/ck/ - Food & Cooking

1) 290+ pounds

2) the depression that led me to eat a full pint of ice cream the first time, solely driven by emotion

I've had many, but it's hard to remember them all.

The most recent one was in Austin during vacation.

>wake up
>get some fucking donuts, fuck yes
>walking back, see the breakfast taco/migas stand
>why the fuck not? grab a brown bag full of both
>chow down, everyone else wakes the fuck up
>brother-in-law says, guess what motherfuckers its bbq tiem
>all pile in the car
>drive to one badass bbq joint, get a bunch of greasy ass sausages
>devour them with some butterkrust, fuck yes
>go to the next joint for some fatty brisket, get 6 pounds for 4 people
>tear through that shit, i'm already getting food drunk and its only 11 am
>fuck it, i need dessert
>get sauerkraut (WHAT THE FUCK THERE'S BRISKET IN THIS KRAUT), pickles and beans.
>eat all of them for dessert
>waddle back to the car, drive back to austin
>get some midday tacos on the way back to the house
>stop for smokes, get a couple pints of ice cream just in case
>going to go to his swank-ass italian restaurant for dinner, decide we need snacks first
>go to his other restaurant, it's half-off oyster day
>get six dozen oysters, tear through all of them
>go to italian restaurant, oh fuck it's a seven course meal
>eat a fuck ton of pork belly, guanciale, braised rabbit foot
>chocolate for dessert
>oh god, i have to get into the car horizontally, can't bend over any more, shooting buttons off my shirt
>get back to the house
>eat ice cream

i came back six pounds heavier in a week.

>>4815349
About five times I ordered a large pizza with full on toppings from Pizza Hut, along with the wing and bread stick side. I'd consume all of it in one night except two or three slices of pizza which I'd have the next morning or in the middle of the night. Not proud, ashamed is what I feel. Health kick 2013, I avoid pizza altogether, even just a slice. My fucks were once lost, but now they have returned and they are given. With a vengeance.

>>4815364
Jesus fucking christ dude, I don't think a single thing I've done can even compare to that. I give up, you win.

When I was in college, I would eat large pizzas by myself and think nothing of it. Like, for a single meal. And I worked in an indian restaurant where I ate for free...and I must've eaten like a $24 meal every lunch- triple portion of curry, 2 kebabs, half a tandoori chicken, handful of paneer on top of it. So to eat that and then come home, eat a large pizza by myself for dinner, then go out and drink like 15 beers...

>>4815377

you need to hang out with more chefs. we get down on some food like no one else.

I ate like 4 pounds of meat once with only a small token salad as a side. Carbs apparently really stymie my appetite.

>>4815380
My roommate worked for a restaurant and would bring home 3-5 racks of ribs a night. None of them lasted long.

>>4815364
How...how do you even fit that much food inside yourself without feeling sick and like you're going to die. That is both impressive and repulsive.

>>4815374
I hope they were also stuffed crust.

The first time I got stoned I think I ate 6 bags of crazy bread.

all while walking home 4 miles.

This was during my bulimic period, which makes it kind of unfair. Because I'd literally PLAN this shit.

>out with friends, go to the mall
>entire cinnabon (1000 calories fyi) before we start
>shop a little
>hey let's get lunch
>huge plate of cream pasta at the cheesecake factory
>and of course cheesecake
>delicious sweet breads and butter
>all friends surprised as usual about how much I can eat
>head to bathroom
>hang out a while longer, go home
>grocery store on the way home
>frozen Marie Callendar's Pot Pies (mushroom ones)
>cream and butter
>chicken tenders
>already have the rest at home
>pick up a bag of cheeze popcorn to eat while I cook
>come home
>throw pies in the oven
>eat entire bag of popcorn
>drink soda while cooking cream pasta
>bake chicken fingers
>inhale 3-4 servings of pasta with chicken
>pot pies are done!
>inhale
>bathroom
>bathroom
>bathroom
>break out the chocolate cream pie
>inhale
>bathroom
>friends call and ask if I want to go out
>we get taco bell
>gordita crunch wraps fuck yeah!
>no bathroom since this is my "real" dinner

Glad I've moved past that point. Weirdly enough, when I planned one of these, I wouldn't buy any veggies even though I like them. I "respected" their nutritional value too much to waste them this way. I always went for total crap that wouldn't have nourished me anyway.

