/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>try to get the big sticker of the canister of one of these bad boys
>get one of those things you use to remove rust and shit from your stovetop
>try to scrape the sticker of
>brilliant_idea.jpg
>hand slips
>cut right into my thumb
>bleed a whole lot
>bandage it up, probably should have gone to the hospital tbh
>keep bandage on for about a month without changing it
>take it off finger is white and looks fucking moldy
Still have a scar.
But thank fucking christ that i didnt hit the tendon.

>>6776880
heard about a guy who had to clean the filters over the fryer after the message tchen was closed... he slipped and one of his feet goes in the hot fryer ... the socks melted in his flesh .....

>>6776880

Worst injury I've ever seen...

http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/the-french-chef/n8667

>>6776892
>Cutting up thumb
Shit happens
>Leaving the bandage on for a month
DISGUSTING!
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU WORK IN A KITCHEN WHEN YOU PULL SHIT LIKE THAT?! EWWWW!
You should be ashamed of yourself

>>6776880
>Be me, working as a dishwasher at a 500 seat sportsbar/nightclub
>Gr8 kitchen, hard working proud chef is owner and runs a tight ship
>Some chefs ex cons or ex junkies, owner forgave all sins, he had been down that route aswell.
>One slow sunday, one of the chefs doing prepp for monday since its gameday and we are fully booked
>Someone shouts and he looks away just as he cuts something
>Thumb straight off
>Blood
>So much blood everywhere
>Panic and he runs, slips but catches his fall with the non cut hand
>Non cut hand catches the fucking grill
>Will never forget the smell of burnt hand and blood
>They attatched his thumb but its still fucked up to this day

>>6777069
forgot to mention i had to work 3 hours overtime and do prep aswell as bleach half the fucking kitchen

>>6776903
That made me cringe like baby.

>this thread

>just started cooking my own meals
>trying to make chicken katsu
>need to put chicken in ~1/4" of oil
>metric-raised, so I don't know what an inch is
>wind up putting ~3" in
>toss the chicken in
>it splatters
>burn the fuck out of my hand

GG, me.

>>6776903
what the fuck is a message tchen?

>>6777323
>Needs 1/4", uses 1/4'

Man. Google that shit.

>>6777332
Pretty sure it's Mess Kitchen

>>6777323
What a dumbass.

>Need to open a package
>Grab scissors
>Decide it would be a good idea to put pressure on the blade with my thumb to cut through
>Why
>Cut it, feel sharp pain, then nothing
>Thumb is pouring out blood, running down my hand, and pooling on the floor
>Wash and wrap it up

Lost some feeling in it after that, feels strange.

>>6776880
>grating a block of parmesan with a handheld grater for some dish that I can't remember
>the block is extra hard
>extra force needed to grate
>coming up on the rind
>suddenly my hand slips half motion
>grate off a few flecks of my thumb
>bleeding like a stuck pig
>can see little chunks of finger flesh in the cheese
>surprisingly no blood in the cheese
>picked it out and served it anyway
>nb

>>6776880
>be me working at burger king
>fixing up the hotlamp bulb guard which sits over the french fry puit, it normally isnt hot because the hotlamps dont heat up the sides of the grate.
>turns out i was wrong, very very wrong
>char the shit out of my hands screaming "FUCK" in front of a line of customers coworkers and manager
nothing really bad happened it healed up in a few months. i once knew a guy who worked at a mom and pop french fry stand who spilt an entire vat of hot oil all over his leg, his leg looked like freddy krueger and probably still does.

>>6777416
I love this dog

>using knife for something dangerous
>literally think i shouldn't do this
>6 stitches in finger 3 hours later

>washing a knife
>flatmate walks past me, bumps into me
>i slip
>knife goes right down to the bone of my little finger
>ouch.jpg
>reflexes mean i throw knife into air and goes down to the bone of my other little finger

really fucking hurt
>falls back down into the

>>6777445
> not having the spine of the knife facing you when you wash it
Shiggy diggy

>>6776880
>>Weirdly it was a ring pull can

That's hella common though.

