/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>5916121

>taking instagram pics of food in a michelin starred restaurant

You could at least act like you've been there before man. People at the other tables will get a laugh out of you at least.

>>5916121
I hope they throw you out

>>5916128
I don't know where you've been but people like OP are now the majority, not the other way around

>>5916128
>>5916221
The staff have been incredibly friendly and informative. Had a chat with a random diner too. It's not awkward or weird at all.

My table for one. They gave me a corner table so i have an excellent view don't have to worry about being stabbed in back.

>>5916248
well go on then

Inside the envelope on the table is my menu.

>>5916257
I can already tell this is going to lead to dragon dildos

The start of a 17 course odyssey.

Oyster meringue pebble with a leaf that tastes super oystery. And an oxtail dumpling.

>>5916262
That's a box of rocks, anon.

Squid ink crisp with chicken skin and some food blobs.

A deep fried crust filled with smoked eel and chunks of fatty ham.

>>5916276
Can you eat the nest?

>>5916128
>Caring about the opinions of strangers this much

A closer look.

>>5916274
You're right. You have to bite each one until you find the meringue pebble hidden in there.

>>5916258
That's post dessert, dear.

The nest was definitely not edible.

>>5916291
>You have to bite each one until you find the meringue pebble hidden in there.

Are you shitting me right now?

Scallop tartar with caviar. Clean, sea taste

>>5916291
>bite each one
you're joking, right?

>>5916291
>inedible rocks on the plate
>inedible birds nest on the plate
Nothing pisses me off more than putting something I can't eat on the plate. These fucks would get Chopped so fast.

>>5916291
Jesus cut your nails. Its gross

>>5916291
unless you're a grill, those nails are unacceptable
>>5916301
Is that you, Scott Conant?

>>5916248
Why a table for one, Borneo? Sitting there taking pictures of your food must make you look a bit lonely. Don't you have a special someone in your life?

>>5916304

Yes, me. Leave my waifu alone. I couldn't be there with her today, you wanna fight about it?

Hey you're the anon from that other thread

Keep going, what's the service like? Are you going to have some wine?

>>5916307
You're kidding, right? Nobody ACTUALLY has a waifu. It's just one big 4chan joke.

right?

An amazing layered pouch of slow cooked lambs tongue, turnip, cream and truffle. I'm going to beg for the recipe.

>>5916295
>>5916299
I was just rusing, nerds.

>>5916317

This is no joke. She is my waifu. We just haven't met yet.

Post a picture of the view. They have a farm, right?

>>5916322
okay

A freshly baked loaf with lard and butter.

>>5916304
I'm just here for the food. Totally worth. My internet boyfriend is a Pescatarian so he wouldn't be able to enjoy it even if he were here.

>>5916309
Service is excellent, the first few dishes came out at a swift rate so there hasn't been any long pauses. Staff is friendly and attentive but not overly so. Very knowledgeable about the food. No wine because I don't like alcohol. They've been keeping my cup topped with pleb water though.

If you're the guy who was thinking about to Melisse alone, just do it. It's a delicious experience.

>>5916332
Do they explain each dish as they put it down

>>5916320
That looks and sounds incredible

>>5916326
The owner does have his own personal farm where he plants random shit for experimenting too.

Here's a river running through the village, Cartmel.

>>5916352
Keep posting nigga. Fuck the haters.

Salt baked squash, Maran egg yolk, chestnut crisps and squash broth.

>>5916348
They do, in much more detail than the menu. The service is really just perfect.

>>5916276

>>5916352
Those cute delicious ducks.

>>5916302
>>5916303
>not knowing borneo's a person of the vaginaed sex
You're new, yeah?

>>5916309
>>5916274
>borneo
>anon
...

A beautiful venison tartare with candied fennel, mustard, charcoal oil which gave it a fresh off the grill aroma and mustard.

>chef literally shits on your plate
>autists pay $$$$$ because it's "Michelin"
>"yea yea tastes good, i'm so sophisticated, you peasants can't understand class, f@ck 99%"
>meanwhile in Africa

>>5916332
That "lard" looks more like bacon render. It's a bit too dark to be lard, no?

>>5916371
My thoughts exactly

>>5916372
Pipe down anon

>>5916377
god damn that looks great.

>>5916375
go back to a vegan thread faggot

>>5916378
>telling a person of terrorist-descent to 'pipe down'
I legit thought it said 'pipe bomb.' Damn my durka-durka background.

>>5916373
>eating raw meat
Humans never fail to impress with their stupidity.

>>5916375
>>5913632

>>5916383
>he's never had tartare

Lobster, roe, scurvy grass, hazelnut crumble and chive cream on a crisp.

>>5916375
Waaaaaa people like thing

>>5916376
There's crispy bits in it but it's definitely lard. Probably from the roast porks

>>5916385
>he was never born a human

What does pizzle taste like Borneo?

>>5915675

Underneath the crisp is lobster tail with carrot puree, lobster cream and watercress.

>>5916387
Mm that looks the best so far.
I've never had lobster. Going to South Africa soon so will look to change that.

>>5916387
Looks god tier

>>5916387
Finish the bread you ungrateful sod

>>5916401
It's clearly there to accompany the other courses you pleb.

>eating a whole loaf of bread as a course

>>5916383
It is venison. You can do that.

>>5916274
Kekked

>Posting in epic bread
>OP is based and awesome thanks m80

Artichokes, goat cheese cream and stuff. The first disappointing dish I've had. Cream was nice but the rest was bland.

>>5916404
:(

ok

>>5916414
>expecting artichokes and goat cheese to not be bland

>>5916291
nice hands, fatty

>>5916399

This

Grilled plaice and mussel with roast radish, dill and potato. A bit bland as well.

