/ck/ - Food & Cooking

Who actually goes to church?

Deviled eggs.

>>6324047
I do, but to Catholic mass, we don't have picnics as often as say the baptists, man do those protestants love to eat.

>>6324058
It's called fellowship, you heathen.

>>6324074
I call it a free lunch, you don't even have to go to the service, just mingle in the lobby afterwards.

>>6324058
I remember being Catholic. We had those little wafer things during the communion. They tasted like cardboard, but I kinda liked the taste.

I wonder how they make those things.

>>6324084
What are "things that never, ever, happened", Alex..

>>6324107
He speaks the truth.

Notice also how baptists tend to be much more hefty than the Catholics... eating too much.

>>6324044
I love fried chicken with a heaving helping of potato salad.

>>6324124
It shouldn't come as a surprise that the Bible Belt and the Diabetes Belt cover pretty much the same parts of the country. If you look at the delicious foods at the average church picnic they're all insanely high calorie stuff. Go at that kind of food regularly with any gusto and you'll be obese before you know it.

>>6324163
The Catholics have the same kinds of food, but they show much more restraint and don't have a picnic every chance they get, haha.

I mentioned it on here before, but we got a Belizean couple attending our Meetinghouse in the last year. We had a potluck this last summer and they brought this chili-like goat stew with potatoes that was fucking wonderful.

Before the Belizeans started attending, our potlucks weren't very good. I don't think we have a single vegan at the Meeting, but a lot of the stuff brought tends to be vegan "just in case" and is not generally very good.
The more traditional American foods during winter potluck are always delicious: white chicken and dumplings, yellow chicken and dumplings (which is better than the white one, fuck the haters), meatloaf and mash potatoes, pasta bakes and the like, but the summer potluck saw horrible atrocities cooked out-of-doors, such as hockeypuck-like burgers, cheap-o/shit-quality hotdogs (98¢ for a pack of 8) and really, really overcooked chicken legs.

Summer at the Meetinghouse is all about the veg food (grilled mushroom caps, fire-roasted corn, various salads) but winter months are all about meat dishes because the vegan stuff (such as quinoa-stuffed acorn squash, tempeh stew and the like) is fuckterrible and only about a third of the veg stuff (like mac-and-cheese and cheddar/broccoli bake) are any good.

I might have mentioned this other one before, too, not sure: I used to work for this LDS branch president (basically, the Mormon equivalent of a bishop) as a personal cook for his family and thier obscene numbers of regular dinner guests from the church. I occasionally attended church with them because why not, that's why. Their church was populated with a bunch of southeast Asian immigrants, one of which was a Burmese woman, the only Burmese there. No one spoke her language and her English was shoddy, but she was very kind. For a church picnic, she made this peppery noodle salad with pork and eggs and all sorts of other stuff in there. I'm not sure what was in it, but it was fantastic.

The only church picnics I attended were in South Dakota. I only have memories of Jell-O salad and horrible overcooked mystery meats.

Deviled eggs...muhhahahahhahaha

>>6324177

And ghost toast!

>>6324044
I remember I really liked finger sandwiches growing up. My mom also made some bomb-ass peach cobbler and I would get pissed when I didn't get any because I didn't get in line soon enough.

I've always wanted to go to a church picnic. Was raised by atheists

Are you allowed to just start going to a church or do you need an invitation? I would be by myself so I don't know if that's creepy or something. I feel like they would kick me out if I just showed up one day.

>>6324097
>I wonder how they make those things.

It was Jesus, anon. You were eating Jesus.

>>6324193
They welcome everyone.

>>6324166
>The Catholics have the same kinds of food, but they show much more restraint
Maybe during Lent, but I have a tough time thinking Catholics exercise more restraint - among Protestants I know Catholics have a reputation for being the ones given to drinking and premarital sex.

I think it's more because Catholic people have roots in places like Italy, Southern Germany, France and Poland. These are places where deep frying is not the favored method of cooking, and people do not live in mortal fear of vegetables.

>Cheesus Crust
I guess it's technically grilled cheese, but calling it this is way more fun

Toast Jesus approves of this thread.

