/ck/ - Food & Cooking

shit.

Throw that on top of some egg noodles and you got a beef stroganoff better than any russian babushka could make

>>9505563
Babushka use actual cut beef not this mince silly western spy, nothing match Babushka's cooking from childhood as smell move out of door into garden where you play with potato until Babushka yell at you for digging in garden again.

>>9505619
kek

>>9505430

"Chicken surprise" was like a couple of chicken breasts, white rice, a bunch cream of mushroom soup, and I think that's it, all set to basically boil/bake in the oven at once.

It actually wasn't the worst thing in the world but it sure wasn't expensive or hard.

>>9505430
Your pic reminds me of the tacos my mom used to make when I was little. Browned ground beef like that, and added just one of those spice packets, that's not the thing that made it different.

What was different was the tortillas. Before I had been born she lived next to a latina woman and they used to cook together, learning from each other.

She would make the tortillas herself, had one of those tortilla press things. But what really made them great was how she cooked the- deep fat frying. I see people do it when they make tostada shells, but they cook them way to long until they get cruncy.

The trick is to fry them for just five seconds or so, either side.

They puff up really well and get nice and hot, but they also stay real soft and fluffy. One of the most delicious things you can ever have is a flour tortilla that's just been quickly deep fried for a few seconds.

>>9505430
I always dump the fat into my chili and it comes out great but that just sounds awful.

>>9505619
Lel

>>9505430
The cheapest box of mac and cheese you can get, then add a can of the cheapest tuna, a can of the cheapest peas. This was my dinner at least three nights a week growing up.
My mother called it a casserole too.
The same woman who called ground beef with no spices added on a taco shell with some salsa a taco.

>>9505430
tomato paste spread on toast and then topped with a slice of American cheese, she called it "pizza on the go"

>>9505430
So...hamburger helper without pasta?

I used to get white bread with butter and sugar. Also tomatoes and sugar.

>>9505619
Good poast

"stuffed hot dogs"

cut hot dog in half length-wise, fill with instant mashed potatoes, place american cheese on top, bake in oven.

>>9505430
fried spam or bologna sandwiches with mayo, sliced tomatoes and onions, edible but gets boring fast, but it was decent currency to trade lunches in middle school

Sunday pot roast with no seasonings other than maybe 1/8th of a teaspoon of salt. Boiled to a gray lump in water with carrots, whole potatoes, and celery.

I asked my mother later on in life why she never used stock or anything resembling seasoning, and she said "it takes away from the flavor of the meat".

>>9505638
I make this all the time. I thought I was the only one that knew about this recipe

>>9505430
Hamburger gravy. Like sausage gravy, but made with ground beef, flour, milk, salt and pepper. And served over toast instead of biscuits. This was for special breakfasts, like Christmas or Easter. Just the thought of it shoots me right back to being five or six years old. But it's not a good dish at all.

>>9505978
What, mac and cheese, tuna, and peas?
How's it taste?

That sounds gross. Mine used to take ground beef and mix it into ones of those $1 boxes of beef rice-a-roni or hamurger helper. I dont eat hamburger helper anymore but I do occasionally have the beef rice. I think I like it with the dirty rice box more though.

can of dinty moore beef stew mixed with a drained can of corn, topped with frozen tater tots and baked.

fuck me but it was my favorite thing growing up.

my grandma would always bake boneless, skinless chicken breasts with pace picante sauce and no other seasoning. loved the fuck outta that, too.

>>9506006
I love it. Put the pees in microwave before you mix them in though

>>9506006
I like mine with tuna too. I've never added peas but they usually go into tuna casserole so it's probably fine.

My grandma would buy us the Velveeta mac and cheese. My parents wouldnt because it cost too much but grandma would get the one with the bacon bits in it. Velveeta mac with tuna, bacon bits, and lots of ground black pepper was my favorite thing for awhile.

>>9505619
best post I've seen on /ck/ in a long time

>>9505430
If my mom was going to cook, she was going to make something good. We were lucky because she was a stay at home mom, so she had plenty of time for it. If for some reason she was short on time that day she would just throw a frozen pizza in the oven or something.

