/ck/ - Food & Cooking

m-m good.

>>5438683

>>5438683
Good god

Who has the /tg/ meat bread post and the cosmic brownie shake disaster post?

>>5438692
>cosmic brownie shake disaster post
Oh god, that post. That was nasty.

>>5438695
katamari game

>>5438711
what in gods name is that? is that semen?

My worst food disaster was when I tried making red beans and rice. I didn't realize I needed to soak the beans first, so it turned out inedible. I choked down a couple bites, but I had to throw it in the trash and order a pizza instead.

>>5438720
jenkem

>>5438720
Someones brew at high krausen and was too dumb to apply a blow off tube.

>>5438659

I would probably still eat that if I'm in the mood..

>>5438692
>/tg/ meat bread

I have you covered

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/20154353/

>>5438683
looks like a fucking port-a-john

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u4zw99VsoMA

>>5438659

thank you based dominoes pizza

>>5438889
I fucking new someone was going to post it.

Oh my god. Just why... why god.. I hope she didn't feed that to anyone else.

>>5438889
>macaroni salad
>starts with a can of condensed sweeten milk

Oh I knew this shit was going to be a disaster. Who the fuck would eat this shit. Also, is she breathing heavily or is it the camera person.

>>5438889
Every time this gets posted I'm compelled to watch the whole thing.

I'm also compelled to try making it but with vastly reduced portions to see what it tastes like, but then I get grossed out just thinking about it.

>>5438889
I dunno why, but I don't find this particularly repulsive.

A few of the delis around here do this with a somewhat similar recipe.

>>5438723
like, soak them before boiling them? or soak them as in boil them?

aren't redbeans poisonous raw? like just 5 beans will give extreme vomiting and diahrea
?

>>5439272
you soak dried beans overnight before cooking

>>5439281
I know that, but my roommate didn't know you had to soak them before hand, and they weren't that terrible, he was just using our one working stovetop for like 5 fucking hours.

and with all the kids asking for 'recipes' for the simplistic shit, I wouldn't be suprised at someone eating dry beans

>>5439286
>First time I ever cooked rice
>Put random amount of water in
>Walk away for awhile
>Get absorbed in an episode of Its Always Sunny
>"Hmmm my rice smells burny"
>See black smoke rising from my stovetop
>Ruined my roommates pot

I cooked a ribeye steak 4 minutes on each side, which made it smoke heavily and turn black around the edges. Pretty much well-done, going on towards burnt.

What made this a real abomination was that it was actually extremely juicy, which I didn't even know was possible. I guess basting with butter/juices and resting did that.

>>5439315
>Cooking two slices of leftover pizza
>Put them on the rack
>Walk away
>5 mins later I smell fire
>Grease fire in my over
>Fire department got called cause people could see the fire from my kitchen window

Thats the day I bought good baking sheets

still gets me

More of a drink disaster once but related to food. I made a really nice salsa in some blender, I used really hot habaneros, chocolates, and they were not covered in chocolate.

That salsa was really good, so I cleaned it up, or so i thought. Yeah, then made some drinks in them, the problem was that it wasn't cleaned properly and my girlfriend at the time and I both looked at each other and poured that shit right down the sink.

Chuck that one up to a loss.

Another more recent nasty loss, I put broccoli in chicken noodle soup and the flavor of the broccos infused and made it discusting. BAH!!! YUK!!!!
I don't like wasting food, but somtimes, I come up with nasty shit, it happens though, then good stuff happens.

>>5439369
One of the saddest pictures on the internet, for sure.

Imagine how happy they were to make something so cute for their significant other and then it turned out so bad. Just the latest in a string of mishaps in a relationship that is going nowhere. What is happiness?

>>5439449
I think it's fucking hilarious and if someone made that for myself I'd think of it as a nice gesture and be grateful because they put effort into it. I'd still laugh about it regardless

>>5439449
>>5440447

>>5440719

>>5438889

>>5440721
would eat damned souls/10

>>5439391
>I used really hot habaneros, chocolates, and they were not covered in chocolate.
This sentence isn't making sense to me. Nor is the rest of your post, really.

