/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>9035726
if plating your food ever requires TWEEZERS kill yourself right now

>>9035723
I prefer at least one part of a meal served on a roof tile.

>>9035726
>it still looks unappetizing and unsymmetrical

This is rage fuel.

>>9035780
>that'll be $63 plus tax

>>9035726

>>9035784
>which costs between $210 and $265 per person, depending on the day
actually

>>9035787
Fuck right the heck off

>>9035780
are these people mentally ill or something??? wtf...

>>9035792
The table is my canvas. The chocolate sauce, the brush.

>>9035791
Here's another dessert from the same restaurant. Just as retarded.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EtsQkuuZeyg

>>9035749
I actually like that, nice idea and presentation. If that's already too pretentious for you then I'll guess fine dining isn't for you.

>>9035801
Bait

>>9035749
That ones okay actually, it's a neat, fun little idea. It's more pretty than pretensious.

>>9035740
fucking kek I watched that again last night

>>9035780
I bet my pudding from Aldis tastes miles better.

>>9035723
>The current year
>Not being a gourmet artisan.

>The “smoke” course includes a molcajete filled with burning palo santo sticks alongside a volcanic stone bearing chicken thigh, chicken-liver mousse rolled in dehydrated huitlacoche and hoja santa, and a cube of coal-charred pineapple skewered with a skull pin.

https://youtu.be/wqDaZsgR5zg

>>9035863
ugh I hate when a dish has a title

>>9035819
unlike traps.

>>9035819
I wanna take that boy out for a nice dinner and a movie.

He looks like someone I'd share my malted milk with, if you know what I mean.

>>9035863
>paying for a 300 dollar meal just to crack your own egg and watch it cook

I don't know why you cunts seem to enjoy getting worked up over this. If you don't enjoy presentation on the more playful side just choose a more traditionalistic restaurant from one of the classic cuisines, it's just horses for courses.

>>9035780
Is that food or abstract art?

>>9036110
Yes

>>9036101
utterly retarded!

>>9035726
Shit like this is the reason I quit my job.

>>9035780
This is the most complicated summoning jutsu I've ever seen

>>9035863

>>9036139
shut up Kelly

>>9036139
I think the critique of the dish is kinda unwarranted.
The point is that its pretentious dish, thats what people pay for. Its a good thing.
>Man, wasnt that pretentious?
>I know, its great.

>>9036147
I don't know man, it's literally a single duck egg with some flowers and salad.

>>9036147
>Haha I love paying 300 dollars so I can eat pretentious food ironically and laugh at how dumb it is

>>9036151
I mean the main point is the experience and talking about, so all the fluff around the egg is a bonus.
>>9036154
Idk where you get the price tag from but yeah.

>>9035893
Normally I -like- the fancy presentations but this one is a little too much like some unused joke from the Simpsons.

>>9035749
Why does the bowl have those enormous rims?

>>9035726

Something about this makes me feel ill at ease but I can't quite describe it

>>9036537
The plate is a canvas.

>>9035723
from the thumbnail i thought it was gonna be an ice cube in there

>>9036117
Haha are you serious? I quit jobs for some dumb ass reasons but that's so dumb I respect it.

>>9035726
This is like the opposite of food porn.

>>9035863
Man, fucking Redzepi

>>9036121
+1

>>9035863
it's a fucking FRIED EGG

>>9035723
>Here you are, sir. That will be $139.95.

>>9035726
what is the point of this shit? most of it doesn't even look like it tastes good and it's probably $40 a plate too.

>>9035780
>Excuse us while we JUST your table

>>9036741
the ambiance, the show, the good company of your friends, the smiles from the waiters... it's all money well spent, my friend.

>>9035726
even gordon ramsay would yell at this fucking trash

I'm insecure about my class in society and am embarassed to enjoy eating at places like Taco Bell so I'll complain about food I will not only never see myself, but will be unable to appreciate it

>>9036139
>palette

Outside of baiting on this shit board, that's a sure fire sign of a fucking retard.

>>9036770
>muh premium shit

because sprinkling cookie crumbs and melted chocolate is something rich people need to pay for huh

>>9036756
yeah but it looks like shit. if the presentation involves a blowtorch or the cook flipping stuff in the air that's understandable, but most of this is just tiny bits of some kind of paste with weeds sprinkled on a huge plate.

>>9036770
>there is no in between paying an extreme amount of money for the emperor's new clothes and eating fast food

huh guess this is how trust fund babbys think

>>9036770
If that's true, then why did three separate people say >>9035749 was good?

Could it be that plating with tweezers doesn't magically make a meal look and taste good?

>>9036793
This is gay, I wish it was more like hibachi grill

>>9035726
I feel like I'm the only one that likes this webm.

>>9036770
t. tattoo ridden numale hipster scum

>>9036161
>main point is the experience
The main point is eating food that is leagues better than anything I could possibly cook myself. The ingredients may be good, but I don't want to pay the fine dining experience price just to eat a fried egg with spinach that I cooked myself.

>>9035726
>hand tattoo
like clockwork

>>9036117
What has this got to do with cleaning public toilets?

>>9036745
>Audible chucle

>>9035726
>That'll be $350

>>9036802
>emperor's new clothes
Sour grapes.

>this fucking thread

I've finally confirmed my suspicion that a majority of people on this board are uncultured tasteless plebs from hickville countie or ghettos whose idea of a good meal should absolutely require gorge-level platefuls of food made from scratch at home because muh simplicity and/or muh betterculinary skills

you're all hopeless but here's a bit of advice for you fucking failures because i'm optimistic like that: take your blinders off, open your goddamn minds, and experience food with together with your other senses instead of solely relying on how good it should taste and how much it'd fill your fucking stomachs

maybe then the world would be a slightly better place to live in and i'd actually not be revolted at the thought of sharing the air i breathe with all of you

>>9036989
Spoken like a true snob, really.

