/ck/ - Food & Cooking

Islam

>>6903042
a burger with extra crispy hasbrowns/smashed tater tots with a burger patty in between.

an eclair that looks like a dick

Chicken tikka masala burritos
It's basic and fancy sounding enough to make white people go nuts for it

the peggy hunt special tbh

>>6903230
>Reply
Sheetz/wawa did it try again

Guacamole on burgers

>>6903247
I like the word "masala"
I'd go for that shit.

elevated frito pie

>>6903042
loose meat sandwiches

or nacho cheese on everything

that white thing between Michigan and Wisconsin looks like a dick lel

>>6903290
Looks more like a dildo w/ anal spike

>>6903256
WHO THE FUCK IS PEGGY HUNT

Chilli with nothing but beans

Deep fried baked beans with a mayo sauce.

>>6903302
Some hilarious copypasta. But forreal, I'm from the midwest, and my 4th grade teacher's name was literally Peggy Hunt. Trippy.

>>6903259
okay.... a giant tater tot with cheese in the middle.

white castle sliders but instead of regular buns, baozi (steamed buns)

>>6903302
>>6903310
>Peggy Hunt is your stereotypical 48 year old woman from Pennsylvania
>She's gotten fat over the years, but still tries to tries to hide it with Walmart clothes
>She's 185 standing at 5'4
> "I have no self esteem" she mumbled to herself, looking at her fat rolls in the mirror
>Her balding husband Charles enters the room, fixing his tie in the same mirror
>"Something the matter, Peg?"
>"Oh we have that get-together later today, the one with you-know-who."
>"The Fotards?" he replied
>"Yep, the new family who moved here from California."
>Charles snickered at the way she said it
>"I just don't feel like I'm cultured enough to talk to them." She said.
>Charles had left sooner than expected, leaving her to talk to herself once more
>Some time had passed since before, it is now time to go to the outing
>She noticed Charles had some bottle sticking out of his shirt
>"Its this Adobo stuff my friends at work were talking about, says it makes meat taste good."
>"I'm taking heed to what you said before about the culture thing, Peggy."
>She smiled, as it gave her an idea
>I'll bring that bottle of expensive vinegar we got for our anniversary last year! The balsamic!"
>"Ooooooh!" Said Charles, smiling
>"That Jack guy on the YouTube always rants and raves about it! He's a professional chef you know."
>She smiled and put it in her purse
>"I'm coming for you, Rachel Fotard!"
>They had just arrived at the Smith's backyard for the cookout
>She whipped her head around to see Rachel Fotard standing feet behind her, smiling
>"Hi Peggy!."
>She laughed louder
>"H-hi Rachel, where's Cruston?"
>"He's coming, he's just grabbing my purse from the car."
>"Hi" said Cruston, almost tripping
>"Hibly dibly doo how ya all doing?"
>Nancy Smith's come to greet them
>"Now come in the back yard and see what Gaston is cooking don't ya knoooow"
>Her thick Wisconsin accent came through

>>6903247
There's a place in Berkeley called urban turban that's basically chipotle but with good Indian food. It's amazing

Southern Sushi

fried chicken skin as the seaweed wrapper
mash potatoes as the rice filling
chicken, roast beef, or any hearty Midwestern meat as the seafood
with country gravy as the soy sauce

don't know what to use as the pickled ginger or wasabi

>>6903319
whats supposed to be funny about that?

That they misidentify the Minnesota accent as a Wisconsin accent?

>>6903042
Jello salad with gummy worms in it

middle eastern food is the only food i've yet to see bastardized here in the midwest so i'm going for a family friendly mutilation of that

>>6903627
i like this

>>6903643
>>6903643

if you don't get everything that is funny about that, then i've got some bad news, anon.. it means you're the butt of the joke :(

Reminder that unless you border lake Michigan or Superior, you are not he midwest, except Iowa

>>6903709
Is it supposed to be making fun of how ignorant coasties are of life in the midwest? It seems like something some sitcom writer in hollywood who has never left Californiawould come up with. I could definitely see this happening on the Big Bag Theory with the california person in the story being that main guy in the show

>>6903719

it's just making fun of frumpy middleaged white people from the more humble states.. thinking something like balsamic vinegar would wow another person; idk man, it's just a joke.

being from cleveland and now living in seattle (giving me reasonably good perspective), it's kinda on point. but still mostly a joke to rustle faggots such as yourself.

