/ck/ - Food & Cooking

Seems to pressed 'Post' before finishing your sentence, OP. There's no fullstop there. Here, let me fix that for you:

ITT: Top-tier food personalities you want to punch in the mouth.

There we are. Fix'd!
No need to thank me. Just doin' my part.

>>6599559
This anon has it right.

Her show is just dreadful. Her cooking doesn't look that bad, but her speech (and the show in general) is so slow-paced it's aggravating.

She's like the culinary Mr Rogers, except where Mr Rogers' Neighborhood was slowed down so it could be followed by small children, Barefoot Contessa is slowed down so it can be followed by drooling housewives while they're zonked out on pain meds during the day.

>>6599698
Despite Ina being a Jew, most of her viewers are WASP women.

>pain meds
You clearly don't know many WASPs or WASP housewives. Though neither a WASP nor even American, I went to a private school in the Northeastern US, one of the top 10 (I think top 5, but I'm not 100% sure) in the country, so I was surrounded by them and their culture. Trust me: I know WASPs and what they do.

While you're right and pain meds do get abused by many, most don't go for that or, at least, not regularly. It's beneath them. The most common escapes for these vapid, depressed cunts are Benadryl, Day/NyQuil and/or alc, often together.

Ever met a loopy Episcopalian or UU woman? It's because the bitch was DayQuillin' like a villain.

Only Canadians will know about based Wok with Yan.

>>6599552
I enjoy this show.

>>6599700
I'm pretty sure he shows up drunk to some of his tapings

>>6599564

Why are liberal men so effeminate?

>>6599774

>>6599552
>Hi everyone, welcome to Barefoot Contessa
>The hubby's finally coming back, and you KNOW how he just loves his chicken
>So I'm making a delicious roast chicken basted with the tears of African children
>You should be able to find tears of African children at your local specialty store in the Hamptons
>Otherwise, you can substitute 300 oz of saffron and 100 year aged balsalmic vinegar
>Oh, that is just---oh! A delight. I think Jeffrey is going to love it.
>We'll be right back
>Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo DA DA DA DOO DA DA DA

>>6600099
>tears of african children
>not tears of dying make-a-wish kids
Ya blew it.

http://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/barefoot-contessa-turns-make-kid/story?id=13238578

http://blog.timesunion.com/amanda/barefoot-and-heartless/11391/

>>6599552
There is only one.

>>6600123
lmao what the fuck? This can't be true. Ice cold.

>>6599777
>>6600135
i really hate these 'sprinkling from high' poses that they all do.....

>>6600137
Entirely true. :-(

I fucking hate this woman. My mom watches her sometimes. The shit that comes out of her mouth.

>I prefer the ~hand blown~ wine glasses.

She's like a caricature. She's like a rich lady you'd see in a children's cartoon.

>>6600158
Clearly, somebody summers in Montauk rather than somewhere a bit more "in."

>>6600152

>>6600123
>>6600137
>>6600156
>obligation culture
Article even says she participates in other organizations.

This is the kind of shit liberals do and it makes me sick.

Like, imagine if you want to make someone look like a homophobe. All you have to do is call them, get a busy signal, and then write in your article that they couldn't be reached for comment. Then ask some janitor in the hall about it.

"Is Alton Brown a homophobe? Popular Food Network television host couldn't be reached for comment. We spoke with an employee at Food Network and they denied the rumors. What do you think? Leave your comment below."

>>6600164

>>6600173
She "didn't know" the first time, but actively rejected the kid the second.

>>6600179
Does she just have to drop everything she's doing and go see him because some liberal says she does? If she's working with other organizations, then what's the big deal?

>>6599763
>you will never get hammered with Ming before eating Asian street food and then cooking some ridiculous shit with random ingredients

>>6600186
>>6600173

You keep using the word "liberal". I live in one of the reddest of red states, and everyone I know here, even the ones who think Obama is a secret Muslim who wants to steal their guns, would be disgusted with Garten's behavior. If a sick, dying little boy want to meet you, you fucking drop everything and go see him. This isn't about politics, it's about being a decent human being.

>>6600186
She didn't have to drop anything. She didn't have to go anywhere. The kid wanted to appear on her show and be with her a few hours. That's all.
>liberal
>moshi moshi, beitto-desu

>>6600186
I don't even like liberals but this isn't a political issue.

Shame on all of you

>>6600099
Make sure it's good tears of African children

Jay Mohr isn't that funny when he does normal material, but his fucking impressions are amazing, and he does a GOAT Ina Garten.

https://soundcloud.com/mtthwcrggs/jay-mohr-barefoot-contessa

and

>>6600292
oops, forgot the second link

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xlr8em_watch-what-happens-live-impersonations-by-jay-mohr_shortfilms

>>6600261
Fucking Stellino.

>>6600177
>>6600164
>>6600135
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k1_ODDevbY8

Cmon guys

>>6600332
i never realised before how similar he and richard ayoade sound

>>6600332
adonic

>>6600332
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WXQCo9fLYWI
One of us
One of us

>>6600218
>>6600253
This is the problem with /pol/ pushing it's liberals aren't logical agenda. Both bible thumpers and bleeding hearts would agree that it's a shitty thing to do. Not neo-libertarians though they seem to think they're above such petty things as emotions.

