/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>7474594

I wrap lunch meat around potato chips.

It's called the Chipwich

>>7474600
Can i have the recipe sometime?

I combine my cripplingly low self confidence into my signature peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. With my special touch, I make sure my white bread, smooth jif peanut butter, and Smucker's grape jelly combine into a meal that leaves me with even more dread and a dimmer outlook on life.

>>7474594
I invented the chocolate milk soaked soft pretzel

>>7474594
i invented gastro cooking, or at least started it.

i know nobody is going to believe me, but im drunk and felt like posting regardless

i invented eating away sadness

I make meatballs with cereal and marshmellows and bake. Then I dip it in chocolate

>>7474594
>FOODS YOU INVENTED THREAD

I like to take thinly sliced cold cuts along with cheese and sometimes lettuce and tomato and put them in between two slices of bread.

And dig this; you can pick it up and eat it without getting your hands messy!

I call it; Welsh Jackalope.

>>7474594
when i was 8 i thought i invented fairy bread. yeah im fat now.

Mac and Cheese with tater tots stirred in

delicious carbs

haven't named it but I'll go with: Totty Mac

I put ground beef in the smoker four an hour, then make taco meat out of it on the stove.

Mac and cheese seasoned with those seasoning packs you get with ramen noodles.

I call it MSG n cheese

I like to take two pieces of toast and stick a piece of bread in the middle.

Macaroni and cheese + corn + hotdog/sausage/other meat product here.

The corn gives it a nice, mild crunch.

Doritos with grapes

The crunch of the chip with the juicy burst of the grape is culinary art

I took my stuffing recipe and removed the bread part from it and then mixed that into some bread dough to make a loaf of stuffing.

Then I took that and used it in my original stuffing recipe to create DOUBLE STUFFING

i invented peanut butter fudge when i was 8 or something by mixing condensed milk and peanut butter and nuking it

>paint a tortilla with a thin coat of Worcestershire sauce
>microwave until leathery texture
>chew on for a while
>cry inside

>>7474594
kiramake

kidney beans + ramen noodles + mayo + ketchup

Shit's delicious senpai

>>7474708
>beans
GTFO PANSY LIBERAL SCUM REEEEEEE

I invented dipping ready salted crisps in chocolate mousse

>>7474594
I was the first to think of mixing fire into meat to intensify the flavor. I'm also responsible for salt but I'll admit that one was partially a collaboration with my homeless friend Mikey.

There is no new food, only new chefs

>>7474714
Not the mayo and ketchup combo?

I love dipping my sandwich into my frosted flakes tbqh familia

I actually invented (or perhaps discovered) a thing I like to call "smoking"

One day, I had a pork shoulder on the kitchen table (which is in the center of my house) when I started to smell smoke. Turns out, someone had went around the exterior of my house with gasoline, and lit it. Naturally, I got the hell out as fast as I could and called 911. Since I live in a mansion, it took 8 hours for the firemen to put it out, and the only thing left untouched was my kitchen. When I walked in, I saw the pork shoulder. It looked delicious. I took a bite, and I couldn't believe it. I wasn't even mad about the fire anymore. Since then, I've started "smoking" foods with a custom thing I built that I call the "smoker." I've smoked meat, fish, and even cheese.

>pic related, it's the smoker

>>7474616
>Can i have the recipe sometime?

>>7474752
has anyone called you a cunt today? or is that duty on me?

>>7474594
I put guac in queso years before I started to see it everywhere. Gueso, as it were.

I eat my spaghetti with guacamole, does that count?

>>7474763
What's wrong? Does the concept of indirect heat bother you, friend?

>>7474594
Don't tell me you think you invented an egg in toast... you must be baiting, no one is that delusional...

I make hamburger helper without any hamburger

I call it, Helpless

I put sriracha and bacon between two pieces of Ezekiel bread. I call it the Meme'wich™© (All rights reserved)

American Poutine.

I throw some baybels onto fries and douse it in Bush's baked beans

Sliced hot doggies are optional

>>7474779

Kek

>>7474701

You brilliant madman.

I invented calling pureed frozen fruit "nicecream". I have an iceless churner but I never use it because this stuff is so good.

Me and my mother actually came up with the name "chicken fries" before Burger King made them.

>>7474594

i invented this thing where you put combustible plant material somewhere and apply friction, and it creates an orange glow that consumes the plant material. i call it a burny turny hot and handy.

i also invented the process of putting an animal carcass over it, and i call this heaty wheaty goes the meaty

>>7474779

>>7474779

>>7474594
is bregs?

