/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>5639479
PB Crisps must be manufactured at all times.

No chili, or any like form thereof, or anything that could be construed as chili, may contain any type of bean or legume.

death camps for mayoinasse eaters

No chili, or any like form thereof, or anything that could be construed as chili, may be absent of any type of bean or legume.

>>5639494
>>5639501
>The Chili Wars waged over American soil for the better part of ten years
>120,000 Americans were killed

>>5639479
Shilling on /ck/ gets your chain instantly seized by the government, along with all your assets, and you era parachute dropped on an African country at random. You're dropped on the ocean if you're from Chipotle though. Fuck Chipotle shills.

>Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of cuisine, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of gastronomy, or of the food press; or the right of the people peaceably to engorge, and to petition the Government for a redress of salads.

>>5639494

I bet you like cincinnati "chili" you scumbag

>>5639504

>MANDATORY BEANS IN CHILI IS AN ATTACK ON THE RIGHTS OF WOMEN WE HAVE A RIGHT TO BEANLESS CHILI, SUPPLIED BY THE WORKPLACE AND PAID FOR BY YOU

A well regulated Brigade de cuisine, being necessary to the satiety of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Cutlery, shall not be infringed.

>>5639479
No troll or viral threads on /ck/. Special punishments for vegan threads: any pro vegan trolls are to be fed to fed to animals while any anti vegan trolls are to be used as plant food.

>>5639479
No person may ever awaken another person by uttering the phrase "wakey wakey eggs and bakey" without having first prepared said eggs and bacon for the aforementioned sleeping person. This will henceforth be considered a violation of human rights.

>>5639555

Sounds like you should have a discussion with your wife about that

No advertising.

Get's rid of organic, low <nutrient>, asbestos free!, and the majority of problems of society.

I'm a scientist, used to doublecheck sources. It takes more than a conspiracy theory to impress me. The vast majority of theories opposed to genetically modified food use three sources, exemplified by the Seralini paper, by Don Huber's talks and by a Gary Null documentary.

>1. The Seralini paper got lots of publicity when it came out, but most people didn't follow what happened next: it was retracted by the journal itself.
>2. Don Huber claims he has discovered a germ caused by GM food but he has refused to let other scientists see it. He used to be at Purdue University, and Purdue scientists issued a statement to dissociate themselves from him:
>3. Gary Null. Not exactly a reputable scientist. Among his many conspiracy theories, he has also argued that HIV does not cause AIDS. He used to sell a line of dietary supplements: he and some of his customers almost died of it. As for the movie itself, it quotes "scientists" who are dubious experts, to say the least. My favorite line is from a Rima Laibow: "And of course what happens is that, when their genes are changed, our genes are changed by consuming them." Either she was on drugs or she'll win a Nobel Prize for finding out how to perform gene therapy by simply administering food to people. Sorry but this is a bad conspiracy movie.

>>5639568
Marketing sure seems venomous.

>>5639479
Make it mandatory that when you buy fast food, you have to read the ingredients first, and that water should be free.

>>5639583
Anon, anyone with half a brain and 5 minutes would be able to figure out that A. The only reason we have to be worried about GMO food is that it would allow special interest groups (See- Large Corperations) to put a stranglehold on our food supply and that B. There's been literally no evidence proving that GMO's are harmful to anyone.

>>5639479
Fuck your character limit.

Creating or participating in the following topics: pictures of food from Japan; tipping; kitchen knives; chili; food gore; "would you eat this" coupled with a picture of the most disgusting lard-infused excuse for a meal OP could find; ketchup; rare-done beef spectrum preference; hot sauce; fucking how do I make my instant ramen more palatble; coffee or tea; /fit/ rejects; veganism; bin/ck/o; low budget food purchasing; Chicago deep-dish; fast food chains shilling; bread snobs; food nostalgia and any other shit I might think of.

