/ck/ - Food & Cooking

before you guys say this is a joke or try to troll me.

I just want you to know that I care. I want you to all learn something here. maybe you can teach someone else some day.

>>5691108

>I want you all to learn something here

wouldn't it be more effective if you didn't come off as a complete lunatic talking about poop and posting the most convoluted image we've ever seen?

>>5691119
just read it a little bit at a time.

>>5691101

i hope somebody loves you enough to make you take your meds.

/ck/ has the best crazy people
is that rambling guy still about

>>5691283
OP here. seen him all over the place, not just /ck/

>>5691262
I'm insulted.

>>5691314
i'm dave

>>5691319
I'm Not a doctor.

if everyone would just try to read the post and image one little piece of information, one hint at a time, it might make more sense to you all.

>>5691328
i'm not an apple pie but you can eat me you crazy fuck

This man literally has the diet and bowel movements of an infant that can't wipe its own ass. He's living like an old man in a nursing home, and he's somehow proud of that.

I would agree with a lot of what you said. A+, good sir.

>>5691351
fuck off op, you're the only one that can even read this thread

>>5691373
seriously. that image looks like what happens to spiderwebs when they give the spiders drugs.

Most vegans hide their crazy better than OP, but make no mistake, veganism is an illness.

>>5691466
Of course our new vegan mod will be along shortly to delete any posts that are not vegan friendly.

>>5691348
what the....

>>5691351
thanks anon, at least someone gets it. everyone else seems to be preoccupied with being needlessly angry or trolling...

>>5691373
thats not OP I'm OP.

>>5691424
I feel bad for the spiders. the LSD web really stands out.

>>5691466
its an illness to get all my nutrition from plant food? hey look anon, Peace okay, I don't mean anything bad. I Don't want to make you upset. I made the thread because I wanted to share my ideas, if it doesn't speak to you, no problem. to each their own.

>>5691486
maybe the mod isn't vegan but is simply cracking down on unnecessary bickering? did you know that there are trolls who pretend to be vegan and raid meat threads to cause trouble, and then they pretend to be meat eaters and raid vegans threads and cause trouble? maybe they are just cracking down on that sneaky bad business.

anyways, I'm glad you are here participating in the thread... but why are you here if you don't like me...? its like you came to be mean on purpose...

>>5691663
>but why are you here if you don't like me...?


Because i am sick of vegans always trying to proselytize on my /ck/.
Pls go and take your poop fetish with you.

>>5691101

Did you forget to take your haldol today?

how about just eat activia instead?

>>5691809
in her old age she looks a lot like a relative of mine

a miserable old cunt relative

i'll never eat activia, aunt irene! never!

>>5691867
C-can I have your aunts number?

Veganism are for gay.

>>5693408
You say that like it's a bad thing

>>5691784
if you don't like it, why don't you just hide the thread? you take it so insanely personally. are you really that paranoid that you believe this is for you? I don't want you messing up my thread. if I could have hid the threads existence from you I would have.

>>5695877
b/c they come in every thread and shit it up

>>5695880
theoretically speaking, should people begin to alter the mods? would that be a good course of action?

every single thread its been like this.

>>5695938
alert*

>>5691793
what was the point of this post?
>"I don't agree with you or like you so I'll call you crazy"

>>5691101
so /ck/ what do you think? any serious posters here?

So if I don't eat meat I'll turn into a fuckin' wacko like OP?

Gonna have me some sausages for lunch.

We need to start banning these fucking wacko vegans. Enough is enough already.

>>5696500
>>5696514
what is your problem? if you don't like the thread don't come in here. I haven't done anything wrong, I reject your judgment.

>>5696581
Says the guy talking about his bowel movements openly.

>>5696581

Dude I have seen you post this thread or something like it 3+ times now. Stop it.

>>5696693
its very much related to the health of your intestines which is directly related to your diet.

I ALWAYS see anons on /ck/ talk about "ugh bro what foods make the best poops brooo"

yet instead of being like everyone else I actually talk about interesting healthy foods and recipes and combinations of them.