>>5916394
Seems like it'd taste like piss and jizz.

>>5916401
I would but I'm pretty stuffed. Had to ask them to slow down the dishes a bit so I don't leak.

>>5916419
Good point.

>>5916414
Did you tell them this. Curious to know how They take a negative comment

>>5916433
>leak
what do you mean by this?

>>5916443

I have to admit I got kind of hard when I read that too

Tender shoulder of suckling lop with a crisp square of skin, roast celeriac, crispy kale, elderberry sauce and a splash of porky jus. Traditional and tasty.

Apple and rosehip tart. Blackberry granita over browned butter ice cream with caramelized crumble bits. The ice cream was fantastic.

>>5916436
Nah, I can appreciate that some things are just personal tastes.

>>5916443
When you eat too much it'll come out of your bellybutton so gotta be careful.

great thread, cheers borneo

Thanks for sharing. This is a quality thread.

>>5916458
The ice cream looks good

>>5916458
I do not get your humor.

Blueberry ice cream, sheep milk ice cream spheres, a milk crisp and apple marigold. The marigolds were amazing, tasted exactly like minty apples.

Honeycomb mousse, caramelized walnut biscuit crumb and perilla atop a few slices of poached quince.

>>5916472
Is that fucking styrofoam?

>>5916478
It's frothed and dehydrated milk. Very light, crumbly and delicately milky.

>>5916483
I'm a retard, how much did all of this cost?

Finally, three tiny ice creams. Apple, cheese and damson plum.

>>5916485
£120. Not as wallet destroying as I thought.

These set plates are incredibly ostentatious. Puts me off the very idea of eating.

Borneo, can you confirm something for me? My best friend is Chinese, and he takes pictures of every meal when he goes out to eat. And, I see many other Asians do this as well.

You being of the slanted-eye variety, is taking pictures of your food something you're encouraged to do in your culture? And why do you do it?

>>5916489
A pretty fair value for what you just got. Seemed a little ice cream heavy at the end, but that's hardly something to complain about. How was the plum ice cream?

>>5916257
>No steak option
You blew it

>>5916121
Awesome thread, thanks for sharing the experience.

>>5916493
Yeah it's not for everyone. I do love food though, and I'd do it again.

>>5916499
I know a lot of my classmates would post random pics of food to Facebook. People like food and looking at pictures of food so I guess there's that. I also like to have a memento of a really good meal. It's like taking a picture with Mickey when you go to Disneyworld.

>>5916501
I have a sweet tooth so it's perfect for me. The damson came in a raspberry cone which complemented it perfectly.

Even the bathrooms are fancy. You get little towels to dry your hands with.

>>5916503
>option
guffawingharlots.jpg-large

>>5916509
My pleasure, homies. I'm glad people enjoyed this thread and I hope it'll encourage you to give fine dining a chance

I'll make one of these threads when I go to Chipotle later.

>>5916521
pls do

now, time to post the bill.

>>5916551
A clean £120

>>5916472
Too fishy I'd say, but alot of technical work shown which I'd want.

The fact u said some were a dissapoitment said u needed pallet cleansers.

Cigars are also on the menu

>>5916578

Oh man, if only america wasn't run by butthurt miami cubans and shrill israelis, we could have these things too ;_;

>>5916572
>L'Enclume
Nice, around the price I'd expect. Thanks for showing the whole experience.

>>5916516
>encourage you to give fine dining a chance
I would think most here who aren't poor and resentful about it would jump at the chance for a meal like that.

The cheap bastard in me balks a little at the cost of entry, when I know many places where I can get a very good dinner for two with wine for less than what you just paid. But that's a different thing. A tasting menu is its own world, and worth doing every once in a while when you know you can trust the place. And Michelin stars are usually a good sign you can trust the place.

>>5916582
Tobacco is shit on your taste buds.

In fact alcohol is shit too. Wine matching is a bunch of crap.

>>5916593

First genuine laugh of the weekend

Thanks man

>>5916578
not an amerifag.

Are you expected to tip at a fine dining establishment? if so, how much did you tip

>>5916573
I can still see how other people would've enjoyed those dishes, they just weren't for me. Everything worked really well together when you manage to get a bit of each element into one mouthful.

Right outside the restaurant is a field of sheep.

>>5916593
>Wine matching is a bunch of crap.
You've obviously never enjoyed a plate of oysters with a glass of Muscadet. I bet you drink soda with your meals.

>>5916599

Is that your porsha, borneo?

Did you get all dressed up for it?

Post pics of what you're wearing.

Can't leave Cartmel without trying the sticky toffee pudding. Might have this later tonight.

>>5916597
I don't tip either.

>>5916603
I wish. I'm kinda poorfag so I walk or use public transport

>>5916591
I know what you mean. But now that my eyes have been opened I will do this more.

>>5916611

This

Also your panties

This is my first time seeing you around, borneo, but I fell in love right away.

>>5916486

How many fuckin rocks does this place have????

>>5916595
Don't lie restaurant manager. The dishes are designed to be enjoyed by themselves, with wine pollutants.

>>5916622
Kek.

Thanks for sharing with us, truly eye opening experience.

>>5916615
>poorfag
>spend 120 quid on pretentiousness on a plate

>>5916611
I did shower and shampoo my hair, I think I looked spiffy. Black tshirt under a black jumper with little gold buttons, black jeans and black shoes.
I asked an old lady to take this picture for you.

>>5916620
Food is the way to everyone's heart

>>5916678
>pretentiousness on a plate
It's a tasting menu, not a fucking Denny's breakfast.

>>5916678
I do actually have a job, and I save up and budget so I can eat nice things.

>>5916687
You look like my Thai roommate from several years ago. She was awesome.