>Baguette bread
>Several full slices of Onion
>Olive Oil and Vinegar
>Salt and Pepper

Stole it from some European Donald Duck comic. I didn't invent it but I've never heard of anyone else making these,
Easy and delicious. Just make sure you don't have a date the day after (who am I kidding?).

I events BBQ pizza when I was 7, and sent a e-mail to papa johns customer service about it.

I never got a reply, but 6 years later they started selling it. Fucking assholes.

I discovered aquafaba :^)

>>7474594
>haven't even read the thread
>know that OP's image is EZ B8

Time to see how right I am.

>>7474594
Birds nests

GOAT

>>7474594
It probably exists, but I have never heard of it.
Parsley soup: sautee onions and garlic in butter until golden, add some corn starch, add chicken broth, about half a cup of dry parsley, salt, black pepper, red chilies and let it boil for an hour.
Whisk eggs and slowly add them onto the soup through a strainer. Sometimes I add mushrooms.

http://www.vice.com/read/the-gross-aesthetic-of-reddit-bros-and-their-food-hacks-492

>>7474604

I normally wrap ham around Salt & Vinegar chips.

But if you straight up ballin', prosciutto wrapped around some Sourcream & Onion.

Thug life.

>>7474594
when i was in elementary school i started dipping the school french fries into chocolate pudding.

>>7474667
>Totty Mac

>>7475027
Dayum this doesn't sound bad anon. Instead I'd use fresh parsley not dried. Also adding the eggs in like that sounds great. I'll have to try it sometime.

>>7474701
fuck you the backle is my recipe

>>7474600
I do balogna wrapped pickles. I have pregnant woman cravings apparently.

mix slow cooked pork belly with korean cho-jaang, thin sliced onions, and scrambled into eggs. serve with avocado slices, cilantro and kim chi over rice. mm mm good.

>>7474701
Lol. It's like "stuffception!" XD

I took a leftover cooked hamburger patty, crumbled that shit, heated it up, made tacos. #makeitataco

>>7474600
I wrap different cold cuts together, but do you crush the chips in the middle?

I used to mix eggnog with orange juice to make some kind of orange creamsicle drink.

>>7475202
Yeah. It probably tastes better that way, but I dry my plants in order for them to last longer.
Try the egg thing, they become sort of eggy-noodles.

OP is dis u

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dgIJH3oN-O4

I saute diced apples in butter, a little sugar, and cinnamon and pour it over oatmeal.

I just thought of this but wouldn't a chili cheese omelet be good?

I make my grilled cheese with olive oil instead of butter.

I make a grilled cheese without the cheese.

I call it a Grilled Cheeseless™

>>7474785
>bacon is a meme
Found the vegan

>>7475348
So you renamed toast?

>>7475351
No, it's a Grilled Cheeseless™

>>7475361
Yeah, toast with a stupid name is still toast.

>>7475379
Toast is made when you toast bread.
A grilled cheeseless is when you make a grilled cheese without cheese.

>>7475379
>>7475351
i know anon's joke isn't the best, but you don't have to be such an autist about it

Chicken parm sandwich but replace the bread with two slices of cheese pizza

I kissed a girl once and I liked it.

>>7474779

>>7474779
reddit

>1/2 hawaiian roll
>peanut butter
>sauerkraut
>malt vinegar
>sprinkle of kraft mac n cheese powder
>other 1/2 of hawaiian roll

super saiyan sliders, the only god-tier lunch

Get a spoonful of peanut butter and stick a green olive on it and eat it.

It's delicious.

>>7474686
Bread toastie huh? I prefer the toast sandwich myself

>>7474594

My grandfather invented this. It's a good comfort food.

>2 Toasts
>Peanut Butter
>Fried Egg
>Raw Onions
>Salt (optional)

>>7474779

Well I've made it with half the recommended meat and let it thicken more, it's makes it super tasty.

Crunchy cheese sandwhich
Put american cheddar on bread and microwaved till cheese got hard, top with ketchup

>>7475555
>>7474779
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ggJea4CIltE

>>7475572

>>7475572
Did he take his actual channel down? I can't find it

I created the tomato sandwich, it's just a sliced tomato with mustard and black pepper on white bread.

Also created it's close relative, the tomato and Swiss sandwich, which is exactly the same thing, but with a slice of Swiss cheese on top.

Goes well with water, beer, or a coke, so it is perfect for any occasion.

