/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>6435594
>>6435594
>africans
>food

topkek anon

>indian roommate
>never cooks
>only orders pizza
>i've never seen him eat anything else

>>6435594
Boiled eggs stay good for a week anyways and if he's keeping the water hot then probably longer. You sound like a judgemental ass.

>>6435594

>Be me
>Live alone in my own apartment that parents bought me

Feels good not to be poor

>>6435618
but but anon, you're not rich, your parents are!

>>6435612
overboiled eggs sitting in room temperature water for a week. he somehow hasn't gotten sick yet. also tripfag please gtfo

>>6435626
1. No I will not go away. Just because I manned up a long time ago and chose to use make name to accompany my posts dooesnt mean I have to face the bullshit nameless fools like you give me whenever I speak my mind freely on an open forum.

2. If they're at room temperature then they wouldn't be overboiled they would be kept at a consistent warmth which is even better for their flavor and potency as protein rich meals.

Dipshit. See what being a cunt to me gets you? Corrected tenfold. Think before yoi click post.

>>6435636
>>6435636

I've often considered getting a roommate, but.. eh. I like being able to sit around with my dick hanging out, and talking to myself and making wierd noises without anyone to judge me.

>>6435636
God damn you're a retard.

When I was in the military I was surrounded by plebs who loved LE EPIC MEALTIME LOL BACON and made those shitty meals constantly.

>>6435594
>wa la!

top cake

>>6435612
>quit being a judgemental ass
what do you think the nature of this type of thread is. some are honest gripes but most are judgements.

We dont like yer kind round her trip.
you gotta live up to the trips of the past:Sceak, progun, etc
prove yourself

>>6435636
>manned up
this is what tripfags actually believe

>>6435636
>pretending to be retarded

>>6435612
The thing that triggered me the most is the implication of him leaving his shit around taking up counter space.

>>6435594
it's voila you mouthbreathing cretin

>>6435955
>being this new

my white trash roommate eats kraft singles rolled up in little tubes with mustard. also uncooked ramen.

>>6435955
>Trying to correct a spelling that's already right
>Wa la! Shitpost!

>>6437915
>kraft singles rolled up in little tubes with mustard

So they roll up kraft singles and then dip it in mustard, or is the mustard added to the kraft first and then rolled up? Either way that is nasty.

>>6437939
neither, he rolls them up then injects the center with mustard until it flows out the other end.

>>6435612
>>6435636
i wish i could smear shit all over your keyboard

>>6435636
this nigga is definitenly 14

>>6437955

>roommate takes sausage
>wraps it in a layer of ground beef
>wraps that in bacon
>wraps that in ground beef
>wraps that in bacon
>cooks in toaster oven for 20 minutes
>covers in mustard

So gross

>same roommate takes huge, thick steak
>heats up cast iron pan
>cooks on each side for 10 seconds
>eats

Just fucking eat raw steak
>

>>6437955

>>6438051
Sounds fucking amazing, you just sound like a twat.

> one female roommate lives there with 3yo boy
> constantly dumps child on other people to go to "work"
> feeds child by dumping cheerios in a pan like dog kibble
> leaves it out for days until kid eats it all
> gets mad if you toss it out
> gets mad if you feed the kid real food because he's allergic to everything except cheerios apparently
> can't call child welfare without screwing over other girl that lives here, who actually takes care of her baby and is an excellent mom
>mfw

>>6438066
why would she get screwed over too

>>6438074
Because DCF is fucked.

If one child in a household is unsafe or neglected, that means ALL children are unsafe under that roof. Period. That chick could move out and take her cheerios with her and the better mother may STILL have trouble getting DCF off her case if someone called.

How my roommate prepares eggs:
>cracks two eggs into a bowl
>adds dash of almond milk
>mixes briefly
>pours into skillet
>turns on stove
>wait for eggs to cook
>scrape stuck eggs out of the skillet onto a plate
>wa la

>>6438074
Exactly this
>>6438113
Otherwise I would in a second. Shit's ridiculous.

>>6438115
Why the fuck is he using almond milk as (assumingly) a substitute for cream

>>6438066

maximumrustles.jpg

I have a 2.5 year old and this makes me batshit. I work my ass off to cook that little maggot fresh food every day and give her veggies and fruits and whole grains at every meal and some people think it's ok to treat a small child otherwise like you said. She should be killed before the snot factory gets any older so the memories won't be too bad and it can live a normal human child life. being ppor is no excuse for treating your crotchfruit like a fucking livestock

I seriously hope you make up for that human garbage by feeding her kid proper food and raising it right as best you can

>>6438113

this is correct

>and sad

Relevant.

>>6435626
>eggs are laid warm
>shell protects bacteria from getting in
>shiggy diggy

>>6438179
The only time the kid gets a bath is when the other girl is bathing her baby and she throws the other kid in too out of pity. (She ends up watching him a lot because she's too nice to say no. She has two jobs).

He is not even close to potty trained despite being almost 4. I changed him once because his pull up was super full (never changed a diaper in my life) kid has diaper rash and maybe even phimosis.

I took him to burger king once and he ate two burgers and like 4 packs of those Apple slices.

>>6437915
I do that with slices of turkey

>>6437955
I can't stop laughing

>>6438251


that bitch needs to die and that child needs a parent that cares.

take care of him when you can, anon, he needs you. he needs someone. kids need care or they are in pain

>>6435646
I'll be your roommate.
I used to do that with my last roommate.
Sit around naked, playing games and watching anime.
He wasn't even from 4chan. I got him into anime.
He'd cook some odd things sometimes.
But overall he was okay.

>>6438291
Well apparently she traded her last child for a truck, so I'm thinking maybe if we bought he a new set off tires, she would beat it. Then, the rest of us could raise the kid in a 'it takes a village' sort of way. First thing I'd do is fatten him up by feeding him eggs and sausage every day for breakfast. :/

>>6438292
did you guys fuck?

>>6438217
Who are you quoting?

>>6435602
Praise the lord tonight.

Indian food smells like shit. It tastes amazing though.

>roommate literally only cooks frozen pizzas, or orders pizzas.
>one day he asks how to cook eggs so i show him how to cook an omelette.
>the next day i show him how to boil water and put boxed pasta in. he adds his store bought jar sauce to it.
>now my roommate acts like he is a chef whenever we talk to people about food.

>>6438305
Strange you could tell. We fucked ~3 times, one I took up the a but it wasn't for me. The other two times doing him were ok but he always had a slightly shitty/wet butt so we stopped.

We sucked each other off a few times too.

Otherwise not really.

>>6438128
That is stupid. The idea that child services takes all the kids and makes it impossible to get back is a myth. Social workers are overloaded with cases and aim to get kids back home in the first two weeks if possible. If it is clear that they are two separate moms who happen to rent at the same place and one takes proper care and one doesn't they are not going to take both kids.

