/ck/ - Food & Cooking

I say "Y-you too" and when she turns away for a second I pretend to put my phone to my ear and run out like it's an emergency

Then I go home and cry and post on 4chan

"Awww, you made me a mash and gravy volcano, like I really am 6!"

Well she clearly doesn't know what my favorite dish is, 1/10 would not love

>>4449568
this looks terrible

>>4449568
"Thanks mum."

I bash her skull in with the haunch of meat, and spend the rest of my life in prison.

>>4449568
>Seduce Him With Peas!

>>4449578

Why?

>>4449578
>Hating a mashed potato volcano

Go be a barren wombed bitch somewhere else, Cat Cora.

>>4449568
>julie lawrys.jpg

I don't get it

"Where are the fucking Yorkshire's?"

I prefer blonde but I'd probably be intimidated and leave the scene

>>4449568

i'd slap her and tell her to fucking cook that meat propperly

Bitch undercooked the meat. And where's the HP sauce? Can't do a proper British without the HP.

>>4449568
bitch can't you see i'm on a cut

I'd eat the shit out of that prime rib.

>old people food

Still, 10/10 would eat. Sometimes old people made good stuff.

>>4449676
I too don't understand this thread. I've never seen so many edgy ironic comments on the internet.

Thanks, mom.

The mash gravy bucket gives me a hardon.

>>4449568
Sir, you steak has not been cooked.

>>4449753
That's prime rib

>>4449709
>butter AND gravy
Well excuse me for not regularly eating like a hamplanet, you hamplanet motherfucker.

>>4449729
>I've never seen so many edgy ironic comments on the internet

>>4449568
Why is there a single piece of corn on the rim of the volcano?

>>4449709
there's no way that shit's butter

>>4449568
I say "If you love me then take this raw slab of meat back and cook it a little longer."

>flavourless white food
>white girl
No thanks.

>post picture from steakhouse
>pretend to have gf
0/10

>>4449800
but why?

>>4449832
But how the fuck did the butter slide against the forces of gravity and end of on the peak pf the volcano?
Still doesn't make much sense to me...

>>4449568
Giving someone cancer isn't love.

>>4449859
I'll concede that this could happen, but that still looks more like a piece of corn to me than partially melted butter.
Not that it really maters, but come on that's just strange.

It's a message
She's ready for anal

>>4449568
Thanks mum, can we go to the pictures this afternoon and have ice cream too?

>>4449887
They all are, even if they don't know it. Or scream and beg you not to.

How can people on /ck/ not know what prime rib is?

>>4449960
I know what uncooked meat looks like and that's good enough for me you elitist twunt.

>>4449960
Not everyone wants to be an expert in corpse munching.

>>4449960
i am new, but to my understanding /ck/ is to food what /o/ is to automobiles, or /fa/ is to fashion; only a small fraction of the denizens have experience with the actual subject matter and are severely lacking in taste. pun intended.

>>4449967
So you have never enjoyed a nice cut of prime rib? How can you say you like good food?!

>>4449978
Welcome to 4chan.

>>4449967

jesus

That prime rib is too underdone.
I like my prime rare too but it's not enjoyable to eat blue prime rib. All you can taste is blood in the middle because it hasn't had time to absorb the flavors and cook, and it tends to be extra chewy and not tender.
Doesn't even look like she let the meat rest since there's still blood seeping through the top. And bitch where's my au jus?

this thread makes me sad

>>4450000
That's not blue rare, blue rare is literally raw, not a lighter red and pink combination. That is not blood, you know nothing of meat. There appears to be thickened pan juices under the slab and on the potatoes, are you blind?

>>4450014
>I don't know what au jus is
It's fine dude. Forget it.

>>4449568
No, I won't buy you something to drink. Now, get some fucking clothes.

>>4450020
I'm asking why you want two sauces for your prime rib you piece of shit, not stating that there's au jus on it.