>>9036989
I'm assuming this is pasta?

>>9036989
I bet you wear clothes you fucking aristocratic son of a bitch.

>>9036989
You sir are a man of taste and class

I salute you

>>9035797
I've never been so repulsed. Are you actually supposed to pay to eat off a dirty table like a fucking animal

>>9035749
>yeah, give me the facehugger special
looks terrible.

>dirty table
Don't be so fucking melodramatic

>>9036989
I agree with you my good sir!
*tips fedora*

>>9037039
didn't quote
>>9037029

>>9036998
>>9037006
>>9037042

>triggered plebeians crawling out the woodwork

did I strike a nerve, you wastes of human resources?

it's not too late to change. read up on class and style, work hard and save up your money to experience better gastronomical concoctions at quality establishments.

you can't really call yourselves food enthusiasts if you're focused on pre-cooked, corporate-driven foodstuffs now, would you?

Didn't fucking think so.

>>9037042
An excellent rebuke my good fellow!
*gives reddit gold*

>>9037056
>read up on class

the only plebe here is you
you can only be born into class, this is the problem with this food, its all for jumped up proles with a bit of dosh trying to imitate what they think fine dining is

>>9037056
You literally bitched about us caring about how the food tastes. You don't are about the food, you only want a status symbol for you to post on Instagram
>>9037084
This guy gets it.
.

>>9035863
>>9035863
>mfw reading the comments


To all the morons shouting "pretentious", "scam" and other hateful, ignorant statements, it's obvious that you have no idea what cooking and food is about. Does that mean a New York city hot dog isn't considered good food? No. But this guy is reimagining food and changing the conventional way we think about eat. Sight, taste smell, etc, all come into play when you eat. Some of your best memories are centered around food, and a lot of how good you remember something "tasted", you remember more about the people and experiences around you than even the flavors. Not only does his food taste incredible, he plays, he discovers, he experiments, and does things you lot would never even think of while standing in line for something you're just used to eating, filled with salt and sugar, told is good by someone else, shovel in your mouth, and a million other ways of dulling your dining experience. The reason he's voted best in the world are for some of these reasons. I would gladly pay hundreds for his food because at the end of the day, he is giving you something you will probably experience once in your life and is the reason (even in a pretentious, ego driven word as the culinary one can be) that chefs are called artists. But go on then, keep dribbling about how you are a better, more genuine critic of "real" food while this guy keeps collecting awards, respect, recognition and $$ while you post mean comments on YouTube and feel proud knowing you know how to cook a steak.

>>9036101
I would try it depending on how overpriced it is. Ambience is nice.

compare this dish https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8KwhJcxYdV4
\
to the sloppy stuff in here >>9035726

superficially they look similar but the above video is both simple and elegant, and still manages to look appetizing and fresh

>>9037112
>You don't (c)are about the food, you only want a status symbol for you to post on Instagram

Way to put words in my fucking mouth, degenerate.

I didn't say anything about posting fine culinary dining experiences on any form of social media now, did I? If you wanna do it, fine, it's your life. What's important is you experience and appreciate the moment and let it be a part of your history as a human being.

And this guy >>9037084 didn't get it

>you can only be born into class

You actually think that people are just naturally classy? No, you idiot. They grew up LEARNING it from their parents and/or educators. Has your brain malfunctioned and is unable to store/rewrite information that you can execute for future use? Are you unable to change the mistakes you've made in your life? You're able to join the thread, so I guess it still works.

You're fucking hopeless, but because I am an optimistic person, here's more advice to steer you in the proper direction.

>>9037170
>They grew up LEARNING it from their parents
not exactly its bred into them due to generations of living a certain way.
tryhard new money always looks so goofy when they pretend they can "learn" or purchase class by consuming things they perceive as classy.

maybe its just a yank thing to honestly think you can "change" your class so easily, maybe because your entire nation is full of redneck rubes with no dignity or culture

>>9036872
this

>>9036989
Post your syck tattoos breh B)

>>9036989
I'm using this as pasta, thanks faggot.

>>9037174

and what is so terrible about being interested to living a more respectable lifestyle?

at least the person is attempting to be better. telling them to just stop because you're embarrassed at them being goofy-looking and "tryhard" wouldn't help in the grand scheme of things.

and i agree that that it wouldn't be easy to change one's perception of class, but it's damn worth it to try, and that it is still possible to do so at any age

>>9036101
these are extremely pretentious but they're so relaxing to watch with sound

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BxRzzm-mjCE

>>9035796
>The chocolate sauce, the brush
That doesn't make sense. The chocolate sauce is the paint. Your dickbeaters are le brushe.

>>9037207
>at least the person is attempting to be better.
because they aren't really trying, but rather they are trying to buy their way into "class" without the effort involved
also plebs are scum and don't deserve anything upper class
go eat your sloppy hot dogs and sit down

>>9036897
joke on you. I used to wash the dish for living

>>9037227
>the effort involved
>I was born special to classy rich people!

Such effort.

Now close up that garage and revv the engine. We both know you're sick of living.

>>9037220
I know man I even thought it as brush, corrected myself to paint, and then typed it as brush anyway.

>>9036989
I read this whole thing in Ernie's voice

>>9037227

That's an unfair assumption to those who are actually trying to be better. Yes, it's unavoidable that some people might opt for the easy way and just pretend, but it's better to just assume that they are actually trying, just to maintain the survival of a higher-standard in living.

That way they can be corrected and actually respect your opinions, with a higher chance of them emulating the said opinion.