These violations result in an army squad breaking in your house fully armed, grabbing you and throwing you in a re-education camp for 30 days. Now what happens in these camps is that for 16 hours of every non-Sunday, you are to be anally raped by a team of "re-education personnel" consisting of 4 members. The remaining 8 hours are for sleeping. If you are caught during anything other then sleeping during this period, you lose this privilege. During the 30 days, those people have full, unlimited access to your entire body. The entire crew of these camps is to be consisted of well hung Basketball-American gentlemen and Jonah Falcon. Lube is allowed. The first day, you are allowed to command any of the officers to go "faster" or "slower" as to get adjusted to the following 29 days. If you have any family, they are kidnapped too and forced to watch you for the entirity of the procedures.

The re-education is included in your curriculum and announced on any social media you use. If said social media allows promotion of content, your re-education shall be promoted at your own expense. Your favorite book is to be replaced with "Natural Harvest - A Collection of Semen-Based Recipes" in all of these sites. You are to join any local LGBT associations and actively participate in their events, and allow the use of your face in any of their advertising.

Fuck you people.

>>5639602
4chan, ladies and gentlemen......

>>5639479
vegans die

All minorities are no longer allowed to eat food.
This includes anyone not Christian, regardless of race. White atheists may continue to eat, so long as they don't associate with/identify as a feminist.

You're welcome America, I just saved our country.

>>5639627
>our
The Natives were here first, go back to Europe Ice Monkey

everyone who interrogates vegetarians who keep to themselves about every little thing as if they themselves know all there is about nutrition yet they still drink soda..
butt slaps

>>5639634
Oh you mean a bunch of savages that followed a herd of buffalo over a land bridge?
They didn't discover or civilize anything.
Stay mad, fag.

Anyone who bitches about people liking a certain food on the internet is put to death.

>>5639584
where do you live where water isnt free?
`

>>5639666
Anywhere that water bill's exist

>>5639634

I'm surprised you left it at that, instead of going full-out white guilt there.

>>5639479
I just know that this whole thread is designed to be a honey pot for hardcore trolls to create insane bait to troll other trolls with. just know that my comment said it here. you are now all aware that this thread will only bring frustration.

>>5639527
oh great.. massive bait. first going on to say "no trolls" but then accusing vegans of trolling.

>vegan makes thread
>hey guys you like sala-
>VEGAN SCUM ARGHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>w-why are you in this thread if you don't like salad!?!?
>BECAUSE VEGAN BADDDD!!!

all the vegan trolls that you accuse to exist on /ck/ are simply
>hey guys you like this pizza?
>yea that looks beautiful! I would make with cashew cheese though, just my opinion.
>YOU LIKE CASHEWS! YOU VEGAN! RAGE!!!! *cursewords* *cussing*

or just ordinary trolls that pretend to be vegan and run around giggling when they make vegans look bad and make meat eaters angry.

the real ordinary vegans are getting mega trolled.

the hardest part of troll threads on /ck/ is that you can't always tell which one is trolling or not. the solution to these threads is to take them seriously without getting upset. assume that anon is really making a thread about salad simply because they like salad and *POOF* their thread isn't effective because nobody got angry. everyone simply discussed salad peacefully. additionally the OP making the thread about salad legitimately doesn't get screwed over.

you understand?

>>5639555
how do you know she just wasn't baking a cake with eggs as the ingredients?

>>5639568
if we get rid of organic we must also get rid of corn syrup soda chips cookies all junkfood and meat.

oh no fair now huh?


Organic food is important to many people so don't make a fool out of yourself just because you don't understand it.

>>5639584
this is interesting. if everyone read a legitimate list of every ingredient in their fast food then they might really become aware of how bad it is. of course its their freedom to choose what they eat.

>>5639588
>There's been literally no evidence proving that GMO's are harmful to anyone.

>hey gmo corporation, can you prove to us that gmo food is safe especially with all those extra pesticides? did you do any testing of any kind?

>gmo corporation:Its totally safe! in fact we didn't do any testing at all because we already know its safe and all the effects it will have! have a nice day and give us alllll your money huehu!