>>5916687
Your old lady had Parkinson's.

>>5916693
I'm from neighboring Malaysia which would explain the resemblance. We have the best cuisine in the world.

>>5916695
Technology is hard.

>>5916700
I know where Borneo is, Borneo. ^_^

>>5916706
Eheh. You'd be surprised at how many people don't know where it is.

>>5916706

There are three countries on Borneo. Four, if you believe the flips (few do)

>>5916700
>Best food in the world
>Not Singapore

Silly Bumi

>>5916756
Singapore is like the NYC of Southeast Asia. Everyone from there thinks they're the center of the universe because they have a shallow, mediocre, but broad selection of foods from around the neighborhood.

>>5916756
>Singapore
>>5916700
>Malaysia

Yeah, that's nice, especially malaysian, but really, It's not quite Indonesian, is it?

>>5916711
I guess. Like you, I am also a foreigner living in the English-speaking world. I showed someone pictures of my hometown and where I lived growing up and the shops and stuff around there.
Their reaction?
>those are tall buildings and skyscrapers and modern apartments! you have cities in your country!?

Never mind that we have a higher standard of living than the people here where I live currently. Dumb people will be dumb no matter.

>>5916764
NYC has some of the best restaurants in the world.

Any place you can get Authentic South East Asia, South Asia and East Asian food is godly

>>5916773
>half my countrymen live in mud huts
>we high standard living now

>>5916774

I live in NYC. It's not as godly or authentic as you think. But yes, we have a little taste of everything.

>>5916397
I hope you don't enjoy that with a side of fresh Ebola.

>>5916782
There is not a single mudhut in my country, Anon. I guarantee that. :-)

>>5916784
I live in NYC, too. The godly shit is usually expensive or tucked away in immigrant neighborhoods. It is here though. Most folks are either too busy or can't be bothered to seek it out though, which is why so many here settle for expensive mediocrity. That's way too common here.

>>5916812

Yes, I know about corona and flushing and all that.

You can be the best ubeki-beki-bekistani restaurant in the city but still be a mediocre ubeki-beki-bekistani restaurant if you're the only one in town.

That's just how it is, sorry.

>>5916807
Congrats Now go back there.

>>5916128
Agreed, I would not appreciate this if I was in the room with you OP. Poor form.

>>5916782

>half my countrymen live in trailers
>the majority of my countrymen live below the poverty line
>America is a first world country

This shit looks way too high brow for me.

I don't "get" most of the dishes. Every one of them looks like they plopped an edible modern art exhibit in front of you.

Thanks OP! I bet that lambs tungue was amaze.

Awesome thread.

Is it entirely a fixed meal or are there any options as far as what you want? I would rather have all savory dishes than the dessert dishes even that they looked really good.

Price doesn't seem too high for the quality and amount of courses. I can only imagine what the kitchen is like there. So much work.

>>5916824
You poor, sensitive creature.

>>5916839
It's also unusual combinations of high quality ingredients into scrumptious mouthfuls. I got to try a bunch of new things today.

>>5916844
That whole dish was one of my favorites. It was cooked sous vide for two days and brined for a day before that.

>>5916815
>corona and flushing and all that.
>the best ubeki-beki-bekistani restaurant in the city
#1 Uzbek Palace is in Coney Island

>>5916864

Hence "and all that". I don't expect we should shit up op's thread with a pissing contest of listing the most obscure neighborhoods, so let's take it to the other thread where we're having a parallel conversation.

>>5916853
It's fixed, but cab change a little day to day because the ingredients they get vary and they don't want to be tied down. I had no idea what I would be eating when I arrived. They did ask me what my dietary preferences were at the start, so you could possibly tell ask them for more savoury things than sweet.

All the green stuff and veg is from the owner's private farms, I imagine that would save the price of importing out of season stuff as well

thanks for the pics and info op.

>>5916516
you did God's work here

>>5916863

>sous vide for two days and brined for a day before that

Woowowoowowowoowowoowoowowow

>>5916886
>>5916889
Thank you for your support anons.

>>5916926
Yeah niggas cray. But you can really see how they got to two Michelin stars.

>>5916882
I want someone to sit down with a spycam and say they are a gluten free vegan and get the reaction

I'm late, but good thread. I want to try going to a Michelin place one day but I'm worried of acting like an obvious pleb.

Also while I love good food, I consider getting me full the primary function of it, so I'm having a hard time justifying the expense for a handful of bite-sized portions of little works of art made of edible materials. Guess I'm a food lover but not food snob.

>>5917008
>I'm worried of acting like an obvious pleb.
That really shouldn't be an issue. At a really high end place the staff is trained to make you feel comfortable. Anything you may not know they'll explain to you. There's even a guy whose job is to help you with the wine. They are there to see to it you have a great experience, not to "out" you as a pleb. They want you to leave wanting to tell everyone about the great experience you had while making plans to return.

>the expense for a handful of bite-sized portions of little works of art made of edible materials
But look at how many courses there are on a tasting menu. Really, how big do you want the portions to be when the meal is going to be served in over ten courses?

well fuck OP I wouldn't have the balls to photograph my food in such an establishment but i'm glad you did because this thread is great

This is probably the only style of restaurant/menu I'd be willing to spend "a lot" on. I buy cheap shit all the time and in my ignorant youth would scoff at paying above $20-$30 for a single person's meal, but now I realize the significance in such sorts of restaurant. You get to experience a nice little haul of very interesting and perhaps unique foods you may otherwise never come across (or hear of, by common talk). For those who truly enjoy food, this is like a day at a theme park. Hah, wherein which you'd spend more money on possibly a less interesting experience, in my opinion that is.

Thanks for the thread, a little adventure.