>>7474627
Are you on the wikipedia entry for Gastro-?
If not tell me the story

>>7474594
hot dog bun
banana
nutella one side
peanut butter other side
whipped cream
im high as fuck

As a kid, whenever I went to the movies, I would eat M&M's with my pretzel.

>>7475773
Oh, I also used to wrap shrimp chips in fruit by the foot.

THE SPAGHETTI SANDWICH

Make some spaghetti and slap it between two slices of garlic bread.

carbs on carbs for days, mah niggas

I invented milk

>>7475027
>dry parsley

fresh one is too strong for you I suppose...or where are you living? Antarctica?

>>7475239
or you are just drunk...

>>7474600
potato chips as in fries or potato chips as in crisps
>they're all potato
>all of them that aren't shit are probably fried
>if they're not shit, they should be crisp too
send help

I put unflavored protein powder on oatmeal.
I cry as I chew.

>>7475873
>walking through Barcelona
>pass by unextraordinary paella place
>friend points out something he had on last visit
>proprietor runs out and begs us to eat there
>say we already ate
>insists we get something to go
>meanwhile the homeless just sit there
>go to Paris and it's inverted

Why is this?

>>7475349
Do you ever talk to real people? If you start a conversation with anyone below the age of 40 who eat bacon 9 out of 10 will say "bacon makes everything better." It circulated on the internet and now it's quoted by most people who have heard it and tried something that came as a result of it. Pretty much bacon wrapped anything, weaved bacon mats, anything stuffed with bacon, and there are even things like bacon infused liquors that are easy to find. You don't see beef, chicken, duck, deer, fish, etc infused alcohol. There's the meme.

Thank epic meal time, or whatever it was called. The one where the bros cook everything with bacon and jack Daniels.

>>7475351
Toast is toasted, while it's safe to assume a grilled cheeseless(tm, can't make the symbol) is pan seared, and only on one side of the bread touches the pan.

>>7475417
Fag

>>7475886
>real people
>I learned everything I know about the "real world" from youtube
You're not fooling me, pepe
Time to empty the piss bottles

>>7474594

I baked an ice cream, confirm was good

I like to fry some alien beans with promethium
I call it "Sautémperor"

>>7474752
They've smoked fish and meats for hundreds of years.

toast
fucking butter that shit
then promite
slice tomato and not shitting line slices
lots of pepper sprinkle of salt
spring onion on top

mac and cheese plus grapes

>>7475883
Because Spain is experiencing record jobless and unemployment, and Paris is no longer owned by the French

>Nordic School Years Edition

Putting BBQ spices on buttered Crispbread

Yeah buddy

>People missing the irony in the posts of this thread

sometimes I put a piece of chocolate and a roasted marshmallow between two graham crackers. not sure what to call it

>>7476370
I bet this is Greece's fault somehow

>>7476379
i remember the cool kidz snorting bbq spices

>>7474594
Your bitch ass saw this made on v for vendetta don't bullshit us you fuck

>>7475691
Yes. He was mad with youtube for some reason.

>>7476385
half of /ck/ gets triggered and mad very quick. Lot of fun threads get reported and b& all the time. It's like they hate fun!

>>7476409
My friend snorted that salmiak hockey powder and got such a nosebleed they had to send him to the infirmary.

good times.

>>7475271
Yes! I make it with chipotle salt and Cajun seasoning

>>7476385
ironic shitposting is still shitposting

this thread sucks

>>7476466
>Reddit. The post

So you come here for serious discussions?

>>7476466
Stay on topic then, cuck

I crack eggs in a pan with the intention of making eggs over easy, but when I fuck up in flipping them I just throw them around and let them go wherever and then throw steak rub and garlic on it
I call it an eggslosion

A tablespoon of sugar stirred into milk.

I call it Sweet Milk

>>7476627

That's not an unreasonable expectation to have, considering we have rules here and the topic we have on hand. Why actually have shit above everything else?

>>7476466
>>7476385

You understand also we're in /ck/, not any of the big boards right? We can have serious and non serious topics to discuss as long as they are on the topic of foods and cooking, which this thread was until you tried to derail the thread.

>>7474846
Damn, I remember this comic! :D
Remember to market it to your friends with the "Secret Spice"

>>7474667
You missed a great opportunity, anon.

>>7474594
Sometimes I make an ice cream sundae with a banana instead of ice cream.

>>7481128
Amazing

>>7474786
that hurts

>>7481128
fuck

I rescind my shitty name and hereby give you all creative control and rights to profits

I work in a stamping plant that has these free foam ear protectors and I always have tons of them in my pockets at the end of the day.