>10 years old
>Decide I want instant raman
>Use a step to reach the counter and start boiling water
>As I poured the boiling water I slipped off the step

For a week I had an excuse not to do homework since my hands were in bandages

>>6776880
>work fry/grill/broil sation in high volume restaurant
>floor is a fucking wreck during service
>come to work one day to find that someone has taken my shoes
>I'm a nig too, so of course I came to work in Jordans
>have to work a 600 shift on busiest hottest station skating through sludge in tractionless basketball shoes
>tfw didn't slip and fry hands

Probably the worst I have seen on the job though (I wasn't right here when it happened, but I witnessed the aftermath) was when this obnoxious dude who worked in receiving threw out his back flexing nuts in front of the little Vietnamese pastry chick trying to move a 40 gallon lexan of hot soup by himself. The walk in had just been mopped out and he slipped. He fell back, and the lexan came down on his legs, breaking one of them. Soup everywhere. The pastry chick almost puked. She had to go home because she was so shook. He lost his job, on top of crippling himself.

I've heard TV chefs say that a blunt knife is more dangerous than a sharp one. This sounds like bullshit. Am I missing something here?

>>6776880
Look at that woman, she doesn't belong in that kitchen, she doesnt even know the oil is going to wreck her.

>>6777571
A blunt knife requires more force to do anything, which can easily lead to lopping off a finger. Think about it, would you rather work with a knfie that effortlessly slices through anything, or a knife that you have to baton?

>>6777596
this is true
i work in a deli and every time ive been cut with a knife, it was a dull knife that cut me when i used too much force trying to use it
except the one time when i sliced my thumb in the electric slicer but that wasnt a big deal

>>6777332
"kitchen" I don't know why ...my phone autocorrect function sucks...

one word; mandoline......

my litle finger sliced to the bone, needed 7 stitches , gone back to work in the same hour

>>6777472
You see it in single serving cans like soups but i've never seen it in large cans of veggies/fruits that you use to cook with

>Work in a co-op produce dept.
>In back prepping lettuce
>Chef comes to the back with her hand wrapped in a blood stained cloth
>Blood pouring down her arm
>Meat dept. guy flings open the ice machine and, with his bare hands, fills a cup with shredded ice for her.
>They stand over my pallet of watermelon, which is by the ice machine, and unwrap her hand
>Blood drips ALL OVER the watermelons
>I see her finger, it's almost de-gloved
>Feel sick
>Look at the floor
>Blood everywhere
>Tell her to go to the fucking hospital
>They leave
>Spend the rest of my day soaking watermelons in disinfectant.

Later on, Meat guy ended up fucking up his hand on the meat saw, I wasn't there that day though.

>>6777484
>10
>need a stool to reach the counter
are you a fucking midget?

>>6777571
Being this retarded
Or baiting this hard

>>6777406

Same

Had to put on super glue to stop the bleeding.

>>6777856
It's a legitimate question although I imagine said TV chef [Okay we all know it's fucking AB] would have explained it.

>>6777571
Blunt knives slip. Sharp knives don't.

>work at Noodle's & company on saute
>had giant hot water pot at other station, think fryer with water instead of oil
>use it to finish off parcooked pasta
>we have to dump water after rushes and get clean water in it
>newbie cook goes to empty it
>puts foot right under spout
>boiling water pours onto their foot
>never heard someone scream so loud before
>new grate put in front of grate because corporate says so
>never see newbie cook again

>dumbfuck goober coworker fucks up brewing coffee, leaves a whole bean in the bottom of the pot creating a plug and proceeds to put a new batch on top
>don't see this happen
>need to grab coffee, notice it's still basically empty despite having hit 'brew'
>pull the grounds pot out, it's FULL of 201 degree water that instantly splashes all over my hands, arms and shirt

thanks bud

>chopping tomatoes
>serrated steak knife
>miss tomato
>stab self in between thumb and finger
>knife stuck in my hand
>pull knife out before pain began
>commence bleeding
>call mommy and tell her
And now I have a neat scar but I didn't go to hopsickle

>>6778083
this
blunt ones you need to mash down with more force
my grandmother slipped a butterknife and fucked up the nerves in one of her fingertips

>>6778543

>tfw you will never don full chainmail armor when cooking

Why even bother.