>>6324193
As long as you tip the plate they pass around, you are good to go. They usually have a special baby room, if you are into that sort of thing.

Layered salad is food of the gods as far as potluck fare goes IMO.

>>6324372
That looks absolutely retarded. Who would make that over a regular salad? It serves no purpose.

>>6324372

How am I supposed to scoop that out, getting a bit of every layer, without fucking the who thing up?

>>6324383
>>6324397

>get there first
>take all the bacon/cheese/dressing
>profit

This thread is giving me Vietnam flashbacks of my old Mormon days and ALL THE FUCKING GREEN JELLO WITH CARROT SHAVINGS INSIDE. And then there was the youth dances where the punch got spiked with GASP! CAFFEINATED DRINKS .

>>6325694
Ask me how I know that you're not Mormon nor were you ever raised Mormon. Go on. Ask me.

>>6325880

Just because your ward wasn't stereotypical doesn't mean mine wasn't.

>>6325694
don't you guys go to hell if you drink caffeine?

>>6325890

My old ward thought soda was okay, but anything past that was evil. But that doesn't matter anymore. I've been out of that cult for around 5 years now. Coffee and beer are wonderful things.

>>6324097
I was raised catholic and I was 14 before I found out that those wafers were real and not just something from tv.

My church just diced up a loaf of day-old bread from a nearby bakery and added it to this chalice thing full of wine and during communion, everyone just got a mushy, kinda grapey christ cube.

And my church didn't really do picnics, but we hosted the Ukranian festival in my city every year and the sausages, cabbage rolls and perogie things were pretty good.

>>6325882
Except the fact that the church holds no stance on caffeine at all, only on tea and coffee, which gets misunderstood by people outside the church to mean "caffeine." But it doesn't.

>>6325890
Mormonism doesn't really believe in hell and would hardly believe that anyone would go there just for drinking coffee.
The Mormon concept of hell is more like earthly prison, complete with free education courses and libraries and stuff like that. In fact, it's called "spirit prison."
It doesn't much resemble the otherwordly torture chambers of other religions. Basically, sinners are sent to hell/spirit prison to learn what their sins were, atone for those sins and study scripture. After their debt has been paid with time, atonement and education, they get to leave hell and move to the lower parts of heaven if they repent, ask forgiveness and accept the gospel as taught by Mormonism. If not, they get banished to the outer darkness.

My sister decided to become mormon when she got sober for some reason. She wont buy things on sunday now. Maybe she just wont buy alcohol on sunday I don't know, I've never asked her to pick up anything else.

Everyone in my family makes fun of her constantly now. I understand people that want some religion but actively choosing one of the crazier cults is just strange.

>>6324199

>>6325938
Mormons don't spend money on Sundays because they're not supposed to work on Sundays and they don't want to give anyone else the incentive to work on Sundays. It's somewhat admirable, when you really think about it. They feel that working on Sunday is a sin and don't to want to encourage others to sin for their benefit. Kinda the opposite of Catholicism of the Middle ages and Renaissance, that saw money lending as evil, yet promoted Jews to start banks and lend out money because "well, they're going to hell, anyway!"

>>6325949
That's pretty cool. I learned something today.

>>6325938
is your sister hot?

>>6325937
>If not, they get banished to the outer darkness.
what do they get to do there?

>>6325956
she looks a bit like if mila kunis gained 100lbs and had curly blonde hair and green eyes

so no

mormons seem equally nice, cool, and insane

that's a better mix than a lot of religions seem to offer

>>6325937

Hey, TBM. Did you know the tea and coffee ban was done not because of "divine revelation", but out of spite because the ladies of the church didn't like the men drinking and smoking in church?

>inb4 This wasn't taught in church, therefore its not true
>Muh D&C
>Muh Book of Abraham

>>6325962
there's a sega dreamcast with panzer dragoon and the only soda is moxie

Cheesy Hashbrowns.
Heated up as leftovers with hot sauce, holy shit it's amazing.

If not that, chicken and dumplings.

>>6325974

They are only truly nice to you inside and out if you are a true believing Mormon, white, Republican and rich. Anyone else gets niceness on the outside and hatred on the inside.