>>4815364
>>oh god, i have to get into the car horizontally, can't bend over any more, shooting buttons off my shirt

My brother did that once we went out to a all you can eat Sunday brunch. I stuck to the salad bar and one entree, because I hate feeling bloated and gross.

At first I thought he was being sarcastic about being in pain, not being able to move, needing to take an hour or two nap, and just playing it up for fun.

But after reading what you ate, I can see people actually having to do that. I wonder if anyone's ever eaten so much their stomach ruptured or exploded and they had food leaking all inside their internal organs.

>>4815401
Man I was bulimic for a bit myself but I never got THAT bad.

>>4815409
I kind of want to look this up now but at the same time I'm not sure I want to know.

>>4815401
why is bulemia bad again? I mean I love overeating and don't wanna be a fatty... why is bulemia not a good option? Not real keen of vomiting but maybe I get used to it?

>>4815423
Because vomiting can seriously fuck up your body. Just look it up.

>>4815423
your teeth get yellow to the core- no whitening will help.

you can have a heart attack or several other really bad things if you get too far into it

you'll get "bulimia face" and people like me who know what that looks like will immediately know your secret.

Bulimia face is a fat face by the way, so your face gets fat anyway.

>>4815438
That's only a few things it can do to you.

>>4815440
yeah, figured "You'll look bad, people will know by looking at you, and you'll eventually die" was a good start.

>>4815438
What if you're already a smoker with yellow teeth?

checkmate, eaters.

back when I was 17 or so I went out for a drive to get some fresh air and get stoned.

While out, I came to the realization that I really fucking love double cheeseburgers. Every time I'm out I would always get 2 from somewhere. But I had never really made a ranking.

So.. I decided to try each fast food place in town that afternoon.

I drove through two different mcdonalds for 2 double cheeseburgers at each, (found out one was better than the other, and this was before the mcdouble), a wendys for two double stacks, burger king for 2 double cheeseburgers, and a hardees for 2 double cheeseburgers.

At the end I decided I needed a different flavor to top it all off so I went back to the better mcdonalds and got a double quarter pounder and a big mac.

I got home and mom was setting dinner on the table

I did not feel well at all that night, or for the rest of the week. Thank god for weed to get me through that

>>4815507
I miss high school so much.

>>4815507
>>4815507
I yearn for those days of not being obese and just taking in life, maaaan. I chilled so hard maaaan and you start to get fat, gnome talking bout? Keep eating like that big playa, you'll know how it is. Shit catches up fast.

Probably some Christmas eve.

Looking over my food journal for the past year, it's:

>skipped breakfast
>bowl of honey bunches of oats with skim milk for lunch
>went out for dinner and bought a beer, a gigantic oily pretzel, and a bowl of mac and cheese
>ate a piece of candy and drank some wine after dinner

or

>skipped breakfast
>fried chicken and salad for lunch
>fajitas for dinner

or

>skipped breakfast again
>BLT and an iced tea for lunch
>2 slices stuffed pizza for dinner
>got shitfaced on light beer and hard liquor

all broke 2400 calories, which is 400 over my maximum limit

Breakfast 0930
12 scrambled eggs (half stick of butter)

>Nap

Lunch 1400
triple decker club sandwich, pickle, 2 easy macs, and a pint of red velvet ice cream

>Gaming, masturbation and nap

Dinner 2200
2 boxes of lasagna hamburger helper made with ground italian sausage and a box of toast

Snacks: half a family sized package of oreos and a half gallon of whole milk

>>4815575
Every Thanksgiving or Christmas Eve dinner is the time when I just let myself go

then regret it very much the next morning on the toilet

probably when I wore size 62 overalls and thought it was ok.. When you need a 4x shirt or a size 52l blazer isto small, perhaps it is time to reflect. If you cannot buckle the seat belt in a car or plane it might be time to cut back a bit. The first 50 lbs are the worst. or easiest if . never mind. the easiest 50 are the ones you don't put on. cause easy to gain but damn hard to get rid of. like inlaws or stray cats.

