/ck/ - Food & Cooking

My splattered brains, served tastefully on the wall

>>8031291

AH SHIET

IS THAT SUM

60' 24'???

watery undercooked risotto

>>8031316
dont you just hate it when the skull takes up more then half the plate?

>>8031288
chicken on the barby

>>8031288
Noddles with grated parmesan and lemon juice.

If he doesn't like it, then he's a hack fraud because he suggests that shit himself.

Raw deer hearts and green beans on the side. Cooked with olive oil and garlic.

steamed steak

Can he even be impressed? Isn't he just a massive prick, or is that just for the cameras?

>>8031447

>>8031452
He liked the dessert made by that stereotypical kike woman in that one KN episode.

>>8031452
He loved the soul food from some restaurant on one of his episodes of kitchen nightmare.
It's mostly for cameras, especially on the American version of hell's kitchen.

>>8031452
american television
>wow what a fucking asshole

british television
>wow what an intelligent and straight to the point guy

>>8031288
I cum in the dish
He will be surprised for sure

>>8031291
/Thread

>>8031288
Try to make a perfect egg
I should have a few tries

>>8031512
why is something that has been around as long as and is exactly as stupid as "lol" "xD" "epic!" and other various stupid shit still posted so often

>>8031527

because nigger tongue my anus

>>8031515
>Try to make a perfect egg
But Ramsey likes them runny, and cooked on super high heat both, with no concept of carryover cooking. That video floating around would be something I'd send back in a restaurant. He doesn't know a good pizza. He has no clue that butter chicken doesn't exist in India, and so forth. He's stupid, I think.

>>8031288
Probably do a sous vide steak, with hash browns or something on the side.

Simple, tasty, hard too fuck up.

>>8031452

He is a prick on TV and off regardless of where he is. He took a camera crew to Marco Pierre White's wedding without being invited just to fuck around and piss him off. He is cocky, always has an attitude, massive prick. Even in interviews he bragged about screwing his bosses wife and constantly scoffs. He is a massive cunt. Jacques Pepin is by far better. Hell even Jamie Oliver is more personable than him.

>>8031567
>Hell even Jamie Oliver is more personable than him.

You may hate the man but there's NO EXCUSE to ever say these words.

>>8031496
The reference you are going for is false. You are trying to imply America has no good chefs so he treats them like crap while British is nothing but good so he isn't so extreme with them. That is false. The reason it's two entirely different shows is because America loves drama. We are all babies and feed off drama and confrontation. A TV show cannot survive in the US without it. So he plays the part and makes it happen to get good ratings, not because every one sucks so badly. He is about his income first. Higher ratings = higher income. Just like calories in = calories out.

>>8031578
but you have to agree chris evans is more charismatic than jeremy clarkson

>>8031598
Do we eat cars now?

>>8031597
You wasted your time correcting someone with the same point of view.

>>8031578

Fuck you fag. Jamie Oliver is nice, helpful, often cooks recipes ordinary people can make at home and he always has an upbeat happy personality. I genuinely enjoy watching Oliver over Ramsay.

>>8031567
Who's gonna watch his show, if he doesn't act like a prick on TV (or off TV)? Whether or not he's a real prick, *shrug* ... ...

>>8031618

Nobody. And he doesn't deserve any shows.

His old show, Boiling Point, shows how much of a prick he truly is

>>8031628
Ditto, Anon.

#wifeymaterial

>>8031288
i would make him a peenut buttter and jely sandwitch with hole grain bred

>>8031288
Some botox soup to iron out his forehead ridges.

>>8031288
Nothing

>>8031316
Is that a doggo?

>>8031288
Apparently a bunch of shit made in an air fryer.

I couldn't care less about impressing him.

>>8031567
>Hell even Jamie Oliver is more personable than him.
Fucking this, and JO annoys the fuck out of me.

>>8031597
I thought he was Implying that Americans are a bunch babies who see him as a prick because of it. Can poster confirm or deny?

>>8031726
https://youtu.be/JLqfechd_qQ

>>8031726
http://ask.metafilter.com/193719/kitchen-nightmares-UK-and-US-version-why-is-there-such-a-huge-difference-in-quality

>>8031755

>>8031712
looks like a goat to me

eggs on toast

>>8031678

I love a woman that knows how to sous vide

eels and fucking beans and some beefwater because that's what a fucking british shithead chef would love

>>8031288
pick a recipe of Ja/ck/'s at random
Follow his video exactly, down to how long he cooks the food

>>8031678
does the little button pop out to let you know they're done?

>>8031316
You can't cook that within an hour bubbo.