So on weekends I make hot chocolate and put the foam ear plugs in and watch Peppa Pig videos.

I call it my Quiet Time Coco

i boiled some frozen peas in a bowl with bacon and blue cheese and ate it with a spoon

it wasn't as good as i thought it would be

at least the dog enjoyed it

>>7481683
Well, dogs also like to lick their own asses and roll in shit so they're not exactly the pinnacle of taste standards.

>>7481699
my dog is picky

he doesn't like rabbit, oysters, scallops or pretzles

>>7481128
>>7481631
Rights granted back to you. Just make macintots great again.

>>7475557
the cheese isn't suppose to get hard, my friend

So I make this dish, which through an auto correct error is named "Proclamation Chicken".

Thins slice chicken breasts
2 slices thin prosciutto per breast piece
one container baby bella mushrooms
one container beef stock (or home made which is obv better)
flour
marsala wine
salt and pepper to taste
~ Wrap each breast piece with two pieces of the thin sliced prosciutto and dust in flour. Add to a medium heat cast iron skillet and turn once after first side is browned. Work in batches if need be. Remove from skillet and set aside to rest. Add bacon drippings (YOU ARE ON /ck YOU HAVE THEM SAVED) and mushrooms until they have reduced in size and sweated out some moisture. Add enough flour to coat them evenly, and then add about a cup, cup and a half of the marsala wine and stir until the alcohol burns off. Add enough stock to make a thin gravy like sauce. salt and pepper to taste, and then toss in previously cooked chicken a moment before serving. How's that?

>>7474594

I got one that I synthesized completely by accident.

It was a really rainy day and I had just gotten my personal pizza and bottle of soda (was in college at that time). Ran through the rain back to my dorm. I had my personal pizza opened up and ready to eat, and then opened my bottle of Sprite. Predictably, it fizzed fucking everywhere. After ten minutes of cleaning up the mess, I realized it soaked the crust underneath the pizza. I was ready to be pissed off until I took a bite to see if I could ignore. I couldn't ignore it, it was actually somewhat interesting to feel a subtle lemon-lime crust mix with the cheap pizza cheese/sauce.

And that's the story of why I had no friends.

>>7481745
How do you save bacon grease?

>>7481888
Wow I have had a few and should have gone to bed but was waiting for a comment on my recipe... but yeah you just save the drippings from bacon in a container. Idk I just use an old bowl myself, my mother uses an old peanut container I think

>>7475751
My nigga, i do banana hot dogs all the time. I use jelly or jam to simulate ketchup and PB on the bread

>>7481888
Here in the Bible belt we pour that shit in mason jars when it's still warm, and stick it in the freezer/fridge.

By "we" I mean me and my grandma, rest her soul.

An omelette stuffed with onions, turkey meat and tomatoes. Then you take a tortilla and melt cheese on it in a separate pan. Take the omelette and put it on top of the tortilla on the pan and roll it up until the sides get crispy. Cut and serve.

I call it an egg quesadilla roll up.

Pb between two fruit poptarts, it's like an american pbj. Also works pretty well with toaster strudels, you can add or keep off the icing (if you add it it looks like cummy poop, you're welcome)

Pb with cinnamon toast crunch between two cinnamon toast eggos

Ice cream mixed with milk (Yes, a milkshake, but my lazy ass did it in a bowl instead of a blender) used as the milk for cereal. Works really well with captain crunch imo.

No i'm not fat, I just smoked a fair amount of weed in my younger days.

>pic related
Here's a great recipe from when I was growing up!

>2 breads
>squirting of ketchup on this bread
>squirting of mayo on that bread
>slap your breads together
>enjoy!

Also, mixing ketchup and mayo is a great dipping sauce. Discovered by accident one day, can you believe it?

>>7481915
a coffee cup or clean tin can covered with a piece of tin foil works great for the savvy bachelor

>>7482151
>50 cents
Why would one pay for condiments? Get on my level, you get as much "honey" and sugar packets as possible and make your own booze with it. Yes I've done it. You can use a 20oz bottle and a balloon for an airlock. I filled it about a little more than 1/4 full of a "honey" and sugar mixture from nothing but packets FO FREE NIGGA, put in some bottled water about half an inch from the top, and put in a tiny amount of fresh bread for yeast. Let it sit there for a few hours opened up, then "airlock" it and wait for a couple weeks. Carefully pour it into a fresh bottle and chill it. It's drinkable!