>>5916994
They were really professional and obviously good at their job, I imagine they would be chill about it. He became super smiley and looked pleased when I answered, ''I'll eat anything, really.'' Just be friendly and polite.

It was incredibly filling, it was a full 17 courses m8. +extra bread that I couldn't even finish anyway

There's some restaurants that may do that, but I can guarantee L'Enclume is not.

>>5917065
It was no problem at all, I had a friendly chat with the people at the next table about it too. As long as you don't have flash and sound on no one cares. You're not actually disturbing anyone. Hell I ate half of the meal with my fingers and no one even looked at me twice.

>>5917081
That's exactly how I feel about it now. Currently researching the area for other similar restaurants that I can make a pilgrimage to.

>>5917023
Fair points all this, and quite reassuring too. I may just give it a go now, at worst they'll never see me there again.

Thanks for the thread and advice! Would go on food date if I ever ended up in your parts.

>>5917301
>I may just give it a go now, at worst they'll never see me there again.
Go for it! You've nothing to lose and only delicious food to gain. Ayyy, I'm always up for food dates.

>>5916121
A+ OP

>>5916419

how the fuck is goat's cheese bland

>>5917374
>I'm always up for food dates.

>mfw it's like a 30 minutes flight away

I shouldn't tease though, me missus would be unimpressed.

>spending 120 britbong bux for vomit on a plate
>could have just had a v8

you could have used that money on a dentist appointment too...

>>5917571
No worries, it's all 100% platonic. I'm completely faithful to my internet bf even though he's a faggot. Take your missus out to a fancy meal m8.

>>5917620
Peasant pls.

>>5916320

what material is the pouch?

>>5917796
It's just regular porcelain. Not gonna lie, I did try to nibble it a little.

>>5916262
>>5916276
>>5916291
>>5916298
>>5916320
>>5916363
>>5916373
>>5916377
>>5916387
>>5916396
>>5916414
>>5916433
>>5916447
>>5916458
>>5916472
>>5916477
>>5916486
Artsy fartsy pansie ass shit

>>5917857
that's like, just your opinion and stuff, man

>>5917754
>Take your missus out to a fancy meal m8.
I do every so often, but tonight was our cooking night (hence poor response times).

>>5917800
Good to know, been bugging me too. I'd come buckets if they served a dessert in a similar pouch made of marzipan.

I'm ambivalent towards the idea of fine dining. The emphasis on weird presentation and the huge price tag for such an ephemeral experience are pretty off-putting. But god DAMN I would love to go to this restaurant. Every dish looks and sounds amazing. I didn't know some of these things even existed. Milk crisp, holy shit, that is some Willy Wonka food wizardry.

Incidentally, is solo dining not considered weird at places like this? Or do you just have balls? I feel weird even getting fast food by myself. I would not set foot inside such an establishment unless I had comrades.

>>5916375
>meanwhile in Africa

Every fucking douche that says this has never actually done anything to help Africa, you just like whining. I've done volunteer work in Zambia for almost 2 years and I've literally never said "hurr durr what about the starving kids in africa" because I have an actual perspective on what is realistic behavior in different countries and I'm not a huge fucking cunt.

>>5916320
Is that smoked Toblerone?

>>5917800
damn i was hoping it was a pastry pouch of some kind

>>5917374
if you're in cambridge, let's go to midsummer house

>>5916994

I went to the french laundry with someone who is celiac and has crohn's (yeah, they're genetically blessed) so they have a bunch of food restrictions and while we notified them of this ahead of time they fucking made a whole menu for us that was gluten free and didn't contain any of the foods that tended to make his crohn's flare up. You couldn't even tell that it was deliberately made with food restrictions in mind. It was amazing and I kissed their asses so much because I was so appreciative.

But yeah, if I were a server at a place like that and someone said they were a "gluten free vegan" I'd internally sigh so heavily.

>>5918015
Same, I kept on hoping they'd have a some sort of edible dish. Would be fun to eat.

>>5918138
The milk crisp was made by frothing milk, adding glucose and some other stabilisers then pouring it into a dehydrator. It's crazy how they come up with this shit.
I know some places don't accept solo reservations, but I think it's because they profit more from full tables than because it's weird. I was the only person eating alone there, but it didn't 'feel' weird to me. I just told people I was treating myself to something nice and they saw it as something positive. As long as you keep your attitude positive and confident you can get away with a lot. It's the fine art of not giving a fuck.

>>5918174
It's fossilised Toblerone.

>>5918176
Oh my god I've actually been to midsummer house when I lived in cambridge, went there with a friend to celebrate finishing our A levels.
It was magnificent, I'd love to go there again sometime if it wasn't so goddamn far. I've been looking up tasting menus on google for the past few hours and there's not much around where I live. So sad.

>>5917301

You should go, they won't be mean to you if you're a pleb. Anyone who works at those places, like the other guy said, is very very used to regularly serving people who are way more pleb than you, and they won't make you feel uncomfortable.

>>5918138

Solo dining isn't considered weird anywhere, people are just self conscious about it.

>>5916248
>My table for one.
Good for you! Fine food is the highlight of travel, no matter if you're alone on business or what.

>>5916414
>Artichokes, goat cheese cream and stuff. The first disappointing dish I've had. Cream was nice but the rest was bland.
Hrm, it looked the most delicious TO ME. Isn't that something?
Maybe you needed a wine pairing to liven it up :P I wonder if it maybe just needed some salt, haha.

Nice thread OP, thanks for sharing.

Too bad you didn't had wine with it. Enjoying GOAT meal without GOAT wine is little sad.

great thread OP

>>5918245
>Artichokes
>Maybe you needed a wine pairing to liven it up
Artichokes are shit paired with wine. They fuck up your ability to taste wine.

