/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>7915358
All grocery stores have a five finger discount when you're poor

dumpster

>>7915358

get a backpack and go steal from a grocery store. 1 block of cheese in each pocket, some sliced deli meat in your back pocket, loaf of bread, mayo, lettuce and tomato in your backpack with some oil and frozen fries.

You'll be eating like a king in no time, if you get caught just walk out and go to another grocery store.

>>7915377

eww... his feet are touching the food

>>7915390

or go to the store manager, tell him you have no money or food and would work for some sandwich stuff. as a small grocery manager i'd be very empathetic to a request like that, and have had that happen before. i set the dude up with really good stuff.

but majority of time, they were thieves who only poured on the sob story after getting caught. usually called police if they were druggies, if they really kissed ass i'd let them go with the cheapest generic shit and tell them not to ever come back.

>>7915415
This.

I've helped out a lot of the young, homeless girls in my area with food in return for sexual favors.

set up a bird net. free birds for eating every day

>>7915358
Find a soup kitchen.

What kind of help are you looking for, OP?

>>7915415
has a good idea that might set you up with a regular food source.

You can also forage for food in local parks, roadsides, etc. There's lots of wild foods all over the country. You can even usually find some edibles growing in the inner city, if you know where to look.

Or, you can beg people to send you a pizza or money. Sometimes that works.

Try not to be a whore, like one guy suggested. That will just compound your problems.

>>7915434
>I've helped out a lot of the young, homeless girls in my area with food in return for sexual favors.

you're a saint

>>7915439
wow I all I have is snow coffee, you lucky bastard

>>7915434
does that actually work? there are a lot of not entirely unfuckable young ladies begging for food and change near my office, but I'm afraid they'd secretly call their drug addict boyfriend and I'd get robbed and get my throat slit.

all I want to do is have a nice dinner at home with a qt and then maybe watch her pee and then give her a bath before we sleep together platonically. obviously if she's into it I'd also give her an enema and cum down her throat, but she'd be under no obligation to allow that. I'm sure she'd appreciate the hot meal and a warm bed, no? or am I too trusting?

>>7915454
Not really.

More of a father figure really. Someone they can turn to when they're in a pinch and need a good feed.

>>7915464
It works for me although I'm no degenerate weirdo like you.

>>7915434
Enjoy your gonorrhea

>>7915464

>>7915454
at least he came for their rescue
> came
get it?

>>7915464
Your daily reminder that you're still on 4chan, everyone.

>>7915474
how do you approach them? are you dressed like an office worker? I feel like it's extra weird because they're all wearing like, jeans and stuff, and all disheveled, and I'm wearing a nice shirt and expensive looking shoes and a $40 haircut
>>7915477
I said if she's into it. obviously if she doesn't want a stranger to ejaculate in her throat then just puking on my ding-dong would be totally fine, I could finish up on her face

>>7915503
I don't. They approach me.

I run the major grocery store in my town and I guess word has spread amongst them that if they're nice to me, I'll be nice to them in return. Although I'm thinking of ending it after one of my daughters old friends came to see me. Felt a little uneasy.

>>7915514
That's pretty hot. You knew her from before? Did the subject of your daughter come up?

>>7915526
Yeah, used to drive her to dance class and she'd come round my house for dinner.

She didn't ask about Claire, they fell out a few years ago when they were 10 or 11.

>>7915539
>Claire
You slipped up anon. Nobody would mention his daughter's name out of nowhere like that. Pretty good b8 though, 8/8

>>7915464

>>7915434
>>7915464
You guys are playing with fire. One of those girls might be underage and lie about it, then blackmail you for more. And let's not even talk about the deep shit you'll be in if they're knocked up, by accident or design.

Fooling around with people who have EVERY reason to screw you over is a bad move, one which I've seen too many people in my life make. If you're going to play this game, you would do well to ensure your ass is well covered against such schemes.

>>7915645
I'll just off them and throw their corpse in a swamp, if anyone cared enough to look for them they wouldn't be homeless.

>>7915645
I had a vasectomy after my fourth child so no chance of any accidents.

>>7915464

Ugh..../ck/...such a wonderful place.

>>7915651

People ignore the homeless, they don't ignore bodies.

>>7916016
it's 4chan. what did you expect?

>>7915503
>I never said she had to let me stick my dick down her throat, that's disgusting!
>I just want to watch her pee and have her puke on my dick

Jesus fucking Christ anon

>>7915464
>or am I too trusting?


I think you're just too much of an old school romantic

>>7915439
Yeah but bird law in this country is really complicated so you can't just set up a net

Where do you find young white homeless women?

>>7915439
poor bird :(

>>7916148
You have to go somewhere that a lot of young white women show up thinking they'll make it big

New York, San Francisco, or Los Angeles are all a pretty good bet

>>7915358

;_;

>>7915439
DELET THIS

B A V I
A
V
I

>>7915434
how do you sleep at night

>>7918574
Soundly.

Happy in the knowledge that I am helping these girls at a time when no one else will. Would hate to leave them there starving.

>>7918525
:)

>>7915464
I see nothing wrong with this.

>>7918605
Good on you

>>7915459
Thanks for reminding me of that video

>>7915464
It's a mystery why you can't find a gf, anon

>>7915439
If saw one of those in my neighborhood I'd slice it up and call the police on you. I might even sue you for it. That is illegal and cruel to the birds. Why does this even exists? I'll make sure you get put in jail and I get every penny of your money.

>>7921738
Yeah, begging for food that comes in a wrapper has so much more dignity.

Get bent.

>>7918574
Probably a lot better than you, for all your bullshit what do YOU do to help these people?

Nothing, whatever you think he is still better than you.

>>7916114
I wonder if the writers are aware that bird law is an actual thing that really is more complicated than most people would expect.

>>7915358
What kind of area do you live in?

cook sum eggs and like em

>>7915358
Johnny cakes with cheap ass yellow cornmeal or cornmeal porridge.
Cheaper than oatmeal, tastes like depression, but it's something in your stomach. Literally lost 40lbs living off this stuff in college.
Hope you find something to eat soon, my friend.

>>7915358
:( I'd cook 4 u

>>7921748
>trapping innocent animals that are protected under law in many places that will never fill you up is better

ISHYGDDT

>>7924697
>innocent
>animals
http://bangordailynews.com/2013/12/13/outdoors/how-the-non-native-house-sparrow-became-one-of-americas-most-common-birds/

>>7915358
I am sorry, anon. Hope you find some food.

>>7921738

They use them for bird banding. Calm down :)