FREEE BOOZE

>>7475069
>matsu on every board

This is the future I choose

>>7474594

I call it USA #1 tomato noodle casserole

>>7482151
>mixing ketchup and mayo is a great dipping sauce.
Congratulations, you've invented Marie Rose sauce.
Fucking Millennials.

>>7474694
I do mac n cheese with peas and home made meatballs.
Also, mac n cheese with coconut yogurt and steak bits marinated in a soy sauce mixture. Surprisingly delicious!

I made this on a whim, /ck/ seemed to like it when I made it years ago.

>>7474594
i use big salad leaves, put a hamburger on it, spoonfull of baked onion and some raw bell pepper, then i wrap it up in the salad leaves.

its really messy to eat but i like it.

Does anyone else do peanut butter and butter sandwich on blueberry waffles? Or white bread

>>7475572
Say whatever you want about the guy but his kitchen is spotless

>>7474594
Corn Pie.

>>7482198
>It's drinkable!

So is mercury, anon.

I had some leftover cole slaw in the fridge and not a whole lot else, so I synergized it with 2 slices of bread and Nutella.

For no reason other than that I would be able to eat a nu-cole sandwich

>>7482337
It's the future we need.

>>7474647

so you put marshmellows and cereal inside meatballs

>>7475572
Does anybody know how much salt is in one package?

>>7474594
I make similar to your pic related for breakfast all the time. But, I bake mine and don't cut thru the bread.

Pic related. I'm sure there has to be someone else out there that makes them this way.
Butter your bread, flatten out a center with the back of a spoon, sprinkle edges of bread with shredded cheese, crack the egg into flattened center. Salt pepper. Bake at 350 12-15 minutes. (Depends on size of bread but 12 min is perfect for me) you still have a little runny yolk but the white is totally cooked thru.

I don't know if anyone else makes these but here goes.

I can jalapeños with bread and butter pickle brine every summer and they are freaking amazing.

i put a slice of goat cheese on 1 inner side of my bread and toast it then i put it on top of my eggs making a sandwich with just 1 innerside of grilled cheese

>>7474779

I invented tuna salad with chips in it. just make a regular tuna mix and cover it with a layer of chips.

I call it Chips and Fish

this literally food drugs

>>7483264
that yogurt is probably the best yogurt i've ever had in my life.

>>7483634
Get on my level, pleb

>>7474594
I found that if you mix flour, water, salt, yeast, and a bit of sugar for the yeast to feed on, you can leave the result lying around for a while and then stick it in the oven for a while longer to produce something like raw toast, except it isn't in slices.

>>7483860
Because it's impossible to have enjoyed both.I bet that's the only Aussie style yogurt you've tried.

>>7483860
it seems too expensive for me so I haven't tried it yet. I'll seriously consider it though, thanks for the input. Any recommended flavours?

>>7483870
if you mix flour and water you can make flatbread

>>7483901
Good yogurt can get a little ridiculous in terms of price, yeah. That said, I feel Noosa is more worthwhile than a lot of yogurt out there. Honestly, a container of Noosa is like two servings of yogurt. I like their strawberry-rhubarb a lot.

>>7483919
A container of the greek gods stuff is at least five servings, nevermind how good it tastes. if you can find it, please try it. I don't think I've had anything beyond the honey flavour.

I'll try the strawberry-rhubarb, thank you.

>>7483889
I live in Australia and am pretty sure there's no such thing as "Aussie style" yoghurt.

Lower Nobility toast: Make french toast, just with
sauce-gingerbread, instead of toast
.
Upper Nobility toast: ... and soak the gingerbread in pancake dough instead of the normal mix, for some extra sweetness.

Serve with sugar and cinnamon!

>>7474647
Do you mean you mix just cereal and marshmellow, and put it in a ball? Like rice crispy treats? Or do you make meatballs, like for spaghetti, and add cereal and marshmellows? I hope its the former

>>7481667
I appreciated this post anon

>>7475572
he's the richard d. james of hamburger helper

>>7482198
I used to work at McDonald's and had access to tons of that shit... If only I'd known then...

A tabasco ketchup sauce, I called it the rio grande.

>>7484203
I cackled

I threw cheddar on my laptop, call that mac and cheese

>>7474726
underrated post

>>7482765
>>7484081
the fpormer

>>7482811
I've never seen them made like that and didn't know you could do this in the oven. Thanks.

>>7484512

>>7483012
This pic makes me laugh way harder than it should

10/10

>>7475572

I'm seriously disappointed there was no plating up or tasting.

>>7481667
that's adorable

I invented eating a taco this way.