>>6324124
Now that you mention it the Catholics in my town are much thinner than the Protestants.

>>6324044
Every Easter my church prepares a cochon de lait

>>6326033
In my neighborhood they call it lechon.

iirc when I was Catholic as a kid there were bake sales and pancake breakfasts. Not sure how often they happened. Almost never went to them. Knights of Columbus probably did more stuff like that. Wasn't until I was a teen they started having parish fairs which lasted a couple years before they stopped. I don't recall ever a picnic.

Large picnics like that and family reunions are more of Southern thing. Doubt protestants in Europe do much of this picnicking.

Pancake breakfasts, namely from Saint Alfonso's parrish.

asparagus rolled in a slice of bread

Burgoo.

I live in western Kentucky. Barbecue is popular here. I live a very short distance from Owensboro, which is Kentucky's go-to barbecue capital. There are also tons of Churches and a lot of them are way into barbecue. When you go to the Owensboro Barbecue Festival, the majority of stands are run by local Churches, all making chopped mutton, barbecue chicken, ribs, pork, and burgoo.

If you're not familiar, burgoo is basically a spicy stew that was originally made with whatever meat and veggies were available, but nowadays it almost always has pork and/or mutton in it. Making burgoo is usually a social event. Local Churches will host big picnics or fund-raisers and whip up gigantic batches of it in huge drums.

There's a local Catholic Church that does it the best. I go to every one of their burgoo events to help out. At the end of the day there's always a lot left over so they fill up empty milk jugs with the burgoo and send it home with whoever wants it. I walked away with two gallons last time.

Heat that stuff up and serve it with homemade cornbread. Best thing ever on a cold day.

>>6326136
I went there
they didn't even fucking have margarine and they had some bullshit excuse that some guy stole it wtf

>>6325977
>thinking i'm a tbm
lolno
I'm not even Mormon, let alone TBM. I'm Quaker. I just worked as a personal cook for a Mormon guy and his family and learned stuff while I did.

And no, I didn't know that, but I might have guessed. Source?

I thought the reason was a bit more sinister, like a test. See, the WoW also prohibits eating meat in times of plenty (if you live in the US, you're /always/ living in times of plenty), but next-to-no-one follows that part. A lot of Mormons, even TBM, don't even know that part of the WoW.
I thought the WoW was set up to see how far the church can take their micromanaging of peoples' lives and diets.
Tobacco is banned! (little opposition)
Tea and coffee is banned! (little opposition)
Liquor and wine are banned, but weak beer is okay! (little opposition)
Forget that; we changed our minds and now drinking any alcohol is banned! (little opposition)
Meat is banned! (lolwhat? NOPE)
That's the actual progression of the WoW, with each subsequent addition being a bit more difficult for people to give up entirely. This led me to guess that the whole thing was a social experiment to see how much control people were willing to give the church over their lives. I have no evidence for it, mind you. It's just a guess. I could have leapt before looking here, not sure, but it seems to make sense.

>>6324058
http://healthland.time.com/2011/03/24/why-going-to-church-can-make-you-fat/

Im not religious, but i love the idea of a church lunch. It seems really wholesome.

>>6324169
I have never had yellow chicken and dumplings, what exactly makes it yellow?

>>6326660
turmeric

>>6326665
Sort of. See below.

>>6326660
It's made with those bright yellow chicken-flavoured bouillon cubes. The chicken is poached in water that some of the those cubes has been dissolved into rather than milk. Because milk can thicken a little on its own, white chicken and dumplings isn't always thickened with roux (often, it's not), but the yellow always is. With a blond roux. Maybe it's a Pennsylvania thing.
I'd imagine the one made by Plain Quakers is made with proper chicken stock rather than bouillon cubes because PQ view convenience foods as a violation of the Testimony of Simplicity.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plain_people

>>6326773
>>6326665
Oh, and I said to "see below" because I've no doubt that turmeric or some other food-dye ingredient is used in making the bouillon cube bright yellow.

>>6324044
Pickled baby octopus, or really anything with lots of tentacles.

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn! Fhtagn!

>>6324044
I love church. As a poor college student, I attend weekly (actually sit through a service once a month).