>>5696711
yet you don't complain when you see the same thread about wisdom teeth, college people needing cheap food recipes, someone buying huge amounts of X food "whut do make with dis?", and viral marketing? you should thank me for making such an informative thread and actually giving you all something good to talk about instead of whining about chipotle.

>>5696735
I think you were told to go fuck your mother.

i eat foods cointaining fiber. if i dont, i have a spoon of metamucil. ghost poops always. i can go to a chinese buffet and i'll still have perfect ghost poops.

it's not rocket science. have fiber, poop well

>>5696581
>>5696735

the only thing being discussed in here is how completely fucking mad that image is. it has nothing to do with the content, either; there may be something useful woven into that psychotic cat's cradle of information but the fact that you can't tell just how crazy you seem tells me just how crazy you really are.

i'm not aggrieved by you posting the image--i am genuinely concerned for your mental state.

>>5691101
I just rememind myself of politicians and no problem, the toilet get's filled up pretty fast

>>5696757
I don't use the metamucil I grind up chia seeds. to each their own.


>>5696871
just because you see a large image with lots of big scary words doesn't mean its crazy, you should read things slowly, one thing at a time. It might make more sense to you then, unless you're here to be stubborn and whine.

>>5696906
haha what?

>>5696735
>>5696930
Seek professional help before you end up shooting up a school you fucking nutjob

>>5697041
why would you go to a thread about beans and vegetables and healthy poops and say something so messed up?

>>5691101
>careful to not push too hard and develop hemorrhoids, I use my stomach to push, not head or butt.

If you have to push at all there's something wrong with your diet. You should just have to relax and the poop will come on it's own and not stain your ass.

Source: I have a PhD in poopology.

>>5697611
are you serious? if that was true then every time anyone relaxed they would ruin their pants.

when you go to the bathroom I'm sure its normal to make the appropriate physical motion when intending to "go" without overdoing it.

>>5697631
Of course I'm serious. And you shouldn't have shit waiting at the door so that any time you push (or relax) it comes out.

>>5697638
I'm not sure I properly understand, It sounded to me like you said you're not supposed to push, because relaxing is enough, but when I "go" I push gently, not like HRRRHGNGGHNGG or anything.

I eat lots of plants and fiber and healthy stuff that makes it an okay experience rather than painful.

lmao im the one that recommended the Rogan video

this is too fucking funny that you just paste this on /ck/ every so often

>>5693408

just checking the oil

>>5697821
ya know I can't stop this feeling deep inside of me, because I see everyone eating unhealthy, decent good points are worth posting, if I think they will help someone somewhere. I can hold /ck/ in my thoughts so tight, I let them know everythings alright... and after thinking about it for a while I realized I'm hooked on a feeling, I'm high on believing that I can spread goood tiiiips.

maybe if everyone stops using fluoride and teflon and uses stainless steel, stops eating fast food and eat beans, maybe we can make a good change somehow.

I believe.

thanks for recommending the joe rogan video back then. he can be cool.


anyone got any tips to add to the image/post?

>>5691101
This thread a shit

>>5696930
when people ramble incoherently and jump from topic to topic with no discernible point i am disinclined to pay attention. i really hope somebody loves you enough to help you seek out a mental health professional.

>>5697942
The truly crazy cannot even imagine anything is wrong with them even when everyone is trying to let them know.

>>5691101
thanks for post, op. very useful info

>>5698732
You must be OP.

>>5699171
Y-you too

>>5697942
>>5698040
I don't get what your problem is, just read one tip at a time, one sentence at a time, just slowly go through it and you might find something interesting.

>>5698732
hey thanks anon, I really do appreciate that you appreciate this.
>>5699171
no that's not me.
>>5699191
reminds me of the gamestop copypasta from /v/


I think this is definitely a thread worth posting for /ck/ these things matter to some, not all. this thread is for those "some" that do care. bro fist.

