/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>red board
>/ck/

The 'best of ck' consists entirely of calling everything a meme. Memefood. Memechef. Meme everything. If you don't find that funny, you're in the wrong place.

When was /ck/ a red board?

>>6458792
Two days ago.

>>6458792
>>6458788
>not knowing you can change styles
>2015

>>6458775
>inb4 super unfunny sundae ramen abomination

>>6458797
Except, pictured:
>No.612269355

There's over 600mil posts from the board where the screencap comes from. /ck/ has 6.4mil.

Please fuck off with your shitty maymay posts.

>>6458861

>>6458867

>>6458869

>>6458869
>a fly just landed on it. throw it out, i'm not hungry anymore.

I've been halfway through "designing" a sub at Subway and looked at it and just thought "ugh, this is horrible. I don't even want this." I got it anyway.

>>6458876
>>6458869
>>6458867
>>6458861
>>6458856
>>6458851

Only the dankest seakay meme

>>6458876
Oh man I haven't lold that much in a while

when we found the food wishes guys Fetlife profile

>>6459057
but thats not chef john.

look at the nose

>>6459064
>He doesn't have a home rhinoplasty kit

>>6459064

its just some make up. thats obviously chef john.

i cant help but think his upcoming recipe for cheese blintzes is a metaphor for a rawdogged vagina laden with semen

Just found this in puush gallery, /ck/ at its worst

>>6459134
same guy here, also found this which was a good moment this time

I have a couple

>>6458832
Sorry m8

I was in that thread, it's precious to me.

>>6459259

>>6459266
That actually looks pretty good to me.
If my wife could cook half as well as that she'd get Mr. Happy-Stick more than once a week.

>>6459309
>Looks pretty good
I hope you're just shitposting. It's from: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jDGqtjcyxlQ

The humor of /ck/ speaks to me.

I haven't posted here in around a year.

Does irish stew guy still come here?

>>6459351
who?

>>6459353
He used to come and post autistic stories about his co-workers all the time.

I have one other screencap somewhere.

>>6459353
>being this new

>>6459353
This guy.

>>6459250
This kinda reads like my aunt's Christmas Funny emails.

>>6459357
how did i miss this one

>>6458851
MY SIDES

>>6459266
My God, that chopping job. They really did follow the recipe.

>>6458968
>OP's pics aren't enlarged
>text is too tiny to read

I can't even tell what's going on besides that the OP started with steak and there's a ton of reaction images.

>>6459246
i will never touch evan williams whiskey for the rest of my life

i drank a handle last tuesday and by the end of the night i was on all fours on my girlfriends bathroom throwing up into her toilet and shitting into her bathtub

Just because I know some of you don't have this

>>6459259
this was a masterpiece
I can never get over to the fact that it got a hole in the ceiling

>>6459351
>>6459353
>>6459384
oh wow

>>6459416
>shirt says The Smiths
>it's got Elvis on it
>edgy bart and lisa skeleton tats

I'll bet she's some stupid desperate fucks dream girl, he lies awake at night so upset that she's so quirky and wonderful and would "get him" on exactly the right level.

>>6459409
Get on my level.

>>6459411
>My ancestors are smiling at me, Imperial. Can you say the same?

>>6459238
Good stuff

>>6459406
I got to the point where OP started adding Frosted Flakes and then I stopped.

>>6459411
I realised I have six pictures of this fucking sad crab

>>6459426
Mate the only reason anyone puts up with that shit is because the crazy, lel so randum, riot grrls fuck like animals.

Never want to marry them, not date them, just have some fun

As my dad put it, never put your dick in crazy because you'll never want to fuck sane again

>>6459737
/r/ those pictures

>>6459351
>>6459357
>>6459384
Brilliant.

>>6458775
>ITT things newfags think are seekay because food related
Newfags gonna new. Dumping what I have which isn't a lot

>>6459263
I know what I'm doing this weekend.

>>6459480
>Blended & Packaged in Sierra Leone
Holy Hell

>>6458851
I just started working at subway and afraid someone might do this shit now.

Personal favorite

>>6459266
>the Taste

>>/ck/thread/S6072432 This was fun.

>>6459141
oh god, I can't believe this is true

fucking mama amadori, my beloved grandmother, always goes on about the carbonara being just right and matching the family recipe. her fucking family immigrated to U.S. before this shit was even invented. fuck her. i can't wait for that bitch to die

>>6460072
Ah, piss off.

/ck/ has maybe a dozen interesting screencaps. Food-related stuff totally has a place on /ck/ humor threads, even if it was from another board.

>>6460464
well that got messed up

>>6460463
>missing bitching about customers general

>>6460072
>you're a big pizza
>not you're a big pie
poor show.

>>6459266
This is perfection.