My favorite

>>5440721

>Behelit Bread

Recipe please

>>5440821
what the fuck is that patty supposed to be

>>5440856

looks like a veggie burger

>>5438659
The hell is this? Cheese squeezed out of a bottle onto a crust and pasta?

>>5440863

It looks like frozen mac and cheese cooked on an oven pizza

>>5440795
>you now remember the fat czech woman that used to post here

>>5440821
that honestly doesn't look bad, comparatively.

>>5440863
That is a domino's pasta bread bowl. They are awful.

>>5440903
Nah nigga that's some good shit

>>5439281
>>5439286
you don't have to soak, I never do

>>5438889
oh god.

>>5440937
Reported for gore

>>5440937
God damn look at all that fucking oil, lordy that cannot be good.

>>5440719

>>5440721
It's all I can see.

NSFW

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harlequin-type_ichthyosis

>>5441051
Scotch ostrich egg?

>>5438695
I hope you didn't wash the cat down the sink

>>5441060
>REDUCED SODIUM SALT

WHAT

I'm getting drunk at the moment and I'm gonna be cooking a pizza from scratch soon so maybe I'll have something to contribute to this thread a bit later on.

>>5441722
you probably shouldn't cook drunk. terrible things happen.

>>5441717
they mix it with potassium chloride so it's only 50% real salt

>>5441797
I got drunk cooking down to a fine art form.
I already got the dough rising on the kitchen bench, still trying to figure out what I'm gonna put on it.
Quick search of my fridge and pantry reveals onion, anchovy, bacon, olives, cheese, tomato paste, a tin of pineapple and some fresh basil in the backyard.

Think I might go everything apart from the pineapple, just seems out of place with the rest of my ingredients.

>>5441833
OH THAT MAKES IT OK THEN, LOL

>>5441844

...what

>>5439059
Me too, I watch the whole thing. It really is interesting. Also, the weber cooks videos.

A can of condensed milk AND a whole cup of sugar...then all that mayo. Aw hell naw.

Also, Sara has new videos, you should check them out. Last time I checked, the comments weren't disabled. It might be a different channel though.

>>5440937
Oh fuck what is that? Oh fucking hell what is that??? I'm gonna have nightmares. I can almost smell that shit. Smells like old rotten bell peppers and burnt hair.

>>5441841
I heard a story on here about some guy chopping vegetables or some shit when he was drunk, he dropped his knife and cut his sandaled foot open, then slipped in the maelstrom of blood unleashed and cracked his head unconscious on the floor.
But you're a master of the arts, I see. Hubris was never anyone's downfall.

What could go wrong?

>>5441954

>>5441954
>>5441957

nothing wrong with either of these.

someoneatethis.tumblr.com

>>5441957

>>5441963

>>5441961
And what did you eat? Banquet "dinner"?

>>5441967

>>5441929
Well now I have the dough made, and all the things that needed a sharp knife have been cut up, I'm still pretty coherent right now and the oven will be switched on in about 2 hours from now after I assemble the pizza ready for the bake.
My oven has a setting where it switches off after the timer makes a noise but I probably wont use that.
Trust me, I'm good at this.

>>5441967
really bomb banh mi subs from this vietnamese place, actually.

>>5441971
Is Old El Paso a world wide brand?
I'm in Straya and it's the only Mexican food I eat.
There is always a taco and a burrito kit in my pantry, is it the same world wide?

>>5441961
What is that? Risotto?

Whatever it is, it doesn't look that bad. It's just in a weird ring shape. It'd probably look fine if it wasn't put into a mold.

>>5441986
I'm in the Pacific Northwest and they sell it here, but I never use it.

>>5438889
This is my first time ever browsing /ck/. I'm a regular of both /d/ and /pol/, and I have honestly never seen something like this.

Christ almighty, there's just too much to handle.

>>5441979
Got the pizza ready to wak in the oven.
Told you I'm good at this.

>>5442171
Looking good! How are you gonna get the pizza out of the pan on the left?

>>5442179
The pan on the left is pretty old and scratched up so I put some baking paper under the dough, it will slide right out. I'll post a pic.

The pizza on the right went into the freezer because I'm forever alone, it will make for a simple meal in the future.

>>5442193

>>5442196

>>5442198

>>5442204

>>5442207

>>5442210

>>5442211

>>5442213

>>5442216

>>5442185
I think I'm posting in the wrong thread, this looks pretty successful!