>>5700364
You are in a thread where many are questioning your sanity.
Have you considered the idea that you might be nuts?

If you have to tell people to read sentence by sentence something is wrong with what you have created.

>>5700442
I know that those who are willing to try to try will be able to read it.

I don't really give major significance to anyone who is calling me crazy because they sound very angry and likely have their own problems if they feel the need to join a thread they don't even like and complain instead of ignoring it.

>>5700588
That is what a crazy person says when called crazy.
A sane person usually takes a good look at the situation and does some self questioning.

>>5700623
opinion noted and discarded. unlike you, I have a more realistic view of myself so I don't really doubt who I am.

>>5700718
Too much of that means crazy .
Especially when coupled with your posts which look a lot like the ramblings of someone who desperately needs meds.
If you have ever been prescribed medication for mental instability its very important that you continue to take it.
It will take months to get you back on track if you don't.

>>5700730
You know what, I guess I should know better, I must be crazy to think that I could post an image about eating beans and drinking green tea on /ck/ without having someone like you spend hours
desperately trying to convince me I need pills. maybe you took way too many?
>inb4 "I just got here"
>inb4 OP can't inb4

anyway, as I said the thread is here for those who will appreciate it.

>>5700718
>>5700588

i hope somebody at least looks in on you and checks if you're hurting yourself. it isn't shameful to seek help. you could be living a much better life.

OP, I like the cut of your jib, and I like what you have to say, but it may behoove you to work on your presentation skills. Make things slow and simple, draw people in, and unfold your knowledge in a baby step fashion.

Keep it up, bro, you'll get it eventually.

>>5700944
I would never hurt myself, nor would I ever injure someone else. where are you getting these ideas? please go speak to a psychologist, I fear you may be projecting your own mental instability.

>>5700951
I do agree me presentation is a bit "all at once" and I have nothing against self improvement. I'm just saying is that it isn't that hard to open up the image and just read one thing at a time. most of those things are individual tips. I know it looks a little bit overwhelming but it isn't if you go slow. the text I post along with it is the same thing. one sentence at a time from start to finish.

take breaks, drink some water. relax you know? no problem mon.

>>5700951
You are giving him the idea that his info was too complex. This is not the problem.
It was organized like the ramblings of a mental patient.
This is what has everyone's alarm bells going off.
This poor soul is impaired .

>>5700953
no, you demonstrate genuinely worrying behaviors. it would be unethical to attempt to diagnose a specific condition without having you in my practice in person--but you should very seriously consider seeing someone. it really isn't about judgment: it's about health.

good luck

>>5700971
>>5700975
I don't have any problems, but you sound crazy. good day to ya anyway.

>>5701039
Everyone has problems anon. Just part of being human.
No judgment from me( I am the top post you quoted).
I hope you have a great day and I know you are trying to edify your peers.

>>5701077
I think you're a really silly person for saying the things you said just because you don't agree with me or what I posted.

>>5691101
I shit before I hit the seat, I don't need tips.

>>5701310
this thread may not be for you then.

seeing how this is /poop/-general, is there any way not to get spicy burning shits after eating habanero peppers or will it go away when my body becomes more adjusted to them. I just started eating them

>>5691101
This is fucking schizo

>>5691101
OP, I for one think your chart is very cool. Not so much for the content (I don't care to be vegan) but more for the insight it gives to your thought process.

To many people, myself included, this chart seems very disorganized. But to yourself, it makes sense. You just think differently OP. It doesn't mean your crazy, you just organize yourself in a very bizarre way. Sporadic color coating, tips interspersed in random places, etc. it's fascinating. I would like to think in your shoes for a day

>>5701370
Plus he added all the tips for safe buying and shit.

A+

>>5701370

The color coding comes from the original image that image is based on

>>5701292
the simple fact is you haven't found disagreement on the issues because you are the only person who can understand the private grammar you've created for yourself. please do see someone. there are free clinics. if you tell me what general area you live i will cobble together an appropriate list for you.