>>6435636
fuckoff.

>>6438115
>almond milk
so he's just watering down his eggs then

>>6438066
And this is why abortion should be legal. So that stupid irresponsible women like her won't have kids that they treat like shit.

>>6438368
>>>/pol/

It's been a long time, but my old college roommate (still basically my best friend), used to reheat everything in the oven in an old aluminum pan that he had. He never washed it. Ever. Four years of college. And it was shit like Wendy's or McDonald's all the time.

He insisted that he was "seasoning" the pan. Which I told him was really only a thing for cast iron. He didn't believe me.

Anyways, he did a ton of terrible shit, like cleaning the floors with the same sponge he'd use for the plates. I have plenty of stories about him, if anyone's interested.

>>6438395
Let's hear one of the worst ones

>made some cookies to bring to my game group
>haha time to go to the gym!
>Come back an hour later my roommates are having a house party they didn't tell me about
>Half the cookies are gone, a quarter are on the floor, and the other quarter are soaked in bud light
>So fucking mad I take their keg and throw it off the balcony
>Leave and spend the next two days at my girlfriends place
Fuck roommates

>>6438304
W-what do you mean traded her last child for a truck?

>>6437955
what the fuck man

>>6438461
She did. She had three kids.
>3rd she still has but it's probably a matter of time.
>2nd she traded for a truck
>1st is being raised by paternal grandparents who sued to get custody

Sadly she will probably just pop out another kid after this one is gone.

>>6438304
Just eat the kid.

>>6438379
Fuck off christfag

>>6438445
>game group
>being a baking bitch for your beta nerds
>getting so autistically worked up that you throw a keg off the balcony

You sound like a tard.

>>6438484
Jesus. Some people are fucking disgusting. I just hope the kid ends up alright/with someone who gives half a shit.

>>6438339
>The other two times doing him were ok but he always had a slightly shitty/wet butt so we stopped

i just shot beer out of my nose you faggot

>>6438445
>throwing a keg off a balcony and spending two days in a different house just because your cookies were eaten

What are you, some type of Quasimodo aspie?

>>6435636
Hi there!

You seem to have made a bit of a mistake in your post. Luckily, the users of 4chan are always willing to help you clear this problem right up! You appear to have used a tripcode when posting, but your identity has nothing at all to do with the conversation! Whoops! You should always remember to stop using your tripcode when the thread it was used for is gone, unless another one is started! Posting with a tripcode when it isn't necessary is poor form. You should always try to post anonymously, unless your identity is absolutely vital to the post that you're making!

Now, there's no need to thank me - I'm just doing my bit to help you get used to the anonymous image-board culture!

>>6438498
My roommates were tards who threw parties every other night to try to get into the pants of Freshman girls. Which made it really hard to get enough sleep to show up for work each morning since I didn't want to be "that guy" and when I did ask they would be quiet for ten minutes before going crazy shouting again.
Also they never washed their dishes.
Really it was just a lot of pent up anger.
Also the keg was probably only half full.

>>6438484
sooooo... how did she trade a kid for a truck?

>>6438484
h-how do you trade a kid for a truck
why did someone would give away a truck for a kid
how old the kid was

>>6438445
>my roommates are having a house party they didn't tell me about
if i were to have a party I wouldn't tell you about it either

>>6438484
That kid is probably some rednecks sex slave now. Or did its dad realize what a terrible fucking parent she was and gave her the truck to get her to fuck off?

>>6435594
Africans can not cook. The reason? THEY DON'T HAVE FOOD.

A few years ago I was neighbors with some African transplants. They were really nice guys. I ate breakfast with them one morning soon after they moved in. They crushed a bag of potato chips, poured water inside and ate it with their hands. Everything that they prepared was like that.

>>6438550
>>6438571
> person decides they want kid (3yo at the time)
> She says ok gib me dat dank truck der
> they trade
> no fucks given
> no cops called either
Sure it's illegal but whose keeping track?

>>6438608

>>6438484
How the fuck did you get such trailer trash as a roommate? Why don't you have her evicted and then call child services? Why hasn't she been put in jail yet?

(assuming any of this is real)

>>6438612
holy shit
I was really hoping it would be the father wanting easy way custody or whatever

also what >>6438650 said

>>6438179
I'd like to commend your use of "crotchfruit" and "snot factory".

>>6435594
That's actually fine though... food keeps alot longer than modern americans give it credit for.

You know in medieval europe they had this thing called a "coffin" which was like a very thick loaf of bread that they hollowed out and put every kind of cooked meat you could imagine in and they would eat out of it for a week, only putting the bread "lid" on between meals.

>>6438672
people in medieval europe did lots of things.

>>6438113
>Because DCF is fucked.

sounds reasonable to me. Maybe if the other Mom was such an upstanding citizen like you say she would have reported the Bad Mom in the first place - they'd probably be lenient then, but no - if anyone reports her now then they both deserve to lose their kids. How can you sit back and do nothing while someones neglecting their kid?

Anyway that's a bizarre circumstance all around. Who has a kid and lives in a circumstance where you'd have roommates? That's reason enough for DCF to take them if you ask me.

Half tempted to send this post to the proper authorities and see if they could backtrace it.

>>6435636
Stop whining like a little bitch. How did you lose your shit so hard to a statement as common as "tripfag plz go"?

>>6438677
Yes like advance the world spiritually, mathmatically, and scientifically... whats your point?

dont tell me you believe the "life was awful/people were stupid" meme during that period ... because its a blatant falsehood and you'd be 10x stupider than the people of that era for blindly buying into it.

I used to live in a pretty shitty student house with 5 other guys.

>guy is making chicken in the oven
>its the kind that comes with some cajun seasoning from the store or something
>throws the raw chicken on a pan and licks the seasoning off his fingers
>he looks at me and shrugs

>another guy is smelling this bag of cooked chicken he has
>asks me if I think its good
>give it a sniff and nearly vomit on the floor, eyes watering
>he said it was "only" 2 weeks old
>mysteriously catches shigella later that year and blames local resturant

>third roommate only eats meat or frozen microwave entrees
>throws meat in a pan on the stove and goes upstairs for 10 or 20 min
>comes back down to flip and repeat
>wa la dinner
>never washes the pan, same one almost every day
One time he forgot his meat and almost burned down the kitchen.

Also the kitchen was a complete shit hole mess at all times regardless of how I tried to keep it clean. Glad I don't live there anymore.

>>6438686
Well because while such an insult is indeed analogous to a leaky faucet filling the cup but you know what they say:

"The Leaky Faucet fills the cup."

meaning, yes such insults do indeed reflect off the shoulder and go out of the mind easily enough but tell me: would hearing such an unoriginal insult time and time again not wear on your good humors?