>>6903719
>ignorant coasties

oxymoron, my friend

>>6903740
I think its supposed to be funny because that is how hipsters actually view everyone else

>>6903319
>Now come in the back yard and see what Gaston is cooking don't ya knoooow"
Thats not how "doncha know" is used

>>6903745

it really does sound like the midwest tbh fam

>>6903643
I just found it depressing. Also, my dad is named Charles and he buys adobo seasoning.

>>6903247
it would definitely sell around here. there are a FUCKTON of Indians settled in the midwest because of all the engineering work for factories. they basically import them.

>>6903263
disgusting tbh

>>6903247
I only know of one or two places near me where I could get curry and they're not popular. doubt that'd do well here

>>6903230
would eat, but I wouldn't be surprised if I saw that at a regular diner

>>6903281
so just try and make them popular outside of the area surrounding iowa?

French fries made out of other roots/tubers. Celeriac and boniato fries are the fucking bomb. Serve it with mayo, I hear they do that in Holland instead of with ketchup.

>>6903042

Cereal bars.

Like a coffeeshop but they sell a bowl of frosted flakes in milk for 8 dollars.

Hipsters would literally eat that shit up.

>>6903762
Maybe iowa.

>>6903319
I know people like this from the poor side of my town who think Napa and Marin county people are culturally superior (most of Napa is poor too, they merely work for the wealthy in St. Helena or in the tourist economy/Rural Marin what's left of it is basically wealthy city people or artists who want to be rustic)

I really wanna move to a rural midwestern town.

>>6903627
Maybe a relish

>>6903913
There is a movie already about this.

>>6903989

Moving to one is not the same as growing up in one. You wont have the authentic feel of everybody knowing you and you family, and the behind-the-back shit talking/gossiping that makes you a part of it.

Plus small midwestern towns only have 3 basic types of buildings that arent houses. That would be bars, churches and gas stations, with a family restaurant and small grocery store that struggles to compete with anything in a chain.

Oh, and its boring as fuck

>>6904561
have you looked into methamphetamine?

nighs

A gyro but with Korean food

Pizza and mustard.

It would only work though if Dr. OZ mentioned that it could make you lose inches on your waist permanently. Dr oz is key.

ITT: Taco bell focus group

medium rare tuna with a mango salsa on the side. :^)

>>6903680
H A L A L G U Y S
A
L
A
L
G
U
Y
S

There really is no such thing as the midwest anymore.

Recent food "trends"

Sriracha
Ciabatta
Pretzel roll
Ghost pepper

Thinking along these lines, my guess is another very slightly esoteric food. Still brainstorming

>>6905979
>Halal Guys
kek'd. I do wonder how often they lie about having halal meat though.

>>6903319

Why are half these people named after King of the Hill characters

>>6906027

Kimchi
Donuts
Bacon
Beer-battered anything

>>6903319
>Pennsylvania
>Midwest

>>6906038
I worked a shitty little Egyptian restaurant the owner was very adament about keeping everything halah
My first day there i interupted him praying
I didnt know wtf he was doing
Then a few days later i walked in with a bacon, egg and cheese sandwich (i know it was stupid but i was hungover and i forgot about muslims not eating pork) he made me clean the whole kitchen. Needless to say i didn't work there long.

>>6906067
Nice blog post, faget

POPPERS
O
P
P
E
R
S

>Tangerine Poppers
>Portobello Poppers
>Choco-Peno Poppers
>Pizza Poppers
>Double Cheese Poppers
>Taco Poppers
>Ghost Pepper Poppers
>Avocado Poppers
>Pickle Poppers
>Teriyaki Poppers
>Beer Poppers
>OREO Poppers
>Chilli Poppers
>Peach Poppers
>Curry Poppers
>Crab Poppers
>Tater Poppers

At least a couple of those must be good.