How many people in this thread are American

Christmas is usually almost 2 pounds of food plus some chocolate on top.

>>4815956
I don't know about the 4x shirt thing. My pants are 42, but I bought those when I was 40 lbs heavier and I'm having to punch holes in my belt.

The way a shirt is cut is whats important to me. A lot of times they are sized to be tall more than wide. some 3x's fit me like a glove while some almost seem 2 sizes too small.

My favorite shirts are all 6x though. I just like the comfy feeling of large baggy clothes

>>4815956
Am I the only person that gets flaming anus, hours or constipation, and peeing out my ass with a "i regret nothing" face?

Seriously, unless I have stomach pains and cramps associated with food poisoning or I feel like I'm going to heave, also associated with food poisoning, I really don't associate pooping with eating.

>>4815970
I seem to ping-pong from having days where it feels like I'm trying to shit a square brick out of a round hole and my anus is ripping apart, to days where I feel the fucker there but no amount of pushing is making it move and I give myself a headache from the strain

I took some magnesium pills one time when I hadn't taken a shit for 3 days. They were supposed to pull the water from the organs/tract into the system to clear you out. After the first 10 minutes I started getting light gurgles in my stomach. At the 30 minute mark it would not stop rolling/vibrating/girgling, I kept having very rapid-fire automatic quick farts. About 10 minutes later my eyes went wide and I ran to the bathroom to have the most volacanic watery shit I ever had.

Neighbors probably thought I was playing call of duty or something, the whole block had to hear the RATATATATATATA 10 minutes. I was sweating, I had to flush the stool three times. My heart was racing and I would just_not_stop_shitting_water.

exhausted, I wiped twice. Sore, I gingerly limped into the bedroom and fell on the bed, passed out. I woke up about every 10 minutes for similar, but somewhat lighter, shits.

After about 2 hours of this, I walked into the bathroom again and passed the dankest, greenest, most sludgy and diguesting chunk of turds I have ever seen in my life. Bathroom stank for three days no matter how much febreeze and other scents I sprayed.

And that was the story of the only time I ever got really constipated.

>>4815979
I'm sorry I laughed.

>>4815963
don't gkmme that shit. I have been to the Uk and Contenetal Europe just as many fat ases there or greece o r the mediferainian, and if no one has noticed, except for models people in cetnral europe can get pretty chunky I don't think you can categorise by contenent, or even race and whoa, if pointing a finger, it was at myself, not anyone else ifI road a horse it would have to be a belgian or claysdale. or a big mule. I still weigh in at about 250 lbs and that is much for anything to bere. . ( can hear the horses talking -, ug oh, here he comes, run... not making fun of fat people, hell ,I am one myself just meant to say less is better, fat wise unless raising hogs for bacon ug oh. should not have said that.

>>4816005
What the fuck.

>>4815349
I can tell you about my fattest week...
>be on a seminar for my volunteer service
>last seminar of the year, nobody's doing any kind of work
>drink lots of alcohol
>smoke tons of weed
>the munchies
>they have an excellent kebab restaurant down the street
>plus McD's, BK, Asian and Italian food, tons of other stuff
>...
>After these five days, I wouldn't have been able to tell if I was hungry or not to save my life

>>4815364
>brother-in-law says, guess what motherfuckers its bbq tiem
>all pile in the car
>drive to one badass bbq joint
lol what

>>4815364
>fuck it, i need dessert
>get sauerkraut, pickles and beans.
Ah... what?

I don't even have a face

>>4815979
might I advise you abit,.I know this is ck, but.. yopu really need to get that seen to. quicker the the better or you can do like me a strangulated nave' ( belly button) henia and have a ileostomy, wear a bag, then get it reversed and have a trach, reversed along the way and code twice. and thank GodI had good dr.s I was very lucky, or blessed . or both I. had no insurance, probably about 800 k and it took a while to get over. on peranent disability but I thank God for the Drs Nurse, CNAs and rehab techs you might want to have that looked at, before it gets away from you. even a free clinic. you don't want to let that slide, be well

>>4815487
>checkmate, eaters.
I don't know why I find that so funny but I'm straight up almost dying because of that

Eating a can of frosating in an evening is pretty much my fattest escapade.
It had sprinkles. My vomit had sprinkles. Now I hate sprinkles.