>>5916838
>>the majority of my countrymen live below the poverty line
>>America is a first world country
Clean running water/sewer systems go a long way to being actually civilized. Ask Europe about their fear of anything that isn't bottled water in most major cities if you want to talk about what defines first world, it's the ability to bathe and drink water at whim. No points for using antiperspirant or not bathing in cologne.

>>5918138
Every experience is ephemeral.

>>5916248
you got your pet rock though

>>5918288

Except the love of Jesus Christ our Saviour, yes, all things fade.

>"I am great OZYMANDIAS," saith the stone,
>"The King of Kings; this mighty City shows
>"The wonders of my hand."— The City's gone,—

>>5918287
Sorry if I missunderstood your post but... you just said that you can't drink the water in most big European city and have to buy bottles?
You joke?
If somebody has a bad water system, its usa!

>>5918223
>Fine food is the highlight of travel
I agree with this statement 100%. When on vacation I like to just browse their grocery stores and look at all the different foods they have.

>>5918245
>>5918248
I don't like the taste of alcohol. Got a shit tolerance anyway, a single drink can waste me.

>>5918305
Her name is Pebbli.

>>5916373

wow!

>>5918287
>Ask Europe about their fear of anything that isn't bottled water in most major cities

I don't need to - I live in a Major European city, and we don't drink bottled water. By law, all EU states have to meet certain water purity standards.

About 40 years ago, people used to say you couldn't drink the water in Spain, but even then they were wrong.

You seem to be quite uninformed. I met this guy at a party in the states last year who was convinced Belgium was under Sharia law, and nothing could convince him otherwise because he'd seen something on YouTube about it. You're like that level of uneducated.

>>5919283
>I met this guy at a party in the states last year who was convinced Belgium was under Sharia law, and nothing could convince him otherwise because he'd seen something on YouTube about it. You're like that level of uneducated.

So he confused Belgium and Sweden, big deal.

>>5919283
> I met this guy at a party in the states last year who was convinced Belgium was under Sharia law

God I love what the internet has done to people

>>5916383
o the irony

>>5916964
You're good people, Borneo. Keep being it up.

>>5919468

Ha! It's funny because you're pretending to be as stupid as that other guy. Such jokes you have in America. So funny guys.

>>5919477
>God I love what the internet has done to people
No, living near idiots isn't enjoyable, unless you are an idiot yourself.

>>5919587
>implying I live near any of those people

I come to 4chan to experience cultures different from my own. Stop getting so emotional about this stuff. It shouldn't affect you unless... ?

Thanks Borneo. Might wanna check out The Trip (the series) - they visit L'Enclume as well.

Sorry but didn't likewhat I saw. Pretentious bullshit, raw food everywhere, shitty parts of animals that no one wants that fags in touches have convinced everyone that they're the ultimate foodie item.

>>5919674
>touches
Are you trying to spell toques?

>>5916372
>Knowing namefags on 4chan

Yea those fingers are so fat that they look like a man's. So instead of cutting her nails I guess she should hit the gym

>>5916572

What the hell, i though that would cost in the 200€+

>>5919670
Will look it up, thanks for the rec!

>>5919674
Ok pleb.

>>5919952
Ikr, that works out to about £7 per course. I'm definitely going back there in spring.

>>5919889
I'm sensing some hostility here.

To the front page with you.

>>5922222
fuck you asshole, stealing my get

>>5922227
It's even more funny because I didn't even try.

It looks so good. I've decided to go there someday.

Thank you, OP.

>>5916615

I just need to clear something up here - did you not leave a tip?

>>5922289
>leave a tip
America please go.

>>5922303

I'm British, so I wouldn't tip the stupid levels that they do on the over side of the pond, but if you go to a restaurant in the UK and the staff are nice to you, you leave a tip. Being a poorfag isn't an excuse.

beautiful stuff
thanks for sharing

>>5916419
>artichokes
>bland

maybe in ameriland.

>>5917800
What the fuck, man. Why not just use a plate.

>>5922457

Artichokes aren't the most flavoursome food. That's why you usually get so much butter with them.

Thinking goat cheese is bland I can't understand.

>>5916372
>borneo
I'm fairly old (2009) and I didn't know Borneo was a she.

I also didn't notice the name, and yet the lack of a trip.

Anyway, hi Borneo, thanks for the photojournalism. We expect you to recreate these dishes in the next Challenge.

>>5922267
Mottainai: shamefurr waste.

>>5922632
You're five years old? Are you sure you should be on 4chan?

>>5919093
The whole entire USA? Like, Florida-is-the-same-as-Chicago-is-the-same-as-Montana USA?

Holy shit, and you yuropeons say we're uneducated. . . .

>>5918305
>go to fancy yuropeon restaurant
>they use rocks to hold things on the tables
stay stone-age, Europe.

>>5916516
You took up space that could have been used for another Chipotle thread. How do you expect them to viral marketing if you take up all the spots on the board with actual food.

>>5916516
You took up space that could have been used for another Chipotle thread. How do you expect them to viral marketing if you take up all the spots on the board with actual food.

>>5916521
>oh god the next fucking post

>>5922754
>Not wanting to see anons culinary journey through the menu at Chipotle

>>5916597

>Are you expected to tip at a fine dining establishment?

there is almost always a service charge included especially when it's a degustation. tipping is still usually welcomed but only because the people that go there are often very rich.

>>5922793

Whenever I go to somewhere fancy, I always leave an extra twenty or more on the table as well as the service charge. There's no point spending £150 a head and then not being a flash bastard on the way out.

>>5922801
>There's no point spending £150 a head and then not being a flash bastard on the way out.