>>5442219

>>5442222

>>5442224

>>5442226

>>5442220
Looks good. You've definitely mastered the fine art of drunk cooking.

>>5442227

>>5442231

>>5442232

>>5442235

>>5440903
>>5438659

In theory a pasta bread bowl sounds tasty but that's a lot of fucking starch.

>>5442237

>>5438683

That's what you get when you serve food in a toilet bowl.

>>5442241

>>5442243

>Be 8
>Decide to make hash browns
>"Shit, I didn't use enough oil, better put more in!"
>Used flour to smother fire
>Lucky as fuck it worked

I've come a long way since then.

>>5442229
These two pizzas all up would have cost me less then 5 bucks.
Cooking drunk is an important skill, dialing pizza is not.

>>5441833

Aren't lethal injections just a high dose of KCl (among other things)?

>>5439391

Chicken noodle soup with broccoli is actually pretty good. You're doing something horribly wrong, or you just don't like broccoli.

>>5440930

Indian food?

>>5441957

That just looks like the top of a pot pie. What's the filling?

>>5442211

That looks like sauerkraut and ketchup on a fruit roll-up knockoff from the Chinese dollar store

>>5442220
Ooh, that looks delicious! Definitely in the wrong thread, haha

No pic, but I baked a cake for strawberry shortcake, was perfect, then, I used whipping cream for frosting. I over whipped the cream, and I said, aw fuck it and spread it over the cake and put it in the freezer.

>Be 6
>Want popcorn
>Too retarded to understand the microwave (really can't understand why I couldn't figure it out)
>Think well the toaster oven will do better
>Put microwave popcorn in toaster oven
>Watch as it sets fire
>Freak out
>Dad is asleep in living room
>Don't want to wake him and make him mad
>Call fire dept.
>Fire dept gets there, they take our toaster oven and put it out in our doorway
>Skinny mexican standing next to me and my dad telling me I did the right thing

I also made a lot of "soups" for my dad while he slept when I was 6, they normally consisted of water, hot sauce, and a mix of spices that I had no idea what they were, and frozen vegetables. My dad would eat it.

>>5442196

doesn't look too terrible

>>5442260

he probably just overcooked the broccoli in the soup.

>>5442315

>I also made a lot of "soups" for my dad while he slept when I was 6, they normally consisted of water, hot sauce, and a mix of spices that I had no idea what they were, and frozen vegetables. My dad would eat it.

aww

>>5442257
Yeah KCl is used to finally stop the heart. You need to inject it into the heart to do this though, eating it is fine.

>>5439315
>women

>>5441797
I just eat tuna, mayo, onion and pineapple mixed together when I'm drunk, it's my favourite thing but I feel too ashamed to eat it sober. I swear it's a hangover preventer or something though.

>>5441060
>adding salt to pizza

>>5441986
nah in USA we just buy frozen burritos and microwave them hoes

>>5442334
you know...that doesnt sound all that bad

sober or otherwise

>>5442340

I'm glad someone agrees. Most people, all my friends and family at least, find it repulsive. It even sets some of them gagging.

Also, to change things up I eat it on cruskits for that carbohydrate kick. Fuck drunk takeouts.

>>5442204
>>5442198
>>5442196
Where did you get these pictures?

>>5442334
Sounds like a tuna salad with pineapple. I'd eat that.

>>5441841
oh man, I've wanted to cook pizza for a while and i'm getting drunk - maybe I should

>>5441986
yuck

>>5442390
>>5442390
Fucken why not?
What you got, I'll help mate.

>>5442390
you might pass out and wake up with a black charcoal disc in your oven

>>5442211
Beef stroganoff TV dinner poured onto an omelette?

>>5442219
Afterbirth oatmeal?
>>5442222
Tomato Omelette by a retard.
>>5442224
Drunk idiot with a blowtorch try to char your food.
>>5442232
This shepherd's pie meatloaf looks fine to me.
>>5442237
>>5442241
Why do people ever make aspic ever. Even done right it looks awful.

>>5442226
Oh my God. Oh my GOD.

OH MY GOD!
What is this, some new eating disorder?