>>6776903
I've heard this exact story at my restaurant, seems like it might be one of those kitchen legends.

I have not fucked up badly in kitchen but
>cutting thing x
>notice blood
>no pain
>see a cut on finger
This has happened multiple times and when i mention it to my friends they get confused about how can i cut my finger without noticing it. Probably only downside of sharp knives

>>6776903
Faaaack that made my skin crawl

>>6776880
>be me a couple years ago
>finally went and bought myself a high grade chef's knife
>finish chopping some veg or something.
>quick wash
>towel dry, it's regular steel, so I can't let it just air dry
>working moisture off with a paper towel, before sliding it down the edge to get it dry like a retard
>cuts paper towels just fine, btw
>doesn't hurt, but I instantly feel my skin as a separate flap
>drop knife in sink, time to staunch bleeding

it was shallow enough I didn't need stitches, but I cleaned out my first aid kit trying to get it to stop bleeding through bandages

>>6776880
When I was in 4th grade, several high school bullies held me down and gave me a paper cut across my left eyeball.

>>6778929
Are you a super villain in the making?

>Cooking in the kitchen in my apartment
>Using mandoline to slice vegetables
>Have been using the hand guard up until now, it's actually a pretty nice mandoline. It even juliennes.
>Start to do carrots
>Carrots won't work with the handguard
>"Fuck it I'll just be extra careful"
>Do 5 carrots without any issues, get cocky, slice tip off my middle finger on 6th carrot
>Doesn't hurt, won't stop bleeding. Had to put an ice cube on it to get it to stop.

"I fucking won't do that again!"

>Month and a half later
>Using the mandoline again
>It's fucking carrots again
>"Ok super duper extra careful this time"
>Change the blade on the mandoline to slice the carrots
>Finger slides along the guide and into the blade. Cuts about 2-4mm into my finger/fingernail
>I freeze and stare at it, no pain
>My brain panics and decides the best thing to do is jerk my hand away from the mandoline instead of calmly pulling my finger off the blade
>Cuts chunk out of my finger/fingernail
>Throw mandoline against wall, hold ice cube to cut in finger as I put away the ingredients and start drinking booze because "fuck it"

I will not buy another fucking mandoline until I find chain link/kevlar gloves to go with it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KSU4g2wL9Oc

2spooky

>>6778441
>Working at restaurant
>Asked to to to liquor room to get some replacement alcohol for the bar
>Agree
>Leave with case of whiskey
>Fairly heavy
>Newfag chef walking towards me not paying attention with pot of rolling water
>"Look alive bud-"
>Suddenly trips
>Time slows down
>Watch the water steaming and flying at me
>Can't do anything
>Splashes my whole right side of ym body
>Extreme pain
>Drop case of whiskey
>Lands and breaks my foot

Lost my voice for two weeks, had a broken foot, chef had pay docked and the next time I saw him he laughed at me being in a foot cast and I beat him with my crutch, breaking his nose and three of his teeth.

>>6777571
Not a chef but one thing about knives is when a blunt knife cuts you its really fucked up since its not a clean cut.
If you cut yourself with a sharp knife it is clean and not so bad

>>6778964
Negative. The leader of SHIELD.

>>6779009
>things that happened

>friend's little brother
>deep frying shit
>asks "how do you know if the oil is hot enough"
>is told to dump a tablespoon of water in it to test
>burns his hand

>>6779060
Should have told him ice cubes.