>caring that much about what a waiter thinks of you

>>5922801

it's just a bit silly seeing as the function of the tip is already satisfied by the service charge. but you're hardly alone and i have done the same thing.

>>5922793
>>5922801
>>5922808
>>5922816

Except if you look at the picture of the bill in >>5916572 you'll see that it clearly says "service not included", so if she didn't leave a tip, she's a bitch.

>>5922926

oh yeah, fair play. but if you can't afford to tip, don't. i wouldn't think less of you for it.

>>5922960

I would. She claims to be a poorfag, but could afford to spend at least £10 on taking a train to a restaurant where it costs £120 for a meal, and then some more on a whole shitload of sugary snacks to take home. She certainly had enough money to be able to leave another £15 in tips, especially as she talks about how good the service was. Not tipping is something only a cunt would consider.

>>5923114
>>5922926
It is true that I am a tremendous asshole. If that hurts your feelings you will have to deal with it. Whether or not I tip is none of your business, you crybabies.

>>5922630
The flavours of the goat cheese came through clearly, but it was the only discernable component of the dish.

>>5922289
It's a secret.

>>5916298
Holy moly, this looks delicious. I-if you ever want to do a tasting menu in London or somewhere easily accessible by public transport from London, w-we could do it together. (Actually, lately I've been wanting to try Lima.)

I spent about the same amount for seven courses at Helene Darroze so it really seems you got a great deal. I also found my tasting menu very filling and the waitress made a little package of sweets to take away since I couldn't handle any more after two dessert courses. (The last dessert course was actually quite disappointing, and overwhelmed with dark chocolate with not enough to balance it out.)

>>5923114
As someone who's actually worked waiting in the UK, I wouldn't care if someone didn't tip me, no matter the cost of the meal. The only problem I would have is in wondering if I did something wrong but if it's clear that my service has been at the very least adequate, whether or not I receive a tip is no matter to me.

>>5923114

>Not tipping is something only a cunt would consider.

ain't like that brah

Holy fuck that looked delicious, thanks OP

>>5916320
Am I the only one who gets unnecessarily annoyed with plating like that?

>>5916687
Wow, you've put on a lot of weight.

>>5922926
the waiter of such a place makes better money than you ever will, there's not tips slavery like in the USA anywhere in the world, and especially not in France.

>>5916121
>>5916291
>>5916687

Listen little baby,

You're gonna get a lot of degrading and hurtful comments in this thread, but that ain't what I about.

Let me just say you are perfect the way you are you hear me sugar? PERFECT don't ever change, you deserve everything and anything you want.

stay safe for me baby girl

>mfw thinking about you hurting

>>5916274
topkek

>>5923637

no, but i'm glad you recognise it's unnecessary.

How can this board hate Anthony Bourdain for being a douchy hipster faggot but savor over this douchy artisy plated one bite "food"

>>5923710

because the food is an inanimate object, not a wilfully obnoxious person.

>>5916121
You've been there two and a half days, anon. Is service really that slow?

I'd love to go to a fancy restaurant like this but I'm afraid I'd have to ask the server how I'm supposed to eat everything and it would be so embarrassing.

>>5923794

i don't see how it isn't obvious, but staff are trained to deal with that shit.

when i ate at the fat duck i was with my ex. we got thse beetroot and orange pates de fruit and she popped the purple one into her mouth thinking it was blackcurrant or something (she was hammered, don't get the wine flight if you can't handle your booze). i told her it was beetroot and she gobbed it out onto the table, then tried to wipe it off with a napkin, which just smeared her whole setting in a lurid purple stain, then just laid the napkin over the top and ate an orange one to get the taste out of her mouth. waiter came over and didn't bat an eyelid.

turned out the purple ones were actually blood orange, and the orange ones golden beetroot. heston fucked with us good

>>5923808
Haha, we should have an embarrassing food reactions thread

>winery tour
>mildly hammered
>hilarious friend with babby palate being hilarious
>cheese comes out, first time he's tried blue vein
>face looks like when you give a toddler a green olive and tell them it's a special grape
>wine lady sees this, offers him a couple of serviettes
>he spits out the chewed up cheese into the serviette she's holding
>he spits out the chewed up cheese into the serviette she's holding
>he spits out the chewed up cheese into the serviette she's holding
>her lip curls like a horse and she says, "I was only offering you the serviette ... not asking you to spit in my hand"
>everyone's face when
>I laughed so hard I started convulsing and had to go outside before I fainted or something

>>5923950
>>he spits out the chewed up cheese into the serviette she's holding

Holy shit.

>>5923981
he's one of those really funny but incredibly awkward dudes who's constantly wandering wide-eyed into embarrassing situations

>semi-nude woman at quasi-strip bar asks for donations for her upcoming 'performance'
>friend gets confused and asks her what she's going to sing on-stage

>>5916692
>I actually do have a job, and I save up really hard to piss it away on expensive things I can't really afford, rather than buying things that will be worth the same, if not more 10 years from now so I can have a stable life

>>5923557
I've actually been thinking about that, but London is about 4-5 hours away from where I live... If I could find an interesting restaurant halfway in between would you be interested? I use public transport too, don't worry. I wish I thought to ask for a baggie to go, I'd have brought all that nice bread and lard with me.

>>5923646
It'll be the English Lakes ice cream and pork bellies aye.

>>5923660
That's one of the nicest things anyone has said to me. Thanks based Sam Dong.

>>5923776
>implying im not hidden under their floorboards so I can catch stray crumbs that fall from the tables

>>5923794
I can't speak for all restaurants but L'Enclume was really unpretentious and straightforward. The dishes all came with suitable cutlery, and the ones that didn't could obviously be eaten by hand. The servers are very professional and well trained, they're paid very well to make you feel comfortable. Also they're nice people.

