/ck/ - Food & Cooking

I wouldn't have this sperglord cook me a goddamn thing. He'd fuck it up with his own little special snowflake spin on it.

>>7198254
mcdonalds

>>7198254
that sexy fish stew recipe from a while back

>>7198254
It doesn't matter. Everything will taste the exact same. Ruined by the excessive amount of seasoning he uses.

>>7198257

I'm sorry you ran out of tyson chicken fingers and burned your kraft mac and cheese earlier but you don't need to take it out on john

Salted Caramel Custard.

some off the hookah shakshuka

>>7198254
Ortolan bunting.

something with duck. or maybe seafood.

something vegan

I wouldn't let him cook anything.

After all, I'm the Thomas Pynchon in my apartment's kitchen.

One egg
Sunny side up
Quartered into 4 equilateral pieces
Seasoned differently on each piece

>>7198254
his eyes
is he a vampire?

>>7199214
Autism: the post

>>7199176
you're the norman bates of your cooking space

>>7200081
And I do my shopping at Freddy Kroger - where the prices aren't the only thing getting slashed.

>>7200081

When making your meatballs, you are the Tom Cruis-A of your le creuset

Omelette.

>>7198254
He got me back into cooking with some of the easier recipes on his channel but when I first started I fucked up the fondant potatoes one in a few ways and they turned out awful, so I'd have him make me these and verbally abuse me whilst doing so.

>>7201071
You had me watch the video, even if I was already subbed at that time I forgot that his intonation was that different, I understand why people find it annoying now.

Also I prefer Ramsay's fondant potatoes recipe, less waste and simpler, you should check it out.

>Hello this is chef John from
>Foodwishes.com ....with
>My fat dick on your lips
>That's right, you're gonna take my dick till I fill your nose with thick cum

>>7198254
Why does 4chan try so hard to turn this nobody into a meme?

>>7201808
>almost 1.3 million subscribers
>a nobody

>>7201808

Becuase his videos are awesome. But, I prefer his smartass side form years ago. bonus: and learn to make damn good mashed potatoes.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d6DKhmEBh54

>>7201808
because he actually knowes his shit

I can make everything he can make

>>7201947
He knows as much as the Filipino cook on a cruise ship
>>7201831
Nerdy nummies has more

>>7201959
Proof his videos are actually instructive

>>7201938
His videos are poorly edited and the audio on it sucks. You can't even hear the sound of food being cooked.
Martha Stewart makes as good food as he does.

>>7201938
yea, older videos were more normal and straightforward
but
> mfw no nutmeg in mashed potatoes

>>7201982
0/10

>>7198257

>not wanting some cayenne on your frosted flakes

>>7200040
He is jewish

He physically disgusts me sometimes with hit fatass voice and when he tries to accentuate how crispy his food is.

Fucking fat glutton has no self respect