>>6779034

\

>>6779034

this is a 110% utterly believable restaurant tale the only thing wrong with it is that some little shitbird of a bar back wants us to believe it was the kitchen man's fault and not his own.

here's what actually happened

>boss yells at me to since i am lazy cokehead and let bar stock run out which is something retards can avoid
>go and grab random case of stock in hopes boss will not be at the bar when I get back
>dreamily wander through kitchen in the weeds while ignoring everything and everyone
>walk directly into line cook holding big ass pot of boiling water
>what do they need all that water for anyway
>he's hurt or something
>why do I hearing screaming
>oh i'm screaming

>had some tailbone bruises and red spots on my hand, ham it up big time for worker's comp and shit
>high school drama club ftw!!!!!
>see line cook, he's not my friend right now
>he's on crutches and shit
>I laugh at his sorry brown ass
>Juan needs to know I'm the face of the business
>something is happening to my face
>oh jesus it hurts

>working at a conference center
> at the buffet carving station
> I'm pretty good with sharpening knives with a
>steel.
> I'm fast as shit at sharpening the knife on a steel.
> miss the steel with the knife
>knife goes 1mm past the end of my nose.
> TLDR: almost cut my nose clean off while carving meat.

>>6779127
i used to work the carving station at a buffet and i've got a scar that looks like a little moon from sharpening a knife and missing the steel slightly. i bled like a stuck pig

>>6779108
>writing fanfiction on /ck/

>>6779108

stop le, le lies on /ck/ faggot

>>6779009
>>"Look alive bud-"
that isn't how you say 'HOT COMING DOWN'

i guess the old saying is true: can't learn til you burn

>>6779127

you don't "sharpen" knives with a steel, dumbass.

you hone them. you sharpen knives with a whetstone.

>>6779610
I sharpen blades with my tongue, piss nails and shit whetstones.

>Be in Crimea
>To running from puppet Ukrainian pigs
>Three tank is chasing me
>Is running through small town
>Goings down side street to escape and run into kitchen to hide
>Local Babushka give me hiding place under table
>Ukrainians have be seen me anyway
>Shootings kitchen with tank cannon
>Knife slipped off counter and cuts finger in bone, is some blood
>Heal in a month and glorious Sevastopol lies in Putin hands

>>6778975
Fucking madolines man, I hope you find a glove.
Mandolines have caused too many accidents, why we don't have better alternative?

>>6777571
True. A blunt knife requires way more force to use and can slip rather than biting in, making it comparatively very easy to cut yourself.

>in kitchen making a salad
>chopping tomatoes
>can't get a grip on the rest of the tomato
>full length of the 8 inch knife slides across my finger
>blood everywhere
>Blood kept soaking through the bandages i put on
>have scar

My kitchen smelled like blood for 2 weeks

>>6779108
i believe his tale, when it comes to fighting using weapons minorities cant touch the white man.
its why we conquered the world.

the only injury I ever remember was from working in a grocery store deli. I got a paper cut that bleed from putting away empty boxes and the manager decided it would be a good example to show 2 new trainees the proper procedure for a workplace injury using me as an example, wasting like 20 minutes of my time

>have untriggered epileptic seizure once while making caramel for a dessert for my mothers birthday
>apparently must have smacked hand off pan handle and sent it and the sugar flying, sticky spoon hit me right in the chest
>found by my flatmate convulsing on the kitchen floor, drizzled like a cake in a shitty patisserie, still wearing one oven glove
>he said he "smelt barbecue" and was brought to the kitchen by the scent scooby doo style
>realised the delicious meat smell was me being cooked by molten sugar and called an ambulance
>got doped up like crazy so i didnt go into shock and apparently argued with the paramedics about putting my tart into the oven
>still have gnarly pieces of forearm missing on one side

>>6776880
>sous chef at small but nice restaurant
>did full pastry training in CS as well as savory
>pastry chick is sick and can't come in one day, usual backups out of town/can't be reached etc
>go be pastry person on my day off
>wind up getting jostled by rookie cook rushing around without yelling behind or anything and proceed to slosh hard crack stage molten sugar down my fucking wrist and arm
Holy shit /ck/, I've worked in kitchens long enough to injure myself a time or three but that was by far the most painful. Plus the added bonus of having to fucking peel/break hardened sugar plus skin off.