>>6460482
I think the very next post in that thread was them saying they should have called him a large pie

>>6459714
My sides fucking exploded

>>6459709
You could probably sell that as "artisan sushi"

>>6459057
Wait what, can someone explain why /ck/ hates chef John so much?
Does he really have a fetlife?

>>6460601
Those are really cute pantyhose
I should get a pair

>>6460603
Want me to fuck you in them?

>>6460604
yes

>>6460607
Post your steam

>>6460604
Well I don't know anon can you
Are you even cute

>>6460611
I'm fairly cute, are you?

>>6460609
http://steamcommunity.com/profiles/76561198035941885

>>6460613
If I'm wearing cat pantyhose I guarantee it

>>6460609
Huh, for once I can't see Suzy's face with ungodly amounts of makeup on it.
She actually looks pretty nice.

>>6460615
Post some type of contact info. If you're wearing any type of pantyhose I'll do anything and everything to you

>>6460603
I've tried looking for them but can't find them in any of the local stores.

>>6460601
/ck/ loves Chef John. Despite his flyover like renditions of "ethnic" foods his recipes are really clear, easy to follow and end up tasty.

>>6460622
In California?

>>6460637
Miraculously yes I am, where?
Also, are you a guy or a girl?

>>6460639
San Diego area
I'm a grill

>>6460650
I live in Fresno, do you have a skype or steam or kik or something?
I feel weird turning into /soc/ on /ck/

>>6460470
I preferred the first one.

>>6460654
Post some sort of contact info and I'll get to you as I don't want a bunch of random people adding me
I've got skype and steam

>>6460662
My current Skype name is Chen.I.A
Add me when you can

>>6460673
Sorry forgot cute girl pic

>>6459480
Ive seen this image for years and every time I think about whether or not I would drink that

>>6460654
I'd still bone her, but she went from 10/10 to 7/10 in this picture.

>>6460698
Wow she looks amazing in the first and only good in the second.
WHY GOD

>>6460702
Smile and lighting, the basics of good photos.

>>6460654
>>6460698
15/10 wood berry

>>6460698
Maybe it's because no smile

>>6460698
Have another.

>>6460711
Smile lighting and contrast

>>6459309
>Seeing your penis as some kind of reward

>>6459416

>wearing the watch backwards
>elvis instead of morissey
>those tats

is this really real?

>>6460624
Just jump on eBay and search for cat leggings or something. They're all chinese.

>>6460470
would you believe me if i said i was buford the monkey in that screencap?

because its true.

pretty ebin huh

>>6460662
>Tfw cute girl never ended up adding me

>>6460990
She probably wasn't a girl m8

Didn't know you could pick up cute grills in pantyhose on /ck/. I live in San Diego and am fairly attractive

>>6460955
I believe you

>>6461018
Skype?

>>6461018
only in summer though, they're usually in storage during the colder months

>>6461059
can you go to a fancy place and takes more pictures again? and post pics of the rocks they fed you please

>>6461058
Don.Conch
>>6461059
you'd think it'd be the other way around, right?

>>6459411
fuck, i forgot about sad crab. did this originate here?

>>6459716
jesus christ

>>6460654
>I feel weird
This is what it feels like to be a whore, hon

>>6460336
>Excelsior!

>>6459714
>"bon appetit. Wanna fuck?"
Alpha as fuck. Wish I was half the man this dude was.

>>6459737
Only six? I used to have the whole thread but somehow forgot to back that folder up.

>>6459263

One of my favorites.

1/2

>>6461404
2/2
they are unrelated, dunno why I numbered a dump of 2 pictures

>>6460467

>>6461349
Anyone got original Fazoli's thread?

>>6459716
I don't understand this, I make these all the time and they come out fine. A little crumbly, but they look and taste like cookies.

>>6461512
well meme'd

>>6461457
>Fazoli's thread
This? >>/ck/thread/3958629

>>6460404
I wouldn't take anything as facts but Italians behavior towards carbonara may reveal that deep down inside they don't want to accept the fact that they haven't invented it.

>>6459351
goddamn what every happened to irish stew guy?

>>6461630
Coworker put him in the hospital claiming it was an accident

>>6461597
Is there a list of previous "best of" threads on that site? I'd like to look through others to see what hasn't been posted here.

>>6461597
>>6461457
nah, he means the one that happened a day or two ago. some dude came on ranting about how /ck/ were a bunch of cunts and it turned into a doubles get thread, which were claimed in the name of fazoli's
>holy fazoli's!
it was a funny thread.

>>6461636
damn is there a screen cap of that?

>>6461653
...

>>6461431
isnt this the guy that said he knows karate and wants to beat people up online?