>>4816119
Reminds me of a time I tried to eat a giant-sized bag of those oven-baked mozzarella sticks in one sitting. The giant bag apparently came with really crappily made sticks and I put too many of them in the oven, then cooked them for the time you would cook a normal amount ofr a healthy human being. They came out half-frozen and after like 4 or 5 I nearly threw up. I still eat mozzarella sticks at restaurants, but I don't touch the Farm Rich ones.

>>4816123
we have these often when we get pizza, much better deep-fried

On an alcoholic bender I drank an entire 1.5 liter bottle of Chi-Chi's Mudslide Mix in 12 hours.

Mudslides at 7:00 am?! Certainly!

I was drinking all kinds of shit that week. Ended up gaining ten pounds in one week. I felt disgusting. I was thinking three, four... Certainly not TEN.

bump for moar

Today im off to a good start.

>12oz bag of flamin hot cheetos
>12oz bag of spicy nacho doritos

and im not even mildly full. All in all that's only ~3080 calories and it isn't even noon yet. Good thing I workout all the time and am only 6'0 190 pounds;)

>>4816666
Jesus, two entire bags this early? How.

>>4816670
First of all, I used to be a /fit/izen (getting back into it after recent surgery). Back when I'd be cutting/bulking I would binge eat while cutting which made cutting 99x easier for me. Binge eating makes it a lot easier to do that sort of thing

>>4816676
Well, whatever works for you, man.

>>4816679
It's how people train for eating contests and why like all of the champions are relatively skinny dudes. Binge eating literally stretches your stomach and when you do it over and over again, your body acclimates.

>>4815349
Once, during a summer when they were $0.59 each, I ate 10 McDonalds cheeseburgers in a motel room. Two friends rooted me on, and I eventually triumphed. I felt really fucking full.
That was back when I was fat and didn't give a fuck.

>>4816690
What's it like being really fat? Like I've been chubby and even that was insanely uncomfortable for me, I can't even imagine how it would feel carrying around even more weight.

>>4815349
Last night i ordered a large pizza and ate it all in <10 minutes

>>4816123
are there any frozen cheese sticks that aren't nasty? they all have a weird taste not akin to any you buy at restaurants. i don't get it.

>>4815381
I went out with two other chefs to Le Pigeon in Portland about five years ago.
We ordered the entire menu and 5 bottles of wine. It took three hours and cost over $800, but it was a night to remember.

MFW sitting in the car on the ride home, more content than I've ever been.

>>4815822
sheeeeeeiiiit!!!!

I hit up mcdonalds, burger king, jack in the box, and taco bell all in a sequence. Went home and ate all that food. Later on in the day I ordered a pizza and ate half of it.

I am sure I consumed more than 8,000 calories that day.

I have been fat but nowhere near as amerifat as some people would believe. Fattest I ever been in my life was 220lbs, that was during my neet period where I did nothing but eat hot pockets and play MMOs all day in my mom's house.

>>4815349
I once had 5 heaping bowls at BD's mongolian bbq. That hurt afterward, it was difficult to walk.

>>4816718
>We ordered the entire menu and 5 bottles of wine. It took three hours and cost over $800

>>4815956
I was that fat for years. It was like being in a delusional reality. Once I started losing, I couldn't lose fast enough. Dr. Drew was right about the power of disgust as a motivator.
Just regretting all the years I ate like a hog and had to special order my clothes and attach a seatbelt extender.
Never again.

>>4815409
> I wonder if anyone's ever eaten so much their stomach ruptured or exploded and they had food leaking all inside their internal organs.

It is very common, typically from car and bike accidents or shootings/stabbings.

Willfully eating enough food to rupture a healthy, normal stomach is nearly impossible. Ever successfully supress vomiting after drinking wayyy too much, and while vomiting, were you able to continue to do shots while munching on multiple pork sandwichs?

Trauma resulting in laceration that allows food, enzymes, bile, feces, urine, etc to leak in peritoneal cavities happens all the time.

>>4816748
My mom's been losing weight because she has type 2 diabetes, and she told me when she was overweight she'd shower with the lights off because she couldn't stand to look at herself.