>>6780366
Grocery store managers think they're fucking heroes of the world. Most of them are so god damn power crazy it's ridiculous.

>>6780425
>pparently argued with the paramedics about putting my tart into the oven
kek
Did they do it? I would have done it for you man.

Not me

>friend's parents own a restaurant
>he sometimes helps them out
>works in kitchen one day
>slips
>his left hand and entire forearm are submerged in the deep frier

This guy was jinxed. He really was.

>>6780440
Why peel it instead of washing it off slowly with cool water? Might have saved more skin that way...

>>6777532

Ouch, Christ. Wouldn't have wanted to be there when that happened.

Story from my apprenticeship

> been workin in prep kitchen
> had to make mushroom sauce, 80 litres
> burnt that shit by not paying attention
> got the stuff out, thick black burnt shit on the bottom of a big stand-alone-cooker (the one with the wheel to make it go up, so stuff can be poured into buckets)
> boiled that stuff for 30 minutes (not gonna clean that on the hard way)
> pulled out the lattice from in front of the machine, so i wouldnt have to clean that as well
> entire machine rolled into the small canal in front of it
> 40+ litres of boiling hot cleaning water went over my left arm ,+ body
> immediate shock
> continued shift due to not feeling anything
> got the cleaners into a mess since they didnt secure the wheels on the machines
> next day got driven to the doctor, since it kinda hurt
> had several spots of second degree burns and some third degree spots
> was shouted at for not showing up by my boss
> doctor wanted to send me to hospital

tl;dr: fuck working in 500 guest ,+ kitchens

>>6777571

true, I cut the top of my thumb off when I went to chop some celery really fast and I didn't want to go get my own knife because our fatass pantry cook was blocking the closest path. Used one of the dull as fuck "kitchen knives" (no idea whose they ever were, they've just accumulated over the years) and managed to cut about 1/3" of it off.

>worked in kitchens for 4 years
>didn't get anything worse than smallish cuts and burns
So lucky.

Although I have a story of something that happened to somebody else.
>work at SJW restaurant that takes in volunteers
>usually pretty nice, most volunteers are regulars and know their shit
>unrelated but I met my first (and only ;_;) gf when she was volunteering
>one day a highly motivated but slightly retarded volunteer comes to help
>prepping cauliflower, cuts himself
>pretty nasty cut, lots of blood
>bleeding on muh cauliflower
>hey bruv don't bleed on muh cauliflower, let's get you a bandage
>chef makes him wait at the bar gripping his hand with a towel so we can get the shit and take care of him
>apparently 10 seconds is all it takes to bore him
>gets up and goes back to bleeding on muh cauliflower
>throws blood soaked pieces in the big pot
>have to throw out the whole batch
>our collective faces when

This one is less traumatic. After two years working pizza with 500 degree ovens, all the hair on my right arm had gradually burned off. So I had one adult looking arm and one baby smooth girly arm.

>>6779610

>This guy
>Calling people dumb

>>6780832
thats pretty funny

>work in conference center as buffet cook. We have this guy who is constantly hurting himself. My and my buddy set up our cutting board so we can watch him work while we prep. 30 minutes later- he goes to remove pans of bacon from oven. Takes pan full of cooked bacon from top rack out of oven, pours boiling bacon grease on himself. We just shake our heads.

>>6780885

pwnd , kek

>>6780345
Should've gotten a grip

>>6778558
If you believe, you can do anything!

