/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>9841852
madman

>>9841852
>bag some bell peppers
>do self check out
>try to weigh the peppers
>0.01kg
>Clearly wrong
>redo it
>0.01kg
>redo it AGAIN
>0.01kg
>look around for clerk to fix this problem
>no one around
>decide to go with it anyways
I bought 3 bell peppers for only a few cents!

>shot a man in Reno
>just to watch him die
>had cheeseburgers later

>>9841852
>at self checkout
>everything is onions

>>9841875
Bell peppers are almost always sold by the each.

>>9841887
Not in the frozen north.
They're 5.99/lb

>>9841852
>use coupon
>dont put it in the slot, instead put it back into my pocket for future use

>put 5 lb prime rib in vegetable bag
>put in as red bell peppers

>self checkout machines removed from store

This is your fault

>put a prius in a vegetable bag
>put it in as organic kale

>put vegetables in paper bag
>weight it
>print barcode
>put extra vegetables in the bag later

>serrano's never ring up when I check out
>cashier asks what it is
>?
>enters it as a jalapeno

>>9842462
>>print barcode
What

>at self checkout
>put my item in the bagging area
>checkout keeps saying to place item in the bagging area
>wave over to the supervisor for some help
>she looks at me with this death glare and grumbles as she types in her special code on the machine
why are these bitches always so mad to do their job??

>>9841852
>follow clerk home after closing
>she tells me to stop calling her and following her
>I don't

>>9841875
you're going to hell mate

>>9842484
At Wegmans there's a small scale in the produce section that prints barcodes for vegetable bags so you dont have to look it up at the checkout

>>9843110
I bet there are no "Wegmans" in poor neighborhoods

>>9843120
Cant have nice things when niggers are around, anon

>put 5 pounds potatoes as organic avocadoes
>checkout overseer thinks I’m being extra honest and nods approval
Jokes on them, I had two angus bone in ribeye shoved up my ass

>working in produce warehouse
>boss hands me a roll of stickers for organic oranges
>tells me to stick them on oranges
>the oranges aren't organic
>place stickers on oranges anyway
>sold to supermarket as "organic" oranges
>mfw

>>9843796
Good work, anon. People who buy into 'organic' produce deserve to be ripped off.

>>9843135
hilariously I currently live in a neighborhood with lots of basketball enthusiasts and there's a wegmans, but I grew up in the whitest town in one of the whitest states and there was no wegmans.

>>9843813
I think grocery stores are just a regional thing. Granted I've never seen a Whole Foods in a bad part of town

>who devilish here

>>9843110
European grocery stores all do this. Why this isn't more common in American supermarkets is a mystery.
>inb4 obsessed

>>9843808

Yeah, fuck people supporting traditional farming methods, small scale businesses and combating globalisation.

We should just gas all anglos desu

>put jar of herrings into hoodie pocket to save space
>forget to take it out at the cashier
I DIDN'T MEAN TO, HONEST

>UNEXPECTED ITEM IN BAGGING AREA

>be me
>work as a checkout fag
>customers think they're sneaky putting the wrong stickers on their dried fruits/nuts
>look in bag
>look at sticker
>look at customer
>smile as i scan the shit and put it in the bag

fuck you coles

>>9841852
fucking loved that game when i was a kid

>>9844620
except 9/10 your not supporting anything. It's usually just as anon said, a label slapped on non-organic foods. Organic farming loses money because it's an ineffective old method of farming.

Sad but true.

>>9844834
Have you read the grapes of wrath? You don't seem to think it's that sad at all.

>>9842375
There's no way that works

>>9844790
>sabotaging your own paycheck

>>9845647
Cashiers aren't paid commission, you dolt.

>>9843135
Wegmans are shit, lad.

>>9842387
No no no. Youre supposed to do it as BANANAS. Noone buys 5 lb.s of bell pepper that looks suspicious!

>>9843058
desu if shes young i always wanna fuck em

>>9844790
>mannnnn I steal shit from work all the time mannnnn
>mannn why don't the corporations care about us mannnn

>put debit card in chip reader
>Do you want cash back?
>No
>Is [total] correct?
>Yes
>enter pin
>processing ...
>stand around like an idiot as machine hangs
>finally remember you have to hit the card payment button on the machine

>>9841852
>buy 3lb of brussel sprouts
>ring up as cabbage

they're just little cabbages rite

When I was a nervous Nelly, I would just swap bananas and by the each produce and ring them up as each other.