>>6600603
>neo-libertarians
People don't even read books anymore let alone buy new ones and nobody cares what the person who take care of them have to say about anything, anyway. Use a goddamned Kindle, faggot, if you want to read like some pansy.

>>6600603
we think its awful we just don't think Obama should show up to her house with a luger and demand she help that kid. also she seems creepy. like a hobbit and a shark had a kid and it grew up to be her

>>6600218
>If a sick, dying little boy want to meet you, you fucking drop everything and go see him.

this is one of the dumbest things I've ever read.

>HURR ITS CALLED BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING

how about you fuck off and find someone else who has time to waste flying down to whatever suburban wasteland you live in so they can give you your "dying wish."

the idea that someone is obligated to do anything simply because a child asks them to is laughable.

>>6600614
>we think its awful we just don't think Obama should show up to her house with a luger and demand she help that kid
That isn't close to happening. She's a celebrity and as such all people are doing is criticizing her behavior. You're allowed to do that. And she's allowed to not give a fuck about that either.

>>6600619
>the idea that someone is obligated to do anything simply because a child asks them to is laughable.
You are morally and socially obligated to try and fulfill the last wish of a kid dying from cancer. If you don't there will be social consequences and if you have a conscience moral consequences too.

There isn't any legal obligation nor consequences.

>>6600627
>You are morally and socially obligated to try and fulfill the last wish of a kid dying from cancer.

top kek.

so I guess I should just say fuck you to all of my actual obligations, my family, my friends and clear my schedule just to meet some little turd who may not even be alive when I get there.

>>6600633
>when I get there
lolsee >>6600228

If she has time to cook XYZ for her faggot friends, she has time to let a little kid in her house for a few hours while they film.
He's dying. It's not like he's gonna be running around or anything.

>>6600635
having cancer and happening to be a child doesn't give you special privileges. At least it shouldn't, but people get so fucking worked up about their little sob stories that it's become status quo to go out of your way and break your back over every little ankle biter who asks you to and if you refuse a bunch of fat suburbanite women post mean things about you on the internet and try to drag your name through the mud.

>>6600627
not defending her just baffled by your comment that libertarians don't think what she did was bad. i'm not mad if i sound mad i'm just saying that's the difference between liberal and libertarian. the luger was hyperbole. obviously obama would be using a katana or a wakizashi to enforce the Child Cancer Act of 2011.

He may have been a pedo, but he's still one of the best cooking show hosts there ever was.

>>6600633
>so I guess I should just say fuck you to all of my actual obligations
This is an actual obligation too. If you do prioritize it lower than your other obligations then people who don't (the vast majority) have a right to criticize you for that. That's all that can happen. You should be able to handle that criticism.

>to meet some little turd who may not even be alive when I get there.
Careful with those edges anon.

>>6600642
>not defending her just baffled by your comment that libertarians don't think what she did was bad.
I'm saying edgemeisters on 4chan tend to flock to libertarianism as a vehicle for their self-abolished conscience.

> saying that's the difference between liberal and libertarian
Not even the shrillest liberal would say that she's legally bound to go or that the state should in any way get involved. All anyone is doing is criticizing her behavior. Which is perfectly acceptable.

>>6600648
>this is an actual obligation

no, no it's fucking not. I don't know when society decided this was so, but it's fucking stupid.

I suppose if I ever get cancer I can just call up Morgan Freeman and have him fly to my house just because society says I'm entitled to it.

>>6600651
morgan freeman would probably hang out with you for a little he seems like a nice dude
its not like an ACTUAL obligation, its just a nice thing to do
its not like people were asking ina garden to leave her grandfathers deadbed or miss work or skip meals, they just wanted 30 minutes of her free time to make some kid happy. and if you really cant see a situation where you would be willing to do that then youre a fuck

>>6600651
>I don't know when society decided this was so
About the time the very concept of society was established.

>I suppose if I ever get cancer I can just call up Morgan Freeman and have him fly to my house just because society says I'm entitled to it.
You're not a kid. And god forbid you ever have a child and it gets cancer then maybe a meeting could be arranged and most celebrities would oblige.

>>6600651
I bet you're the same guy who says you shouldn't be obligated to mow your lawn even if it decreases neighborhood property values.

>>6600657
Not him but forcing people in California to have well maintained lawns given the drought is pretty shitty too.

SHUT THE FUCK UP
GO BACK TO /POL/ IF YOU WANNA DISCUSS THIS BULLSHIT
HOLY CRAP

>not posting based Graham Kerr
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=czrj4yJm6z0

>>6600332
i did not expect him to sound like that

>>6600228
>>6600218
>durr because you're a dying child you can get anything you want

>>6600681
Don't be jealous just because autism isn't terminal so you don't get what you want, Anon.

>>6600682
you sure told me

The libertardians are just as bad as the feminazis, and we would be better off without either. Can't people just be normal anymore?