Plebs are scum, I agree with that too, and believe they are needed to exist to actually define what it means to live better. The objective though, is to not strike a balance between the two, but to limit their numbers so that as a tool, people who are living better can actually explain HOW they're better.

>>9035780
And then you lick it up like a dog..?

>>9037235
Really, I had you down as booker prize recipient.

>>9035787
I call bullshit, the customers are no way dressed well enough to afford that shit. If you could afford this shit you wouldn't be leaning back with that shitty posture in a $10 walmart dress.

>>9036989
*tips fedora*

>>9035863
>That whole fucking comments section
There's no way 90% of those comments aren't made by this René himself.

>>9037360
>I call bullshit
Well that's great for you buddy but just go look at the Alinea website

>>9035740
My autism kicked in when watching that shit

>>9035838
What in the actual fuck? This is from the devil child of gentryfication

>>9036989
How new are you? At least it evolved from purely instant rammen

>>9036790
Dude I'm just posting a comment from youtube.

>>9037623
He was referring to the original poster of the comment you fucking numbnuts.

ITT: shitposting anon successfully derails thread

>>9035726
>food for ants

>>9036989
Hicksville is in Nassau County though

>>9037170
You're born with it, you filthy ingrate.

If only you had a proper education to know that. Seeing where you come from, it devalues your opinion even more, in my eyes.

>tfw people push the only two hobbies you enjoy (video games and cooking) to be """art""" ,completely undermining what they're supposed to be in the first place (video games you watch instead of play, and food you're not supposed to eat)

Is there any hobby safe from these modern "artists"?

>>9035726
all of it looks disgusting lol

wtf

>>9036989
This post reminds me of a old Food Network episode on food presentation and its effects on customers

They opened up two restaurants and sold the same food and drinks but did the presentation different.

One just put food on paper plates and wine in plastic cups with a slice of cake

The other put the same food on nice ceramic plates and fancied up the food then put the same wine in nice wine glasses and presented the same cake differently too

Then they got two groups of people and told them to go to both restaurants and rate the food.

Remember this was the same food and wine just presented differently. The Restaurants also priced their food differently the one with the paper plates and plastic cups sold their meals for $4. 50 and the one with the nice plates and wine glasses sold their meals for $14.50

Both groups said that the food on the plastic plate was tasteless and that the wine was cheap and that the cake was too sweet. Some didn't even finish thier meals and one asked for their money back

They both said they would never eat at the first restaurant again

Then they went to the other restaurant and said the food was superb and to give compliments to the chef they also said the wine was exquisite and they could tell it was a good wine.
The cake was rated top notch and just the right amount of sweet without being overbearing

Both groups said they would definitely eat at this restaurant again

Then they were brought back to the Office where they were briefed at the beginning of the show and brought both owners out, both worked for Food Network.

They then told the groups that the show was really about food presentation and that the food They ate at both restaurants was the same and then asked how they felt about this.

They were all embarrassed and shocked that they couldn't tell the difference and how the presentation fooled them into paying more for the same food when they wouldn't eat it at the other place that sold it for $10 cheaper

>>9037690
So what we've learned is that paper plates and plastic cups diminishes the enjoyment of food. I could have told you that in a much shorter post.

You'll also find that if you blast an air horn in someone's ear while they try to enjoy something, their enjoyment of that thing is typically diminished.

From this we can learn that all enjoyment is in your head. But we already knew that, didn't we. Well, some of us did, anyway. I hope this has been an interesting lesson for you.

Babby's first philosophy of mind dot exe

>>9035723
>anything that isn't fast food is pretentious.
Retard.

>>9037712
Perception is not ab absolute thing. Presentation is definitely part of it, but so is cost. The more people pay for something the higher they value it. This is particularly true of wine. While some wine is objectively terrible and some is amazing, most wine is somewhere in the middle. If you give someone middle grade wine and tell them it's cheap they will dismiss it in their mind before even tasting it. Tell them it's expensive and they will strain to appreciate it.

That's just human nature. Presentation counts because we associate it with price. And justifiably so - a beautifully presented plate takes extra time and effort to prepare - it's not the kind of thing you really see at cheap places, but it's a given at expensive ones.

Just like wine when the food is neither terrible nor amazing people will judge their meals on other cues:price, presentation, service, decor and their perception of who the other patrons are. Great example would be my neighborhood Italian joint. An excellent bowl of fresh pasta in a nearly perfect sauce costs $12. But it's a cramped little shabby-chic restaurant patronized by locals. At a Cirpiani joint people pay nearly two and a half times that amount for a plate of pasta that's good, but not even as good as my local place. But at the Cipriani joint the dining room is beautiful, the service excellent and the customers mostly very wealthy. Even though their food is a step down from my local the perception most people would have is that the Cipriani joint is the much better restaurant. And playing off that aspect of human nature is what keeps them in business.

You seem upset by this
Probably because you fit the stereotype of a pretentious asshat.

So is this food so expensive just because the ingredients are hand harvested by the kitchen staff instead of bought from a supplier? I've seen some very impressive dishes at higher class establishments but the dishes that are posted in these threads always seem to be style over substance. The shitposters seem to switch between saying food is isn't about the taste but the presentation, and implying that anyone who doesn't like it is a lower class 400lb McDonald's eater from Kentucky.

>>9035723
What is it?

>>9037724
>Cirpiani
You know how I can tell this is just sour grapes? Because if you could afford Cipriani you'd at least know it's spelled like it sounds. But you've never heard it spoken aloud. You just saw someone post an opinion about it on the internet and got buttmad.

Nobody goes to Cipriani for the food. They go there to avoid poor people stink. Much like how people of your social class go to Chipotle to avoid the homeless people at MacDonalds, and the homeless people at MacDonalds go there to avoid the even scarier homeless people cooking stray cats under the bridge.