>>5639724
You do realize I had punishments for both sides right? Anybody shitting up a thread about like you suggested gets turned into plant food. Same as if somebody starting a thread just to say meat is murder you carnist scum would get thrown to some hungry animals.

>>5639602
everyone has the right to make any thread they want about food and cooking on /ck/ as long as it doesn't break the rules

if you don't like a thread, moot gave you the option to hide that thread so that you could pretend it doesn't exist in your little bubble of safety.

>>5639612
the response this troll is looking for is "OH YEA? WELL MEATHEADS YOU SUCK!" but that isn't the correct way to go about it.

all the vegans are smart enough to realize that this is bait, they don't care about what you do. they just want to eat their vegetables and be left alone.

>>5639646
people who say they are vegan or vegetarian and eat loads of junkfood and garbage are actually a strange breed of hipster that wants to look cool, when in fact they are junkfood snackatarians.

real vegans and vegetarians eat lots of fruits and vegetables.

anyone that says anything against this is totally wrong and severely frustrated that I just spilled the beans.

>>5639749
I did pull a kneejerk there and somehow misread your comment. I do apologize.

I don't really agree with the punishments, I don't think anyone should be punished because nobody is effected unless they reply to the thread. People have the option to hide threads they don't like so that is the best option. no need to make it more complicated.

>>5639734
Corn syrup is caused by US taxing sugar imports. That's a separate problem.

>>5639734
>if someone is against the "organic" food industry they must only eat processed food

>>5639772
Obviously I'm just tired of having so many damn threads hidden all the time. Vegan threads are just a particularly sore point since I can't just filter vegan and be done with it since I might miss a legitimate thread about vegan cooking.

All bottled water is now free

>>5639813
they suggested getting rid of organic food.

as was said, Organic food is important to alot of people. if it was the way grandparents and their grandparents had it etc. we wouldn't necessarily need organic as much because we would have better food to start with.

dissing organic is beyond retarded.

>>5639823
I understand. what I do seems tedious, but actually gets done very quickly.

I turn all the images in the catalog to large, and look at each and every single row of every thread on /ck/

I go down the list of all threads and middle mouse click all the threads I'm interested in to a set of tabs (about 20 good threads sometimes)

and once I reach the bottom and have no threads at all that I care about, I go all the way to the top and hold shift and click a thousand times until I hid all the threads I don't have any interest in.

>100 hidden threads

/ck/ slows down and feels like a ghost town.

YET: have 20 good threads open in tabs.

>>5639844
and has no fluoride or any other additive. and the bottles are bpa free.

>>5639856
Equating the opposite of organic as junkfood is just as retarded.

>>5639479
ABOUT DAMN TIME!!!!!

NEW LAW IN EFFECT!!!!

YOU MUST NOW PAY ME A 500% TAX on any food you have any contact with that does not provided the bare minimum of slow death and disease from malnutrition

>>5639481
If a serious movement started I would seriously be willing to drive my ass to DC to protest/parade/petition to make this LAW, nay, a CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHT to these tiny pieces of heaven.

>>5639479
anyone who does not consume pork is to be shot on site.

Production, importation, possession or consumption of meat or imitation meats is illegal.

>>5639479
Tipping is is now illegal.

>>5639724
>>5639759
Jesus christ, vegans are spastic fucks.

>>5639906
My childhood bro. Right in the feels
>My grandpa comes over
>Anon I found something new at the store for you
>Excited
>Run over see PB Crisps package...
>WTF are those I think
>Bag gets opened taste one
>O M G
A little over a year later the best snack ever made are gone.

>>5640069
Enjoy getting assassinated.

>>5639479
prohibition reinstated
>one less way for people to die slow painful deaths
>no more drunk driving
>less domestic violence
>less violence
>weed becomes recognized as the goat substance to relax with

>>5640093
This. You think its impossible to take our guns? Try taking out meat.