>>9505619
>>>/reddit/

>>9506037
>If my mom was going to cook, she was going to make something good

Same here, but she only cooked for me maybe twice per week due to schedule conflicts. I was alone after school until around 8:30 P.M., so I usually had cooked my own dinner by the time she came home unless we were out of food. I remember being a dramatic little faggot, calling her at work to ask to bring home groceries because "I'm starving to death" despite being fat.

>>9505619
>silly western spy
Best post all year, well memed.

>>9506041
>clever, non-inflammatory OC is automatically "reddit"
>>>/b/

>>9506065
I've been sick of this for years, I guess it'll never end.

>>9506065
>le ebin slav memes
>clever
Come on, they've been played out for a while now. It's already pretty obvious that the over the top praise is mostly samefaggotry as well.

>>9505619

Overrated post

>>9506085
>I've heard this joke before, why are you laughing? It's not funny anymore.
This is you.

>>9505430
meat cream
>jizz

>>9505638
replace a cheap can of tuna with 2 spoonfulls of bacon bits and thats was my college meal.

>>9505633

*Were the tortillas

>>9505638
Sounds like a basic tuna casserole here in flyoverland. My mom made mostly decent food, but everyone once in a while she'd bust out some kooky shit recipe from her mom's old as fuck cookbook.

>>9506088
>I posted an unfunny meme and samefagged a bunch of replies saying how funny I am
This is you

Mostly just frozen fish fingers/chicken nuggets/chicken filets/beef burgers with frozen chips/potato wedges/potato waffles and frozen peas/sweetcorn/greenbeans etc.

>>9506134
Try again, friendo

>>9506144

>>9505430
Can someone explain how that's gross? It seems good to me.

>>9505632
this doesn't sound bad

Mom used to get powdered eggs and add way to much water. She’d boil it, and then add in some ramen noodles for a “homemade egg drop soup”.

Also, she didn’t know how to make meatloaf, so she’d thaw a chub of hamburger meat, coat the entire chub with bread crumbs, and then just bake it as is.

Snacks were usually a can of oysters dumped into a small container of cottage cheese.

Dried fusilli pasta with chopped cheap ham slices and bagged grated cheddar. Add ketchup to taste.

On reflection it's a miracle I'm a remotely competent cook given what I was raised on.

>>9505957
are you me? my grandma always cooks rhe most flavorless trash claiming that people dont like flavorfull food but I know for a fact she can cook and cook well...

>>9505430
My dad used to make pizza with sliced potatos, canned tomato sauce, and muenster cheese. basically whatever we had in the house. at the time i thought it was shit, but we were sort of poorfags, and the poor dude was trying.
i've given that guy so much shit over his cooking abilities (among other things) over the years, but he was just doing his best on top of providing for his family.

fuck, being a father nowadays is suffering.

>>9505949
sounds gross man, what did you think?

>>9506283
Those all sound fucking horrible, but for some reason, I find the "meatloaf" most offensive. Probably because I loved my mom's and make mine similarly to hers. Did your mom ever get better at cooking?

>>9506496
Also meatloaf related, I remembered after my parents separated, and my dad tried to make meatloaf one night because we loved our mom's so much, but he coated it with barbecue sauce instead of ketchup, and I was a little shit, so I refused to eat it after having one bite. Looking back, I feel horrible. It wasn't even bad, just different. Poor dads.

My mom was a really good cook, and yeah, of course she made stuff like Hamburger Helper sometimes, but the years that she had main custody of us (it switched a few times), she was also working as a waitress and dealing with alcoholism and, at one point, an abusive boyfriend, so I ain't mad about a little box meal.

My sister, though, she had custody of my brother and I for a year while our dad was MIA and my mom was getting her shit together, and her husband could cook some things okay, but mostly thought he was Top Chef #1, even though most of his food was bland or over-seasoned/try-hard. My sister, though, would make this horrible thing called Tater Tot Casserole, with tater tots, cream of mushroom soup and ground beef. It doesn't sound that bad, now, but at the time I was like wtf. But I also didn't really start cooking until I turned 18, so you know.