>>8031678
what the fuck are those supposed to be normal sized condoms for humans

time to hang myself

>>8032802
Yup, if you're dick isn't AT LEAST that long+thick you should kill yourself. No woman will ever want you

Grilled prawns and scallops. Some kind of fru fru salad on the side - watercress, radish sprouts, lemon and lime zest, and curly parsley with a vinaigrette dressing.

>>8031288
My dick, chopped off and marinated in oyster juice before a nice deep-frying. Because even cooking for the man is so emasculating already I might as well just do it right.

Chicken noodle pork chops

homemade whopperito

>>8031616
Yeah, Oliver is actaully fun to watch, and I enjoy most of his Youtube channel's cooks, too.

A really good hamburger would be easy as fuck.

>>8031288
A Philips Airfryer recipe, cooked in a Philips Airfryer.

Wal-mart steaks made with a Philips Airfryer.

beef ramen noodles and a glass of ice water

I'd just know he would disagree about the species of bat.

>>8031288
Cook something Indian. He loves his Indian

>>8031288
Daniel Hardcastle's Tortilla Lasagne with Mexican ingredients and actual tortillias
Dry on the outside, Wet on the inside, and glued together with mature cheddar cheese.

>>8031496
no shit, americans are so arrogant

>>8032802

Rubber stretches and expands when air is put into it, see: balloons.

Average size, if you're an American, is 5.5 in length and 4.8 girth.

http://www.targetmap.com/viewer.aspx?reportId=3073

I promise there are people that have lived with much, much smaller dicks than yours. Don't be a child. Learn to give good head, if you really have a small dick.

>>8031557
>hard to fuck up
nigger if u make tuna pasta bake he'll like it but he wont be impressed

>>8031598
he was better on the episode he appeared in

>>8031547

>with no concept of carryover cooking

he specifically mentions carryover cooking in that famous video.

>That video floating around would be something I'd send back in a restaurant

who the fuck cares about your autistic preferences?

> He has no clue that butter chicken doesn't exist in India

butter chicken was invented in india you anus.

>>8033839

fucking americans

>>8031755
>Americans

>>8031291
Maybe 2 hours but not 1 hour

>>8033929
Is this american? What even is it?

my favourite frozen pizza :3

>>8031547
Imagine being the person that wrote this post with the same world view you have now. How disgusting

>>8032717
>I tried to troll but failed: The post

>>8031316
Why doesnt this board have flags...

>>8033983

it's a yorkshire pudding or toad in the hole or summat with some kind of red winey onion gravy. just clearly an american blogger taking a brit food and fucking with the recipe/putting it in a weird context. and the fucking gastropub enamelled pie tin. fucking americans.

the finest, none other

Burrito with ground beef, cilantro lime rice, black beans and shredded cheese

>>8033925
>> He has no clue that butter chicken doesn't exist in India
>butter chicken was invented in india you anus.
I guess you are of equal intelligence as Ramsey. It's urban myth.

>>8034218

whether its precise origin is known or not, it does come from india and it is, in fact, available in india right fucking now you mong.

>>8034218

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g5MlJ3Us10k#t=2m30s

>>8034115
>>8033983
>>8033929
>>8033839
hm, lets reverse google image search and see what we get
http://www.msmarmitelover.com/2014/12/giant-yorkshire-pudding-in-truffle-oil.html

>http://www.msmarmitelover.com/p/about-me.html

>Kerstin Rodgers aka MsMarmitelover launched the supper club/pop up/underground restaurant movement in the UK

>UK

GET FUCKED

>>8034273

that bitch needs to be deported

>>8031288
I'd go with something simple like a chicken fried steak or something. I mean if he's not a total cunt in real life then he would probably prefer something simple but good to something fancy but mediocre

>>8031755

>>8031288
Buttered bread.

You have 24 hours to make a dish that will impress him.

What do you go with?

>>8034111
Because it would then turn into shit

nigga posted 2 videos on his youtube about the fucking philips airshit but they were both unavailable in my country and had thousands of negative votes, half an hour later they were both gone.

>>8035314
>appetizer
Soft shell crab souffle with blue cheese beurre blanc and licorice vapor, to be eaten while listening to a sine wave sweeping across the audible frequency range.

>entree
Venison roasted over hay with a coffee demi glace, chili-lime potato profiteroles, pickled mustard greens. Served on a rotated lazy susan mounted on a hovering drone.

>dessert
Freeze-dried chocolate mousse discs layered with hot and cold pistachio nitro ice cream made tableside, drenched in grand marnier and set ablaze.

>>8035352
Fuck, I forgot the reconstituted bone marrow croutons on my main. Absolutely knackered

>>8035352
>lazy suzan on a drone

kek

>>8035344
no they're still up. which country are you in? i'll laugh if he's too embarrassed to show them in england

>>8031288
Id probably make some turd-infused dish so I can literally watch him eat shit