>>5639555
kek

>>5639479
Cut gov't subsidies for cash crops, with exception of funding to emergency supply, and insurance in case of crop failure, all excess funding is now funneled into cooking education.


or destroy monsanto, cuz fuck monsanto.

>>5640100
I think it's totally possible to take your bangbang toys

You know how your guns were supposed to protect your freedom, until terrorists attacked a city you'd never even been to and you rolled over and gave it all up? This proves you are a moron.

We threaten to take your Uhhhhhhhmerilardian Idol and we'll see if you think your guns are still so important.

>>5639627

>>5639844
this

>>5640118
>I think it's totally possible to take your bangbang toys
Nope

>>5640118
>guns
>toys
pick one

>>5640118
Come try you limp wristed liberal faggot.

>>5640152
>implying they're not adult toys

>>5640163
they arent

You may only label your product as "gluten free" if the more regularly available version of the product on the market contains gluten. Putting "gluten free" on products that would never contain gluten anyway results in your warehouse being burned down with you inside

>>5640170
They are. All this talk about muh freedumbs is just part of a fantasy. Like desk jockeys with dive watches rated for 300 meters.

inb4 I saw a minority once so I NEED one

>>5640170
my adult toys double as self defense weapons

>>5640177
I hate minorities, so I need many

>>5640177
>she thinks self defense is the only reason to own a firearm

>>5640177
Reddit pls. Guns are a fun hobby. Not to mention I use mine to hunt. I get most of a years supply of meat that way.

>>5640181
Reading comprehension?

There are many reasons to own a gun. They're fun to shoot. They're fun to look at. They're fun to talk about. They make you feel invincible.

That doesn't cancel out the fact that they are toys. Unnecessary toys, but the same is true of your 300 meter dive watch that has never been immersed in actual water.

>>5640187
they aren't toys when you actually need them

>>5640187
>They make you feel invincible
only if you are a retard whose never been around guns

>That doesn't cancel out the fact that they are toys
they are tools not toys

>Unnecessary toys
how are they unnecessary

>>5640192
And there we have the problem.

If the dive watch enthusiast community wants to fabricate excuses to fulfill the fantasy, the recreational diving industry profits, which helps the economy and hurts no one.

If (implying this is hypothetical) the gun nuts want to fabricate an excuse to fulfill the fantasy, we end up with an increase in deadly street confrontations from dickless asshats picking a fight over a parking place.

I wonder why anyone would want to regulate them.

>>5640197
Some are...

>>5640199
Dude, you're all over the map with your inarticulate defense mechanism. Can't even address your post.

>>5640199
guns are far more likely to be used in self defense not to mention there are other uses for guns besides self defense

>>5640206
Sorry your NRA issue talking points guide doesn't contain a canned response.

>>5640097
>Murderous gangs of criminals once again create an underground distribution network of increasingly impure and adulterated versions of the most widespread psychoactive products used in America
Do you even 1920's?

>>5640212
Sorry you can't convey a coherent opinion.

The issue is communication, not politics.

>>5639501

you realize this means every chili must have every bean and legume in existence right?

>>5639746

meanwhile the Obamas eat from the whitehouse organic garden

>>5640097

>laws stop people from doing things

>>5639988
Here, here, dub dubs confirm it.

It is forever legal to buy anything with the intent of personal consumption. Counties can choose to ban the sale of serious narcotics (cocaine, heroine, meth, crack, etc..) but everything else will be legal everywhere.

If you try to prevent someone from buying unpasteurized apple cider or milk you are forced to drink at least one gallon of it or until you agree you like it.

these retards don't realize I could buy my own apples and make it, I could buy a tub of crisco and eat it, I could guzzle motor oil. Fuck your nanny state laws.

>>5639756
I already deal with that shit in real life and I am sick to the stomach with it. I come to the internet so I can have complete strangers agree with my often absurd views, not dismiss them you complete piece of shit

>>5640271
>I heard that sun-aged raw milk realigns your qi and helps you lose weight; I'm going to pick some up from Jose at the road stand after yoga today!
>I don't know why it happened, but I've been shitting out my intestines since starting my new diet, and now I have to go to the hospital.
>I don't have insurance, but it's okay because the rest of society can pick up the tab for me.