Anyway, thanks for reading my blog. I'm gonna go cry.

>>9505633
Poor mans bunuelos is frying a flour tortilla and toss in it in sugar cinammon mixture.

>>9505430
My grandmother and mother used to make us a dish they just called "milk noodles". If I remember correctly it was just noodles cooked in butter, milk, salt, and pepper added if you liked. I thought it was something we ate because my mom was poor, but it turns out to be some kind of easy Dutch comfort food.

Anyone have experience making it or something similar? I'm an awful cook but I'm getting nostalgic for the taste, I think I might try to make it tonight.

>>9506653
I don’t know, I haven’t talked to her in about a year. Last time I went to visit, she was bragging about some homemade tortillas, but they were thicker than a slice of bread.

She gave me a quid and told me to go get a bag of chips.

My father isn't bitch made to come home to lazy meals. My mother is an amazing cook, she made me like cooking.

My mom right around the time my parents were divorcing made bbq pasta with the different colored noodles. That was... pretty bad

>>9507350
Is that just pasta mixed with bottled bbq sauce?
>fucking gag

>>9505430
Tuna pasta bake with cream of mushroom soup as the sauce and bits of spring onion chopped up in it.
Not even a bad dish, just really fucking simple and easy... and at 30, I still eat it now because it's just so simple and tasty.

Ground beef mixed with Mexican rice, corn and diced potatoes. Cheap but back then it was fucking delish to just eat a pile of it

>>9507160
I'm Dutch and never heard of that, but given our culinary history I am not surprised that shit exists.

>>9505430
my mom did the same thing but she would add a packet of taco seasoning, put it on a tortilla, and call it a taco

or she would add a bottle of chili sauce and call it chili

or she would add barbecue sauce and call it barbecue beef

or she would add red sauce and noodles and call it spaghetti

my mom was a decent cook when she wasnt passed out drunk. those were nights when my sister and i would make tuna mac with peas and weird ramen shitshows, but we were just little kids

>>9505430
Spaghetti with a can of Tomato soup, sometimes with grated cheese.
Its still my all time favorite.

>>9505430
Other than burger helper the laziest meal my mom would make would be buying a "jambalaya" flavored box rice and mixing in beans, kielbasa and shrimp. With a side of canned green beans it was actually pretty tasty, just lazy as fuck.

Even BLTs require more effort than that

>>9505430
I occasionally do that but with lots of canned cream of mushroom soup(thick store brand, name brands are usually watery shit) and throw it over biscuits/toast/homefries/pancakes for breakfast. Tastes good man.

>>9505430
When I was very young, like five or six my younger siblings were picky, and dad wa frequently away on business trips. This meant mom would make meals to feed the kids sometimes that she would NEVER make if dad had been around. Here are a few:

Fried hot dogs, with two perpendicular cuts on each end, so they made kind of a crown shape as they cooked. Served with canned baked beans and homefries, to complete the Depression era vibe.

Sloppy Joes, which were ground beef fried up with onions, then drenched in BBQ sauce and spooned into hamburger buns.

Cold dinner (on hot summer days only), which was any combination of the following: tuna salad, egg salad, cole slaw, macaroni salad, potato salad and (if we were lucky) leftover slices of boiled ham. Served with white bread and pickles.

Casserole of Spam, onion, Ragu sauce, overcooked seashell pasta and green can grated cheese. (I loved this as a kid).

Creamed frizzled dry beef on toast, which was what those in the armed forces call SOS.

Chili, which was basically ground beef fried with onion and bell pepper, then hit with a can of tomatoes and two cans of beans along with the smallest amount of storebought chili powder. Served with white bread instead of corn chips or rice.

>>9505992
Honestly that sounds tasty

>>9505430
>meat cream

God damn, and here I thought Hamburger Helper was lazy. kek

>>9506088
It makes a big difference when a website with a community over-posts a joke which is overused across the internet

Jokes don't exist in a vacuum

>>9505430
Her spaghetti was awful
Other than that my mum cooks great food and I taught her how to cook pasta and sauces properly when I grew up enough to get good at cooking

I used to be hungry all the time, because i was very active, made some money for the family cutting wood, cleaning horse stables, everything really. Eventually my (single) mother said i eat away from the food for my siblings. She said between the three neals i am only allowed to eat food from that board.