>>9037723
>Anything that isn't 3 morsels of protein with a pool of sauce served on a roof tile is fast food.

>>9037735
>You know how I can tell this is just sour grapes? Because if you could afford Cipriani you'd at least know it's spelled like it sounds
Pic related
>You just saw someone post an opinion about it on the internet and got buttmad.
Pot calling the kettle black: the post

>Nobody goes to Cipriani for the food.
>They go there to avoid poor people stink.
Got proof for those claims?
>Much like how people of your social class go to Chipotle to avoid the homeless people at MacDonalds, and the homeless people at MacDonalds go there to avoid the even scarier homeless people cooking stray cats under the bridge.
You know my social class?
Do tell

>>9037751
wew

>>9037724
>Cipriani
There are very good restaurants that are very expensive and well done while still keeping from straying into dishes like the OP. The issue is there are a lot of places the rich go only because they are rich and can afford it. Having taste and being rich are not the same thing. Think about all those people who buy horrendously tacky Gucci clothing because they can but still look like shit.

>>9037759
Yeah, I addressed that here
>>9037724
In response to the shitposter

I think anything not served on a porcelain/ceramic/wooden plate or bowl is pretentious.

>>9037768
I don't think it's always pretentious, but it is always in bad taste.

>>9037780
But it's on a plate
What's the problem?

>>9035780
i'd love to see the managers face when you order this and then call him to demand a new table and your dessert served in a civilized manner.

>>9037780
Was the handle cut off, or why does it not fall over?

>>9037810
I'm pretty sure in all the other photos I've seen of shovel food the handles were cut down.

>>9037824
I'm assuming this presentation is supposed to be wild west imagery. But who the fuck would carry around shovels with broken handles in the wild west?

>>9037832
A old prospector?

>>9037832
I think it's supposed to be an English working class breakfast. Some kind of laborer imagery.

>>9035726
>that would be 49,99$ not including VAT please tips are mandatory :)

>>9037690
>>9037712
Aren't you afraid your enter key is going to wear out sooner from all this reddit spacing?

>>9036989
>going to a restaurant
>talking about culture

Lyl

>>9035726
>he guys I went to cook school but I didn't take any art class in my life, are you impressed at all those techniques I can ape without any basic understanding of what I'm doing XD?

>>9035863
>You'd be surprised at how many people haven't cracked an egg before

>>9035873
>>9035893
>>9036139
>>9036688
>>9036717
>>9037141
>>9037443

>t. people who have never eaten at noma.

It's not a fucking everyday lunch, it's an experience and to many a once in a lifetime at that.

>>9036537
fashion fad. They literally read in cook books what's "in" for <current year> and do accordingly without anything to say.
Haven't you noticed how /ck/ or food shows all feature the same novelty in the same time period? It's not coincidence or even memetic imitation, it's programmed advertising.

>>9037690
stop redditposting your wall of text is fucking unreadable, faggot.

>>9037894
>it's an experience

Nice buzzword. Cooking at home for your family/friends is an experience aswell but aparently doing that means you are a fat american who eats at mcdonalds

>>9035723

BASED MARCO wouldnt put up with this shit

>I hate the snobbery of it. I hate food being overworked. Most chefs paint pictures on plates to hide their lack of technical ability. They are doing it for themselves, not for their guests. How many people walk into a Michelin-starred restaurant and don’t feel comfortable? They can’t take their tie or jacket off, can’t speak too loudly. When I had my three stars I never had a dress code. Who am I to dictate how people should dress? And how many think they’ve got to say the food is delicious because of where they’re sitting? If they are honest, they’d prefer to have a corned beef sandwich with some Branston’s or get a take-away curry.

>Why should good eating be so formal? I don’t want a f***ing tasting menu. You have one mouthful and then you are waiting for the next course! Starter, main course – if it’s that good I’ll come back tomorrow and choose some other ones. If you force things in life, they break. Allow people to eat food! Waiters start talking you through every dish like you are an imbecile.

>>9037911
You know how I can tell you're poor? You're spouting an opinion on fine dining that was expressed by a guy who retired before you were born. The majority of michelin-starred restaurants no longer have a dress code, in other recent news the USSR is no more, and boycott/divest is now focused on Israel rather than South Africa

>>9037170
Class is hereditary you dumb nigger

>>9037894
have YOU eaten at noma?

because youre a faggot who is doing the exact same thing as the people you are railing against. except that youre desperate to put yourself in a position of superiority over them by believing in an imaginary patrician image the restaurant projects

the dishes at noma look like shit, and a lot of them i know will taste like shit based on the videos alone. one of the ''signature dishes'' was 2 pieces of white asparagus drenched in extracted pine oil with a dollop of whipped cream. have you ever chewed pine needles? heres a hint: theyre inedible and taste like utter shit

>>9037894
Whatever you have to say to justify spending 900 buckaroos on larvae droppings served on a pile of twigs, faggot.

>Noma (disease), an infection of the mouth or genitals
No.
>NOMA (company), American manufacturer of holiday lighting
No.
>Noma (restaurant), a restaurant in Copenhagen, Denmark
Is that it?

>>9037920
When Hemingway asked Ford Maddox Ford if he could be considered a gentleman (high class), Ford replied, "Of course not old chap - you're not English!"

>>9037684
War

>>9038040
>fags and women are allowed to go to war
Are you crying yet?

>>9035863
I don't know but it seems to me that he added way too much oil AND the butter, burnt the egg and I really don't know about eating an egg floating in liquid.

I respect noma, but this seriously looks shit. Also I really don't know what does the cooking on hay adds to the flavor.