>>6461650
fag

>>6460650
I'm not him but I'm also a faggot in the san diego area

>>6459480
jesus christ it looks like a fireworks label

>>6458851
As a subway employee this made me laugh. I think I might be able to handle most of it if there wasn't a massive rush, but the best way to piss us off is to ask for bacon after the sandwich is toasted or for avocado after the veggies are on.

>>6461650
>>/ck/thread/5949666

Can people not google this shit?

>nobody brings up the Green Lantern's hamboigahs
Oh I am so, so disappointed in all of you.

>>6459057

Chef "Jizz Jester" John is an artist so it makes sense if he has some unique sexual tastes.

His food speaks for itself. Who cares if he's submissive or dominant?

I liked this one. Wish i knew who said it. I always imagine they were italian.

>>6461066
you know what, I have two bank holidays in May which makes 2 long weekends

tell me what fancy place you'd like to see me at and I'll go there and post it live (if i can get a reservation for 1)

>>6458968
I was there for this!

I'm famouse gais lookit meeeeeeeeee

>>6460336
Brilliant.

>>6459426
Motherfucking nailed it.

>>6459741
You're objectivly wrong. Yes, legit crazy girls fuck wild but with most of these girls it's all an act, they have errected the quirky and crazy facade but in reality they're just as boring and normal as everyone else.

I made wa la! am I still relevant?

>>6462237
Aren't you like 15? It's past your bedtime bub.

bundubs

>>6462131
I"m trying to think where was the one you went to was it the fat duck or the waterside inn maybe? If it was one of those two you should go to the other since I'm assuming they're closeish to you.

pls post pic of rocks now

>>6462276
i went to L'Enclume

the fat duck moved to melbourne lel

>>6460733
Mr Happy-Stick is the name we gave our dildo you nonce.

>>6462293
how about fraiche? pls dont make me pick where you go

>>6460624
They sell them at hot topic

>>6462301
>tfw the reservation page has a dropdown list for number of people and the minimum number is 2

soooooooooooooo anyone in L O N D O N?

>>6462524
>tfw I'd fly to bongland for a date with borneo

>>6459016
You really really liked that danke mayme

Requesting that /ck/ drawing of a man bitterly eating his food prepared at home while staring at a family walking out of a fast food restaurant

>>6462526
lucky for you its not a date

>>6462558
if you and I went together it would be a date

>>6462592
>>6462558
Get a room

>>6461597
No, the original one, where it just hit a point where someone said "shit thread?" and everything got mega derailed to the point that the mods had to delete it.

>>6458775
A fairly recent one, OP.

>>6462524
borneo i have no idea who you are, but if you're looking for a dining partner in the north then I'm as good as any.

>>6462712
looks like the thread youre asking for is gonna start again over here>>6462637

>>6462524
>>6462795
Borneo, I know who you are and who they are. Do not listen to them. They are not as good a dining partner as anyone else. It is a trick.

>>6459351
>>6459357
>>6459384
God I didn't know Assburgers can be such a serious problem. I felt like laughing and crying at the same time. It's so hilariously sad.

>>6462875
You know that fat guy from Office Space? I imagine it's a lot like that.

>>6462524

londoner here

les make history gurl

the deer roadkill

>>6459426
>>6460849
I own this shirt. Does that piss you off?

>>6462990
Lol, even Bob Marley looks the same as every other black musician from that day. No wonder reggae has zero variation and everything sounds the same.

>>6462795
im a harmless weirdo who takes pictures of their food and posts it to 4chan

which part are you from? im kind of interested in Holbeck Ghyll's Gourmet menu if you're serious about it

>>6463124
I'm living in york right now, so we don't seem very close, but somewhere like The Yorke Arms might be in the middle for both of us? Of course if there are any other places you'd like to visit that might suit both of us do tell.

>>6463592
google maps tells me it's a 12 hour journey there by public transport since the travel routes loop around the north and i don't have a car

how bout The French in manchester?

>>6463791
>12 hour journey
dear god, we will shelve that idea.
The French's 6 and 8 course menus look very good, but i was perhaps thinking more of a lunch meet and their 3 course menu doesn't really thrill me.. Are you in manchester?

>>6458968
>It was just an innocent medium steak!
>it was medium well.
Funniest part of the whole image.

>>6463826
>3 course

fuck you I want a million borneo courses pictures

>>6461621
I wouldn't take anything an Italian says as fact.

>>6459266
I'd punch her for the whole video so many times... but how she cut the garlic makes me rage the most

>>6459324
not on ck for more then a few months

never seen this

>literally mfw I saw her coocking

>>6459714
Annie Hall in real life.

Also they're not screaming, it's the steam coming out of their shells. Also, they're screaming.

>>6461431
>2:30am Just screaming

>>6462548
>read initial post saying store eggnog isn't good
>immediately think to myself "Nah, Hood eggnog is fucking fantastic, this cunt doesn't know what he's talking about"
>read the response
This fucking guy. I love this fucking guy.