That guy will not shit for 18 weeks.

>>5438889

That bowl alone is what I'd get in 3 days. Jesus christ.

>>5442433
asspic

>>5442452
Japanese Burger King takes "have it your way" very literally.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ugIDfvUpcwY

>>5438711
this is what happens when you don't use a tube and a bottle or small demijohn as your airlock, it allows for overflow wirh no mess.

>>5442231
classic

>>5442331
I mean if you're ok with a fairly negligible dose of radiation.

>>5441986
They sell it here in Canada.

>>5442196
>>5442198
>>5442204
>>5442207

>mfw looking at those now

I'm so glad the dark age of 2006 and 2007 is over, I don't remember eating anything other than TV Dinners and those for dinner for 5 days a week. Makes me wonder how I managed to pull it off with how disgustingly low quality the food was.

>>5442972
The hell is that combination...I assume this is some kind of vegetarian option?

>>5442979
Is that ranch dressing or mayonnaise?

>>5442991
I dunno, but a culinary student made it. Make of that what you will.

>>5442972
its that artichoke chokr edible after just boilimg it?

>>5443006
>a culinary student
mayonasse then

>>5438889
>ALREADY SHREDDED CARROTS
WHAT THE FUCK

Who can't shred carrots, just what the fuck

i don't take pictures of my abominations sadly.
most of the food i make looks disgusting to be honest, but at least it tastes good.
my latest abomination was making some good old meat gravy for some pasta, i think what the hell i have some redwine so why not add a cup.
>realize afterwards that it has been open on the kitchen counter for 4 days.
goddamn it smelled terrible and tasted even worse.
ate it up because if its not burnt, its edible.

>>5438889

>>5438959
don't worry anon, that's just her second breakfast.

>>5445909
I don't believe this, no one can be this stupid.

>>5441986
Confirming popularity here in UK.

>>5442315
he sounds like a cool dad

>>5438889
I almost puked. Dear fucking god why?! I couldn't watch it til the end, I couldn't take it after she... it... thing dumped the pasta into that bowl.

>>5438889
condensed milk, then sugar. a whole jar of mayo. im literally getting all of the conditions.

i feel like if this was made in a smaller amount and maybe less dressing, it would look a whole lot less disturbing.

that's just her midnight snack right?
"a three dimensional food experience" yeah

>>5440721
i love this and im going to make it for my mum.

>>5440846
the fucking perfectly round hole in the ceiling. tbh i wouldnt even be angry i'd just laugh at myself. for days.

>>5440937
hahahahahahhahah. it looks so much like vomit it aint even funny. it even has a pool of bile in the middle.

wait. it isnt vomit right?
right?!?

>>5441929
my dad was drunk in the kitchen once and he dropped a bottle of beer then stood on it and literally sliced his foot in half.
he was so drunk that he ddint notice and watched a dvd then went to bed.
he went to the normal accident and medical place then drove to the hospital and they told him that he'd cut through his tendon almost to the bone and had lost a lot of blood.

dad almost killed himself by cutting his foot off and then going to sleep.
I made sure to scream at him for half an hour and never let him drink again.

I went home to get his medication the day after he went to hospital and there were still wet puddles of blood everywhere.
took four months and two surgeries to heal..
smfh

>>5441986
does nz count. we have it here a lot.

>>54422045
oh god i actually gagged im 100% serious

>>5442220
do you have countdown in america or are you in newzillund/straya?

>>5440860
Looks more like one of those god awful nut roast patties to me, aka veggie burgers for people too up their own arse to pick up a sandwich with their hands.

>>5442528
xxx- xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxtra bacon
that bacon looks rank though

>>5442597
You'd have to stop eating bananas if that really concerns you

>>5441986
It's around a lot in the UK, but if that is the only mexican food you eat you are missing out

Even compared to other big kit brands like discovery, old el paso is pretty shit, and it's a far cry from making it yourself. (Salsa and spice mixes that is, I'm usually too lazy to make tortillas).

>>5438659
Food gore incoming!