Eventually you have to "dump the cup out" to be at peace; and such is what he did.

>>6438368
1st trimester is nationally legal in the United States via supreme court ruling as well as in many places in the rest of the world.
2nd trimester varies by state.

Your point is moot. But I agree with the sentiment.

>>6438687
yer so smart. can i suck your cock?

>>6438686
holy shit is that form real? I knew everything was muddled in bureaucrazy but to the extent that every hurt feeling must be documented?

Im in shock.

>>6438695
Are you mentally challenged?

>>6438693
Funnily enough eating cockscomb was all the rage during that period. But yes I do pride myself on being quite ... well-endowed ... intellectually speaking. Yes... (=:[})F--<

>>6438689
are you defending a tripfag?

>>6438672
Why bring Nationality into this? You retarded, son?

>>6438695
Bottom left, mate. April Fools.

>>6438672
shouldn't you be having your humors checked and balanced?

>>6438705
Oh hahahaha. I was going to say cause yeah I noticed a few spelling errors but I just marked that up to government incompetence L0L.

Thanks for the assistance, without the rude words. (>>6438697, take note!!)

>>6438680
>tfw it turns out to be an elaborate troll and the police fine you for false reporting

Do it anon

>>6438707
heh. my bile productions are top notch i'll have you know, Charles Montesquieu. X[)

>>6438689
I think that's a very interesting way to look at it.

But on the other hand, the simple fact of using a tripfag name allows this weakness and inability to cope to be seen, remembered, and filed away for future reference. Furthermore, it's going against his very goals as a tripfag, who already have a handicap.

In other words, I think he's shooting himself in the dick. And it's glorious.

>>6438712
Wouldn't be a false report then now would it? He's posting blatantly offensive "fantasy" according to you but i'll tell you something - ever heard of public obscenity?

Well that applies to the internet too. His pretense is all he needs to get in TROUBLE. Not me.

I might EVEN get a award for my public service, so the next time you think about condoning the posting of things that frankly make my stomach turn maybe you should reconsider it and say "Hmm... you know this isnt good discussion, my parents raised my better than this"(although in all likelyhood they didnt.)

indian roommate
>constantly babbles in shitspeak on the phone
i'm quite convinced its either techsupport or actual crazytalk
>washes ass in the bathtub every time he shits
>throws trash at the garbage can leabing horrible splatters on the wall

>>6438716
Well you're not a member of the guild so your perspective is a bit naive and offensive, but nonetheless appreciated.

I'll give you a hint: His purposes for posting as a Trip may well not be for what they may well appear at first glance. Deception is more than just the punchline is what I'll say in such a way.

I'll leave it at that. Also on a seperate piece of criticism: I wasn't a fan of this line: "And it's glorious."

Perhaps work on that but other than that you're character is fine, no marks in sight.

>>6438719
>He doesn't wash his ass every time he takes a shit
Gotta give your roommate credit though, he's cleanlier than every Indian I've met. Had one Indian teacher at my school that taught special ed or something. Entire hallway around his classroom smelled like fucking rank ass armpit.

>>6435636
>manning up
>using a trip

Pick one

>>6438721
Have you had a few drinks?

Or are you just a little slow.
Maybe look back and read over because your post is largely incomprhensible

>>6438709
>L0L
>government incompetence
>typing out "hahahaha"
>"Please no bully ;-;"

You should just kill yourself.

>>6438721
>lefedoratip.rpm

>>6438733
excuse me for not buying into the "lol meme" oh wait i guess i did that too oops haha. Anyway, nothing wrong with a little diversity.

But to be fair to me I never said ""Please no bully ;-;"".

And yes I did say Government Incompetence, why did you you put a "memier-than" arrow in front of it?

>>6438721
>>6438714
>>6438709
>>6438695
>>6438689
>>>/out/

>>6438752
>>>/g/

go shill linux GPU Penguino OpenSource somewhere else. No ones buying it.

>>6438758
Ah, nothing better than to see an entire post of replies dedicated on the shrine for all to see, yes... yes.. it truly is a sight to behold.

But make no mistake - it does empower me. Beware.


Bewarreee. Heh.

>-->o (Mommy why do we have to dedicate a post to the god of deception)

>---->O (Well it all start back in time, when the very first offering was given on the slab by a man covered in flame that never died out)

>-->o (oh now i understand)

>>6435636
> 1. No I will not go away. Just because I manned up a long time ago and chose to use make name to accompany my posts dooesnt mean I have to face the bullshit nameless fools like you give me whenever I speak my mind freely on an open forum.

Please be pasta
Filtered anyway

>>6438113
>move good mom out
>call DCF
>get bad mom arrested/child removed
>kick bad mom out (if necessary)
>move good mom back in
>????
>PROFIT!!!!

>>6438766
>>>/b/611417801

>>6435636
You are the worst trip i've ever encountered, and i usually frequent /k/.

I will naturally post LazyFat.

>>6438445
Hahaha, you mad because they didnt want you to come to their party! And they probably mocked you behind your back about how gay you were for baking cookies!

>>6438777
Sup /k/omrade.

>>6438612
> lying on the internet
Nogger pls

>>6438787
Howdy

>>6438689
> he's dropped his trip

My roommate does a few things that mildly irritates or bothers me.

1. He can't really cook but he tries, so thumbs up. When he does make something though, i think he uses as many dishes as possible to make something simple like eggs and then doesn't wash.

2. It could be 2 eggs or something and he will use our biggest pan. (13 in.)

3. When he leaves dishes in sink, he fills sink with water and says he's gonna let them soak over night so he can wash the next day. They usually stay there fore a few days if I'm out and get pretty stank.

4. He freezes everything. Like, i bought cheese to make broccoli cheddar soup, and within the next few days it was all in the freezer, along with deli meats and other things.

>>6438797
Holy shit how did i just realize that

>>6438797
No I didnt I swear to God almighty that I was just intervening in his verbal assault, yeah, like he was walking down jericho road and I saw him taking verbal blows left and right by you guys merely for the name he adopts.

Any righteous man would step into the debate...

>>6438828
yah youre actually worse than he is, congrats

can I get an age?

>>6438842
20 ~[:>[-)]-<---<==|

>>6438869
and where are you from?

>>6438874
The United States of North America :^[]

>>6435625

Haha true. I'm just being a dick online anon, I don;t mean anything by it.

But it really is nice to live alone. Peace and quiet is amazing.

>>6438359
Unfortunately, that's not true. I grew up in and out of foster care, jumping from different family members and family friends. Kids get lost in the system for years at a time before their family may even get to see them again.

>>6438115
Can almond milk also be activated?

>>6435636

> this nigga thinkin he on reddit

bitch please, fuck outta here

>>6438875
this has all got to be an elaborate b8 persona

theres no way anyone is like this

>>6437955
bhaaaahahahah.