Then it's free food time. It's a lot of white people food like potato salads, pilaf, and things easily made into bulk.

Semi-related: My mom's church does events where they sell hot dogs to people and have a singing.

Instead of hot dogs, what else could we sell? I've been saying burgers, bratwurst, ribs, etc. We've done barbecue once, but that didn't happen last year because no one was willing to do it and they said I couldn't do it by myself even though I was willing.

Help.

I had the idea of Feaster Sunday, but my mom was telling me no one would show up because they spend their time with their family.

>>6329317
>pilaf
>white
It's Iranian and Iranians are not white.

>>6329321
Hot dogs are cheap, require no knowledge of cookery, and have the highest profit margin for the lowest effort. $2 gets you eight dollar-store hot dogs and eight dollar-store hot dog buns which can be sold for a dollar each for a rate of return of 200% that of investment.
The only thing more profitable is pizza but that requires quite a bit of know-how and preparation space. The ingredients for a single, large crust will cost about 35¢, the tomato sauce another 25¢ and the cheese could be as little as 13¢ or as high as 50¢. A large cheese pizza, at most, would cost $1.10 and provide eight slices which can be sold at $1-$2 each for a rate of return of about at least 536% that of investment.

>>6329542
This is america.

Rice pilaf is quite american. See Rice-a-roni for a commercialized version.

>>6325694
>ALL THE FUCKING GREEN JELLO WITH CARROT SHAVINGS INSIDE
Just came into the thread to post this. Isn't it awesome?

>>6325937
>Except the fact that the church holds no stance on caffeine at all, only on tea and coffee, which gets misunderstood by people outside the church to mean "caffeine." But it doesn't.
Except for the fact that, in fact, the Church does in fact tell people not to drink caffeinated sodas. Fact.

>>6325917
>christ cube

>>6329542
>Iranians are not white.
Correct, Iranians are Aryan. That's where the name "Iran" came from.

>>6324208
>Chicken fried chicken
>>6324204
>>6324204
>>6324204
>>6324204

>>6326180
I'm from north carolina and we have a similer thing called Brunswick stew. Its super thick and if you stick a fork in it and its made right the fork wont fall over and just stand there.
Each church gets super into making it, and they even have a compition that only a few churches get into.
The big things that go in it are chicken,corn, spices of your choice and an ass ton of butter and is sooo fucking tasty.

>>6332685
This is incorrect.

>>6329542
>pilaf
>white
Pilaf always looked blue to me.

>>6332711

Are you from near the Charlotte area? In the city over we have a church that gets super into it and does it annually.

>>6324051
with out doubt., deviled eggs, potato salad, home fried chicken, chicken pie, cold meatloaf, cream corn broccoli cheese and macaroni casserole. for desert, jello cheese cake with blueberry topping, or lemon topping, coconut cake,or strawberry rhubarb upside down cake. or pound cake glazed with lemon/orange and powdered sugar. Methodist, but share a graveyard and back to back with Babtist. Also with in 2 miles 7 churches, ranging from Roman Catholic, Greek orthodox, Seventh day, a Synagogue. You don't do that every day. and you say a blessing (hail Mary full of Grace, let me win this stockcar race) Just kidding, lighten up and get along. We thank you Father, for the food we are about to receive. Bless it to our nourishment, that we may help others..Long winded blessings are a no,no, any faith

>>6326033

Are you in Louisiana?

I lived in Mansura, LA until I was 12 and that was a big tradition there. They even had a whole fair around it.

>>6324044
watermelon, chicken, greens, grape drink.

>>6332678
Except that it doesn't. :-)

Not gonna lie, the church potluck is one of the things I miss about church.

There really is something special and communal about eating together, one of the things I think the Eucharist/Lord's Supper was originally supposed to engender in people.

Also potluck food is awesome. Sometimes. Them church ladies get SERIOUS about potato salad and casseroles.

I still like to go to some of the Polish and Hungarian churches during their festivals when they're selling pierogi and paprikash dinners.

>>6332781
>Long winded blessings are a no,no, any faith
You've clearly never been a Presbyterian. Probably the most literate Christian branch, but holy shit are they long-winded about everything.