bad these little fishes are this expensive or I would order from them everyday.

>>9870840
The fire of another romance sparked by canned fish.

>>9867638
Damm, he has written discriptions on most of them aswell.

>>9871825
Thats really weird

>>9870840
nice

>>9872285
kek

>>9866669
Canned smoked mackerel is the superior choice anon.

>>9872975
mackerel is too good to eat canned.
kippers are the canned king tho.

These things are blessed

>>9870114
>it's the way they totally do not get digested the way a normal food like turkey meat would.
literally what in the fuck is wrong with you

>>9870105
you unironically probably have a digestive disorder of some type and should seek medical diagnosis

>>9873988
these are god tier too.
herring is very underrated here. avoid the sweet marinated ones tho.

>>9866669
Sardines on pizza is the shit

>>9867817
Do you have a costco? That's where I get mine the brand is wild planet and they are delicious

>>9874625
>>9867817
You can barely see it but the Seasons brand is really cheap and very good despite its price. 6 tins for $5 and sometimes they have the big 24 packs for less than $20.

>>9870163
>Guy just randomly pulls up quotes about a guy who uses a jug as a colostomy bag
>My mom or my sister would have to unclog my shit hose with a coat hanger

>>9870840
Go for it, mate

I had some canned octopus tentacles in tomato sauce that was surprisingly amazing.

OP posted the wrong choice.

>>9872285
Isn't that how the nation of Finland was founded?

>>9867638
Incredible, nice find

>>9866669
>chopped onion
Fucking hell, how much time do you have.

Dessert

>>9876318
what?
it takes like a minute to chop an onion

>>9867636
Kign Oscar is the best, pretty expensive but you want decent sardines go there

>>9866817
good thing you already have brain damage

>>9870105
Do you swallow everything whole?

>>9876318
It takes less time to just grab an onion and chop some of it than it does to open the sardines.

That's a lie but you get the point. Also you can just chop up an entire onion beforehand and keep it ready in a bowl if you know you're going to use it before long.

>>9866669
I bought some of these and they were really fucking good but in the side of the package it said something like
>Contains chemicals known to California to cause birth defects and reproductive damage

What does this mean? Are they talking about the Mercury?

>>9872241
These look top tier as fuck, how can I get them outside of visiting France?

>>9877051
bpa? but that's true for canned food in general

>>9870114
lmfao i've never seen this level of autism before

they're fuckin onions dude. they are there for flavor. nobody eats onions because they're a superfood or anything. jesus christ, if you're being this reductive, then every vegetable is pointless because our stomachs can't fully digest plant fiber.

>excessively chewing onion...to try to break it down enough to get digested

go see a psychiatrist dude, damn.

i'm eating some sardines in mustard sauce with red onion, capers and black pepper right now

shit is so god-tier. 99c per can, can't beat it.

>>9870072
Get the fuck off of /ck/ you child.

>>9877595
Where do you get them that cheap? What brand

>>9877607
chicken of the sea from bi-lo because i'm a poorfaggot. they're actually decent sardines, v mild tasting. i'm sure /ck/ has a reason to hate chicken of the sea, but idgaf.

>>9877583
It's not a psychiatric problem, you don't imagine chunks of undigested onions getting stuck in your ass and keeping you up all night with partial releases of diarrhea.
It's a known problem, onions are poorly absorbed by the small intestine in any human GI tract.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/FODMAP

>>9877635
yeah, i read a little more in the thread about your GI problems.

maybe stop assuming everyone else has diverticulitis. i eat onions on the daily, you jealous faggot. this may come as a surprise to you, but most people who eat onions don't lay awake at night lamenting their broken assholes.

like, what would compel you to take the time to post comments telling people to stop eating onion simply because you can't eat them because of a disorder that only you suffer?

>>9874649
i love season, they're one of my go-to brands. really consistent and tasty. seconding these as a good choice.

>>9870163
>What was always clogging the ostomy tube were pieces of vegetables that were not fully chewed.

> piece of vegetables that were not fully chewed.

Could always just try chewing your food instead of inhaling it like some kind of pig-vacuum cleaner hybrid, Amerifat. I think I have an idea where all your personal health problems are coming from.

>>9877051
they're talking about the BPA leeching

The youtuber Alex French Guy cooking did a 2 part series on economical ways you can be creative with sardines.
You cu/ck/s might appreciate it. The reason I have sardines in my cupboard is because of that guy.

>>9877635
>In any human GI tract
But that's wrong, you fucking retard

>>9877635
You're such a nut, man. What you're talking about there is not normal. This an issue unique to you and other aliens.

And FYI, when normal people eat onions (and other planet matter) the fibers come out mostly digested, not because "they" digested it, but because it's a food source for the bacteria that are supposed to be living in your tract and helping your bowel movements. The bacteria consumes it and then further breaks it down to other waste and nutrients for plants.