>>9035863

>The dish is a dish that the guests cook themselves

Bruh that's ridiculous and retarded

>>9035863
Are the guests instructed, or are they just left with the egg and the pan?

How does it work?

Do you have to take training lessons before visiting the restaurant?

>>9036101
>>9037212
If I were a filthy rich fuck that's the only thing ITT I would pay money for.
But I would light the cigarillo with a match myself, thank you very much.

>>9038121
>filthy rich
>fancy cocktails
I dunno about that particular bar but any decent city has places that sperg out like that, the cocktails shouldn't be any more than $20 or so

They don't taste any better than $15 cocktails but they're sure as hell a lot more fun to watch being made, and to drink

If you want to save money of course you can just make cocktails with top-shelf booze in the comfort of your home, but that's not what this is about is it

>>9038127
I didn't make myself clear enough.
If I were a filthy rich fuck, I would occassionally do economy class trips to Japan, Tokyo just to drink at fancy bars like this one.
From my experience higher class bars like these don't really exist in the west. They are just shitty imitations by millenial subhuman degenerate hipster nu-male fags with tats and that standard hair cut and beard. You know the kind I'm talking about. I despise them with every fibre of my body and soul.
Sure, I can get fancy cocktails for $40 here, but it's the location and the trash-tier people that don't cut it for me.
I want authenticity, the right kind of ambience and the right people to do it.

>>9037938
>have YOU eaten at noma?
Yes, yes I have.
And you couldn't be more wrong, but you seem pretty adamant in your opinion.
Hint: fresh needle shoots are nothing like year old needles.

>larvae droppings
Last I checked that wasn't on the menu.

>>9038177
>From my experience higher class bars like these don't really exist in the west
That's because you are a flyover, as proven by the fact that you use terms like "nu-male" and have confused ideas about authenticity. Most Japanese men can't do beards. If they could, I can assure you they would. As for the tattoos there are cultural reasons why most Japanese bartenders are not sporting them as they do here in the West.

Those Japanese bars are literally the antithesis of authenticity. Japs are often severely autistic and study foreign ways so diligently that they become better at those foreign things than the inventors of said foreign things. See: Japanese single malt whisky, or the fact that Japanese tailors have created this bizarrely perfect fantasy version of American "trad" style that is far better than anything Americans ever did.

If being in Japan is an important part of the experience for you, that's a legitimate desire, but don't fool yourself into thinking that it's not an imitation.

>>9035863

>>9035780
Once they finished I would laugh, shake my head without saying a word, get up from the table and walk straight out without paying the bill, and no tip.

>>9038197
>eating it without washing it
Every parasite-ridden fox in the vicinity has licked and pooped on it. The tapeworm says hello.

>>9035863
looks like a nice dish to make at home, but paying a fuckton of money to cook some fried egg with herbs at a restaurant? no thanks

>>9035726
>keeps fucking touching the food with his bare hands
>those shit compositions
I'm extremely angry

>>9038257
>gets mad a chef touches the food with bare hands
really?

>>9035723
how are you supposed to know how to eat it
does the waiter tell you

>>9035780
>le hipster dessert
This is stupid as shit

>>9038267
I don't want a motherfucker to handle my food without any protection. I don't care.

>>9038279
I'll bet you don't even bother to wash your own hands when you go to a restaurant after having touched the door handle, chairs, menu, etc.

I think it's funny how people sperg out over things like this yet almost certainly don't bother with something far far more important.

>>9038257
>I am such a fucking sperg that I can't allow my food to be touched in my sight
This make you happy, aspie-kun?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z5-_MTTE2Rs

>>9035863
>based Redzepi poster

Lmao, he's such a massive faggot. I'll bet he uses locally sourced lambskin condoms with an all-natural freshly pressed flax seed oil lubricant, with a slight sprinkling of wild beach onions to mask the scent when he lets the bus boys fuck him.

>>9035780

I can't describe the building rage...

What are you supposed to do with that. Just sweep that pile of shit with your forearm into a plate or something?

>>9038286
me in the back

>>9036101
Alchemy increased to 100

>>9038196
>That's because you are a flyover, as proven by the fact that you use terms like "nu-male" and have confused ideas about authenticity. Most Japanese men can't do beards. If they could, I can assure you they would. As for the tattoos there are cultural reasons why most Japanese bartenders are not sporting them as they do here in the West.
I must have triggered you pretty hard, special snowflake.

>but don't fool yourself into thinking that it's not an imitation.
You just said it yourself in your post, nu-male hipster special snowflake. Whereas your kind just likes to copy&paste things like the current IPA and avocado sandwich meme because it's the hip and IN thing to do, those people don't just imitate, they always excell and stick to it, unlike your half-assed kind that only chases trends their whole lives.

>>9038286
>2 minutes until he touches the fish
>over 3 minutes until he slices it
Fuck.

>>9038349
But I'm clean shaven, I've been eating avocado since the early 1980s when I first began to eat solid foods, and I've lived in Japan unlike you.

How does that make you feel, flyover?

What is the most pretentious alcohol?

>>9038380
son of a bitch...

>>9038377
I actually had to wonder whether or not this video is edited.

>>9038377
Probably rhodinol, which naturally carries a nose of rose petals, mandarin, lime (or as flyovers call it, hipster lemon), and tropical fruit notes. It's organic btw...

And oh! It's an alcohol, you've probably never heard of it...

why is /ck/ so threatened by nice things?

>>9038279
it's more sanitary than gloves.

>>9038408
Millennials feel entitled to everything but don't want to work hard

As a result they see others enjoying nice things that they can't afford, leaving them feeling confused, angry, and bitter

>>9038408
Everyone says they're not neckbeards, but they are

>>9036989
This pasta is all-denty

>>9038415
>Millennials feel entitled to everything but don't want to work hard
>As a result they see others enjoying nice things that they can't afford, leaving them feeling confused, angry, and bitter

This.