>>5923660
>>5924041
THIS IS NOW A BREAD THREAD

>tfw no /ck/ Brit-meet up.
/ck/ is probably the most sensible board to have meet ups with when you think about it. I'd love to visit more restaurants and while I commend OP for going alone, it's not something I could see myself doing.

>>5924182
Moot tried to organise a /ck/ meetup but he got the shit harassed out of him and cancelled it in the end if I remember correctly. It's a real shame.

On the other hand, I've gone out with someone I met on /ck/ on food dates and I would absolutely do it again.

>>5917857

>I'll never appreciate fine dining or have the palate to appreciate anything beyond Ruth Chris so I'll sit here and call everyone hipster plebs like a whiny little babby!!!

Wow BRO you're so cool and contrarian!!!!

You fucking faggot

>>5923703

>that subtle condescension

brilliant

>>5919674

>pretentious bullshit

Explain what this means. Don't throw around buzzwords like you know what you're talking about.

also
>complaining about raw food and offal meat

man I'm so glad I'm not you

>>5916320

okay, that looks like dirt

>>5923637

I can't stand it either

>>5925358
I kinda agree with him; an avant-garde approach to food just comes off as looking shitty or bland, despite being made in a hilariously complicated way....also way too many flavors packed into a tiny little item.

holy fucking shit; learn to take proper photos. my fucking god.

>>5923646
>>5924041
Okay, as long as you're aware.

>>5916615
Jesus, you're a piece of shit.

>>5923297
>>5924041

If the servers were nice, then you should have tipped. As an example, Simon Radley (1 star) is advertising for a head waiter on £15500 a year, with an average of £4000 a year in tips. Lucknam park (also 1 star) is advertising for a waiter on £16400 a year, and it's inaccessible by public transport. Think about that before you assume that the servers are "paid very well", because without tips they're typically on minimum wage, and with them they still substantially less than the median wage. When I go to a Michelin starred restaurant, I'm aware that the staff are often rather poorly paid, so I'm sure to leave a tip, and a generous one if I feel that they go beyond what I'd expect. To reiterate, you're a dick. I sincerely hope that you get shitty service and underwhelming meals at every restaurant you visit, it's all you deserve.

>>5924182

londoner here reporting in, i would do a /ck/ picnic or something for sure

>>5925316

At the time we had this 20 year old quasi-homeless kid from the bronx tripfagging and shitting up the board with his misspelled remembrances from a vocational cooking school textbook. It's possible things might have been different without him, or, maybe NYC just has a lot of angry weird shitposters (like the time some guy challenged me to an in person fist fight, I'm pretty sure he was actually being serious).

Anyway based on NYC meetups I've seen organized on other boards, I'd have serious reservations about doing that here. Although I might reconsider if it was at a fancy restaurant like Eleven Madison or Per Se, so we could weed out the scum.

>>5925474

>bland
>too many flavours

>>5925524

>Although I might reconsider if it was at a fancy restaurant like Eleven Madison or Per Se, so we could weed out the scum.

don't be a dick.

>>5925528
you can't read can you?
>Look bland
>tastes like too many different things
two completely different things you prat.

>all these British people aghast at the idea that someone might not have tipped at a restaurant
Is this Bizzaro /ck/?

>>5925531

then what the fuck does 'looks bland' mean. what does it actually mean. if it doesn't look like it has little flavour, what does it look like.

>>5925538
like a fucking rock, like a white blip with tiny little blops next to it; literally just look at the pictures. /ck/ what the fuck happened to you?

>>5925530

I'm open to alternatives, but it seems like the worst offenders are hormonal children and the kind of lower class scum who actually consider fist fights to be a normal way to resolve disputes.

A barrier is needed, and money is an easy albeit crude way to do it. I'm open to alternatives but in an anonymous unrestricted environment like this, I'm not seeing any from my perspective.

>>5925543

how are either of those things bland? what exactly do you mean by using this word?

>>5924037
>rather than buying things that will be worth the same, if not more 10 years from now so I can have a stable life

Like a Porsche?

>>5925536

I don't agree with American-style tip 20% for everything madness, but I accept that here in the UK you tip 10%, perhaps a little more. It's probably about the right level for a waiter's wages to reflect the service they provide without them making shitloads more than the people in the kitchen. I don't mind tipping at restaurants, but I'll strongly resist tipping as standard at bars, hotels, in taxis, that kind of shit. That's the American import we can all do without.

>>5925524
I will kick your ass

>>5925316
I don't think it was mooticles, but maybe there was another one. There was one in Chicago, where only three people showed up, one didn't join the other two but instead just watched and took some photos, and one of the other two ended up getting harassed until she quit posting.

michelin food sucks ass and you're a fool if you eat it. You pay ten times more than you would in a normal restaurant and they give you a shitty portion the size of a fried quails egg and ost of the time it doesn't even resemble proper food. And you have to wear a suit or stuffy shirts and trousers to eat it.

My rule is that if they won't let me in in tracksuit I'm not going.

>>5922926
It's England, they don't tip there. I have been assured of this by all the yuropeons on /ck/.

>>5923649
>not in France
Except that this was in the UK. But see above.

>>5923646
Moo.

>>5925512
Waaaaaaaaaah.

>>5925563
Shut up, you're banned, and besides you're Canadian.

>>5922926
It's England, they don't tip there. I have been assured of this by all the yourapeons on /ck/.

>>5923649
>not in France
Except that this was in the UK. But see above.

>>5923646
Moo.

>>5925512
Waaaaaaaaaah.

>>5925563
Shut up, you're banned, and besides you're Canadian.

>>5916257
scurvy grass

kek dafug?