>>5448587

>>5448588

>>5448589

>>5448590

>>5448591

>>5448592

>>5448596

>>5448597

>>5442224
Looks like some drunken goon cooked a frozen pizza with the plastic still on

>>5442232
looks like a dead mouse

>>5438889
>1 can sweetened condensed milk
>1 cup sugar
>1 cup white vinegar
>16 oz jar of mayo
>1 lb cooked macaroni
>1 large green pepper, chopped
>3 stalks celery, chopped
>1 large onion, chopped
>2 cups shredded carrots
>salt and pepper

Someone please make this, then eat the sugary, soupy mess and describe your experience. I need to know.

>>5439315
Goddamn, I can smell it.

>>5440821
Is that a lemon?

>>5441051

Can ostrich egg actually be any good or do people just cook it for their novelty size?

>>5441844

>>5442977
>muscles
>vegetarian

>>5442972
ces plateaux, ces couverts, ce yaourts danone... cette image capture parfaitement l'expérience de 'LA CANTINE'

From Masterchef last season...

botched angel food cake i made

>>5449433

>>5449433
>>5449435

holy fuck what did you do wrong

>>5449441

tried whipping the egg whites with a hand whisk

>be like 8 years old
>Mom's a nurse, Dad deserted us
>Mom usually out for most of the day
>have to learn to fend for myself
>decide I want bacon
>Mom out at work so I get the pan out and the ingredients
>dump like half a cup of oil in pan
>add bacon strips
>turn on heat
>wander off into other room to watch "Major Mudd"
>fall asleep
>wake up to the smell of smoke
>run into kitchen
>pan on fire, tons of smoke, etc
>dump flour all over it to put out grease fire
>run around house opening up every window in sight
>turn on all the fans
>take pan, toss in sink
>proceed to scrub stove, floors, everything completely clean [mother was an army nurse, by this age I knew how to clean]
>two tiles on the ceiling are smoke-stained
>fuck
>wait
>stand on counter
>flip tiles
>they look normal
>look at pan
>it's fucked
>take down to river behind my house and chuck it as far as I can
>go back to house, clean everything again, run around house spraying cancer-filled air freshener
>fall asleep exhausted in front of TV
>wake up to Mother brushing my hair
>absolutely sure she knows
>she's smiling and doesn't suspect a thing

>>5441967
is..... is that on the kitchen floor?

>>5449433
Jesus.

>>5449469
you done good son

>>5442168

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zz4Y4882abM

enjoy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5rMuYVXk8Zk&list=PLnPDn1Lb79JFBD0Jjb2zRVxxyzCivzt7w

I'm not even sure what to make of this really.

i have no words https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hxXboaQBzso

>>5441958

look closer at the second one. see the pool of oil on top of whatever that shit is. it makes me nauseous just thinking about stirring a fork through it

>>5445909
>say "if you were being boiled alive, wouldn't you?"

Holy shit I don't care how true this is, this i shilariou

BUMP

What is Pad Thai supposed to look like?

I tried making it tonight and ended up with this plate of slop. Tasted pretty good though.

>>5449468
You suck at whisking.

>>5442254
>burnt
Good job you drunken twat

>>5449158
>muscles
>mussels

>>5451281
That's just shitty lighting and a camera phone, ain't no burn.

>>5449469
i remember when I was at work and it was my first day closing by my self. i was all chilling then a I got a dinner rush and start cooking like a mad man. I had two pans going cooking eggs when I ran to other side of kitchen forgot about pan come back and see its smoking as the oil/butter mixture we use burned the pan i freaked the fuck out luckily It came off pretty easy by the end off the shift since i soaked it in some water with this special soap for the pans. The next day I got good reviews and the week after they out my on the line full time... they have no idea what happened

>>5441986
funny im from El Paso there is nothing like authentic mexican cooking and authentic Red Chile the shit in the can is literally total shit fresh tortillas are also fucking amazing the only dish I can think of that comes close to authentic is the sour cream green chile enchiladas from Village Inn because I have actually made the sauce if the green chile they used was well not from a fucking bag those would be awesome. If you are going to use shit from a can go with GOYA not Old El Paso