'Merican millennials have been entirely corrupted by liberal Nigger entitlement culture.

>>9038448
I don't think it has anything to do with nigger culture.

I think it's because they grew up in a relatively wealthy society yet had no idea how much work their parents had to do to get those things which they take for granted.

Fuck this industry, bitch I'm in these streets.

>>9036101
I bet this tastes amazing though

>>9038448
t. mike rowe

>>9035780
>get up and leave on the spot

>>9038349

>>9037832
It's a hand held coal shovel you tit, with a poor quility English breakfast on it. Up in till 35 years ago the majority of British households were heated by coal.

>>get up and leave on the spot

>as apposed to fluctuate between dimensions

What does that even mean?

>>9036161
Hey wanna come over to my house? Give me a hundred bucks and I'll let you fry your own egg in one of my pans, you can even choose which one! What an experience, you and your friends will be talking about this for years!

>>9035780
The haters have obviously not eaten at a high end restaurant before. Food is art. That's why menus are done is such a way to be appealing to the eye. Chances are, if the dish looks beautiful then it probably will taste just as beautiful. An ugly and ill prepared dish is unappetizing and then it becomes difficult to get past that to attempt to eat it. It has nothing to do with pretentiousness. I love a well prepared burger from In N Out Burger as well as high end food sculptures.Michelin stars are for chefs what oscars are for actors, or a high zagat rating for a fast food joint. At restaurants such as Alinea, you aren't just paying for some guy in a jumpsuit cooking you a meal...you are paying to enjoy a culinary experience from a highly trained and qualified chef who has spent years studying and honing his craft.You wouldn't use the cheapest backyard mechanic to work on your nicest vehicle, you'd take it to a reputable and trustworthy mechanic and if the job requires it, a mechanic that specializes in the car you have. You want quality work. That reputable mechanic spent years honing his craft to build a reputation. Same is true with restaurants like this. The chef, if he cares about his craft, desires a good reputation. Culinary art, if done well, is a wonderful experience. Can I afford this kind of lifestyle? No, but I have eaten at a few high-end restaurants and it is absolutely a fantastic and fun experience.One last note, Grant is relatively young and likes playful dishes. I attribute this dessert to childhood when playing in the mud and making mud pies and such. It's cool. Those that scoff, no offense, just simply don't get it or think it's frivolous. That's fine, everyone has an opinion. I just fail to see how one can have a good, solid opinion about something they haven't experienced before. Reminds me of the commercial about the guy that hasn't tasted Almond milk before but has the opinion that he doesn't like it. Well, duh.

So why is everything pretentious generally just small amounts of dairy and berries?

>>9035863
How in the fuck does a dish like this even become popular? Does it cater to the lowest common denominator or what?
>that'll be $900

>>9038218
That's part of the experience

>>9038593
Is your house hyped by restaurant hyped by the most respected restaurant reviewers in the world? No? So fuck off.

>>9036989
No because there is nothing appealing about having a pretentious dish made by some elementary school drop out who claims grass from his backyard is "revolutionary" fuck off you palateless pig

>>9035723

>>9038675
My theory is that those are things people associate with luxury and wealth, when in reality, they're dirt cheap to purchase in bulk and shit out. Basically, it's to make people feel like they're getting more for what they're paying.

>t. poorfag

>>9035726
>carefully places food in specific random locations

>>9038665
Is this a bait or are you actually autistic?

>>9038665
>Food is art

Really, you pretentious hipster fag? Last time I checked food is there to keep you alive, not to eyefuck your wives son.

>>9035749
thats actually pretty neat
i hate that type of bowl with a burning passion, but the food is alright.

>>9035780
how do you eat it?

>>9037780
>it's on a plate anyway
What's the fucking point?

>>9035780
thats nice, desu
would eat it if its not expensive
dont really get why is everyone getting triggered because of it

>>9038415
>nice things that they can't afford
Round trip to Copenhagen plus the cost of Noma can be had for ~$2000, including wine. It's not even a three-star restaurant.

>>9038820
Yes but think about how many rare IPAs you can buy for $2000, and you can line your shelves with the empties to show off your patrician taste

>>9035726
why are the plates so fucking huge for like 3 bites of food

everything that is nouvelle cuisine

>>9038796

I don't know if I could eat a giant wood louse, I mean I'm sure I could but I wouldn't pay for it

how 2 maek stronk fascist african nigger empire in licky2??'''?'?'

>>9038665
>Food is art
Let me fucking enlighten you fucking faggot on what is really going on.
Last time I check this is what art is nowadays
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wKFZOIv5sS0

Post modernism has robbed the world of meaning and beauty.
There is no beauty, there is no meaning. There is no standard.
Modern art were made to reflect that philosophy, to be the antithesis of beauty.

And now this is what cooking has become.
These fucking post modern cooking memes like molecular gastronomy and plating are the modern art of cooking.
They do not seek to create tasty food. Fuck no.
what they want is the opposite of tasty.
They are feeding you literal shit and you are a fucking moron if you don't find this shit tasty.

>>9035749
Remove the fucking flowers and I'd love to have that after a well cooked and filling meal.

>>9036121
underrated

Food has definitely been stolen from us for a very long while. What I mean by that is that we treated it as fuel and our only appreciation of it equated gluttony.

We seem to have claimed it back over the last couple of decades. What saddens me is that our newfound appreciation of food hasn't translated into an admiration for qualitative ingredients, their simplicity and how and why they compliment one another, but a culture embedded in an autistic fetishization of food coupled with an obsession over what every single facet of this culture signifies. It's transparent in Instagram posts, TV programmes and day to day talks.