Sounds like a fun guy.

>>6438882
guess you need to activate the almonds first then milk them

>>6435602
>living in the cUcK

>>6438445
You should just have drank as much of their beer as possible. They eat yours, you drink theirs.

>>6438445
>roommates party without discussing it with their roommate
>without inviting said roommate
>fuck up his cookies

I'd be mad as hell too. Anyone who wouldn't doesn't belong on /ck/.

>throws keg off balcony instead of takig it with you to GF

You dun goof'd. Did it at least asplode?

>>6438688
>entrees
No main course ever?

>roommate
>about 23 or 24, can't recall
>wants to make spaghetti
>hesitates, turns to me
>"Should I salt the water?"
>mfw


>different roommate
>5 days a week
>two lidless pots with water
>one with pasta
>the other one with a whole chicken leg
>set stove to max
>leave kitchen for 20-25 minutes
>return, drain cooked food
>eat without any seasoning
>don't clean pots, they accumulate a layer of limestone from chalky water

>>6438943
so what

>>6438944
1. How to you live almost a quarter of a century without making noodles once in your life?
2. How can you eat such extremely plain, overcooked food so many days a week?

>>6438935
It's just cookies though m8. Takes like 1 dollar and a very small amount of time to make. Also what kind of faglord makes cookies for a "game club"? What the hell is a game club? Why is that guy making cookies for them? It just seems so gay and unrealistic.

>>6438947
1. mommy and daddy
2. what is being from a Northern European country?

seriously my dad(from Norway) could do that. Last time I was at their house, he had a soup of onion, celery, and carrot in water.
TBH it was pretty good, i must be his son

>>6438956
1. But even then, doesn't one see mommy and daddy cooking once in a while?
2. Yeah, I'm from middle yurop, but the roommate in question was an exchange student from south america.

>>6438966
1. One would hope that the child picks it up from their environment but, as seen by these threads, that isnt always the case

2. alright well i guess poverty

more likely hes probably just a lazy fuck

>>6438758
>>>/out/
Please, no.

>>6438179
You seem like a good dad. I wish you were my dad. I wish I had a dad

>>6435636
God I hate tripfaggots. I can't even take their arguments serieous, it's immediate disdain that overwhelmes me.

>>6438955
It's not about the cookies, it's about sending a message.

But seriously, it's probably not about the loss of cookies as much as it is about a blatant lack of respect.

>Salts the boiling water
>Leaves butter out of the fridge
>Eats American "Cheese"
>Doesn't put fruit in the fridge
>Feeds animals from the table
>Throws out my left overs to fit an entire pot
>Puts memesauce on everything (sriracha)

>>6435636
*you

Corrected twentyfold ;;;;;;;))))))))))))

>>6438767

> mother and child have to find temporary accommodation while DCF processes (for ages I imagine) the case at hand

Wut. You'd be doing more harm than good i reckon.

>>6439038

> putting fruit in the fridge

For what purpose? Unless you're eating bananas that are browning when you buy them, there's no point putting fruit in the fridge.

What, do you go to the store once a month or something? Nigga just buy a week's worth of fruit and consume it in a week.

>>6435639
What the fuck. The shifting colors on this image just gave me the most massive flashback to childhood.

So clear, but it slipped away and now I only know that there is something I should be able to remember, but can't.

>>6439038
>raises the temperature of the water
>perfectly fine
>eh
>usually fine
>not that big of a deal
>needs more context
>probably a gross exaggeration

Oh you're b8ing right :^)

>>6435594
well, fortunately I don't have a roommate, i had a couple cases from some group travels:

>dudes salts a whole steak saying he was 'seasoning', and when I mean salts, it's covering the meat until it was completely white on a thick layer of pure salt. He insisted he knew what he was doing that this was gonnna be the bestest steak ever and obviously afterwards it was shit and overcooked. Not well done, but almost charcoal.
>girl says she prefers loose leaf tea, so she takes a tea bag, opens it, pours directly into the kettle, puts water, let it boil/whistle for quite some time, leaves leftover tea afterwards for a few days in the kettle and says "it's still good"
>same girl try to use expensive coffe powder as instant coffe by putting it into hot milk and complaining it was shit when there was a french press literally next the coffe jar - but she probably had no idea what it was
>girl try to do frozen fishsticks in the microwave and ends up with raw warm fish and stinks the whole apartment, but she guarantees that's how it's supposed to be because anything frozen can be done in the microwave and eats the whole package

>>6439065
We put lemons and strawberries and grapes in the fridge. Everything else like bananas and apples and oranges tend to get eaten up within a week, though.

>>6439104

Good point. The smaller fruits slipped my mind. I keep those in the fridge too, apart from lemons.

Sorry m8

>>6439072

You were molested.

>>6438943
That's a fair enough question.
Do you want to salt the water so that it boils at a higher temperature, or does the actual act of boiling influence the consistency of the pasta, rather than just the heat + fluid thing?

>new roommate moves in
>she a generous 5/10 but chill
>first time away from home
>watch her go nuts with eating sugary cereals and an increasing intake of brownies until the amount of sugar she's eating makes everyone else uncomfortable
>over the 12 months of her lease she puts on at least 15kg

I still feel like at least one of us should have tried to say something to her about her brownie intake. It got to a point where she was making a batch every other day and eating 95% of them herself.

>>6435649
God damnit epic meal time is the original cancer.

>>6439110
Probably not, but I guess it's not impossible. I know roughly the kind of thing I would try to wall off or get rid of when I was younger, physical threats or threats to sense of self / security aren't apt to be one of them. But there is a period of time where things got trippy and there's more or less a blank hole in my memory. I can "feel" some clusters that are there, but my psyche rigidly pushes back at any attempt to access it.

Possible I was engineered for this by something else. Maybe I did it to myself, I don't know what I could've so deliberately buried and walled away.

Uncanny. I've seen that image plenty of times, but only today did it work out like that.

>>6438187
Have you got the one with the guy who was in college and one of his roommates got a hamplanet girlfriend who thought she was hot shit and kept trying to seduce one of the other roommates?

The one with chefbro in it.

>>6439124
I think you need a therapist.

>>6439135
I am my therapist.

>>6439065


idiot, most fruit and veg is kept in cold storage until it gets to the store and you should keep it there too at home

bananas are a rare exception

>>6438793

you are a fool if you don't think shit like this happens in the underclass

>source:
>me
>unwilling member of the plebian tribe of subhuman animals laughingly called human

I'm not letting this define my life. I'm getting out and I will step on every single one of those peices of shit on my way

>>6437955
Like...a cannelloni ?