>Boil a serving of tagliatelle until it's a little under al dente
>Meanwhile, pop a good amount of pancetta in a wok on high until the grease melts out
>Fry some seasonal vegetables, fishcake and beancurd in there as well
>Meanwhile, mix up a batch of the 'proper' carbonara sauce, without any cream. Use pastured eggs if at all possible. Add a squirt of soy sauce and a shitload of black pepper
>Throw the boil pasta into the wok and get dat maillard effect going on it
>Let cool, then stir in the sauce

It's like a cargo cult version of char koay teow. Really want to try that shit again.

>not being serious in a troll thread

>>7485921
>implying this is a troll thread

I invented the peanut butter and meme sauce sandwhich

>>7482151
I make those. I call it a Sadwich

>>7475883
what do you mean paris is inverted?

wonton wraps filled with mexican stuff
>mashed beans, rice, cheese ground beef
and
>chicken, asparagus and pepperjack cheese
deep fried

>>7486531
you really knocked that one outta the park. freaking boo

>>7474653
>eating anything with your hands
Are we fucking troglodytes? Your invention is shit.

It's called the "crocodile appetizer", because even a crocodile would eat it.

>>7487316

>>7474779

I used genoa as a pizza topping and sometimes have some left over, so genoa wrapped hotdogs.

Also tried applying it to the outside of a grilled cheese sandwich before frying. Works, but makes your hands really greasy while eating it.

>>7474701
el oh el

>>7487316
Crocodiles are not picky so you need to stop saying things like that.

>>7474594
Dipping sharp cheddar cheese slices into hersheys chocolate syrup.

Strangely satisfying

>>7474779

I giggled

>>7484203

>>7483901
Blueberry is bomb

Pan fry some onions, take some thin burger patties, and steam them in the onion juice with the buns.

Makes for some tasty ass burgers.

I call them onion burgers.

>>7487316
More like "I was high on krokodil" appetizers

>>7481888

>File
>Save As "bacon grease"

vita-weat + cream cheese + polish sausage

Behold gentleman.
I have domesticated the aurochs.

>>7481940
Holy fuck. The sides are shit but that roll thing looks delicious.

I invented subway.

Had a bread and a sausage. Told myself this is pathetic. Added salad. Added cheese. This still sucks. Toasted it. Salt and pepper.

Hey this is Subway

>>7474653
>>7474653
did you also invent the white stuff on there?

>>7474594
I actually made a dinner secretly called "mother in law please go home dinner". It involves a stew made out of 10 bhut jolokia peppers and 1 sheep brains with 100 grams of cloves. Then as a desert I serve toothpaste icecream with a blue cheese sauce and liquorice. She still stayed I'm all out of ideas.

Kfc omelette

>>7474779

>>7488852
you should use a orange juice reduction for the top of the ice cream next time

>>7489210
You can't reduce a juice, dumbass

>>7474658
What is fairy bread?

>>7474726
Yes!

somebody else has probably done it before, but I make french onion ramen:
thinly slice a small onion, put it in a small pot with some oil/butter/whatever and cook it until it's dark brown and there's lots of brown onion gunk stuck on the bottom. Take the onion out and make ramen (beef works best) in the pot, make sure to stir it a lot to get the brown onion gunk stirred in. Then add the onion back in.

>>7474752
So... You live in a mansion, or *liveD* in one... And your smoker is a metal barrel in the yard/driveway and not in the walled backyard of your castle?

Nice try, but the people here are too smart for your particular brand of shenanigans. We know that's not really your smoker.

>>7474779
LOL! That was brilliant.

>>7474821
I'm running on only a few hours right now so I find this exceptionally funny right now.

Mustard Beans

Whenever you have baked beans, spoon in a huge dollop of english mustard.

>>7475337
That sounds amazing... I've seen cinnamon apple oatmeal but this probably falls somewhere between apple pie flavor and caramel apple.

>>7475351
You are forgetting that we are talking about pan-fried, pre-buttered toast.

>>7476323
>>7489528
2new4me

sliced salami smothered in black pepper with a splash of dijon mustard, rolled into little salami burritos. i call it "Disgusting". 8/10 eat whenever i can afford.

>>7475572
>>7475594
>>7484599
Don't forget about Part Two!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jIp9T25-iz8

>>7476434
Haha I've snorted my share aswell. I have also smoked chocolate cigarettes and chewing gum cigarettes.

>>7482683
How good this may look, I get associations to tat pecure of the cancer puss meat picture from the stuff comming out of the patty

>>7489451

>>7489818
Actually sounds good, senpai. Can I add some rosemarry?