We have gone from abandoning food, to fetishizing it like autistic materialists. Pretty disgusting.

>>9038825
Well, you'd be spending the exact same amount of money so it all works out the same in the end. Except you might be able to recoup some of your losses by recycling the IPA bottles.

>>9036101
Why has nobody mentioned this man is using a buttplug to cork the glass

>>9037902
>a bloo bloo I don't have the attention span to read more than a line in an hour

>>9036792
They aren't crying about it on the internet at least.

>>9035797
what kind of legit retards are entertained by this?

>>9038816
>would eat it
Explain how. Lick the table clean? Like some kind of animal?

>>9038987
yes
table manners are a spook

>>9038919
Ahh more genius from the nu males at noma! I bet they didnt gut the thing either in order to give you an authentic natural experience

>>9036989
>>9037056
>>9037141

>people with money get tricked into believing dining here is some sort of culture capital

it's just regular people buying into consumerism, just with more money

>>9037084
this guy is right too

>>9035726
>Microgreens on everything
Sure sign its not worth eating because the person making it has no originality.

>>9037911
love that man

depresses me even more he whores himself out to stock cubes

>>9035726
>Sliced raw banana on top of cake crumbs and little dabs of ice cream
So is it a shitty pretentious banana split, or a shitty pretentious bananas foster?

>>9035838
If they give you a tiny enough piece, you won't realize they are serving you burnt to charcoal pineapple!

>>9037334
Underrated

>>9038218
>implying he actually ate it and it's not just a rehearsed, staged advertisement

Here is a picture of some Sunchoke soup I had in Vegas.


They add the liquid later, the stick in the middle is a carved potato, the rocks are mushrooms, and the moss is green tea.

>>9039091
that's pretty gay. How did it taste?

>>9035726
Are those fucking banana slices?

>>9039093
It was really good.
The green tea and mushrooms added a nice earthy flavor to the more sweet sunchoke. Worked really well together.
The potato tasted like a potato.

>>9037894
>t. diddler

>>9037170
>You actually think that people are just naturally classy? No, you idiot. They grew up LEARNING it from their parents and/or educators.
t. Tryhard new money pleb

>>9038665
>food is art
>mechanics is art
>everything is art

Is there anything that you don't over intellectualise? You're trying too hard.

>>9039091
honestly looks pretty cute, wouldn't mind trying that. how was the price?

Does pretentious food taste better than normal food?

>>9035749
That was cute.

>>9036121
noice lol

>>9035723
Anything with mundane ingredients that costs more than $40 a plate.

Let me save you a lot of money.
>Get some well prepared, inexpensive food.
>Don't look at it. Blindfold yourself.
>Have someone describe to you how beautiful and fancy it is while you eat it, including all kinds of madey-uppy but plausible sounding preparation steps.

Congratulations, you're now enjoying a $250 plate of food.

I don't understand how people can even sit there in enjoyment while some schmuck casts a spell on your single olive or whatever. It would really make me uncomfortable to put someone else through such pointless labour, maybe I'm just an autist though.

>>9038830
what decade is it in your neck of the woods? shall we complain about how everything is made in Japan now and you need a PhD to program the VCR?

>>9035819
Where can I see him getting fucked at?

>>9038715
isn't this just vermicelli?

>>9039599
135 dollars for a 5 course menu.
Of course it also had an amuse bouche and petite fours.
I think the wine pairing was 60 additional, and it was pretty great.

>>9037141
tldr; presentation bullshit

>>9038987
you can clearly seen spoons in front of each person

>>9039809
placebos have been scientifically proven to work so yes

everything is in your mind if you convince yourself

>>9035863
>hay oil

>>9037832
>>9037780
It's a restaurant in a railway station in the UK.
It is supposed to evoke the "fireman's breakfast", locomotive crew breakfast cooked on a shovel in the firebox.

>>9038218
Did you not eat wild berries in the fields as a child?

>>9040386
british firemen eat from shovels? their culture just mystifies me.

>>9040400
No. Fruit cocktail from a cup. But I don't like the pears.

>>9040404
think he's referring to people on old time trains where the only to cook would have been to shove something in the coal box where the fire is

>>9040406
>not getting the point
I eat wild greens and fuits without washing though. It won't get you sick unless you have a fag stomach.

>>9036989
Include me in the screencap

>>9037918
There might not be any dress codes but 11 course tasting menus are ubiquitous in 3 star establishments. They're tailored to be once in a lifetime edible "experiences" which have little to do with food people actually eat done at a level that they can't do with ingredients they can't source. That to me is the essence of fine dining. Not foams and gels and microgreens and square inch of meats.

I think the industry got to where it is because ingredients became cheaper to import and techniques easier to learn. Which meant that too many people could serve the best quality food. Which meant a gap opened up at the top end which was filled by this self appeasing crap.

>>9035723
While I think pretentious food is memeworthy I dont think its bad or wrong. Its part of the experience of some fine dining places. It can be art and it can also be bullshit but if they are charging premium prices you can bet it tastes good no matter what. If you want fine dining that isnt pretentious steakhouses are a good bet.

>>9035838
That looks amazing honestly. I dont think its dumb at all. It really does look like art. Especially with the dill and sesame seeds.

>>9037712
>an air horn is just in your head

What?

>>9040685
Faggot.