Only whites (Jews don't count) can eat.

/pol/ enough for your thread?

>>5639479
Known vegans shall be hanged on display.

Ads and promotional images that do not honestly reflect the products they advertise are now considered to be false advertisement. Restaurants must agree to random inspections that will gauge whether food produced by them resembles advertisements.

>>5640435
forgot the pic

>>5639479
All Juden are forever disallowed from eating.

It is now illegal to consume steak in any form that is not rare.

>>5639869
>2014
>too much to ask for organic food that hasn't been messed with

no you know what anon, you're wrong and I will support by eating organic and being the healthiest that I can be. deal with it.

>>5640878
mmm organic ice cream, soda, and chips Im super healthy now!!!! XD XD XD

>>5640084
we are so stressed out because the bullies wont stop picking on us!

>>5640435
oh come on. you're not buying the picture, you're buying the ingredients shown

how it looks rarely changes that

>>5640883
thats a junkfood snackatarian.

eating a stick of organic butter will still make you fat.

use common sense and speak to a certified nutritionist.

>>5640902
>certified nutritionist

>>5640915
your point is?

>>5639856
There was no suggestion of getting rid of organic food. The point was to get rid of advertising which unthinking people such as yourself become extremist about. Organic does not mean what you want it to mean.

If you really believe technology is bad why are you not living with the Amish? Same thing for anti-GMO. Problem with GMO is copywrite.

>>5640439
Any Whopper I've gotten has looked more like the left than the right.

>>5639504
>10 years
>120,000 dead
pretty shitty civil war

>>5641108
you didn't see this post
>>5639772

>being disapproving of irresponsible GMO corporations = anti-science

>thinks that everything is a chemical therefore no chemicals can be bad

faulty reasoning general

This is what shills actually believe.

>>5639479
All Qdobas must become Chipotles

Soylent only.

All non-vegetarian food is banned, every product has to be produced in a sustainable fashion, GMO is outlawed, pesticides are banned, subsidies for corn, soybeans etc are outlawed and the people resposible for it send to prison, Cooking and baking become core subjects in school starting at fourth grade. Carbohydrates will be taxed in all processed food and fruits and vegetables of all sorts subsidized.

Last but not least the American military forces are required to force this on every other state in the world and the foreign policy of the USA is adjusted to support this.

>>5640172
>>5639555
I can get behind these.

I'd make it illegal to be overweight.
Everyone would wear a device that tracks the amount of calories burned and consumed. If calories consumed is greater then the amount of burned within a 24 hour time period the device injects a toxin into your blood stream and you die 30 seconds later.

>>5641633
thats a bit harsh but alot of it is kinda cool

>>5641659
I don't like this at all. we should educated our peoples better to begin with so they are more likely to have a healthy life. the reason most people are fat (besides eating too much) is that they eat really bad stuff without realizing that its that bad, they simply assume "its junk food I know, junk whatever" but they don't really understand how awful it is.

everyone should be free to do what they want as long as it doesn't hurt or effect anyone else in a real way (you can't stomp on your neighbors garden) but building a bigger garden than them to hurt their feelings isn't punishable for example.

people should all be smart and learn how bad the bad choices are and learn how good the good choices are. more people will turn out healthy.

firing squad for everyone who posts on /ck/ regularly

>>5639726
Given that the statement is generally used to arouse one from an overnight sleep, breakfast food is implied.

All foodstuffs including soft and hard beverages containing cannabis, cannabis extracts, and/or psylocibin are legal for all ages to purchase, possess and consume.

>>5641975
woah going to the bar would actually be worth it for people past 30.

>>5641975
that.. might make the world a better place?