>be 5 years old
>it's Mother's Day
>yesterday at school we'd made cards with a tea bag and a packet of coffee in them to give to her as well as a cookie we made
>wake up at 6 in the morning to prepare her surprise
>mum never drinks coffee so decide to try and make tea
>pour glass of water and put whole tea bag in it
>put glass with cookie on a chopping board and go to take it to her room
>go to wake her up to surprise her
>lose balance of chopping board making the glass spill everywhere soaking the cookie and bed
>she wakes up to her quilt covered in shitty tea water and me holding what's left of the soaked cookie crumbs while crying
>tfw never have attempted to surprise her with breakfast in bed again

>>5442224
Oh I know what happened here lol, used plastic cheese instead of regular cheese, shit burns black in seconds

>>5442343
They just hating on tuna, fuck yeah cruskits
I'd eat the hell out of that

>>5448575
Ha! Select brand lol

>>5449408
The fuck am I even looking at?

>>5451412
>be 5 years old
>yesterday at school
underageb&

>>5451244
holy shit did you completely forget the rice stick?

Tried making spaghetti putanesca. Used sardines instead of anchovy paste. Did not taste good.

>>5439369

>all could have been avoided if they'd taken them out and left them to cool on the rack for a bit

>>5451244
did....did you use, pasta?

Banana penis that you can eat DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS

>>5438889
every single time I watch this....I puke; every time.

>>5438889
it's terrible. It's the worst thing I've ever seen on 4chan.

>>5446196
He sounds like a drunk.

>>5451627
What's rice stick? I used rice noodles.

>>5452230
Rice noodles.

>>5438889
The labored breathing...
What a terribly sad video

>>5452593
>>5452596
What you used looks like overcooked spaghetti noodles, almost. Did you just use some kinda gluten free rice pasta instead of proper rice sticks?

>>5442331
you can fuck yourself up just fine by eating too much KCl too.

hyperkalemia, mane

>>5441217
Scostrich egg

>>5442254
holy shit. it's the frist time I see someone on 4chan with my exact same laptop. it feels weird to look at it on sucha different setting.
ignore me, i'm high

>>5441963

the vegan version of "shit on a shingle"?

>>5452634
I used these soft rice noodles that you put in a bowl with boiling water for a bit to soften them up a bit.
I think because I used chicken instead of prawns I got scared and overcooked the whole dish.
Like I said though it tasted OK.

>>5453469
>overcooking pad thai
>overcooking chicken
you done fucked up. here, let me help you

>boil rice noodles until al dente
>get a fucking wok
>chop up your meat, stirfry it with a light amount of oil until just cooked, put it to the side
>stirfry tofu until hot and crispy, set aside
>stirfry egg just until firm, set aside
>reheat wok, saute garlic until aromatic and return everything except meat and bring up to heat
>mix in spices, cut heat, add chives, sprouts, and meats, toss thoroughly and serve

that's it. it's not actually that hard.

>>5445890
right, it was just vinegar. you wouldn't die from it

This thread is really testing my gag reflex.

>>5446196
>>5452488
lol'd hard

>>5454545
>>5445890
wine only turns to alcohol if you let it sit

>>5441844

It's for people who are on a sodium restricted diet. Potassium salts tastes about the same, just isn't sodium.

>>5438889
just in case anyone wasnt aware, she's had a new channel for a while

https://www.youtube.com/user/junklovers

>>5438659
Here's mine from last time.

>>5451533
>its mothers day
>yesterday is clearly relative to the story not to real life.

anyone got the screencap for the idiot who thought baking soda could be substituted by cornflower and tartare sauce?

>>5438889
This is not okay.

>>5439315
what the fuck am I looking at?
It looks like the stay puft marshmallow man fucked an oven.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qx48llBI9KY

I love this thread

>>5449810
There is no god

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XgRlfgV0h9w

>>5442254
Holy fuck dude you have my exact same laptop. Looks cleaner than mine though. Dont usually see people with an inspiron.

>>5448590
The hot dogs of yesteryear seem more like sausages than the emulsified meat pulp we have today....but what the fuck do I know.

>>5438889
>all that heavy breathing
is she dead now?`

>>5449810
HE DOES IT FOR FREE

>>5445909

Almost pissed my pants reading all the way through this. Seriously.

>>5438959
Just the four other "hers" trapped inside of her.

>>5442186
It never occurred to me that someone would actually make a canned cheeseburger.