My sister and I once made a batch of dark chocolate and white chocolate chip cookies. I called them sibling cookies.

Not particularly creative, but it's something I've never seen before.

>>7491141
>sibling cookies
Are you the Power Twins or something?

>>7491174
Nah. Just siblings with different views on chocolate. We came together for one recipe.

>>7483928
I'll get on it as soon as I can, thanks for the recommendation.

>>7483931
Oh, there definitely is. At least, that's how things are marketed. I guess you would know better than I would though being that you actually live there. But there are definitely differences in traditional yogurt preparations between different countries. Icelandic style yogurt for instance.

>>7474779
kek

>>7474594
I stole potato tacos from some mexicans and say i invented it

>>7491528
papas tacos are pretty good, especially since salsa just absorbs into the potatoes. i hope you fry the shells or serve with crema

>>7491743
>shells
get out

>>7474616
Nice

i combine german käsespätzle with chili con carne. just awesome. Or in bacon wrapped maultaschen (big german ravioli) with baked beans and egg. pic related!

>>7476434
I remember "Takis" We're banned at our school after someone crushed them and snorted them and the same thing happened. I guess they also fucked up their sinuses pretty bad. Goddammit people are stupid

Bologna with some rice in the middle
Microwave and the bologna will curl into a bowl shape
Now I have rice with a bologna bowl
wa la

>>7491995
I gotta admit that looks comfy af

>>7492090
This kid I knew in high school snorted 2 pixie sticks at a football game. He ended up throwing up on the side of the field. And they paused the game to check on him. I didn't smoke weed.

Oh, so this wasn't an actual thread, huh?

>>7492196
Eww?

>>7492636
I was 8 years old. Give me a break

>>7492691
Break given senpai

Make a glass of Orange Kool-Aid and mix some of it into mac and cheese.

>>7494400
I'd rather Mac with cheese, and sprinkle in some orange zest

>>7474594

I invented stake sandwiches. Takes two stakes, put some shit in between them and pretend the steaks are bread. I like to pretend I'm sticking the stake into a witch

>>7474594
bitch you better not be thinking you invented
>egg in the hole
>egg in the basket
>toad in the hole (yes i know its used for york pud primarily but its also called that here)
>million other names around the world.

I like making mine then putting a bit of Worcestershire sauce on top with some cracked pepper.

>>7474700
Grape tomatoes I can see. Grapes, no.

I invented omurice when i was 8. Got really mad when i saw it was a thing in Japan, actually.

I wrap a soft she'll around my hard shell taco, I call it a crunch surprise.

>>7474752

It would have been funnier if you said you pile meat into the kitchen of a mansion and then burn the mansion down

I put cake icing on toast.

I call it caketoast

I use cauliflower and blend it as a rice substitute for pork fried rice, it's herd to tell the difference

When I was poor I used to dip baby carrots into ground coffee. It tastes better then you might think.

>>7489463
Australian white trash snack which is buttered bread with sprinkles.

Use nutella instead for maximum contemporary

Cowboy dog - bacon wrapped hot dog topped with baked beans and fried onions

>buy a pack of freeze pops or whatever the fuck you want to call them
>DONT FREEZE THEM
>drink vodka until you have about 3/4 of a bottle left
>pick a color of freeze pops and pour all of the pops with that color in the vodka
>shake
>throw in freezer for a few hours

>spread butter on a flour tortilla
>dust with cinnamon and sugar blend
>drizzle chocolate syrup
>microwave for 20 seconds

>>7474778
Ah! You he took the bait! Look everyone, he took the bait!

fried egg
saurkraut
toats
kale
worchestire
hot sauce
pepper
salt

>>7494763
Dude I invented this like 10 days before V for Vendetta

>>7495826
LUL

>>7481743
I did it thay way originally but i overdid it with the yime once and i like the way it tasted.

Sometimes I'll make a tortilla with butter, cinnamon and sugar on it then roll it up really tight. It's like a poor man's churro.

>>7474779

>>7474594
I do something like this, but instead I scramble up the raw egg, mix it with some cream and a bit of cinnamon, then let it soak into the bread before putting the bread in a skillet. its delicious. i call it american toast

I put potato chips in my mankoushe

>>7474594
bologna sausage with nutella on it
I ate it very often as a child

>>7491995
What's your Chili con Carne recipe?
I'm trying to mix mine up.