>>4816760
>>4816748
>>4815956

>tfw you are slightly overweight, but not big enough to be disgusted
>tfw you just want to lose weight so you can be a manly adonis
>tfw you cant just look in the mirror for motivation because you are still sexy

Its rough.

>>4816748
>delusional reality
I know that feel. I weighed 240 in high school, cut down to 170 in less than a year from diet and hard work. Went back up to 185 and hovered around there for around three years. Then slowly started gaining again, in March this year I was back up to 240. The whole time I kept ignoring how bad I looked, telling myself I was just getting taller and putting on some muscle from lifting boxes at work.

As of this morning I weigh 188, my goal is 170 by the end of the year and my longterm goal is not putting it back on again like a fatass. Realistically, I'm still flabby for my height of 5'9. Been getting complimented for how much better I'm looking though.

>>4816694
At my peak I was 430. It happened so gradually I barely noticed. Just never thought about it. Lived a life where I didn't really need to exercise, and of course I avoided it the rest of the time because of how sweaty I'd get and how easily I'd be winded. It really never was that uncomfortable because I kept myself in comfort. But huffing up the stairs, putting on socks, even showering seemed strenuous sometimes. But it's living in denial, so you can't see the big picture while you're in it. I'd go through a drive-through and come out the other side with $15, $20 in shit fast food and then drive to an empty parking lot and eat enough to satisfy me for the drive home. I'd load up my coat with burgers and shit when visiting friends, so I could slip away and eat them in the event that there wasn't food readily available. And despite all my eating, I rarely did it in front of people. I was ashamed of it, and had heard that some others claim to be repulsed by the sight of a huge fat person eating.
The good thing is, when the weight comes off, there's a lot of developed muscle under there from hauling all that weight around, so one can slip right into exercise. The more you lose the better you feel, and the better you feel the more you work harder.

How come when I look at myself naked in the mirror I don't think I look that bad, but when I see myself in a public place 80% of the time I am like "Holy fuck look at that fat ass."

Maybe it is a self confidence thing since I am not that confident in public. Or maybe it is because my penis makes the rest of my body look smaller.

>>4816790
how much do you weigh now?

>>4816790
That's insane, man. Congrats for finally getting some of that shit off though, I imagine you feel a hell of a lot better.

>>4816799
215, and I don't think I can go much lower. For my height I'm still considered heavy, but I'm happy and healthy and in the best shape of my life.
I was always the fat kid, back before it was half the kids. Struggled with this my whole life. I feel that I had an unhealthy relationship with food. It's like I'm a recovered alcoholic (of course you can never *quit* eating), and I always have to watch myself and be careful not to fall back into the sneaking and the binging. But my wife is my motivation now, and I really love to play basketball, ride the bike, and swim laps. I don't see myself getting fat again, but never say never. I might blow back up after retirement or something.

>>4816774
Keep at it, lost 30 from 185 at 5'10, been getting compliments left and right and feel sexy as fuck.

As for my fattest day:
>convention weekend
>wake up at 12:00, eat nothing
>15:00, a bit hungry
>go for full pack of dragon's beard at Chinese district
>eat it all like nothing
>come 19:00, hungry as fuck
>go to all-you-can-eat sushi
>fucking love sushi
>order almost everything
>eat it all because otherwise you pay extra
>come out
>at 21:00, feel a bit less bloated
>go to Chinese bakery, cheap pastries everywhere
>get a pack of almond cookies, a pack of butter cookies, raisin bread, other interesting pastries
>eat the whole time coming back home
>get weird flavors of chips at corner store, grilled cheese & ketchup and maple syrup
>eat cookies and chips until 3:00 with friends

>>4816829
Damn, you still lost a ton of weight, man, why stop there?

>First time smoking weed
>Too stoned to remember about the munchies
>At a garden party with an open (shitty) buffet
>End up having 9 absolutely full plates (I normally suck at buffets and can only manage 2 meagrely filled ones)
>Unable to swallow even water, despite being thirsty as fuck
>Try to vomit
>Damn you and your anti emetic properties, THC
>Spend next 3 days unable to eat
>Push out giant turds 24 hours after buffet incident
>Look in the bowl out of morbid curiosity
>It's about the size of 2-3 coke cans stacked together with undigested cocktail sausages embedded in the side
>Subsequent turds the size of lightbulbs follow over the next 45 minute dump session
>Before I can even wipe, I've almost clogged the toilet several times

I don't know how fat people manage to (presumably) do this every day.