>>6463020
No one is this retarded, right?

>>6462762

This is golden, and it's really refreshing to see something with a recent timestamp

>>6463826
nah im in Ulverston. Fair enough, i dont really want to stay overnight in some random place

tfw can't find any elaborate tasting menus available at lunchtime, save for L'Enclume
why don't they want my money

>>6464042
Have you read comments on Youtube?

>>6464027
he's a rework of a /sp/ copypasta but it required a ton of changes so its nearly its own pasta. solid effort from him

>>6464118
hmmm that is a long way away, it must be a nightmare not having a car. Have you looked at Manchester House's lunch menu? Looks pretty good to me
http://www.manchesterhouse.uk.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/Lunch-Menu-07.04.15-pdf.pdf

>>6464165
yeah, i live a bit out of town too so its a 45 minute walk to the nearest bus stop too

that looks amazing, I really want to try snail too!
do you have steam or email?

>>6464198
yeah everything on the menu sounds excellent. Do get in touch, it would be lovely to actually do this

>>6464265
randomreply@live.com

>>6460302
Why do people make this shit up? It's neither convincing nor funny.

>>6464198
>>6464265
Can you guys fuck off and move to /soc/ or something?

>>6458968
i was there
what a night that was

>>6461431
Fuck that was pretty funny.

>>6459711
kek

>>6459714
my sides
Captcha was me having to pick between steaks and bacon

>>6463020
Are you daft?

>>6462990
That's hilarious.

>>6462911
i wish i had the whole thing

>>6465114
he has quite an imagination

>>6465105
>>6465108
>>6465114
>>6465136
>>6465107
these goddamn pictures get me so bad every time

>>6465105
>>6465107
>>6465108
>>6465114
>>6465117
>>6465136
>>6465147
ohhhhhhh fuck
I am entirely and absolutely slain

>>6465094
>I'm not gay or anything

>>6465105 et al

whats so funny about these? what are the jokes referencing to?

non english user here

>>6465229
just standard shitty overused jokes

I dont get them either

>>6459324
oh my god

>>6465229
It's gay
>lel so randumb XDDDDDDD
shit that retards think is so funny.

>>6465229

the poor English is amusing

>>6459411
As someone who doesn't actually consume shellfish for religious reasons, I'm curious if there really is a difference between killing the crab prior to cooking or not. Like I also know from cooking shows that you do something similar to a lobster before boiling it, but I don't understand why it would matter either way. Does it change the flavor if it's killed before cooking versus cooking it live or is it just something to make PETA happy?

>>6468731

Seafood basically spoils so fast the only way to ensure its fresh is to purchase it live.

You kill it at home so the warm crab/lobster doesn't start walking around your kitchen while you're getting ready and kill your cat

>>6468731
>>6468778
I'm pretty sure he was talking about killing the lobster/crab RIGHT before dropping it in boiling water vs just dropping it in the water alive. not purchasing already dead seafood at the store. Also, do you buy your seafood without the things around their claws? If so, why on Earth would you do that?

>>6468731
Pretty sure it's a thing just to appease people. I never kill them before hand. They basically die as soon as they hit the boiling water.

>>6458968

>mfw I see my posts in best of screen cap

I went mad for a while (actual wandering around in a haze rambling gibberish nonsense sense and only half aware of what or where I was), and for a period of around a few months or so it seemed a good deal of people could immediately pick me out on /a/ solely by my language choices or way of speaking. No matter what I did, it seemed to persist. They gave me a name as well.

Still see screencaps of threads I was in posted from time to time. Funny feeling.

>>6468811
Rambling grandpa, is that you?

>>6468816
It is not.

>>6468811
Are you this guy?

>>6468845
No, least I don't think so. Though it would have been ~2012-2013.

>>6462762
Jesus Christ, I haven't laughed this hard in a week.

>>6462548
Wow that guy is mad.
It's just extra strength calories, get over yourself.

I enjoy these types of images.

>>6460467
I still have no idea what activated almonds are.

>>6471391
After looking it up, you soak your almonds.

>>6461938
it's from a danish comedy cooking show

>>6471391
Almonds with a touch of bullshit

>>6459737
You just got memed my friend. Memed hard

>>6465094
I remember this being posted and losing my shit!!

>>6465094
>something i wrote was screencapped
what a nice feeling

>>6459480
>premium quality

>>6471955
why did you think a free sample meant he was coming onto you

>>6472062
>How thick would you like it
>Is that a good thickness
Basically Freud is having a field day right now.

>>6458775

>>6458851
Oh my fucking god this made my night.

>>6459406
Open it in a new tab and zoom in.

>>6459259
Holy shit this is incredible.

Bump