>>6435636
>using a tripcode equals to manning up

I do a lot of stupid shit when I cook, so I think I'm "that" roommate. I tend to make up for it by cooking for my roommates because my results are good (my methods are just retarded). The worst time was when we all fucked up together:

>we make buffalo wings on Sundays as a family dinner type thing
>decide to deep fry some potates one time in a stock pot
>fill up with way too much canola oil
>I'm just dropping the potates in, splashing oil everywhere and some of it bubbles over
>without an ignition source (electric stove) it's not lighting, we carry on
>have the wings simmering in hot sauce as their finishing step
>my roommate stirs the wing pot with a spoon as I'm watching some fries
>takes the spoon out and says something while gesturing
>a drop of sauce flicks onto the burner under the fries, which by this time is pretty greasy
>ignition. "we're fucked"
>I try to pat it out with towels as the grease fire builds inside this burner
>none of us think to just throw baking soda on it or cover it with a bowl
>smoke alarm starts going off, by this point flames are a few feet tall
>because we're in a dorm, the fire department is automatically called
>one roommate runs to the hall and grabs the fire extinguisher
>he's standing over the stove fumbling with it
>I snatch it from him, pull the pin, and blast the fire
>using a fire extinguisher was every bit as satisfying as I always knew it would be
>sadly we didn't cover the wing pot before using the extinguisher so 6 pounds of glorious hot wings are poisoned
>spend the rest of the night answering to all the fire fighters, police, campus authorities, etc. that got called in
>didn't get in real trouble for it, authorities were all bros
>for example the cop who went in first quietly closed the cabinet that had all our beer in it (none of us were 21)
>mostly the officials were a little excited since it was a "fire actual," not just somebody overdoing popcorn in the microwave
>this was a collective fuck up but I have plenty

>>6435636
>See what being a cunt to me gets you?

You getting instantly filtered.

>>6439162
I love it when people feel the need to post about filtering, ignoring, or blocking someone. It's a generally pretty whiny and bitch-like thing to do to begin, but at least on forums notifying the person carries some sense of utility.

On an anonymous imageboard it's more or less clutter. The other person doesn't change or learn anything by knowing. You get to artificially engineer who's voices you'll be hearing, and you even get that little feeling of power and dopamine spike as you post a snappy comeback then filter them. It's childish and so damn primal.

>>6439168
>maximum overtip

>>6439156
You know theres nothing but dry ice in fire extinguishers right?

>>6439173
>They can't filter me, so they resort to memes and platitudes devoid of any thought
>Maximum overlol

>>6438115
>putting eggs in a cold pan
All of my why.

>>6438882
Beat me to it.

>>6435636

You are my new favorite tripfag ever. I personally think you could be the next Angie.

>>6439179
The one we grabbed was monoammonium phosphate unfortunately

>leaves beans sitting in mug of water for days
>ask him what hes doing
>soaking them, last time I boiled them 3 hours and they still weren't done

>>6439232
>leave beans in water for days
was the water bubbling by the time you took them out?

>>6439179
uh huh...

>>6439235
I'm scared dude, they're still on the counter.
also, why the fuck was he boiling beans.

>>6438955
How does it feel to have no friends?

>>6435636
This is the funniest thing I've seen on /ck/ in weeks.

>>6439102
>>girl says she prefers loose leaf tea, so she takes a tea bag, opens it, pours directly into the kettle

I'd laugh at her even a year later

>>6438484
Holy shit... Is that my sister? Are you in Indiana?

I'd say "inb4 flyover" but cmon, we all know that shit like this happens mostly in flyover states.

>>6439140
it's kept in cold storage prior to getting to the store so that it doesn't overripen.

most fruit besides soft berries and cut fruits can be left on the counter because... shocker... fruits grow outside, at room-ish temp, and grow/ripen well in that temp

>>6439256
m8... You should probably point it out before he causes harm to himself.

>>6439270
I laughed internally, and I still do
outside I didn't say a word because I knew it would turn into a shitstorm
those people can't admit they are wrong

>>6438947
Ive been cooking for almost 10 years and I honestly don't know if its necessary to salt the water

>>6435602
I had an Indian roommate for a year and it took two months to get the fucking smell of curry out of the kitchen.

>>6438395
go on

>>6438955
>game club
A game club is a group of friends you play board and video games with anon.
Usually while eating snacks and getting drunk.

>>6439311
He has them in a toaster oven now...and he doesn't listen. Ever.

>>6439047
>what is moving them back in after DCS starts their case
>tell them you need someone else to help with bills and whatnot

I grew up rich. I know how to cook. My mother always cooked, everyone in the neighborhood was jealous of my moms cooking/ thought her cooking was the best. Learned everything from my mom. I've spent countless hours watching all sorts of food programs because love of cooking.

Room mate constantly tells me what to do and badgers me when I cook.

>roommate smokes a pack a day, drinks 2 monsters and 2L soda every day
>primarily eats McDonald's and pizza
>"I was a chef at chili's once so I know how to cook. Trust me"

>won't eat sushi because the raw sushi grade fish is awful
>it's not real cooking because fish isn't cooked

-
>I'd been cooking asian and he hasn't eaten a thing
>Dumb it down for him one night, shredded cheesy chicken and broccoli from slow cooker
>won't eat it because broccoli was touching chicken

-
>"you gotta add salt and pepper to everything you cook, anon. Trust me"

No shit
-
>old nonstick pan he has is fucked, black pieces chipping off bottom
>Hey man, this pan is falling apart. You should probably get a new one, it's peeling.
>"nah it's fine, trust me"
-
>his "best" knife is a clunky pos that's not sharp
-
>be me, want to make fajitas but no tortillas
>Decide I'll brown the strips of chicken and vegetables, remove the chicken, then add uncooked rice + can of diced tomatoes to pan and let the rice cook in that to absorb the flavor and reduce the sauce in place of tortillas
>browning the chicken and slicing the veg thin when
>"what are you making, anon"
>fajitas
>"oh for that you're gonna want to use Cajun seasoning for that, trust me"
>starts fucking around with my shit
>"you should cut those vegetables smaller"
> I cut them thinner to appease him, then throw them in the pan next to the chicken and season sans Cajun
>nigga goes over there and seasons them again
>throws my rice into the rice cooker
>"oh we gotta use these, they're awesome. Trust me."
>pulls out box of old ass Taco Bell plain taco shells
>(cont)

>>6439452
>I'd been dealing with his shit for too long and already had a rough night, so I get frustrated
>I just wanted to unwind by cooking quietly to myself for the evening

>fuck it, I leave him to do his thing
>dinner arrives
>chicken and vegetables cut so small they may as well have been minced
>unseasoned steamed rice
>everything else is over seasoned because this nigga seasoned on top of me
>stale sad taco shells

It's a bit late, but I'll call him Dog Mouth for future frustrations, since the dogs once stole his dentures

>>6439462
Oh, I remembered more

>don't have that much money, but save up a bit extra so decide to buy nicer, bone-in steaks

>excited because I haven't had real steak in about a year
>Dog Mouth insists he cooks them
>this was before I truly knew the horror of letting him do what he wants, so let him do his thing. After all, he always talks about how good he is at cooking steak.
>Never asks how I want it cooked, but figure he can't be completely retarded
>receive steak
>no color on the outside
>fat left untreated
>I cut in to discover it's medium
>take a bite
>it's just Cajun seasoning and liquid smoke
>mfw

On a more petty note, I used to buy sandwich stuff for when I'm low on cash, expecting it to last me the week. I'll buy a pound of meat, a loaf of bread, and a pound of cheese. Both times I have done this, he has eaten everything within two days. I'm saving up to get my own minifridge.