>>4815487
You also increase your risk of oesophageal cancer, in addition to the lung and throat cancer you're running from smoking.

>>4816812
Yeah, thanks. It still hurts to see people on 4chan hating on obese people, though. Luckily I never really encountered much negativity. People liked me and I was a nice person and no one ever really said hurtful things to my face (at least after 10th grade or so), though I'm sure they judged.
But to see people so filled with anger and outrage at other peoples' weight problems is sad, and hard for me to understand. No one who knew me ever accused me of being lazy. I've always been a hard worker.
The mean-spirited "fat people stories" you see on /fit/ and /b/ sometimes really don't ring true to me. Most fatties I've known are really nice, and I've never seen anyone push people out of the way so they can have at a trough of food, or chastise people at the supermarket for buying vegetables.

>>4816831
>eat it all because otherwise you pay extra
Wait, what?

>>4816848
rofl, which show is that picture from?

>>4816848
You must not live in America.

>>4816848
I've never been fat, but I completely understand that it's a coping mechanism that most people are in denial about and shit like that just like anything else. People hate what they don't understand, that's the unfortunate fact of life.

>>4816848
I don't have anger or outrage, but I do get disgusted when you see a stereotypical obese person who breathes heavily without any exertion and needs a scooter to get around.

Yesterday at around 14:00 I ate 400 grams of humus in 200 grams of pita bread. Today I woke up fatter.

>>4816885
Hnnnng I could do that too, humus is just too good to stop eating. Even if I buy the premade stuff from super markets and shit (although they make the stuff I buy fresh there) I just can't not eat the whole fucking thing.

Went to like 5 buffets(and I'm talking GOOD buffets) in the span of 2 days once. Ate a fuckton at each of them, felt like dying afterward.

never. fucking. again.

>>4816921
It's a wonder how something like food can take control over us and turn us into fucking ravenous animals sometimes.

>>4815349
208 pounds

Hammering down a "family" (~15 inches across) double cheese meat-lover every three to four days with a 1½ litre Coke to wash it down.

>>4816949
It amazes me how many people in this thread can down a pizza by themselves. I can barely eat more than 2-4 slices depending on how big they are.

>>4816954
Sadly... it's down to practice.
When you get in the unhealthy habit of only eating once a day, larger portions are easy, but it's hard to cut down again when you go back to a proper 3 meal schedule.

Nowadays, any quantity less that that leaves me almost painfully starving at 22.
So I found anew appreciation for oatmeal.

>>4816831
>feel sexy as fuck

Thats a big motivation for me. When I'm slimmed down I actually am sexy as all fuck, when I was around 170 I was pulling cooze that I can't even imagine getting lately. I'm a sort of shy quiet guy and these girls were approaching me, I didn't even have to do anything. Since then my social skills have gotten so much better but I got fat. Where I'm at now my sex life is finally getting off the ground again, when I hit my goal weight I'm thinking I'll be a goddamn sexual tyrannosaur since I've figured out how to talk to women.

I ate a 48 oz steak in one sitting. The restaurant gave me a free bumper sticker for it.

I have a friend who successfully completed the 72 oz steak challenge in Amarillo, Texas. He had to eat some sides with it too. He's a massive motherfucker. I played football with him in college and he's a 6'5 320 lb behemoth. Not even that fat, he's bear mode.

>>4816857
Not the guy you were asking, but at a lot of chinese all oyu can eat places, you can order as much as you like, but if you waste it, (they don't mind a small amount, but if you eat less than half of a dish), you have to pay for the dishes you waste on top of the price of the meal.

>>4817135
Why the fuck don't they just let you take it home? That makes no sense.

>>4816972

Only girl that ever approached me was a super huge Samoan girl that had her friend ask me if I would go out with her. Only other time was this 32 ear old Japanese woman who whispered in my ear that she wanted me in her bed tonight after she had a few drinks.