>>5925608
one trivial google search dude. that is all it would have taken.

>>5916262
A box of rocks?
>>5916320
A bag of dirt? And how is that a plate?
>>5916472
Styrofoam?
>>5916276
>>5916486
I don't understand what's with the bird's nest and rocks.

>>5925585

>>5925585

Its okay if you want to deny yourself luxuries in life because you have no class, but that doesn't mean those luxuries aren't worth it.

>>5923660

ye bae u perf x

>>5924182
>>5925316

Man I would do a /ck/ meetup but I don't want my picture taken yet alone posted on 4chan because I am an autist (ugly).

>>5925637

As long as you're a grill and not fat, you cannot be considered ugly.

>>5925637

no one's gonna be mean about you if you don't dress like an arse and do stupid poses for photos. but also no one's gonna take photos of you without your permission and if they do they're gonna get told

>>5925644

I'm the opposite, a skinny male.

>>5925650

I'm more worried about stuttering while ordering or not having anything to say

>>5925622
>what's with the bird's nest and rocks.
It's how you distinguish a classy Michelin-star restaurant from Applebees.

>>5925657

well if ever a meetup did happen and there were more than 5 people attending, i would suggest coming. it's easier to socialise in large groups when you're socially awkward because you don't have to take responsibility as much.

>>5925518

>picnic

why would you do that when there are so many restaurants to choose from?

Its not like you need to book a table at the Dorchester or anything. Plenty of good low-mid range places.

>>5925672

because then people actually bring food and can't embarrass the table by acting out or run off without paying or whatever. i dunno to me it seems more appropriate.

>>5916687
so is this you?

>>5925704

jesus man, how fucking new are you?

>>5925710
brand new!

>>5925612
one trivial 4chan post is more fun

>>5924041
I'd absolutely be up for it (next year, I'm traveling until then).

>>5925543
#rekity rekt

>>5925882

samefag as fuck

>>5916791
He said South Africa ya dingus. Borneo is closer to the outbreak countries than anon will be.

>>5925474
>also way too many flavors packed into a tiny little item.
The food isn't heavily spiced unless you're used to a diet of plain chicken breast with salt.

>>5925480
how do i make proper photo

>>5925512
>£15500 a year, with an average of £4000 a year in tips
I make £14k a year as an intern m8, thanks for confirming my decision to never ever tip again.

>>5925524
>Eleven Madison
Hnnngh. I'd go there anyway if I were ever in NY.

>>5925570
Ick. Britfags seem a bit more well mannered than that at least.

>>5925622
I don't understand any of it either. But it sure tasted good and that's what's important.

>>5925657
You'll fit right in then!

>>5925704
Hey I recognise the two people in the middle.

>>5925860
Sounds gud to me. I might even be back in Bath by then, would be much easier to travel that way.

>>5926312
>back in Bath
Been a while since you washed up, eh?

>>5926324
oh, you card

>>5916332
>>5916387
What's with the lard, anyway? Are you actually supposed to use it like butter as a bread spread??

>>5926335
>misspelled "cad"

>>5926354
eurotrashery

>>5926354
Yes basically. It was ultra porky.

>>5926356
>Computer Assisted Drawing

>>5926312

I don't really care that you've got a shit paying job, that's your choice. What I don't agree with is you unilaterally deciding that you're not going to pay someone for a service you've received so that you can save £15. I reckon you'd be pretty fucked off if your employer turned around one day and told you they were only going to pay you half your wages this month because they'd decided they wanted to spend the money on something else. Had plenty of money to spend on cakes and sweets for the train home didn't you, you fat pig? Try to dress it up however you want, you're still a total cunt.

>>5927016

Americunt detected.

Tipping isn't essential in the UK because they are receiving minimum wage at least. Also, I seriously doubt the waiters at a top restaurant like this would be on a shit wage.

>>5927087

I'm British, dumbfuck. As I pointed out earlier in the thread, waiters at michelin starred restaurants are on minimum wage, plus tips. Minimum wage, £6.50 an hour, big whoop. You tip 10% in a UK restaurant, unless you got shitty service or you're a shitty person. Borneo went on about how good the service was, but decided she'd rather save some cash than tip, so she's clearly the latter. There's no arguing otherwise.

>>5919670
came here to say this:
>eating at l'enclume
>not blowing the bloody doors off
>not being only 16 years old

good show anyways, borneo

>>5927016
>I don't really care that you've got a shit paying job, that's your choice.

And the exact same goes for waiters.
They choose to work for an employer that underpays them thus making them feel entitled to handouts.
People in other occupations are expected to deliver outstanding service without depending on a thinly veiled extortion racket.

Not OP btw.

>>5927016
lol ok man

enjoying my sticky toffee pudding right now, its pretty good yeah

>>5927269
oh hey i recognise that background!

>>5927274
Haters gonna hate, as the saying goes.

>>5925547
He means bland in the same sense one may use it with art. Unappealing, lacking in pizzazz.

>>5927016
>>5927201
>waitron detected

>>5927274
>>5928500

I'm a property developer. Point is that waiters take the job knowing that base pay is minimum wage, and that tips get it up to something more reasonable (though still pretty low). 99% of people in the UK tip about 10-15% at restaurants, it's just a given. I agree that wages ought to be a bit better, and tips more discretionary, like on the continent, but they're not. By not tipping she's spitting in the face of the guys she was praising earlier in this thread, and I hope that if she goes back there they spit in her food in return.

>>5928738
You take a job for what it pays and any tips are icing on the cake. If you don't like it, go get a job that pays better

I don't know how people got so fucking entitled; I had a job waiting tables once and I never started viewing tips as anything other than a bonus on top of my normal pay.

Is this thread doomed now? Because I like this thread.