>>6439462
>I'll call him Dog Mouth for future frustrations, since the dogs once stole his dentures
Even though it's not /ck/ related, you know you're gonna have to tell this one too, right?

>>6439494
I wish there was more to tell.
His brother who is not currently living with us has two yorkies, which are both terrible. Also Dog Mouth NEVER CLEANS UP THEIR PISS OR SHIT FUCK YOU MAN YOU WAKE UP FIRST YOU SEE THIS IM TIRED OF STEPPING IN DOG SHIT AND CLEANING IT ALL UP FUCK YOU.
>ehem
>Dog mouth is missing all of his front teeth
>Leaves the dentures out over night while the dogs were around
>The next day they're missing
>DM tears up the who house looking for them
>he can't find them
>he's convinced the dogs ate them
>has to go toothless for a few days while he waits to get payed
>has to spend 400 doll hairs on new ones

That's what he gets.

My dad lived with his grandmother and her daughter-in-law for a while after his divorce with my mum to save some money and look after his granny because that woman (the daughter-in-law) was (and probably still is, we've kinda severed contacts with those people) an unmitigated disaster. Sad part is my grams enabled her as fuck due to misplaced love for her eldest son.

She's Ukrainian and she'd fuck up even the most basic of national dishes due to laziness and general stupidity.
>boil store bought pelmeni(russian meat dumplings) plain and eat them with no sauce
>complain my Dad's ones always come out better
>cooks and eats the most disgusting iteration of borscht, an already shitty dish, known to man due to the reasons outlined above

Not even kidding, man. And it wasn't for lack of money either, she was just that goddamn of a lazy waste of skin.

>Dad cooks a huge batch of my favorite pasta salad because I only get to eat it there and I only visit for a total of 2 months a year
>Fast forward to the next day, comes home from work
>Furious with me
>Me being a bit of a chubster at that time, 1/4th of the HUGE batch missing
>lol nope, haven't even touched it yet
>Grangran reveals the mistery of the missing salad
>Ukie bitch literally shovelled that shit into her borscht receptacle, using the biggest spoon she could find
>She even left the crime scene with streaks of mayo around her mouth

That bitch would hover like a vulture every time my Dad cooked for me, fucking hell. She would also do all kinds of stupid/fucked up stuff unrelated to cooking all the time. Watched her trying to cut a steel rope with regular scissors in TIM 2 for about half an hour before I took pity on her.

>>6439462
>>6439452
I would've kicked his ass

>chinese flatmate
>takes lid off of electric kettle
>boils noodles inside like its a rice cooker
>mfw get a bit of noodle floating in a cup of tea

>>6439515
>not house breaking the animals
you need to move.

>>6439526
If I knew I could win and I could conjure up anger beyond extreme frustration, I would.

>new girlfriend
>is a vegetarian
>is unable to cook
>dislikes mushrooms
>dislikes asparagus
>wont even eat hard cheese like parmesan, gruyere etc because of MUH RENNET

The only thing worse than a vegetarian is a picky vegetarian

>>6439530
My british roommate cooked canned soup in mine. I just ended up giving it to him because he never fucking cleaned it and it got disgusting.

>>6439534
I will as soon I'm done with schooling and can save up some money in my profession. Rents cheap AF. Although with all of the money he eats away from lunch meat, maybe not.
He doesn't clean the dogs at all either, so they get fleas. All of my life bugs have adored me, to the point where I once had over 70 mosquito bites spanning my shoulders.
I am the only enemy in this house in the eyes of the fleas. My legs are fucked with bites and scars from scratching. Sometimes I scratch so hard in my sleep I bleed with out noticing. Just the other day I made new cuts into my skin from scratching in my sleep.

I just washed the dogs with flea and tick, cut their hair, and bought them flea collars. I sprayed the carpets with anti-flea stuff. When I can afford it I'm going to rent a carpet cleaner to really get them all out.

>>6439486
I read that as nice boner-in steaks.

What have you done to me 4chan, also more Dog Mouth tales from based anon.

>roomate makes dinner
>its a simple pasta bolognese
> puts pasta in water THEN turns the heat on
> starts cooking the meat
> watches TV while the meat almost burns
> pasta is eventually way beyond al dente
> "dinner is served anon!"
>sause is fucking ketchup
> he actually went to cooking school (can make great desserts though)

I dont understand people who use ketchup on pasta/pizza. Fucking disgusting IMO

>>6439553
Find better roommates, man, cheap shit aint worth that kind of suffering.

>>6439546

WHAT EVEN?

>>6438692
Just because it's legal doesn't mean it shouldn't be legal.

>>6435636
>Edgar
ROFLMAO. that was his last post in this thread.

oh shit, my sides, lol whew. I tried to read this thread and got derailed at that post, lol

>vegetarian roommates
>never do dishes
>everything they cook is various veggies boiled to a mush

>>6439010
London?

>>6439635
socially speaking, all we can operate by are the laws in place

>>6439542
she better suck a mean dick

>>6439232
Perfectly normal to soak certain beans for 24-48 hours.

>>6439486
Why would you take his unsolicited advice or let him cook your food?

Why would you let him eat your food?

>>6439072
Probably holofoil cards or some shit

>>6438066
>>6438128
>>6438251
>>6438304
>>6438612
Jesus christ, people who fuck up this badly at raising kids should be sterilized.

>>6438955
Are you so fucking retarded and insecure you have to label something as common and gender neutral baking is as "gay"? Did your dad beat you growing up because you weren't manly enough or something?

>>6435618
Manchild gtfo

>>6439530
>>6439546

Giggled at the noodle, lost it at canned soup. What the fuck are these people thinking?!

>>6439125

>>6439579
>>6439797
I really wish I knew. I honestly have no fucking idea why he kept doing that. I think it's because all our pots were probably dirty and he couldnt be fucked to clean one.

>>6439657
>Be a lazy asshole vegetarian (It's the laziest way to keep me from being fat at this point.)
>Spice cupboard only has salt, pepper, cloves of garlic, oregano and cayenne.
>Only real "fresh" herbs I use are cilantro and chives if you want to count them
>Literally 80% of my meals are random assortments of whatever vegetables are on sale and something like black beans with above

On the plus side, at least I keep them from being mush.