Other than those two times a girl never approached me. I'm mad jelly. Then again I was only in "sexy as fuck" shape for like 6 months out of the 26 years I have been on this planet.

>>4817139

Because people would just pile shit up on their plate and take it home for their family to eat. If people are forced to eat inside they will not consume as much.

I just ordered a pizza.

This thread made me make up a new rule for my pizza eating. For each slice I eat, I must do 15 pull ups and 25 push ups.

I stopped eating after 3 slices because I could not do any more pull ups. This method is very effective, I don't know why I never thought of it before.

I'll regularly eat entire boxes of pasta/Mac and cheese/large pizzas by myself and I still only weigh 140 pounds

Generally when I eat like I fat as I do t eat much for a few days

Chinese restaurant, went with my friends after high school on Friday (that was "our day" that we went there and gorged ourselves). I ate 16 plates stacked high with crab legs with melted butter, then finished with a soft-serve ice cream and cone. I had such awful farts that night that one of my friends had to hang out the car window when riding in the passenger seat so he wouldn't vomit.

>mfw we ate 37 plates of food between the four of us

>>4817356
our chinese buffet gives us crap small plates, so we started smuggling in our own. Wet rags as well, realized when the hands start to get sticky we would slow down/quit.

>>4817197
If I was fat I'd have banged the Japanese woman no doubt. The better shape I'm in though the higher my standards get. When I was obese I would shamelessly fuck anything that resembled a human female lol. Back when I was fit and looking good it had to be at least a 6or7/10 for me to even pay any mind. These days I'm settling for 4 or 5/10s, hopefully when I hit my goals I'll find some 9/10s again.

>>4817139
People would take advantage. Everywhere I've ever seen AYCE, there's never any to-go availability. People would take extra plates and then ask for boxes.
This already happens at places. People at shitty buffets are known to line their purses with bags to scrape food into. I knew a cunt who would go to Olive Garden (hospitaliano!), order dinner, fill up on all-you-can-eat salad and bread, then take her meal to-go. She actually chided me for eating my dinner there. Not like I was going to subject myself to TWO meals from that shithole!

>>4817508
That's funny, because the times I've seen that mentioned here on /ck/, people would talk about what a good idea it is.

>>4815349
Today having a cheese spinach broccoli turkey bacon quiche and most of the day i have been drinking coffee

Ate 3 MREs in a single day before someone told me what I was in for when it came time to shit.

>>4817714
I can't eat those things. I'd end up completely impacted if I did.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fecal_impaction

>>4817770
I was worried I'd need surgery when I ended up taking a dump 5 days later. We were out at Ocotillo when it happened so after 4 hours of screaming and crying behind a bush in the desert I made it back to camp where I found out my Dad had sent a search party to find me. My ass was the F-4, the shit was the napalm, and the bush was the village.
>dads face when I showed him the impact site

>>4817804
Yeah, that stuff is deadly. Persoanlly, I'd rather have an easy poop in a plastic bag in a crowded troop carrier than suffer the devastation days later from eating MREs.

>>4817627
I was at a chinese place 10yrs ago and they were ready to fist fight over refusing to give me a to-go box... I had 2 fuckin egg rolls and some rice. It was the scraps from the only 2 plates I had the entire meal (not even close to being worth the 10.99 they charge.

Greaseballs knew that if I left with it, they couldn't put it back on the buffet after I left.

college, 3 day weekend, nothing but drinking, 1 day (saturday maybe?) of nothing but MacD's, breakfast, lunch, dinner, late night snack....not too impressive

>>4816718

cheffag to whom you were replying to here.

le pigeon kicks fucking ass, 10/10 would eat a whole menu with you

>>4815423

Also you hate yourself. All the time. All you can think about is food, or how you're the worst, most disgusting piece of shit in the world/ Every meal all you can think about if you're going to be able to puke or not later.

This happens quickly, asin within months, whereas cancer and horrible deaths can take years or decade to occur.

>>4815365
1) 6' 160 pounds
2) I eat half a pint of B+J every night

mmmm, love that 3000+ TDEE

>>4815822

>dat bulk

Please tell me you went to the gym and squatted 4 plate in between lunch and dinner