I'd eat the mashed potato volcano and throw her the fatty as fuck steak and have her eat it off the floor like an animal.

>>4450028
but what of the peas man?

>mashed taters
>peas.. FUCKING PEAS
>raw meat with blood on it
>strange near naked bitch suddenly "loves" me

I'd tell them to fuck off and leave the place. Something weird is up.

>blood
>blood
>fatty steak
>blood
Kill yourselves immediately.

>>4450025
Because it tastes good with au jus?
Restaurants serve prime rib with the juice but can still be assed to serve it with a little cup of au jus.
Stop being a faggot because I insulted your hamplanet meal.

>>4450025
>>4450020
>>4450040
>with au jus
>doesn't know what au jus is
>looks like some au jus

>associating sex with food
Disgusting

>>4450033

It's not a steak, it's prime rib. In case you didn't know, that's a roast, not a steak. What you're seeing is a slice of it.
It's not blood. It's myoglobin.

shoot yourself now, ignorant dumbass.

>>4450030
I guess I'd dump those on the floor too and have her lick them up after she finishes the steak.

>>4449978
/ck/ in a nutshell.
It's good for lurking, but much actual good content there is not.

>>4450048
>he thinks any red liquid in meat is myoglobin
>laughingcow.jpg

>>4450064
We need people like you on this board and this world.

>>4449580

jesus christ my sides

you sir win post of the day

>>4449568
If she cooked the rib a tad longer and made Yorkshire Puddings too I'd give her a right passionate rodgering up the clunge.

As the meal stands currently it's only good for an hour of painal as punishment.

>steak
>red
>not well done

get out

>BUT ITS PRIME RIB
It's still fucking undercooked, the fat isn't even emulsified the slightest bit.

"I said no sweetcorn bitch"

>>4450167
ironic shit posting is still shit posting and there is no room for it here on /ck/. Get back to >>>/b/ 12 year old

>>4450000
it's myoglobin, not blood
the blood is drained during slaughter

>>4450693
That tastes like blood. Call it any name.

>frozen peas
>instant potatoes
>raw beef
>watery gravy

Is this Anon gonna have to choke a bitch?

>>4450696
You have zero functional knowledge of basic biology.

>>4450064
>I do not know how proteins function nor which proteins are present in muscle fibers.
Get out.

>>4450704
This has nothing to do with knowledge of biology.

I know what blood tastes like. And that tastes like blood. Deal.

>>4450715

Obviously you don't know what blood tastes like fucktard, or you wouldn't be calling myoglobin blood. Now go eat your rancid well done steak with ketchup and let the grownups talk.

>>4450720
I'm not the guy that called it blood, assraged faggot.

I only chimed in with agreement about the taste.

>>4450715
>This has nothing to do with knowledge of biology
Yes it does.
>I know what blood tastes like.
Good for you.
>And that tastes like blood.
Not even chemically the same, it is in your head.

I would suggest picking up a book and learning about the difference between myoglobin and hemoglobin.

>>4450722

"I'm not the retard, just the guy agreeing with the retard!"

Compelling

>>4450731
I agree that it tastes like blood because it does. I didn't agree with anything else.

Twist is as far as you like. Then shove it up your ass.

>>4450734
>I agree that it tastes like blood because it does.

And obviously then you don't know what blood tastes like. Thanks for sharing your stupid.

>>4450734
>I agree that it tastes like blood because it does.

So you think that blood tastes like denatured protein?

Good to know that you are retarded.

>>4450735
>>4450746

>being this fucking mad

>>4450828
>Thinking ignorance should be ignored
No wonder this world is full of shit people.

>juices touching the potato

Peas are the only thing on the plate that looks gross. I'd tell that bitch "then prove it!" and whip out my cock

This meat is raw and there is too much fat to chew.

>>4449960

To everyone that thinks people here don't know what prime rib is.... they're trolling. Jesus Christ, it is you who are the new ones.