>>5442315
Aww so cute

>>5440846
can someone explain the physics behind this one? How does a can sitting in a pot of water explode and then cause the pot to fly upwards?

>>5438762

american standards, everybody

it never ceases to amaze me the shit people here are willing to put into their bodies

maybe a childhood of disgusting high-fat school lunches trained you to never draw any lines when it comes to the quality and nutritional content of your food

>>5449072

tastes pretty much the same as normal eggs

>>5441971

pls be refried beans

>>5442224

that's a st louis style pizza, you can tell by the way the processed cheese turns into a plastic film when melted

How the fuck do you turn your rice into the fucking monolith from 2001?

>>5442315
>Watch as it sets fire

Oh god that mental image is just too good

>>5449779

>"Chef"
>with long, fake nails

Okidoki

>>5439369

every time

>>5456612

What am I looking at there. Where was the egg supposed to be? Why is there a black bar in your pan or whatever that is? That's really weird, man

>>5440821

>a lemon

>>5458996

If you have a basketball on the floor and you smack it downards with a stick, the ball will bounce up from the downward force because the ball cant push the earth down.

Its a similar effect, the pressure of the can has the same effect on the metal pot.

>>5438889
I actuallty felt sad watching this. Not just for the woman, but also for America. I don't understand how this could be considered o.k. anywhere, and I certainly never want to make that recipe

>>5442315
>I also made a lot of "soups" for my dad while he slept when I was 6, they normally consisted of water, hot sauce, and a mix of spices that I had no idea what they were, and frozen vegetables. My dad would eat it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzN7DmVLs4w

>>5440721
Ah god, I havent laughed that hard in ages

>>5458996
The lid was on the pot, note how the middle of the hole shows the ceiling was crushed there

>>5438659

>>5438889
You can't feed that to people. That's voluntary manslaughter.

>>5438889
>>5456260

Finally she's in 1080p

>>5460320

There's just no neck, man. No neck at all.

>>5460320

My god. She's even more glorious in hd.


Two ingrediant:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=zz43zzuLsiY

Nevermind that the cake mix lists 18 separate ingredients.

>>5442232
that doesn't look too bad, actually.

>>5460320
yessss!

>>5460320
>https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=zz43zzuLsiY [Embed]

shes at risk for disaeses :(

>>5460443
3000 bucks says she already has db

>>5460443
everything about her and her house is jumbo sized.
them giant ass pans on the stove

>>5458155
In japan they have cheeseburger vending machines. Its the grossest thing Ive ever encountered.

>>5460464
>cheeseburger vending machines
>gross
u wot m8?

>>5460467
American post.

>>5438889

>>5438683
when I saw that was supposed to be oatmeal I lost it

Not me, but one of my friend's dad:
A) Put chicken in a blender with the bones still in.
B) Blended old pancakes to make new batter.
He has a PhD in biophysics.

>>5442528
>rocketnews
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dx7iZpWCbPw

simply sara has a lot of good recipies too

>>5461840
>not eating an american style hotpot
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=urdJ2HT8Aok#t=177

>>5461878

What's up with Japanese TV and all those overlays with text and stuff?

>>5439326
>Cooking two slices of leftover pizza
>Cooking
>left over pizza
What's wrong with you?

>>5461952

Dude, a couple of days ago there was something on TV where a "chef" was showing you what to do with leftover food.
He used a cookie cutter to make little circles out of two slices of leftover pizza, put fresh tomatoes and basil on them and put them in the oven. What the shit.
Motherfucking stupid hipster "chefs".

>>5461954
What the fuck? Why? If you're gonna go through the trouble of cooking something just make it all fresh.

>>5441136
definitely do not do a google images search for that!

Not an outright disaster, but once I tried to make some chocolate-chip cookies and underestimated how far they'd spread out in the oven. They still tasted pretty good, but when you look into your oven and see this, you know you dun goofed.

>>5461840
>close up

I CAN'T DO IT

>>5448575
definitely not america, check the electrical outlet

>>5442525
topkek

>>5457256
I've had this laptop for like 5 or 6 years now and never had a problem with it.

>>5441986
canada here

i buy the ground beef seasoning all the time

>tfw cant spoiler

>>5440855
glad ya see it too.

>>5460185
Looks like too much water was added