>>7474752
thats edgy

>Boil fish heads with fish sauce and fish stock and fish feelings. Put the stock in the fridge to become gelatinous overnight
>Fry day old rice and white fish in gochujang, sweet soy sauce and oyster sauce with scallions and tons of garlic
>Pour the jelly over the hot rice
Firecracker fish porridge. It's delish.

>freeze a box of chocolates
>tempura batter the frozen chocolates
>deep fry
Deep fried turkish delight is my favourite.

Smartfood or like the old dutch orange chedder popcorn.
A mars bar.

You eat them at the same time. I call it Cheese: Mars.

Dipping a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in chili. My family has been doing it since forever. Don't know if we invented that shit or not but it's delicious.

I buy two thin crust supreme pizzas from Dominoes and place one topping side down on the other, I call it my Dominoes quesadilla

>>7495729

>>7481706
IT'S GONNA BE GREAT FOLKS

When I was in middle school I tried making the chocolate bomb from Runescape for a cookbook project. Everyone played Runescape so I called it a choco bomb so no one would notice.

I would probably be suspended for making a choco bomb now

>>7497326
cool recipe ahmed

>>7492090
You can do that with anything, though. The school should have banned everything in existence to stop students from crushing stuff and snorting it.

>>7495729
oh boy

>>7474779

>>7475889

alt 0153

This post was brought to you by Subway™

>>7474600
Mein neger. I like to put chips into my salami sandwiches. I like the crunch.

>>7497009

I invented the twice-baked potato bowl. When you scoop out the potato innards into a bowl and mix it with whatever shit you put into your potatoes, you decide, "Fuck it, I'm not going to scoop that shit back into the potato skins." So you dice the skins up, put em into the bowl and stir em around, and just bake the whole bowl.

This one isn't even that bad but it makes me feel like a real piece of shit.

>>7474594
red beans gnocchi

>>7474752

The only thing you have smoked is a cock

>>7496778
i use ground beef, oxtail, dark beer, beef stock, salt, pepper, of course different chillis, onions, garlic and at the end some dark chocolate. sometimes chipotle too. and yes, sometimes beans also - dont cry my beanless texas friends

>>7497973
and herbs, cumin too

>>7497973
where do you get your oxtail breugh

jamaican oxtail is my CRACK

like how crack is jamaican people's crack

>>7482151

Salsa golf has been a thing for nearly half a century.

I want to do one, but I am not sure how to go through it yet.
The gist of it is that Turkey, butter, strawberry jam and cornflakes for who knows mix well.
So I want to do Turkey meatballs, with butter around them, cornflakes chips on it and dipped in Jam....should they be cooked in butter?

>>7497978
what do you mean? i buy my oxtails at the normal butcher. nothing jamaican

>>7475060
>fourth grade
>go to friend's house all the time
>his mother never cooks
>one day she makes them chicken nuggets
>"Oh boy! Do we get pudding?"
>mother gives us all pudding
>watch in horror as this family all dips their chicken nuggets in pudding
>I do it so as not to be the odd one out

Disgusting.

One time I wrapped a Milky Way in a chocolate chip waffle and put some whipped cream on it.

My wife invented 'two generation chicken'. It's mouthwatering bitesized pieces of chicken breast, scrambled in eggs.

>Mmmmm
>Like steeping a lamb in its mother's milk.

Some morning sandwich that consist of a filet of tilapia (nuked because lazy) and a slice of american cheese between two fired eggs. Bread is toasted

>>7498147
Nice try, Senpai

>be at friend's house
>playing vidya
>his sister comes home, offers to make us food
>she's fat so I know did goin be guud
>cuts up hot dogs & carrots into coins
>opens up fridge and pulls out 2 in-n-out spread packets and 3 papa John's garlic butter sauce tubs.
>mixed all the sauce in a bowl
>slowly coats each hotdog/carrot coins in the puke colored sauce
>lays them on a baking pan coated with coconut oil
>bakes them while we vidya more
>she brings us a plate full
>they smell awful
>©an't bare to take a single bite
>tubby says "heh more for me anon"
>never eat at friend's house again

Not really anything new, but made a killer sweet potato ice cream with a bourbon caramel pecan swirl and marshmallow bites

>>7499189
Gimmie dat recipe desu

>>7474752
You got them good. 7/10

>>7475319
What sort of orange juice? Pulp or no pulp?

>>7482198
How much time have you spent in jail?

>>7498032
Probably.

>>7474726
you sir, have the soul of a poet

>>7475594
Graham MOTHERFUCKEN' Chapman in the house ladies and gentleman