Happened to my friend but wasn't there

>working with a meat slicer
>no hand guard attached to it
>using hand to hold the meat as he's slicing
>thumb goes right into the slicer and is lopped off
>had it reattached in microsurgery, employer paid for everything

He's a fucking idiot.


Also, remember to always wear slip resistant shoes or covers, it's worth it.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=35q-RI_ps9w

>Be in 7th Grade
>Be in Ghetto middle school
>Home Ec class full of gangster mexicans triple my size, fully tattooed
>Be doing budget cooking because the kids were poor
>Be very weak skinny white kid
>Giant kid name angle (who is in my cooking station) Slaps my ass
>Ignore it
>He grabs my dick
>Almost start crying
>He sticks his thumb up my ass when i bend down to oven
>Tears fly out my eyes
>Slug Angle for fondling me
>Angle pulls out a knife from the drawer and stabs me in the ribs
>Instantly pass out
>Get 11 stitches, angle gets expelled
>Be back in Home Ec next week.

>be 7 years old
>want some ramen
>prepare ramen cup and put it in the microwave
>waiting for my ramen to be done
>microwave explodes
>realize I forgot to put the water in

I was fine physically but my pride was shattered.

>>6782007
Are you trying to spell "Angel"? That would make more sense since it's a typical spic name.

>>6781958
Nuh-uh fucker, you got me on my flying like Superman dream.

>>6777020
He was probably a child at the time if he was opening a damn bionicle

>>6782007
lol

Mexicans are so gay.

>cutting veg
>sudden drop of blood
Oh fuck goddamn it
>despite checking I don't see any cut
>ask coworker if my face is bleeding , it's not
>no blood on the ceiling
>check myself again
>no blood anywhere
I still don't know where it came from
I think my restaurant is haunted

>shucking corn
>yank a corn fiber right across the palm of my hand
>blood everywhere
>mfw I cut myself on corn

>>6782220
lol
nosebleed maybe?

>>6782118
Yeah my bad, i don't every write to/about mexicunts so my spellings are off.

>>6782186
The gayest

>>6782225
I blew my nose after with no blood at all, and asked mu coworker specifically about a nosebleed

>>6782223
My sister had a job detasseling corn one summer. She had horrible welts all up and down her arms and legs. Why they let kids do that is beyond me, especially considering all the gross chemicals they coat everything in.

>>6781940
kek

>>6776880
>working at domino's
>one of my first times working the oven, super busy
>take a pan of breadsticks out of the oven, put breadsticks in box
>absent-mindedly grab extremely hot iron pan with my hand
>horrible, searing pain
>tell manager
>"you'll be fine, just stick your hand in the cheese bin"
>spend rest of the night with hand shoved in cold cheese

>>6783449
>just stick your freshly wounded hand in the cheese bin
Remind me not to eat at dominoes ever again

>>6783508

Why do people make posts like this? We're you really that ignorant and assuming that poorly trained children at franchise locations were perfectly trained and haccp certified chefs? You couldn't be that stupid. Do you think it's funny to proclaim out loud that someone made an "uh-oh"? Does anyone care about your little blog post in a thread that's supposed to be about kitchen injuries? Why should anyone go out of their way to remind you anything you self inflated Alzheimer's added fuck? You're going right back to domino's tomorrow for a 3 topping large $8.99 M-F because that's what you eat every single day

>>6780425
>convulsing on the kitchen floor, drizzled like a cake in a shitty patisserie
Lel

I was working at Taco Bell and I slipped and fell in a pile of of wet floor stacked up against the freezer and fell in front of a bunch of dentist qts

>>6783522

I know you're really passionate about your 25 year service career as a loser from Domino's but your restaurant sucks, Mr poverty.

>>6778929

I chugged a bottle of Jack Daniels one night after work and slightly knicked my finger while dicing onions. Only time I've cut myself or injured myself in the kitchen though. Being drunk just makes you want to cook up some tasty greasy shit.