>lime for 15 cents as bananas
>4 lbs of bananas as one lime for 30 cents
>the braindead self checkout goblins would have to look extra carefully to see that there was a difference

>Place your....

BANANAS.....

in the bag

>go to self checkout
>instead of checkout out just pick up bags and walk out
>mfw all groceries free

>Buy a few things using the self checkout
>Try to scan a container of cookies from the bakery section
>Try to scan it 3 times but it does not scan
>Just out it in my cart without it scanning
>Get stopped as I am exiting the store
>"Since those cookies are not in a bag we are required to check your receipt "
>Fuck those cookies wont be on it
>She points to the line on the receipt that says turkey
>"Oh this must be it"

To this day I am not sure if she actually believed that or she just did not care.

>buying apples at the self serve and nothing else
>weigh them and it says "please wait for a staff member" and it locks the system
>wait for 5 minutes, no one comes
>take my apples and leave
Fuck the police

>>9845849
lmao you're retarded.

>>9846892
>walk up to a machine
>some dip left the machine hanging without pressing the accept button
>press cancel so now it won't ring through without swiping the card and all that
>move to another machine
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vlEqqnc8y5s

>>9849206
anon's right though, unless they're working in some specialty shop (ie not a grocery store), cashiers are paid an hourly wage and are not rewarded at all for selling more expensive items.

>>9845647
pay stayed exactly the same buddio

>>9846842
nah i dont care about that stuff, im just really lazy. i also used to tie up and bin perfectly fine meat and dairy products that the customers didnt want/couldnt pay for because i didnt want to call up someone to put it back

>>9844822
Dude same. Loved the show n shit too.

>>9844620

>combating globalisation

Why do you hate poor black and brown people anon? You some kind of racist?

>>9847931

>Image of bananas pops up on overhead display for staff to verify

>put avocados in a box of cheerios
>blow the guy next to me

>put my boxes of soda on the bottom of the cart
>have cart full of food and shit
>dont tell the cashier about my soda
>just walk out without paying for them
>if cashier notices just say I forgot I had those down there

>>9850653
There are cameras that can check for things under the cart. You can stand in front of the cart or put your jacket under the cart so it won't show it as a store product (but they can still see if something is on the bottom of it usually). Most cashiers won't really give a shit though.
>I used to be a cashier worked for less than min wage and it fucking sucked

>go grocery shopping
>fill cart with the stuff on my shopping list
>leave the cart in random aisle
>spend money on booze instead

>>9850672
I know but I dont try and make it look sneaky by putting a jacket near it or anything. I just have them there in plain sight and if anyone says something I just say "oh shit lol I forgot I put those there xD" and they believe it

about 70% of the time I end up not paying for them though

>>9845909
Ill fucking kill you if you talk down to wegmans again

>>9849479
based

No it isn't.
America is full of niggers.

>>9845849
My local grocery store actually does pay commission.

>>9843796
>>9843808

jokes on you faggots, i always sniff all my organic fruits to make sure they are organic. also you can tell by eye if veggies are organic. organic fruit smells more fragrant and organic veggies tend to be smaller and look nicer.

organic organic organic organic all the way. enjoy eating your pesticide-covered food.

>>9852957
Commission based on what? What would a pimply faced 19 yr old bag bitch be getting paid commission for? Enlighten me

>>9841893
They're in bags of three for $1 a bag here.

>>9842387
Shit.

Never considered this.

I won't do it because I can't bring myself to be amoral.

So instead I'll just fume with rage, knowing you types of shit heads are out there living it up, passing the cost of your theft and debauchery on to the honest folk.

>>9852980
The pesticides are good for killing my various flesh eating parasites.

The same as preservatives in processed foods will keep me well preserved. :)

>put monster in shopping cart drink holder
>forget it is there
>go through checkout
>realize I didn't pay for it
>do it for 2 more months

Should I try it with a 40?

>enters an onion
>its actually shallots