>>6439800
one of the best greentexts
checked

My roommate isn't a bad cook but he has some bad habits.

>Rarely washes his dishes when he cooks, he'll wash his plate when I cook but often I'm always washing pans and shit.
>When he cooks the food is good but he lets crap get stuck to the pan and doesn't bother to wash it so it adheres even more.
>Leaves cups on the coffee table.

Not a big deal but strange:
>Uses a spatula for everything.
I think its cause he grew up poor

>>6438686
>>6438695
I remember when I did S1 (HR) work in the Army we would hand these out to the new Privates when they were processing into the battalion. Some of them would actually filling them out saying we were dicks. Shit like that happens when you staff an HR office full of combat personnel.

>>6438680
>they'd probably be lenient then
no, they wont be. DCF is fucked. like he said.

>>6438779
Sweet fucking jesus.

>3 pieces of chicken in breadcrubs
>nothing else
>everyday
>we order Chinese once
>lemon chicken
>lived with him for 2 years
>get sick all the time
>tell him it's his diet
>No i eat fruit at lunch, it's fine
>get's a job as a teacher (how?)
>no more chicken
>10 fish fingers a night
>for the omega 3

>>6435636
Enjoying the taste of sperm i see

My housemate makes a ludicrous amount of money but he eats the same thing every day
>granola with strawberry yoghurt for breakfast
>tinned tomato mackerel on toast for lunch
>two PB+J sandwhiches as a snack
>pasta with ground beef and tomato sauce from a jar
The only time he ever eats anything different is when we have company

>>6440226
granola, yogurt, fish, bread, peanut butter, jam, pasta, red meat, tomatos

not a bad diet for a daily thing. its weird to never change what you eat, but its not ike hes eating hot pockets 4 times a day

>>6435636
Are you the same Edgar?

>>/ck/thread/5772014

>>6439800
>>6439823

> cross of a death metal singer and an elephant seal

there are no orbits that could hold my sides

>>6440232
Oh I completely agree that it's a balanced diet, I just cannot imagine eating exactly the same thing every day.

>>6439797
That it's easier to pour from something designed to pour than from a pot, what, are you stupid or something? Did you really not realize why someone would do that?

>>6435594
your place must smell horribly

>>6440402
it does. also he leaves milk containers by the trashcan with the caps on, and they have exploded multiple times spraying rancid milk everywhere. i wish i was making this shit up.

Who here is ready for the saga of Nguyen?

> on Army Active duty in Fort Lewis
> living on the barracks with my roommate at the Harold
> We get along great
> next door to us is our favorite Vietnamese chef Nguyen
> When he is not yelling at his friends and family in his native tongue at midnight over the phone he cooks traditional cuisine of his homeland on his barracks room
> and it smells so fucking rank!
> marinated beef tongue, pig eyeball soup you can't this up!
> the smell of his cooking infects the entire floor
> company command thinks we are living in filth and it's all of our problem
> forced to clean the entire barracks one weekend
> Sergeants also want to inspect our rooms
> they open Nguyen's room
> He has two live fucking chickens in a cage he was going to eat

So who wants more?

>>6440453
Post moar fgt

>>6439256
>also, why the fuck was he boiling beans.

um

that is how you make beans

are you a troll?

>>6440466
You fucking got it!
>>6440453
> A month after Nguyen and the chickens
> we are still ragging on him for that
> then he ups the stakes
> regulations forbid us from have pets, except for a fish tank with approval from the commander
> Nguyen buys a 35 gallon tank with filter
> spends like 200 dollars
> me and my roomie start to smell cooking seafood
> actually smells edible
> couldn't be Nguyen
> go into hallways and see if he is in his room
> nope
> hear running water in latrine
>open door and there is Nguyen with a live king crab on his hand as he runs water over it
> begs us not to tell nobody
> We fallow him into his room
> he fish tank is filled with live clams, muscles, some type of carp fish and crabs
> all live
> water is solid brown
> WHY CAN'T YOU BY YOUR FOOD CLEANED AND FROZEN LIKE A NORMAL HUMAN BEING?
> his aquarium is closed down less than 3 days later by the Sergeants

>>6439368
Still sounds like some shit highschoolers would do. If you want to play games with friends just say you are hanging out with your friends, why call it a club unless its some stupid school club?

Not the person you responded to btw

>>6438763
>>6439124
>>6438828

>>6440388
It was more of a rhetorical question. Calm down, you rude twat.

>>6440493

>amazing

> several weeks after the fabled fish tank fiasco
> the entire barracks starts to stink
> like a seriously funky smell
> like holy shit is smells like fucking garbage
> a smell that had layers of complexity
> first of cabbage fermenting
> then you get the settle hint of wet fart fallowed by wet dog
> with a spicy after smell that burned your nostril hairs
> I would rather be around the smell of burning shit with diesel fuel
> I would rather be trapped in a portashitter 3 weeks over due of it's cleaning in the 140 degree heat of Iraq
> that scene in Spongebob when they make the foulest tasting thing ever and it burns off Patrick eyebrows?
> it was kind of like that
> after a brief and I do mean brief investigation by or command staff it is discovered Nguyen was fermenting Kim Chi in his barracks room
> that smell never fully went away.

>>6439800
>behemoth
fuckin' A

Also for some reason I imagined foodbro as Tuco from Breaking Bad / Better Call Saul. Makes the text even better.

>>6439553
Take the dogs to an animal shelter. Tell them you found them on the street.

>>6439829
>uses a spatula for everything
I bet you are the type of person who has a specific peeler for every different type of vegetable

>>6440540
He probably doesn't want them to be put to sleep

>>6439553
none of those things work. take off the collars, throw away the shampoo. purchase good quality flea bombs for the house, and a good quality topical for the dogs. plan a day where every living thing leaves the house, bomb it, and that day apply the topical. come home, problem solved. keep applying the topical every month until the first frost of winter.

source: im a dog groomer/breeder

>>6440493
Hahaha, wow. He didn't just go to the galley/mess?

more?

>>6438113
Thats a load of bullshit. Where do you live? Call them you stupid faggot, that kid is gonna die or something.

>>6438876
I like peace and quiet as well but I think it would be more fun to live with a good friend, which I'll be doing soon

>>6435636

Go back to reddit nigger

>>6440561
barracks was not set up with one, we had to use hot plates, microwaves, toaster ovens, and skillets.