>>6903247
On naan!

>>6903042
>people suggesting all these ethnic foods
You realize that only a few young people with little money will eat it.

The ones who go out will think ugh poor food

Ghost peppers are a fad? Those are pretty hot for normal fags, unless you're talking about slapping the word "ghost pepper" on anything mildly spicy.

>>6906099
>unless you're talking about slapping the word "ghost pepper" on anything mildly spicy
Commodification, that's exactly what we're talking about

lefsa tacos

>>6903042
Grilled cheese donuts.

>>6906657
it's lefse

but yeah, I've actually been tempted to try this. my town has a yearly event with a low entry cost to be a food vendor, and the gyro and taco stands do quite well

>>6903643
>implying Wisconsinese and Minnesotan are that different
Hell, I grew up in MN, and I can hardly tell the difference.

>>6903042
fry up some ground beef

boil up some hot dogs

add these two ingredients to literally anything. the midwest will gobble that shit up. i know, i live there.

Wisconsin is not nearly as nice as mn. >>6906719
We are more drunk than you always.

>>6906657
Eh, it's not as great as you would think.
I make lefse every year with the ladies at church, yeah I know I'm living the stereotype, and tried it. It doesn't taste any different than a flour tortilla, and it doesn't hold up as well, unless your lefse recipe uses a lot of flour.

>>6906725
You're also fatter, though I suppose with all that beer and dairy, it's hard to stay thin.

>>6903913
First correct usage of "literally" that I've seen here in months.

>>6906739
Yes our kind is mostly over weigh. Most take great pleasure in over eating. Yet I will inform you some like myself eat reasonably and cook modestly. However our beer intake will kill a whale.

>>6903290
You mean lake Michigan. At least flyovers know geography .

>>6906027
Lived in a few states in the Midwest my entire life.

Ciabatta isn't a recent trend here, oddly enough. Nor is pretzel-everything.

The ghost peppes and sriracha is spot on though lel

>>6906760
>Fat, and drunk
I don't understand.
You're not actually taking pride in this are you?

>>6903627
>Southern
>Midwestern

pick one

>>6907179
its food that caters to the midwest
all those stuff are associated with the south
and the midwest doesn't really give a fuck
you can just take a bologna sandwich and call it a New England Sandwich
and they'll believe it and will love it

>>6906917
You obviously have never been to Milwaukee

nigger food

>>6906099
Ghost peppers are hot even for people who like heat. I'm Indian and like heat in my food but could never think of eating a ghost pepper unless it was made into a chutney. I could envision using it in normal cooking to add the heat but that'd be a waste of money. That said ghost peppers are extremely flavourful and not just pure heat.

Pytt i Panna

>>6903627
Cole slaw
Spicy Rellish

Japadogs.
they're already gaining popularity on the West Coast. That's one baby step away from hipster mania and two years away from flyover popularity.

>>6907893
gonna be hard for it to catch on because
>muh chicago dog

>>6907898
Nah, it'll take them down eventually, too. But the Chicago dog is a classic, so it won't ever go out.

www.umaihotdogs.com

>>6907898
no one outside of chicago gives a shit about chicago dogs

>implying I am not on the cutting edge of hipster food
>brick chicken
>salty salty salty
>old school creamed vegetables
>nouveau riche style casseroles
>chewy home made sweets like caramels and fruit chews
>beers that taste like childhood, ala fruit loops, and root beer
>dipping foods like fondue style, but with different types of dips

look for all of these in the next 3 years to become huge, also gochu jang, is going to be the next sriracha, and the world will keep spinning.

Cyanide Tartare, with glasscrumbs and antifreeze for garnish

>>6903957
smh tbh fam, defending the midwest

>>6903551
You try Tava yet? It's a chain Indian chipotle but it's mainly around the peninsula

fish tacos

Joey food tbh

hatch chili everything

Kvass
Kvass with peanuts

Hunt wild boar live via armed drone. Then the drone delivers the carcass to your home or workplace.