>>6599773
Cause he is French

>>6599740
i used to come home from school to watch this guy as well as james barber (the urban peasant), god bless his soul

>>6600377
>those bleary, red eyes

Nice touch, anon

>>6600657
you're literally comparing apples to oranges here, friend. You've got no argument.

>>6600656
nothing you've said has even slightly convinced me or anyone that people have an inherent obligation to drop everything for a kid with cancer. It's a stupid trope that panders to bleeding heart types who believe children are sacred or some shit when in fact they have very little value until they get older.

Hello /ck/ and welcome to my show!

First let's make a tablescape! Yes, that's actually a thing!

Okay! Now I'm gonna show you how to make a delicious meal for all your guests. Take some canned shit and put it on a plate, doesn't that look fantastic! Next I'm gonna make nice summer drink, take 6 bottles of tequila, 12 gallons of vodka, and stir that together! Your friends and family will love it!

>>6599552
God, she fucking pisses me off.
Never had I wanted to kick a singular woman in the mouth so much until i saw her show.
Fucking hell I don't even know WHY i fucking hate her just everything about watching her pisses me off.

>>6600377
JUST

How about Justin Wilson? It was like watching your grandpa cook.

>>6600679
I was expecting more of a British Cedric the Entertainer sound myself.

>>6601217
Ah gahruhntee eit!
>Whole cloves of garlic shoved into anything he can.
Loved watching that guy.

>>6601201
Only the best for the great Mayor of New York City

>>6601203
Something about her voice comes off as subtly bitchy. It's like he's trying to sound calm and soothing, but she's actually talking down to you, like Cersei from GOT

>>6600211

> channel surfing at night
> traverse through PBS territory
> come across a cooking show
> set is a normal house at night (noticeable because background is a front door and dark living room)
> old guy comes
> dressed like a woman (earrings, skirt like pants, maybe makeup)

Late night tv, not even once

>television chef presents delicious recipes that are appropriately targeted at competent amateurs who have room to improve but are not big dumb bunglers in the kitchen
>I CAN'T STAND THAT BITCH WTF SHE IS THE WORST

Ina Garten is aces, fuck all y'all

>>6601464
>defending the barefat cuntessa

Kill yourself

>no Yan Can Cook
plebs

>>6601667
see
>>6599740

>>6602103
That's Stephen Yan. >>6601667 is talking about unrelated Martin Yan. Stephen Yan wasn't the host of Yan Can Cook. Martin Yan was. Stephen Yan hosted Wok With Yan.

>>6602129
yans all look alike to me

>>6602134
Thankfully, they don't cook alike. Martin Yan's better.

>>6601217

That guy was the best cooking show host, period. He'd get sloppy on the wine while he was cooking and rambling.

I want to punch everyone on the Food Network and Cooking Channel. It's either hipster faggots or overblown retards or big mouth big tit bitches who can barely cook.

It's disgusting, and I hate it.

Next Food Network Star is almost here. Who cares? You'll get a show for maybe a few weeks, that won't get any views, and then you're forced to be a judge on Guy Fieri's clone of Supermarket Sweep. Congratulations.

>>6599552

>>6603020

>>6603024

>>6603027

>>6603033

>>6603038

>>6603039

>>6603009
>Guy Fieri
RIP
May you reside in FlavorTown eternally

>>6601201
Oh god, Sandra Lee. She obviously only gave a shit about the cocktails. There was one episode where she was making food for her son's eighth birthday party, and of course she had to make a cocktail for herself to drink during the party. Because god forbid you should ever be sober around your children.

>>6599740

>Only Canadians

i'm a britfag and i was obsessed with him as a child. didn't give a shit about cooking either, that came a lot later.

>>6603113
Forbid indeed. A handful of my WASPy friends have told they've never seen their mothers sober.

MAKE WAY FOR YOUR DRUNKEN KING

>>6603143
Floyd was my fucking nigger, was sad to hear he passed away. Really enjoying Rick Steins shows lately.

>>6603168
Floyd was a legend. He was the one who pioneered the travelogue cooking shows. His producer also produces Rick Steins stuff which is why it's so similar.

>>6600135
>>6600164
>>6600177
>>6600332

Barring all the "angry chef grrr" shit hes done, hes a incredibly competent cook and his normal cooking shows are incredibly good.

Plus he sounds like he actually wants to fuck the food hes making in his youtube channel.

>>6603294
Thats awesome. My last post got deleted.... Got any favourite floyd vids on youtube?

>>6599552
Watching her is a better sleep aid than Paxil.

>>6600099
>I was asked if you can use dried tears of African children but you should always use fresh, they're so easy to get

>>6601216
UNDERCOOK

>>6604073

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ypoH2Z3khZ0

>>6605546
MY

>>6605427
>paroxetine
>sleep aid

>>6606430
I feel you.

>>6606430
I have a friend who was prescribed it for ongoing sleep issues. It's entirely possible his doctors are idiots.

>>6601187
>they have very little value
>thinking of people only in terms of value

wow

No Bobby Flay ITT?
Insanity.

She isn't barefoot in the show, her name isn't even contessa.

>>6601291
>Only the best for the great Mayor of New York City

governor of ny