> this was the straw that broke the camels backs and killed cooking in the barracks for everyone
> we all assumed Nguyen was butchering animals in his room but it could never be proven
> Nguyen is again cooking something unholy
> I am about to leave to go to the PX and get some booze
> I walk past Nguyen door with it slightly ajar
> suddenly I am mauled by something sharp and feathery in the back
> it's a fucking chicken
> with no head
> blood is flying everywhere out of the chicken's neck
> all over the floor, the wall, me
> I tactically shit myself
> it looks like a murder scene from CSI
> Sergeant on duty hears this commotions and runs up stairs
> I am on the floor, covered on blood and feathers trying to hold this still flapping chicken > Nguyen is standing over me with a butcher's knife
> MP's called, EMT's called, commander called, everyone and his brother is at our barracks
> I have to give a full report still covered in blood
> mfw

>>6440298
I'm considering doing something like that just to keep a very simple meal plan for myself, then go for the more weird and unique when I eat out.

>>6440677
>tactically shit myself
>myside.ini

Also, checked.

capped and saved for future generations.

>>6435636
>Just because I manned up a long time ago and chose to use make name to accompany my posts
This is the most autistic thing I've ever read on this board.
>I MANNED UP AND TURNED ON MY TRIP CODE
>YOU WERE A CUNT TO ME AND NOW I'M ANGRY
>YOU ARE GONNA GET CORRECTED

>>6439521
>borscht receptacle
>Watched her try to cut a steel rope with regular scissors

>paki roomate
>loves food and alcohol
>cooks amazing meals from all over the world every evening despite working full time
>knows I'm Celiac so only makes meal with g free flours and pastas
>washes and cleans after too
>has my breakfast and lunch ready in the fridge to take to my work before she bikes to her job
>blows me if meal not too heavy
>tfw she's my wife

>>6440899
Is she qt?

>>6439065
Because eating cold fruits is delicious. Especially pears, grapes, apples, melons, watermelon and papaya.

>>6440904
Mfw not a racist reply
Sure, but I'm cuter
She used to be a /b/tard @ 14 so a little fucked

Naked wedding cake, creme brulee eggnog (winter wedding, focus on taste not fondant). Cake toppers not to scale.

>>6439800
THE ONE AND ONLY thanks man.

>>6435636
MY FUCKING SIDES

>>6441034
Damn those are so cute.
>tfw forever alone. ;_;

>>6441152
Mrs. Anon says no, that you sound adorable and so you will find someone nice even if you don't think it. As far as I've learned, she's always right... Wife: "learn to cook and eat well, keep your pecker up, and only jack off to girls within your league and you'll be happy". Solid advice.

>>6440500

Because if we called it a club we could get together with other groups and use University ball rooms for LAN parties and vidya events.
We could even get those events sponsored and shit, letting us get free stuff.
I didn't even see three quarters of the "club" member but twice a year.
Do you hate free shit, anon?

>>6439800
I realize wish I had a chillbro, foodbro, and bonybro (without the cuckolding gf) in my life. Sounds like so much fun (whenever lardass wasn't around).

>>6440677
>I tactically shit myself
I woke up the fucking county laughing so hard. All of it motherfukken saved.

>>6440730
Tomorrow themed for people who like the dark.

>>6435905
>Pretending

>>6441188
brwaaaaaakk nerd alert

>>6441195
really*

Jesus my hands are retarded.

>>6439829
>Uses a spatula for everything.

What do you mean by "everything"? Does him flipping a burger with the same spatula he flipped a pancake rustle your jimmies?

>>6441178
Tell her I'm grateful for her advice but she got the gender wrong. Will keep honing my culinary skills.

>>6440453
beef tongue is delicious you faggot

>>6438339
:U

>>6438051
>>roommate takes sausage

Laughed.

>>6441034

Cutee :3

>>6441219
>Not joining clubs because you read a green text once
I was also in the Judo Club and the Beer, Wine, and Spirits Club
Shits fun

>>6441242
r u a grill?

>>6439363
>wanting the smell of curry out of the kitchen
kek

>>6438937
entree in america means main course.

>>6439452
>it's not real cooking because fish isn't cooked
He's not wrong.

>>6441281
You tell me :^)

>dog bowl cheerios baby/truck trade trashmom
>army cook vietnigger FUBAR story

Quality thread, gents. Top hole and all that.

>>6441324
;^)

>>6440548
Thank you, I appreciate it

>>6440540
Cant, they belong to the brother that's gone. I've contemplated letting them run out the door and onto the highway though

>>6440899
Post a pic of her

>>6439542
anyone who's vegetarian for ethical reasons wouldn't eat any dairy at all

how can anybody hate mushrooms

>>6440534
I pictured foodbro as the jock guy from Sit Down Shut Up, and the whale was the fat bitch from Cleveland Show.

>>6435602
Good man

>>6439452
>smokes a pack a day

Why was this relevant to anything

>>6441555
because his taste will be dulled horribly from all the smoking and the house would stink if he smokes inside.

>>6439800
Damn fine story, it could actually make a really cool cartoon. I imagined it all in cartoon and I like how the main character wasn't even the OP, it was foodbro

>>6438687
The Dark Age myth is false, art was terrible during that time and philosophy floundered.
Nobody gives a shit about your petty science and technology.

>>6439038
>>Leaves butter out of the fridge
You're supposed to do that, that's why butter dishes exist, let's you have spreadable butter and butter that you can use for baking always on-hand.

>>6440677
>>6440493
>>6440453
He actually sounds like he belongs on /ck/

>>6438943 reporting in again, I remembered more:

Same roommate as in first story:

>fellow fa/tg/uy
>weekly tabletop evenings
>his turn to cook for the group
>makes rice (in a rice cooker, wow!)
>adds shredded cheese and and diced bologna
>dinner is served

For comparsion, the other way round:

>my turn to cook for the group
>make chili con carne
>"It's to hot, I can't eat that."
>thank god I planned ahead and got one of his favorite dishes
>everyone eats glorious spicy, beefy chili while he eats instant ramen
>"The smell makes my eyes water!"
>mfw

Well, can't say I didn't expect this to happen, after all, "Pepper, garlic and onions are too hot!"...

>>6441932
>associating with plebs

>>6438326
I was this kid when I moved out on my own. I'm sorry, world. I didn't know.

>>6441932
>Pepper, garlic and onions are too hot
fuuuuuuuuck

>>6440677
>tactically shit myself
loled and checked

>>6435636

>>6440483
>boil
no, you simmer.

> Lived with a lesbian who smelled like cat piss and her hoarder girlfriend for two years
> Neither could cook but tried to, hoarder would buy shitty unitaskers all the time and never clean them
> cat piss never cooked anything on any heat setting lower than the highest
> didn't understand how smoke points worked
> would make steak by putting so much oil in the pan it would be deep frying instead of searing and would be cooked to absolute death
> anything cooked would sit on the stove for days until it either went rancid or I threw it out, accompanied with a bitching from her
> once came back after two weeks at home and we had FUCKING MAGGOTS in the sink

>>6441653
It's kinda like the Great Gatsby in that way.