>>6910920
Heard about something on NPR this afternoon while driving about a place in Texas where they give you a couple of military grade guns and take you for a helicopter ride to mow down wild hogs (they're a vermin in fields, and it's open season all year around).

It was the most fucking Murican thing I've ever heard of.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=McQIKgd9ufk

>>6910920
>that little one that gets caught underneath it to the left and doesn't stop spasming

>>6911162
Holy crap. I never noticed that before.

>>6911162
>>6911168
It's weird when I first saw that ages ago I remember I watched it at least 30 times but I never noticed that guy. Guess I'm fucking blind.

>>6911153
Fuck yeah

>>6903319
>"I just don't feel like I'm cultured enough to talk to them." She said.
Good Lord, do Californians actually think there are people who hold them in some sort of weird reverence or awe? I've lived on both coasts and in the middle and I don't think I've ever heard people talk about them like this. At best they were indifferent, at worst(?) they actively hated them.

>>6911153
>"military grade" guns
Please stop.

>>6910906
I'd really like to try real kvass but I can't be assed to make it
tried some bottled stuff from an eastern euro market and it was pretty terrible

>>6911295
That's because kvass is terrible in general

>>6903266
It means 'mix' in pakispeak

>>6903913

There is one in London

>>6903989
Be prepared for everything to be cheap as fuck, but there's much less availability than what you'd find in a city.

No ethnic food stores or shit like that. Walmart, Alco, or a local grocery store is about it.

>>6906657
I'd love to see lefse used with savory meats and sauces. I think it'd be really good.

It's basically just a potato tortilla.

>>6903913

Uhhhh cereal milk has been a thing in NYC for almost a decade now.

>>6905998

There's a generic white trash flyover culture that stretches from the Deep South up the Chicago though. Generally stupid, fat, and proud of it.

That said they don't invent trends, they just generally adopt them from the coasts after a few years. So I'm guessing maybe cupcakes and late night noodle shops are next?

>>6913138
fucking hell I haven't thought of alco in so many years. apparently they went bankrupt recently

also mexican markets are becoming more common as more mexicans move up north. and if the town is free from that, it might have a food co-op that has more options than a walmart or hyvee would have

>>6913141
I've tried it with leftover turkey and mashed potatoes. it's really quite good. still doesn't beat lefse with lingonberry jam though

>>6912478
there has to be something to the real stuff though, right? I've heard from people who like it that bottled kvass is awful, so I'm willing to give it another shot if I ever see the real stuff available.

>>6913149
"gourmet" cupcakes have already been a thing here for half a decade. I don't get the appeal, but they're pretty popular.

the only late night thing here are bars, and I don't see that changing too soon.

>>6913837
>been a thing here for half a decade

Ahhhh ok, we've got the period down then. Gourmet cupcakes were big on the coast from about 2005-2007 - so sounds like there's about a 3-5 year delay? So whatever was huge on the coast in 2011 should be it.

So looks like it's food courts, bike delivery, and duck tacos! http://www.foodandwine.com/articles/food-trends-for-2011

>>6913837
I think Alco's are being bought out by another company which I can't think of the name of.

But also in smaller towns there will be more farmer's markets which is a good way to get fresh produce that is actually made locally.

I might move to Omaha. What's good to eat there?

>>6913945
Steak and potato. With a local fresh veg.

>>6913961

I meant restaurants, but thanks.

Chicken sashimi

>>6903247
Theres a place near angel called Bombay Burrito which does this. Went in on a whim one day and tried it. Was bretty gud

Open faced sandwiches

mac and cheese with grapes

youll thank me later

Expensive food you eat/try through your nose. It will come concentrated and in extremely small amounts that can be absorbed by your mucus membranes. Taste what you want to eat before you buy it! Ever wonder what shark fin soup tasted like? Wait no longer. Spray and taste.
Original idea -do not steal.