There was several kilos of quick oats, a litre of milk and a kilo of sugar. I still eat this almost daily.

>>9507971
I ate one of those mousedeer things in Nam.

>>9508048
I will murder you for that ... shsh ... don't fight ... it'll be over soon

>>9505619
gonna buck trend and call you gay.

>>9505430
corned beef
oxo cubes
onion
beans
tin of tomatoes

served with chips

it was her version of a corned beef hash

>>9506134
>>9506085
Calling everything you don't like reddit is pretty played out too but you fags keep doing it.
>le
irony

>>9505430
Not my mom but when im a dumpa can of green beans in a pot with some cream of mushroom soup. Mix it up until its warm then eat it with hot sauce salt and pepper. Kills the hunger pain for 2$.

Or those 89 cent cans of spegetti. I usually eat it out the can cold. Mixed with hot sauce for flavor.

Most of these aren't even that bad

>>9508301
Yes, cream of mushroom soup with french cut green beans

My mother knew I loved WWF wrestling and used to make 'Onion Rings' as a treat

Basically, she would cut an onion in half, deep fry one whole onion half and coat it in Mayo to represent the 'canvas' then she would stick fries upwards on the corners in the mayo with raw red onion strips threaded through the fries.

She honestly thought it was delicious. I have tried to draw it. The worst part is that she used to serve it at birthday parties and the other kids would always make fun of me for being poor and call me names like 'onion muncher', and would steal my wrestling shirts and smear them with onion juice.

>>9506065
>potato catchphrase
>clever

My mom would take a package of chicken breasts and slowly simmer them in salted water. She'd scoop off all the scum that would rise to the top. Then she'd take a box of Bisquick and mix it with some water, and using two spoons, she'd shape it into small balls and drop them into the water. It would cook for 10-15 minutes, and then she'd get a slotted spoon and scoop an entire chicken breast into a bowl, 3-5 dumplings, and then hit it with a tin of McCormick black pepper. Chicken and dumplings, my friends.

It was the most bland, boring shit. I would absolutely drown it with black pepper and salt to make it edible.

I fucking hate that woman, and disowned her about 12 years ago. Burn in hell, bitch.

>>9505430
My mom used to take spaghetti noodles from the night before and throw it in and fry with eggs.

>>9505619
kek

>>9505430

My mom was actually a pretty good chef, but sometimes she would serve steak strips on plain iceberg lettuce.

>>9507160
I had this when I was a kid. I'm half Asian and back then in the 90s, it was hard as hell to get cream in small Asian towns. When I came to visit my family in East Asia, sometimes I wanted my little serving of pasta and cream, so my mother would substitute the cream with milk, and added a bit of butter and salt. It's basically pasta in a bowl of salted warm milk and a bit of melted butter. In my memory it actually tasted great. I might try it again, I want to make sure it tastes as good as in my memory.

>>9508214
You are actually not wrong, my boyfriend love Babushka's cooking too, make him very happy happy and is good for me too ;)

To this day pic related is my mom's idea of gravy. Thanksgiving and Xmas are not as happy as they could be.

>>9505619
Plate of ham.

>>9505430
My mom did this too but as a sauce for pasta. Good stuff.

When I was a kid we moved to a new town where I didn't know anyone. On Monday nights my mom would either cut up stripes of bologna or make me peanutbutter and crackers with Coca Cola. I'd eat while watching WCW Monday Nitro and for a while, until I met new people, the wrestlers were my friends.

>>9505430
rice with salt

My mom was one of those health freaks who believes salt and flavorings will kill you if i something remotely salty so she buys only no salt broth for cooking and makes every starch filled with bran and fiber. plus i cant count the times she calls blanching some meat as a dish

As expected food is tasteless and gives me the shits

>>9509109
>Was a loser in elementary because my mom never let me watch wrestling.