>>9038286
>2:10
>fish gets caught in his sleeve
sudoku

>>9037141
>MUH MEMORIES

>>9036848
i love when i have tiny useless leaves scattered around my food that im not supposed to eat but am paying eighty dollars for because AMBIANCE
GOOD TIMES WITH FRIENDS
having a good time is only possible if you purchase overpriced leaves placed with tweasers

>>9038121
>lighting anything you smoke with a match let alone a cigarillo
hahahahhaha thats why you arent rich

>>9038959
>I have no one to talk to so I go on long tirades on a 4chan cooking board about food presentation and act like im a rich prince

>>9038377
I have no idea if this supposed to be serious

>>9040770
Butane > match > random fire source > huffing spraypaint >>>>>> lighter fluid

>>9036101

Glad he lit a doobie at the end so you could forget what you just paid for that drink.

>>9038945
that's what all glass bottle stoppers look like you retard

>>9040770
>>9040832
>he doesn't first strike a match, wait for the phosphorus to burn down, then use the match to light a cedar stick which you then use to light the cigar

P L E B S
L
E
B
S

>>9040903
>not wrapping the cedar stick in several thousand dollar bills
What's even the point?

>>9036851
I like it anon. I wouldn't pay for the plating meme but if I get to look at it for free, all these dishes are very aesthetically pleasing.

ITT a bunch of uncultured idiots that haven't been to Alinea. Do you even Michelin?

this stuff looks pretty tasty honestly
its not like you're not getting a good meal since its like 15 courses of these little dishes

>>9041088
the ants I found a bit silly though
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oYcT2oiQMeE

>no one posts the video of René serving you fucking ROCKS

https://youtu.be/GiYmVOZdd6E

>>9035780
>that feel when the blowtorches come out

>>9035723
more garbage from redzepi:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TqwtWBVKons

>>9035749
That's cute actually

>>9035723
What darksouls game is this?

>>9038904
what's wrong with flowers anon-kun? afraid your date will think you're gay? just keep saying "straight" stuff and he'll assume you're bi and confused.

Have an uncle who has spent all of his life since I've been born as a chef in the city. One time we had a family get-together dinner at the place he was working at at the time, and thus got the 'off the menu vip course'. All of this pretentious shit is laughable in comparison to it. There's a difference between plating food for eating and plating food for tasting, but these pricks doing what's been posted here apparently get off on doing the latter and calling it the former.

>>9041088
You'll probably still be hungry after those 15 courses.

>extremely small portions at >10 courses
I thought this meme died 2 decades ago.

>>9037861

Babby bakes a cheesecake

>>9035863
tfw no hay oil :^(

>>9035769
>unsymmetrical
asymmetrical?

>>9035749
the fuck was the point in that, it looked cool while it was "blooming" but just looks like shit in the end

>>9036989
All of this food literally looks like shit though and probably tastes mediocre to shit, they certainly don't look great and there is no complexity to them. You're being a snobby cunt over what amounts to superficial, fashionable, performance art for bourgeoisie you've been jew'd into certain food-fashion circles.

>>9042405
>you've
*who've

Man you guys really are plebs aren't you, lik proper lower class. And I don't mean just in a sense of wealth, but in a sense of culture. You lot are in the lower cultural class. This has very little to do with money. Many of the people who go to these restaurants will save up for a month or two - guess what, spending a few hundred on a great dining experience can be wonderful and you don't need to be rich at all. And yes, these meals are filling. The worst meme of them all is that you won't be full. After 12 dishes you'll be so full that people go to these restaurants after not eating all day so that they can fit it all in. Though I would expect you fatasses wouldn't be satiated. It's all about savouring a fun and novel experience while also taking in someone else's craft. You guys are pathetic.

>>9042416
You're probably the type of nugget that gets all dressed up in black tie and looks forward to attending a High Tea where the queens 3rd level chambermaid is expected to attend.

>>9042492
>queens 3rd level chambermaid
Retard.

>>9038371
>This is what flyovers actually think normal people sound like
>This is what happens when a flyover starts hating himself

How's the weather in Flint this time of year DeMarkus?

>>9042492
LOL no I'm just not an uncultured retard. I wear regular clothes and enjoy spending a night out doing something fun and interesting ever now and then. I bet you also think modern art galleries and museums are pretentious hey. Maybe one day you'll grow up

>The Vintage Carrot
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FjN546QGSMA

Actually doesnt look that bad in the end

>>9035726
Is his really that bad? It looks like this food is made to be served in a number or portions so guests can try many different types of food.

Oh course I've never fine dined so for all I know they give you one plate and you go hungry the rest of the night.

>>9042687
>you also think modern art galleries and museums are pretentious

No, not really. People are always astounded that my musical preference is opera because I'm fairly coarse in my mannerisms and whenever I've visited NYC I've spent alot of time at MOMA and galleries. I just don't consider high end dining art or anything more than a pretentious affectation lining the pockets of a PT Barnum.

>>9037899

it's not a fad you fucktard it's called negative space

>>9036793
>>9040764
>if the presentation involves a blowtorch or the cook flipping stuff in the air that's understandable
>tiny useless leaves

could you have revealed your flyover level any more brazenly

>>9038987

a plate and a table are both a flat surface you fucktard

>>9036989

Youre not wrong that the presentation in some of these foods is fun to look at, but the taste itself is relative.

Ive dined at restaurants where I paid 1k Euro and this level of "show" is unnecessary and screams nouveau riche wannabe cuisine.

The best food Ive ever eat was at a restaurant in Vegas where the person who invited us 8 people paid 15k at the end of the night and they didnt need to do over the top bullshit. It was simple and delicious.

>>9035797
> Be careful with your sleeves.

Take me. I'm done.

>>9037894
>It's an experience

These are the exact words you use to get people to buy an overpriced scam.

>>9036989
LOL you dumb fucking pseud.

>>9044115
FUCKING FLYOVERS REEEEE
YOU DEGENERATES DON'T UNDERSTAND THE COMPLEXITY AND CLASS OF LICKING CHOCOLATE OFF OF A TABLE