>>5641975
I'd say beyond age 16 after an education course (because America needs it, common sense ain't here nohow)
but yeah I'd rather that than alcohol

Anyone being pretentious about beer on a korean cartoon for little girl image boards will have their testicles removed and shoved up their ass.

Eating with all utensils, apparati, or appendages besides feet is henceforth forbidden.

>>5642113
yer nasty

>>5640259
>>5640214
Do you niggas even see OPs post?

>>5639479
Fructose carries health warnings.

>>5639479
The FDA will no longer spread misinformation about the danger of undercooked meats. Serving well done steak will have legal repercussions on par with a nasty divorce (alimony, seizure of assets, etc.)

bump

>>5641633
>subsidies on corn and soybeans outlawed
>subsidies for all fruits and vegetables

You're a dumb one aren't you?

Go vegan.

/thread

>>5644565
you dont /thread your own post retard

>>5641633
To increase the program's chance of succeeding I would allow all meat and poulty that is grass-fed but taxed at the same time.

>>5644565
what would you do with all the domesticated animals?

>>5644569

lolwut

do you even 4chan

>>5644556
>implying your post isn't redundant
>implying you don't know what I mean

>>5644574

Choose the healthiest and release them into the wild and on ranges, etc. Not needing to have large swathes of land for livestock anymore, people can now get organized into planned, sustainable cities like this...

http://www.thevenusproject.com/

>>5644583
>release them into the wild
where on govt land? Most will dies btw

>Not needing to have large swathes of land for livestock anymor
youll need the same amount or more to have them graze on once they are released plus their population will increase due to uncontrolled breeding and will require more land

>>5639746
>prove a negative

Re-establish the Homestead Act: Go to a tradeschool and learn agricultural science, receive $100,000 and 500 acres of BLM land. You've got three years to make that land produce, or you're liable for the $100k.

>>5640118
>rolled over and gave it all up

You mean we delivered an extra juicy bit freedom to them

>>5644585

That land will no longer be necessary for humans. There will no longer be land owned by the government. You understand this takes place in the future. There is no way people will go vegan overnight.

You didn't visit the link did you?

Anyway, we can exist on a plant-based diet and I would love to have my own personal army enforcing that ideal on the human population. Because with the current state of things, quite frankly, people can go fuck themselves.

>>5644596
>That land will no longer be necessary for humans
what about the farms producing all those vegetables and grains?

>no longer be land owned by the government
thats fucking retarded and will never happen, plus you expect private citizens to own 100% of the land? then they would have to take care of animals you would have released and have to eat that cosr. Not to mention no more national parks

> I would love to have my own personal army enforcing that ideal on the human population
you'd need one, and a damn big one at that

>>5644607
>no longer be land owned by the government
oh also no more interstates or roads since they are all owned by private citizens or even things like public schools and DMV's, health depts, etc since all the land is privately owned and not owned by the govet

Disband the BATFE and undo everything it's ever done.

Technically it has to do with alcohol because technically the BATFE regulates alcohol

But it's mostly about guns.

>>5644607
>what about the farms producing all those vegetables and grains?

Well as is, there is a shit ton of land used to produce vegetables and grains for animals. Some of it can't grow food that humans would eat, but some can.

>>5644607
I personally would say we could eat only the animals we have, and not breed any more.

>>5644681
way to not address anything at all, plus use said the land wouldnt be necessary and it would

>>5644686
Oh oops I misread your post. I'm a different person than the one you were talking to

Vegetarianism and Veganism are henceforth considered seditious and are punishable by hamburger. Everyone must eat no less than 6oz of meat per day. If you cannot afford meat, publicly funded meat will be given.

>>5644684
so then we let them all go extinct?

>>5644701
No we release them you carnist scum

>>5639479
> on penalty of immediate execution, no public statements about food shall be made which are not supported by longitudinal, peer-reviewed, triple-blind studies

>>5639479
I must be respected as god.
How is this food related?

>>5646494
It's food related because they have to wear a hat made of oreo's while they do it!
TADA!