>>9505430
let's see here...
>cottage cheese, tomato sauce, and tortillas, throw them into a bowl, microwave it, and call it "lasagna"
also
>buy giant package of chicken breasts
>throw them into the oven without any seasoning
>overcook them to shit
>eat 1 or 2 and freeze the rest
>dethaw them and eat them cold in a "salad"
(the salad recipie)
>whole lettuce leaves
>chunks of dethawed overcooked chicken
>whole walnuts and craisins
mac n cheese
>put noodles in croc pot
>cook for 8 hours
>throw it out because it's liquid
>forget and repeat every once in a while
pizza
>buy dough at the store
>spread very unevenly
>make sauce with ranch dressing and garlic
>top with large slices of cheddar cheese and dethawed chicken from earlier recipe
>put entire unspread spoonfuls of costco chopped garlic on top
>cook for like 5 minutes in oven
waffles
>pour pancake mix into waffle iron
salsa verde
>blend raw tomatillos, serve

>>9508785
>>9507160
Isn't that like Mac and Cheese, without the cheese?

>>9505430
We were pretty poor growing up with on and off money due to various reasons, but my mother did have some decent kitchen skills.
She could take whatever we had in the kitchen and make it into a decent meal. My favorite, she would make this thing like a deep-fried hushpuppy/fritter that was jiffy cornbread mixed with sweet onion, garlic, sweet peppers, and spices. It's become a bit of a personal comfort food that I eat anytime I start to feel the depression creeping in. Looked a bit like pic related, but no corn just more peppers and onions.

>>9510657
Stupid fucking clip should have ended when he took the lid off it.

I don't think my mom ever made anything lazy or bad. But being a child eating our cultural food grossed me out. Like steamed cactus leaves.

>>9505619
Hi Boris.

>>9510768
It's shows lazy/stupid people you need to fluff it and that it doesn't need stupid garnishes, or bacon or whatever. Other people can just use Google for their instructions.

The video length was justified.

>>9505632
My mom used to make the exact same thing, sometimes she would put some cheese on top too

>>9506051

>>9505992
That's call SOS. Or shit on a shingle, if you prefer.

Ramen with cheese. ;__;

>>9510031
was ur mum a drug addict?

>>9505430
Nothing, mother carried all of my grandmother's recipes over from the old country.

Neighbor though couldn't cook from scratch for shit.
>Hung out with most likely autistic family
>Oldest has anger issues, reads bleach/one piece and would shake and stare when mad
>Middle wore diapers until about 14
>Youngest seemed to be the most alright out of the three, babysat him a few times

>Autismother cooks everything from a can/box/bottle
>Bowtie pasta, mushroom soup, and precooked chicken cassorole 40% of the time
>Mac and cheese the other 40%
>Last 20% is chicken tenders and pizza bagels

Only reason I went to their house other than they were spoiled and had every game system and a 8x10 room that had 4 TVs and those 'high end' gaming laptops.

>>9505430
Put half a jar of salsa in a bowl. Add half a can of drained black beans. Microwave for a minute or two. Proceed to enjoy your "chili".

>>9505632
my dad did this alot. it was meh. never enough spices.

>>9510031
I laughed out loud at the Mac n cheese.

>>9508383
This post gives me so many mixed emotions

>>9505430
https://youtu.be/QetqsAjsPv8

can't get lazier than this senpai

>>9513624
No, she was a liberated woman of the workplace

>>9508977
Cream of mushroom makes great gravy

>>9505430
She didn't cook much. Here are some I remember though.

>fish soup
>just throw a whole unprepped fish in there
>the whole soup is a murky, disgusting mess
>only joy was siblings daring each other to eat the head

>summer soup
>raw vegetables in lukewarm milk
>get put off by zucchini for years

>cabbage stew
>get food poisoning

>salmon casserole
>again, everything is fucking raw
>raw potatoes in warm cream
>furious because salmon is fucking expensive

>some sort of chicken dish
>so much rosemary that it's inedible
>why.jpg

The only edible things she could consistently make were pizza, spaghetti with tuna and macaroni casserole.

>>9505632

Chicken Supreme, legit.

>>9505632
My mum used to put stove top stuffing over all of that

>>9505430
Cereal with water for dinner.

Sometimes she would heat up the water.