/ck/ - Food & Cooking

GIMME LIKE UHMM I GUESS ABOUT THREE SANDWICHES WORTH OF LIKE THICK CUT CHICKEN BUT NOT THAT THICK UHMMM KIND OF THIN ENOUGH FOR A SANDWICH UHMM ACTUALLY MAKE THAT HAM AND ONLY FOR ONE PERSON

i typically get proscuitto and corned beef, less than a pound. i think i misspelled proscuitto

I fucking cannot stand deli counters in America, their meat always tastes like cold flavorless pink goop shit and they only sell like weird macaroni salads, you know the type of shit 45 year old women buy at eat at lunch for work

and don't even get me started on the olives.

>>9755973
Let me just grab one of these random packages so I don't have interact with you.
>You are finding everything OK over there?
Actually I am not really hungry. Goodbye.

>>9756003
olives?

>>9756013
Retard?

>>9755973
I'll have two number 9s, a number 9 large, a number 6 with extra dip, a number 7, two number 45s, one with cheese, and a large soda

>>9755973
250 grams of sliced pastrami
250 grams of sliced smoked turkey
150 grams of prosciutto

>>9756003
I forgot to mention, if they do sell sandwiches, they just used the aforementioned gross frozen meat shit with some uncultured milky cheese and shove it between two thin slices of dry, dry, cold """"Italian"""" bread. I also have never once gone into a deli and seen anyone buy a whole turkey or cheese. Not once.

>>9755973
Food
Some

can I get 4 pounds of sweet ham shaved, hun :))))

>>9755973
I don't order from delis because I don't have a clear concept of how much things weigh, despite being 33 years old.

Is 100 grams of cheese a lot? Is 100 grams of ham just a single slice? Fuck man, it's too much stress.

Plus why should be have to interact with the deli operators as if they're some chosen caste who have permission to cut the meat and cheese? It's not skilled work, just leave a knife out and have someone hovering to make sure people don't cut everything to ribbons and leave it a mess. I know how much I want by eye but I can't say 'give me a slice about as big as a deck of cards long and twice as tall'. Fuck man.

>>9756035
wow pure autism in this post

I need like half a pound of fucking turkey.
>we have quite the variety of different turkeys, sir. Which would you like?
HOW THE FUCK SHOULD I KNOW YOU'RE THE DELI WORKER FUCK I CAME HERE FOR TURKEY NOT A QUIZ SHOW DAMN MILLENNIALS MAKING EVERYTHING SO DIFFICULT BACK IN MY DAY A MAN COULD GET TURKEY COLD CUTS WITHOUT BEING INTERROGATED I DIDN'T FIGHT THE ZIPS IN KOREA FOR THIS

>>9756038
t. Divine Deli Caste

>>9756009
At publix, we have the "10 foot 10 second rule", whenever a customer is within 10 feet, or 10 seconds of us, we have 10 seconds to say something like that or else we get written up, and we don't know who's a mystery shopper or not

believe me, I don't wanna do it. There's a running joke in my department that "the fast way to scare off a customer is to say 'Hello'"

>>9756035
it's actually probably easier for the worker if you just say "ill take x slices of cheese" instead of using grams

>>9756045
Just make eye contact, smile and nod your head. I swear policies like yours are written by autists.

>>9756039
Trying too hard.

>>9756057
>nod your head
I'll never understand why white people do this.

>>9756045
I wish there was a store made just for introverts where it's a policy not to initiate conversation with customers.

>>9756062
You've clearly never worked in a deli.

>>9756063
Let me translate; think of it as you yelling at the top of your lungs AYO, LETME HOLLA ATCHU

>>9756057
unfortunately for everyone, it has to be verbal

>>9756064
if I can tell someone's gonna be autistic, I try my best to not initiate contact for as long as possible.
But then you get people who never actually order because they're too afraid to ask. You can't win.

>>9756064
Adult book shops. Probably.

>>9756068
>tfw I wear a GoPro on my head at all times to prevent people from acting rude to me

1 lb. corned beef sliced at a 4
1 lb. Pepperoni sliced at an 9

>>9756062
>capitals and periods
>complains someone is trying to hard
die

>>9755973
I usually buy a couple of steaks, sausages and beef mince.

>>9756019
olives

>>9756091
Mhmm.

>>9756048
It'd be virtually the same. I think most deli workers get an idea of how much constitutes the average request. They always go for ballpark and just ask "bit under/over okay?" I've never once heard someone say no. They'd have to be full autist.

>>9756084
>he doesnt slice everything at a 1
Pleb

1 1/2lb corned beef
1/2lb of prosciutto
1lb Munster cheese

Boar's Head honey-maple turkey is incredible